Good thing the FBI is knwon to not lie, be truthful, !fullofshit (lol i cannot help myself).

This just in, massive behemouth outdated corporate telecom infrastructure hacked, ClueNN Trust Worthy reporting [PRESENTED BY PFIZER.CLARO.CARTEL.SCHMIT]. writes:

* This hack is unrelated to the NSA PHYBR-OPTIK.SPLITTER ATT SF hack, exploited by the NSA via NSL-2-NOC which piggy backs on the dotCORP infrastructure via SOCIOPATHIC.NYYD by Threat Actor FISA.BS, according to sources.

According to sources CHINESE HAXX0RS have Hacked a DirecTV decoder box from ST, predating 2008 with Leenux Kernel v. -1 (Yes, v. minus-one), and not the kernel 2,3 and 4 shit all over the network. These kernel major versions 2,3 & 4 are totally secure and up2date, says FBI spokes person stating: "Trust Us or FISA_TEH_FUCK_AROUND->OUT".

ClueNN has submitted. a FOIA request to the US Government to find out what we will find out if we FISA around.

According to CVE-000001 and cve-0000000 to cve-202412001; The outdated decoder unit contains a vulnerality after the Boot Loader, where the STB boxes from ST Era and Broadcom SoC are suseptible to arbitrary code execution in $TAKEYOURPICK vulnerable hardware bitsy, which they will vaguely boiler-plate in 90 days, maybe, but if so without any and all useful insight sources state: "The vulnerablity being exploited in the wild leads to arbirary code execution and is actively being exploitedom in the wild by Panda Emails" said to contain the WOKE:MIND:VIRII, politely asking the recipient to dd if=vmlinuz of=/dev/sdd bs=1k then plug the hacking device known as a USB memory stick into the outdated $equiptment or kindly order an N-DAY USB cable from AliBaba, a USB hub and a regurlar USB cable and emailing them back after installing the Advanced Nation State USB technology, providing a helpful click2buy link w/ free shipping."

*The FBI WARNS customers to not click on the cute Panda Emails, citing risk of WOKE.MIND:VIRII infection risks and remain calm on X while Socially-Woke.Media induces a stroke in the Chinese Pandas and their victims as there is no known fix for infected systems, but to to stay vigilant, not click any links and RTFM keyboard short cuts to open the BitMapped Icons from their Desktop.

The hackers, EN.PUDN.COM.GOLDEN-TSUNAMI.CN, thus presents as a clear and present dangerous to the US infrastructure as the operators divide by 0x0 in 0xC1OOee00, and certainly not the outdated ecosystem all over $ALL major telecomes due to op opaque security practices nobody legally can check them on.

THe US FBI at the J Edna Hoover building declined to comment at this time citing national security, adding Trust Us, we know what we are doing - a policy famous for always working out well throughout history, Hunter Bidens Laptop tells ClueNN.

When asked for evidence that it was Chinese PRC MSS PoC||GTFO hackers and not simply the CIA carding US Citizens in wake of the numerous Heroin, Cocaine, etc. Black Ops Financing scandals, ir a desire to carry plastic and not metric tonnes and all the work fidning. a poor, illiterate colored dude from the ghetto to blame as well as the domestic source supply of plastic from Visa, Amex and Mastercard. as well as rumours Rick Ross is escaped from prison using reading skills rendering the 3 strikes conviction as useless lead-ballons, yet metric tonnes more illegal, illegit and unconstitutional.

The CIA, a state sponsored terror organization (by definition), well known for tactics such as REPLACING STRINGS in Malware and Back door code to blame $everyone else, ClueNN was told:

"$HUNTER_BIDEN_LAPTOP.CHYNEEEESE.MISINFORMATION dis dat and propaganda jazz."

Politely also offering ClueNN a on-the-house NSL gift,. ClueNN Declined the gesture citing reporter code of ethics, which prevents accepting letters, national, secure legal or illegal letters of any kind. ClueNN reports adhere to the stricttest propaganda ethics code, specifically, Freedom to ridicule known liars with a history or less than $ANY_GOD_DAMN_CLUE as it is kind of lulz that the infrastructure of all major carriers seem fully oeprational, without any service distrupttion notice to customers, showing how hackety-hack--hacked the serious vulnerablity not at all overplayed with hyperbole and unfounded wild accusations.

ClueNN tried to reach the NSA in Maryland, only to have US Post return our written request for comments with the code 404. Sources at Microsoft are researching what the code means, but crypto experts said "101 101 101 101" when asked for comments. The US Post Office insist the mysterious code is not a virus, but could not provide further details on what this "number" thing and HTTP RFC Standard is, and where these pens they speak of can be bought.

ATT, declined to comment citing the fact that the FBI went up against MOD 3 times during the 90s for hacking telco infrastructure, abusing their wirless network to stay a step ahead of the FBI due to comcerms that land lines were insecure resulting in reliance on Historically Clearly Super Secure Mobile Phones secured by DES cryptography and industry standard Signal System 7.

ClueNN has received reports MOD was a bunch of long haired hippies, so Offensive nationstate sponsored chiense hackers should be routine for the FBI to fail at.

FBI WARNS TELCO CUSTOMERS OF UPCOMING SS7.CHYNEEESE-SIGNAL DANGERS AS PEPPER.DATSUN-SALOON APT hackers have been accelerating their NOT-DAY attacks on Shit System 7 ver Known.vuln.since.2000 by academics wo have studied the SS7 Manual and ctching the very subtlw lack of $ANY ACL in the secure technology designed in the 1980s.

ClueNN is assured the FBI is actively working with telecoms to unplug their vvulnreable shit and format C: like it is 1997, but declined tocomments on how $old+$outdated infrastructure was not patched the last 5-10-ish years, but insider sources in the hackers news community have told ClueNN the entire globe used a known vulnerable telephone system only known vulnerable 20 years, according to RTFM.MAN, an ancident fountain of hacker knowledge only the most 31337 hackers have access to.

ClueNN will satirically do more drugs as this clearly very serious, situation continues...if only kevin mitnick was here now, but sources say mr Mitnick is taking a seminar called Coding PHP w/ Pico and not getting Pwned by zf0, a group said to be linked to the notorious Ac1dB1tch3z, who as the name implies are on acid, hackers and notorious and therefor to ve considered extremely dangerous.

Anonymous AI.Handles ClueNN has totally spoken to tell us we should expect all the ethernet cables to be unplugged $EONS_AGO due to the severity of the bugs not even close to GSM/2G state - a reference to G-forces pulled only by the most elite fighter pilots as MACH 3, duh.

This has been clearly trustworthy reporting w/ substance, at least as much as the FBI has.

- CLUENN
Clearly not, jaded, fed up and so past taking the US Fucking Banana Idiots propaganda.

On a side note, the group FBI claims is behind the alleged attacks were inside Gemalto a short while ago acccording to Gelato. Errr, Acccording to Gemalto 2 unknown English speaking government intelligence services were inside their networks, not the Chinese PRC or MSS. ClueNN apologizes for any confusion. Gemalto is the global SIM/USIM supplier of "Trust".

I need to train an AI model to just censor propaganda bs from the FBI and other us prpaganda ministries.