Item #: SCP-6309
Object Class: Safe Neutralized (See Addendum-6309-B)
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-6309 is to be contained within a standard safe storage locker at Site-19. All Foundation personnel with level two clearance or higher are permitted testing of SCP-6309 at the discretion of the site director.
Description: SCP-6309 is Junior Researcher Mary Name's resignation letter. SCP-6309's anomalous abilities manifest when it is damaged in any capacity, after which it will anomalously repair itself to its original state after a period of ten minutes.
Discovery Log: SCP-6309 anomalous capabilities were discovered after being placed in a paper shredder by Dr. Name. One hour after its presumed destruction, Dr. Name returned to empty the contents of the paper shredder and discovered SCP-6309 intact.
Addendum:

+ Addendum-6309-A

- Addendum-6309-A

Formal Resignation Notice

get out of my head
get out of my head
When I say my head, I mean mine. Not Dr. Name's, not stop1010's, not anyone else's, mine.
For the past year, four months, and twelve days, there has not been one where I haven't thought about you. I hate it. I don't hate you, I just hate how you're everywhere I go.
Every time, without fail, anytime I read or watch a piece of fiction, the first thought I think is “Wow, that would be a good SCP!”
Every. Time.
More than that, even when doing mundane tasks I can't stop thinking about you. I'll be looking at a door knob and think, “What if that knob became the dot in PONG, bouncing off the sides of the door frame? That would be an interesting article!”
Sometimes, I'll have dreams, not of an SCP or anything, but of me writing an SCP or thinking of a concept for an SCP.
I do not like doing any of the things listed here.
I'm sure you're wondering now, “Hey, if you don't like it, why don't you take a br-”
I already did that. Nothing has changed.
I do not enjoy writing 99% of the time anymore. It is painful. It hurts to write.
Every time I'm not writing about you, I want to be. Every time I'm writing about you, I don't want to.
I do not know why I still think about you. I don't want to. I want to move on with my life. It is painful to think about you. Yet I still think about you anyways.

This is such a stupid fucking idea. I come up with some dumb little phrase and waste a day writing an article. Actually, I wouldn't even call it “writing.” I wrote three paragraphs and spent the rest of the day thinking about writing this article.
The procrastination didn't stop yesterday either. I spent the entire day listening to music and pretending the lyrics were about this article I haven't written yet. You were in my head the whole day.
It's the middle of the night now and I'm finally getting this over with.
Item # SCP-6309
Object class: I don't know. That's the point. I'm trying to find out what this is.
Let's just go with “Uncontained” for now.
Special Containment Procedures: I have no idea.
Description: SCP-6309 is a memetic phenomenon that has only affected me. I will now only refer to myself as SCP-6309-1.1
SCP-6309 takes the form of persistent intrusive thoughts of the SCP wiki, even when none are desired. Experiences of SCP-6309 exponentially increase over a period of approximately 1.5 years.
I have reported spending, at minimum, seven hours per day experiencing SCP-6309.

I've been thinking about this a lot, and I think writing this is a bad idea. I've been spending way too much time thinking about how to make this into an interesting article that people like.
Then I asked myself,
“Do I want this to be a good article, or do I want you to take this seriously?”
It may be disappointing for both of us, but I think I know how to contain this thing now.
Maybe a bit of disappointment is what I need right now.
You know what you need to do.

+ Addendum-6309-B

- Addendum-6309-B 

On 2/13/2022 at approximately 5:31 AM, SCP-XXXX and Dr. Name spontaneously dematerialized.
The following note was found at Dr. Name's desk:

thank you

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Item #: SCP-6309
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: The following Procedures are to be enacted if Dr. Name attempts to document SCP-6309, or displays signs of being willing to document SCP-6309 at a later date:
• Dr. Name is to consume media containing content that can be vaguely utilized to describe SCP-6309. Dr. Name is to visualize documenting SCP-XXXX for as long as feasibly attainable before actual documentation of SCP-6309 begins.
• Following the start of documentation of SCP-6309, Dr. Name is to be offered edited versions of SCP-6309's documentation. Edited drafts of SCP-6309's documentation are to possess clinical tone, simplified explanations of SCP-6309, and an absence of spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors.
• Following rejection of these edits, Dr. Name is to extend SCP-6309's document's length by several paragraphs, through the addition of several addendums and footnotes.
• Following the removal of these paragraphs, Dr. Name is to display apprehensiveness when attempting to finalize SCP-6309's documentation.
• Following the failure of all previous Containment Procedures, all paper products in Dr. Name's office are to be replaced with instances of Anomalous Item AI-729142
This iteration of SCP-6309's documentation is being created in accordance with the Special Containment Procedures, as to delay the publication of SCP-6309's article and to increase the article's length.
Description: SCP-6309's description will be found in Addendum-6309-A.
You are to not comply with the instructions that will be given in Addendum-6309-A.

Footnotes
1. Well, that's just plain unnecessary. Not only is it confusing, it distracts from the point. SCP-6309 affects me. Calling myself anything else will make containing this thing actively harder.
2. A sheaf of papers that anomalously self-repair when damaged.

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