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Take an interest in other people's hobbies and interests. When they see that you like them, they will like you in return. Humans are funny creatures -- once in a while they may sense! If someone walks in the room and you immediately light up and smile, they'll recognize it. How awesome would it feel to be received like that? You're capable of giving everyone warm, fuzzy feelings just be seeming genuinely interested in them because you just plain ol' like them. It's not making yourself vulnerable; it's being real. . Be kind. Whatever you say, mean it. Don't mess with people, don't get caught up in lies or manipulation. When it comes down to it, you should treat others like you want to be treated. If you wanna get your foot in the door anywhere, being sincere and warm will do it. Start by being as patient and polite as you can with people. Listen and try to help if you can. Do things for people because you want to, not to get something back. No matter how much of a bad mood you're in, be as nice as you can to people. Remembering to be kind and sincere when you're not feeling like it can actually turn your mood around. Most everyone loves talking about themselves. They love people who want to listen to them talk about themselves. Unfortunately, there are people in this world who are just waiting to pipe in with something that can steer the conversation in their direction. Take advantage of this by getting them talking! Ask them something about themselves and let them run wild. Let's say you walk up to your coworker at work and you great home by name and say, "How was your weekend?". and he replies with a simple, "Good, good. Got to spend some time with the fam." Instead of saying, "Oh, that must've been nice," keep it open-ended. Respond with, "Oh, do you not get to see them much?" Soon he'll be relaying you with the moving patterns of his second cousins. As long as you seem interested he'll keep going! This one is a toughie -- if you do it too seriously, people may be confused as to whether you're being funny or if you just genuinely hate yourself. If you do it with a smile and a laugh though, you'll be safe. When Conan O'Brien quipped about Michael Phelps being "out of shape," he added, "If he's out of shape, I've been dead for five years." Showing you're lighthearted and willing to poke fun of yourself is an incredibly endearing quality. Being able to take a joke is a very useful quality. When people get to know each other, there's a level of crap-giving that builds solidarity and allows for bonding. If you can do this for other people, it shows that you're fun, flexible, and comfortable with yourself. Use other kinds of humor too! It's all good. If you can use the kind that unites the group, even better. Getting people on the same level allows them to feel more at ease around you. So make 'em laugh! . Everyone likes being flirted with. It just feels good. It's playful and makes us feel like someone is paying attention to us because we're attractive. What's not to like about that situation? What we enjoy less is flirting with someone who doesn't show us they're receptive to it. So do the initial deed and start flirting. You'll show them you're personable, open, and playful. Awesome. Touching a person can create an immediate bond. Think of someone saying hi to you, giving you a wave, and passing by. Now think of someone saying hi, brushing you affectionately across the shoulder, and passing by (probably smiling and making eye contact, too). Which person do you feel more connected with? This doesn't have to be some grand gesture. In fact, it shouldn't be. The smaller things often speak volumes. So go ahead, get a little personal. Let them know you're interested in them as a person and they'll likely return the favor. Use the person you're talking to's name. Work it in. Per Dale Carnegie, it's the sweetest sound to any person. And if you've just met them, it'll help you remember it! Remember details. Did your boss mention his daughter's cookie sale randomly and in passing last week? Ask him how it's going. You may or may not have a sweet tooth that needs squelching. Sometimes insecure people try to make up for their low self-worth by coming off as really self-absorbed. They think they're coming off as awesome when they're really just coming off as selfish. They should really be doing the opposite -- putting the focus on the other person. They'd be more comfortable and be more well-received! When people compliment you, just say "Thank you." If you find an opportunity to talk about how great you are, let the moment pass. People don't have to know how many awards you've won or how many names you can drop or how many things you've seen and done. Those will come out naturally in conversation. You don't need to insert them. . This one barely needs explaining. Happiness and positivity is contagious. People like happy people. If you have a positive spin on something, it's refreshing. While it's tempting to want to appear modest by beating yourself down or to try to appear intellectual by hating everything (we all know that person), don't do it. It's no good for you, your wrinkles, or the people around you. That being said (you knew there was a caveat, didn't you?), know when to commiserate. Complaining is a tool that can drive people together. Just make sure you don't do it all the time! Did your boss just take away casual Friday and insist everyone work late? Appropriate. Did Sheila just take the last donut? Not appropriate. Again, pick your battles. There is no conversation on the entire planet that is or should be infinitely long. None. Zero. Zilch. Nada. And some should be shorter than others. When you sense yours dying down, let it. Tell the person how interesting the conversation was (unless it was terrible; in which case, why are you wasting your time on this person?) and tell them you'll talk soon. Boom. Done. If it's getting awkward, politely excuse yourself. A simple, "Well, I have to get going. I'll see you later!" is not something to be questioned. And don't think it's just you: Awkward conversations make up 17% of all conversations. Maybe. There will be science on it eventually. Probably.
Genuinely like other people. Be sincere Get them talking. Use self-deprecating humor. Flirt and flatter Make them feel special. Don't make it all about you. Be positive Know when to end the conversation.