Input: .
Generate a negative review for a place
Output: I have a love-hate relationship with Montana Meat Company. Lunch seems to be the best way to go because service is very slow during the morning and it seems like they made their steak and egg special smaller. I met my parents here in the morning and I ordered it. When it came to our table, my dad said (in his accent), "Why is your steak so leetle? Look how small it is!" and he started laughing. It really did look very small and it was also kind of dry. Here's a pic of it next to my car key: http://s3-media1.ak.yelpcdn.com/bphoto/DTBGYRXl28VbAiQECnyiHw/l.jpg. I always enjoy their potatos and eggs though; Can't go wrong with those. I was just pretty disappointed this time around because of the slow service and tiny piece of meat on my plate.

Input: .
Generate a positive review for a place
Output: If there was an option for a sixth star Fogo de Chao would receive it. They are five shining stars on every level. From food, to service, to ambiance they really take the cake in the "eat all the meat you can" category. Without a doubt one of my favorite restaurants I've ever been to. For starters, they have one of the most beautifully displayed salad bars I've ever seen. If I didn't know you could eat 17 pounds of finely grilled meats I would probably just eat the salad bar and call it a day. But because of the meats, that's just something I cannot commit to. Great salad, awesome toppers, dressings are very good. You even have the option of getting prosciutto, bacon, and fresh bread. But you're reading this review not because you are a vegetarian, you're reading it because the carnivorous instincts have taken control of your palate. Well fear not my friend, you have made a wise choice in considering Fogo de Chao to be your last meal (you see, it may be your last meal because you quite possibly could keel over after the amount of food you are about to consume). They have somewhere around 14 different cuts of meat. There are options of pork, chicken, and lamb. The pork is exceptionally tender and juicy. My favorite cut of meat that they have is the Filet Mignon and the House Cut. Both are extremely tender and juicy, full of flavor, and cooked to whatever preference you have (anything but medium rare or rare is just a travesty in my opinion though). The side dishes you get for "fillers" are really good. My two favorites are the garlic mashed potatoes and the cheese bread/rolls you receive when you first sit down (save room, you may eat a bakers dozen). Here's one tip though, take your time. You control your meat destiny with a little card that can be flipped green, meaning you want more meat, or red, meaning you are enjoying what you currently have. First time I went here I was on green-time the whole time and my plate was a meat extravaganza. I was overwhelmed with beef. The next time I smartened up and enjoyed my favorite cuts and took my time. A much more enjoyable experience for a seasoned Fogo veteran. Meat! Meat! Meat!

Input: .
Generate a negative review for a place
Output: I purchased a groupon for my step-daughter and I to have a fun girls night together. Please keep in mind my step daughter is 9; they put dark pink almost red lipstick on her and felt insulted when I did not want her to wear such an adult color. They curled her hair in large barrel curls and said there how does she look? I asked if they were going to finish her hair and they said it was done. I fluffed and styled her hair; thankfully I was a hairstylist for 10 years and knew what I was doing. They did the same to my hair; again I styled and fluffed it. They used the cheapest hair products you can get from Walmart; I felt if they were charging as much as they were they would use product that would actually work well and wash out afterwards. I am blonde and have very light complected skin and yet the stylist felt I would look great with black eyebrows! Thankfully we were able to wash it off. I was able to finish my make-up on my own since the stylist was more interested in making me look like a clown. Oh and by the way, she used a public brush to apply my lipstick. The entire staff looked disheveled in their attire. Half the staff were unable to speak or understand English. The place was filthy! The picture I chose of my step-daughter had a full shot of her head in the snap shot they showed us on their public viewing screen; however, when I received them the other day the top of her head is not there; once in a frame she has no hair. I am very disappointed in the experience and the pictures we received. Spent way too much even with the groupon. I would have been mordified if it was full price. My next complaint will be to the owner; especially since the manager did not seem to care. My biggest advice is spend the money to go to the salon and then to Penny's or even Walmart to get the pictures taken. Much better staff and picture results. If you have purchased a groupon you can still get your money back if you have not used it.

Input: .
Generate a positive review for a place
Output:
We caught last night's showing of Bite. Great seats, close to the stage, but to be honest, just about any seat in the theatre is going to be a good one. The music was upbeat, the girls looked great, though I -personally- would have liked to see a little more variety offered in body style, and the dancing was good. The girls who preformed the more gymnastic routines really shined. The aerial acrobatics were well done, if short, and the spot on the ribbon could have been better. And I loved the "Slo-Mo" in the "Fight" scene myself, but overall, it was a fun, cheesy time. I didn't really expect much, to be honest, just wanted to see what a Vegas Vampire show was all about.