Arnekko 10/19/2014 (Friday) 12:03:22 #22456997

hey guys, happy spookmonth. just joined this site after hearing about it on 4chan. didn't really know where else to put this, but something weird's been happening over here for the last few weeks.

something is leaving hair all over the outside of my house.
for context, i live alone, right in the middle of nowhere. decided to move here a few years ago after my dad died and left me the place. when he was still alive, he fed me some shit about keeping the house he grew up in, getting close to nature, stuff like that. i didn't mind, though. he fixed it up real good with the money he got from day trading, and it wasn't the worst property in the world. there's good air, the view is immaculate, and it's… quiet, i guess. the nearest town is an hour's drive away, there's not much people here either. the nearest populated property is a few miles from where i live.
which is why i was kinda puzzled at what the hell was going on when i first saw that piece of hair on my porch. when i took a look at it, it was all kinds of wet and smelly, like it'd been shat out or something, maybe by an animal. first time it happened, i just shrugged it off and picked it up, then put it in the garbage bag for later. i thought maybe a big cat or a coyote or something ate its own fur, coughed it up. didn't really make much sense, but who was i know to know, right? it was just that one time.
the next day, it happened again.
a bunch of them, clumps of hair, left all over my front yard, wet and smelling way fucking worse than what i saw the day earlier. they were way larger too, just kind of spread out all over. a few of the larger clumps were smaller clumps clinging together, like something had torn them apart after it was left there. There were pieces of… what i think was shit clinging to it too, just these small coats of brown all over it. it was fucking gross. i packed it up with rubber gloves as soon as i could and threw it out into the forest. no way was that shit staying near me.
does anyone know if there are any animals that do this? i live in Oregon, so maybe there were mountain lions or cougars that coughed the hair up as hairballs? i'm stumped for answers here.

anarneler 10/19/2014 (Friday) 12:23:12 #1582243

Spooky
Though I'm not an expert on animals, but I have a cat at home and those don't look like hairballs to me???
Maybe the animals know in their bones that it's October or something and wanna spook you

kalelisnthisrealname 10/19/2014 (Friday) 13:33:22 #7643021

man you cant possibly believe that shit lmao, animals dont know whether its october or not

anarneler 10/19/2014 (Friday) 13:37:52 #1582243

I don't know what you believe but if you can gather some things on this site, October being an extra-scary time is one of them

kalelisnthisrealname 10/19/2014 (Friday) 13:39:52 #7643021

lol next youre gonna say halloween is magic xD miss me with that shit

anarneler 10/19/2014 (Friday) 13:45:52 #1582243

It's true. Things can come in at midnight, for example. If you stay on this site for long enough you'd know that
But yeah OP back to topic, that's no hairball. Check for any source of hair nearby

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/19/2014 (Friday) 12:26:54 #9245648

yea i came here to say this too, i agree with the poster above
that doesnt look like hairballs to me

kalelisnthisrealname 10/19/2014 (Friday) 12:35:22 #7643021

Inb4 someone's actually shitting out the hair and placing it on his lawn xD then on halloween theyll just come out of the forests and start shitting all over

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/19/2014 (Friday) 12:37:46 #9245648

dude thats fucking gross. and unhelpful, becuz i dont think op's joking

mit6789 10/22/2014 (Monday) 01:07:43 #91238501

so I know it's been a few days since this was posted… but maybe it was a raccoon getting into your septic tank… they always get their grubby hands on everything they see… especially since hair forms a thick film on the water if it's porous enough… do you flush hair down the toilet?

Arnekko 10/22/2014 (Monday) 5:24:32 #22456997

i do flush my hair down the toilet whenever i shave or i cut my hair (dad said the pipes wouldn't clog, they never did), but i went to double check the manhole to my septic tank and it's closed tight. no way a raccoon's gotten inside there.

mit6789 10/22/2014 (Monday) 5:25:32 #91238501

check the gaps between the manhole and the concrete… something could have gotten inside the gaps…

Arnekko 10/22/2014 (Monday) 5:26:45 #22456997

i don't really think i want to. yeah i've checked the gaps too and they seem fine. pretty big, i could kinda smell the shit in there as i bent down to look at it, but the gaps weren't big enough to fit anything bigger than a roach.
i haven't cleaned this thing out in years, so i'm not really a fan of going down there and finding out.

mit6789 10/22/2014 (Monday) 5:28:21 #91238501

ok… stay safe…

GANworld 10/23/2014 (Tuesday) 19:38:47 #51395481

LMAO you talk like my dad on facebook

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/23/2014 (Wednesday) 12:37:46 #9245648

hey op so ive been thinking on the thread for a while but youre rich right???? maybe you can get a sample of the hair and dna test it???? might help determine what kind of animal it is or something, test the septic tank theory and see if it's yours

Arnekko 10/23/2014 (Wednesday) 13:23:14 #22456997

lmao i don't think i'm as rich as you think i am but i'll consider it. i have a friend over at the lab in one of the nearby towns so maybe he'll give me a discount

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/23/2014 (Wednesday) 20:56:23 #9245648

EYYYY thats good OP, update us if you do it
also advanced happy halloween

Arnekko 10/24/2014 (Thursday) 16:47:12 #22456997

i'm at the end of my fucking tether.
went to my mom's last night to celebrate her birthday, came back to this.

i don't know what the fuck is doing this, but i've sprayed the entire yard with animal repellents of all kinds just to ward whatever it is the fuck off. i'm biting the bullet and doing that dna test too, get to the bottom of whatever the fuck this is. my friend says he can do it for one and a half grand.
i'm sick and fucking tired of cleaning this up every few days. i'm hooking up my brother's old baby monitor cam right next to my porch. see what fucking thing is doing this.
if it's a person, then i really really hope they're doing this as a joke

kalelisnthisrealname 10/24/2014 (Thursday) 18:33:22 #7643021

its coming for you op rofl xD
bets up that its gonna turn up on your house on halloween

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/24/2014 (Thursday) 19:33:56 #9245648

man, stop trolling

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/24/2014 (Thursday) 19:32:33 #9245648

holy fucking shit OP, that's a mess
hope you warded off whatever it is with all the sprays

Arnekko 10/24/2014 (Thursday) 20:22:10 #22456997

i hope so too.
i'm hunkering down for the next few nights. i'm going to sleep next to the baby monitor.
whatever this thing is, i want to know what it's doing.

Arnekko 10/25/2014 (Friday) 20:35:43 #22456997

first night, nothing. baby monitor only grabs the sound of wind. no how hard i try, i can't sleep.
got up a few times to check the outside. there was nothing there.

Arnekko 10/26/2014 (Saturday) 21:23:11 #22456997

second night, nothing. wind again. the sound of grass going with the breeze. found no hair anywhere.

Arnekko 10/27/2014 (Sunday) 00:32:19 #22456997

i can't sleep. every door in my house is locked tight.
i can't stop thinking about it. the hair. when i do sleep, what i get are nightmares. all i see is hair.

Arnekko 10/28/2014 (Monday) 01:57:01 #22456997

third night. nothing again.

couldn't sleep, just like the last few nights. scrolling through this thread has probably taken a toll on me.
i dreamt that i'd crawled out of a septic tank, that my entire body was made of hair. i could only taste shit, all the shit around me, floating around me. the shit that seeped into my body, that provided the glue that made it stick together.
i wanted to scream. but i couldn't.
the human larynx isn't meant to be made of hair.

Arnekko 10/29/2014 (Monday) 01:59:31 #22456997

been a few minutes. nothing still.
did i scare it off with the sprays?

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/29/2014 (Monday) 08:34:03 #9245648

i think you did, OP
must have been an animal or something

Arnekko 10/29/2014 (Monday) 09:03:22 #22456997

you think so?
false alarm then. thank fucking god.
my heart's racing, i can't stop thinking

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/29/2014 (Monday) 9:25:44 #9245648

welcome to parawatch, OP lmao
halloween's in a few days so someone/something just probably wanted to mess with you
did you get the results of the dna test

Arnekko 10/29/2014 (Monday) 9:43:35 #22456997

the dna test? fucking hell, can't believe i wasted more than a thousand dollars on that thing.
what a waste.
it'll come today, i think. my friend messaged me last night

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/29/2014 (Monday) 9:57:26 #9245648

at least the dangers gone xD
now you can at least find out what the hell it was

Arnekko 10/29/2014 (Monday) 13:22:35 #22456997

yeah, i did. i got the results just now.

the hair's mine.

whoparawatchestheparawatchersthemselves 10/29/2014 (Monday) 13:37:07 #9245648

holy fuck.
what are you gonna do now?

Arnekko 10/29/2014 (Monday) 13:23:58 #22456997

i'm opening the septic tank.

Arnekko 10/29/2014 (Monday) 13:23:58 #22456997

i don't understand. i don't understand. i don't understand. i don't understand.
i've lived here for years. i haven't emptied it in years. it should be full. it should be full.

i think it came from the tank.

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 04:34:23 #22456997

help me, please. help me. help me.
the hair's come back.
every single time the hair appeared, it was outside my house. on my backyard. my front yard. my porch.

this morning it was right outside my bedroom door.

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 04:36:23 #22456997

HE'S PLAYING WITH ME
i hear the footsteps outside
i've locked my door
i won't let him come in
he can't come in
help me please
IF SOMEONE'S THERE PLEASE HELP ME

kalelisnthisrealname 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 04:36:23 #7643021

dafuq?

🗿 ALASIMALARRI 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 08:36:23 #98678432

User Arnekko, you are warned to stop making nonsensical posts. Write coherently. This will be your first warning.
This is an official staff post. Do not reply.

kalelisnthisrealname 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 12:22:23 #22456997

yeah lmao i think the guy's having a mental breakdown xD
advance happy halloween op

earth_is_an_egg 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 16:36:23 #77813321

Yeah, I call bullshit. You were getting us pretty good there, but you've taken the joke wayyyyy too far now
If this is real then yeah I think you're going a bit cuckoo, OP. What if it's just you planting the hair?

sworddegloss 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 19:36:23 #66466523

Cant wait to have my very own hair monster leaving me gifts every day, maybe halloween is their christmas

ame-namen 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 21:22:23 #44356671

Yeah preach
we'll buy you your meds OP

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:21:56 #22456997

i can hear him outside
i can feel him
he knows what i know
he sees through my eyes
he's trying to control me
please help me

we are one and the same.

ame-namen 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:25:45 #44356671

Yeah I don't think there's much substance here anymore
good arg though

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:23:31 #22456997

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP
STOP DOING THIS
WE AREN'T THE SAME
STOP SAYING THAT
WE AREN'T THE SAME
WE AREN'T THE SAME

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:23:56 #22456997

we are.

sworddegloss 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:25:17 #66466523

Is he talking to himself???

earth_is_an_egg 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:26:15 #77813321

I think they are
What the fuck?

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:27:47 #22456997

STOP MOVING ME
STOP SAYING THAT
WE AREN'T THE SAME
WE AREN'T THE SAME
WE AREN'T THE SAME
WE AREN'T THE SAME
WE AREN'T THE SAME
WE AREN'T THE SAME

🗿 Canadaaintreal 10/30/2014 (Tuesday) 22:30:22 #78445211

I agree with ame-namen. There's not much sense here anymore. If this is some kind of ARG for Halloween, it doesn't belong here.
Going to have to declare this thread closed.
This is an official staff post. Do not reply.

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Thursday) 22:31:24 #22456997

fine. i'll prove it to you.

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Thursday) 22:31:58 #22456997

hair.
we shed it. we leave it. we throw it away.
honestly, i just found it so weird how, in stories, hair seems to contain some essence of us. witches use hair to cast their spells; shamans use it in their rituals when they need to curse its owner; hell, even lovers give each other their locks of hair as mementos.
it's almost as if hair carries a force. a life force. a part of us, though, i concede, just a small spark of what makes us who we are.
the thing is… hair's a part of us just as much as our face is. as our identity is. as our flesh is.
yet… we dispose of it again and again. we flush it down the toilet. we let it clog up our pipes. we let it accumulate, over years and years, a piece of us just thrown away as trash.
that… doing that… why would you ever do that?
after all, what happens when those sparks of you, over years and years of clumping together, coming together, merging together…
what happens when time finally gives it that last touch of life?
what happens when it starts to become you?
what happens when it wants to replace you?
what happens when it realizes how unworthy you are of being alive?
because… let me remind you… there is hair everywhere on your body.
who knows how far its influence can extend?

after all… it's almost halloween.
creepy things can happen on halloween.
isn't that right, Arnold?

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Thursday) 22:36:37 #22456997

THAT WASN'T ME
THAT WASN'T ME
THAT WASN'T ME

🗿 ALASIMALARRI 10/30/2014 (Thursday) 22:56:11 #98678432

User Arnekko, this thread has been declared closed. Please do not make any further posts.
This is your second warning. Action will be taken on your third offense.
This is an official staff post. Do not reply.

Arnekko 10/30/2014 (Thursday) 22:59:54 #22456997

NO PLEASE YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME
HE'S PLAYING WITH ME
HE'S BEEN PLAYING WITH ME SINCE THE START
HE'S JUST BEEN WAITING FOR ME TO REALIZE
HE WANTS TO TAKE CONTROL OF ME
HE WANTS TO BECOME ME
I ONLY HAVE ANOTHER HOUR
HE CAN'T COME IN FOR ANOTHER HOUR
PLEASE HELP ME
HE'S ALREADY GOTTEN INSIDE MY HEAD
he's trying to make me open the door.

Arnekko 10/31/2014 (Wednesday) 00:00:35 #22456997

it's midnight. he opened the door himself.

+ Show

- Hide

now we're back together again.