Item #: SCP-2045
Object Class: Safe Euclid Keter Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2045 is to be continuously covered with a dummy tractor to maintain the appearance of normality. Any civilians who come into contact with SCP-2045 are to be amnesticized. All debris left by SCP-2045 is to be cleared away by Foundation assets. Methods to contain SCP-2045 are currently being considered.
SCP-2045 is to be contained within a standard humanoid-class containment cell, with a calendar on the wall indicating the days of the week, and an empty two-liter bucket. Every Tuesday, SCP-2045 fills the bucket with blackstrap molasses; when the bucket is filled, one class-3 operative is to enter SCP-2045's containment, approach SCP-2045, and speak the phrase "that's enough molasses, Jeffrey. Thank you." Personnel are then to remove the filled bucket, and replace it with a fresh bucket.
Contingent on SCP-2045's good behavior, and at their own discretion, personnel may then kiss SCP-2045 on its forehead.
Due to the difficulties resulting from SCP-2045's apparent inability to comprehend that it now has an SCP designation rather than a name, personnel are authorized to address SCP-2045 as "Jeffrey".
SCP-2045 is never to be contained at a site that is within 200 kilometers from the present containment location of SCP-3872.
Description: SCP-2045 is a sapient humanoid automaton which can generate blackstrap molasses from a flask-shaped protrusion on its back, and then control the motion of that molasses. It is 92cm tall and made of wood, porcelain, cloth, silver, and iron, and responds to the name "Jeffrey". It is capable of speech, but is of low intelligence.
Every Tuesday,1 SCP-2045 will generate 2 liters of blackstrap molasses from its flask and telekinetically direct the molasses into the bucket.2
SCP-2045 claims to have been made by a woman who it refers to only as "Miss", and who it is unable to describe in useful terms (see interview 2045-5). It claims to have resided in her home (which it is likewise unable to describe usefully) and to have generated molasses for her on a weekly basis, until the day it was unable to find her. In her absence, it continued generating molasses "until it wasn't Tuesday any more", at which point it began to search for her, and to telekinetically carry the molasses with it "because nobody came to get it from me and it's not good to just leave it behind".

Personnel with level-3 clearance or higher may access the previous, obsolete description of SCP-2045

Access granted

SCP-2045 is a mobile coherent mass of blackstrap molasses, currently located in the American Northwest.
SCP-2045 is approximately 300 x 300 x 10 meters in dimension, with fluctuations based on movement and absorbed objects. SCP-2045 weighs about 1,324,160,000 kg,3 indicating that SCP-2045 has absorbed a significant amount of material during its existence.
SCP-2045 flows at an approximate rate of 10 km/yr. When SCP-2045 was first discovered (on 5/6/1907, in the Cascade mountain range), it was believed that its motion was due solely to the effect of gravity, similar to glacier movement. However, as of 9/3/1989, when SCP-2045 completely detached from the Cascades onto the plateau, SCP-2045 continued motion at a rate of ~8 km/yr despite no obvious motive force.
Objects that come into contact with SCP-2045 are trapped and absorbed; this is not believed to be anomalous, but is simply the result of coming in contact with a large mobile mass of molasses. While it is possible to mount recovery operations for personnel trapped in SCP-2045, the resources involved are tremendous, and due to the large amount of physical trauma and rapid asphyxiation that occurs, the likelihood of success is low. Out of the five attempts made to rescue Foundation personnel, only one was successful.
SCP-2045 has a large amount of objects trapped in it, in a manner similar to the action of glaciers. In addition to a large number of boulders, dirt, architectural debris, cadavers of various animal species (including at least 400 humans), and dead trees, SCP-2045 also appears to contain a parachute harness, and several firearms and vehicles. Due to SCP-2045's composition, these appear to be perfectly preserved.
The age of SCP-2045 is unknown: dating of samples has been inconclusive, and SCP-2045 has suffered no apparent deterioration during its time in Foundation observation.
Due to the motion of SCP-2045, a trail of debris is perpetually left behind it, in a pattern similar to glacier debris. In order to avoid suspicion, these debris are to be collected as described in the containment procedures.
SCP-2045 was first discovered by the Foundation in 1907 during a flyover of the Cascades to test then-new aerial surveillance technology. Due to its isolation, SCP-2045 was classified as safe and kept under nominal surveillance. However, after an unknown event altered the course of SCP-2045, resulting in the destruction of the town of [REDACTED], the object's classification was raised to Euclid, and to Keter when it was realized that SCP-2045 did not require gravity to power its movements. Since then, SCP-2045 has been under perpetual Foundation observation, and has traveled a total distance of 980 km.

Excerpt of Interview 2045-5; full transcript available upon request with level-3 security clearance or higher
Dr. Byaruhanga: No, Jeffrey, she hasn't.Dr. Byaruhanga: No, Jeffrey, that's not necessary. I'd like to ask you some questions about Miss, actually.Dr. Byaruhanga: Yes, I'm sure she is. Could you tell me what she looked like?Dr. Byaruhanga: … and?Dr. Byaruhanga: Yes, please. Whatever you can remember.Dr. Byaruhanga: I see. Jeffrey, could you maybe tell me about Miss's face?Dr. Byaruhanga: … what?Dr. Byaruhanga: Yes, Jeffrey, you're being good. Can you tell me about Miss's hair? What color was it?Dr. Byaruhanga: Yes, was it black, or white, or brown, or maybe yellow or orange?Dr. Byaruhanga: No, Jeffrey, you're not being bad.Dr. Byaruhanga: When we're done with the questions. All right?Dr. Byaruhanga: Good. Jeffrey, can you tell me what color Miss was?Dr. Byaruhanga: Her skin.Dr. Byaruhanga: Yes, but I meant… all right, you remember Dr. Lindgren, who was here to talk with you the other day?Dr. Byaruhanga: And you remember what she looks like?Dr. Byaruhanga: Remember how her skin is light pink? And my skin is dark brown, see?Dr. Byaruhanga: Can you tell me if Miss's skin was light pink, or dark brown, or maybe another color?Dr. Byaruhanga: Eyes?
Further interviews with SCP-2045 have been similarly unproductive.
Acquisition log:
The designation SCP-2045 was originally applied to the coherent, mobile, +1.3-megaton mass of molasses which was under Foundation surveillance beginning in 1907. In 1999, the Foundation undertook an operation to destroy >99.9999% of the mass of molasses via a combination of incendiaries, directed-energy weaponry, and [REDACTED] technology, with the goal of reducing it to a form small enough to be properly contained. The entity now known as SCP-2045 was discovered at the mass's center, still generating molasses. An on-site operative spontaneously vocalized a request that the entity stop making molasses; the entity complied, and asked whether it had generated enough molasses. It was subsequently taken into custody.

Footnotes
1. Although SCP-2045 understands that "Tuesday" is a recurring phenomenon, it does not appear to grasp the frequency (i.e., once every seven days) with which Tuesday occurs. In the absence of a calendar or other external reminder, SCP-2045 will decide, apparently at random, that a given day "feels like Tuesday"; this will also occur if personnel repeatedly misinform SCP-2045 as to when Tuesday occurs, in which case it will attribute the misinformation to memory lapse or simple error.
2. In the absence of a bucket, SCP-2045 will continue generating molasses until it decides that it has generated "enough".
3. For reference, the mass of a 300 x 300 x 10 m block of pure blackstrap molasses would be 1,312,560,000 kg.
4. The interview in question took place on Friday.

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