Oh, one more really important point. A key reason kids can remain in foster care so long without adoption is this idea that what is best for them is keeping them with "family." When that family is drug and alcohol addicted, and/or emotional unstable, then the child winds up staying in foster care year after year after year...given false hope by parents and a system who if they were honest would acknowledge that the child will likely never be best with those parents. There should be a time limit on how long a child must wait. And children cannot often make this decision for themselves. Some people were not meant to be parents... and waiting and dreaming that they will is abusive and cruel to kids.