Article: It can be a great emotional burden on a couple that has just had a miscarriage to have to inform everyone of their loss. If you know your friend had made her pregnancy known to people, you can offer to let people know about their loss and save them that terrible experience. Of course, you shouldn't tell people unless she wants you to and you shouldn't "out" her if people didn't know that she was pregnant to begin with. Only discuss this situation with people if she allows it. It might be helpful to ask the couple for a list of people that they want to be sure know. You may have to use your judgement on telling anyone beyond the list. Another additional way to help is to give an article like this or an informational pamphlet to the other people you tell. That way, they'll also know the best ways to help and talk to your friends in their time of grief. You've probably had the experience of being very upset but stuck with obligations that force you to wear a smile. Save your friend the embarrassment of having to run into the back room to cry and take on some of their responsibilities. There are lots of ways that you can do this. You can: Give a coworker one or more of your paid sick days, watch their other kids for them so that they can have some time to grieve alone, cover their shift at work, etc. Another responsibility they may have now is dealing with all of the things that they may have bought for the baby. Most mothers don't want to keep the items, so a long process of returning items to stores, selling the items, or bringing them to a charity will begin. You can offer to do this for her, since the experience can be even more soul crushing. Even the most simple daily tasks can feel overwhelming when we're going through a hard time emotionally. By taking on some of these tasks for them, you can give them the chance to relax and go through the normal emotions of grief. This is also doubly helpful to a woman who has miscarried, as the physical repercussions can be painful and last up to several months. You can make them food. Try filling their freezer with a week's worth of dinners ready to go in the microwave. You can clean their home for them; vacuuming, doing the dishes, cleaning the bathroom, etc. Taking care of the yard is another household chore that's bad enough when you feel great, nevermind when you just want to cry in bed. Don't help your friend and talk to them for just two weeks and then go on with life, pretending like nothing has changed. This makes the effort you put in and the concern you showed seem insincere. Instead, check in with your friend every once in a while and see how they're doing. This tells them that you really do care about their wellbeing, which can go a long way towards helping them recover. You don't have to say much or even mention the miscarriage explicitly. All you have to do is call them up or invite them out for coffee every now and again and say something like, "How are you? Tell me how things have been going with you. I've been so worried but you do seem like you're doing better." A lot of the time, people focus on consoling the woman who miscarried and forget all about her partner. It takes more than one person to make a baby and this person has also suffered a great loss. Even if you don't know your friend's partner well, you should still offer your condolences, even if its just in the form of a card that your friend can pass along. This can mean the world to your friend's partner, especially if few people have been offering their support to them. Encourage your friend to talk to their partner too, if they aren't. Your friend might feel like they can't discuss the loss with their partner. They may also share the misconception that just because men grieve differently, that they aren't grieving at all. Encourage your friend to give their partner a safe environment in which to express their grief. Going to a couple's counselor can also help.
What is a summary of what this article is about?
Help educate others so that uncomfortable situations are avoided. Give them the opportunity for alone time by taking on some of their responsibilities. Help them with daily tasks. Continue to help them over time. Don't forget that their partner could also use a kind word.