(edits made and more details and topics added)

The largest assumption that seems to be behind your position is that society should not have recreational drugs. Is this correct?

not necessarily. as alcohol was/is still very common where i grew up, it doesn't mean that the mere availability is a problem in itself. it was more the attitude about it. but i also suspect that most kids there still had mostly intact families and reasonable role models. all of which can be significant risk factors when missing. effectively the thing is that being a good role model as a parent is something i can influence. maybe with a healthy family responsible use is fine, but for a stressed single parent, the same use becomes a problem, and avoiding drugs or alcohol becomes important to counter the other negative effects from the childrens experience. it's relative, how much risk do we see, and how much do we as parents need to do to reduce that risk.

compared the risks of horseriding with MDMA and found that MDMA was safer

safer for whom? the issue here is that apart from personal injury, horseriding has no side-effects or longterm consequences. it's like flying. on average flying is safe. but if something happens it is usually fatal, therefore we need very strict rules on flight safety. if drug use goes out of hand, like it can become an addiction, the consequences can affect a lot of people. horseriding just doesn't go out of hand, or become addictive. like skiing or some other sports. you just can hurt yourself, that's all.

It could be the biggest cause of drug use is stress; people just trying to cope.

absolutely. i think stress is a huge risk factor. and that's where avoiding drugs and alcohol completely brings its benefits. i am in a stressful situation now, and i find my ways to cope, but because i grew up without alcohol and never tried it before i am not at all tempted to try it now.

the same goes for any potentially addictive behavior like gambling. but since it was mentioned in the initial question, i'd like to talk about phone/internet addiction a bit.

first of all, like horseriding, the side effects are minimal. it becomes more dangerous if you start spending money. i work in IT, so i may have a hard time to distinguish between working hard and being addicted to the internet. maybe i should evaluate how much i participate on hacker news ;-)

now when it comes to educating kids about it, it gets difficult. not using the internet in order to be a positive non-internet using rolemodel becomes practically impossible. more so for me since i work at home. now during school holidays kids see me on the computer all day. i don't know yet how i can teach them to not spend so much time on the computer when i am spending even more time on it.

on the other hand i don't use social media and i can keep my kids from it as well. so that at least reduces the dangers coming from that direction. i also don't let the kids spend money on games. by never even enabling payment options the risk that kids spend money out of control is practically eliminated.

but i don't know what they will do when they get old enough and are able to spend their own money.

> and where we were generally educated in school to avoid that stuff.

I'm uncomfortable because you're trying to make up other people's minds for them.

i want to give kids good rolemodels, and show them that drugs or alcohol are not needed to have a good time. i am not making up their mind, but i am giving them additional information so that they can make up their own mind.

if as a society we want to reduce the number of people affected by alcohol or drug abuse, we need to educate our children to that effect. that's the schools job. to educate according to social consensus. when there is a tendency for abuse to grow if unchecked, then education needs to counteract that. more so if we want to reduce it. of course doing this right also requires relying on facts and true statistics and not allow hardliners to push their agenda by fearmongering and exaggerating the actual damage.

also, you wouldn't jump on a horse or do any other risky sport without proper training. what would be comparable training for alcohol and drug use if not education in school?

Do you allow there could be benefits to recreational drugs used appropriately and in moderation?

i do, but i still believe the risks outweigh the benefits. unlike horseriding where the benefits outweigh the risks, even though statistically there is a higher risk of injury.

approximately nine out of ten soldiers who used heroin in Vietnam eliminated their addiction nearly overnight

i think the key here is that it is very clear what causes the stress, and that being back home that stressfactor is gone and will never come back with 100% certainty.

most of us do not get this certainty. stressfactors reduce, but they never completely disappear, and they may come back any time. people vow to give up drinking, it works for a while, then something happens, and they are back. veterans know that they are done for good, and that they will never have to make that experience again.

if there's one drug I would really like to make illegal it's cigarettes, and I would very, very much like to see the end of all and any advertising of alcohol.

i am fully with you on that. i am also very happy to see that in the past decades we have made progress in creating a smoke free experience in most public indoor areas. and that i see a lot less smoking in public compared to a few decades ago.