INPUT ARTICLE: Article: Everyone enjoys a funny story. But it's hard to elicit laughs from a meandering or vague anecdote. Instead, you should strive to have several crisp, well-worded stories ready to tell at parties and other social events. Think of the most amusing or odd stories from your life. These should be your go-to stories in conversations. Consider the likely audience for your anecdotes. If your goal is to see witty in conversations at an accounting convention, stories related to accounting might be appropriate. However, if you're looking for witty stories you can tell anywhere, using common experiences such as school or parents or pets or children are best, since more people will be able to relate to them. The same basic story can either be confusing, boring, or gut-busting. In order to make sure your story brings the laughs, you'll need to polish it. To get an idea of what makes a story funny, study the humorous phrasing and selective exaggeration employed by autobiographical humorists like David Sedaris. Begin outlining your story. Try to remember details. Revise your anecdote crisp, clear, and humorous. Then work on memorizing and fine-tuning your verbal delivery so that it comes across as funny in person as it does on the page. If other people join the conversation, feel free to make fun of them. Make fun of celebrities, singers or politicians. Just make sure that the other person is not a great fan of the celebrity your choosing to pick on. Don't go over the top. Don't make fun of someone's appearance, family situations, sexuality or disabilities (if any) unless you know it is something they are quite open about. Even then, even though they make self-deprecating jokes, they might not want to hear it from other people. Few things come across as wittier in a conversation than clever wordplay. Even if wordplay doesn't come naturally to you, you can improve with practice. Know your vocabulary. Most wordplay depends on having a wide vocabulary. Consider vocabulary-building books, smartphone apps, and games, like crossword puzzles, to improve your command of words. Know the types of wordplay. Spoonerisms ("It's roaring with pain" instead of "It's pouring with rain"), malapropisms ("dance a flamingo" instead of "dance a flamenco"), puns ("She had a photographic memory but never developed it"), and portmanteaus ("Chrismukkah," a combination of "Christmas" and "Hanukkah") can all be wittily inserted into conversation if used well. Study examples of good wordplay. Everyone from Shakespeare to George Carlin to Kanye West employs wordplay in their writing and performances. Keeping your audience in mind, consume examples of good wordplay to help you understand how to employ it yourself.

SUMMARY: Get anecdotal. Make it funny. Have good banter. Play with words.

INPUT ARTICLE: Article: Rinse your potatoes in cool or cold water to wash away any dirt. Scrub them gently with a soft sponge to clean them. You may have to cut away some green or brown spots. Use a sharp knife or vegetable peeler to carefully slice away the blemishes. If you plan to season the skins, dry potatoes are much better at absorbing seasonings. Do not pierce the skins of the potatoes if you are not wrapping them. Piercing allows the moisture to escape, which will dry out the potato. This will prevent the potatoes from sticking to the grill and create a crispier skin. In a small bowl, mix cooking oil with a small amount of butter, salt, pepper, and garlic for a tasty seasoning spread. Placing your potatoes on skewers makes the grilling process easier. Place 3 to 4 potatoes on each skewer depending on size. You can also place your potatoes directly onto the grill if you prefer. Using indirect heat, place the skewered potatoes on the edge furthest from the direct heat source. Cook over the indirect heat for 30 to 40 minutes with the grill lid down. Gradually roll the potatoes toward the direct heat.

SUMMARY: Wash the potatoes. Prepare each potato. Pat the potatoes dry. Brush the skins with oil. Place potatoes on metal skewers. Put your potatoes on the grill. Cook your potatoes.

INPUT ARTICLE: Article: If you're cleaning blinds in the kitchen, or if you have pets in the house, your blinds may need more than a simple dusting to get clean. Turn the stem to close the blinds. Get the slats flat and straighten them out to expose as much dust and dirt as you can. You might choose to remove the blinds from their setting before cleaning them by hand, but in most cases this won't be necessary. Run a feather duster, dry towel or vacuum with a brush attachment over the slats of the blinds lightly. Remove whatever dust has collected on the surface. Any stuck-on dirt and grime that is left behind will need to be cleaned by hand. White plastic or vinyl blinds are especially bad about showing dirt and discoloration. Combine a small amount of mild dish soap with warm water. Take a microfiber towel or coarse washcloth and soak it in the soapy water solution. Wring out the excess water. The towel should be just slightly damp to help dust stick to it without wetting the blinds. Avoid using abrasive cleaners on blinds, even the synthetic types. Harsh chemicals can eat through the finish of the slats. Wooden blinds, especially, should not get too wet. Standing water can soak into the wood and cause it to warp and discolor. With one hand, take hold of the outer edge of the top blind slat. Pinch the slat damp towel and drag your hand from one end to the other, cleaning the entire length. Repeat this process with each individual slat, moving from top to bottom, left to right. Go over particularly dirty spots as many times as needed. Stop and rinse the towel after every few slats to wash away the dust and grime that has built up on it. You may be surprised how much dirt you'll pick up cleaning this way! Grip the blind slats lightly to keep from bending them out of shape.

SUMMARY:
Close the blinds so that the slats are facing down. Remove as much dust from the blinds as you can. Wet a towel with soap and water. Wipe down the blinds from end to end.