Problem: Write an article based on this summary: Manage conflict but drop the drama. Laugh. Enjoy the ordinary and the mundane. Connect. Respect and be respected. Talk about the future. Share everything. Look for fireworks. Put "we" before "me. Live the relationship more than you talk about it.

Answer: Everyone argues with those they feel close to. The strongest relationships involve partners who argue, but do so with resolution in mind. If you don't argue at all, it's a bad sign. If even the simplest arguments turn into week-long drama-fests, it's also a bad sign. When couples don't fight, it usually means that one or both people are not being entirely honest. When needs, desires, and difficulties are not voiced, they are not addressed, and the relationship remains weakened. Healthy arguments are free of violence in all its forms: verbal and physical. The fights are fair, and no one tries to manipulate the other party. The two of you should be able to laugh with each other and at each other. There should be room for seriousness in a serious relationship, of course, but you also need to balance that out with a healthy dose of humor. The teasing that goes on between you two should be gentle and playful, though. If one person routinely breaks into tears, you're doing something wrong. If the two of you need constant chatter and excitement to make your relationship work, it could be a sign that your relationship won't work, or it may just mean that your relationship is still too new to predict the future. Enjoying the mundane means wanting to learn the little details about your partner's past and present life. Enjoying the ordinary also means feeling content to sit in and spend a quiet evening together. It's natural to crave excitement from time to time, but you need to be able to enjoy your partner's presence during the dull times, as well. The two of you should connect in little ways and big ways. Look for shared interests and similar quirks. Also ask yourself if the two of you share similar priorities and goals. If the two of you have different goals, your lives will naturally move in different directions. For example, if you want to settle down, marry, and have children, but your partner wants to explore the world and has no interest in raising kids, the things you want out of life may simply be too different to make things work. Hobbies and everyday interests are less important than goals, but still worth paying attention to. Having one or two shared interests will make it easier for you to spend time together. The more unusual or obscure those interests are, the better. A strong relationship is built around respect and commitment. You need to be able to respect your partner, but you also need a partner who will respect you in equal amounts. Respect leads to everything else a healthy relationship requires: commitment, trust, communication, and general satisfaction. Without respect, none of these other qualities can take root. Think about past conversations the two of you had concerning the future. When the topic comes up, both of you should feel comfortable discussing it, and both of you should be able to picture the other as a part of your own future. Your talks about the future don't always need to be serious. If it's still early in your relationship, you might casually of the things you should do together "next month" or "next year." As your commitment grows, however, the two of you should be able to talk about your long-term future and the rest of your lives. Your significant other should be the one person you want to share everything with. "Everything" means just about everythingexciting news, fears, that great new coffee shop you found, and so on. Ask yourself how often you stumble upon interesting things you want to share with your partner later on. The more often this happens, the more deeply rooted that person is in your mind. A deep connection signifies a deeper level of commitment. More significantly, honesty needs to feel natural for both of you. If you find yourself keeping secrets or know that your partner routinely hides information from you, that's a bad sign. While a committed relationship definitely runs deeper than mere physical attraction, good chemistry is also important. Fireworks do not need to go off every time your eyes meet, but there should at least be an occasional spark. Physical intimacy and emotional intimacy are closely related. You need both to balance out a romantic relationship. " Both of you should have a greater interest in working through things together than working through them separately. You may need to put the welfare of the relationship above your own individual desires from time to time, and you both should be okay with doing so when the situation really calls for it. The first "we" thoughts are usually positive. The mind shifts from "what am I doing this weekend?" to "what are we doing this weekend?" Eventually, though, your "we" thoughts need to shift to more serious matters. For instance, if you're offered a new job in a different location, you should be just as interested in how it will affect your future as a couple instead of only thinking of how it will affect your future as an individual. Ask yourself how much time you spend being together and how much time the two of you spend talking about how things or and how they should be. Being able to live in the "now" is important if you want to stay together in the future. Of course, you need to be able to address issues and desires as they come up. If these problems preoccupy you too often, though, it's a signal that things don't flow naturally between the two of you.

Problem: Write an article based on this summary: Cultivate optimism. Avoid overgeneralizing negative outcomes. Make space for the gray areas of life. Learn to laugh at yourself. Reflect on your situation objectively.

Answer:
Mood swings are often associated with persistent expectations for bad things to happen or, in other words, negative thinking. For example, you might be waiting to hear back from a job and assume you didn't get it after only a day has passed. Or maybe your mother has informed you that she has something to tell you and you immediately assume that she's deathly ill. Not only is this kind of negative thinking often inaccurate, but it can also dramatically affect your mood and lead you to feel very angry and upset, typically for little to no "real" reason. There are two different tricks you can try for dealing with such unhealthy automatic thinking: Take a step back and relax. Instead of assuming the worst that can happen, think about all of the other possible scenarios. This will help you realize that the worst is not likely to happen and that there's no point in getting all upset until you know more information. Alternately, you could consider the worst possible scenario and prepare for it, just in case. By ensuring that you are well prepared for even the worst case scenario you can imagine, you might be able to focus your attention on something else instead of dwelling on the unpredictable consequences that could result from it. Overgeneralizing is another way that you may lead yourself into a bad mood. Maybe you had a bad interaction on a date or with a co-worker. So what? You may think this means that you'll never find love or that you're going to be fired, but you shouldn't let this one situation or conversation make you feel like it's indicative or determinant of other trends in your life. This kind of generalizing is bound to make you moody and upset, but there is a way to counteract it. Remind yourself that what happened was an isolated incident. Instead of assuming one incident (such as a disagreement with a coworker or date) is reflective of your entire relationship with this person, consider it as a one-off and something that doesn't happen very often. Remind yourself of all of the success you have had in this realm, whether it's your work life or your romantic life, and you'll be able to calm down a bit and realize that there's no need to get all worked up about it. Thinking only in terms of extreme, or "black and white" outcomes (e.g., perfect vs. disastrous or beautiful vs. ugly, etc.) is associated with both mood swings and sudden alterations in effect. Focusing too much on just one outcome (as opposed to any other) has been shown to severely restrict your ability to engage with ideas and emotions that arise through your interactions with the world. If everything is judged simply in black or white terms, such as whether something makes you either happy or unhappy, successful or a failure, beautiful or ugly, you will be missing out on a full range of experiences. It's important to remember that the world is much more nuanced than this; the world is gray, not black and white. There are many different outcomes other than just being a complete success or a total failure. For example, maybe your latest business deal fell through. Does this make you a failure in the business world? Absolutely not. You've had plenty of successes and a few setbacks. This in fact just makes you a real and well-rounded human being. If something doesn't go your way, chalk it up to experience. If you didn't get the job you wanted, it doesn't mean that you have no skills, but that that particular opportunity was not a good fit. The world is big, and there are lots of opportunities out there! Don't let one rejection or even many tell you who you are and drive you into a dark emotional place. One of the most important things you can do to control your mood swings is to learn to take a step back and laugh at yourself. People who are prone to mood swings often take themselves pretty seriously, which makes it difficult to be able to poke fun at yourself, make a joke at your own expense, or even be able to laugh at a debacle you've found yourself in. But if you want to control your mood swings, then you have to be able to sit back and sometimes laugh, instead of letting every little thing that life throws at you get you riled up. For example, you're walking to pick up your date, and a bird poops on your head. You could choose to get enraged, upset, or frustrated, or you can take a step back and think, "Wow, what are the chances of that happening?" Or, "Hey, at least I'll have a great story to tell the kids someday about mine and mom's first date!" Of course, some situations can't be laughed at. However, for all the rest, some happiness can help you stay strong and in control of your moods in the middle of challenging situations. Take a step back and think. You might need to pause and adjust your expectations so that they reflect the true state of the situation. Sometimes, you may feel a mood coming on because you have to spend 15 minutes circling around the supermarket's parking lot to look for a spot. Though you may feel like it's the end of the world right then and there, take a moment to think about what is really upsetting you. Is it really that crazy that the supermarket is full right before the weekday dinner hour? Are you crazy about something silly like having to find a parking spot or because of a rude coworker's pointless comment earlier in the day? Ask yourself if it's really a big deal in the grand scheme of things. Maybe it is, but it's likely that you're letting something small blow out of proportion. We can often let moods come over us without thinking about their source. Though knowing that there's no logic in your current mood may not help you change it, it can allow you to calm down a bit and realize that things aren't as bad as they may feel to you. Think about your situation as if you were someone else. What would you tell yourself to do? Would you think that the situation you're in is really that big of a deal?