Hey, Sebastian. I agree with some of your remarks here, with regards to such things being used to dismiss someone. I have a serious medical condition and I am open about that here. I am much more discreet about it at work. I tend to feel like people here (and elsewhere) do not really take me seriously and often kind of pat me on the head with the "gosh, you have a moving/touching personal story -- best of luck to you!" kind of stuff but usually aren't helpful to me in a meaningful way which moves my actual goals forward. I tend to get either patted on the head in a condescendingly encouraging manner, like I'm just a cute little girl, or dismissed as full of shit. And that hardly started on HN. HN has actually been a much nicer environment than a lot of other places. A lot of that does relate back to my medical situation and the fact that I am very open about it.

I talk about my medical condition publicly on the web in part because I have a small website where I talk a little about how I got myself well when that is supposed to be impossible. I also have a parenting site where I argue against simply labeling and dismissing my ASD sons. Part of the reason I am much more circumspect about my diagnosis at work is because I feel it can be used to dismiss me and also tends to turn into a circus, where that is all people focus on. So in many ways, I am on your side and agree with you.

On the other hand, I have had the same entry level job at work for five years and have not been promoted. Why? Well, because my medical condition is an actual problem which has put serious limits on my energy levels, ability to focus and so on. As I get healthier, I am being more productive and that has resulted in getting put on a pilot project which may lead to promotion. I have also worked at addressing the many issues my sons have. I find it really hard to talk about in a way that makes a clear distinction between accepting some aspects of my sons as they are without pathologizing it while simultaneously working on getting them healthier and more functional. And I'm very physically tired today, so perhaps will regret posting this as this is a tricky subject to address and I am perhaps not up to doing it justice today.

I've spent a lot of years getting myself well so my performance is not as erratic, I am not so emotionally out of control and so on. I feel I am gradually getting my act together and being taken more seriously. I sometimes wish I could help you somehow do the same. You come across like a blow-hard. I can't figure out what you have actually done, accomplishment-wise (and I've tried, in part because I get so much shit off of people and told I am making up tall tales when I am not, so I am reluctant to jump to conclusions about other people). You go down in flames a lot. Been there, done that. Got crateloads of t-shirts.

I debated writing to you privately about this rather than publicly because I have no desire for you or others to interpret this as a personal attack. But I don't feel I know you well enough to do that and have it go over well. People are often much more vicious in private than in public and my point of view is often wildly misunderstood, so my attempts to initiate private conversations with people has an extremely negative track record, I think because it gets viewed as "something so bitchy she wouldn't own up to saying it publicly". Yeah, I would own up to saying it publicly. I just would rather it not have an audience because I hate how badly audiences often behave, twist my words to support their attacks when that is not my intention and so on.

Anyway, I hope you are having a good holiday. Feel free to dismiss this post as motivated by jealousy of your high karma score. ;-) Peace and good wishes.