Problem: What would be an example of an positive review?

Answer: I love this place so much... It's my favorite bar in town. The grilled cheese and fried broccoli is where it's AT, and the drinks are inexpensive. It can be quiet enough to have lots of talking with friends, loud enough to chill by yourself and have some food. One drawback is it's hard to find seating on weekends, but with two rooms and two bars, it just takes a bit of time but not too long, and that happens with any bar in downtown on the weekend.

Problem: What would be an example of an positive review?

Answer: Dear La Piazza al Forno We need to talk. I don't quite know how to say this so I'm just going to come out with it. I've been seeing someone else. How long? About a year now. Am I in love with another? Yes. Was it me? It was. The day you decided to remove hoagies from the lunch menu, about a year ago, I'm sorry, but it really was you...and not me. Hey..wait...put down that pizza peel...try to stay calm...please? [Olive oil container whizzing past head] Please! Stop throwing shit at me...everyone breaks up on social media these days, or haven't you heard. Wow, what a Bitch!

Problem: What would be an example of an negative review?

Answer:
Placed order with Eat24. Took nearly 45 minutes to get my order- got the impression that they didn't even start cooking it until I showed up. Food quality is very mixed- tasty dishes with low-quality ingredients rendering the dishes themselves poor. THAI CHICKEN WINGS appetizer- tasty six-piece order of wings with extra sauce, delicious aroma was a bit better than the actual taste. KANA MHOO KROP (roasted pork stir fried with Chinese broccoli in garlic and oyster sauce)- portion is half the size of other entree ordered, and pork used in this dish is either super dry/old or fatty. Could not eat the protein in this dish. If I wanted just Chinese broccoli, I would have ordered that. I didn't pay $10 for this dish to consist of pork jerky and broccoli. I will say that the sauce was tasty though. PAD SEE EW- ordered this medium heat with beef and it was a huge step up from mild and the protein was also tough in this dish. Overall it wasn't bad though. TOM KHA- soup was delicious! Pleasant surprise. Good size portion, good complexity of flavor, plentiful tomato and mushrooms. Unfortunately, also plentiful chunks of ginger, comparable in size to the pieces of chicken. Tasty though! Service was polite but very slow. Placed order, waited 15 minutes to leave, arrived around 25 minutes after placing order. Waited an additional half hour. No other patrons were present. Order also asked for an additional cup of oyster sauce on the side, but they were unable to do so, saying that they didn't have packets of this condiment. I asked if it could be put in a small plastic cup, they said they couldn't do that because they have the oyster sauce in a huge gallon-size container in the back, and they would have to open the container in order to get me some. I'm baffled as to how on earth they managed to get the sauce into my dish but are completely unable to put it in a cup. Food quality was such that it seemed a great recipe was being used for these dishes- someone clearly knows their business with this cuisine. However, the cook is either limited to low-quality ingredients or simply does not care, because the actual execution is lackluster.