INPUT ARTICLE: Article: One good way of documenting the emotional abuse is to record it in a journal. Write down what the abuser said, the date, and how it made you feel. Also note the names of any witnesses. You may also find that writing a journal is cathartic and an effective defense mechanism against the emotional abuse. However, you should be careful that you do not leave the journal lying around. If you live with the abuser, then the abuser could find the journal. Instead of keeping a clothbound journal, you could keep a digital one. Take notes on your smart phone or laptop and store them electronically. It is much harder to find your notes on an electronic device, especially if it is password protected. You should hold onto any letter, email, note, or voicemail in which the abuser uses abusive language. This evidence will help you later establish the abuser's behavior. If you live with the abuser, then see if a trusted friend or family member will hold onto copies of these communications. Emotional abuse can manifest itself in physical symptoms: anxiety, weight loss, high blood pressure, depression, and heart disease. Although emotional abuse is serious regardless of any resulting physical symptoms, the presence of these symptoms will increase your ability to prove emotional abuse at a later date. Tell your doctor about the emotional abuse. By reporting it, your doctor can make a note in your medical records. A copy of your medical reports will then serve as powerful evidence of the emotional abuse and its physical effects on you. If you are taking a child or elderly adult to the doctor, then you can inform the doctor that you think the person is being emotionally abused. The doctor can then talk to the patient and draw out helpful information. You can help prove emotional abuse if you document the abuse someone else is suffering. You need to write down the dates the abuse happened and the substance of the abuse, just as you would if you were the victim. Some people might hesitate to tell someone else that they are being abused. The elderly, for example, may feel embarrassed that they are powerless. Children may be fear that you will believe the things the abuser says about them. To put people at ease, simply ask them what they are feeling. This strategy can help them open up. If you are experiencing emotional abuse, then you should share that fact with at least one trusted person. It is always difficult to come forward and admit that you are in an abusive relationship. However, a witness can help confirm your history of abuse. Find someone you trust. You may fear physical violence from your abuser. You don't want the person you confide in to tell other people. In that situation, the abuser could find out that you have been complaining about him or her and strike back.

SUMMARY: Keep a journal. Preserve abusive communications. Visit the doctor. Ask abuse victims what they are feeling. Share your feelings with other people.

INPUT ARTICLE: Article: Often, when something is wrong in a relationship, one or both partners can just "feel" that they are growing distant emotionally. Where two people once felt close and connected, they now feel like they hardly know each other. Where it was once easy to share emotions, cuddle, and talk about nothing, such interactions now feel forced and "cold". This sort of emotional distance can be a sign of a host of relationship problems, including infidelity. If your girlfriend seems cold and distant, press the issue with her immediately talking with her to learn the root cause is better than languishing in unhappiness. Note, however, that prolonged emotional distance can be a sign of many relationship problems besides infidelity. The National Healthy Marriage Resource Center pinpoints family and cultural differences, situational conflict, and stress as just a few of many alternate causes. Sometimes, people who know they're doing something wrong can become super-sensitive to any sort of criticism or accusation. Because their misdeeds are fresh in their memory, any sort of innocent teasing or nit-picking can seem like a personal attack. If your girlfriend has surprised you recently with unnecessarily hostile responses to seemingly innocent questions, you may have a serious problem on your hands. Below are a few innocent sample questions that can spell trouble if they're met with anger or frustration: "Hey, who was that you were talking to on the phone?" "So, what did you do last weekend? "What are your plans for next Friday?" "How are your friends?" "Who have you seen recently?" In one of the absolute worst-case scenarios for any relationship, one partner may become so enamored with someone else that she actively tries to sabotage the relationship she's already in. This can take the form of aggression, rudeness, frustration, insults, and more. In this case, your girlfriend is most likely trying to get you to break up with her so that she can pursue her new relationship free from guilt. If your relationship gets to this point, sadly, it may be best to give your girlfriend what she wants. The pain of a quick breakup is usually much less than the pain of staying in an unhappy relationship with someone who actively wants to ruin it. Normally, random acts of kindness can provide a spontaneous "spark" for a relationship. However, if one partner has been having serious thoughts about someone else, this sort of kindness may simply make her guilty. Almost no one likes receiving appreciation from someone they know they've wronged, so if your girlfriend seems unhappy to receive a gift or some other sort of show of kindness from you, be on the lookout for other warning signs. Below are a few of the sorts of things that normally go over well, but may not if your girlfriend is seriously thinking about someone else: Gifts for any occasion (especially "just because") Fancy nights out Gourmet meals Surprise appearances at work Clearing your schedule "just for her" Paradoxically, while having feelings for another guy can cause your girlfriend to be unusually defensive or aggressive, it can sometimes cause her to be extremely "nice" or affectionate. If your girlfriend is worried that you may discover her secret, she may temporarily try to woo you by showering you with kisses, hugs, compliments, cuddling, and more. A girlfriend who suddenly seems intent on keeping you dizzy with constant positive attention for no discernible reason may be up to no good, so be wary especially if the affection seems to increase whenever you question her activities or whereabouts. Of course, affection is usually a good thing within the context of a relationship, so don't be suspicious of ordinary, reasonable affection. Getting lots of kisses and a fancy dinner after getting graduating or getting promoted is fantastic, but receiving the same outcome after asking where your girlfriend has been for the past week should be troubling.

SUMMARY:
Feel for emotional distance. Look for extreme defensiveness. Watch out for sudden aggression. See whether she's uncomfortable receiving your kindness. Watch out for unprompted affection.