Input: .
Generate a negative review for a place
Output: We have been coming to Vito's for several years - like everyone else, we can't get enough of their deep dish pizza! - and never have had any complaints. Today, we ordered a deep dish pie for pickup and did not check the box until we got home.. Only to find that it was a thin crust! We live within 10 minutes of the place and called to see if they had given us the wrong pizza accidentally. I thought we could simply go back and get the correct one, or they could bring it to us, since we live in delivery distance. The girl - who took the order, rang me out, and answered this phone call - simply gave a very insincere apology with no plan to offer to fix the problem; after a minute of impasse I asked in a very sarcastic manner if we should just keep the pizza.. To which she replied yes!! We did, and it was delicious, but that's just not good customer service! I am very sad to say that we will have to find a new favorite pizza place :(

Input: .
Generate a negative review for a place
Output: Facts: 1.) I ordered a round of Irish Car Bombs. The bartender proceeded to prepare our drinks by pouring the requisite half-pint of Guinness, and then fisted the bottles of knock-off Jameson and Baileys in one hand and squirted the liquors directly into the beer. "I thought you were going to put the liquors in a shot glass for us!", I commented. "We're out of shot glasses," she replied, "what's the difference anyway?" The smart thing for me to have done would have been to slug the curdling mess down as soon as possible instead of arguing with the fake-tittied bimbo behind the bar. 2.) Outside of the gym, I have never seen so many bro-heims in cutoff shirts, basketball shorts, and backwards hats. In fact, there were more of these at the bar than there were females of any type. One of the more interesting patrons was a 60 year old drunk who bought me Yuengling at closing time. He even followed my friends home from the bar! (*yikes*) 3.) I thought, in April of 2010, I would be at a point where I'd never have to hear the god damn Cha Cha Slide by D.J. Casper again. ("Two hops this time! Hands on your knees!"). I was so, so wrong.

Input: .
Generate a negative review for a place
Output: This place is well positioned coming out of the Caesars casino onto the mall, but all else is average. Appetizers were small and two of them barely stemmed hunger for a party of five. The food was really average for what you might expect. I had the lasagna and it seemed like it had been re-warmed and sitting on the plate for a while. Obviously microwaved at the last minute. All other meals were just OK. I expected better for the price. Keep walking.

Input: .
Generate a positive review for a place
Output:
Great food, wonderful ambiance and our waitress Marlane I believe her name was, was wonderful!! She made this a 5 star experience. =) Super Happy.