>What engineers really need to do is to put more skin in the game. Push for more equity, even if it means accepting a smaller salary.

I disagree strongly. With that plan, (assuming you corrected the problem that most options at pre-public companies are basically revocable at any time.) you'd end up with a bunch of guys like me; Sellswords who are halfway to becoming a business people. And you know? even if you do keep us for a while, it's not going to be for long; my personal policy, when working for other people, is to always be looking, and jump if someone offers me 20% more. Loyalty? you are paying me 20% below market, how about you show me some loyalty.

People like me? we're probably better off running our own companies. Really, if you want the skills people like me have? you are probably best off contracting with our company for the work.

The sort of person who likes to be an employee is, well, rather different. They are usually quite risk-averse compared to someone like me. They don't want to have to worry too much about money; they want to do the job they are interested in, and they want the money problem to largely go away. Generally speaking, unless you want the employee to sell or, you know, be a business person for you? these sorts of people are far superior to people like me, after equalizing for skill.

If you want to keep these sorts of people? offer them raises before they ask. Remove hassles from their lives. help them move. free them from the drudgery of cooking.

In short, I think you need to make them feel like /you/ are loyal to /them/ - that's something they value. Doing this while remaining, you know, honest can be somewhat difficult. I dono. I personally try to continue to give some benefits to ex-employees. I give them free co-location for life. I am generous in references. If I have to get rid of someone, I try to find them another job with someone else. One guy who was a contractor for me for a while who left for a larger ISP, well, he got fired from the new job. I had already replaced him, but I've been helping him out with his resume and stuff.

I think what these people want is to be treated like friends rather than like resources. Which is kinda interesting, because if you deal with someone like me? I mean, sure, being friendly is great. But I'm going to feel flattered, and think of you as a honest and straightforward person if you treat me as a valuable resource rather than as a friend (I mean, in a business context)

Google, I think does a really good job of all of that, and now it sounds like they are also doing a good job of making 'the money problem' just go away.

One of my employees told me that he was recently approached by a google recruiter. He said he felt really guilty, like he was betraying me by going to the interview.

To me? his feelings are rather foreign. I mean, considering the difference between what google would pay him and what I pay him, no reasonable person would criticize him for jumping to google; if anything the reasonable person would say that he had a right to feel a little offended that I'm paying him so little, when according to google, he's worth much more.

But understanding how these sorts of people think and keeping them happy is key to retaining the workers you want long-term. It's a hard thing for a business owner to do, because hey, we're business owners... if we thought that way, we would never have struck out on our own.