Problem: Write a negative movie review.

Answer: This is probably the best horror film made since Ed Wood died.

I can't spoil the ending, because I have absolutely no idea what happened. I'll try my best, though. There are some kind of lesbian vampires, but they keep swapping bodies, so any character might or might not be the character you're supposed to think it is, or it might be a lesbian vampire.

Sound confusing? It's not as confusing as you might think, since none of the characters make any sense to begin with. There's no plot, no character development, and random people show up, speak a few lines, and then disappear, never to be heard from again. There are also zombies, who are *possibly* the enemies of the vampires, but there's also a dream-within-a-dream kind of sequence in a mental hospital, so maybe none of this actually happened, and it's all the main character's hallucination.

The upside? Both of the lead girls take their shirts off briefly. The special effects are simply mind-boggling (I particularly liked the incredibly slow, awkward fight sequences). Everyone has a really silly Canadian accent, which adds to the general level of hilarity.

Well worth the price of rental. We laughed until we cried.

Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer: This early version of the tale 'The Student of Prague' was made in Germany in 1913, starring Paul Wegener (who was also in 'The Golem' a few years later). In this film he plays a dual role (technically impressive for a 95 year old film to see them in the same shot) after meeting a mysterious old man who makes a pact with him for gold - the gold he needs to woo a countess he's previously saved from drowning.

Moving at a fast pace (the film runs just over an hour) and fairly well written and characterised, 'The Student of Prague' has echoes of the Faust legend as well as Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, starting as it does with a pact with a mysterious figure of potential evil, and developing into good and evil sides of the same person.

Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer: This movie is well done on so many levels that I am in awe that the score is as low as it is (5.9/10(576 votes) as of this writing). This movie has incredible special effects, a true epic storyline, complex great character interaction, and mind-blowing battles - they have to be seen to be believed! The only complaint I have is the subtitles on the HK DVD version I got (some lines were not translated - ???).

I just don't understand when I read & hear from various sources: "it has a confusing plot....", "I couldn't follow the story...." or "Characters came from nowhere...". From the very 1st time I watched this movie, I understood it, followed it, knew why characters were there, and I absolutely loved it! I've watched it about 8 times already and each time it is pure enjoyment. Oh, and this is not just my opinion, because I've shown this movie to many fellow Americans (people who have never seen an HK film before) who feel the same way. Not one of them failed to follow the storyline and each person declared their love for this movie. Oh man, why can't we have stuff like this coming out of Hollywood? At least Lord of the Rings had a nice marriage of special effects, character development, and storyline.

This is not coming from a Asian film lover newbie either. I own an extensive library of Asian films and I must say that this movie is one of my greatest DVDs. When you watch it you will be blown away by the amazing special effects and epic feel of this movie. You will be drawn into this fantasy world and you won't want to leave! I've seen both the 1983 version and the 2001 (both done by Tsui Hark), and the 2001 is far better in comparison IMO.

Besides the subtitles, I have one additional complaint about this movie: I didn't want it to end.... I'm begging you Mr. Hark - can we please have a sequel?

Problem: Write a negative movie review.

Answer:
I'm only rating this film as a 3 out of pity because it attempts to be worthwhile. I love to praise a great movie and I'm not biased toward "male" movies. Legally blonde was an excellent film. Georgia Rule on the other hand, was a disorganized, weak, poorly written, unrealistic example of movie making at its worst. by the end of the film I didn't care who was lying or if anything was resolved.

The most important thing in a film is a good STORY. This story is weak and never develops (just because the subject matter is deep, doesn't mean the story is good). A good story has dynamic characters. A dynamic character is one that experiences a major character change, and is primed for that change over the course of the movie. In Georgia Rule, the character changes were abrupt and undeveloped. Secondly, there were too many ATTEMPTED dynamic characters. Pulling off a really good dynamic character is a tough job and takes time (you've only got a couple hours in a movie). That means that too many attempted dynamic characters will get too little attention to their personal change. Even if I ignore the poorly written story, and the litter of weak dynamic characters, I can't even say I liked anyone. Every character was a mess. That's fine if your're writing American Beauty but not when you're attempting a dramatic comedy. Georgia was a horrible mother, her daughter was a horrible mother and daughter, and Lohan was a horrible excuse for a human being (no I'm not cutting her any slack because she was molested, crap happens to everyone and we're all responsible for our own actions). The "Dudley Do Right" Mormon kid should have had the guts not to compromise his religion and commitments...and Simon, I mean seriously, what kind of guy lets a 17 year old girl who's been molested just stay over occasionally (unless he's an actor or a politician). This movie is worth watching if you want to remind yourself what good movie making is NOT!