In fact, the institutional Church regularly uses dehumanizing language to refer to gays. "Intrinsically disordered" is seen, IMHO correctly, by homosexuals to refer to them, not some amorphous "tendency".

You have apparenty bought into the idea that the reason for having sexual intercourse is procreation. Are you married? If so, wouldn't you agree that procreation is not the main reason you have sex with your wife. If you do agree, then according to what you say, your sexual intercourse is "purely self-gratifying". AND WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT? Is pleasure, for its own sake, something to be avoided? When you eat, do you deliberately make your food unpalatable? Do you deny yourself all entertainment? 

Also, consider this: Do you really think that God is as hung up on sex as some apparently imagine? The Bible devotes hardly any space to sexual sins, but goes on at great length on social sins.