SCP-4634-022 affixed to a toilet at Locomotive Site-180.

Item №: SCP-4634
Anomaly Class: Safe Archon
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-4634-1 through -128 are stored in the Site-90 anomalous materials archive, alongside information regarding Incident 4634-002. SCP-4634-129 through -256 are currently kept under surveillance at their respective locations of recovery — where possible, the locations have been sealed with containment-grade bulkheads and given a permanent guard detail. Under no circumstances are any documents, SCP-4634 or otherwise, to be removed from these locations.
Description: SCP-4634 are 256 "out of order" signs. All instances are composed of paper and have content varying depending on their location; when affixed to the door to any given room, an SCP-4634 instance will modify itself spontaneously to replicate an existing sign of similar function. If no such preexisting signage exists, the instance will attempt to conform to geographical, cultural, and conceptual norms for its environment — its method of determining this, and the nature of the potential intelligence involved, are unknown. An instance will maintain a given form until applied to another applicable entrance.
Any room1 whose entrance is affixed with an instance of SCP-4634 will cease all ability to function as intended. This effect varies wildly, and (as with the definition of 'room') operates on a form of semi-intuitive internal logic. Application of multiple SCP-4634 instances has no effect on the outcome. Changes induced by SCP-4634 will revert immediately following the sign's removal from the doorway. Attaching SCP-4634 to a freestanding doorway, or to the inside of a door leading outside, has no effect See Addendum.2.
Addendum.1 | Abridged testing log:

Room: Culinary department test kitchen № 7.
Effect: All mechanical components of appliances fused in place, rendering them inert. Cutlery warped and curled beyond recognition, and all solid work-surfaces and cutting boards adopted a soft, malleable, and slightly adhesive texture. D-000014 was introduced to the environment after one hour alongside a large quantity of fresh produce, and was asked to prepare a meal — they were unable to do so due to the rapid decay of all edible substances.

Room: Residential suite S90-R105.
Effect: Legs of bed detached, and springs in the mattress extended to penetrate the fabric lining. Dresser and wardrobe both collapsed, with individual components deforming in such a way as to prevent reassembly. Light fixtures increased brightness by three orders of magnitude and were not able to be deactivated. D-000014 was given a blindfold and protective coverings and ordered to sleep on the room's floor; once they entered, the sprinkler systems activated, dispensing large volumes of molten copper.

Room: Heavy containment cell S90-A03.
Effect: The contents of the room were instantaneously displaced 64 metres north. All objects introduced to the room were displaced in a similar fashion.

Room: Heavy containment cell S90-A03.
Effect: Further tests were conducted, and the containment cell was identified as a potential method of instantaneous transportation. The first test relevant to this goal was conducted with D-000014: upon entering, D-000014 was displaced 64 metres north as expected; their skin and nervous system, however, were displaced 64 metres south. Testing was concluded and the SCP-4634 instance removed.

Room: Specially constructed room, no intended purpose.
Effect: Tests not able to be performed. Notes limited to 128 characters.

SCP-4634-009 as it was at its time of recovery.

Addendum.2 | Discovery/Incident-4634-002:
All SCP-4634 instances recovered to-date were initially located within 128 large stone monuments spaced randomly across the Earth's surface. Each monument possessed a door leading to an internal chamber containing a stone dais of unclear function, and on the inside of each of these doors was an identical SCP-4634 instance in an unknown language. As the removal of instances produced no initial effect, they were recovered without incident.
On 1994-06-12, 03:44 local time, SCP-4634-128 was retrieved from its monument in the oceanic Puysegur trench, and detached from the internal door. Widespread anomalous effects were observed over the following hours, including:

[03:46] All astronomical bodies adopting circular orbits with perpendicular axes of rotation.
[03:47] The asteroid belt fusing into a single ring of uniform density.
[03:59] The alignment of stars to a regular grid pattern within the galaxy.
[05:00] The arrangement of silicon compounds into hexagonal fractal patterns several kilometres across.
[05:59] The arrangement of carbon compounds into square fractal patterns several hundred kilometres across.
[08:40] The coalescence of noble gases into low-temperature crystalline structures.
[10:16] The destruction of all self-replicating compounds and the subsequent death of all life.

The resultant O0-Class Ontological Shift Scenario continued for an indeterminate amount of time, following which a further 128 instances of SCP-4634 manifested in an additional set of 128 monuments, and all changes reverted. No evidence of the incident was located within baseline reality — data presented here is extrapolated from exclusionary monitoring sites and DEEPWELL facilities.
Also present in each new monument was another non-anomalous document in the same language as the original SCP-4634 instance, seemingly written more hastily than its anomalous counterparts. As with the original SCP-4634 instances, it has yet to be translated. The protocol of recovering SCP-4634 was discontinued shortly thereafter, and no plans to reinstate it are currently in place. It is considered in the Foundation's best interests to ensure that the universe as a whole remains non-functional.

Footnotes
1. i.e. a relatively sealed three-dimensional space, as subjectively determined by human perception.

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