> I attend my 1-1 because I have to. I honestly don't get any value out of it.

(I'm a director-level with 4 managers under me and 30 engineers total under them, and I've been managing for ~10 years now.)

Theoretically, 1:1s are YOUR time (not your manager's) to talk about whatever you think is important. If you're going into 1:1s with nothing to say, then it's wasted time and you might as well not have 1:1s. But this is basically 30-60 minutes of dedicated attention from your manager! This is your chance to bring up any topic that you think is worth talking to them about! Yoou have their undivided attention! What's pissing you off about work? What gets you excited? What are your goals?

I always walk into a 1:1 with someone with an agenda in place, but for a report of mine, I let them go first. If they don't have anything to say, then I'll ask questions on their behalf. If they are a high performer, then these questions are often things like "are you happy working on this project?" or "what interests you the most about this project?" or "I've been thinking about this other project that you might enjoy working on."

If they are lower performers, then I'll reframe the conversation around how to improve. "It feels like you're struggling with X. Why do you think that is and how can I help?" or "I've noticed you've been committing code less frequently than normal. Is everything okay?" It only becomes a problem if it drags on with no improvement, but this is the first line of defense for us to level up those low performers.

For me, a 1:1 is my chance to get to know my employee better, and it's their chance to leverage my skill set, influence, and authority. Are you blocked my some other team? I can help! Are you bored with your projects? I can help! Do you hate this other engineer? I can help!

But if they walk into the 1:1 and say "I don't have anything to talk about" and then don't want to play ball with my questions, then there's not a whole lot I can do to help out.

I firmly believe that you don't get what you don't ask for, so if you aren't utilizing your 1:1 time with your boss, then your situation is unlikely to improve.

My 1:1s with my boss often extend closer to the 60 minute mark weekly. These aren't status updates. If my manager doesn't know what I'm doing on a weekly basis, then either I'm not communicating well or they aren't doing their jobs. This is not a status update meeting. I go into my 1:1s with topics designed to solve problems. "I've got this engineer who is struggling. What advice do you have?" or "I"m frustrated by the slowness of IT to ship laptops to new hires. How can we fix this?" or "In five years, I want your job. How do I get there?" and so on.

I've been fortunate in that every boss I've had for the last 10 years has played ball when I say those things. And my most recent boss told the entire org when I left that I was one of his best reports, because I knew what I wanted and I communicated it clearly. He didn't have to guess about whether I was happy or what my goals were -- I knew what they were, and he was able to help me the most out of everyone.

This is your chance to level up with your boss's help. If they won't help, then find a new boss. Easier said than done, but having a boss that has your back is invaluable, and the 1:1 is the place to form that relationship.

I hope you find a new manager that cares about your career progression, your productivity, and perhaps most importantly, your happiness. There are managers like that out there. I wish you the best of luck going forward.