It's true that this is the situation for so many young women out there, as it has been for me. There seem to be no more 'gentlemen' - just men who want to use you and be loved and appreciated because they are men. This includes engaging in mean and selfish behaviour, substance abuse and blaming of others without examining their own actions. You have to dose yourself with birth control to avoid getting pregnant with a partner who you aren't sure you could rely on to be there for you if you did, even though you have been together for years. And then you break up and they are off to find another woman who will put up with the poor treatment. However, rather than the transactional kind of male/female relationship that Wente describes where women offer up sex in exchange for material security, I have always dreamt of a deep friendship and love in a romantic relationship, where there are shared interests and a simple enjoyment of being together. I've found this with a woman - but not a man.

Labels: moderation: safe