Ask HN: Is being a software engineer worth it?
I live in the UK and would love some career advice. My career to date:

- I went from subsidised housing to oxbridge to do a scientific degree. I felt completely out of place there, almost dropped out due to mental health problems, returned to redo a year, and then suffered through to the end of the degree.
- After I graduated, I moved to a place in the north of England to work for a company that creates medical software. This looked like a promising opportunity to me but ended up being a completely toxic working culture; more like a personality cult than a company.
- I then moved to London (where the jobs are) and got a job in the City of London. I had to be pretty independent since there were no real seniors to learn from. After about 4 years, I got to the point where I didn't see any real growth within the job and I had some issues with cultural differences.
- So I went to a mid-range university in a pretty rural area and did a Data Science Masters degree. I generally enjoyed my time there.
- I joined a start-up in Dublin - I thought I might enjoy the environment since they used F# - I mistakenly believed that a place like that might be open to hearing different ideas; maybe I could make a difference? I ended up feeling like I was powerless to influence anything there, and left when I started being bullied by my line manager.
- I played around trying to build my own small start up at the start of the pandemic; I got a little bit of funding to do this, but ended up having to bail out before I could develop the real MVP, or convince any businesses to buy my product.
- So during covid, I joined the civil service to work on a project I believed in; I took a substantial pay cut compared to previous private sector salaries, but I thought it might be worth it if I ended up doing something that felt worthwhile. I found myself in the paradoxical position of my suggestions have often fallen on deaf ears, but colleagues oddly coming to exactly the same conclusions 6 months down the road after they've done a bit of research themselves.

I've handed my notice in on this job because we find it virtually impossible to recruit senior developers (a combination of frustrating bureaucracy and unrealistically low wages); this means I'm expected to plan and execute all of our plans, as well as teaching a team of 5 recent graduates how to do a half-decent job of software engineering. I'm feeling completely worn-out by the bureaucracy and my inability to influence anything.

Maybe this wouldn't be such a problem if I could achieve something in other areas of my life, but inflation in the UK has eaten over 20% of my income over the past couple of years, and house prices in the area I live have increased 41% since 2020. What am I working for?

My question is this:

Is this what work-life is typically like for everyone else? Moving from employer to employer, having such limited influence?

And if it doesn't have to be like this then how can I end the cycle of landing jobs that don't work for me? How can I put my skills to use in an environment where I feel like I have agency and am working on something worthwhile?

But mostly I'm feeling like I've been sold a lie, and I'm wondering what the point of continuing to be a software engineer is.

And before anyone suggests therapy: 9 years and counting.

TLDR: I'm fed up of working rubbish jobs where I don't feel like I'm not doing something worthwhile, or end up being worked like a dog. Have I just had bad experiences? Should I keep doing the same thing hoping for a different result?

Throwaway for obvious reasons.