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Again when you're looking at other people, you're looking at their highlight reel. So don't do it. When you catch yourself doing it, stop. Just stop. Remind yourself that it's the highlight reel you're watching, and that reel is pretty darn short. And if you have some comparison void that needs filling, just compare you to you. How are you improving? What skills do you have now that you didn't before? How are you a better person? What have you learned? After all, in the race that's life, you're your fiercest competition. Seriously. Take out a piece of paper and a pen (or your phone) and write them down. What do you like about yourself? Don't stop until you have at least five. Is it a talent? A physical attribute? A personality trait? If you can't think of any (you're not alone), ask a few close friends or family members what they think your best qualities are. Besides, there's tons of research that says others know us better than we know ourselves. When you're feeling down for the count, bust out this list or remember back to its contents. Take on an attitude of gratitude and those insecurities may just start slipping away. Look online for lists of self affirmations that could also be used if one cannot come up with positive qualities. In order to love ourselves, our minds have to see some proof that we do. If someone treated you terribly you wouldn't believe they loved you, and the same goes for you. Here's what to keep in mind: Take care of your body. Exercise, eat healthy, get enough sleep, and keep it at 100% as often as possible. This is the bare minimum. Take care of your space. If you live in a pile of potato chip bags, you probably aren't going to feel ready to take on the world. What's more, you need to take care of your mental space, too. Practice meditation, do yoga, or find some other way to keep your mind stress-free. Take care of your time. In other words, make time to A) relax, and B) do what you love. With these two things, happiness falls in line a large obstacle to self-acceptance. Hopefully you treat you right and you know how you should treat you, but what about others? Define your boundaries in other words, what will you and will you not put up with? What violates your definition of "okay?" Why is this important? Because you have rights and you deserve to be treated the way you want to be treated. You just have to know how you want to be treated to begin. A good example is how long you'll wait for a late friend. You could make a rule that you won't wait longer than 30 minutes. If they snooze, you're outta there. After all, your time is valuable you are valuable. If they don't respect that, they're disrespecting you. And if they do respect you, they'll be on time. "Fake it till you make it" isn't just some conveniently rhyming, trite piece of advice. In fact, science says it works. Even faking confidence convinces others you're more confident, competent, and can lead to more opportunities and better results. So if you need that extra dose of confidence, lean on your acting skills. Everyone will be none the wiser. Don't know where to start? Go through your body and consciously release your muscles that are holding tension. When we get nervous, we physically tense up. Letting your muscles go is a cue to your mind and those around you that you're cool as a cucumber.
If you do compare yourself to someone, compare yourself to you. List out all your good qualities. Take care of your body, your space, and your time. Define your boundaries. When in doubt, fake it.