A Guide On How to Survive in the U.S. Illegally

Step 1.  Cross the border without invitation or proper documentation. You are now a criminal guilty of a misdemeanor.
Step 2.  Pretend Step 1 didn’t happen or is irrelevant
Step 3. Protest at every opportunity and demand YOUR right to stay in the U.S. illegally.
Step 4. If deported, immediately cross the border once again, now guilty of a felony.
Step 5.  Repeat Steps 2 and 3.