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Slice of Forum Life
Parawatch format tale (not a creepypasta)
~~ More Alan Stuff ~~


admartin 03/03/10 (Thu) 00:13:21 #87564256

Odd question: can food be paranormal? Because I think that recently I've experienced some of it first-hand.
Me and a group of friends have a habit of gathering every week at one dude's place to… basically do nothing productive. Our meetings usually consisted of drinking, playing console games, occasionally watching movies, drinking again, you get the point. Then some of my friends got into cooking. It was simple dishes at first, but the list of recipes grew, and eventually cooking was added to our list of activities. We thought it'd be fun to try ourselves at making something eatable, even if most of the time we failed.
That's when it all began. For the past several weeks, every time, they'd cook the same meal: chocolate brownies. Not ordinary ones though. They won't let me to the kitchen while they cook for some reason, and weird stuff starts to happen right after they start eating. The guys' faces become uncanny grimaces with unfocused eyes and mouths that barely move when they talk. They move clumsily, can't think straight… It just seems like they aren't themselves, you know? Like something invaded their bodies and took control.
The guys suggested I taste one, and while I'd rather refuse, I also didn't feel like making them angry in that state. I bit into it, and in a couple of minutes, it took me: my mind became clouded, anxiety kicked in, paranoid thoughts started appearing outta nowhere. Nearly got a panic attack right there. A minute later I grabbed my coat and left, I don't think they even noticed.
Honestly, I'm not sure I even want to continue meeting with them. Well, maybe only to investigate those weird brownies further. Are there any experiences similar to mine?

graysnake 03/03/10 (Thu) 01:14:59 #17685748

Brownies are fucking paranormal and that's a fact. The same goes for the people who can cook them without turning the whole thing into a disgusting, hard to chew mess. So yeah, quickly barricade yourself and report your friends to the FBI.

notanundercoveragent 03/03/10 (Thu) 06:42:23 #87544822

What. @admartin you're not serious about this, right? Your friends are just adding some weird shit into those brownies to get stoned, it's not paranormal.
Seriously, we went from the terrifying deep-sea horrors and series of unsolved murders to this? I knew all those Reddit posts and creepypasta channels will do this forum more harm than good.

professionalclown 03/03/10 (Thu) 22:14:11 #48265728

That story is a big mood. I have a similar one, it's a lot worse tho. To be fair I still wake up in cold sweat due to nightmares I have of that night.
Basically, I came over to my friend's house when his family was out of town. He promised that he'll have booze, some meals and plenty of fun things to do. Everything went well enough, but then I went to the kitchen and saw what he was going to eat. Honestly, I'm still not sure what it was all about, maybe my so-called friend was secretly a member of satanic cult, or he just decided to explore some dark fetishes… But when I saw that meal, I nearly threw up. We've never talked after that, I ran away from that place, deleted his phone number and tried my best to forget what I witnessed.
I'll attach an image of that thing here if any of you feel brave enough.

+ horribleperversion.jpg

- horribleperversion.jpg

admartin 03/04/10 (Fri) 09:13:21 #76584726

Guys please, I really wanted to know your opinion.
It's important, maybe my friends discovered something they shouldn't have. Who really knows what's out there, waiting to take control and make us suffer just for fun? There are so many threads about mysterious murders, disappearances and other horrible things happening to regular people. I wouldn't like any of my close ones to be the next protagonists of those posts.

underwater_unicorn 03/04/10 (Fri) 20:44:59 #22765849

Yeah can we take OP a bit more seriously? Food that can fuck up your mind really exists. Once I was out of town and visited some shitty cafe near a road for a burger. I was practically starving back then and didn't have much choice. The meat itself wasn't anything special, but it had this odd aftertaste that I can't forget. I want more of it so badly, sometimes it becomes hard to control myself. I literally ate a plate of ground beef once, but this wasn't that meat, so it didn't help.
I started seeing dreams and visions about the meat, its greasy red chunks moving around me, calling me to devour them whole. My mouth was so full of saliva it dripped on the floor, and I just tore into the meat with my teeth, nearly biting my fingers off. It felt amazing, like I was becoming one with the divine red substance I was consuming.
Seriously, I can't tell anyone I know IRL about this, it's too weird. Can someone help me? Please.

crilasxove 03/04/10 (Fri) 22:05:22 #17564758

@underwater_unicorn: hot.

🗿lord_benedict 03/05/10 (Sat) 23:03:32 #67578475

Ugh. Okay guys, I get that y'all still on your toes after the April fools, and we got a couple of laughs here, but let's wrap up this whole conversation. You're posting in the forum section dedicated to real paranormal sightings and serious discussions.
Additionally, @professionalclown: stop posting that image in every topic you go to. This was funny the first time, but the joke is long since overdone by now. Consider this an official warning.
I'll be locking this thread shortly.

underwater_unicorn 03/05/10 (Sat) 23:42:11 #57462857

No mod please you don't understand. I need help. My dreams are all saliva and grease and red chunks, it's pulsating constantly luring me in calling MY NAME.
 [USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST]

admartin 03/06/10 (Sun) 08:11:25 #87564256

So uh, hello again. I'm a bit surprised that this thread got so much attention, and would like to apologize to the mod for the trouble it might've caused. I just wanted to tell that I've finished my investigation. Well, yes, you were right, it was just weed.
It's not illegal in where I live, but the guys didn't know how I'd react. They agree that the situation was a bit of an overkill, so we're going to be more careful from now on. I probably overreacted a bit in my original post. My body just didn't react well to this stuff the first time and coupled with my general anxiety in that situation, it made for an unpleasant experience. So nothing paranormal here, I just got high.

🗿lord_benedict 03/06/10 (Sun) 11:03:32 #12734582

> admartin: I just got high
If only I had a nickel for every time paranormal sightings were explained by that sentence.
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Surveillance report
Subject: Data concerning GoI-1109 "Parawatch"
———————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————
Greetings. I'm glad to inform you that I've finished my initial observation period over GoI-1109 and can draw certain conclusions. First of all, let me say that I completely understand why this forum was given such a high priority upon its initial discovery. After all, they're interested in the same things we try to keep secret, and the intelligence was right to theorize that it might lead to a serious information leak or even a partial broken masquerade scenario.
However, after my stay here, I can surely say: it cannot. Those people aren't very elaborate truth-seekers, to put it lightly. I don't think they'd figure something out even if we provided them with direct access to the entire SCP database. I'll continue being active there, mainly to prevent some accidental data leakage and to trip them up if they somehow find the right track (even though I find this scenario extremely unlikely). In the meantime, I'd suggest lowering the GoI's priority and refraining from taking further actions.
Let's just let Parawatch exist in its own echo chamber for now.