Part III

One more big, huge point so far omitted here: I want to be short and clear and don't want to be crude, but in simple terms human females are herd animals. They are desperate to join groups, mostly of other females, and to be in the center of those groups, receiving approval. Then they feel MUCH more secure. If they can be the leader of such a group, then they can feel even more secure; so, they are social climbers. Yes, they are very cooperative within their groups and very competitive outside their groups: One of their main means for both is gossip. As in D. Tannen, gossip, especially expressing emotions, is how they form group bonds. Cell phones? Social media? Gossip -- female bonding. Hackers form bonds by sharing work (ever hear of open source?); women, sharing emotions!

For little girls and pink dresses, big skirts, puffy sleeves, flimsy and, thus, delicate cloth, pastel colors, tied up with ribbons and bows, a standard explanation is: Children are just desperate for adult competence, that is, want to grow up. Little girls quickly realize that they are little versions of Mommy, and boys, Daddy.

Ever look at pictures of girls and young women, just the faces, without clues to age from hairstyle and makeup, and try to guess the age? Tough to do, ain't it? E.g., Elizabeth Taylor was born in 1932; if just look at her face, JUST her face, in the 1943 'Lassie Come Home' and in the 1951 'A Place in the Sun', darned tough to say how many years are between them. Why? Mother Nature has arranged, the way her face is endearing at age 7-10 is much the same as at age 17. Net, Mother Nature wants her to be endearing and to have her husband care for her much (but not exactly!) like her father did.

The Claudette Colbert character had been very carefully cared for by her very strong father; then she expected the same from her new husband, the Henry Fonda character. To her that log cabin didn't look much the same, and that Indian friend was the last straw! Her emotions had her sense that she wasn't being cared for, and she went hysterical. Rationally Fonda knew that that Indian friend was GOOD to have; emotionally Colbert went hysterical. Actually, what she did was self-destructive; the level 102 course goes into that, but I omit it here (hint: It can create dependency and, thus, have reproductive advantage).

Remember the Dr. Carol Nadelson, "Traditional marriage is about offspring, security, and caretaking". A human female is supposed to be CARED FOR, first by her father and then by her husband. In particular, she is not supposed to be out there, on rationality and little more, facing dangers, taking big risks, being the first in something very new and different in information technology entrepreneurship. Mother Nature was there LONG before Silicon Valley. Sorry 'bout that.

Or, we shouldn't forget the old psychology experiment of the wire mother and the cloth mother. Well, a mother in lots of soft, flowing cloth is much closer to the cloth mother; a mother dressed up in a navy suit and carrying a leather brief case into a tall glass and aluminum office building is much closer to the wire mother. Guess which one will be the stronger limb on the tree, what good mommies will be more like, and, thus, what little girls will want to be like.

So, how does a girl of 3-4 get interested in pretty, pink dresses? A woman who is a mommy has likely strongly followed at least some of the standard patterns. So, a little girl sees from Mommy and other mothers and other little girls what little girls should look like and, thus, wants pretty, pink dresses.