Summarize the following:
Before you can ask for help caring for a loved one, you need to figure out where others can plug in. Take some time to list everything that needs to be done to care for your loved one. Try not to leave anything out. After you make the list, think carefully about what you can realistically do on your own without burning out. Now, look at what others could do to take the burden off of you. Remember that you cannot do it all. It is okay to ask for help. Most of the time, people want to help in whatever way they can. However, they may need help figuring out what you and your loved one need. Talk to each person (friends and family) individually to help get your needs covered. You could say, "I know you care about Jane. I was wondering if you'd be able to help out a bit. I could really use someone to bring dinner some nights." Try to offer a task to the person that fits with their skills. Alternatively, ask them what they'd like to do to help, especially if they offer. If your loved one has a long-term serious illness, professional help is often needed. Respite care is a great option for getting help and giving yourself a break from time to time. Maybe your loved one needs to be in a long-term care facility or spend time at an adult daycare a few days per week that has the capability of providing care for your loved one. Maybe you will keep your loved one at home, but you'll need to hire help to come over and provide some care for your loved one. Either way, having a professional around can help take some of the burden off of you. Some communities offer volunteer respite care workers who can come and care for your loved one for a few hours so that you can take a break. You can learn more about respite care for older adults through your local Area Agency on Aging. When considering professional help, you may need to do some persuading when it comes to your loved one. That is, some people don't like the idea of having outside help. However, most people will concede when they realize that you can't do everything yourself. If your loved one is particularly against the idea, you may need to have someone who's been in the same situation (as a caregiver or a professional) come talk to the person. When deciding who to hire, first look at the kind of care you need help with. For instance, you may need non-medical assistance, to provide things like bathroom assistance and even things like cooking and cleaning. Medical care, such as home healthcare, helps with things like providing medications and need to be ordered by a doctor. Some in-home health may be covered by programs like Medicare. Make sure you ask what your insurance covers when looking for professional help. If your loved one is suffering from a terminal illness, hospice may be a good option for you, which can provide care for your loved one, if he or she has 6 months or less to live. Many community services provide some type of care for people who are ill, particularly if they are ill or homebound. For instance, many communities have meal delivery services, such as Meals-On-Wheels, at no cost to the person to help you feed them. Also, consider organizations the person is associated with. For instance, veterans may be entitled to some benefits. Members of Elk and Mason lodges may have some care provided. Also, church members are often willing to step up when members need care. Don't be afraid to look at all your resources. That is, consider which tasks you could find ways of not doing yourself, such as ordering meals in or hiring a cleaning service. These services wouldn't require people coming in as much as professional caregiving help, but they would help relieve some of the pressure on you.
Figure out what your loved one needs. Ask people for help. Get professional help. Look at free options for care. Put your energy into the most essential tasks.