Article: In other words, think about whatever you think he is using you for, and get rid of it completely. Then, observe his reaction. In a healthy relationship, there should be several things that make your partner feel happy and fulfilled. If the relationship suffers greatly because of one change, this might be a problem. If he only wants to hang out in the bedroom at night, tell him you'd rather start going out during the daytime. When he initiates physical intimacy, remind him that you aren't interested right now. Ask him to respect your boundaries. If you aren't sure what to say to him, say, "I want to focus on our emotional connection, so let's hold off on the physical stuff for now." His reaction will let you know if he's using you or not. If he cares about furthering the relationship without sex, he will stick around. If he doesn't want to be with you if he isn't getting the physical intimacy he wants, ditch him. Remember, it is your body. The most important thing is that when you say "No," your boyfriend respects that. Tell him that you don't feel comfortable spending money anymore, and give an excuse if you need to. It's completely understandable if your boyfriend doesn't have the money to spoil you, but it's not OK if he demands that you spoil him. If the interest is gone when your money is gone, that's bad. Tell your boyfriend, "I really need to start saving my money, so I am going to cut back my spending a lot." Then, if he asks you for money or to pay for something, you can remind him of this. Again, his reaction will tell you what you need to know. The same approach can be taken with any other thing your boyfriend might be using you for, such as popularity, gifts, etc. It may seem tough at first, but a quality boyfriend will stick it out if he thinks the relationship is worth it. When you feel like you're blissfully in love, you may not notice if your boyfriend isn't doing anything for you. It's easy to be so infatuated with someone that you make excuses for them. However, start paying attention to the things he does, or doesn't do, for you. This doesn't necessarily mean bouquets of roses and fancy dinners this just means basic ways of showing he cares. For example, does he make any simple, yet meaningful gestures, such as bringing you a coffee when he knows you are tired or sending you an encouraging text message when he knows you are having a bad day? If he tells you he loves your sense of humor and wants to listen to your problems, he probably genuinely cares. If he raves about your beauty right before asking for a favor, watch out. Take special note of the things he does when he gets no benefit in return. If he does nice things simply to make you feel good, that's a great sign. You don't have to make a big announcement to your boyfriend that you need a "break," but find a way to get away for a little bit. It can be easy to accept bad behavior or ignore warning signs when you are in the presence of your boyfriend. Whether you're blinded by love or intimidated by the thought of refusing him something, you may not be able to think clearly when you're with him. When you're away from him, reflect on the relationship. Are you getting from him the same amount that you give to him? Healthy relationships are mutually beneficial. By giving him space, you also will be able to see how he does on his own, without whatever he might be using you for.
What is a summary of what this article is about?
Stop giving him what you think he wants. Tell your boyfriend you want to cool off for a bit if you think he's using you for sex or other physical affection. Protect your money if you think that's what your boyfriend wants. Notice the things he does for you. Recognize the difference between sweet compliments and flattery. Take some time to be alone.