I'm happy to share, mental health carries a stigma and it should fucking not... it was really hard for me to seek treatment, I thought about it for years, but the social stigmas [1] kept me from seeking help.

At first, I was given anti-depressants, because if you're very depressed sometimes things like starting/stopping projects is difficult (looks like ADD/ADHD). Also, most ADD medicine is heavily regulated; so, they pretty much put you through a gamut to make sure it's what's actually yer problem. At first this sort of felt like they weren't listening to me, but I do appreciate it now reflecting back (mostly because most health care professionals do want to help you, if you're in a bad place mentally though, it can be hard to realize).

I was at the time suffering pretty horrible depression due to a very bad couple of years; so, it made sense, and it helped my mood-- I didn't feel hopeless but it didn't really resolve my underlying stress of never being able to focus or finish anything (which was pretty deeply affecting me because I wanted to contribute more to my team, or rather more steadily).

After two or three months on anti-depressants, and checking in monthly, I was prescribed a pretty small dosage of Adderall; though, if my insurance was better for mental health I would have tried Vyvanse (I think is what its called). Since the dosage was low after about the first week or so, it would kind of wear off after like four hours... So, after the first month I asked to have it doubled and have been at that dosage since with no issues or complaints been about eight months now.

I've read and hear about a lot of people who sort of have enhanced ADD on drugs like Adderall and I haven't really experienced that at all, with the exception of a couple of days I was battling a lot of sadness. Which is why I think my mental healthcare provider did a really great job addressing it (my depression) first; so, that my ADD could actually be treated.

[1] It's really shitty to have mental health issues because almost everyone tells you to: try "diet X," that you have some bad habit, or that you don't do "Y or Z." If you had a physical injury though, no one is going to say "stop eating sugar to fix it." It's not that some diet, exercise , etc might be helpful, just like it would be to prevent a physical injury), sure... thanks hindsight-man.

By doing that what you're telling someone is: that their problems are completely within their control, that they are to blame, and it's their fault because they're choosing this for themselves. When in truth they cannot control it and should not feel blame or inadequacy for it.

Over the years to treat my ADD I tried:

1. Gluten free

2. Exercise

3. Keto

4. Smoking Weed

5. Not Smoking Weed (went a year without it, didn't help, actually made my ADD worse and I got fat(ter))

6. Vitamins of all fucking kinds

7. Cutting coffee/caffeine out

8. Steady sleep schedule

9. Various other weird "natural" shit too I'm sure

None of it helped but each thing on that list prolonged me from getting help [2].

[2] Having never suffered from that kind of depression before I can honestly say it was a heavy fog, that slowly rolled over my life, that was impossible for me to recognize until I was treated for it. If anyone else out there finds themselves angry or upset in ways that don't reflect who they feel they once were, get help, friend. Depression isn't just about being sad.