Last two years I followed r/fi obsessedly like it's a life philosophy. Holy hell did it work well.

As a result of it, I did extremely well financially even with my very little income as a grad student. I've achieved my saving goals for the year 4 months in. But I've grew to much pride, lost my sanity, became numb, lost my sense of enjoying life. Perhaps that was part of the reason my wonderful girlfriend broke up with me. By the way, I lived in a small Midwest town. I lived frugally and minimally and I'm not really obsessed with things in the first place, so saving 50% of my income being single wasn't hard. I woke up everyday checking my investments and saw it growing but felt no joy. Sometimes I would stay in bed for the whole day and sleep. I wasn't rich but I was so financially stable that I was going to be alright no matter what happens.

Thanks to several changes in life, I now do feel joy again. I don't know what exactly went right, but I did the following:

- Not obsessedly following the r/fire community anymore. I now spend more money to buy gifts and experiences for people I love (not superficial ones, the kind of I would have to think twice buying for myself). I come up short financially but ahead in my sense of self worthiness. I feel I'm not a money obsessed scumbag anymore. You might find having a better time doing this because I don't have a big income. But anyway, try to make other people who are important in your life happy for what you can provide: money, time, experiences and you won't regret it.

- I started working out hardcore first because the girlfriend that dragged me to the gym. FYI, I am a typical computer nerd, who was massively unfit (underweight) and has never played a sport in my life. Nowadays, I try to work out once or twice a week. Just having a trainer train you for the first week so you know what is what is enough for you to get started.

- I moved to the coast, not that I planned to. I live in a much nicer place with more freedom and amenities. There is a huge difference in living in an intellectual and welcoming town compared to the middle of nowhere, homophobic town.

- I quit social media cold turkey. I don't have Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, almost anything that allows me to peek into the others' lives anymore. I probably won't ever come back to Facebook.

- I started to think positively about others: seeing what they were able to achieve given the situation, not how inferior they are to me. And I told everything to them to make them feel they share with a friend.

- I watched the highest rated movies on imdb. Perhaps the two that resonated the most with me (those were rewatches!) were sunset blvd and groundhog day. Especially groundhog day. You are in a loop and everyday is the damn same. It changes when you see it differently that kind of stuff. I have never found watching fictional movies and books useful or joyful before. I have always been a nonfictional person.

- I started to be more bold, adventurous and reached out and collaborate with people I admire. We work and talk about projects that makes us no money. But I can't say how much I love seeing a personal email from people telling me about new things they're planning to do.

I know not everything I said will be applicable for you, but I hope at least some of those you might find something useful. Good luck and I hope you feel better for the new year!