I have a lot of empathy for these people because losing your dream is painful. But I am also beginning to think that the problem here isn't the AI but our media and culture. So many movies and so many articles (and let's be real here - ones mostly coming out of America) are raising people to believe that you've got to follow your passion (normally acquired during your child or teen years) no matter what and that if you just try hard enough then you cannot fail to make it and everything in your life will fall into place, you dreams will come true, you will be rewarded with money and status and you will become fulfilledTM.

The older I get, the more I think it's ludicrous bullshit. It doesn't seem to affect athletic people as badly as it does people with artistic or scientific dreams, probably because the game is over so much quicker. If your dream is to become a professional athlete and you haven't made it by the time you hit 23 then, for most sports (not all but definitely most), the dream is over. You might feel sad about it and have a period of mourning about that part of your identity but most people seem to get over it pretty quickly and go on to live fulfilling lives. Millions of sports fans pack stadiums world wide to watch their team play and a good majority of them probably dreamed of being on the pitch when they were younger. But somehow they can live contently with that failed dream and carry on enjoying their sport as a spectator.

For some reason, this seems to be harder for people with other dreams to take. Aside from the fact that you might waste a significantly larger chunk of your life chasing the dream only to fail, I wonder if some of it is tied up with the fact that the kids who choose these paths typically aren't the 'cool kids' and so an additional part of them has to deal with the fact that they no longer get to live out the fantasy of finding success in their field and thus getting both their reward and revenge for not being part of the in crowd. It means all their suffering was for nothing.

But it feels to me at least, that if you can get past this pain of not achieving your dream, there is some fundamental wisdom and growth that you earn that people who find success don't necessarily get until later in life, if at all. It's almost like a slice of true peace and confidence similar to going through something horrific and coming out of the other side. It brings you closer to other people because you realise all these stories people are telling themselves about how important all the stuff they're doing is and how incredibly they are is actually bullshit.

So many successful people are insecure and afraid of it, athletes take early retirement to go out on a high rather than come face to face with decline and not living up to their own expectations. I'd argue that some of them carry that insecurity well into their 40s as they struggle to adjust to a life where success in the sport isn't everything. Top business people might not realise it until they get seriously ill and then rethink their lives and start spending more time with family.

Not only that, but even people who are at the top of their game, are still unhappy and end up killing themselves either by their own hand or via drugs and alcohol. So this myth we're peddling, that pursuing your childhood dream as a career will solve all your problems, is clearly not a universal truth.

Yes, it sucks to lose something you love. But it happens to all of us in life at some point or another, be that a job, a house, or a person. The solution is to stop tying our identity and self worth to whatever it is we do to earn money or how big our pile of money is or just any one thing in general. There is nothing stopping this guy/girl from just creating art for their own fun and amusement and putting it out there for their immediate friends and family to see on a website or at a local art exhibition somewhere, just like millions of amateur musicians have no real ambitions to play anything other than their local open mic night. There can be fulfilment in that, especially if your life is also filled with other things such as good friends and family and a job where, even if it wasn't what you dreamed of as a kid, you can still see the value you are adding to your community.