The claim that "alpha" is defined as requiring violence or assholery is incorrect, and this is backed by scientific studies, dictionary definitions, and leadership psychology research. Here’s why:

1. Official Dictionary Definitions
Oxford English Dictionary (OED):
Alpha (in social contexts):

"A person who assumes a dominant role in a particular group, especially one who is respected or influential."

Oxford English Dictionary - Alpha Definition

Merriam-Webster Dictionary:
Alpha (as in 'Alpha Male/Female'):

"The most dominant, powerful, or assertive person in a particular group."

Merriam-Webster - Alpha Definition

Nowhere in these definitions does it state that an alpha must use violence or aggression to gain dominance.

2. Scientific Studies on Leadership & Alpha Behavior
Study: Dominance Hierarchies in Social Animals
Dugatkin, L. A. (1997). "Winner and Loser Effects and the Structure of Dominance Hierarchies." Behavioral Ecology, 8(5), 583-587.

"Dominance hierarchies in animal and human groups are often established through social signaling, resource control, and cooperation rather than brute force."

Dugatkin, 1997

Study: Leadership Without Aggression in the Animal Kingdom
Smith, J. E. et al. (2016). "Obligate Sociality Without Cooperation: Insights From Other Taxa." Behavioral Ecology, 27(1), 1-14.

"Alphas are often those who exhibit superior social intelligence, cooperation, and decision-making ability rather than reliance on aggressive behaviors."

Smith et al., 2016

These studies explicitly state that alphas do NOT require violence to gain or maintain their status.

3. Leadership Psychology: Alphas Lead Without Coercion
Goleman, D. (1995). "Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ." Bantam Books.

"True leaders, or ‘alphas’ in human social dynamics, are those who possess high emotional intelligence, resilience, and ability to influence without coercion."

Goleman, 1995

Bass, B. M. (1990). "From Transactional to Transformational Leadership: Learning to Share the Vision." Organizational Dynamics, 18(3), 19-31.

"Successful leadership is based on vision, respect, and strategy. Coercion and force are indicative of weak leadership rather than true dominance."

Bass, 1990

These sources define "alpha" as a leader who influences others positively, not through aggression.

4. Debunking the Claim That "Alpha" = Violence
L. David Mech (1999). "Alpha Status, Dominance, and Division of Labor in Wolf Packs."
"The term 'alpha' is often misunderstood. In both animals and humans, successful leadership is based on intelligence, decision-making ability, and social bonding—not brute force."

Mech, 1999

This refutes the claim that alpha = inherently violent.

Final Conclusion: The Definition of "Alpha" Does NOT Require Violence
Dictionaries define "alpha" as dominance through leadership, not necessarily aggression.
Scientific studies show that dominance in social animals is often achieved through cooperation and intelligence.
Leadership psychology research confirms that true human "alphas" lead through respect and influence, not assholery.
The idea that "alpha" = "violent dictator" is a pop culture myth, not backed by science or formal definitions.