My landlord just raised my rent. I could use some money. Can I have your phone number so that I can text you and ask you to call my landlord, tell her what a good person I am, and lower my rent?

My God, never in a million years would you agree to it.

Why?

Because you don’t care about my problems. But I’m supposed to care about yours. Why?

Because you’re you. Look at your responses. “I don’t care about your problems, but you should care about mine.”

Typical. Humans are born naricissists, and they stay that way for life mostly.

Once upon a time, there was a saying. It was “the customer is always right.”

My how things have changed.

Now, it’s “the customer is always wrong.” Look at you. You care nothing about what the customers want. You don’t listen and adapt.

If enough customers are giving you 1 star because they don’t like nags, and enough are doing it to effect you, those customers are telling you something. You’re a fool if you don’t listen.

If not enough are doing it to effect you, then you don’t have a problem.

If every dev that nags gets a one star, then it’s a wash for you. Why are you leaving all of these facts out? Nobody is suggesting ONLY 1-staring you. They’re suggesting 1-staring everyone. You don’t lose anything in such a scenario. Except, those who don’t nag will rise higher in the ratings, and you’ll be here screaming about how you “have to nag because that’s how the system is weighted.” Whether or not you use it as a competitive advantage or not is up to you, although let’s face it, you blame us regardless of what you do.

Listen, you have problems. I have problems. We all have problems. My problems aren’t your problems, and yours aren’t mine. Grow up, handle your business, and do it without asking other grown adults to do things for you for free. We’re not your parents. We don’t do things because you’re our special little boy. You don’t do them for us either.

You’re an adult now, and that’s the way it works.

Or, do what you want, and accept the consequences, which you’ve already been appraised of. Sure, you can throw up a middle finger if you’d like, keep bombing the customers, then periodically cry “It’s sooooo unfaaaaair”. Maybe you’ll get sympathy.

For my part, I’ve never given one-star for ratings nags, but I will now. In fact, I’m going to give 10 one-stars as soon as I leave this page.

I’ve put money into every app that’s been on my device for more than a month, and I’ve been ripped off along the way … devs changing paid to freemium and throwing ads all over apps I’ve paid for, devs dropping support and releasing “new” versions the next day, dev taking the cash and keeping the ads in the product … you’re all barely better than swindlers these days, and some of you aren’t better at all.

Let’s face it. You could not care less. You’re busy worrying about you. I’m supposed to put all of my experience aside, and think about you. Your wants. Your needs. Oh why won’t the customers think of you, the selfish bastids!

Manipulating the ratings is nonesense too, and the way you justify your behavior to yourself is such a narcissitic endeavor that it’s humorous. At leats be honest with yourself. Yeah, like you admit, you manipulate things to your advantage, but we’re supposed to do the same. Manipulate things to your advantage. You You YOU. If it benefits you, you find a way to justify it, if it benefits someone else, eh, screw em and their wants.

And now, I read that we’ve been stealing your apps, and using them for free, and gosh darnit, we’re so selfish that we don’t stop what we’re doing and rate your app 5 stars to make your lives better like your parents used to do for you whenever they were asked.

Yeah, now I actually dislike the nag devs, because I got just a little bit of insight into what they’re thinking, and oh, wouldn’t you know it … it’s “me me me me me”.

“But that’s what the customers do! Think about themselves!”, you’ll surely respond, without realizing that, YEAH, they’re supposed to. The customers are suppose to be the selfish people of the transaction. I can just imagine you being a waiter, standing around complaining “bring me some food, refill my drink, all the customers do is think of themselves!” You’re supposed to serve the customers, genius, not the other way around. The customer is there to serve themselves, and you’re there to serve them.

If you don’t like it, then boy are you on the wrong side of the transaction.

And hey, I’d still like that number if you don’t mind. You can never have to many people to ping when you have a problem, and if you wouldn’t mind me pinging you for some help every now and then, I’d certainly appreciate it.

Come on, it’ll only take a few minutes of your time every other month. Me needing help is the way the world is designed. Don’t blame me, blame the system.