Some partners prefer not to hear the details of the affair, but if knowing them will help you forgive and recover, ask. Try to focus on emotional questions rather than logistical questions. For example, instead of asking which hotel they met in, ask your husband why he decided to cheat. This is a healthier way to move towards forgiveness. Ask questions you need to know the answers to. For example, ask your husband if he's been tested or is willing to be tested for STIs (also known as STDs). Ask your husband if he intends to leave you or if he wants to stay and make the relationship work. Clarifying this as soon as possible will help you prepare for the future and move forward. Affairs can bring up many feelings, fears, and insecurities. For example, if you're worried about him cheating again, you're concerned he doesn't love you, or you can't get over how unfair this is toward you, say this to him. It's important for him to know how the affair affects you and what difficulties you are facing in moving forward. When talking about your feelings, keep them focused on yourself by using "I" statements. This will allow you to express yourself without going into blaming or shaming your husband. For example, say, "I feel so hurt and disappointed." He may have excuses or he may have a lot of regret, sorrow and self-loathing to share with you. Hearing your husband take responsibility for his actions and express empathy toward you can be comforting. It can take some time to accept his words as meaningful and truthful. If you both want your marriage to continue, it is important your husband shows remorse for his actions. While you should try to support his needs in the marriage, you should not have to accept blame for his cheating. Ideally, you do not want the affair to be the center of your relationship. You don't want to completely ignore the affair, yet you also don't want it to be the only thing you discuss together. Boundaries can help you discuss it in a healthy and productive way. For example, if one of you wants to bring it up, make sure you have enough time to have a real discussion. If talking about it has become all you talk about, take some steps back and make some boundaries together, like only talking about it once each day or once each week. If you and your husband have children, agree not to discuss the affair with them. If you're choosing to forgive your husband and move on in your relationship together, make sure your husband is on the same page. He should be clear in saying that he wants the relationship to work and be rebuilt. If he's unsure about moving forward or seems more inclined to divorce, talk about it further. If you know you want to divorce, let him know that clearly. If you and your husband want to keep your marriage and improve your relationship, you should make a new commitment to each other. When you are ready, you can return to physical intimacy as well.

Summary: Ask questions you need answers to. Talk about how you feel about the affair. Listen to how your husband feels. Create boundaries for talking about the affair. Confirm the outcome of your relationship.

A rug can tie a whole space together, so try putting one beside your bistro table or in front of your bench. Be sure the rug is labeled as either "outdoor" or "indoor/outdoor." If it's going to be outside, it must be weather-resistant, or it will retain water and get moldy. Wherever you can, add outdoor pillows and cushions. Put them on your bistro chairs, your bench, or your reading chair. You can even toss them on the floor for extra seating. They'll soften the space and make it feel more inviting so that you actually want to go out there. Even if your cushions are weather-resistant, it's still important to bring them inside or stick them in a storage bench before it rains. This will prolong the life of your cushions. You may want neutral tones for big things like tables and chairs, but accessories are your chance to add color. Choose blues and greens for a beachy or spa-like feel, or go with pinks and purples for a vibrant Caribbean flair. If you love to grill for your friends, you'll probably want to make this the highlight of your balcony. Check your lease to see if there are any restrictions on grills on your building. For instance, some landlords may not allow charcoal grills. If you don't have room for a big gas grill, look into a portable grill that you can stow in the corner or in an indoor closet when not in use. Wrapping a string of Christmas lights around your railing can give your balcony a charming touch. If you don't have any outdoor access to electricity, then buy some solar-powered string lights. You can also add some candles to your bistro or side table for a more romantic vibe.
Summary: Lay down an outdoor rug. Add pillows. Go bold with color. Set up a grill. Add lighting.