I read others asking for possible advice on where they can go/what they can do for help, and beyond the standard psychologist/psychiatrist, and typical resources linked from others, I'd like to share my experience.

Had depression most of my life, going from irritable depression to standard melancholy depression. Seen a handful of psychologists, and wished they worked. As mentioned in the article, it takes an enormous amount of time to get someone else 'up to speed' on you, your history, your proclivities, and your hypothesizes. I did it a few times, but had mixed experiences. Still think psychologists are a very good resource, its just takes time to find a good one.

During treatment, I tried a multitude of the standard anti-depressants, which merely masked the symptoms for myself. For others, these options work much better.

After being frustrated from my last therapist, I decided to dive into the research, and self-experiment. After 5 or so years, the following has helped immensely. I still have my lows, but they feel normal, and expected:

* Exercise: My constant irritation against those that just wanted to help, made it hard to let them in. So my anger and resentment was turned to weight lifting, and focusing on muscle building. I tend to overthink, so this was a good way to still continue to analyze, but also tire me out into a meditative-like state. The key for me was not to just go through the motions of the workout (though some days that's all I did), but to feed into that primal urge for aggression, put on intense workout music (mine was heavy rock), and exert as much energy into defeating my sets as possible. I agreed to do 10 reps for this last set? F-that, I'm doing 12. Nope 14. (within reason)

* Food: If you've read my past comments, you'll know I eat carnivore. This isn't to proselytize the diet, though it has had the largest positive impact on my emotional well being compared to anything else. Rather, its to point out that diet plays a key role. If you're eating something that's inflammatory to your gut, your emotional state may be the victim. This isn't the case for all instances of depression, but the research is mounting [0][1] Though these resources contradict my attitude towards many (not all) plants, the point is find what diet is right for you, even to at least eliminate that possibility. For me, if I stray into a problematic food, I am intensely depressed for at least a day or more, reminding me of what I worked to 'cure'.

* Time to yourself: As others have pointed out, meditation is great. So is yoga (especially hot yoga, if you like a challenge). Start slow, but what I've found for myself is that as my self-discipline increases, my confidence and mood do as well. From normal yoga, to 80 degree, to 95 degree, the challenge and (enjoyable) 'pain' in the moment, leads to a euphoric bliss of calmness after.

* Sun: Vitamin D deficiency is shown to have many issues related to depression, immune health and others. Depending on where you live, and how much melanin you have, you may need more than you think. Spend time outdoors during sunny periods (without sunscreen) for a time that's appropriate (you'll have to test yourself to find your optimal amount). Ask your doctor for vitamin D tests on a regular basis, so you have data to test your hypothesis.

* Socializing: Introvert or extrovert, some communication (whether in person or over the web) is generally seen as a positive thing for many. At times I didn't want to interact with anyone, as I would just hate my own existence, and their happiness as well. So in times like those I'd join forums or play games with people online. Something to get out of your own head. Or immerse yourself in a book, 'socializing' with the characters.

Hope this helps someone, I understand all too well the deep, endless darkness that is depression. It's always lurking around the corner, and sometimes I forget how bad it is, until I slip up. But there is a way out, it just has to be your way.

[0] https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/diet-and-depression-2018...
[1] https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/food-and-mood-i...