Problem: This review is like what?

Review:Marvelous cult film from 1979 in which the students of Vince Lombardi High School are confronted with a new, dictatorial principal named Miss Togar (Mary Woronov). Togar is a music hater and blames the musical tastes of the students for their transgressions. Leading the charge against her is fun-loving Riff Randell (P.J. Soles), the #1 Ramones fan who, more than anything, wants the rock group to record her songs.

Now *this* is an impossible movie to resist. First and foremost, the soundtrack is incredible, with songs by such artists as Alice Cooper and the Velvet Underground in addition to the infectious non-stop assortment of Ramones songs. "Teenage Lobotomy", "Sheena is a Punk Rocker", and "Blitzkrieg Bop" are just a few of them. Next, the cast truly gives it their all, with Soles an ideal choice for the role of Riff; she is a true delight. Vincent Van Patten and Dey Young are earnest as Tom and Kate, Woronov is well cast against type as the snooty and disdainful Togar, Clint Howard has one of his best ever parts as washroom-occupying entrepreneur Eaglebauer, and New World regulars such as Dick Miller, Paul Bartel (particularly fun as music teacher Mr. McGree) and The Real Don Steele are fun as always. And, of course, it's a treat to see The Ramones playing themselves.

The movie has true spirit. The energy level is high, with co-story author and director Allan Arkush bringing a great deal of flair to the proceedings. There's also a great sense of humor. The paper airplane gag is a superb example of this. This extends right to the "wipe" style of scene transitions. There are even hilarious giant mice created by future makeup effects notable Rob Bottin, in one of his earliest gigs.

About as good as an authority-defying, defend-one's-right-to-party film can get. "Rock 'n' Roll High School" is, quite simply, a wonderful cult film.

8/10
+++++++++
A: positive

Problem: This review is like what?

Review:This one will get reviews all over the map because it doesn't comfortably fit any mold. It's horror-- but not a splatterfest. It's equal part Suspense as well as Horror-- yet without the usual Hollywood screams and jerky camera.

The feel of the movie is spare and lean with next to no special effects because I think you should listen and watch the faces of the characters.

Forget that Brendan is a graduate of the Buffy universe. That's a red herring. He IS acting here. 'Camp' is a misreading of the tone of this story. Adrienne Barbeau is giving a rock solid performance-- so she must believe the script has something to say. We all know the sorry excuses where the actors plainly don't care anymore and are just waiting for the director to snap "Cut" and get their paychecks. This is Not the case, here.

Forgive the fact that the bodies begin to fall with almost mondo-funny regularity. I don't think the intent was humorous-- but to keep you off balance.

Think of it less of a Horror 'Movie' and more of a Horror 'Play' on a stage-- that decrepit whitewashed house. Then you might see it's really about paranoia, fear, and spiralling madness set in an isolated someplace, USA.

And it is twisty. Time travel, Mind Control, secret experiments and Nazi's who may NOT be dead. . .yet.

I say rent it and give it a try if you're in the mood for something a little cerebral. This would be a good choice for a Saturday Midnight sit down.
+++++++++
A: positive

Problem: This review is like what?

Review:Out of all the Princess stories Disney has put out there, Cinderella probably has the most enduring appeal. I can't really say why, but for some reason, generation after generation thrusts her to the top of their lists. As a little girl, I wanted nothing more than to be Cinderella with her glass slipper- it was my absolute favorite costume.

Honestly, I don't think there is any story that more realizes the longings of the human heart than Cinderella. Who has never wanted to run away from the drudgeries of daily life and find someone who sees you as no one else ever had? The story is older than the English language and somehow it still rings true.

As for the characters, if nothing else, Disney can make a wonderful villain. Lady Tremaine is evil to the T, in a wonderfully calculating, not overtly physical way. Her cutting tongue and eyes do the work for her- she doesn't need staffs of lightening to strike fear into your heart. The animal friends tend to grate, especially that idiotic Gus. I would have cheered had he met his fate in Lucifer's jaws. Cinderella herself was no pushover- making some justly catty remarks at times. However, she just lacked the drive to make her entirely sympathetic. Sure, she was nice and fed animals, but what was keeping her at that place? We never know. Even if she only became a maid in another house, at least she's be getting paid and have a shot at respect. It seems the only reason things work out in the end for Cindy is that everything sort of falls to place in her lap. She never works for her dreams that she sings so fondly of.

Which brings me to the music, which is lovely, as ever. Ilene woods has a lovely, rich voice, probably my favorite of any Disney heroine. Some big standards originated here- A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes, So This is Love, Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo...

Cinderella is a wonderful heartfelt story with a ton of musical highlights. While it is lacking in some character development, it does provide some classic villains and excellent voice work. If you are feeling sick at heart, pop it in- it'll warm you up and make you hum Mmm Mmm Good!

Quote of the film:

-Surprise! Surprise! -Duh duh duh- Happy Birthday!
+++++++++
A: positive

Problem: This review is like what?

Review:Well! What can one say? Firstly, this adaptation is far too long at 4 hours, for the complexity (or lack of such) of the plot. The actors try really hard to make something of this film but there is too little content for the time available. Swayzee is really NOT a Quatermain character at all. After seeing Sean Connery's interpretation of the great man in "The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen", Swayzee really does not make the grade. This chap with the winchester repeating rifle has none of the strength, stature, subtlety, or humour needed for the part, and is upstaged by everyone including the witch doctor, who incidentally seems from my point of view to be more convincing as an actor than the rest of the cast. Some of the vistas are pleasing but there are silly mistakes in the cinematography. For example. When the happy team arrive at the water hole in the middle of the desert, their tracks are visible down to the oasis, just waiting for them to walk in them. Climbing out of the mine leads to an exit (on the next shot) nothing like the exit seen from the passage they have climbed through, et cetera. I was waiting for Doug McClure to appear at any moment. In some ways I wish he had.

The leader of the Russians pursuing Quatermain is a shoddily created stereotypical character who just shoots at everything.

Swayzee does quite well as the sad father, returned to London, who is unable to obtain the custody of his son. Swayzee should stick to that sort of thing. He is not able to carry the part of a courageous gentleman with a stout heart, experience of life, and sense of fair play.

4 out of 10. Barely
+++++++++
A:
negative