My apologies for assuming you were ignorant about ADHD. I agree what I was saying about focus is too simplistic, I was incorrectly thinking you weren't understanding even a simplified explanation of ADHD.

I think it's more accurate to say that the combination of factors that influence attention is different for people with ADHD, with a lot more emphasis on interest and less on other factors. When you say "its something I wish I wanted just to avoid the consequences of being berated, feeling inadequate, etc." - I think most people without ADHD are able to choose to do those things anyways if they decide it is a top priority, and put a lot of effort into it. I have chosen to do those things, tried to put in a lot of effort and energy, to no effect. That's not to say it's even a good idea to be able to do that, but it is a fundamental difference. I've wanted things a lot badder than other people, fought a lot harder for them, and been unable to do them, when I saw other people with very little interest or desire do them easily- and they were even less fundamentally capable of actually doing them, but able to consistently sit down and make progress.

I also agree that what is defined as a psychiatric disorder or disability depends on cultural context- but it's not cultural alone, it's an interaction between the natural variability between people, and the cultural context. Where someone is different mentally in a way they can't control, that causes them to suffer, within the context of a given cultures norms and expectations, that is the origin of all mental disorders. ADHD is a 'different' brain phenotype that isn't fundamentally worse- it also has some serious advantages, and I agree that in a culture where ADHD people were normal, non-ADHD people would be seen to be disabled. They would be seen to have a "flightly" and "shallow" attention that shifts from one thing to another on short intervals, and is too influenced by things like social demands, and not actual interest or passion. People with ADHD are also used to exerting a lot more mental effort to get things done, and build a stronger will as a result. For example, I have a hobby doing competitive strength competitions, and the mental effort I usually expend to get my work done, makes it really easy to push through physically painful and grueling training and competition that other people usually can't do. It's like I'm normally pushing against a wall all day long to no effect, but in this particular activity, I suddenly have no such wall and everything feels easy when it's hard for others.

Those lifestyle factors that influenced your focus, happiness, and motivation level are huge, and are useful tools for people with ADHD. However, there is a counter cultural narrative that those type of things shouldn't matter, and that you should just double down and do your work without worrying about things like that. This narrative might work for some people, but is especially a disaster for people with ADHD, but getting a diagnosis, and getting in a community of people that help each other find tools that work can be an antidote to that. Our culture has a lot of protestant work ethic values - that it is fundamentally morally superior to just do your expected duties, even if, especially if, you really don't want to do them.

I've also had times in my life where I was in a situation where I had a lot of focus and motivation, without any ADHD medication. But I see the effectiveness of these situations as exactly supporting the narrative of executive control dysfunction - if you engineer your environment and situation so less executive control is required to meet your goals, this is a powerful tool for managing ADHD. If you understand ADHD and what factors affect the level of executive control required, instead of happening on good periods in your life just by luck, you can create them consistently. That is, I think a more powerful (but not mutually exclusive) approach than even medication. Consistently having fun, playing, and adventuring in your work and life in general is a very effective ADHD management technique.

Would you summarize your view on ADHD as that it is just a mismatch between some subset of people, and protestant work ethic as a system for motivation? And that, since the protestant work ethic is fundamentally shitty, ADHD shouldn't be seen as a disability? I can agree with that somewhat, but it's of little help to a kid suffering in school. Moreover, I find ADHD treatment to make me better at things I do love. I want to be able to finish projects I start. I want to be able to notice when I'm in a sailboat race that a sail is trimmed wrong, and not hyperfocus on something else.