In this task, you must classify if a given review is positive/negative, indicating your answer as P or N.

i am a steven seagal fan .
i only say this now because " mufti splenetik " is n't my real name and because i probably need to explain why i went into this film expecting great things .
any proud seagal fan worth his beans will tell you that the seagal formula is something you can depend on .
seagal films can always be counted on for minimal dialogue , heaps of expendable baddies with extemely crunchable bones ( which we 'll always hear when seagal does his limb - twisting thing ) , rarely a female co - lead in sight ( unless it 's a real - life model - wife who has n't worked since weird science ) and , usually the worst possible titles you can imagine .
not to mention very straightforward plots , generally all - round bad dialogue and mr implacable leather - face himself in that same black outfit he 's been in since nico doing his " my hands are sharp , nimble knives " thing , seagal the stoic , sir petrified ponytail , duke of dull .
in the glimmer man , seagal breaks out of this formula : he gets a * sidekick *
, attempts to banter , and puts on a new vest .
he 's also put on quite a lot of weight .
small potatoes , you may say , a man should be able to accessorize and banter if he wants to , but damnit , if it ai n't broke , why fix it ?
( more on this disappointed person 's dashed expectations later ) .
as jack cole , seagal is a homicide detective with a questionable past .
while he and his partner ( played by keenen ivory wayans ) are investigating a series of ritual killings , cole himself becomes a suspect , especially when a background check run by campbell reveals practically nothing on cole .
it turns out that cole is a former trained government assassin ( you just ca n't trust these homicide detectives ) , someone whom victims used to catch just a glimpse of in the jungle before he pounced on them , and hence , well , you know , that " glimmer man " thing .
an increasingly fishy homicide investigation in the present soon leads to the gradual uncovering of a larger , more threatening conspiracy that involves a crooked businessman ( bob gunton ) , cole 's former cia boss ( brian cox ) and deals involving chemical weapons .
the glimmer man plot is pretty standard stuff , drawing ( as with his other films ) elements from the hotter films of the year ( eg , se7en ) .
it 's the other changes that disappoint .
for example , although there 's a fair amount of violence in this movie , there 's also the disastrous pairing of seagal with keenen ivory wayans , probably the best known of the wayans tribe ( how many are there , exactly ? ) from television 's " in living colour .
" wayans plays whiney straightman to seagal 's bead - adorned and brocade - draped cole , keeping up his " are you crazy " part of the dialogue with wasted zest .
as campbell , wayans confines himself to bemoaning his new partner 's eccentric habits , but the chemistry between the two is minimal , and seagal 's wooden comebacks make for painful watching .
a cook in under seige 2 , seagal is now a buddhist who speaks chinese and wears prayer beads and intricate silk jackets over his normal black ensemble .
he chants , refuses to fight unless truly provoked and introduces campbell to powdered deer penis to cure his allergies .
again , a benign ( if trite ) plot device except for the fact that these new character traits require seagal to speak more than usual .
heck , he has to deliver punchlines and carry a steady conversation with someone other than himself for a large part of the film .
is that a lot to ask of the seague ? too much .
seagal 's best characteristic used to be that he knew his purpose in this already complicated world of movies : to crunchily snap off bad guy appendages , and to do it silently , and alone .
not for seagal , the snappy one - liners of arnold and stallone , nor the attempts to show that he can act , much less think .
no kindergarten cop , no oscar , just simple , unadulterated deathblows .
that 's really how it must have started : like - minded fans who knew what they wanted streamed in to watch the seague do his thing , knowing that never in the seagal universe would they ever have to see him do anything else .
we trusted him .
we got to know him .
now , betrayal .
i do n't know if i can watch another seagal movie without that little niggling doubt that he 's going to try to be funny again .
i 'll try , but it wo n't be easy .
if you have n't watched the glimmer man yet ,
you might want to wait for the video to come out .
it 's easier to just fast forward the dialogue parts and linger on the action sequences .
after all , if we ca n't depend on our fantasies , what can we depend on ?
the flying inkpot rating system :
* wait for the tv2 broadcast .
*
* a little creaky , but still better than staying at home with gotcha !
*
* * pretty good , bring a friend .
*
*
* * amazing , potent stuff .
*
*
*
* * perfection .
see it twice .
mufti spelenetik is still a steven seagal fan .
everybody makes mistakes once in awhile .
N

one of these days , i 'll make good on my promise never to rent another abel ferrara movie .
king of new york and body snatchers notwithstanding ( and
bad lieutenant is only fit for a single , emotive viewing ) ,
his exploitation flicks have fallen into a rut of hoary art - house trappings .
it 's a perfume - drenched , coke - addled visit to the seedy pornography shop , where beautiful models ( no , hookers -- no , courtesans ) usher you through the silk curtains .
ferrara 's only consistently smart move has been casting
christopher walken over and over again , since walken can make a good movie great and a loathsome movie durable whenever he 's onscreen .
his 8-minute scene in the addiction is the saving grace of that otherwise abysmal , unwatchable , and pretentious failure .
when he starts talking about his vampiric bowel movements , or questions whether lili taylor has ever read naked lunch , there 's a much - needed dose of humor in an otherwise terminally unfunny affair .
you know those gothic club kids who are too cool to smile and let you know they 're actually having fun ?
the addiction is that movie .
walken , sadly , does not appear in the blackout .
the central role of matty , a junkie film star whose lightning paced hollywood life among the beautiful people is inevitably leading to his destruction , is played by matthew modine ( who takes what he can get after cutthroat island ) .
much like the protagonists of michelangelo antonioni 's terminally bored cultural elite , matty is involved in a bitter pill " relationship " with high fashioned model annie ( at least i think she 's a model . )
matty 's lady is played by french actress b ? atrice dalle , arrested twice for cocaine possession during filming of the blackout -- not that you needed to know that , but it lends credence to the idea that ferrara 's entire oeuvre has been filmed in a fucking blackout .
no kidding .
requiem for a dream has nothing on the junkie presentations seen in ferrara 's movies and his controversial urban lifestyle .
matty and annie struggle over her decision to have an abortion without consulting him .
no doubt , he was off chasing the dragon .
in his despair , matty indulges in a chemical induced weekend of debauchery , tooling around the streets of miami with video filmmaker mickey wayne ( dennis hopper , in full " dirty ol' man " mold smacking models on the ass and telling them to spread their legs .
wider ! )
toward the end of the night , they pick up a teenage waitress also named annie ( sarah lassez ) , start shooting a hastily improvised sexual scene , then matty thankfully blacks out .
something happened that night which haunts him throughout the rest of the movie , and it 's exactly what you think it was .
suffice to say , there 's some confusion over whether he killed annie one or annie two , or anyone at all .
the blackout is typical ferrara :
no plot to speak of , plenty of raunch , and horribly vogue images of matthew modine downing a bottle of jack daniels and a beer while wrapping himself in a see - through curtain in his hotel room by the sea , by the sea , by the beautiful sea .
cinematographer ken kelsch finds inconsistent glory in alternating gorgeous painterly sunsets with docu - style sleaze ( and we 're back to dennis hopper leering at girls in bathing suits .
"
yeah ! ! !
yeah ! ! !
arrrghhh ! " says mr .
hopper .
dirty old sod . )
it 's compulsive viewing in a tacky sort of way , leading to a ridiculous climax where modine seizes control of his destiny .
how 's that for cryptic ?
never fear -- ferrara finds time for some female full frontal nudity to remind us what he 's all about .
i can picture it now .
" take off yer clothes , kid -- it 's essential to depict the inner maelstrom of my central protagonist , and you 're his visual
i
d .
you 're the soul , the heart , the bloodstream of the picture .
take it off !
take it all off ! ! !
ha ha ha !
" friggin ' vampire .
yeah , you , ferrara .
a final word about matthew modine : he 's actually a fine actor when properly cast , but there 's something too squeaky - clean in his demeanor .
he 's ideally suited for sarcastic men in tightly controlled situations , such as his private joker in full metal jacket or the time - bomb nebbish in short cuts ( who is every bit as superb as julianne moore in that famous scene , though no one seems to notice him ) .
[ he was in that scene ?
-ed . ]
here , he 's asked to let it all hang out , sporting a three - day stubble and oily bangs .
he throws around furniture like stanley kowalski , but it 's somehow lacking .
modine lacks the feral intensity of brando , entirely miscast in ferrara 's flesh fair .
better luck next time
, matt .
someday , you 'll be forgiven for cutthroat island , which was n't really your fault in the first place .
maybe atom egoyan will find a place for you somewhere , and all will once again be well in your world .
N

not since 1996 's shine , which starred geoffrey rush as pianist david helfgott , has a movie so defiantly laid bare the lives of world - class musicians .
in fact , if one were to watch these films together , it would almost certainly stand as a convincing argument that a life of music naturally leads to all varieties of social ills .
yet hilary and jackie , the sophomore effort from director anand tucker , has something more to say -- it softly but strongly explores the complex relationships of sibling rivalry and love in a very compelling tale .
emily watson and rachel griffiths are the leads in this tale , playing the sisters du pr ? .
both musicians from childhood , hilary ( griffiths ) is renowned flutist while jacqueline ( watson ) is easily as skilled on the cello .
the two comepete for and win many honors as children and as young women , both together and seperate .
their careers as musicians surpass and then bow to one another 's , and although their lives take very different paths -- hilary settles down to marriage and a family while rachel skips across the globe on a world concert tour -- they are bound together by their deep family love .
the performances of watson and griffiths are excellent in style and substance .
they contrast each other wonderfully , and
while watson 's portrayal of jackie du pr ? is at times eccentric and perhaps unsympathetic , both characters are charged with emotion .
the frank cottrell boyce script , which is based on the book by hilary and piers
du pr ?
, brings a great deal of depth to these characters as well .
the script is also to be commended for its well - polished dual nature .
cottrell boyce adopts a style which one might expect to see in a mystery thriller ( which was in fact the case with david koepp and robert towne 's script for mission : impossible ) and skillfully molds it to the story of two rising musicians on different courses to fame .
the latter parts of his script are controversial to say the least , and the rather depressing ending takes the wind out of an envigorating story .
some will leave this movie feeling disenfranchised .
nevertheless , hilary and jackie is a movie that reaches an upper echelon of contemporary cinema through solid fundamentals and is a decent watch all around .
P