I am similar to you. I am naive and optimistic and take a “I’ll just work more” approach to everything.

The same pattern happens over and over again. I go somewhere, try to do exceptional work, then something changes and I get screwed.

I think you have hit a moment of realization that I hit: “Whenever someone is dangling a carrot in front of you, they are always going to snatch the carrot.”

You have to move past it. The solution is to develop a selfish side. You have to take the mindset that you are going to move onward and upward and that all of these intermediary stages are just temporary.

Don’t believe the stories they are telling you. Everything is actually make believe in business.

It is profoundly unhealthy to become cynical and stop working as hard and stop learning. I view being diligent and reliable and proactive as a form of mental health exercise.

It’s a game just like any other. FAANG is a game, startups are a game. It’s all a game.

And what engineers find out is that the deeper into the game you go, the less writing code matters and the more it’s about understanding the political, business and relationship metagame.

Programmers are just pawns in these systems. They don’t get to decide anything and they aren’t treated like important players. Even though being a developer is touted everywhere, and programming skills are held up with this high regard - it’s actually a lie. Programmers get used up and tossed.

Being useful is important. However, being naive is a big mistake.

I learned not to trust companies ever. To always have my plan B and plan C underway. To not give everything to the company.

Almost all of the tech industry is fake. It is a byproduct of easy money and hype. Some of it more so than others.

I think there is a middle ground between being cynical and being naive. This middle ground is understanding everything is just a game. That playing the game well keeps you healthy and sane (playing it badly will ruin your mental health).

Have one foot in the game and always be looking out for your interests.

With this latest startup. They exploited you. But you should have been exploiting them. Your telling me there was no way for you to use their resources or brand name to advance yourself?

For example, telling the founders you want to develop an AI speciality which you can trade for a higher pay later.

The other problem you have which is the problem I have is I didn’t have an end goal.

Sure you work on startup X. There is a 5% chance that has a big payout. Let’s be honest that is a truly shitty deal.

You need to look at the whole deal. Does it get you a better title, qualitative life improvements such as getting to work from Costa Rica, or maybe you can use it to raise funding for your own startup.

You should have a plan every day of what you plan to do after your current job. And be working on it the entire time.

Never make the mistake of outsourcing your career or life ambition to some idiot founders.

You can exploit them the same way they exploit you. Keep it in the back of your head: Maximize your own interests while playing the game and always have an exit plan or several that lead to a 100% better outcome.