Summarize the following:
When you really like someone, you tend to focus on their positives. This is particularly the case when you can't have them. But this isn't reality: everyone has flaws and it would be good for you to think about them instead of what you like about the person. Make a list of why the relationship wouldn't work. Also, write down what you don't particularly like about the person. Refer back to it when you're feeling down about not being able to be with the person. If you can't be together because the other person doesn't want to, simply accept that there's nothing you can do about it. No matter what you say or do, the person is still likely going to feel the same way. Stop getting your hopes up and torturing yourself by trying to convince them otherwise. It may also help to be frank with yourself. You might say, "Get a grip, Samantha. You can't date Peter because he's married. He's off-limits." Otherwise, if the person can't see how valuable you are, then they don't deserve you. Remember to tell yourself this at times when you are feeling low. Having self-love right now is key to moving on. Do things that make you feel strong and empowered. Focus on nurturing yourself, such as with positive affirmations, pampering, and doing other activities that you enjoy. For example, if you have a favorite hobby, then setting aside time each day or a few times per week to do that would be a good way to practice self-compassion. Self-love and compassion may also translate to taking it easy on yourself. Be okay with less-than-perfect work performance. Allow yourself a night off to binge-watch TV shows or movies. Call a friend to let them know you're feeling low. It may be wise to seek the help of a therapist if you are struggling with self-esteem problems. The therapist may be able to encourage you to see just how valuable you are and this may help you to move on.
Avoid idealizing the person. Accept that you can't be with them. Practice self-compassion.