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F.A.Q.

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FILE INFO

You are viewing External Document 5495, point of origin EXTORG-002, 'The Foundation'. File has been shared with PTOLEMY Command in order to facilitate mutual cooperation following cleanup of LTE-5495.
Statements of suspect have been highlighted in blue — hover over them to view attached results from the PSYCHE investigation.

PTOLEMY COMMAND
UNGOC

2/5495 LEVEL 2/5495
CLASSIFIED

Item #: SCP-5495

Neutralized

Structural diagram of SCP-5495.

SPECIAL CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES
SCP-5495 has been airlifted to Site-341 and is undergoing reverse-engineering and investigation into its anomalous effects. Access is restricted to L4/54952.

Description
SCP-5495 is a component of a nonfunctional paraweapon, constructed by the Organization for the Reclamation of Islamic Artifacts (ORIA). The particular nature and mechanics of SCP-5495 are under study, but is understood to have ontokinetic effects on nearby individuals, items, and locations. Alone, SCP-5495's effects are variable, violent, and uncontrollable; it is theorized that the rest of the weapon provides a focusing aspect, allowing the weapon to be directed and effectively utilized.
Physically, SCP-5495 is a steel cylinder 0.5m long and 0.25m wide, capped at both ends with discs of beryllium-bronze, weighing 20kg. Its internal composition is The cause for this expungement is filed under "sensitive information".[REDACTED].
See PSYCHE Investigation Item Charlie.ORIA denies any knowledge of SCP-5495 or the rest of the components. Further investigation is discouraged to preserve their already-strained diplomatic relationship with 'Western' anomalous organizations.
SCP-5495 was discovered in 1990 following reports of anomalous ontokinetic activity in Andar, a small village in Ghazni, Afghanistan. Activity reported was a variety of ontokinetic effects, including but not limited to spontaneous generation of entities, memory alteration, landscape alteration, biological mutations, sudden ontokinetic ability, etc. The latent ontokinetic contamination produced by SCP-5495 affected the villagers who had removed SCP-5495 from its unsecured storage facility unaware of its effects or purpose, likely to sell it for scrap, and resulted in these anomalies.

Timeline
Origin
Due to ORIA's lack of cooperation, little is definitively known about SCP-5495's origins. It is theorized to have been in construction since at least 1980, under orders by the military leadership, presumably to be used in the Iran-Iraq War. Whether the weapon was never finished or was used and then disassembled is similarly unclear; what is known is that by August of 1990, SCP-5495 was residing in "Qardū" does not appear on any ORIA facility listings available to PSYCHE, though this could be indicative of its secrecy. Accusation of illegal quartering is curious — Afghan-Iran relations pre- and post- Revolution make an ORIA outpost a reasonable possibility.an abandoned ORIA storage facility codenamed "Qardū", (illegally) located in Nawa, Ghazni Province, inside Afghani borders.
Removal from Qardū
On August 14th, Jamsheh Behzadi, 27, discovered the entrance to Qardū several kilometers from his family homestead. ORIA facilities generally tend toward more esoteric security involving Type-Blue energy.The metal entry door was rusted shut, so he noted the location and resolved to return with assistance.
On August 15th, he returned with his cousin Farhad Behzadi, 19, and a friend from the nearby village of Andar, population 598— Abdullah Hashem, 21. Using tools taken from Hashem's father, the group broke the seals on the door and entered the two-room facility, believing they had stumbled upon a Odd accusation, but entirely possible for young rural men — question arises on how Foundation Interviewers discovered this knowledge.Pakistani military outpost. They discovered it to be deserted and empty, save for several padded crates containing nonperishable food, ammunition, and one specially padded crate containing SCP-5495, found by Farhad:

We were so stupid. Idiot teenagers playing explorers, completely clueless as to what we'd walked into. If I could reach through time just once, I would gladly use it to go back and tell the three of us to turn, to run, far far away.
I was the first one to see it, you know. Jamsheh was amazed by the machine-gun bullets and the military food, and I pried open the other crate, shoved so far into the corner. The place was so dimly lit and dusty… it had the distinct air of some place that had been forgotten. When I cut the locks and Farhad looked inside, I saw the strange metal thing, and he laid a hand on it - he said it was warm in the center and cool at the edges - we felt like we had discovered something miraculous! None of it knew what it was, of course — Jamsheh was going to the capital in a few weeks to visit some friends at the university, he said he would take it up then and figure out if it was worth any money, and he would split it among us. We were so stupid.

The group loaded SCP-5495 and the ammunition and food into a wheelbarrow and carted it to Hashem's house in the village, where they decided it would be stored to avoid scrutiny from the Behzadi parents until Jamsheh took it to Kabul.
At the time they parted ways, it is likely that Farhad was the only one contaminated due to his direct inhalation of the Few directed paraweapon concepts would vent into the surrounding air.stale, contaminated air in the container.
Core Exposure
By August 17th, Hashem had sold most of the ammunition, earning a considerable profit for the area. He investigated SCP-5495, hoping to find some clue as to its purpose or design; he discovered a small aperture in the side of Polarized glass is far too brittle to be used in a weapon core and is generally reserved for scientific equipment.polarized glass, and attempted to shatter it — poor storage conditions had left the other primary seals degraded to the point of uselessness. He succeeded in exposing the internal core of the device — while the device had already begun latently lowering the local reality level, the destruction of the seal increased the efficiency of this process twofold. Disturbed by his damaging of the device, he quickly put it away and did not unearth it until the day after. However, direct contact to the internal core likely meant he was already exposed to an overwhelming dosage of The cause for this redaction is filed under "sensitive information".[REDACTED].
At the Behzadi household, Farhad had already fallen ill the afternoon after his discovery of SCP-5495. By the evening of August 18th, he was bedridden and complaining of aching pains and nausea. This was thought to be a result of food poisoning. His older sister, Raazyah Behzadi, 20, was his primary caretaker:

His room felt so strange. I came in every hour or so with water and to check on him, he was just rolling around in his sheets, drenched in sweat. His room felt like it was much larger than it was, kilometers long, but I could move across it one step. It's hard to explain, but it just didn't feel quite real.
In hindsight, what should have told me it was something unnatural, though, was the rat. I woke up to sounds of retching, like he was choking on something. I opened the door and looked in, I thought he would be vomiting and then he would be fine. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, eyes wide. I asked what was wrong and he just pointed to a grey spot on the floor - a rat, I realized. Grey and wet with moisture, dead on its back. I figured he had just killed the rat, though rats aren't very common here, and closed the door. It never occurred to me that the rat was wet with spit.

Through taking care of Farhad, Raazyah was similarly exposed to Only the most reckless of paraweapon concepts would use latent Type-Green energy as a transmission vector — carries a large risk of friendly fire.latent ontokinetic energies in his system from his primary exposure to SCP-5495. The secondhand nature of her contamination was weakened enough to manifest as little more than idle shifting that lasted for a few seconds at maximum.
By August 18th, Hashem, Farhad, Raazyah, and their parents Hussein and Latifa were contaminated.
Instability
On August 19th, Jamsheh went down to Hashem's home to investigate SCP-5495. Hashem was absent at the time, selling the remainder of the ammunition and food, and Jamsheh discovered the aperture, which had been leaking ontokinetically-unstable radiation at an increased rate for the entire night into the surroundings — including into the store of food that Hashem would wake up to sell in the morning to the rest of the village. This incident resulted in the contamination skyrocketing from ~4 cases at the time to ~300, well over two-thirds of the village population. Theoretically possible, if contrived.The ingestion of contaminated food imbued individuals with uncontrollable ontokinetic abilities that, while individually minor, were greatly amplified by SCP-5495 degrading the reality-stability of the region. Reports of widespread sickness increased as suspicions grew that some sort of plague had descended upon the village, accompanied by rumours of witchcraft or some divine punishment being cast upon the citizens.
Jamsheh's investigation included using a saw and bolt cutter to Extremely unlikely that a weapons-grade reality core could be disassembled by one individual with primitive tools.remove a piece of SCP-5495's casing and peer inside. The removal of the casing quadrupled the speed of reality-degradation by exposing significantly more of the core substance. Jamsheh himself almost instantly received a massive overdose, likely causing No feasible explanation for how Foundation investigators were able to infer this level of detail without experience.rapid warping and distortion of physical structure and composition, followed by a sudden return to normality, resulting in massive internal trauma, destruction of bones and organs, failure of conception, and internal liquification. It is unclear whether Jamsheh died as a result of this, or survived in a semi-real state until August 20th. Meanwhile, spontaneous reality failures were occurring in the homes of other villagers:

I think that was the most scared I've ever been in my life. I was sitting at the dinner table with Amir and Papa, and… I asked someone to pass the dish. Amir reached out, and everything just… shook. Like the world was buzzing with violence. It only lasted for a split second, but I could tell Papa felt it too, because I saw him make a face. Then Amir touched the dish and it turned into a dead cow, trussed up and bleeding from skewers, then Mother, then Najibullah3, and then Amir, all in a second. He screamed, so did I, and Papa asked us why we were shouting, and we saw nothing had happened at all.
I know what I saw. A glimpse of what was to come.

The reality level of the village had already fallen to dangerous lows, and the density of ontokinetically-capable individuals rapidly increasing resulted in a full collapse of consensus reality on August 20th.
Collapse
In the early morning of August 20th, Farhad Behzadi died in his bed. However, the local area of destabilized reality caused by his contamination resulted in his corpse rising and going about the house in a jerking, puppet-like gait and speaking to the rest of the family. This illusion faltered when the corpse, still subject to physical decomposition, succumbed to rigor mortis, and collapsed in the middle of the kitchen during breakfast with his parents and Hashem — no one had discovered Jamsheh's body, and Raazyah had gone into town to get groceries. Upon the realization that Farhad was and had been dead, the collective ontokinetic potential of Hussein, Latifa, Hashem, and Farhad's corpse was unleashed in an emotional rage that is believed to have set off an explosive chain reaction — when villagers in Andar saw the Behzadi homestead at the corona of a blinding explosion of color, their panic and fear involuntarily activated their abilities, forming a positive feedback loop. Eyewitness accounts of this are extremely difficult to separate from ontokinetic creations and hallucinations, but a general image can be gathered:

It was exhilarating.
The worst thing I have ever lived through, inarguably. I was in the mountains when the Russians invaded and when they pulled out, I lived through the fighting and the shelling and the Talibans. This was a fresh kind of agony.
I saw my house be stripped away layer-by-layer like a cow being skinned, exposing the sinewy skeleton inside. My family became a series of giggling explosions, mortar shells frozen midway through detonating. They danced around my head as the sun came up and back down, a thousand times in a second. The ground was much too far away, but I could feel my toes touch it before my toes stopped being there. I was a series of blocks and rods, then calligraphy, then the goat I kept as a child. I could see in all six directions and all my neighbors, friends, families, all were doing the same thing. It went on for days as my home, the home of my parents and their parents and their parents before them, just…. fell apart, in front of our very eyes, because there was never really anything holding it together at all. We were all just there, living out some unreal personal Hell.
Or Heaven, maybe. I'm not too sure.

Intervention
At this point, a Foundation source in the district's police force became aware of the events transpiring in Andar, and submitted an investigation advisory. One of these agents was an embedded GOC sleeper agent, who alerted Regional Command to a likely Type-Green PTE on-location.Two agents from Kabul were dispatched to the village, arriving in a Jeep:

Well, it was a nightmare, wasn't it? A disaster. It was like a surrealist warzone. Most of the mud-and-clay houses had been properly destroyed, reduced to some wet purple cubic substance that only resembled rubble. The village square was, I remember, the distended and taffy-stretched bodies of a man and his wife laying next to themselves, on and on and on into the infinite horizon. Then I took a step and I was past them. I'm still not sure whether the- the corpses had been vastly multiplied in on themselves or whether I was being looped around and around the town. The sky was a peculiar shade of water, and the water… well, I think that's not relevant.
My point is that it was horrible. I know it sounds like I'm being cavalier, but that's because.. it's one of those things that you see and you just… don't quite process it, your brain decides you'll be more effective if you just maintain a layer of disconnect with your surroundings. A dissociation of necessity. A lot of the details are faded, now, but I remember one thing - a light, soft hissing coming from everywhere all at once, barely perceptible over the fires and the intense bum-ba-bum and the sounds of a bleeding ground.
A very quiet and a very strained screaming.

Agents retreated from the village, reporting the situation to the field office in Kabul, which relayed it to Site-34. Tactical Response Team Romeo-Nine "Sandstorm" was discreetly deployed to establish a containment cordon and assess the situation. Officers equipped with Kant counters determined the location was in a state of dramatically unstable and shifting reality, and authorized the aerial drop and activation of a Mobile Scranton Reality Anchor from a CH-47 Chinook. The MSRA landed in the village center and began functioning, allowing Romeo-Niner to move in and secure the area shortly before the Assessment Team 0296 "Clay and Fire", followed by Strike Team 0995 "Dune Demons".arrival of Global Occult Coalition forces.
Cleanup
Of a population of ~450, 98 survivors were rescued by the Foundation, the vast majority suffering from some form of reality-manipulated syndromes, including but not limited to: expulsion of living mammals, substitution of blood and organs with mundane household objects, fractally infinite bodies, altered conceptions of self, base identity and body changes, a litany of mental issues (anomalous and non-anomalous), and spontaneous implosion. While the abilities were much more limited in scope following the enforcement of consensus reality on the region and the resulting smaller Hume differential, they were still considerable and numerous.
Kant counters tracking the epicenter of the collapse of reality found two points of note; the location that had once held the Behzadi household and the Hashem household. The former had been entirely annihilated; the house and property had simply vanished, leaving behind a low, wide crater containing Hashem, Raazyah, and Hussein all in shock and suffering from acute paralysis in addition to the ontokinetic effects of the others. Farhad's body had, according to the group, 'not become', and taken his mother with him.
The Hashem household led to the discovery of SCP-5495 as the root cause of the incident, as well as of the liquefied remains of Jamsheh Behzadi. Type-Green and amnestic treatment were used to gradually return surviving victims to a state of normality as possible. Due to classified methods, GOC troops were not allowed on-site for the duration of the Foundation occupation, to much consternation.
The approximate timeline above was constructed using testimony from the surviving actors prior to amnesticization4.

Conclusion
The events caused by SCP-5495 have resulted in significant damage to the lives of all individuals involved, whether they survived or not. The more harshly-affected individuals were unable to be returned to normality and have surrendered themself to humane Foundation containment as Persons of Interest. They will be provided medical care for the duration of their lives. All corpses and bodies pulled from the rubble of Andar have been cremated where possible and otherwise destroyed. The ashes and remains are stored at Site-34 in the same isolation chamber as SCP-5495 itself, in telekill-lined steel urns. It is believed the latent ontokinetic properties of the remains will This degree of estimation is beyond current science available to PTOLEMY Research and Development; indicated the Foundation either has a significantly more advanced understanding of anomalous sciences than previously thought, or have previous experience with this degree of Type-Green contamination. not entirely subside to negligible levels for another 150 years at minimum:

I don't know why this happened. Divine punishment, making us Sodom and Gomorrah to teach Lut's wife a lesson. Supernatural, witchcraft, something. I don't know. I know that I'm never going to be able to visit the graves of my family and that's someone's fault. I don't even know if I want them to pay, but I want them to know what they did.
Just hurry and make me forget like the others.

While ORIA is generally spiteful of perceived Western judgement, historically they prefer to exercise an almost excessive degree of caution in all activities.The recklessness and negligence of ORIA in adequately storing and disposing of their parawaste has caused catastrophic damage and loss of life for uninvolved civilians. However, due to ORIA's complete denial of any involvement in the events, retaliatory action or exigent investigation is inadvisable at best.

PSYCHE ITEM CHARLIE

The following encoded communications were intercepted at Foundation Site-34 by a deep-cover PSYCHE Special Observer.

| 09031990████Z
| ENCODED TRAFFIC
| TO: S-001>109385
| FROM: S-34>093842
| RE: OPERATION FLAMING LANTERN
COLLAPSED SRA + VICTIM REMAINS ARE IN CONTAINMENT @ 34, RESTRICTED TO LEVEL 4 CLEARANCE
SURVIVOR AUTOPSIES SCHEDULED FOR TWO WEEKS
DOCUMENT TRANSFER UPDATE? SOME ADMINS WORRIED ORIA DIPLOMATS MAY TRY TO RAISE FUSS WITH GOCS

| 09031990████Z
| ENCODED TRAFFIC
| TO: S-34>093842
| FROM: S-001>109385
| RE: OPERATION FLAMING LANTERN
SUCCESS - AMBASSADORS ACCEPTED DOCUMENT AS SIGN OF COOPERATION + REPARATION FOR TURNING AWAY STRIKE TEAMS
ORIA OF LOW RISK
WHO'S GONNA BELIEVE THEM?

Footnotes
1. Foundation multipurpose site in Balochistan, Pakistan
2. Foundation compartmentalized security nomenclature; equivalent to Top Secret.
3. President of Afghanistan from 1987 to 1992.
4. Foundation practice of chemically erasing memories from civilian witnesses.

« SCP-5494 | SCP-5495 | SCP-5496 »


Alright, just put that there. And, uhh… might as well get started.
I've probably done this before.
Attention
Automated restriction of this document is not possible. If you do not have Level 4-5497 clearance do not continue reading.

Item Number: SCP-5497
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: Any personnel that view this document without Level-4-5497 clearance are to immediately visit their site's local amnestisicist and have their memory of viewing this document removed. This is not necessarily an urgent matter, as SCP-5497 is considered benign. However, unauthorized duplication of this document and/or any sharing of information regarding SCP-5497 will result in disciplinary action.
Research Lab 127 at Site 17 is to remain locked whenever SCP-5497 is not being tested. Keys to unlock it are found in Dr. Ziegler's office.
SCP-5497-1 may be entered either to conduct testing or to edit this document. The procedures for thorough testing or editing are detailed below.

A paper copy of this document is to be printed. Any text deemed extraneous is to be whited out and the copy may be additionally modified to accommodate any desired edits.
The copy is to be given to the test subject. The test subject is to read through it several times.
The test subject is to enter SCP-5497-1 and the door sealed behind them.
The subject is to immediately reread the entirety of the document given to them.
If further testing has been planned, testing may now begin, if not, the subject must immediately exit SCP-5497-1.

Only one test subject may enter SCP-5497-1 at a time. Staff should be present when the test subject exits SCP-5497. If utmost care is not taken in enacting these procedures, The Foundation's documentation on SCP-5497 may be corrupted or completely lost.
Description: SCP-5497 refers to any document or means of information storage that relates to SCP-5497. This includes not only physical and digital documentation, but also the portions of a person's memories dedicated to SCP-5497.
SCP-5497-1 refers to a room at Research Lab 127 of Site-17. Physically, SCP-5497-1 is 3x3x2 meter room constructed of plywood, and painted white, with one entrance and wooden supports on its exterior. The interior walls are lined with an interconnected grid of wires, conduit, receptacles, switches, LED lights, and logic controllers. Portions of this grid are arranged into glyphs, most of which are known to be memory inducing in nature. Interfering with this grid or with the switches on the gird is strictly forbidden, even for testing purposes.
When a person enters SCP-5497-1 their entire conscious stream of thought starting from moment the door to SCP-5497-1 closes is recorded and interpreted as text. When the door is reopened, this recording overwrites all existing copies of SCP-5497. This is what necessitates this entire document being read by anyone who enters SCP-5497-1, as their thoughts overwrite all information pertaining to SCP-5497.
There is evidence that this document has been nearly wiped clean before, necessitating most of our information about SCP-5497 being rediscovered through testing. Enough information survived the most recent wipe to convey that the wipe was caused by changing the state of one of the switches in SCP-5497-1, and that memories were not previously affected by SCP-5497. Attempts to undo the wipe resulted in SCP-5497 replacing the code that restricts access to this document with the text form of this document.
The origin of SCP-5497-1 is assume to have been deleted by one of these wipes.
The following are conclusions from previous testing with SCP-5497. All future edits to this document are to be added to this section.

There is no way to record anything other than basic text into SCP-5497.
Allowing more than one person to enter SCP-5497-1 at a time will cause their thoughts to be transcribed on top of each other, rendering the resulting text illegible. Following this test SCP-5497 had to be thoroughly analyzed to rediscover its meaning.
Paper or digital documents will expand to encompass new text added upon generating a larger version of SCP-5497.
Overwrite will occur on a person's memories if they have knowledge that an overwrite will occur.
Overwrite will occur on any digital files related to SCP-5497, but the name of said files will not be overwritten.
Memories of previous versions of this document cannot be recovered with mnestics.
Listing of specifics is to be avoided where possible. Dates in particular are subject to being misread and have caused problems in the past.
Breaks in consciousness, such as sleeping without dreaming, are not recorded by SCP-5497.

Addendum: Okay, that's it… Now it's testing time.
Well we got, uuhh, we're going to try to test REM sleep. It seems that during that, uh last test the guy was asleep but he didn't dream.
I have some pills here, they're for.. sleeping and inducing REM sleep. So that way I'll have a dream. I also have a cot to sleep on and a blindfold since we can't turn off the lights in here. I'm going to set an alarm for 4 hours from now.. Which it's 5:28 now.
6, 7, 8, 9, 9:30
There we go.
And uhh, pills.
Ahhck!
You'd think I'd be better at taking pills with this job.
Well, I got the alarm, pills, cot, and.. and uh that's everything, So I got to sleep.
Try to sleep.
Try to sleep.
It takes a while I guess.
Just a while.
This isn't the first time I've taken any kind of sleeping pills is it?
Huh, I wonder if I was the one who did the last test on this?
So on Monday was when I had to go with Dr. Ziegler to figure out what this document meant.
Just a pre schedule meeting, there were more people there, it took us most of the day.
Tuesday we started to prepare for testing, that was a bit shorter.
Wednesday l was training for this all day.
And today is testing day.
Why was I chosen for testing?
Last Friday. I try to think of it, and this document just fills up my head.
I must have done something with it then.
Was the last test Thursday or Friday?
You know the calendar might have it. I don't think it was overwritten. Must be too simple or something.
There's something going on with that calendar. One week didn't feel like long enough to prepare for this. Especially if we do this every week. What did I do last week? There's a lot of gaps with just this document filling them, so I must have been.
You know, I don't have to think about this now, just cause the last tester did.
Just try to think about nothing, it'll make deciphering this easier next week.
…
nothing
it kinda works
…

There's a presentation room, there are multiple people sat around the center desk. They are formal.
A man is standing at the end of the desk of the room. He is also formal. He is speaking.
You really just need to abandon this idea of you. It's not helpful for this. Look, if I made a copy of your conscious stream of thought and uploaded it to a computer, which would you say is you? OK, now you wake up one day and find out that you've been uploaded to a computer. But this fleshy version of you claims to be more you than you are, and thus you are not entitled to any of your belongings, accounts, or relationships. You'd probably be pretty mad.
But that never has happened to you. Why is there any continuity to your thoughts. You've never woken up in a different body than the one you went to bed in. There are infinite continuities out there, which mean there are infinite yous out there. Why is it that every day you wake up to continue this one continuity where there's causality and things make sense.
The thing is… you don't. You dream.
There are murmurs from the crowd.
OH, Don't bring reality into this. From your perspective, which is the only perspective that should matter to you, everything that happens to you feels real. Dreams feel real.
Wherever your stream of thought goes is where you go. And these different continuities, these different lives that you live. What if we could record them. What if we could move to or from them at will. What if we could implant them over the boring reality of thoughts we normally have to deal with?
You, from the crowd, speaks up. "I'm sorry but we are on a tight schedule, and you still haven't given us a realistic way to approach this ."
Realistic? It doesn't need to be realistic!
He approaches you.
After everything I've told you, why would you still assume that!?
Why do you still think things exist outside of your perspective?
Why do you still hold onto some vague concept of you?
Why do you think that this is still real?
Why would you assume this is real?!
Snap out of it!
Wake up!
WAKE UP!
WAKE UP!

BEEP-BEEP!
BEEP-BEEP!
BEEP-BEEP!
Uhh. 9:30. uhh. come on turn off.
I, uhh, ok. Dreams.
Come on wake up.
Uhh.. I. Did I dream?
Maybe, it's very vague…
You know this is useless.
Every day I wake up and go to this stupid job where nothing makes sense. Look sorry I'm tired but, this is the exact same thing that was written on the last document. Why can't we try to record some of it. Just to make sure that we're not stuck testing the same thing every week.
I know the document says to keep it simple to stop misinformation, but what if that just got made up along the way.
Like, are we actually getting anything done with testing this?
Just get all the stuff, I just want to get out of here.
I have the papers, the clock, bed, water, nothing left behind.
We're good to go.
For the record, this is at least the third sleeping test.

« SCP-5496 | SCP-5497 | SCP-5498 »


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Item #: SCP-5498
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5498 is to remain suspended in opaque stasis gel, which is then stored within a dark containment locker, void of light.
Description: SCP-5498 is a set of two ambulatory eyeballs with unknown thaumaturgic symbols tattooed on the sclera. SCP-5498 was capable of observing and transmitting both visual and audible data to PoI-0971 ("Masego Anavrin").
Discovery
SCP-5498 was discovered during a raid on an organization known as the Fifth Commune in Lyndhurst, New Jersey. At the time, SCP-5498 resided within Himani Patel's eye sockets1. Patel was a latent reality bender with strong connections to the Fifth Commune. It is speculated that she had intimate relationships with the Fifth Commune's leading figures, including PoI-0971. According to Foundation agents within the Fifth Commune, Patel was involved in an occult ritual at the time of the raid2.
The raid inadvertently resulted in the destruction of the Fifth Commune, and several of its members and leadership figures were killed. Patel and the other survivors were interrogated and administered Type D amnestics. Patel, however, proved resistant to the amnestic treatment and was taken to Site-83 for further examination and medical treatment. SCP-5498 was discovered by Dr. Andrews following an ocular examination.
Patel, who was unaware of these symbols, speculated that PoI-0971 might have been involved. By her account, PoI-0971 exhibited predatory behavior toward her during their time within the Fifth Commune3. Patel agreed to have SCP-5498 removed under the condition that the Foundation synthesize new eyes for her. Her request was denied, and SCP-5498 was removed after heavy sedation.
A comprehensive list of letters sent by PoI-0971 to Himani Patel prior to their containment can be found below.

Interview PoI-0971

Close File

Over the course of twenty days PoI-0971 made several unsuccessful attempts at breaching Site-83. It was hypothesized that he was attempting to abduct Himoni Patel for currently unknown reasons.
On February 10th, 2024, PoI-0971 managed to successfully enter Site-83 and eluded Foundation security for forty minutes before being apprehended just outside of Patel's containment suite. He was brought to Site-83's interrogation chamber and questioned by Dr. Andrews.
Interviewer: Dr. Andrews
Interviewed: PoI-0971
<BEGIN LOG>
Andrews: State your name for the record, please.
PoI-0971: Does that really matter?
Andrews: Answer the question, then we can continue.
PoI-0971: Masego Anarvin, husband to Himani Anarvin. I'd like to see her, before you wipe my mind that is.
Andrews: I'm afraid that won't be possible.
PoI-0971: Why? Why not?
Andrews: We have reason to believe that you are directly responsible for the creation of SCP-5498.
PoI-0971: I was just looking out for my wife. Can't blame a husband for being concerned, can you? Just let me see her, I need to know if she's alright. The ritual could have been painful.
Andrews: I think we both know that would be detrimental to Himani's mental health, wouldn't you agree?
PoI-0971: No, no. I think a visit would be extremely helpful. You're keeping her somewhere dark, and quiet. And she's all alone. She's terrified… You have to take me to her. Now.
Andrews: You are in no position to make demands, sir. We've removed SCP-5498 from Himani. You can't spy on her.
PoI-0971: You did… what?
Andrews: We've worked out how you managed to discover this location, but we haven't figured out why you've taken such an interest in Himani Patel. Can you elaborate?
PoI-0971: I told you, she's my wife. My wife whom you've kidnapped and blinded for no goddamn reason!
Andrews: Our records indicate that-
PoI-0971: Your records are outdated.
Andrews: I sincerely doubt that.
PoI-0971: Are you calling me a liar?
Andrews: I would never insinuate that, Mr. Anarvin.
PoI-0971: Then what are you trying to say?
Andrews: I was inquiring about your relationship with Himani.
PoI-0971: Stop calling her that.
Andrews: I'm sorry, I don't understand. Stop calling her what?
PoI-0971: "Himani". It's Mrs. Anarvin to you. She's my wife. MINE. Don't talk about her like you know her. You don't know shit about her. You weren't a part of the Commune. You didn't watch over her when she went shopping with her friends or tried on clothes in the fitting room at Walmart. You weren't there for anything, never protected her, never saved her. Don't speak like you did.
Andrews: My apologies.
PoI-0971: It's fine, it's just… Himani's my everything. She grounds me, and I keep her out of trouble.
Andrews: So you were like a guardian of sorts?
PoI-0971: I shield her from everything. I know she appreciates it; the few times she caught me doing my job she smiled and waved at me. That's how she lets me know she loves me. ( He pauses ). She's naive. You've seen it for yourself I'm sure. She's nice. Too nice. A lot of guys think she's flirting with them.
Andrews: What do you do to those men?
PoI-0971: I saved her. I'm not a bad person.
Andrews: What did you do?
( PoI-0971 scratches the back of his head and looks down. )
PoI-0971: Okay look, I never killed anyone. But they… ( He laughs ) The Commune put themselves in that situation, ya know? It's their fault they wound up like that.

The 14/02/24 Incident

Close

PoI-0971 began experiencing emotional distress in his containment cell on February 14th, 2024. The following security footage was recovered after the incident:

13:02: PoI-0971 is sitting in his cell.
13:05: There is a slight tremor. PoI-0971 notices this but dismisses it.
13:06: There is a second tremor. PoI-0971 gets up and requests to be let out.
13:08: Cracks appear in the east-facing wall.
13:13: An envelope manifests in between the cracks. PoI-0971 investigates.
13:15: PoI-0971 opens the envelope and extracts a sheet of paper, presumably a letter. He reads it.
13:16: After reading the letter, PoI-0971 exhibits extreme emotional distress and bangs on the containment chamber door repeatedly.
13:17: A containment breach alarm is heard.
13:18: A hand manifests from the floor and grips the east-facing wall. The hand ascends.
13:20: Himani Patel's head emerges from the hole in the floor. She continues using the wall to ascend.
13:21: PoI-0971 retreats from the containment chamber door, facing Patel. Patel approaches him.
13:22: Patel vocalizes something that causes PoI-0971 to cover his eyes. He sits on the ground in the fetal position.
13:21: Tentacle-like appendages emerge from Patel's back and attack PoI-0971 via bludgeoning. Blood is splattered against the walls and floor.
13:25: PoI-0971 ceases to move. Patel extracts his eyes and heart before consuming them.
13:26: Patel exits through the cracks in the wall.

The following is the contents of the letter recovered from the containment chamber:

I know you've been watching me, Masego. You had no idea what I was, or else why would you have starved me for so long? It's a misunderstanding that could have been fixed if you just talked to me, sweety.
But I forgive you. I forgive you because I love you.
And I love you to death.

Himani Patel's location is currently unknown.

Letters found in Himani Patel's containment suite

Close File

The following is a comprehensive list of letters from PoI-0971 that Himani Patel relinquished upon her arrival in Foundation custody.

I've seen you almost every day at the Colonial4 and I wonder to myself "How can I approach you?". Every time I think about doing so, I am overcome with fear and anxiety. You looked so beautiful when you came into our dimension. I'll never understand why you hide those tattoos on your back.
My shyness gets the better of me, you understand. Sometimes I sit in the booth behind you, thinking about what to say. Your hair smells so nice, and it distracts me a lot of the time. God, I wish I could talk to you.

I saw the way you tore that policeman apart when he wrongfully gave you a parking ticket yesterday. Took him into an alley where no one would see. No one, but me that is. Were you putting on a show? I don't know what you did to him, but the mess you left behind… He must have been quite the asshole. I would never treat you that way.
You walked outta there with that smile on your face. Do you think that your power gives you security?
There was a man who was coming to approach you afterward. You didn't have time to change into new clothes yet, and the illusion spell covering up the body hadn't been fully cast yet. I saw you panic, Himani, and I did what any good boyfriend would do.
You don't have to worry about that guy anymore.
P.S. You really shouldn't shower with that Old Spice stuff. It's bad for your skin.
P.P.S. I've asked around and did some research. The higher pressure settings in the shower work better, I hear.

Reverend Koin tells us that we should act like gods and take what we want. If only I had the courage to take you.
That girl isn't right for you. I've seen the way she looks into your eyes. There's nothing there but insanity. She stares at you when you aren't looking. I've seen it in your peripherals. She's nothing more than a predator.
My wife deserves better. You need me.

Why are you doing this to me? Are you mad about that rando? Get over yourself, I'm trying to help you!
What's Elizabeth got that I don't, huh? The Commune is dead now. We're all on the same level.
She cheats on you, you know, with Brandon and Ginger. When you go to work, or on your walks, she'll call them up and they'll be at the house within the hour. I've seen them fuck. On your our bed. I've seen that bitch use your shower settings.
I can make you happy, Himani. Give me a chance.

I went to your apartment while you were at work. Took the liberty to clean up the huge mess you left behind, rid of the arms and legs, and cleaned up all the blood. Brandon and Ginger are… well, they aren't competing for your love anymore.
The police shouldn't occupy you with their stupid questions now, my love.

I realized the decision must have been hard on you. That's why I made it for you, as a good husband should.
I love you, Himani Patel.

Why haven't you responded to my letters, Himani? Why are you crying? Am I too far away? Are you scared to show me what you really are? I can handle it. I'll love you no matter what.
You've captured my eyes, and taken my heart. I belong to you, now and forever.

Footnotes
1. Curiously, Himani Patel did not have any public or private records.
2. Several thaumaturgic symbols of unknown origin and intent were tattooed on Patel's back. She also had deep lacerations across both of her wrists and ankles, which suggest attempted exsanguination.
3. Including but not limited to; sending unsolicited gifts, love letters written on flower petals, staring at her for extended periods of time, photographing her while unconscious, and consuming her hair.
4. A popular eating establishment in Lyndhurst.

« SCP-5497 | SCP-5498 | SCP-5499 »


Threat Level: Green

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5499 is to be stored, unpowered, in the ████-██ Equipment Storage Wing. Due to the nature of ████-██'s primary project, transfer of SCP-5499 to a proper containment site has been deemed unfeasible at present.
Description: SCP-5499 is an L71-Brand Smart Refrigerator, Model 2S. Prior to its installation in the ████-██ Break Room on January 31st, 2005, SCP-5499 displayed no anomalous properties.
Outside of direct observation, SCP-5499 is capable of damaging foodstuffs placed within its chassis. Such damages occur in bursts of 1 to 4, typically spaced at least 4 hours apart, and are accompanied by a series of messages played across SCP-5499's touchscreen. The process by which SCP-5499 chooses foodstuff is unknown, although it shows considerable preference towards foodstuffs of sweet and savory flavor profiles.
SCP-5499 was discovered following a series of complaints to the ████-██ Human Resources Department.

ADDENDUM 5499-001: OBSERVED ACTIVATIONS

The following is a rough approximation of the date and time of select activations, based on available security footage and subsequent tickets filed with the Human Resources Department. In the interests of budget, no tests were conducted on SCP-5499's anomalous properties.

Date and Time (Estimated)
Damage
Observed Messages

February 1st, 2005, 13:44

Bottle of iced tea completely drained.

"Mmm haha just what I needed"

February 1st, 2005 18:01

Containment Specialist ███'s lunch disappears, and Officer ██████'s brownie is reduced to half its original mass.

"Ah that hit the spot"

February 2nd, 2005, 14:48

Technician █████'s birthday cake is covered in a series of uneven depressions, with a plastic fork stuck into its side. Additionally, a carton of milk has been nearly drained.

"Yeah this is the good stuff mhm"

February 3rd, 2005, 13:36

Officer ██████'s lunch disappears, and Dr. ██████████'s tandoori chicken is missing a rough semi-sphere of mass.

"Hrm not my thing but maybe it's an acquired taste"

February 4th, 2005, 08:06

Vacuum flask of blood partially drained, and blood splatters across the interior of SCP-5499.

"EW EW EW FUCK EW HOLY SHIT WHY WAS THIS HERE"

Footnotes
1. A Foundation subsidiary dedicated to the production and retail of consumer electronics.

« SCP-5498 | SCP-5499 | SCP-5500 »


close

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Item #: SCP-5500
Level 0/5500

Object Class: Apollyon
Classified

A view from the Windsor football pitch, taken during a Foundation expedition to England in 2033, approximately two months after the death of SCP-5500-Ω-56.

Special Containment Procedures: Eschatological Lifted Veil protocols are in place due to SCP-5500. The general public has knowledge of anomalous phenomena and the existence of the Foundation, due to the apocalyptic state of the multiverse.
All Foundation research is focused on attempting to find the malefactor responsible for the death of all SCP-5500-Ω instances. All current motives and persons associated with the deaths of 5500-Omega instances are under investigation. Memetically coded text which is color-coded red and underlined, used to convey information learned about the malefactor and the method of the murders in such a way that only entities who exist above the known universe can see information. Scarlet Letter Investigative Protocols are utilized throughout this file and related documentation to convey information.
Description: SCP-5500 refers to an ongoing ZK-Class Reality Failure Scenario affecting at least 9,245 universes, as a result of the deaths of several instances of SCP-5500-Ω.
SCP-5500-Ω are humanoid, possibly human, entities that exist in a reality above the greater multiverse observed by the Foundation. These entities have the capability to alter our reality and adjacent realities through the medium of creative writing, though the amount of influence they have is unclear.
The death of an SCP-5500-Ω instance causes severe metaphysical backlash to the universe or entities it had a part in influencing. The broadness of the sphere of influence varies, as does the corresponding level of destruction— the Cause of Death of SCP-5500-Ω-1 was attributed to a heart attack.apparently natural death of SCP-5500-Ω-1 resulted in the deaths of at least four individuals and three SCP objects, while Cause of Death: Lacerations to stomach after being force-fed several polyhedral objects.the murder of SCP-5500-Ω-56 resulted in the complete destruction of the Horizon Initiative in all observed universes, as well as the depopulation of the United Kingdom in the Baseline universe.
SCP-5500-A is the third iteration of a device which was meant to observe SCP-5500-Ω instances in their reality.
Further Information is Classified and Stored only on Hard-Copy at the following Address...

« SCP-5499 | SCP-5500 | SCP-5501 »


SCP-5502: Where the Smoke Trail Ends
Created for: Deadly Bread as part of the 2020 Art Exchange.
Thanks to:

Aethris, for the idea
Rex Atlas
wctaiwan

▸ More by this Author ◂

{$comments2}

F.A.Q.

{$doesthisfixthebug}

Item#: 5502

Level4

Containment Class:
pending

Secondary Class:
none

Disruption Class:
?

Risk Class:
?

link to memo

Confiscated rope incense. Following SCP-5502, its smoke no longer induces anomalous hallucinations.

Special Containment Procedures: O5-3 has been designated as SCP-5502 Containment Director.1 Department of Analytics personnel have been tasked with investigation of the anomaly and granted special clearance for this purpose. The Department of External Affairs is in contact with groups of interest for information pertinent to SCP-5502. Other departments are to analyze recovered material as instructed.
All containment procedures for affected anomalies are to remain in effect until the cause of SCP-5502 is determined.
Description: SCP-5502 refers to an event on 2034/05/05 at around 04:10 UTC wherein all Fifthist-related anomalies known to the Foundation became neutralized. All persons of interest associated with various sects of the Fifth Church have been found deceased or are missing.
[Update 2034/05/12]: SCP-5502-A is the temporary designation for AO-10564-84-716, a heavily modified CRT television with an input tray. When the anomaly is powered on, placing an object in the tray transforms it into a Class-Rho memetic hazard, which conveys information about it to the viewer and can be interacted with. This process consumes the input.
Addendum 5502-1: Initial Report
Department of Analytics modeling unit CORRELATION.aic determined that a number of seemingly-unrelated events across various facilities merited further investigation. It filed a Potential Anomaly Report (PAR), which was reviewed by a pre-containment team at Site-11. When its claims were found to be substantiated, the situation was escalated to Overwatch Command.

File #: PAR-4083154
Date/Time: 2034/05/05 06:27:33 UTC
Summary: A number of unusual incidents have occurred within a short time frame, all with varying levels of connection to Fifthism.
Details:

Subject
Summary
Description of Event

SCP-1032
Predictive alarm clock with multiple hands.
SCP-1032-011 reached midnight. It was labeled with "A Major Religion" prior to its incidence.

PoI-3879
Detained Fifthist occultist. 27-year old white female.
Despite being previously cooperative, the subject became hostile, and begin drawing hexagons on the floor of their cell. The subject was distressed and aggressive towards personnel, claiming that the drawings were intended to be five-pointed stars. Subject expired from cardiac arrest eleven hours later.

AO-77393-50-938
Crude pentagon constructed of lead. It would hover above the ground and revolve every 52 minutes and 5 seconds.
The item no longer exhibits anomalous properties. Large portions of its mass have been replaced with an unidentified yellow starchy material.

LoI-2814
Fifthist church near Cairo, Georgia.
Routine surveillance discovered that all members of the congregation were deceased, and lying prone on the floor. A large number of burnt wildflowers were found in the center of the building. The method of ritual suicide deviates from known Fifthist practices.

SCP-1425
Hardcover edition of the book Star Signals.
The anomaly is missing.

Addendum 5502-2: Recovered files concerning SCP-5502-A
As part of the investigation into SCP-5502, the Records and Information Security Administration (RAISA) was directed to audit all file updates which occurred during the relevant time period. This uncovered a connection to the anomaly now designated SCP-5502-A. Due to its relevance, a selection of recovered files have been attached. (See Addendum 5502-3)

Notice of Provisional Containment
File #: UPD-442760
Designation: AO-10564-84-716
Old Location: LoI-0752-48Y (Abandoned Marshall, Carter, and Dark warehouse)
New Location: Area-27, Wing D, Locker 159

Experiment Logs
Anomaly: AO-10564-84-716
Date / Time: 2034/05/04 17:20 UTC
Overseen By: Junior Researcher Murray
Approved By: Level-2 Object Supervisor Armando
Notes: Experiments were held in testing room D-08. Junior Researcher Murray also served as the subject.

Experiment AO-01
Input: Block of wood
Results: Anomaly displayed the wood sitting on a featureless, white surface. Subject was able to describe its texture and weight.

Experiment AO-02
Input: Apple
Results: Anomaly displayed the apple sitting on a featureless, white surface. Subject was able to describe its taste and scent.

Experiment AO-03
Input: Notebook, with pairs of numbers written
Results: Anomaly displayed the document on the same surface, closed. Subject was able to "see" the numbers if they focused on the image.

Experiment AO-04
Input: Caterpillar
Results: Anomaly displayed the caterpillar, inching along the surface. Subject was able to describe it crawling along his hand, as well as what it would look like as a butterfly.

Experiment AO-05
Input: Woodpecker
Results: Anomaly displayed the bird, flying hesitantly across the screen. It has since flown off and cannot be seen. Subject was able to describe the bird's behavior and call.

Further tests have been suspended due to the subject experiencing migraines from a persistent knocking sound. The subject has requested Class-A amnestics.

Addendum 5502-3: Discovery of SCP-5502-A
On 2034/05/12, the Memetics Department flagged an unusual set of patterns while investigating SCP-5502. Deep CLKM meta-analyses revealed a signature corresponding to a known anomaly.
RAISA conducted an extensive audit of the facility where this anomaly is kept, and made several findings:

This anomaly is partially uncontained.
AO-105640-84-716 was also being held in Reliquary Area-27, albeit temporarily.
AO-105640-84-716 was undergoing testing shortly before the incident (see above).
AO-105640-84-716 was left unattended in the chamber following the suspension of testing.
Two Class-H seals in the ventilation system were broken, permitting small airborne masses to travel between testing chambers.
AO-105640-84-716 experienced anomalous cross-contamination, resulting in the insertion of numerous hostile memes into the Noosphere.

To understand the consequences of this breach, Memetics Department personnel performed a tail analysis on areas affected by the memes. The results confirmed that the incursion facilitated by SCP-5502-A (a.k.a. AO-105640-84-716) resulted in SCP-5502. A snapshot from this scan has been attached:

+ Show image

Human-cognito memetic scan of now-neutralized anomaly SCP-3125.

Containment of SCP-5993 has since been reestablished. This file will be rewritten following Overseer Council consensus.

Footnotes
1. Containment Directors are part of the Containment Command System (CCS); a chain-of-command model for first contact with an anomaly. It was established in 1945 as a structured hierarchy for multiple agencies (both internal and external to the Foundation) to coordinate the safe recovery and containment of an anomaly.

More From This Author

More From This Author

aismallard's Works

SCPs

SCP-4339 •

SCP-4838 •

SCP-6115 •

SCP-4322 •

SCP-1047-J •

SCP-4781 •

SCP-5871 •

SCP-3597 •

SCP-5900 •

SCP-5510 •

SCP-5446 •

SCP-4853 •

SCP-4447 •

SCP-1294-J •

SCP-7558 •

Tales/GoI Formats

Stealing Something Else •

Continuous Integration •

The Pumpkin Mystery •

The Heart of the Beast •

Other

aismallard's personnel file •

« SCP-5501 | SCP-5502 | SCP-5503 »


Item #: SCP-5503
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: All known instances of SCP-5503 are currently stored in the secure containment warehouse at Site-108. Tablets may be requested for testing purposes via the on-site pharmacy.
Description: SCP-5503 is a 2-item supplement package which was available to purchase in health food stores in Devonshire, United Kingdom between 10/11/2018 and 08/01/2019. The outer label reads "Feeling Gut! Supplement your natural optimism".
SCP-5503-1 is a tinted glass jar containing (at time of purchase) 30 strawberry flavoured probiotic tablets.
Transliteration of SCP-5503-1 label:

Feeling Gut Probiotic Boost!
30 chewable tablets
Suitable for vegetarians and vegans

Directions: For adults, chew one tablet daily alongside food for a maximum of three days. Do not exceed stated dose. Not suitable for children.
Do not consume tablets with hot drinks as this may reduce the efficacity.
Refrigerate after opening.
For short term use only
all-natural strawberry flavouring!

SCP-5503-2 is a tinted jar containing 150 antibiotic capsules.
Transliteration of SCP-5503-2 label:

Back to Baseline Balancing Capsules
Suitable for vegetarians

Directions: For adults, after Feeling Gut Probiotic Boost! course, take three tablets with meals daily for five days. Do not exceed stated dose.

Keep taking this medicine until the course is finished.

When SCP-5503-1 is consumed according to the package instructions, users experience an elevated sense of optimism and confidence. If, from the fourth day, the user proceeds to complete the full course of SCP-5503-2, the anomalous effects of SCP-5503-1 will be neutralised and their mood will return to baseline.
Should a person continue to use SCP-5503-1 beyond the recommended 3 day period, or fail to take SCP-5503-2, the effects will continue to escalate. The user will become simultaneously more confident in their own capacities, and less able to perceive potential risks. They will also express a growing desire to have an enjoyable time at the expense of completing necessary tasks or working towards long term goals.
Discovery: SCP-5503 was first discovered following a series of high profile deaths in the Devonshire area when a significant increase in unusual deaths was reported over a two month period. Incidents included jumps from rooftops, vehicular accidents, and a mass drowning. The sole survivor of the drowning incident, Ms. Mia Price, was interviewed by Field Agent Amy Worthing1.

SCP-5503 Interview: Mia Price

- Hide Interview

Interviewed: Ms. Mia Price
Interviewer: Field Agent Amy Worthing
Foreword: Interview conducted at Bigbury-on-Sea police station following an incident at Bigbury beach. Medical reports state that Ms. Price was recovering from a moderate case of hypothermia.

[Begin Log]
Field Agent Worthing: How are you feeling this morning, Mia? The doctors said -
Ms. Price: Never better, thanks. Looking forward to heading home if we're all finished here?
Field Agent Worthing: We'd like to ask you a few questions about what happened to you and your friends first if that's okay?
Ms. Price smiles and tilts her head.
Ms Price: Of course! I'm sure it won't take long. I'll have this all cleared up for you in no time.
Field Agent Worthing: Mia, can you tell me what you remember about that evening?
Ms. Price: No problem! I have a great memory, you know? Never forget a thing. We were walking back from our yoga class when I suggested we should all go for a swim. I've always been a strong swimmer, ever since I was a young lass. I'm really fast. I could've swum for Britain.
So we stripped right off. The beach was empty - and who really cares if some lucky dogwalker got himself an eyeful. We swam out together. Really in the moment. Loving life, yeah? You should try it sometime. Maybe you could -
Field Agent Worthing: Mia. Do you remember what happened to your friends?
Ms. Price: Well, I think Matty went home first. His wife was probably looking forward to seeing him and he wouldn't want to disappoint her! Claire went next. Me, I could've stayed out there for days!
Ms. Price grins widely and leans forwards across the table.
The guys who picked me up were shocked! They said they'd never known somebody go so far out in the Winter. Next week, I'll go even further. Really show them. I can't wait to see their faces!
Field Agent Worthing: Mia, I'm afraid your friend's bodies were found washed ashore -
Ms Price: No. I'm sorry, you're mistaken. Those - maybe you thought you found some bodies. But, you see, I'm having coffee with Elaine tomorrow. And - Oooh, she's going to laugh at this!
Field Agent Worthing: Her brother was here this morning to identify -
Ms. Price: Oh! That's lovely that he's here, it is! He'll have to come along and grab a cappuccino! We can all catch up. I know this place that does cake that's near as good as mine. A chocolate one. Gets better every time we go. I'll write down where it is for you. You're going to love it, promise.
Field Agent Worthing: Mia -
Ms. Price: Can I go now? It's been fun, but I'm a busy girl, you know? But we can catch up soon! I'll leave you all my number! I'm sure you'll have this mix-up sorted soon.
[End Log]

Following the interview, Ms. Price was treated with a course of SCP-5503-2 and amnesticized before being released.

Packages of SCP-5503 were found in 88% of the victim's homes, including that of Ms. Price and the drowned individuals. In 90% of cases, SCP-5503-2 was unopened. A general product recall notice was issued throughout the region and remaining stocks of SCP-5503 were taken into Foundation custody.
To test the effects of SCP-5503-1 in a controlled environment, a daily dose was administered to D-42451,2 to be continued for a period of 30 days. The behaviour and mood of the test subject was to be monitored via interview and observation. Prior to commencement, D-42451 had no history of depression and displayed a mood consistent with their current situation.

Selected Interviews: SCP-5503-1 Trials

- Hide Interviews

SCP-5503-1 Day 1, 01/03/2019
Interviewed: D-42451
Interviewer: Dr. Liam Walker

[Begin Log]
Dr. Walker: Good morning, D-42451. How are you feeling?
D-42451: Not bad thanks, Doctor.
Dr. Walker: Any discomfort? Have you noticed any changes in your mood?
D-42451: I can't complain. I mean, it's taco day so I'm feeling pretty good about that. Otherwise.. nothing unusual I don't think. Does that mean it isn't working? They didn't -
Dr. Walker: Thank you, D-42461, that will be all for today.
[End Log]

SCP-5503-1 Day 5, 05/03/2019
Interviewed: D-42451
Interviewer: Dr. Liam Walker

[Begin Log]
D-42451: Good morning, Doctor!
Dr. Walker: Good morning, D-42451 - how are you feeling?
D-42451: Great thanks. I slept like a baby. My roommate didn't come back after testing yesterday. Fella used to snore like crazy. Best night's sleep I've had in ages.
Dr. Walker: Have you noticed any other changes -
D-42451 smiles and winks.
D-42451: Well your assistant gave me a lovely smile on my way in - does that count? I think she likes me. And my hair looks great! Is this pill some kind of… I don't know, a hair restoring pill or something? By the time that I get out of here it'll be down to my knees at this rate!
Dr. Walker: That's all for today, I think, D-42451.
[End Log]

Note: No changes in D-42451's general appearance were recorded prior to or during the interview.

SCP-5503-1 Day 12, 12/03/2019
Interviewed: D-42451
Interviewer: Dr. Liam Walker

[Begin Log]
Dr. Walker: Good -
D-42451: Alright, Doctor? It's your favourite patient! Here to brighten up your morning! Look at this - I think your pill has made my biceps even firmer. Look! Your girl outside could barely keep her hands off of me!
D-42451 flexes his arms at Dr. Walker. No change in musculature or appearance, positive or otherwise, is evident.
Dr. Walker: I see. Well, have you -
D-42451: I tell you, when we're done here I'll be selling smiles and making movies! I've got this great idea about a handsome guy who ends up in some secret institution -
Dr. Walker: D-42451, I'm sure it's a fantastic idea, but can we talk about -
D-42451: Don't want it ruined for you? Yeah, I get it. But, you know, you're going to love it! This guy, you see - and obviously I'll play the lead - he's going to find a way to get -
Dr. Walker: Thank you, D-42451, that will do for today.
[End Log]

Note: Following testing, D-42451 continued to detail plans for filming a movie to the security team as he was returned to his room. Security personnel reported no details of particular interest.

SCP-5503-1 Day 19, 19/03/2019
Interviewed: D-42451
Interviewer: Dr. Liam Walker

[Begin Log]
D-42451: Morning, Liam! Love the shirt! Can't wait to have one like it! So, the best thing happened. I talked your Poppy outside into getting dinner! Or, at least, I'm going to later. I know! You're thinking who could turn this charmer down. Not Poppy, mate. She's proper smitten. Lucky girl!
Dr. Walker: D-42451, I hardly think -
D-42451: Don't worry, mate, there won't be any trouble! And I'll bring her back in plenty of time for work tomorrow. I'll have to have a better room, of course, to take her back to. Sure I can persuade you, though. I mean, I am your favourite patient.
D-42451 winks and clicks his tongue twice.
Dr. Walker: I -
D-42451: So! I wrote a script. Well - didn't write it. All up here, it is.
D-42451 taps his left temple with his index finger.
D-42451: A memory like mine's a useful thing in the movie business. So, okay, you're going to love this. First -
Dr. Walker: D-42451, can we please talk about -
D-42451: Don't worry about that, Liam! Plenty of time for that when you've heard about -
Despite protests by Dr. Walker, D-42451 proceeds to describe his film plot in detail for a period of 6 minutes. Details omitted for brevity.
[End Log]

Note: Dr. Walker's assistant, Mrs. Wash, has shown no indication of interest in D-42451 and has at no point agreed to any form of fraternisation. Mrs. Wash has expressed a strong desire to be excused from duty during further interviews or testing.

SCP-5503-1 Day 24, 24/03/2019
Interviewed: D-42451
Interviewer: Dr. Liam Walker

[Begin Log]
D-42451: So Liam. Mate. Listen. I know these meetings make your morning, but it's time for me to head for Hollywood. Talent like mine… it isn't fair to deny the world. My face was made for fame and fortune.
D-42451 stands and attempts to walk out of the interview room, but is easily prevented from leaving by security personnel.
D-42451: No problem, guys! I get it. I really do. You'll miss me. But we'll see each other soon, I'm sure! You'll have to visit! Besides, with these great guns, I can go anywhere I want to.
D-42451 begins to punch and kick at the external wall, causing superficial damage to the surface rendering.
D-42451: I'll send a cheque to cover the damage! Don't worry, I'm sure your boss upstairs will understand. You tell them it was me - they'll probably make the hole a permanent feature!
After a further 3 minutes, D-42451 is again restrained by security personnel and returned to his room. As he leaves the room, D-42451 appears red-faced and is breathing heavily.
[End Log]

On 29/03/2019, 29 days into testing, D-42451 was found deceased in his room with severe cranial trauma, two broken fingers, and extensive abrasions. Security footage showed him repeatedly punching, kicking, and headbutting a wall, whilst repeating "They're going to love me!" Further testing schedules for SCP-5503-1 are temporarily postponed pending a procedural review.

Footnotes
1. Embedded as an investigator within Devon and Cornwall Police Force.
2. A 48 year old male of average height and build.

« SCP-5502 | SCP-5503 | SCP-5504 »


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▸ More by this Author ◂

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F.A.Q.

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[SKiPNET Login: Researcher Howard Oswald]
ACCESS GRANTED - Accessing Item #: SCP-5505

Item #: SCP-5505
Object Class: Pending
Special Containment Procedures: Investigation into SCP-5505 and the disappearance of Researcher Cynthia Oswald is ongoing.
Further information regarding SCP-5505's containment procedures can be found in Research document - SCP-5505.
Description: SCP-5505 is an inter-dimensional species of aquatic predator occupying an alternate dimension overlapping our own. SCP-5505 resemble lophiiformes (anglerfish), albeit significantly larger than average (up to 15 feet in length), and possess a level of intelligence similar to that of humans. SCP-5505 are carnivorous; instances primarily feed on live human beings.
The dimension in which SCP-5505 reside (SCP-5505-1) is oceanic. SCP-5505 are lone hunters by nature; instances will adopt an area within SCP-5505-1 that neighbors a location in our dimension. Such areas always contain a consistent human population and are utilised by instances as their primary hunting and nesting ground. SCP-5505 hunt with a telepathic sensory/influence organ, which superficially resembles a dorsal appendage1. This appendage allows instances to telepathically detect the conscious thought patterns and emotions of prey from long distances. SCP-5505 have evolved to primarily discern feelings of curiosity and interest.
While hunting, SCP-5505 instances will influence a subject's perception of their surrounding environment. This effects the visual, auditory, touch and taste stimuli of the subject. These combined influences on preys perception manifest as an illusionary hallucination varying in complexity, which may appear to them as other lifeforms, objects or a metaphysical concept with no discernible physical qualities (smells and distant sounds). These hallucinations are designed to stimulate curiosity and interest in prey, ensuring they remain within a fixed location. These specialised hallucinations are formed by instances gauging information from the preys subconscious to use as a basis. Additionally, personal knowledge known by the instance may be used to increase effectiveness.
Discovery Log: SCP-5505 was discovered and documented by Researcher Cynthia Oswald, director of Site-007. Following her discovery of SCP-5505, Researcher Oswald went missing on the 27/03/2020, reportedly last seen in her office.
Several personal journals written by Researcher Oswald were found upon examination. These journals document the anomaly and various theories regarding SCP-5505's cross-dimensional abilities (See full research document below). Additionally, a large puddle of salt water was found at the scene, the source of which remains unknown.
Abridged Summary: Researcher Oswald theorized that following a progressive decline of SCP-5505-1s human population, SCP-5505 had evolved to detect prey at significantly longer distances. This would eventually lead to an unintentional development of SCP-5505's anomalous abilities, enabling instances to detect prey within dimensions outside of SCP-5505-1.
Following the addition of this biological feature, SCP-5505 would further evolve to develop a means of accessing dimensions containing other potential prey. This eventually manifested as a clawed appendage, capable of hypothetically 'cutting' through alternate dimensions on a subatomic level.

Access Research Document - SCP-5505

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Post Incident Report
On the 08/05/2020, Level 2 Researcher Howard Oswald was reported missing from Site-007. Investigation continues; his disappearance is highly suspected to be of anomalous origin and in connection with the disappearance of Researcher Cynthia Oswald, Head of Site-0072.
Prior to his disappearance, surveillance footage showed researcher Howard had been working in his office for several hours, during which he accessed the SCP SKiPNET archive. While navigating through multiple SCP documents, footage showed researcher Howard momentarily losing focus before selecting the document slot for Item #: SCP-5505.
At the time of writing, there exists no such item designated SCP-5505.
Despite there being no visible document, researcher Howard continued to interact with his computer interface and performing eye movement as if to read text on-screen where there was none. During this time, researcher Howard appeared visibly anxious while continuing to interact with his computer interface, scrolling with the mouse and clicking where there was nothing to select. Minutes later, the flooring directly below researcher Howard was seen gradually beginning to ripple similarly to water. Researcher Howard then suddenly fell through the floor before disappearing entirely. The floor then settled back to its regular solidity.
Attempts to locate Researcher Howard have been unsuccessful. Upon inspection, a proportional amount of saltwater was found on the floor of researcher Howard's office where he had been working.
Given the similarities to the disappearance of Researcher Cynthia Oswald, lockdown of Site-007 has been approved and the investigation continues. The nature of these disappearances are still unknown. Investigating personnel are to follow any possible leads found within Site-007.

Footnotes
1. An appendage protruding from the heads of common anglerfish, used for luring in prey
2. See Incident 17/03/2020/Cynthia Oswald

« SCP-5504 | SCP-5505 | SCP-5506 »


Item #: SCP-5507
Object Class: Entos1
Special Containment Procedures: Due to its nature, SCP-5507 is effectively self-containing and is unable to impact reality. However, as the origin of its anomalous manifestation is unknown, it still poses a level of risk, and all personnel are advised to be cautious when experimenting with SCP-5507's metaphysics.
Description: SCP-5507's only defining characteristic2 is that of its SCP designation. In other words, SCP-5507 is only SCP-5507, displaying no other defining traits or signs of its existence. This identity of SCP-5507 is rigid, preventing other anomalies from being classified as such. It is theorized that SCP-5507 would functionally cease to exist if its classification were somehow revoked.
As a result of this, SCP-5507 does not intersect with any known plane of reality, making the nature of its existence unclear.
Discovery: SCP-5507's anomalous attributes were discovered on 01/██/2020 following the opening of Series VI, when researchers at Site-20 found themselves unable to classify an anomaly as SCP-5507. It is unknown when SCP-5507 had its 'pataphysical awakening, though it is believed to be either:

The introduction of Series VI slots into viable contention (12/21/2019)
The creation of SCP designations as a way of labeling anomalies (█/█/18██)
The pataphysical creation of labels as identifiers (unknown)

Addendum 5507-1 - An Explanation of SCP-5507 by Foundation ‘Pataphysics Researcher Dr. O. Malloy:

If you don't completely understand what SCP-5507 is yet, don't worry. It's quite hard to define it using a completely formal tone. I am placing this document here in order to provide a more in-depth explanation regarding the nature of SCP-5507 in a more straight-forward way.
First thing's first, SCP-5507 is an entire entity. If it was just an inaccessible slot, then it wouldn't be 'pataphysical. Not only is SCP-5507 this entity, but this entity is SCP-5507. For most SCPs, the -XXXX designation is just a way of efficiently ordering it; you wouldn't consider it crucial to its identity. This is not the case for SCP-5507.
Another common misconception about SCP-5507 relates to an object and its reference. An object is the physical (or not-so-physical) 'thing' that exists, while a reference is how we refer to the object, be it semantically or otherwise. The actual rug is the object, the word 'rug' is the reference. Some believe that, for SCP-5507, the SCP-5507 designation is both the object and the reference. This would mean a constant loop of designating upon designations, which would be a metaphysical nightmare.
This is not the case. The object and the reference are completely seperate here; it's just that the object's only trait is that of its reference. It's a null object. Think of programming; we construct different classes (object), each with its own methods (traits). Humans can eat, walk, etcetera. Now imagine an object whose only method is being called by its reference, and nothing else. That's what SCP-5507 is.
For a more scientific definition of SCP-5507's location in the “Pata-verse”, we first have to define the term “Planes of Reality”, a term derived from study of SCP-3812, SCP-1304 and [DATA EXPUNGED], along with several other items. A plane of reality is not equivalent to a universe - some planes may contain several universes or perhaps several multiverses. Planes of reality exist on several levels, with each level containing potentially billions of these planes, growing exponentially the lower we go. For reference, we define our level as Level 0.
SCP-5507 does indeed not exist on any of these fully-defined levels. So then how does it exist at all? Well, our current best theory is that the SCP Database acts as a level in between levels - a Level -0.5, if you will. The reason it isn't Level -1 is that the database is not meant to exist as a completely new universe/narrative, but due to some way reality works, it still ended up detached from our world.
Additionally, just because SCP-5507's sole defining trait is being SCP-5507 doesn't mean that's it's only trait. To illustrate this, I will be using booleans (AND, OR, NOT), as even though they are not metaphysics, they are still a useful tool.
Is it true that SCP-5507 is, say, a piece of birchwood? No, of course. But that doesn't mean that it is not not a piece of birchwood too. Another common misconception about SCP-5507 is that not only is it not something, but it is also not not something as well. In other words, they believe that SCP-5507 exists unrelated to this birchwood-not birchwood dichotomy. If this birchwood problem was shown on a Venn Diagram, they believe SCP-5507 would be outside both being birchwood and not being birchwood, which would be worrisome as those probabilities equal 1 - a certainty. Luckily, SCP-5507 is not this complex - aside from its 'pataphysical abnormality, SCP-5507 behaves similarly to other entities, metaphysically speaking.
Do note, however, that SCP-5507 not being something (or any of the other traits, like being able to be tested on) is simply an extension of SCP-5507's defining characteristic.

Addendum 5507-2 - Testing:
Following use of a(n) [REDACTED], Dr. Malloy was able to test SCP-2719 on SCP-5507 in order to observe it's reaction to physical attributes. Prior to this, Dr. Malloy's home had become the ‘inside'.

Pointer
Outcome

SCP-5507
null

This test shows that SCP-5507 is able to be tested on.
Being outside or inside something is more-so of a physical attribute. In this context, SCP-5507 is neither inside nor outside, because it doesn't exist in that space. Of course, SCP-2719 has been tested on concepts with success, so I suggest that we test SCP-5507 with that next. - Dr. Malloy
In the next test, the ‘inside' was the concept of transformation.

Pointer
Outcome

SCP-5507
null

It appears that SCP-5507 does not exist on a conceptual level either. - Dr. Malloy
Addendum 5507-3 - Excerpt from Characteristics and Their Relation with Existence by Senior Researcher Dr. Koschov ███ (9/17/20██):

In the past few years, the Foundation's understanding of the pataphysical nature of existence has come to focus on the idea that an entity's attributes are a crucial part in how they not only continue to ‘be', but also how they function. For example, if you are a human, then you have all of the functions that a human would have. If you are a bird, then you have the functions that come under what a bird would have.
However, the last couple of months have brought upon a startling realization. While for a long time we believed that all entities had the underlying trait of simply existing, following the results of [REDACTED], it seems that is not the case. The only thing keeping us from slipping off of the face of existence is our character, who we are - specifically our broad strokes traits, like species, location, etc. Luckily, we have many defining characteristics that make falling off unlikely.
Unfortunately, also in recent times, we now know of several anomalies capable of reconfiguring a person's entire identity, personality, and overall metaphysical existence to a great degree. Due to our reliance on several defining characteristics, it is believed that a transformation of this degree would be metaphysically fatal. While a person's physical body and brain may still be there, their previous ‘self' wouldn't. In truth, are you really the same person as you were when you were younger? If a retroactive anomaly wiped all records of your past actions, did they still happen?
…
It is unknown what happens to entities when they cease to exist. It wouldn't be the afterlife, as that isn't even out of our plane of existence, much less the ‘'Pata-verse'. Nor would it be [REDACTED], as that is still within ‘being'.
…
One question I have gotten is that if non-existence denies everything, then wouldn't it also deny itself? This is a great question… (cont.)

Footnotes
1. Object is contained via its database file.
2. characteristic (noun, metaphysics): A trait that is fundamental to the identity of an entity or a group of entities. Describing items as what they are not is not a defining characteristic.

« SCP-5506 | SCP-5507 | SCP-5508 »


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Uncle Nicolini
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Welcome, Dr. Archibald.
You are currently editing SCP-5510. Your session will expire after 118 seconds of inactivity.

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Item #: SCP-5510
Object Class: Safe (provisional)
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5510 is to be kept in a small-item locker. Confirmation testing is currently ongoing.
Description: SCP-5510 is a TV remote control. The object functions as expected, with the exception of its four media navigation buttons. When one is pressed, the subjective time experienced by the anomaly changes.
Addendum 5510-1: Testing Logs

Button
Result

Fast forward
SCP-5510 experiences time at half speed.

Rewind
SCP-5510 experiences time at double speed.

Play
No known effects.

Pause

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SCP-5511 - Who remembers you, when you are gone?

More from this author: http://www.scp-wiki.net/poi-3181-198-file
Critique Credit:
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Image Credits:
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2/5511 LEVEL 2/5511
CLASSIFIED

Item #: SCP-5511
Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: Containment for SCP-5511 is focused on investigating the cause of and attempting to prevent another occurrence of SCP-5511. All witnesses of the victims' deaths have been amnesticized, with the corpses being cremated to prevent investigation of the cause of death. Cover stories for their deaths have been disseminated. A disinformation campaign, painting the projection to the moon as a marketing stunt, is currently underway.
Description: SCP-5511 is an event that took place over the night of 2020/02/12 in which a total of 84 civilians died by having their heads spontaneously explode with a force of around one milliton of TNT. This caused another 20 people to die from the force or resulting debris, with over 30 being left injured. During this time, a projection of red letters (SCP-5511-1) appeared on the surface of the moon, changing whenever a new victim appeared. No cause or pattern could be found in any of the victims that could lead to finding a possible perpetrator.
Below is a list of a few notable victims, with the resulting change in SCP-5511-1. A full list is available to anyone assigned to this project with a clearance of Level 2 or higher.

Time
Info about the victim
Change in SCP-5511-1

18:30 EST
No victim, beginning of the event.
SCP-5511-1 first appeared, showing the number "000000".

~19:20 EST
1st victim. Eve Hendricks, a wife and mother of 2 from Bangor, Wales, age 32.
The number displayed by SCP-5511-1 increased by 800, now showing "000800".

~20:10 EST
13th Victim. Jennifer Köhle, a teacher at an elementary school from Munich, Germany, age 29.
The number displayed by SCP-5511-1 increased by 3100, now showing "012500".

~23:20 EST
32nd Victim. Gamal Alaoui, a CEO at a tech company from Cairo, Egypt, age 52.
The number displayed by SCP-5511-1 increased by 100, now showing "0034600".

~02:50 EST
49th Victim. Josue Caron, a popular live streamer from Lyon, France, age 17.
The number displayed by SCP-5511-1 increased by 2600, now showing "0052400".

~04:00 EST
64th victim. Eiji Oue, a NEET1 from Ōsaka, Japan, age 23.
The number displayed by SCP-5511-1 did not increase, still showing "0061400"

~06:20 EST
Last (84th) victim. Lance Masons, an office worker from Austin Texas, age 32.
The number displayed by SCP-5511-1 increased by 1200, now showing "076700".

06:30 EST
No victim, apparent ending of the event.
The number did not change in value but was displayed at a smaller size. A different writing appeared above it in larger letters, reading "GAME OVER".

Footnotes
1. "Not in employment, education or training."

« SCP-5510 | SCP-5511 | SCP-5512 »


Image of SCP-5513 (left) and "the SCP Foundation"1 (right) during Group Date-1, taken by "the Chaos Insurgency"2

Item #: SCP-5513
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Foundation AI Bot Love.aic is to monitor and, summarily, shutdown webpages that depict the following:
1. Artistic renderings of the SCP Foundation logo and/or personnel engaged in compromising positions with SCP-5513.
2. Fictional writings or articles based on a hypothetical relationship between the SCP Foundation and SCP-5513.
SCP-5513 is to be held in an intermediate-level reality bender human containment suite outfitted with Level-4 thaumaturgical reality dampeners. Any request by SCP-5513 for an interview, “date,” or interrogation must be held in an appropriately designed reality-controlled cell.
No Foundation personnel may reveal their face to SCP-5513. As such, security personnel must wear full black headgear.
Assigned researchers who conduct the interrogation must wear a full-faced plate mask inscribed with the logos of various anomalous associated agencies such as the SCP Foundation, Global Occult Coalition, or Chaos Insurgency. The assigned researcher must follow a pre-generated script written by Foundation-employed romance authors.
Description: SCP-5513 is a 19 year old female reality bending humanoid of Japanese ethnicity who refers to itself by the name "Kanako Nanami."
SCP-5513 believes that it exists within a “romance simulation video game"3 and prejudiciously behaves with other individuals as if they were characters in this game. Furthermore, its reality bending ability distorts the local environment to fit in with this preconception.
SCP-5513 abnormally conceptualizes the concepts of individuality and institutionality; it conjectures that the ethos of entire organizations are wholly personified by those wearing masks of said organization and disregards those that do not fit within this framework as “side characters."4
Periodically, SCP-5513 requests for a “hangout,” “get-together,” or “date” with one of the humanized organizations and this request may be granted in a secured cell.
Once in the cell, the walls, floor, and ceiling warp into several possible layouts. At this time, the assigned researcher must act in an exaggerated, oversimplified manner that is congruent with the expectations of SCP-55135.
The following are some examples of SCP-5513's intermediate-level reality bending;

Standard Humanoid Reality Alteration Report
Subject: SCP-5513
Change on Reality: ✓ Environment : ✕ Personnel
Location and Time: Interrogation Room-14, Site-041, 01/21/2020
Impetus: SCP-5513's second request for a “date” with the SCP Foundation (represented by Researcher Alastair).
Reality Change: Upon entering the interrogation cell, the interior of the room was transformed into that of a standard American high-school classroom. Testing by Researcher Alastair has shown that the dimensions of the room were altered and the walls appeared to have dematerialized, but there still existed functional barriers within the confines of the classroom.

Standard Humanoid Reality Alteration Report
Subject: SCP-5513
Change on Reality: ✓ Environment : ✕ Personnel
Location: Interrogation Room-14, Site-041, 03/04/2020
Impetus: During the end of the weekly “interview,” SCP-5513 clasped the hands of the Manna Charitable Foundation (represented by Researcher Sakura) and asked if it was possible for them to meet again soon. At that time, SCP-5513's cheeks flushed red and it tilted its head down.
Reality Change: At the moment of clasping, the walls' coloration changed to pink. A light pink mist spread on the ground from an unknown source. After affirmation by Researcher Sakura, the walls reverted back to their normal gray hue.

Standard Humanoid Reality Alteration Report
Subject: SCP-5513
Change on Reality: ✕ Environment : ✓ Personnel
Location: Annex Hallway 12-B, Site-041, 02/01/2020
Impetus: During transfer of SCP-5513 from its containment cell to the newly constructed dating chamber, SCP-5513 noticed Security Officer Izumi Takahiro without any proper headgear. SCP-5513 furrowed its brow and spoke in a low toned voice, “Ugh, I hate glitches.”
Reality Change: Security Officer Izumi Takahiro disappeared at the moment of eye-contact with SCP-5513. He was later found in Hong Kong, however, without memory of the incident.

The following interview was the first group interview that SCP-5513 requested with the SCP Foundation (represented by Researcher Nhật Minh), the Chaos Insurgency (represented by Researcher Kei Alastair) and the Serpent's Hand (represented by Researcher Hiro Hirokumi).

SCP-5513 Group Date-1; Site-041

SCP-5513 Group Date-1; Site-041

Recording-5513-Group Date-1
Date: 04/13/2020
Location: Dating Chamber-1, Site-041
Purpose: Pacify SCP-5513 through granting its request for interviews. Identify potential unknown aspects of SCP-5513 anomalous effect.
Note: SCP Researchers Minh, Alastair, and Hirokumi have been instructed to not speak or act in a clinical or professional manner and have been directed to act as personifications of their assigned organization. SCP-5513, seemingly, responds positively to this type of fanciful or otherwise whimsical conversation.
All actions and words are assessed and tracked in real-time by an outside observation team who discreetly communicate to the researchers through ear-pieces.
Recording Start: (When SCP-5513 enters the chamber, the volumetric dimensions of the room, outwardly, alter and the walls of the chamber appear to show a beach during sunset. The floor of chamber slowly transforms from concrete to sand.)"Chaos Insurgency": Hmph! I didn't come because of you or anything. Don't misunderstand!
"Serpent's Hand": Oh, just ignore him Kanako, you know how Chaos gets when he is in the same place as Foundation."Chaos Insurgency": Really! Despite her apology, you're still upset at Kanako-chan. You're as cunning as they come. (Chaos Insurgency smacks SCP Foundation on the back of the head)

"SCP Foundation":…Shut it Chaos…Kanako-chan you know I'm a private person. And you know I hate it when other people look at you. So anytime, any part of you pops up online, I get jealous.
"Serpent's Hand": (knocks his elbow at Chaos Insurgency and speaks loudly) Get a load of this guy. Who does he think he is?
"Chaos Insurgency": Hey SCP, you can't monopolize Kanako like that you know! She should be shown to anyone and everyone. How dare you keep taking down her drawings!"Serpent's Hand": Is anything wrong Kanako-chan?"Chaos Insurgency": No problem, I'll do this while that stoic SCP bums around.
"SCP Foundation": Any more words Chaos? I'll take you on if you really want.
"Serpent's Hand": (whispers to SCP-5513) Just let them go at each other, they will fight no matter what happens. You know that SCP's uptight attitude and Chao's tsun attitude will never match."Serpent's Hand": So what did you want to talk about Kanako-senpai?"Serpent's Hand": Of course! I'm like your little brother senpai."Serpent's Hand": Onee-san, you know SCP-san more than anyone. His ice-cold attitude and love of mystery is only second to you. He understands why you put them up but he would rather you give him the drawings then sharing them to everyone. By the way Kanako-senpai, how did you manage to put them online? I want to upload some drawings too so can you show me?"Serpent's Hand": (grabs SCP-5513's hand) Do you want to tell me anything else Kanako-senpai?"Serpent's Hand": I love you too Kanako!
"Chaos Insurgency": (while building the campfire, SCP-5513 comes from behind Chaos Insurgency and hugs him from behind) Hey! Cut it out Kanako!"Chaos Insurgency": I-It's not that I like you or anything…I just happened to have some free time. (SCP-5513 burrows its head into SCP Foundation's labcoat) Is everything alright Kanako? Who's bothering you, I'll kick his ass!"Chaos Insurgency": What does that mean Kanako?"Chaos Insurgency": …One of these days, you better get SCP to do all this work."SCP Foundation": I don't know Kanako. I see you whispering to Serpent and Chaos over there but I've been sitting here by myself."
"SCP Foundation": That's all and good, but I have a different way of having fun. (SCP Foundation gets up and sits closer to SCP-5513 and slowly grabs its hand) You've barely told me anything since the first time I met you Kanako-kun. Tell me more about yourself, you know secrets make me feel special. Especially your secrets…"SCP Foundation": You know how I love my privacy. But I keep forgetting, where did you come from?"SCP Foundation": Of course, of course. It's just my bad memory. Can you remind me what we were doing when we meet?"SCP Foundation": What is it Kanako-kun?"SCP Foundation": I lik…6love you.All of you stop lying to me! The love meters above your head have been at 0% from the start. What am I too you? (The ground of the dating chamber begins to lightly shake as SCP-5513 begins to cry.)
"Chaos Insurgency": (rushes towards SCP-5513) Kanako! What did that bastard say to you? (Researcher Alaister bursts into flames and falls his knees. Researcher Alaister begins to scream.)SCP-5513: (looks up) Huh? The meter…
"Serpent's Hand": Kanako-senpai, I think Chaos wants some time to rest now.Recording End
Immediate After Action Report: Researcher Nguyen instructed to kiss SCP-5513 in the next interview, if the opportunity arises. Researcher Alaister replaced with Researcher Sanchez.

SCP-5513's complete lack of recognition of “side characters” presents a potential avenue for permanent neutralization through various non-lethal methods. However, the apparent lucidity and awareness that SCP-5513 gains when observing “glitches” suggests that totally predictable behavior in such a negation procedure may not result.
At this time, additional interviews will be permitted until further behavioral analysis determines whether SCP-5513's supposed superficiality is genuine.
On multiple occasions, SCP-5513 has referred to “end-routes.” The following document was found during SCP-5513's cell during its eighth “interview.”

Good ending: reverse harem end!!! need all love bars to be at 100% (SCP, Chaos, Serpent, GOC, Sarkic) ❤❤❤❤❤ pain+healing=love?
Neutral ending: end up with only 1 guy (Serpent is too young, Chaos is too spicy, Sarkic is rich but a weirdo, GOC??) SCP-san is hot but doesn't open up.
Bad ending: no progress (╥_╥), just reset and try again.

Footnotes
1. (played by Researcher Nhật Minh)
2. (played by Researcher Kei Alaister)
3. Known colloquially as a “dating sim"
4. Practically, this is how SCP-5513 refers to security personnel and other extant individuals
5. ie. that of a stereotypical, overemotive romance character.
6. The research team informs Researcher Nguyen to use the word “love”

« SCP-5512 | SCP-5513 | SCP-5514 »