Olney Foods Processing Plant

Item #: SCP-5868
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5868 has currently been obtained from GoI-952 (“Olney Ironworks”) under a Foundation front. All former employees of SCP-5868 are to be retained. To facilitate containment, all employees are to work under the impression that SCP-5868 is still owned by GoI-952. Shifts are to ensure that SCP-5868 is manned at all times. Overtime, holiday bonuses, and other incentives may be used at the discretion of the Head Researcher. Employees of SCP-5868 are to be retained at all costs. D-Class may be used to replace deceased employees. D-Class who have formerly worked in the meatpacking industry are to be screened for this purpose.
Employees of SCP-5868 will be directed to continue processing all instances of SCP-5868-2 regardless of appearance, hazards inherent, or any other status. Notable instances of SCP-5868-2 are to be delivered to and retained at Site-156 and cataloged before being incinerated. All other instances of SCP-5868-2 are to be incinerated on-site after being fully packaged. Employees of SCP-5868 are to wear Class-C Hazmat Containment Gear at all times when on SCP-5868 property.
Employees charged with unloading SCP-5868-2 are to be instructed to not make contact with SCP-5868-1. All deliveries of SCP-5868-2 are to be unloaded without delay.
SCP-5868 is to be supplied with no less than ten back-up generators. Under no circumstances should employees cease processing SCP-5868-2 instances. Packages may be reused after the SCP-5868-2 instances are incinerated. If a back-up occurs, D-Class are to be brought in to help the processing of the additional SCP-5868-2 instances. If SCP-5868-2 instances are kept from being processed for longer than six hours, containment will no longer be necessary.
Description: SCP-5868 is the Olney Foods Processing Plant located in Riker's Valley, ME. Records show that the anomalies started occurring on 02-13-2016 at 5:35 AM with the first delivery by SCP-5868-1. SCP-5868 was seized by the Foundation front Preferred Options Holdings in a hostile takeover on 04-27-2016. SCP-5868 shows no other anomalous aspect apart from the deliveries of SCP-5868-2. Instances of SCP-5868-2 processed at a secondary location are sufficient to avoid increased deliveries from SCP-5868-1.
SCP-5868-1 is a semi-trailer truck that manifests at the docking bay of SCP-5868 hourly. After idling for fifty-five minutes, SCP-5868-1 immediately demanifests. All instances of SCP-5868-2 remaining inside SCP-5868-1 during a demanifestation are left at the loading bay. Contact with SCP-5868-1 other than unloading SCP-5868-2 causes [DATA i'm so hungry please god please help me i want the taste i need the taste the shit the mire the the dirt it's so strong in my nostrils it rings so true i am under the swinging blade i feel my blood run into gutters there is something that i can't see just beyond me i'm so hungry it's on my tongue like pennies i'm so hungry i can't stop eatingEXPUNGED] which results in an unnecessary interruption in the containment procedures. The interior of SCP-5868-1 has been shown to be larger on the inside, housing a number of SCP-5868-2 instances that would prove impossible in a non-anomalous semi-trailer truck.
SCP-5868-2 are cow (B. taurus) carcasses. Instances of SCP-5868-2 are normally afflicted with Rinderpest morbillivirus, bovine spongiform encephalopathy, and infectious pododermatitis. Variation among SCP-5868-2 instances exist, although all have been shown to be genetically identical to a cow.
When an instance of SCP-5868-2 is not processed and packaged within an hour, the next load delivered by SCP-5868-1 is greater in number than the previous delivery. This build-up is theorized to be able to render the Earth uninhabitable within twelve hours. However, recent models have shown that a six hour blockage would result in a backlog of SCP-5868-2 instances impossible to process within the time limit.
Partial Record of SCP-5868-2 Variants:

Date Processed: 06-15-16, 12:35 PM
A single SCP-5868-2 instance that resembled a mouse (M. musculus). Of note is that this was the entirety of that hour's delivery.

Date Processed: 11-02-16, 7:35 AM
All 1,116 instances of SCP-5868-2 resembled the same adult human male. Of note is that the instances took the appearance of an employee of SCP-5868 who had [DATAif you let me out i'll never try to stop you again i'll never be bad i promise i'm so full i'm so hungry EXPUNGED] after attempting to open SCP-5868-1's driver-side door an hour earlier.

Date Processed: 03-22-17, 8:35 PM
All 857 instances of SCP-5868-2 were shown to be highly radioactive. Over 66 employees were subjected to dangerous levels of gamma radiation. Four employees succumbed to fatal radiation poisoning. The remaining sixty-two employees were able to continue work at a reduced capacity.

Date Processed: 06-09-18, 3:35 AM
Delivery contained 2,693 instances of SCP-5868-2, much higher than the average. All instances, however, were fetal.

Date Processed: 10-18-18, 11:35 AM
All 1,451 instances of SCP-5868-2 had tongues and eyes made from wood. Analyses showed the wood to belong to an unknown species in the Pinaceae family. In some instances, the wooden eyes appeared to have been roughly shoved into what was an empty socket while the cow was still living.

Date Processed: 01-27-19, 9:35 PM
All 946 instances of SCP-5868-2 were contaminated with human fecal matter, in many cases filling all cavities. Testing revealed that the feces showed signs of a purely beef-based diet. DNA testing showed the feces to have been produced by the employee who had been [DATAplease let me stop eating please i won't try to go just let me stop EXPUNGED] on 11-02-16.

Date Processed: 04-20-19, 4:35 PM
Each of the 1,097 instances of SCP-5868-2 were found to have six additional stomachs. Stomachs were found to be filled with an extremely acidic bile. Sixteen employees were injured, causing an unacceptable slowdown in processing. One employee was rendered unable to work following this batch.

Date Processed: 07-02-19, 7:35 PM
All 869 instances of SCP-5868-2 were found to be boneless. No other abnormalities were found.

Date Processed: 09-11-19, 10:35 PM
Delivery consisted of one living SCP-5868-2 instance. Employees were instructed to slaughter it with available tools. Instead of blood, beef-based gravy appeared to be flowing through the instance's veins. Processed as normal.

Date Processed: 03-04-20, 4:35 PM
All 1,365 instances of SCP-5868-2 had tightly woven barbed wire in place of bones and organs. The barbed wire was shown to have severe rust damage. Thirteen of the instances also lacked a tongue.

Date Processed: 07-19-20, 1:35 AM
All 971 instances of SCP-5868-2 were “inside-out,” with organs on the outside and skin on the inside. Instances were said to smell like “freshly-cut grass.”

Date Processed: 12-22-20, 5:35 AM
All 1,172 instances of SCP-5868-2 vocalized despite being clearly deceased. Vocalizations did not cease during or after processing. Vocalizations were described as a human attempting to sound like a cow.

Interview with William Gartley:

The following interview took place on 11-04-16 with William Gartley, shift manager of SCP-5868. During the interview, William Gartley was under the impression that it was a performance review given by a company adjudicator. No attempt was made to correct this.
Interviewer: This is all great, Bill. But could you please answer my question? About the first delivery?
WG: You mean the issue with—
I: Bill, you gotta rest easy. You're not being held accountable for the unsafe actions of one of your employees. You're fine. It's fine. This is about the first delivery you can remember. I think you understand what kind I'm talking about here.
WG: I'm not sure—
I: Tell me about the black truck, Bill. This isn't a request.
WG: Oh. You mean that truck?
I: Yes. It's what we're here to talk about. Not your performance. Not any workplace accidents. We want you to tell us everything you know about the truck.
WG: Is—is this a test?
I: It's fine for you to tell me about all of it and how you feel about it. Just this once. It's for archival purposes. This won't be marked on your personal record.
WG: Okay.
[ There is a thirty-two second pause. WG clears his throat. ]
WG: It just came one day. That's it. We didn't have any other deliveries.
[ There is a fourteen second pause. ]
WG: Corporate told us to accept it. Free meat. They didn't know what was causing it and told me not to worry about it. It was free meat. It came from nowhere. Miraculous, really.
I: This was before you noticed there was something wrong with the carcasses, right?
WG: There's nothing wrong with the carcasses.
I: It's okay, Bill. This isn't a trap. Just talk plainly with me.
WG: They—they knew the meat was wrong from the first. But, uh, corporate decided that using the meat would result in so much profit that the money used to settle suits would be a pittance.
I: They didn't realize how bad they were?
WG: I'm no expert.
[ There is a six second pause. ]
WG: It just made economical sense to use them. We had so many. And, well, we realized pretty quickly what happened when you didn't. Well, someone at corporate seemed to know.
I: Do you remember the person who let you know about that?
WG: You know, that's funny. But no. Honest. Not just saying that, either. There were so many higher-ups calling about the truck and the meat and the things that, well, you know. The meat sometimes did.
I: How long did they try to use the carcasses?
WG: It didn't take long. Even the leather gives you these horrible welts. There's some chemicals on them. I don't know. They're wrong.
I: Does it ever seem futile to you?
WG: What do you mean?
I: Just watching them pack the meat. Watching them tan the flesh and crush the bones into feed. And then, they burn it all. Does it seem futile?
[ There is a five second pause. ]
WG: Things need to get done. No matter what.
The rest of the interview contained no other information applicable to containment. William Gartley has remained the shift manager of SCP-5868. He has continued to be an exemplary employee.

« SCP-5867 | SCP-5868 | SCP-5869 »


close

Info

X
Thanks to Rounderhouse for critique.

Item #: SCP-5871
Object Class: Thaumiel
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5871 is maintained in a high-value item locker within Site-03. Usage requires authorization from both the Overseer Council and Ethics Committee.
Description: SCP-5871 is an obsidian ritual knife, with seven unpolished gems encrusting its handle.
The object was discovered in an anomalous burial site within modern-day Mongolia in 1831 and was created in 2020.
As a consequence, utilizing SCP-5871 to symbolically kill an entity (see Document 5871-REST for ritual details) will result in said target being destroyed retroactively. This has proven useful in the neutralization of several dangerous ontokinetic, metaphysical, and temporal anomalies.
Addendum 5871-1: History

Date
Event

April 1831
Artifact is discovered following a tip from an anonymous source.

June 1831
Artifact is shipped to Site-19 (then called Facility-C).

July 1831
Despite being slated for an SCP designation and testing, a clerical error results in relegation to bulk storage.

September 1944
Artifact is rediscovered during records digitization.

October 1944
SCP-5871 is designated and provisional testing begins.

December 1944
SCP-5871 is classed as Safe and placed in storage.

November 1963
Routine maintenance on the IntSCPFN file system reveals several anachronistic edits regarding SCP-5871. It is assumed to be a computer bug.

April 1980
Unknown agents (believed to be of the Chaos Insurgency) breach Site-19 and terminate SCP-048.

June 1980
As part of the incident report, Dr. Richard Myers theorizes the existence of "subtemporal" material. His work is highly controversial.

February 1983
SCP-5871 is relocated to the newly-created Site-03, and Dr. Patricia Carver is designated as project lead.

April 1983
Dr. Richard Myers is assigned to the SCP-5871 project.

May 1983
SCP-5871 is successfully used to neutralize a Keter-class anomaly.

June 1983
SCP-5871 is reclassed as Thaumiel.

January 1986
Dr. Richard Myers goes missing, presumed deceased.

November 2002
A large cache of obsidian is discovered in an undocumented area of Site-77.

December 2002
With recently-developed temporal displacement sensors, it is determined that the obsidian exhibits subtemporal properties.

April 2007
Re-analysis of several soil samples suggests SCP-5871's discovery site was retroactively contaminated.

May 2007
Subtemporal materials research begins at the prompting of O5-9.

February 2018
Project Oedipus is approved and launched.

August 2020
SCP-5871 is created. Project Oedipus is concluded, and all personnel are issued amnestics.

January 2021
Efforts to fully analyze SCP-5871's chronology begin.

April 2056
Agents of the Temporal Anomalies Department will plant SCP-5871 in its discovery site. (Planned)

November 2056
Mauna Loa volcano erupts, from which SCP-5871 material will be harvested. (Predicted)

This table will be updated as SCP-5871 chronology is better understood. Contact Researcher Agatha Myers for more information.
Addendum 5871-2: Incident 5871-62
A second, seemingly-identical instance of SCP-5871 was found in Area-313 Deep Storage. The HMCL Supervisor ordered that the object be returned to its unmarked crate, all records of the discovery be destroyed, and all personnel with knowledge of the incident be amnesticized.
O5-9 overrode the directive, instructing that the two anomalies be physically compared. The results of this analysis are attached below:
[LINK ERROR: File 6R0CF/7301567/SCP-5871/6084/8C not found.]

The above document was discovered in the most recent DEEPWELL backup of the IntSCPFN database. Its metadata claims it was filed by Site-03, a nonexistent Foundation facility.

More From This Author

More From This Author

aismallard's Works

SCPs

SCP-4447 •

SCP-4853 •

SCP-1294-J •

SCP-4781 •

SCP-5134 •

SCP-1047-J •

SCP-4322 •

SCP-5900 •

SCP-4339 •

SCP-3597 •

SCP-7558 •

SCP-5446 •

SCP-5502 •

SCP-5510 •

SCP-6115 •

Tales/GoI Formats

The Heart of the Beast •

The Pumpkin Mystery •

Stealing Something Else •

Continuous Integration •

Other

aismallard's personnel file •

« SCP-5870 | SCP-5871 | SCP-5872 »


Coming Soon - Malvarik

▸ More by this Author ◂

{$comments2}

F.A.Q.

{$doesthisfixthebug}

SCP-5873 in its deactivated state.
✖

Object Class: Safe Euclid Keter
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5873 is to be folded and stored within a standard safety locker in the Anomalous Items wing of Site-44. As SCP-5873's anomalous properties seem to demanifest when folded, it is advised to only unfold it for the purpose of testing sessions.
NOTE: CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES REVISED - CHECK REVISION 5873-1
REVISION 5873-1:
As of Incident 5873-1A, SCP-5873's Object Class has been upgraded to Euclid and it is to be placed in a High Impact Resistant Locker (H.I.R.L). Under no circumstances are any more testing sessions to be performed without authorization by the O5 Council. Immediately contact the nearest supervisor should you spontaneously develop any feelings of desire or obsession towards SCP-5873.
NOTE: CONTAINMENT PROCEDURES REVISED - CHECK REVISION 5873-2
REVISION 5873-2:
Shortly after Incident 5873-2A, SCP-5873 escaped Foundation custody and its current location is completely unknown. All forms of media have been delegated to MTF Delta-6 "Watchdogs" to observe for any signs of its appearance. Should it be located, they are to be dispatched immediately to intercept and capture. Object Class has been upgraded to Keter.
Description: SCP-5873 is the designation given to a pair of autonomous jeans that produce motion through anomalous means. A tag on the backside of the jeans reads,

Valizia

Autonomous Collection
Established 1854
"Stay Magical."

The fashion company in question, Valizia, is not mentioned in any Foundation records and no other goods from the "Autonomous Collection" have been found to date. An inquiry into the identity of this group is currently ongoing and a proposal to broach MC&D contacts on the subject has been put forth by the project lead, Dr. Henriks.
Recovery: SCP-5873 was discovered wandering Sutter Avenue in Brooklyn, New York on 02/06/2020. All individuals that witnessed SCP-5873 were administered Class-C Amnestics and a cover story relating to college students in the robotics program performing a prank was disseminated into the media. SCP-5873 did not offer any resistance when brought into Foundation custody.
Update 5873.1: After Incident 5873-1A, it became apparent that SCP-5873 possesses inordinate amounts of strength, durability, and speed upon being worn by an individual. SCP-5873 will immediately take off in a random direction after being donned and is capable of smashing through reinforced walls and other obstacles in its way. While SCP-5873 was recovered, various Site-44 personnel involved with the anomaly began displaying mounting obsession with SCP-5873 that was only resolved through termination. An ongoing study into this phenomenon is being conducted by Dr. Charles, the successor to Dr. Henriks, by immediate order of the O5 Council.

Addendum 5873.1
Incident Log 5873-1A : 02.09.2020

▼ Click to confirm credentials ▼

▲ Hide Addendum ▲

PERSONNEL INVOLVED: D-12170, Dr. Henriks, Assistant Researcher Woods, and Assistant Researcher Adams.
5873
STATUS: Concluded
TIME: 1:30 PM (local time) February 9th, 2020.
DISRUPTION CLASS: Dark

INCIDENT SUMMARY: SCP-5873 was removed from its storage for a testing session conducted by Dr. Henriks and his research assistants, Adams and Woods. When unfolded and placed onto the floor of the testing room, SCP-5873 became animated and proceeded to pace around the room, occasionally bumping into objects or personnel. D-12170 was instructed to put on SCP-5873 and detail any effects he might feel.
Approximately twenty seconds after being put on, SCP-5873 proceeded to launch itself through the nearest reinforced wall with complete disregard for the safety of its occupant. Assistant Researcher Adams was immediately killed by a piece of shrapnel, with both Dr. Henriks and Assistant Researcher Woods injured by pieces of flying debris. SCP-5873 then ran through over five more containment cell walls, resulting in a containment breach that lasted over five hours. Foundation personnel later recovered SCP-5873 in a section of woods outside the facility, no remains of D12170's corpse held within.

NOTE: I am putting forth a request to be placed into quarantine. Since the breach, I've begun to notice a involuntary attraction towards SCP-5873 within myself that cannot be ignored. I hypothesize this to be a cognitohazardous effect produced by SCP-5873 in order for it to gain a new wearer. I believe that this ability had not yet manifested when it first came into our possession as it had not yet been worn. In any case, I have also recommended Dr. Charles to be my successor in the study of this anomaly, as he is an expert on items with such anomalous effects.
- Dr. Henriks.

Addendum 5873.2
Incident Log 5873-2A : 02.14.2020

▼ Click to confirm credentials ▼

▲ Hide Addendum ▲

PERSONNEL INVOLVED: Dr. Henriks, Assistant Researcher Woods, and Dr. Charles.
STATUS: Ongoing
TIME: 6:30 AM (local time) February 14th, 2020.
DISRUPTION CLASS: Ekhi

INCIDENT SUMMARY: Without proper authorization or clearance, Assistant Researcher Woods secretly released Dr. Henriks from his confinement. They both proceeded to bludgeon Dr. Charles into unconsciousness in his office before stealing his key-card, gaining access to SCP-5873. Video footage shows them arguing, presumably over who would get to wear SCP-5873 first. It is at this time that Foundation personnel proceeded to open fire on the pair, killing Assistant Researcher Woods and wounding Dr. Henriks.
However, Dr. Henriks was able to put on SCP-5873 before Foundation personnel could apprehend him. Its anomalous effects activated and SCP-5873 escaped after breaking through the front entrance. Foundation personnel lost sight of the anomaly within the wilderness of Northern Quebec and it is believed to still be running. Both Dr. Henriks' corpse and SCP-5873's whereabouts are unknown.

« SCP-5872 | SCP-5873 | SCP-5874 »


close

Info

X

94.67%
(+71)
5.33%
(-4)

-%
(+0)
-%
(-0)

Item#: 5874

Level5

Containment Class:
safe

Secondary Class:
none

Disruption Class:
vlam

Risk Class:
notice

link to memo

SCP-5874's interior

Special Containment Procedures: Audio emitted from SCP-5874 is to be ignored. Any proclamations made by SCP-5874 are false.
The names of personnel assigned to SCP-5874 have been expunged from the Foundation database. Affected individuals are not to be briefed on standard Foundation ethical practices under any circumstances. All surviving members of the Department of Human Resources are to be administered Type G viral amnestics.The Type G amnestic is used to remove all nomenclative attributes from a given Name, effectively erasing it and all duplicate Names from existence and allowing a new one to take its place. These new Names effectively allow for the reprogramming of an individual on a basis that even the oldest nomenclative magiks and memetics cannot undo. ~Dr. Koda Raynes Phd., "On Amnestics, a Guide from the Forgetful to You!" and assigned to another Site.
The door leading to SCP-5874 has been thaumaturgically sealed, and all personnel at Site-83 have been administered Type D amnestics in order to remove any memories of/relating to the Department of Human Resources.
The corridor leading to SCP-5874 has been topologically displaced. At its new location SCP-5874 has been obstructed via concrete, C4 plastic explosives, and a patrolling squad of armed personnel to deter exploration from Foundation personnel or civilians. Any individuals that bypass all established measures, including security clearances, are to be terminated upon re-emergence. All others are to be considered lost to the anomaly.

Description

SCP-5874 is the former West Corridor D of Site-83 which contains the Department of Human Resources. SCP-5874 is topologically inconsistent. Rooms will shift places with one another at random intervals every day, occasionally resulting in doors that lead to solid walls, windows that open to other windows, and hallways that lead outside of the anomaly.
SCP-5874 is considered sapient and hostile. It will use a variety of tactics to lure individuals into it through the use of a wide variety of auditory hallucinations..This is not a compulsory effect, as memetic screenings on personnel who have heard these auditory hallucinations proved that they were unaffected by memes, anti-memes, or compulsions at the time.. These tactics have a varying degree of success. Hallucinations heard include, but are not limited to;

A distressed call for help, typically from a feminine voice.
The voice of a loved one attempting to persuade an individual to enter.
The voice of a superior ranking Foundation employee, generally believed to be a member of the O5-Council, demanding audience within SCP-5874.

While within SCP-5874 subjects will be assaulted by hostile concepts (designated SCP-5874-1) that will attempt to alter their way of thinking. Affected subjects are prone to spontaneous outbursts of malicious and violent intent, and will often attempt to torture unaffected individuals if given the chance. Curiously, affected subjects still claim to be loyal to the Foundation.Individuals who enter SCP-5874 believe that they have been assigned to the Department of Human Resources for the entirety of their Foundation career, although the department never existed according to Foundation history., despite not adhering to current Foundation ethical practices.
All affected subjects have displayed vitriolic disdain for personnel assigned to the Ethics Committee.
Several vacant rooms were discovered within SCP-5874 that were intended for torture or inhumane experimentation. The following is a documented account of the general layout of SCP-5874.

A room filled with various medieval torture instruments. Bloodstains and viscera are unable to be removed or cleaned through unknown anomalous means. SCP-5874-1 is heavily prevalent in this room.
A room labeled "Storage". An unknown amount of human bodies (many more than should have been able to fit in the space) have been crowded within. Faces, teeth, fingers, and toes have been removed from each body. Despite taking up the entirety of the room, more bodies can be observed manifesting inside every hour.
A room with a placard reading "Inventory" above the doorway. While the room itself is inaccessible, there is a viewport in the door that allows one to see several skeletons dressed in standard D-Class attire within.

Discovery

SCP-5874 was initially discovered in 2008 during the containment of SCP-173, although due to a failure of communication between the containment team and classification committee, SCP-5874 would not be classified until May of 2020. Until 2020, no one knew that all individuals assigned to Site-83 were affected by SCP-5874, allowing it to operate unhindered for twelve years.
On May 4th, 2020, Level 4 Researcher Lois Haas entered SCP-5874 and immediately became subject to its effects. Researcher Haas has a long history of loyal dedication to the Foundation, serving for 15 years.
The stark alteration of personality in Researcher Haas warranted an investigation into the Department of Human Resources, leading to the discovery and anomalous classification of SCP-5874. Researcher Haas was quarantined in a Standard Humanoid Containment Cell as a preemptive measure to counter potential memetic effects.

Interview Researcher Haas

The following interview was conducted by Researcher Umar Hadid shortly after Researcher Haas's apprehension.

Interviewer: Researcher Umar Hadid
Interviewed: Researcher Lois Haas

<Begin Log>
Researcher Hadid: State your name for the record.
Researcher Haas: Lois Haas, Department of Human Resources concierge.
Hadid: The, uh, record shows us something different, Mrs. Haas.
Haas: Oh? I've been in H.R. since, well, forever.
Hadid: [ Flipping through files. ] Do you remember ever working with Dr. Allegre or Site Director Alaina Chin?
[ Researcher Haas shakes her head. ]
Hadid: Do you remember anything about Site-83? People? Rooms?
Haas: The break room's always a hot mess. Probably those slobs from Ethics. But besides that, nothing really stands out. I know that Chin's brother's contained here, but I've forgotten where exactly. And of course everyone from H.R.
Hadid: I see. Do you remember what you do for work then? Like at H.R., what goes on there?
Haas: [ She laughs. ] You must be new.
Hadid: [ Nervous chuckle. ] You could say that. I just recently got promoted from Junior Researcher to Level 1.
Haas: Oh, congratulations man.
Hadid: Thanks. It's been uh… rough, to say the least.
Haas: You're telling me.
[ Silence ]
Hadid: So, H.R.?
Haas: You know the D-Class? We're the ones who pluck them from the prisons, and off the streets, places where people only get to if they've got no one left that'll miss 'em. Hell, a few of them come from our ranks too. Those are the real pieces of work. The bodies don't come out of nowheres after all. And then there's the testing. Or there was the testing.
Hadid: What do you mean?
Haas: Well, before someone grew a conscience, we would run tests here. You know, do real fucking science. And you can't make the omelet of discovery without breaking a few eggs, and a few bones. But someone thought that was inhumane. Thought that sending unarmed D-Class into an anomalous meat grinder to see how it works was a needless waste of life. Pathetic.
Hadid: You're talking about the-
Haas: Jeremiah Cimmerian, and all those other pretend doctors in Ethics.
[ Researcher Hadid coughs before rifling through his papers again. Researcher Haas leans forward in her chair so that her elbows can reach the table. She slams her open palm down. Hadid drops his papers and looks at her. ]
Haas: You're not… from Ethics. Right?
Hadid: I… no… I… I'm not.
Haas: Good.
[ Silence ]
Haas: If you don't have any more questions for me, Researcher, I have tests to conduct.
[ Researcher Hadid tilts his head. ]
Hadid: You'll be returned… to your cell though. What tests do you plan on conducting, exactly?
Haas: You'll see. You're a Level 1 researcher now. Time to put your big boy drawers on.
<End Log>

Following this interview, Researcher Haas was escorted to her cell by an armed guard. Security forces were tripled for three weeks, during which Haas was stoic and inactive. Due to the lack of activity from Haas, the extra force was deemed unnecessary and the additional personnel were returned to their previous posts.

The Human Resources Incident

On August 2nd, 2020, Researcher Haas etched several thaumaturgic sigils.Later identified to be transportation spells used by the Hermetic Order of the Black Trees. into the wall of her containment cell using her fingernails, allowing her to escape confinement. The following recording was pieced together from the various CCTVs in Site-83.

<PLAY RECORDING>
12:03: Haas etches sigils into the wall using her fingernails. A circular section of the wall crumbles, replaced by a glowing green light. Haas steps through unnoticed by guards.
12:04: Haas appears on another side of the containment cell, sneaks up on a guard. She disarms him and uses the pistol to kill him and the other guards. Haas proceeds down West Corridor A.
12:10: Researcher Hadid exits the interrogation chamber. Haas subdues and takes him hostage. Haas and Hadid proceed down West Corridor B.
12:11: Researcher Hadid escapes Haas's grip. Hadid hits an emergency panic button. Alarms blare. Personnel flood corridor. Hadid escapes Haas in the chaos. Haas fires shots into the ceiling. Personnel attempt to flee.
12:13: Haas holds Site Director Chin at gunpoint. They proceed down West Corridor C and enter SCP-5874.
12:15: MTF Lambda 5 secure SCP-5874. L5-Alpha attempts negotiations with Haas. D-Class are sent in. There are screams heard from the D-Class. Site Director Chin is released.
[THREE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES EXTRANEOUS NOISE REMOVED]
17:25: Screams cease.
<STOP RECORDING>

Interview Director Chin

In order to ascertain the full extent of the cognitive damage done by SCP-5874 on Site Director Chin several psychological screenings were conducted. After Site Director Chin was deemed lucid enough for conversation, an interview was conducted in order to better understand how SCP-5874 affects the mind. Site Director Chin was later amnesticized, her name was removed, and she was reassigned to Site-[REDACTED].

Interviewer: Researcher Hadid
Interviewed: Site-Director Chin
<Begin Log>
Chin: What exactly do you think you're doing, Hadid?
Hadid: I'm…
Chin: You understand how heavily you have to screw up to think that I'm affected by an anomaly? Me? Site-Director Chin? Maybe you belong in the Ethics Committee. Research clearly isn't for you.
Hadid: What do you have against the Ethics Committee?
Chin: We have a burden to carry, Hadid. Most of us will carry it for our entire lives, long or short as that may be. And some people aren't prepared to shoulder their portion of the load. So they put more of a burden on people like us. People that want to do the work and get the answers. Why?
Hadid: I don't know.
Chin: Because they're scared of what they might find if they dig a little too deep. That's what the Ethics Committee is. They're sandstone at the bottom of the sea bed, keeping the people with plastic shovels from finding real gems. And I want those gems, Hadid. I'm sure you do too.
<End Log>

Observation 5874-1

In the days following Site Director Chin's detainment, personnel gained access to the CCTV cameras within SCP-5874. Several more employees disappeared into SCP-5874 in part due to SCP-5874's anomalous effects, and in part due to Haas herself, who was able to convince a large portion Site-83's staff to enter the anomaly. Due to the threat SCP-5874 poses on the human mind, exploration into the anomaly was prohibited by the Ethics Committee.

ROOM 4AC
<PLAY FOOTAGE>
17:00 Dr. Character drags a D-Class by the collar of his uniform. D-Class protests. D-Class is forced into a "t" shaped wooden contraption by Dr. Character and an armed MTF agent.
17:01: Researcher Haas activates the contraption. Each end of the contraption begins rotating in different directions. D-Class screams.
17:04: Researcher Haas takes notes. D-Class's left arm is torn. MTF Agent laughs.
17:10: D-Class's head turns, breaking bones. Skin is stretched and pulled until it peels apart. Muscle and sinew are revealed. D-Class struggles in restraints while Researcher Haas documents. MTF Agent leans against the machine. They put their face close to the D-Class.
18:15: D-Class's head separates from body. Researcher Haas scoffs then exits.

Observation 5874-2

ROOM 311A
<PLAY FOOTAGE>
15:04: Researcher Haas enters, followed by two D-Class. MTF Agents follow with weapons raised.
15:05: The D-Class are restrained to different chairs. MTF Agents line up against westward-facing wall with weapons aimed at the D-Class.
15:10: Researcher Haas makes note of responses. She nods once. MTF Agents fire a volley of shots into the first D-Class. Second D-Class hysterical.
15:14: MTF Agents reload. Dir. Chin takes notes of second D-Class responses.
15:17: Researcher Haas converses with remaining D-Class. D-Class remains hysterical, but Researcher Haas nods.
15:20: MTF Agents finish reloading. Researcher Haas recedes to northward-facing wall and nods. MTF Agents fire a volley of shots into the D-Class. Second D-Class expires.
15:21: MTF Agents reload.
15:30: Researcher Haas pours unknown red substance on first D-Class. First D-Class reanimates and foams at mouth.
15:35: MTF Agents finish reloading and fire at reanimated D-Class.
[EXPERIMENT LOOPS AND CEASES]

Observation 5874-3

ROOM 4AA
12:00: Four D-Class enter, gather around unknown, circular artifact, presumably an undocumented SCP object.
12:05: MTF Agents enter, followed by Researcher Haas.
12:06: Researcher Haas divides the D-Class into two groups. Fifth D-Class is terminated by MTF Agents.
12:09: Researcher Haas presents soccer ball to D-Class. MTF Agents set up nets on either side of the room.
12:15: Soccer game begins.
12:45: Soccer game concludes. Losing D-Class pair is terminated by MTF Agents.
12:46: Remaining D-Class are presented with a coin. Researcher Haas presents the coin to first D-Class, nods, then flips the coin.
12:47: Coin lands on "tails". Second D-Class is terminated.
12:50: Doctor Haas shakes hand of surviving D-Class. The door opens. D-Class exits and is shot by MTF Agents waiting outside.

The Second Incident

By November 11th, 2020, Researcher Haas was able to convince 67% of Site-83's personnel to enter SCP-5874. The affected personnel continued to kidnap unaffected individuals and conduct a variety of inhumane experiments on them. Due to the shortage of on-site personnel, several of the Euclid and Keter Class anomalies were understaffed and subsequently breached containment. MTF Lambda-5 attempted to combat the affected individuals and prevent the complete destruction of Site-83.
The following audio/visual recording was taken from various members of both MTF teams.

<BEGIN FOOTAGE>
L5-Alpha: It's a beautiful day to save lives. How's the arm, Cordae?
L5-Gamma: [ He moves his mechanical arm. He smiles. ] Better.
L5-Beta: Thank god for that. Captain?
L5-Alpha: Tits up, folks. We're going in.
[ Team proceeds through Site-83's West-Wing breakroom. The kitchen is in disarray with dirty pots and pans scattered across the floor. Human bones and dried viscera are present in the pans. Appears cooked. A still-beating human heart is on one of the tables. A researcher is documenting it and taking notes. ]
Researcher: Absolutely fascinating, isn't it? Are you here to bring me more D-Class for endoscopic vascular observation?
[ L5-Alpha looks at L5-Beta, who then looks at L5-Gamma. L5-Alpha fires a non-lethal, 5 milliamp taser shot at the researcher. Taser trackers connect at the chest. Researcher is subdued. ]
L5-Alpha: Don't make 'em like they used to, huh.
[ Team advances through Site-83, subduing affected researchers and staff in a similar manner. There are a multitude of burn marks through the site, presumably from the release of SCP-[REDACTED]. The fire suppressant systems seem to have failed. ]
[ Researcher Haas is discovered in West Corridor B. She is pursuing a D-Class with an instance of SCP-[REDACTED]. Instance is in hostile state and attempting to harm the D-Class. D-Class runs toward Lambda 5. ]
D-Class: She's fucking crazy man. Crazy!
[ L5-Beta and L5-Gamma successfully neutralize the instance using ballistic rounds. They hold Researcher Haas at gunpoint. ]
L5-Alpha: [ To her. ] Calm down. We've got this under control. Just keep running that way until you find someone who cares that isn't busy, or infected with whatever the fuck is going on here.
D-Class: Fuck you! I'm outta here.
[ The D-Class exits. Seconds later screams are heard. ]
L5-Gamma: [ He laughs. ]
L5-Alpha: [ To Haas. ] Stop your shit, Lois. I don't want to hurt you.
Haas: I'm trying to get work done. Work that you couldn't even begin to understand.
L5-Alpha: I've been through some ridiculous shit, Haas. We all have. Don't talk to me about something I couldn't understand.
Haas: Look, I get it. You're all young and new. You want the world to be made of sunshine and rainbows. You want our research to be more humane. You want the D-Class to be treated like people.
L5 Beta: Ma'am, we-
Haas: Did you know that the "D" in D-Class stands for disposable? It's literally in the name. Disposable Class. How about that, huh?
L5 Alpha: Listen Lois, just-
[ There is a tearing sound as Haas begins scratching something into her forearm. She rips through her lab coat sleeve and tears into her skin. Blood is present. Large portions of Haas's forearm muscle detach from her, although she does not acknowledge this. Haas's eyes begin to illuminate a shade of green. ]
L5-Gamma: Captain?
[ L5-Alpha nods. L5-Gamma fires his taser but misses. Researcher Haas's eyes cease to glow and she flees. She is pursued by the team. Haas enters SCP-5874 followed by L5-Alpha. ]
L5-Alpha: Stay here and make sure no one follows us.
[ L5-Alpha enters SCP-5874. The hall is lit by a faint red glow. Dried blood and fecal matter are present on the walls, ceiling and floor. There are iron doors.Consistent with humanoid containment cells during the early 2000's. with cylindrical indents within them. Diagonal patterns evident of scratching are also present on the walls and floors. ]
Haas: [ Over intercorm ] Is this insubordination, soldier?
L5-Alpha: You don't have any authority anymore, Haas. No one else is coming.
Haas: I'll report you to the O5s if you take another step.
L5-Alpha: Go ahead. I'll be here.
[ L5-Alpha traces some kind of sigil into the fresh viscera on a nearby wall. Haas emerges further down the corridor and runs to L5-Alpha. Haas examines the sigils. ]
Haas: What have you done?
[ Silence ]
Haas: Do you have any idea as to what you've just done to us?
[ Several rooms begin to displace, appearing on the ceiling and floor as opposed to just the wall. Window panes shatter and reform. Researcher Haas loses her balance. ]
[ A thick grey liquid manifests from the cracks in the floor. Liquid solidifies within seconds. ]
Haas: How did you…
L5-Alpha: My mother was in the Order. I'm just doing my job.
Footage terminates
<END FOOTAGE>

Following the termination of L5-Alpha's bodycam footage, the hall leading into West Corridor D and SCP-5874 were spontaneously filled with concrete. West Corridor D was later relocated, and the current containment protocols were enacted.

« SCP-5873 | SCP-5874 | SCP-5875 »


Item #: SCP-5875
Object Class: Euclid (formerly Safe)
Special Containment Procedures: Original Containment Procedures (19/11/2016)
Mail addressed to Foundation employees is to be checked before delivery for signs of being an SCP-5875-1 instance. All SCP-5875-1 documents are to be stored in opaque containers in a secure documents locker. Future activities of the Pataphysics Department must be closely reviewed for anomalous effects.
Additional Procedures, Emergency Revision 14 (26/06/2017)
Any unsolicited physical mail to a Foundation employee from an organization known to be fictional must be seized unread and stored as an SCP-5875-2 instance. Site security are to report and develop countermeasures for any anomalous mail delivery attempts.
Additional Procedures, Current Revision
Employees deemed to be sufficiently loyal to the Foundation may be granted permission to read SCP-5875-2 instances addressed to them. These employees must document all proficiencies gained, unplanned travel, and any other anomalous effects occurring after reading the correspondence.
Description: SCP-5875 is an organization of sapient, information-based entities existing between pataphysically linked universes, known as the "Good Times Resolution Club." SCP-5875 has the stated goal of "Promoting happier endings."

+ Contextual Information for understanding the nature of SCP-5875

- Close

Universes are said to be pataphysically linked if one is represented in the other as a fictional narrative or scenario conceived of by a sapient entity. These universes are arranged along a specific pataphysical dimension. When an individual conceives of a non-real scenario, an information packet representing that scenario emanates out of their universe and travels downwards in the pataphysical dimension before attaching itself to a nascent universe with low information content, bringing about the imagined scenario in that universe. Additionally, it is also possible for a universe to emit information upwards, which an individual in a pataphysically higher universe can receive as an idea for a hypothetical scenario or narrative. The pataphysical mechanism is an interplay of information travelling in both directions, a cycle of the creator actualizing events in the universe and being inspired by that universe. One result of this is is that SCP-5875's world is constantly exposed to narrative information passing between universes.

The Foundation first encountered SCP-5875 after 13/11/2016 when a Pataphysics Department research team attempted to send a probe into the space below our universe along the pataphysical dimension. It is believed that this created some manner of informational aperture through which SCP-5875 can interact with our universe. SCP-5875 is capable of interacting with baseline reality by causing the anomalous manifestation of letters addressed to Foundation personnel (Similar to the way SCP-1020, and SCP-1269 communicates with their targets). They almost always entreat the recipient's assistance in some manner of task SCP-5875 is trying to accomplish. These letters come in two varieties, designated SCP-5875-1 and SCP-5875-2.
SCP-5875-1 instances are written in the language the recipient is most familiar with. However, the language is heavily broken: the authors of the letters seem to have a very poor grasp of syntax, with words, phrases, clauses, and punctuation used and arranged erratically. Despite this, the meaning of the letters is generally understandable, though with difficulty. No SCP-5875-1 instance has ever recognizably explained how its recipient can help SCP-5875 should they decide to.
On 25/06/2017, the following SCP-5875-1 instance was found in the mail of the SCP-5875 containment lead:

The Good Times" Resolution Club this saying=
Hey Friendations!
We just don't get it, do we? Punching that circle bush no, us mistakered. Asking for some help hand; and no? Thought rudemanding -us/thee? Our intented can"t they comprehense? Yalls language tough on us'.; arcane form and perfect structure mandate clutchold all the meaning so it won"t sink in space. Spacesuits for thinks [Idea Astronauts]. We do'nt make em like you, mostly needn"t. Our helpless caused of this? Slightly real, but not out of whole cloth;'. The big real = no ticket down. Taking other look we reckonize you can't dive down for talk at us. Being through your lovely seenarios-/-narratevents all the time, we"re reasoning you could just think-all down here. Right though not - like your thinks need wordsuits, you need spaceships.
Club Scigentists fresh made idea. Language good, brainships doublegood. Bye-Bye.

This was the last SCP-5875-1 instance recorded1. It was initially concluded that this meant that SCP-5875 had recognized that recipients of their letters were unable to aid them, and that their species finds syntax challenging because they aren't accustomed to encoding their communication in language, likely because they communicate in terms of pure intent through some form of telepathy2.
On 26/06/2017, the first SCP-5875-2 instance was received. Addressed to a Site-87 researcher, it was not removed by existing SCP-5875 containment procedures due to its dissimilarity with SCP-5875-1 instances. The researcher was seen on security camera reading it, before laying on the ground and falling unconscious. Another researcher connected the incident to SCP-5875. Subsequently, SCP-5875 was quickly reclassified as Euclid and its containment procedures were revised. However, after the researcher had regained consciousness and spent two weeks under controlled examination to ensure they suffered no adverse effects in the long-term, it was decided that SCP-5875-2 recipients should be allowed to read their instances under controlled conditions, leading to the current revision of the containment procedures.
SCP-5875-2 instances are letters that purport to be from a fictional organization, generally from a fairly widely known fictional universe. When examined with a Pickman-Sinclair Narrative Fluctuation Detector, SCP-5875-2 instances read as strongly expositional, and in particular are strongly associated with the "Call to Adventure" phase of the Hero's Journey or Monomyth. Unlike SCP-5875-1 instances, their language is easily intelligible and well constructed; it is believed that this is because they're constructed using human-made narrative information as a basis, instead of being written by SCP-5875 members from scratch.
These letters describe a problem that is appropriate to the organization, and never make reference to SCP-5875 by name. When an SCP-5875-2 instance is read by the individual to whom it is addressed, the individual feels the immediate need to sit or lay down in a place where it is safe to do so. Once they do this, they fall unconscious for a period ranging from 30-60 minutes. Upon waking, they recall arriving in a surreal world inhabited by the species SCP-5875's membership is composed of, designated SCP-5875-A. SCP-5875-A instances are perceived as having inconsistent, shifting appearances, but being generally humanoid. Once there, they recall aiding a group of SCP-5875 members3 with a problem that is thematically similar to the one described in the SCP-5875-2 instance, and awakening shortly after the mission concluded4. Pataphysics department personnel who have been recruited in this fashion characterize the world as a complex and chaotic combination of narrative devices and worldbuilding elements from the enormous amount of narrative information passing through the area SCP-5875-A lives in. Affected personnel also report acquiring new skills and proficiencies upon waking. These also are generally thematically relevant for the fictional organization their instance was purportedly from.
The world SCP-5875-A lives in is not actually a universe and does not exist materially. However, as it is made up of information that emulates a universe, a disembodied human consciousness experiences and navigates it as if it were a universe they are physically present in. Further, a human consciousness' informational and conceptual superstructure is much more resilient to external influence than those of SCP-5875-A, giving humans a greater resistance to hazards that threaten SCP-5875-A instances5. This is why SCP-5875 considers human help valuable on certain potentially hazardous missions.
Multiple affected personnel, including the first Foundation employee to be affected by an SCP-5875-2 instance, report that while they have always arrived pataphysically below our universe, they have heard SCP-5875 members refer to a top or above branch of their organization. As SCP-5875 members located pataphysically above our universe could manipulate the incoming narrative information that determines events in our universe, it has been decided that the Foundation should create and maintain a positive relationship with SCP-5875 by responding to their requests.
What follows is a partial list of received SCP-5875-2 instances, and the results of their reading.
SCP-5875-2-02:

Fictional Organization: VFD (A Series of Unfortunate Events)
Excerpt from Letter: "… in a villainous flagrance of duty, some among our members have exposed one of our library sanctums to the elements, a word which here means…"
Problem Faced: One of SCP-5875's data storage units had its informational shielding damaged such that the surrounding information flow could corrupt or overwrite the data if not corrected. Interacting with such unshielded storage units can be hazardous for SCP-5875-A instances, but was substantially safer for the recruited Foundation archivist.
Skills Gained: Knowledge in the fields of cryptography and fire fighting techniques.

SCP-5875-2-05:

Fictional Organization: Starfleet, The United Federation of Planets (Star Trek)
Excerpt from Letter: "…located in a remote area of the Beta Quadrant, scans suggest this planet has extensive dilithium deposits. However, the Romulan Star Empire has learned of it as well…"
Problem Faced: A region rich in unbound narrative devices, which SCP-5875's species can mine and make tools out of, was discovered by SCP-5875. However, another group known as The Cowboys, whose relationship with SCP-5875 is tense and antagonistic but not actively hostile, also learned about the region, and SCP-5875 wished to secure their claim to the area first. The recruited Foundation guard was meant to avert potential conflicts with the Cowboys using intimidation.
Skills Gained: Theoretical and practical understanding of Foundation Faster-Than-Light drives, varied geopolitical information that gave them a more positive view of human civilization's future prospects.

SCP-5875-2-10:

Fictional Organization: The Resistance (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)
Excerpt from Letter: "…Do not be lulled into complacency, this twilight that has fallen on Hyrule is unnatural and dangerous. But with your help, we can do something about it…"
Problem Faced: Many among the SCP-5875-A populace noticed an unusual increase in tragic, hopeless, and melancholic elements in passing narratives and narrative fragments. While investigating the phenomenon, SCP-5875 learned that a notorious SCP-5875-A organized crime syndicate was responsible, draining the passing information of positive, optimistic, and just themes and plot developments. Their goal was to draw energy from these drained qualities, but also to promote an environment in their own world that would be more conducive to their own future success. SCP-5875 and the Foundation MTF agent were able to shut down the operation and return the taken elements to their original narratives.
Skills Gained: Skill at fighting with a broadsword and shield, knowledge of several hostile extradimensional and/or pluripotent entities known to periodically reincarnate after being defeated.

SCP-5875-2-14:

Fictional Organization: S.H.I.E.L.D. (Marvel Comics)
Excerpt from Letter: "… the man is believed to have accidentally fallen into a chemical vat in a biochemical research facility, granting him metahuman ability. The purpose behind his current rampage is unclear, but he must be stopped in any case…"
Problem Faced: A criminal on the run from SCP-5875-A law enforcement for destroying a vehicle they had stolen for a joyride broke into an SCP-5875 research facility. Inside, they were inadvertently exposed to a powerful generalized MacGuffin, granting them a much greater control over the information comprising their environment. They used this ability to strike back at law enforcement and random bystanders until SCP-5875 agents and the recruited Foundation criminologist neutralized and arrested them.
Skills Gained: Knowledge of techniques used to engage with humanoids with anomalous capabilities as used by several different groups of interest.

SCP-5875-2-19:

Fictional Organization: Oberon's Court (A Midsummer Night's Dream)
Excerpt from Letter: "…saw I that Thalia, Muse of comedy, walked in that field when she imagined a tale of such surpassing humor that she wept from laughter. And noted I where her tears fell, for now grow there strange flowers. The juice of them on pond'ring heads laid will grant man or woman the merry wit of seven fools. Pray fetch me this herb, and the fair folk's night will be lightened…"
Problem Faced: SCP-5875 researchers forecasted that a particularly humorous joke or event presented widely to the populace at a certain upcoming time would be emotionally beneficial to an exceptionally high number of SCP-5875-A in a difficult or painful low point in their personal narrative. In response, several SCP-5875 members and the recruited Foundation junior researcher collected and refined several components of joke narratives (set-up, double entendre, word-play, punchline, etc.) and synthesized them into a comedic skit. The junior researcher described the skit as an extremely dense and complex piece of referential humor, and consequently reported "not getting it." It was clearly well received by the populace, however.
Skills Gained: Greater ability to recognize and correct misunderstandings that could lead to interpersonal conflicts, a general sense of being funnier and more articulate.

SCP-5875-2-23:

Fictional Organization: Earth Defense Force (Godzilla)
Excerpt from Letter: "…the monster Megaguirus has resurfaced and is projected to arrive in Osaka. So called 'defender' monsters like Godzilla or Mothra are nowhere to be found, this is humanity's fight alone. With your support, we can defend Osaka and drive the monster back…"
Problem Faced: A metastatic meme complex, a complex system of memes and concepts that behaves much like a predatory life form by consuming and subsuming other ideas, concepts, or information into itself, somehow exited the human noosphere,6 arrived in SCP-5875-A's world, and began consuming its informational content. This included information making up residential and metropolitan areas. An alliance of SCP-5875 forces, the recruited Foundation memeticist, and several Cowboys were able to destroy the core of the complex, rendering it inert and effectively dead. Fortunately, all of the SCP-5875-A instances and most of the environmental information consumed by the complex were able to be extracted from it and restored. The Foundation memeticist suffered serious psychic injury in the conflict and was brought to an SCP-5875-A hospital to repair her mental information structure, using both direct manipulation of the information and therapeutic memetic agents.
Skills Gained: Protocols and methodology for responding to Large Scale Aggressor-type anomalous entities and non-anomalous natural disasters. Additionally, she gained a basic understanding of SCP-5875-A medical techniques while being treated, and is working on developing them for use by humans.

SCP-5875-2-33:

Fictional Organization: The PAC Institute (The PAC Institute Wiki)
Excerpt from Letter: "… a severe memetic anomaly has manifested approximately 30 miles from your location; over 100 civilians have already been hospitalized and it poses a major threat of breaching the veil. It is understood that SRT Xi-14 (Mindsweepers) is on assignment, but your support is requested if at all possible…"
Problem Faced: A highly unusual narrative began passing through SCP-5875-A's world. Its content was deeply unpleasant, graphically portraying humanity's subjugation and eradication by an enormously powerful entity of unclear origin and nature. This was portrayed in a manner that indicated the creator of the narrative found these events pleasing and desirable. SCP-5875-A instances who tried to modify the narrative information to create a more positive outcome or destroy the narrative entirely suffered severe psychic damage and had to be hospitalized, leading to mass panic among the populace. SCP-5875 members and the recruited Foundation containment specialist were able to relocate and contain the narrative in order to prevent it from harming SCP-5875-A society. Notably, the narrative has a highly atypical informational structure that suggests the creator of the narrative is not human, but its presence in a region dominated by human-made narratives suggests that the creator is on Earth. A Foundation investigation to determine the identity and location of this narrative's creator is ongoing.
Skills Gained: Even greater knowledge of Foundation containment theory and practice throughout history, a basic understanding of the field of pataphysics as the Foundation currently understands it.7

SCP-5875-2-47:

Fictional Organization: The Ghostbusters (Ghostbusters)
Excerpt from Letter: "Have you ever dealt with powerful specters? Could you fight a ghost afflicted by an abomination holding it between life and death? If such an apparition were corrupting our city, could you aid us? If the answer is yes, then don't wait another minute, pick up a phone and call. We're ready to recruit you!"
Problem Faced: An anomalous phenomenon that distorted the information comprising SCP-5875-A's world was spreading in a remote area near an SCP-5875 training facility. The distortions were of a consistent nature, described by the recruited pataphysics researcher as causing stationary objects and terrain to be "covered in black thorns." While searching for the source of the phenomenon, several abnormalities in the topography and topology of the area suggested portions of the terrain had been erased, but contacted geographers who study the area did not recall the area being different in the past. What occurred after this is unknown; upon waking the visibly frightened researcher quickly wrote a note reading "If they're still there, you won." He then immediately contacted Pataphysics Department archivist and general assistant Enkidu.aic and demanded an amnestic and memetic agent regimen to erase the climax of the most recent narrative he was a part of from his memory, in order to avoid breaking the generalized LUCID CHALICE Protocol. Department monitoring equipment and subsequent SCP-5875-2 instances confirm that SCP-5875 and its world still exist.
Skills Gained: None

Footnotes
1. Earlier, more typical SCP-5875-1 instances are not included in the basic SCP-5875 file as they have been deemed unimportant to a basic understanding of the anomaly; interested personnel should refer to the SCP-5875-1 supplemental document.
2. This has since been confirmed.
3. Foundation Personnel should note that only a subset of the SCP-5875-A population are members of the SCP-5875 organization
4. How time passes in SCP-5875-A's world is not well understood, affected personnel report having no clear sense of how long they spent there. Further, affected personnel always arrive in time to assist with the relevant problem, even if it had been several days after the SCP-5875-2 instance asking for their aid was received.
5. As information based entities, SCP-5875-A instances can die if the information comprising their mind is disassociated. More often, however, their information is damaged to the point where they remain conscious but are unable to form coherent thoughts, a state which, though usually treatable, is torturously distressing and greatly feared in SCP-5875-A cultures.
6. The sum total of all ideas that are possible for humans to have.
7. The containment specialist was recruited into the Pataphysics Department as a result.

« SCP-5874 | SCP-5875 | SCP-5876 »


Xi'an Plane Crash

Item #: SCP-5877
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Worldwide birth record databases are to be routinely copied onto Foundation servers to maintain a centralized hub of all persons with a recorded identity.
It is Foundation protocol to assume that any individual is an SCP-5877 instance until one of the following conditions are met:

The individual produces photo identification
The individual is verified to own a web-based account
The individual is confirmed to match an entry in the Foundation Entity Database

Recovered SCP-5877 instances are to be treated as civilians: they are to be amnestized and reintegrated back into society.
Description: SCP-5877 refers to a collection of human-like entities. Identical to regular people in every other way, these entities share the following characteristics:

The origin of SCP-5877 instances, if any, is unknown,
The identity of SCP-5877 instances, if any, is unknown,
SCP-5877 instances lack any record of their prior existence,
Until 2007, all recovered SCP-5877 instances were deceased.

SCP-5877 instances are susceptible to potential membership of GoI-006 ("Nobody").
The majority of SCP-5877 instances discovered by the Foundation are dead at time of recovery. It is acknowledged that a significant number of these cases are indistinguishable from non-anomalous humans that have simply been damaged beyond recognizability; however there have been significant cases of SCP-5877 instances that have lead the Foundation to label the overall phenomenon as anomalous. Some such cases are listed below:

Date
Event
Normalcy Breach

05/16/1970
Fire burned down 14 homes on Maple Street, Redland, California.
Evacuation of these homes was recorded as successful, with only 2 individuals unaccounted for. However, disaster response teams inspecting the remains of the homes found over 60 bodies between the houses. Bodies were found largely in bedrooms, or nearby burnt mattresses and blankets.

11/14/1984
Twin stillborn children delivered in Dublin hospital.
Previous sonogram of the mother only showed one child.

08/22/1996
Flight 40014 from Xi'an to Shanghai crashed, killing all passengers.
The bodies of 30 additional victims were found around the crash that could not be identified, while all people listed on the flight itinerary were accounted for. These SCP-5877 instances were found strapped into seats on top of identified passengers.

Recoveries of Live SCP-5877 Instances: Initially, SCP-5877 was catalogued as a phenomenon associated only with dead bodies. In 2007, live instances of SCP-5877 were discovered, often in groups. The Foundation has located living SCP-5877 instances three times since then.

Date: 05/14/2009
# of Instances: 54
Recovery: Foundation resources heard numerous rumors about a mining operation salvaging weaponizable anomalous materials from a quarry in Texas. While initial investigation did not find significant information to support the rumors, the concerns of a para-terrorism threat spurred a raid of the quarry.
The raid did not find any anomalous materials. However, the mining operation was illegal, as it was unsanctioned and made use of slave labor, who were forced to sleep in the quarry. Questioning and processing of the labor force found that they were all SCP-5877 instances.
Of note, Agent Tyler Maliz reported that, following the raid, he had encountered a young girl who appeared to have been watching the event from outside the quarry, taking notes in a bright pink journal. When questioned by Maliz, she acted similarly to an SCP-5877 instance, and was escorted to a transport and supposedly brought to a Foundation Site. However, she was unaccounted for in the final containment report. Due to her elusiveness and observant nature1, it was theorized that the girl may hold connections to the GoI-006 ("Nobody"). Additionally, due to the lack of individual records pertaining to the girl, she was labeled as an SCP-5877 instance.
Following the processing of these SCP-5877 instances, MTF Theta-15 ("Name Taggers") was established to deal with identity-related anomalies, and interactions with Nobody. Personnel from the quarry raid were inducted as the first selection of Theta-15 members.

Date: 07/22/2013
# of Instances: 74
Recovery: While tailing Nobody2 during a heavy rainstorm in Louisiana, MTF Theta-15 encountered a homeless shelter which had reached its maximum capacity. Numerous individuals both inside the shelter and requesting entry outside the shelter could neither identify themselves, nor matched Foundation records.
Theta-15 requested Foundation transportation to arrive under the cover story of public transportation sent to relocate some of the homeless to a new shelter. Due to the rushed nature of the operation, it is believed that a small number of SCP-5877 instances were not properly recovered. However, due to their status, this was believed to have no significant impact on maintaining the Veil.

Date: 12/12/2018
# of Instances: 37
Recovery: Foundation personnel received numerous tips about couples adopting children who had no given names from a single orphanage in Romania. The adoption process was described by participants as "simple" and "casual".3
Agent Maliz led MTF Theta-15 in a search of the orphanage under the guise of investigating possible human trafficking. The search met no resistance. All recovered SCP-5877 instances were under the age of 16. No adult SCP-5877 instance or baseline humans were encountered.
Recovered SCP-5877 instances described the owner of the orphanage as a young woman who the younger instances called "Big Sis" and "Miss", and the older instances simply referred to with pronouns. Foundation personnel currently believe this is the same member of Nobody that was linked to the previous recoveries.

Following each recovery of SCP-5877 instances, they were each amnestized, supplied with a name and personal history, and recorded in both internal Foundation databases, as well as relevant governmental systems.
Nobody Capture: On 07/18/2023, Nobody was contained after robbing a Cold Stone Creamery in Longmont, Colorado. MTF Theta-15 tracked Nobody to a nearby hotel, where she was detained with no resistance. Following the Nobody GOI Project Coordinator, the International Affairs Specialist, and the SCP-5353 Project Lead, MTF Theta-15 captain Tyler Maliz was permitted to interview Nobody regarding SCP-5877.
get to the analogy faster, too much puttering around before hand

Nobody: It's been a long time since I've felt so popular.
Maliz: Why did you let us catch you?
Nobody: Oh come on. Even the egg head entertained some small talk.
Maliz: We've spent decades chasing you, and this is the first time we've caught you. And it was because of a sloppy smash and grab where all you took was a goddamn ice cream cake. You're here for a reason.
Nobody: Ooh, so that's where I've seen your face before!
Maliz: So you recognize me.
Nobody: Only vaguely. I'm good with faces, not so much names though so I could still use an introduction. It's much harder to have a chat with someone if you don't even know their name.
Maliz sighs.
Maliz: Fine. I'm Tyler Maliz.
Nobody: I'm sensing some pent up resentment. Are you annoyed that I've been evading you this long?
Maliz: You bit my mother fifty years ago.
Nobody appears taken aback.
Nobody: So… first of all I don't remember that, but secondly I feel like judging me by any actions I may or may not have taken fifty years ago is not a very charitable interpretation of who I am today.
Maliz: You make a bad first impression.
Nobody: So that probably was me but not like me sitting here me.
Maliz: Now you're changing the topic. Why are you here?
Nobody: You don't just expect me to tell you everything. Where's the fun in that?
Maliz: Okay, fine. Where are your people then?
Nobody: Oh? My people?
Maliz: Every time we've seen you, there's always been people like you around. People without names, identities, anything beyond their bodies really. Like you.
Nobody: I'll be honest, I didn't expect the rude field agent to ask the most interesting questions of me today.
Maliz: You're deflecting.
Nobody: Alright, alright. I know it would be easiest for me to tell you, but I can't.
Maliz: Do you have a reason why?
Nobody: It's against the rules.
Maliz: Do you have a reason that's not bullshit?
Nobody: You ever wonder why I only ever lead you to things but never tell you? Or why you never see me really doing anything? But you and I both know that I get things done. I'm like a universal handyman. Or handywoman, this time.
Maliz: I don't see how that's a reason.
Nobody: The best janitor is the one who keeps an office clean but is never seen around a mess. And no one in their right mind keeps a close eye on a plumber when he's fixing your pipes. If you see me doing my job, then I'm not really doing all that good a job then. And if I tell you how I change the roof tiles, then you'll think you can do it yourselves, only to fall off your house and break your neck. Those are the rules of being a handyman.
Maliz: This is the best I'm getting out of you today, isn't it?
Nobody: It's a much clearer answer than I gave to anyone else today. You could show at least a little gratitude.
Maliz: I'll be taking my leave.

Recovered Items: At the time of recovery, Nobody was carrying the following items:

A .45 caliber glock 30. Serial number has been filed off.
A Swiss army knife. The long blade, shortblade, can opener and wire stripper all are worn from heavy use. The screw driver tool has been sharpened to a point, and is stained with blood.
A leather jacket. Does not appear to have been washed within the past 90 days.
An IHOP rewards card.
A pocket journal. Most of the pages have been torn out. Scans of the remaining entries are presented below:

Cataclysm #TG-442, 7/14
Arrived at cataclysm location. Town hasn't changed much.
Cause of cataclysm: Pending Rule 1 Violation
Due to size and congregation of Flock #551, violation of Rule 1 is imminent. Size also prohibits natural reintegration. Intervention appears to be required.
Current tailing entities: SCP, White Suit

Cataclysm #TG-442, 7/15
Current messenger is running threadbare, need to find replacement, and preferably a suitable depot.
Located flock spread out in nearby park. Locals have taken notice, however currently believe them to be a summer camp of sorts. Worried about night owls asking questions.
No disruption events of note. Yet.
Tailing entities: SCP, White Suit, Mrs. Englewood (surprised she still lives there)

Cataclysm #TG-442, 7/16
Messenger is beginning to dissociate. Worried about recurrence of Rule 1 violation.
Leukocytes converging on Flock #551. Car accident on Highway 33 most likely a disruption event. Barely anyone drives on that road, hard to believe two of them got into a head-on-head.
Need to temporarily hide flock without breaking Rule 4.
Tailing entities: SCP, White Suit, Mrs. Englewood

Cataclysm #TG-442, 7/17
No sign of White Suit in two days. I definitely didn't lose him. Suspect interference attempt soon.
Direct interaction with Mrs. Englewood successful. Rule 4 overcome.
Englewood agreed to store Flock #551 in her barn. Used public transit in combination with Mrs. Englewood's truck to transport the flock. Surprised the buses are allowed, but then again those drivers have probably seen stranger things.
Worried about disruption event escalation.
Currently scouting large-scale reintegration options. May have to go with the failsafe.
Tailing entities: SCP, White Suit, Mrs. Englewood

Cataclysm #TG-442, 7/18
Sufficient information collected.
Predicted cataclysm date: 5/21 5/22
Current obstacles: White Suit interference, messenger stamina, Rule 4, ensuring no recursion of Rule 1 violation
Resources: Notebook, swiss army knife, .22 caliber (3 bullets), connections
Lack of notable disruption events has me worried, but also gives me an idea.

PoI-006 ("Nobody") Materials Report
After going through the notes left in Nobody's journal, we've been able to locate the residence of one "Mirian Englewood". We also found reports of a large number of homeless individuals traveling from Longmont to a stop three miles from Mrs. Englewood's abode a few days ago. If history is anything to go by, the flock is a group of SCP-5877 Instances.
The problem is, we know that Nobody has a history of tricks and deceit. This wouldn't be the first time they've yanked us around. We're skeptical that they would leave these notes behind for us to find. These feel like something planted. But if they are something planted, why would she call attention to her notebook as a resource? That's bound to make anyone suspicious of its contents.
It is due to these concerns that additional interview with Nobody was held in an effort to gain any additional information. A transcript is presented below:

Nobody: Hello! You know, I was a little worried I wasn't going to get to have another chat with you.

Maliz: Your notes mentioned a "cataclysm". What is that?
Nobody: Getting right to it then, are we?
Maliz: Just answer the question.
Nobody: Well, I imagine it is pretty self-explanatory. A cataclysm is a bad thing.
Maliz: I'll be more specific then. What happens when a cataclysm occurs?
Nobody: No idea.
Maliz: You don't know?
Nobody: My job is to stop them. If I ever knew what happened during a cataclysm that'd mean I'd broken the rules.
Maliz: You're falling back to the rules again.
Nobody: Is there a problem with that?
Maliz: You're justifying your ignorance off of something you refuse to explain. It's a crude tactic.
Nobody: Fine, I'll give you some context. Think of them like physics. We don't really understand parts of it, but it's probably grounded in something.
Maliz: Now you're deflecting! I need you to tell me what this cataclysm is so we can stop it.
Nobody: Oh, you're going to intervene yourself?
Maliz: We can't let you do it.
Nobody: I see. Well, if you want to fix it, you can probably just terminate the entire flock.
Maliz: Excuse me?
Nobody: Well, you need to clean up after yourselves, but yeah. That'd do it.
Maliz: … huh.
Nobody: What did you expect?
Maliz: Not that. That… that was a bold call.
Nobody: Oh? Is it now?
Maliz: Well, you see, in your notes, you mentioned numerous times a "disruption event" clearly tied to the results of the cataclysm, but just now you told me you have no clue what happens. And given how smug you've been about your record, I'm inclined to believe that means you added those lines to your notes when you wrote them down to embellish the impact of the cataclysm. Or maybe the cataclysm doesn't even exist and you just want us to appear at the target's house on the given date.
Nobody: So you're not going?
Maliz: Let me finish. Because now, with me taking your word on the cataclysm, you told me to just… shoot them? If I really was just taking you at face value you'd be condemning those people to death. But you don't think I really believe you yet. And you're banking on that.
Nobody: And you're explaining all this to me because?
Maliz: Because if I wasn't reading between the lines right, you would've interrupted me more. You would've cast more doubt on what I'm saying. But… none of this leads to you escaping. None of this leads to a large trap. At best, you manage to neutralize some anomalies and a small number of our men but that's nothing in the grand scheme of things and you know that.
Nobody: Which means?
Maliz: Our interests may align.
Nobody chuckles.
Nobody: You sound unhappy about this.
Maliz: You've never been the type to help us.
Nobody: Now isn't that a self-centered view of it.
Maliz: Then maybe you can elaborate?
Nobody: Now it's my turn to imagine a hypothetical. Right now, we believe that there's seven billion people in the world right now, correct? What if I told you there were actually eight billion. That one out of every eight people you pass by on the street, see on a subway, or sit near at a restaurant, are unaccounted for. That aren't really supposed to be here. That the number of bodies in the world exceeds the number of names. How would we really know?
Maliz: We don't produce enough resources to sustain an additional billion people.
Nobody: Okay fine. Be pedantic. Let's call it a hundred thousand then. Honestly it would probably never get to a billion anyways. That'd be against the rules.
Maliz: Is there something that actually enforces the rules?
Nobody: Nothing explicit, but I believe that's what the cataclysms are for.
Maliz: Penalties for breaking the rules?
Nobody: I like to think of them as the universe… over compensating for cheating. It can get away with it though because no one really cares when a flock dies. As far as the world is concerned, it's just another body to the count. Did you know that there's no meaningful difference between ten and twenty people dying in a shooting? The count only matters when the victims have names and lives and connections to the rest of the world. Much easier to kill someone without a name.
Maliz: That's what you're up to? Protecting these people from… the rules?
Nobody: Is it that hard to imagine that someone who goes by "Nobody" is the messiah of the nameless? Shepherding my flocks into a new life? I have my rules to obey but at the end of the day all I want is to give them proper names so they can live proper lives. Luckily, names are cheap. The only caveat is they must be given to you. And well… I can't give names for obvious reasons.
Maliz: So you string us along, because we can give them a new identity and reintegrate them into society.
Nobody grins.
Nobody: You have no idea how happy I am you're assigned to me.
Maliz: Yeah, fuck you too.

Incident 5877-I: On 9/21/19, MTF Theta-15 was deployed to recover the proper SCP-5877 instances from the Englewood Residence. Below is a timeline of events:

<19:14> Theta-15 arrives at the Englewood residence. The team splits into two groups: Puma and Cougar.
<19:16> Puma knocks on the entrance to the main house while Cougar approaches the barn, which is approximately 100m away from the house.
<19:17> Mrs. Englewood opens the door. She appears visibly distressed. Puma members are introduced as door-to-door salesmen, and enter the house uninvited.
<19:19> Cougar reaches the barn. Members don infra-red goggles to validate the presence of SCP-5877 instances. 32 distinct heat signatures are present. It is noted that the barn is unusually quiet given the number of individuals inside.
<19:19> Mrs. Englewood insists that Puma must leave, citing that her husband does not like having visitors this late. It is noted that Mrs. Englewood lived alone, having divorced her husband six years prior.
<19:20> Cougar opens the door to the barn. Inside are 31 SCP-5877 instances, as well as a man wearing a white suit (henceforth PoI-5877), who is holding a younger SCP-5877 instance, and pointing a gun at its head.
<19:20> Cougar members demand that PoI-5877 release the SCP-5877 instance, and put down the gun. PoI-5877 responds by demanding the location of Nobody. Cougar refuses to divulge the information.
<19:21> Mrs. Englewood grows desperate to remove Puma from her house, and attacks one member with a pan. Mrs. Englewood is subsequently restrained, and shouts "He'll kill me if you stay here" before being sedated.
<19:21> PoI-5877 begins cursing to himself, while keeping his weapon trained on his hostage. Cougar demands that PoI-5877 surrender again. PoI-5877 backs up toward the rear exit to the barn, using his hostage as a shield. After he leaves through the exit, a single gunshot can be heard. The remaining SCP-5877 instances burst into screams. Cougar runs through the exit to find the SCP-5877 instance now on the ground, neutralized via bullet wound.
<19:22> Puma finishes amnestizing Mrs. Englewood.
<19:23> Cougar signal that it is safe for Foundation transports to collect the SCP-5877 instances.

Following the incident, the 30 SCP-5877 instances were brought to Site-23 and held in standard humanoid containment lockers. Preparations were made to begin amnestization and reintegration on 5/23.
Interview 5877.2: Due to the unexpected presences of PoI-5877, Agent Maliz arranged another interview with Nobody the following day to confront her about the unexpected hostile.

<Begin Log>
Maliz: Who the fuck was that?
Nobody: Well that's not a great way to say hello.
Maliz: That man in the white suit, why was he there?
Nobody: I mean, he was part of the plan.
Maliz: Why didn't you tell me about him?
Nobody: You were doing so well, I would've felt bad if I pointed out any variables you missed.
Maliz: He killed one of your people!
Nobody: Weren't you the one who said a few deaths didn't mean much in the grand scheme of things?
Maliz: For you! You wouldn't care about that.
Nobody: Ah, well you're right there. But if you really want to know, the man was there because he's my ride out of here.
Maliz: No. I don't believe that.
Nobody: Swear on my life.
Maliz: You're messing with me.
Nobody: I am but that doesn't mean I'm lying.
Maliz: Then why are you telling me?
Nobody: Because it's how I start the next turn.
Maliz: No.
Nobody: No… what?
Maliz: You're not going to just up and leave. You'll be lucky to see the light of day. This "game" is ridiculous. You're telling me your plan, so I'm going to put a stop to it.
Nobody: That's sort of the problem though. You can't just stop it. You don't see? It's all part of the plan. Your knowledge of the plan is part of the plan. Every second you spend interviewing me is a second spent delaying something else. Waiting for an email to be delivered to your account. Waiting for one of your lab monkeys to bring by some chemicals. I can't see outside my cell but I can hear footsteps, the creaking of cart wheels, the chatter of security guards. Everything I've done up until this point is measured to a tee.
Maliz: … that's cheating.
Nobody: Come again?
Maliz: That's cheating. You're not allowed to say that. Just claim that everything that's happened is part of a plan I can't ever verify. It's against the rules. It's a coward's move.
Nobody: If it was against the rules, I wouldn't be allowed to say it.
Maliz: Then you're bluffing.
Nobody: I could be. But does that change how certain you are that Site-23 is still outside that door?
Maliz: How do you know that designation?
Nobody: A good plumber knows the house better than its occupants.
Maliz: Back to the handyman shit again?
Nobody: I'm sorry you're getting frustrated.
Maliz: You don't mean that.
Nobody: I like you Tyler. I really do. You remind me of your mother. You keep your eye on as much as you can and you have a good grasp of what you don't know. But today, I need you to doubt. I need you to be my witness, but a careful one.
Containment breach alarms sound.
Maliz: What the— Did you do this?
Nobody: Of course not. I've been here. Talking to you.
Maliz peeks his head out the door and attempts to wave down security guards.
Maliz: I need an SCP escort! I can't leave this one alone!
Nobody: But you know doctor, you could've been at the breach. It might've been you conducting whatever, or observing whatever procedure.
Maliz: Just stop talking! I'm trying to get us out of here.
Nobody: Don't worry about that too much. I was just about to take my leave anyways.
Maliz: Excuse me?
Nobody: Do take care of the girl. She's done well for me.
PoI-5877 from Incident 5877-I enters the interview room brandishing a handgun. Maliz drops to the ground and reaches for his own gun. The SCP-5877 instance sitting across from Maliz screams.
Maliz: Who are you?
PoI-5877: That's not important. Who is that?
PoI-5877 points at the screaming SCP-5877 instance.
Maliz: Who the fuck are you?
PoI-5877: We're on the same team today, I promise. I just need to know, if you recognize it.
SCP-5877 Instance: Please, please don't kill me. Please don't shoot me please.
Maliz looks at the SCP-5877 instance, who is now whimpering.
Maliz: Wait… Nobody was here just a moment ago.
PoI-5877: So you don't recognize it?
Maliz: No. I don't.
PoI-5877 lowers his gun.
PoI-5877: Fuck.
There is a pause. Both Maliz and PoI-5877 can be heard taking deep breaths over the sound of containment breach sirens. The SCP-5877 instance stops speaking, but can be heard sniffling.
Maliz: [to PoI-5877] Are you supposed to be the cataclysm?
PoI-5877: Pardon?
Maliz: Nobody, when they were here they… they said something about a cataclysm. About reinforcing the rules of the universe. I'm wondering if they're referring to you.
PoI-5877: Son, in the century that I have been hunting that monster, not once have I heard it use the word "cataclysm".
Maliz: … goddamn it.
PoI-5877 leaves the interview room, closing the door behind him. Maliz slowly stands, and sits back in his chair. He attempts to slow his heart rate as the containment alarms continue to sound.
SCP-5877 Instance: Are you ok?
Maliz: I've been played for a fool. But, otherwise I'm fine. Are you hurt?
SCP-5877 Instance: No… but I could use some help.
Maliz: Help you with what?
SCP-5877 Instance: I— I don't know. I was just told that I wouldn't be left on my own, because there'd be someone around to help me. And the other man left, so it must've meant you.
Maliz: I see. I guess, yeah. I'm going to help you.
SCP-5877 Instance: … thank you.
Maliz: I haven't done anything yet.
SCP-5877 Instance: Yeah but… nobody has even offered before.
<End Log>

The containment breach was determined to be caused by critical failure of energy containment measures while performing testing on SCP-████. The exact source of these failures is unknown, as available documentation suggests that the measures passed preliminary testing earlier that day. The resulting explosion resulted in 40 casualties, consisting of 3 Foundation staff, 7 D-Class, and all 30 recovered SCP-5877 instances.
PoI-5877 was later identified to be SCP-5353, who must have entered Site-23 during the breach resulting from the explosion. His oral reports indicate that he rescued several Foundation personnel trapped under debris before exiting the facility.
Following this event, an official survey of survivors found that fewer members of the janitorial staff were accounted for than indicated by the custodian budget. However, no records could be found to indicate that any individual janitor was unaccounted for.

The Man Who Wasn't There

The Man In The White Suit

Hub
Hello, My Name Isn't
Chiaroscuro
Nobody, Nobody, Nobody, and Nobody's Encounters with The Man in the White Suit
SCP-5353 -- Does Anyone Remember Fritz Obermeyer?
Everyday Is Somebody's Birthday
→ SCP-5877 -- Nobodies ←
Ghosts in the Machine
Files intercepted from Anderson Systems personnel
SCP-5375 -- Nobody and the Name Machine
Epilogue:
Nobody in Their Right Mind

Footnotes
1. Specifically the act of diligent note taking
2. Identified as being the same girl found during the previous SCP-5877 recovery
3. Ethics Committee advised that adopted children from the orphanage be tracked and recovered due to concerns of the responsibility of parents adopting from such an institution.

« SCP-5876 | SCP-5877 | SCP-5878 »