Problem: Raoul Duke: "Bazooko's Circus is what the whole world would be doing Saturday nights if the Nazis had won the war. This was the Sixth Reich." As your attorney, I advise you to take Mr. Duke's advice. And take a hit out of that small jar in my shaving kit.
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A: negative

Problem: Yep... 80's Crazy all the way! Keep the kids at home....
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A: positive

Problem: Complimentary shortbread with my Lapsang Souchong, and service with a genuine smile. I knew the Balmoral Hotel was swish and swoo, and so when stopping into the Bar one evening for a coffee with a friend I knew I would pay a little extra premium. But I have to say I was absolutely delighted by the service, the tea itself, and the surroundings. Whilst The Balmoral Hotel has it's own page and reviews on Yelp (http://www.yelp.co.uk/biz/the-balmoral-hotel-ltd-edinburgh-4), I'm reviewing only the Bar as you can visit it as a normal punter or passer-by, enjoy the drinks and ambience, without the need of staying there. It was a blustery Sunday night, we'd been to the movies and wanted somewhere to rest for an hour or so past 9pm where we didn't have to drink alcomahol. Debating the pros and cons of crossing over the Bridge to get to Starbucks we suddenly realised The Balmoral Bar was sitting right in front of us. As it's part of the hotel and usually is really busy with resident tourists coming and going, it's the sort of place where you can't see the wood for the trees and completely don't even register it. But I'm so glad we did. As I said, my lapsang souchong that I ordered came with complimentary shortbread. It was also served in a delightful tea set, with proper strainer and real tea leaves. This is a minor detail but avid readers of my reviews (humour me here!) may notice that I place high regard on establishments that understand the importance of a well-brewed pot of tea. Bags will do, yes, but loose leaf is where it's at. My friend's hot chocolate smelled absolutely delicious too and had the perfect creamy foam on top. Our waitress was just an absolute delight. Table service, of course, and she genuinely enthused that she hoped we enjoyed it and made wee quips and comments about "not being able to have tea in Scotland without a biscuit" and asked us how our night had been as if she really cared. It made all the difference. A quick glance over the cocktail menu told me I'd need to go back to try them but save up my pennies first - at around 11 a cocktail there again was a premium. If I were ever on a slightly lavish, nice night out for a celebration and dressed up a wee bit, I would certainly head here for some pre / post dinner cocktails and I shall definitely choose the Balmoral over Starbucks again any day for a tea or coffee.
How would this review be described?
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A: positive

Problem: Probably the best thing I ate in Pittsburgh was a sausage sandwich from here. It was so simple and a touch spicy, just perfect. This was the real food I imagined when I planned my trip here. The staff was delightful and excited about their food. It's a total shithole, but in a beautiful way. I love Frankies.
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A:
positive