Item #: SCP-3067
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: Active containment of SCP-3067, which involved an information-suppression scheme and a satellite-based electromagnetic intercepting system, has been postponed. Should SCP-3067 return, these systems are to be reimplemented immediately. Excluding that of Week 5, audio tracks from SCP-3067 are stored physically in Room 12 at Site-40. Access is denied to Level 1 personnel and below.
Description: SCP-3067 is an ovoid extraterrestrial object, 16m in length, that orbited Earth for 5 weeks. SCP-3067 materialised on ██/██/20██, and directed a series of Very High Frequency (VHF) electromagnetic waves towards Earth until its disappearance on ██/██/20██. These were transmitted once per week, and could be detected by all FM receivers enclosed in SCP-3067's radio horizon. Transmissions sourced by SCP-3067 covered all known carrier frequencies and 'overrode' others by unknown means, making its content receivable across all tunings, and the only content available, unless intercepted by Foundation satellites. Objects entering a field of 2m around SCP-3067 were destroyed by an unknown force, which negated Foundation efforts to contain it on Earth. Attempts to establish remote communications with SCP-3067 were unsuccessful, as no response was received.
5 audio tracks from SCP-3067 were received, some of which exhibited anomalous effects. SCP-3067 had been thought not to bear any relation to humanity until Week 2, in which an audibly recognisable version of Adele's 2008 song 'Make You Feel My Love', albeit subject to major alterations, was transmitted. This prompted a thorough investigation into the origin of SCP-3067, which was unsuccessful.
Per transmission, FM receivers with a visual interface were able to display a short message from SCP-3067 in English. The message was invariable, and is as follows:

DIMENSION / REALM GRACED BY TELEPORTING SONIC SPECTACLE PRESENCE! STRICTLY SPEAKING BETWEEN-REALMM LEGISLATION DEEMED ILLEGAL KEEPING MOVING WANT NO BETWEEN-REALM ENFORCERS ON MY TAIL GOODBYE SOON SORRY. H OPE TO IMPROVE EARTH MUSIC PREFERENCE SINCE AT THE MOMENT A BIT CRAP BUT ITS OK

This message was followed by individualised lines of text and/or symbols, relative to the transmission received in that week. Details of individual transmissions are listed below.

Week 1

 Week 1

Date: ██/██/20██
Received Text: "EJ - EJ"
Description of Audio Content: 9 minutes 55 seconds. A recording of a gravelly, unintelligible voice speaking an unknown language. Repeated listens verified the presence of rhythm and rhyme within the track. The voice featured in the track demonstrated incredible vocal and linguistic capability - at least 500 different variations on the same rhyme were featured.
Observed Anomalous Effect(s): N/A

Week 2

 Week 2

Date: ██/██/20██
Received Text: "Adele - Make You Feel My Love UFAB55 RE MIX"
Description of Audio Content: 4 minutes 30 seconds. Audio consisted of the vocal acapella track to 'Make You Feel My Love' played against a series of reverberated guttural sounds. When played back, it is difficult to determine whether these sounds are synthesised or organic. It is currently unknown as to how the isolated vocal track from the original Adele song was obtained.
Observed Anomalous Effect(s): N/A

Week 3

 Week 3

Date: ██/██/20██
Received Text: "||||||||||\\-—\\///||_ - ||||||||||||]]]]]]||||[-]"
Description of Audio Content: 66 minutes 42 seconds. A series of tones, each lasting no longer than 6 milliseconds, ranging in Frequency between 1,000 to 20,000 Hz.
Observed Anomalous Effect(s): On first listen, all subjects hearing the track compulsively exclaimed an unknown term, "Gumhanado" (/gʊm-hɑːr-nə-dəʊ/). This effect was even observed in an otherwise mute individual; it is one of the few phrases this subject has ever been known to say. When asked what the term meant, affected individuals responded that it was an expression of endearment towards the track, but when further pressed, could not identify how they came upon this knowledge. The effect appeared to have been singular; repeated listens did not produce the same anomalous effect.

Week 4

 Week 4

Date: ██/██/20██
Received Text: "aeoilasnaticp (Finest Laniakea Orchestra) - SYPHONY HUMAN APPEAL X X X X XX X X X"
Description of Audio Content: 26 minutes 3 seconds. An apparently live recording of a long, complex piece of music in several movements. Consisted mostly of short, muted percussion sounds and long, sustained high-pitched voices singing in unison. These voices sang phrases in several different languages both known and unidentified, including English, Spanish and Mandarin. Of the terrestrial languages sung, phrases translated to "I love you", "Baby I love you", "You'll always be mine", "I'm coming home", and "Never let you go".
Observed Anomalous Effect(s): N/A (It is of note that some subjects reported a feeling of comfort and satisfaction upon hearing this recording, although whether this effect was anomalous remains inconclusive)

Week 5

 Week 5

Date: ██/██/20██
Received Text: "/-//**EWHOOPWHOOP-- (NUMBER HIT SONG EVER)"
Description of Audio Content: 3 minutes 56 seconds. Due to its anomalous effect, this description is limited to what was provided by those exposed to it: a repeated metallic kick and snare pattern at 126 beats per minute.
Observed Anomalous Effect(s): Despite its unremarkable nature, those hearing this audio track had a 100% chance of sharing it with the nearest person unless hindered via amnestic administration or neutralisation. Subjects replayed it to others by whatever means necessary. Methods of sharing included, but were not limited to: making recordings using external devices, 'ripping' techniques, and dissemination via social media on the Internet. The effect even applied to subjects who had only heard very small sections of the track, including the moments of silence between the drum hits. Prior to the enactment of a mass-amnestic administration and information-suppression procedure known as Protocol-[REDACTED], modern day ease of digital file-sharing meant that the memetic effect had spread to approximately ███,███ people globally 2 days after initial broadcast, which included members of the general public. This event is considered to be one of the worst information breaches ever sustained by the Foundation, and, in the final weeks prior to its disappearance, prompted the immediate promotion of SCP-3067 to Keter status.

Addendum: New visual information from the [REDACTED] satellite, which was present in the same approximate location as SCP-3067 at the time of its disappearance, has been confiscated. The disappearance of SCP-3067 was captured in a minute-long video by this satellite.
Details are as follows: at 0:46, SCP-3067 emits a flash of light before disappearing. Several seconds later, at 0:51, an orderly arrangement of 5 light-emitting objects of unknown size, now designated SCP-3067-A, appears spontaneously. These objects are flashing, and move frantically around the area of space that SCP-3067 occupied. At 0:54, the objects comprising SCP-3067-A each emit a divergent beam of light, which appear to 'scan' the surrounding area. Then, at 0:58, SCP-3067-A de-materialises in a similar fashion to SCP-3067. Like SCP-3067, the origin of SCP-3067-A is unknown.

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