A. Fewer words, more action or pictures. You've heard this already.

B. Wordsmithing. You need a copy editor, with a degree in English or its moral equivalent, to go over every line of this with you. Let's take apart just the third sentence:

Probably depends on how good of a designer you are!

"How good of a [X]" is a very awkward phrase in print. It might work in very casual spoken English, but in print it looks amateurish. Starting a sentence with "probably" is likewise too casual. Your customer base is made of designers. They often care about such details.

You should also consider avoiding the exclamation point. Heed the words of Elmore Leonard: "You are allowed no more than two or three exclamation points per 100,000 words of prose."

Now, having marginally improved the sentence by changing it to something like:

It probably depends on how talented a designer you are.

...you should delete this sentence altogether, because it is an awful sales pitch. You are, literally, questioning the skill of your prospective customer. Let me translate this opening:

If people aren't paying you $200 to $500 to design simple things, you probably suck!

Guess what? Your prospective customer is probably not currently being paid $200 to $500 for custom Facebook pages. If your customer already knew how to build these pages, he or she would not be shopping for your product. So your opening pitch can be further distilled to:

Dear customer: You suck!

Ouch. Get the whole thing off the page and replace it with something more like this:

Customers will pay you $200 to $500 for custom-designed Facebook pages, and you can build them in minutes with this tool.

Only with fewer words.

C. For a product that offers to simplify a complicated process, the home page looks awfully complicated. Too much technical jargon. Don't write things like this:

Forget about learning XFBML, FBML, FBJS, FQL.

You are trying to convince your customer that they need not learn or even think about these acronyms. So don't name-drop them. That's like trying to sell a Caribbean vacation by saying:

Forget about sharks, food poisoning, skin cancer, or pickpockets.

Make the prose on the page be as easy and soothing as the product is meant to be. Speak to your audience. Don't use any technical terms except those that your customers need to know: "HTML" and "CSS". If a subset of your customers needs to know about the XFBML, put it in the FAQ.

D. The name. I hate to have to say it, it's like picking on someone's kids, but "A Plan Of Attack" is not a good product name. It doesn't suggest Facebook, it doesn't suggest design, it doesn't sound like the name of an application or product, it contains too many words, and it starts with an "A" which will turn your word-of-mouth recommendations into an Abbott and Costello sketch:

A: "What should I use for my simple Facebook pages?"
B: "'A Plan Of Attack'"
A: "Which plan of attack?"
B: "No, that's a spreadsheet. Use 'A Plan Of Attack'"
A: "Did you even hear my question?"
B: "Third base!"

E. A/B testing. Clearly you should not accept my word for any of this. I have no idea how to sell your product. All I have are hypotheses. So be sure you have a method for testing and winnowing hypotheses.

Good luck! If I ever need a custom Facebook page I will be sure to try your product.