PeppersGhost

SCP-1293 - Squeedle Deedle Dee! by PeppersGhost

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Item #: SCP-1293
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: All known specimens of SCP-1293 are to reside within a standard Containment Habitat at Bio-Site 12. Specimens of SCP-1293-A are to be engaged in Procedure 722-Ephraim once per month to avoid the production of SCP-1293-C. A minimum of fifteen (15) armed security personnel must be present within the habitat at all times to neutralize specimens of SCP-1293-C in the event that one is produced. Completed specimens of SCP-1293-A1 are to be photographed before consumption by SCP-1293-A. Personnel present within the habitat are not to attempt communication or physical interaction with specimens of SCP-1293-B during a Terpsichore Event.
Description: SCP-1293 is a species of humanoid creatures of unknown origin. Each specimen of SCP-1293 is unique in appearance, although all specimens generally resemble costumed human beings. Autopsies performed on deceased specimens have shown that SCP-1293 are completely unclothed, with skin, bone, and muscle tissue mimicking various types of fabric. SCP-1293 possess biological components resembling a human circulatory system, except the system carries and distributes multicolored balls of sugar instead of blood. SCP-1293 have no apparent nervous systems or digestive tracts, and do not require food, drink, or sleep. SCP-1293 possess no visible reproductive organs; however, 54% of SCP-1293 specimens are capable of reproduction. For the purpose of this document, such specimens will be considered female and referred to as SCP-1293-A, whereas male (non-reproducing) specimens will be referred to as SCP-1293-B.
SCP-1293-A vocally communicate in American English, speaking with masculine voices in a cheerful manner. Capable of reproduction, SCP-1293-A gestate their young for a period of roughly nine (9) months before giving birth to another specimen of SCP-1293. Newborn SCP-1293 emerge from their mothers fully matured in size and intelligence. SCP-1293-A deliver their young via their mouths,1 which anomalously elongate to accommodate the child's size. Because newborn SCP-1293 are roughly the same size as their progenitors, it is presumed that gestation takes place inside an extradimensional space within SCP-1293-A. If SCP-1293-A are not impregnated2 via Procedure 722-Ephraim, they will produce SCP-1293-C once per month until Procedure 722-Ephraim is executed.
SCP-1293-B are generally lethargic in nature and highly reclusive, avoiding contact with human beings and other specimens of SCP-1293. Unlike SCP-1293-A, SCP-1293-B have shown no capacity for speech. Every forty-five (45) days, SCP-1293-B will congregate and a Terpsichore Event will take place (see Addendum SCP-1293-1). Due to the precisely coordinated nature of Terpsichore Events, it is assumed that SCP-1293-B are capable of communicating telepathically.
SCP-1293-C are malevolent entities produced by SCP-1293-A if not impregnated via Procedure 722-Ephraim. SCP-1293-C differ from other specimens of SCP-1293 in that they generally possess large teeth, multiple arms, prehensile tongues, and elongated talons. SCP-1293-C are openly hostile toward human beings and will attempt to mutilate any individual they encounter.
Procedure 722-Ephraim is the process by which SCP-1293-A are impregnated. To begin the procedure, a child, aged 4 to 12 years old and belonging to an on-site personnel member, is to be introduced to the specimen of SCP-1293-A that is in heat. If SCP-1293-A decides that the child is suitable, it will regurgitate a sheet of paper (SCP-1293-A1) and a metal tin of Crayola-brand crayons (SCP-1293-A2). Using his or her imagination, the child must then draw a picture of a humanoid creature. If an adult human attempts to influence the child's drawing process, whether it be during the procedure or beforehand, SCP-1293-A will announce that the child is unsuitable and a different child must be selected. If SCP-1293-A deems the completed SCP-1293-A1 acceptable, it will devour it, thereby impregnating SCP-1293-A. The resulting SCP-1293 specimen will resemble the drawing on SCP-1293-A1.
Addendum SCP-1293-1: The following is a table listing examples of recorded Terpsichore Events:

Date
Event Description

04/17/1998
SCP-1293-B silently performed the choreography from the 1982 Broadway production Cats in its entirety.

11/02/1999
Splitting into four individual groups, SCP-1293-B performed all four acts of the Russian ballet La Bayadère3 simultaneously.

08/14/2004
SCP-1293-B laid face-down in three separate rows and undulated their bodies in a wavelike motion on the ground for roughly five (5) hours.

05/09/2007
SCP-1293-B engaged in Filipino tinikling,4 substituting bamboo with other SCP-1293-B.

01/22/2009
SCP-1293-B performed the choreography from music video for Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It) for thirty-nine (39) seconds before quickly dispersing in different directions.

Addendum SCP-1293-2: The following is an interview conducted with a pregnant SCP-1293-A specimen. SCP-1293-A used a number of words and phrases that do not correspond to any known language. These have been transcribed phonetically for the readability and integrity of this interview.

<Begin Log>
Dr. Reeves: Good morning. How are you feeling?
SCP-1293-A-4: Squeedly deedly dee! I'm apsa-tapsa-lutely wonderful, mister nice person type man! My loin child should be ready for regurgitationing in two shakes of a lamb's tail!
Dr. Reeves: Very good. Now, please take a moment to explain your selection process for children used in Procedure 722-Ephraim.
SCP-1293-A-4: I only look for childrens that are goodly and pure of heart! They also must have great, big, whale-sized imaginations!
Dr. Reeves: You only accept children belonging to researchers assigned to your containment. Why is this?
SCP-1293-A-4: If I used a stranger's childrens, that would just be squeedly weedly weird! Do you want to see me do a merry jig?
Dr. Reeves: No, thank you.
(SCP-1293-A-4 disregards Dr. Reeves and begins dancing.)
SCP-1293-A-4: (Singing) Wibbly wibbly woo, I wish I could hug big, beautiful you! Shmiggly shmaggly shmarms, I sadly don't have any arms!
Dr. Reeves: That's quite enough. Please try to focus on the interview. What are SCP-1293-C?
SCP-1293-A-4: You mean my whoopsy-daisies? It's not polite to ask a lady-type about her special monthly times, mister nosy posy!
Dr. Reeves: Any information you could give us on the nature of SCP-1293-C would be greatly beneficial in preventing personnel casualties.
SCP-1293-A-4: I'm sorry they come out so mean and scary! If I don't have the childrens' imagination seed in my wooble spot, I sploosh out things from my own imagination, and I'm afraid that's a very squeedly scary place!
Dr. Reeves: I'm not sure I—
SCP-1293-A-4: Oh, dear! My loin child cometh!
(SCP-1293-A-4 expells SCP-1293-A-5 from its mouth.)
SCP-1293-A-5: Greetings, loin mother! I am child!
SCP-1293-A-4: It is a lady-type! I am the happy for I have childrens!
SCP-1293-A-4 and SCP-1293-A-5, simultaneously: Squeedle deedle dee!
<End Log>

Addendum SCP-1293-3: The following is a message sent to Bio-Site Director Roward by Dr. Goodwin:

Hello,
As you are aware, I have been the head researcher for SCP-1293 since Dr. Reeves was terminated for unrelated reasons. Having spent roughly a year observing SCP-1293, I have come to the conclusion that present documentation of SCP-1293—particularly in regard to SCP-1293-A's reproductive process—is inaccurate and in urgent need of revision.
When I was first transferred to this project, I was surprised that Dr. Reeves had based much of SCP-1293's documentation on testimony by SCP-1293-A specimens. Feeling that it was not sufficient to go by SCP-1293-A's words alone, I put in place a number of new research guidelines, including the discreet video monitoring of SCP-1293 during the 24 hours following Procedure 722-Ephraim. The footage that we have since obtained has shown that specimens SCP-1293-A and SCP-1293-B, do, in fact, mate, using a thin, red tendril that extends from the male's mouth to the female's. Frankly, I am appalled that such a crucial aspect of SCP-1293 has not been previously documented.
Now that we know SCP-1293 reproduce by mating, that leaves the question of what Procedure 722-Ephraim accomplishes, as well as the question of what SCP-1293-C are. I have a theory that I believe addresses both these issues:
Contrary to current documentation, SCP-1293 do indeed feed, empathically drawing sustenance from human emotion. SCP-1293-A feed on feelings of unease and perturbation, and SCP-1293-B feed on feelings of confusion and bewilderment. SCP-1293-B are easily capable of subsisting on the feelings expressed by research personnel during Terpsichore Events, but SCP-1293-A must employ more elaborate methods of feeding. In addition to unsettling the children, SCP-1293-A forces us to use our own kids as a ploy to provoke an emotional reaction from jaded Foundation personnel. If SCP-1293-A has gone without "food" for an extended length of time, it will release SCP-1293-C as an emergency defense mechanism.
In order to test this theory, I propose that a revised version of SCP-1293's special containment procedures will be used on a trial basis. SCP-1293-A and SCP-1293-B are to be kept in separate habitats, as I believe they should have been when initially contained. Procedure 722-Ephraim will be altered to use D-Class personnel who have been provided fabricated information about SCP-1293 to enhance their levels of discomfort and anxiety during the process. Finally, now that we know the purpose of Terpsichore Events, a similar D-Class procedure will be put in place to ensure that SCP-1293-B will still be able to feed.
It is regrettable that it took this long to see these things for what they are, but I hope that with this knowledge, we will be able to contain SCP-1293 with greater efficiency.
— Goodwin

Revisions to SCP-1293's documentation and containment procedures are currently underway.

Footnotes
1. A similar orifice will be substituted if the mother does not possess a mouth.
2. The word "pregnant" is used in this article to describe SCP-1293-A's state between the execution of Procedure 722-Ephraim and the birth of a new SCP-1293. SCP-1293-A cannot be considered pregnant in a literal sense as they have no reproductive organs.
3. Also known as Баядерка and The Temple Dancer.
4. A traditional native dance that involves stepping between two pieces of bamboo that are continuously knocked together.

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