found hotel , changed clothes , applied sunscreen.first order of business : lunch , as i am a crabby bitch without food . looooved ( hah ) the maitre d ' duty of accosting passers - by in the streets . also i am a big big fan of all the nasty stray cats milling about near the outdoor tables . eeewww .

Question: Why is the narrator so dour despite being on vacation ?
Answer: The narrator has lost their luggage .The narrator lost her ID .The narrator is experiencing a stomach bug .The narrator is famished .