Honestly speaking I am surprised by the quantity of comments, especially the ones on sexism and similar stuff (how to dress, what to cook, etc). Usually, this is an indicator of one big underlying problem, therefore I assume that it is a problem in the US.

At least, this is how the author positions the situation and her individual case.

But..... in reality, at least based on what I observed in the multinational companies, where I worked, such behavior usually surfaces in three cases.

(1) The person does not understand how organizational dynamics and people/power play works, i.e. does not know the rules of the game.

(2) The person is not a good performer, or at least this is how colleagues perceive her or (for god sake) him.

(3) The corporate environment and culture OR the boss are negative - in this case most employees are treated like that.

Based on my personal experience:-

In case of (3) the best advice is to run - find another company that would value this particular individual strengths. There are plenty of companies out there. The life is not worth it to spend it on converting jerks to mother Theresa.

In case of (2) the best advice is to "make yourself so good, that they can't ignore you" [I do not recall that exact wording]. I seriously doubt that a valuable employee [i.e. she/he is the only one who can fix things with positive/negative impact on P&L] would be mistreated. In case she would be, than probably this is the case (3) - the company/boss does not understand the employee's value ---> same advice as above - run. I recall two cases - female HR assistant and male Director of Strategy. The former was just dumb, and the latter was bullshitting his way around. In both cases gender had nothing to do with the fact that both had nothing to bring to the table. So the consensus of high-producing crowd (both female and male) was unanimous.

Usually, if a person is an excellent performer, these things (negative comments, stupid microtasks, etc) just do not appear or do not stick.

In case of (1) the best advice is to find a mentor (gender not relevant), who could teach or coach on how to behave oneself in a group or organization, so called organizational behavior or simply politics. It is difficult to summarize it, but the goal is to learn how to diffuse negative behavior towards you with humor, words or actions immediately at the point of action in such a way that everybody present would think that the one who initiated negative behavior is a jerk (or dumb, or idiot, or an asshole) without you calling names.

For example a comment from colleague

<"Oop, Katie's got the low cut dress on today! I know where I'm sitting!">

can be rubuffed with

"Oop, John's got his socks smelling today! I know where I shall not be sitting" or smth similar with a big smile.

The simple view and approach is to perceive such people as programs with bugs. To resolve the bug you need to understand how the whole piece is working and what's inside. Therefore, you need to understand each individual, what's inside, what are the bugs and how to approach/address them. Each one is unique and shall be dealt with as such.

Another approach is to start with yourself - how you perceive yourself and own self-confidence.

I agree with OneBytePerGreen that the author shall "lighten up". I do not recall the exact term, but the author perceives that the external environment is what controls her behavior and outcomes. Such view does not faciliate personal growth, or any growth per se. The only way to change is to understand simple fact that behavior of others is defined by your own behavior and start with yourself, because that's the only one a human being can change.

On a side note I especially disagree with one of the comments:
<"Oop, Katie's got the low cut dress on today! I know where I'm sitting!"
Anyone says that at my workplace and they will be shown the door in less than 120 seconds.>

Acting like that is keeping the real issue under the table and unresolved. The real issue is the person's view of the world and lack of knowledge and understanding of how things work in life. A good boss or co-worker would teach or coach the person how to to deal with that.

Apologies for my English and, possibly, tone. My first real post on NH, so I might have missed some 'untold' rules.