Problem: What would be an example of an negative review?

Answer: This bar used to be really popular with the tatted up, pierced set. Good times. The crowd was mainly regulars, the drinks were cheap. This was my home away from home for a while. Then the bartenders started to ban people left and right. Then people got barred for stating out loud that they were going to the bar next door to hang out with their barred friends. Or for stating that they were going to catch a band next door. Or for, you know, breathing wrong. It got so bad Slacker started selling Barred from Dee's tee shirts, but the owner of Dee's put a stop to that. The guy clearly has no sense of humor. Or any sense as to how to run a successful business. I haven't been back in years and don't plan to. Yeah it's got a cool layout and the younger bartender who worked upstairs was an absolute peach, but in general this place left me with a sour taste in my mouth and a fear of being barred for no reason. The Smiling Moose a few doors down welcomed the mass exodus from this place with open arms and while I no longer drink on the South Side, I will always be grateful that my friends and I, barred from Dee's Cafe or not, still had someplace fun to drink.

Problem: What would be an example of an negative review?

Answer: This review is based on a recent stay at the "Laurel Collection" rooms in the Octavius Tower. Short answer is: don't. I visited during a busy weekend and was happy to get several emails asking me to check-in online so they could be ready for me when I showed up. They also mentioned that I could use the VIP Porte Cochere on Flamingo Ave instead of the main on-strip entrance. So, after battling the hideous strip traffic, I went right by the main entrance, which was a zoo, and zipped into the VIP entrance only to see two signs: one said "Laurel Collection." The other said "Valet Full: Seven Stars and Diamond Only." When I asked the valet what to do the Valet Full sign won -- I was Laurel Collection, but not Seven Stars or Diamond -- he rejected me and offered lame directions to get back to the main entrance -- which I did some 30 minutes later. I was livid. Think about this: I was at the main entrance, I drove by it because they said I could use the VIP side entrance, and then they wouldn't let me. So I had to cross Interstate 15, come back up Flamingo, sit through numerous light cycles, finally make the left onto the Strip, and then fight to make the left turn into Caesar's ... all in all taking me to self-parking -- the farthest possible spot from the Porte Cochere -- which, by the way, was itself jammed. On arriving I told them this tale, and a manager named Andrew offered to put a $50 food and beverage credit on my bill. After I left, I noticed that they couldn't even get that right -- no such credit was applied. F**k you very much. Empty promises squared. All that aside, Caeser's is simply too big for its own good and unless you are Diamond or Seven Stars you will most likely find yourself -- even in the Laurel Collection -- treated as a 2nd or 3rd-class citizen. By the way, I think "Laurel Collection" is Greek for "far from everything." The rooms are nice, but far from the center of the action so think "more walking" which is just the thing that everyone wants to do in Vegas. The other amazing BS was that my room was on the "61st floor" in a building that maybe had 40 floors.

Problem: What would be an example of an positive review?

Answer:
I've been to Clean Freak 3 times in the last week. Got all 3 of our vehicles washed. First wash I got the $12 wash for the SUV. I ended up getting a free $5 wash. So when you think about it....that's 2 washes for $12 (1 premium wash and 1 basic...not too shabby if you ask me). I took J's car to get washed with the free wash Tuesday and then took my 16 year old truck for a $5 wash last night. The old boy looked great after wards! I have to admit, I like this wash better than the one around the corner, though they towel dry your vehicle. I'd rather come to Clean Freak just for the pure fact that for the same price, you can get to vacuum out your vehicle, can air blast off excess water (which there will after going through the dryers), and you get a detail towel to wipe down your dash. Bring a towel with you to dry off your vehicle when you're in the vacuum area. Seriously considering getting the monthly pass, because I cant help but hold my head up a little higher driving a nice clean vehicle! :)