An example of a movie review. negative.

A: There's been a vogue for the past few years for often-as-not ironic zombie-related films, as well as other media incarnations of the flesh- eating resurrected dead. "Fido" is a film that's either an attempt to cash in on that, simply a manifestation of it, or both -- and it falls squarely into the category of ironic zombies. The joke here is that we get to see the walking dead in the contrasting context of a broadly stereotyped, squeaky-clean, alternate-history (we are in the wake of a great Zombie War, and the creatures are now being domesticated as slaves) version of a 1950s suburb.

It's a moderately funny concept on its own, and enough perhaps for a five-minute comedy sketch, but it can't hold up a feature-film on its own. The joke that rotting corpses for servants are incongruous with this idealized version of a small town is repeated over and over again, and loses all effectiveness. The soundtrack relentlessly plays sunny tunes while zombies cannibalize bystanders. The word "zombie" is constantly inserted into an otherwise familiarly homey line for a cheap attempt at a laugh.

The very broadness and artificiality of the representation of "the nineteen fifties" here can't help but irritate me. It is so stylized, in it evidently "Pleasantville-"inspired way, that it is more apparent in waving markers of its 1950s-ness around than actually bearing any resemblance to anything that might have happened between 1950 and 1959. There is something obnoxiously sneering about it, as if the film is bragging emptily and thoughtlessly about how more open, down-to-Earth, and superior the 2000s are.

Because the characters are such broad representations of pop-culture 1950s "types," it's difficult to develop much emotional investment in them. Each has a few character traits thrown at him or her -- Helen is obsessed with appearances, and Bill loves golf and his haunted by having had to kill his father -- but they remain quite two-dimensional. Performances within the constraints of this bad writing are fine. The best is Billy Connolly as Fido the zombie, who in the tradition of Boris Karloff in "Frankenstein" actually imparts character and sympathy to a lumbering green monster who cannot speak.

There are little bits of unsubtle allegory thrown around -- to commodity fetishism, racism, classism, war paranoia, et cetera, but none of it really works on a comprehensive level, and the filmmakers don;t really stick with anything.

Unfortunately, this film doesn't really get past sticking with the flimsy joke of "Look! Zombies in 'Leave it to Beaver!'" for a good hour- and-a-half.

An example of a movie review. positive.

A: Emilio Miraglio's "The Red Queen Kills Seven Times" (1972) is just about the most perfect example of a giallo that I have ever seen, mixing all the requisite elements into one sinister stew indeed. First of all, and of paramount importance for me, it has a complex, twisty plot that ultimately makes perfect sense, and the killer here does not come completely out of left field at the end. The story, concerning a series of gruesome murders (you already know how many from the film's title, right?) that takes place in seeming fulfillment of an ancient prophecy concerning two sisters, is an involving one, and the murderer, a red-cloaked figure with the insane laugh of a madwoman, is both frightening and memorable. Every great giallo requires some lovely lead actresses, and here we have quite an assortment, headed by the ridiculously beautiful Barbara Bouchet as one of the two sisters and, in one of her earlier roles, Sybil Danning, as a lustful tramp at Barbara's fashion house. Another necessary ingredient of a superior giallo is a catchy, hummable score, and Bruno Nicolai provides one for this film that should stay with you for days. Gorgeous scenery? Check again. Filmed largely in Wurzburg, Germany, the picture is a treat for the eye indeed. OK, OK, but what about those murders? After all, isn't that what gialli are all about? Well, I'm pleased to report that most viewers should be well satisfied with the various knifings, shootings, impalements and other carnage that this film tastefully dishes out...not to mention the crypts, freaky dream sequence, rats and bats (and LOTS of 'em, too!), the drug references, a rape scene, the obligatory red herrings and, in the person of Ugo Pagliai, a hunky leading man for the female viewers. As I said, a perfect giallo. And even better, this DVD is from the fine folks at No Shame, and you know what that means: a gorgeous print and loads of extras, to boot! Thanks, guys!

An example of a movie review. negative.

A:
I figured the whole joke of the movie would be to see some rich white guy acting like Chris Rock, and then see Chris Rock react to people's reactions. Instead you just see Chris Rock being himself and people not understanding him. There are maybe 2 scenes in the entire movie where they use their gimmick. This should have been a lot better.