LiterallyMechanical

The Dark, by LiterallyMechanical
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A few of my favorites:

SCP-5236 — Ethics Committee Inquest
SCP-3163 — The Almanack
SCP-4357 — Slimelord

A composite image of SCP-4170, circled in yellow, against background stars. Higgs Field density is depicted in green, νσ emissions are depicted in red, and visible light is depicted in grayscale.

Item #: SCP-4170
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Pending repairs to the Colorado High-Accuracy Neutrino Telescope (CHANT), the orbital position, Higgs Field density, and approximate νσ flux of SCP-4170 is to be monitored by the Large Dark Matter Array. At such time as the CHANT is returned to full functionality, translations of all νσ communications by SCP-4170 are to be recorded in both the SCP database and the Dark Body database, where SCP-4170 maintains a dual-entry as 2014DBI Miriam.
Upon completion of repairs, the CHANT is not to be used for monitoring of SCP-4170 until sufficient shielding has been installed to protect the telescope from direct attack by focused neutrino streams. As this shielding technology currently does not exist, the Foundation is to increase funding and resource allocation to the Dark Matter Astronomy department by at least 25%. These funds are to be earmarked for fast-track research and development of defenses against neutrino weaponry.
Description: SCP-4170 is a dark-body intelligence (DBI) in circumsolar orbit with a period of 34.7 years and a semi-major axis of 10.64 AU, slightly beyond the orbit of Saturn. Calculations of mass decay rate imply that SCP-4170 is a relatively newly-formed body, having coalesced between 20 and 25 thousand years ago. In all physical respects, SCP-4170 is unremarkable among the population of known non-anomalous DBIs, with a core Higgs density of approximately 350 GeV and a Hess radius of 12 kilometers. Psychological reports indicate a moderate degree of asocial behavior and emotional volatility.
Dark matter is typically invisible and undetectable to ordinary baryonic matter (e.g. optical, x-ray, or radio telescopes) save through density measurements of the Higgs Field and detection of sterile neutrino (νσ) emissions. As these dark matter astronomy techniques are not presently accessible to researchers outside the Foundation, the existence of DBIs is unknown to the general public. Conversely, though DBIs are sensitive to the powerful gravitational pull of the sun and nearby planets, there is no known mechanism by which DBIs could be cognizant of the existence of humanity. Though the Foundation has collected ample communications data from thousands of DBIs, there is no evidence that DBIs other than SCP-4170 are aware of any of the other sapient species that currently inhabit the Solar System, including Homo sapiens.
SCP-4170 was first detected in a 2014 sky survey by the Foundation's Large Dark Matter Array, and was at that time designated 2014 DBI62 by the Dark Matter Astronomy department. Detailed observation of its νσ communications with other DBIs confirmed that it was at least a class-III (pseudosapient) or class-IV (sapient) intelligence, prompting assignment of the randomly-generated common designation "2014DBI Miriam." Classification and renaming were delayed due to the perfunctory and terse nature of its social interactions with nearby class-III and class-IV DBIs, rendering sufficient data collection unusually challenging. Indirect evidence was collected from other DBIs to supplement the sparse dataset, an example of which is reproduced below:

► DBI Communication Log 2014.83 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2014.83 [excerpt]

Note: For ease of reading, dialogue from SCP-4170 has been highlighted in red.
2016DBI Theodore: [Informal Greeting]. [Query: Self-assessment of your emotional status]?
2011DBI Ashley: [Informal Greeting]. [Response: Positive emotional status]. [Query: Self-assessment of your emotional status]?
2016DBI Theodore: [Response: Neutral emotional status].
2011DBI Ashley: [Query: Request for elaboration]?
2016DBI Theodore: [Response: Decline to respond].
2011DBI Ashley: [Strong query: Request for elaboration]?
2016DBI Theodore: [Response: No causal relationship between recent events and current emotional state].
2011DBI Ashley: [Expression of disbelief].
2016DBI Theodore: [No causal relationship between recent events and current emotional state]. Translator's note: Abrupt frequency downshift in 2016DBI Theodore's communication indicates a deliberate effort to convey a negative emotional status, contradicting its earlier response. In previous conversations, 2016DBI Theodore has employed this technique to deliberately elicit feelings of concern and sympathy from 2011DBI Ashley, a frequent conversational partner and confidant.
2011DBI Ashley: [Term of endearment]. [Query: You have recently communicated with 2014DBI Miriam]?
2016DBI Theodore: [Response: Affirmative].
2011DBI Ashley: [Term of endearment]. [Expression of commiseration].
2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2011DBI Ashley: [Formal Greeting].
2016DBI Theodore: [Formal Greeting]. Translator's note: Significantly delayed response indicates substantial reluctance to communicate
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Self-assessment of your emotional status]?
2016DBI Theodore: [Response: Fine].
2011DBI Ashley: [Response: Fine].
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I am experiencing a negative emotional status].
2011DBI Ashley: [Noncommittal reply].
2016DBI Theodore: [Noncommittal reply].

With the sole known exception of SCP-4170, DBIs are not considered to be anomalous. While the Foundation's discovery of extraterrestrial dark intelligence within our solar system was of great interest to researchers, current theories developed by the Foundation fully account for the evolution of sapient beings composed of dark matter. The primordial development, pseudo-neurology, language, and culture of DBIs are well-attested, and their existence is entirely compatible with our present-day understanding of the laws of nature. To date, SCP-4170 is the only DBI to be afforded an entry in the SCP database.
Potential evidence of the anomalous nature of SCP-4170 first came to light in a conversation between SCP-4170 (2014DBI Miriam) and 2016DBI Theodore.

► DBI Communication Log 2015.12 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2015.12 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting]
2016DBI Theodore: [Formal Greeting]
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I have a new friend]
2016DBI Theodore: [Noncommittal reply]
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: My new friend is a planet]
2016DBI Theodore: [Noncommittal reply]
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: My new friend is Planet Three] Translator's note: Earth.
2016DBI Theodore: [Noncommittal reply]
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: You cannot be friends with Planet Three]
2016DBI Theodore: [Noncommittal reply]
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: Planet Three only talks to me]
2016DBI Theodore: [Noncommittal reply]

Following this record, the Colorado High Accuracy Neutrino Telescope was tasked with 24-hour monitoring of 2014DBI Miriam in an effort to determine whether the DBI was in communication with a human or humans. The following excerpts are a small selection of what appear to be one-sided conversations between SCP-4170 and a party on or near Earth1. As no νσ emissions have been detected emanating from Earth, the ability of SCP-4170 to communicate by some unknown means outside of the νσ spectrum has been deemed anomalous.

► DBI Communication Log 2015.23 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2015.23 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Who are you]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Response: I do not understand]. [Repeat Query: Who are you]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Clarify — are you Planet Three?].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of amazement/surprise]. [Query: Clarify — are there many of you in Planet Three]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Are you all friends in Planet Three]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of amazement/surprise]. [Assertion: I am your friend].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of positive emotional status].

► DBI Communication Log 2015.29 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2015.29 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Self assessment of your emotional status]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Why are you experiencing a negative emotional status]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I do not understand]. [Query: What is <untranslatable phrase>]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I do not have <untranslatable phrase>]. [Assertion: I created myself].
2014DBI Miriam: [Response: No, I am not lonely].
2014DBI Miriam: [Response: Expression of thankfulness].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of positive emotional status].
Translator's note: Judging from context, the repeated untranslatable phrase is speculated to be "parent(s)." Further logs will reflect this translation, should additional evidence arise.

► DBI Communication Log 2016.11 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2016.11 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I am near Planet Six]. Translator's note: Saturn. [Query: Can you observe Planet Six at this time with your telescope]? Translator's note: I wasn't sure before, but at this point, I'm positive that this phrase means "telescope." I am impressed that this person managed to explain to a DBI what "light" was.
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I wish to experience Planet Six as you do]. [Query: Can you describe Planet Six to me].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of amazement/awe].
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: When I am near Planet Six, I experience density fluctuations in the Higgs Field. The fluctuation pattern is aesthetically pleasing].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of positive emotional status].

► DBI Communication Log 2017.87 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2017.87 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Your hemisphere of Planet Three is nearing its maximum axial tilt towards the Sun. In past years, this indicated that your group educational program would cease for roughly one-quarter of a Planet Three-year. Is this once again the case]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Does this mean that you will be be active at night with your telescope again]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of positive emotional status].

► DBI Communication Log 2018.23 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2018.23 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2014DBI Miriam: [Query: Are you still experiencing a negative emotional status]?
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of commiseration]. [Assertion: I wish your parents were better friends].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of thankfulness]. [Assertion: I was untruthful when we first met. I told you I was not lonely, and that was a lie]. [Assertion: I had never had a friend until I met you]. [Assertion: Even though your parents are unkind, they somehow managed to create the kindest person in the Solar System].
2014DBI Miriam: [Expression of positive emotional status].

► DBI Communication Log 2020.36 [excerpt]

▼ DBI Communication Log 2020.36 [excerpt]

2014DBI Miriam: [Informal Greeting].
2014DBI Miriam: [Assertion: I think I am seeing something different on Planet Three. A very small dot. I will proceed to examine it closer].

The previous communications log is the last recorded transmission collected by the Colorado High Accuracy Neutrino Telescope. Twelve seconds after receiving this message, a tightly-focused νσ beam struck the main collector plate, overwhelming the detection system and permanently disabling the telescope. As the CHANT was the only device of its kind ever constructed, and as said construction came at considerable expense to the Foundation, all DBI communications collection has been halted indefinitely. Repairs are scheduled to take place within the next five to ten years.

Footnotes
1. The lag between transmissions has been uniformly consistent with a speed-of-light delay between the then-current locations of SCP-4170 and Earth.

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