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Remember that though your intentions may be good, sometimes your words might hurt others. Before speaking about a sensitive topic, ask yourself if what you're about to say is true, helpful and kind. Use "I" statements to describe your own thoughts instead of guessing at what others think or feel. For instance, you can say "I'm feeling uncomfortable with the decision made in today's meeting" instead of "You should be upset about that decision today." Always make statements from your own point of view and perspective. Avoid being defensive or blaming others. If you need to discuss something serious with someone, practice your words beforehand. Always know your audience before delivering a message. This will help to ensure that it is well received and understood. Determine whether email or in-person communication works best or if news is best delivered in groups or in one-on-one settings. For instance, perhaps you need to tell your staff that there will be budget cuts. In the past you may have used email to deliver sensitive information, but have found that caused confusion. Call a staff meeting instead and deliver the facts while providing time for questions. Schedule individual meetings as necessary or requested. Instead of always making decisions on your own, listen to the perspectives of others. Thank them for telling you how they feel so that they always feel comfortable doing so. Take time to consider others' opinions, but stand firm by your own decisions when you feel that you have made the best choice. Say "Thank you for your honesty, Jason. I'll take what you said about universal healthcare into consideration and I'll do more research." When speaking to others, don't be aggressive, but do be confident. Speak slowly and deliberately. Sit with your legs and arms uncrossed and look people in the eye when they are speaking. You should still acknowledge when you don't know something. For example, say, "I'm not sure about that subject and don't know the answer right now, but I'll be sure to look into it further." Instead of being overly direct about your thoughts and feelings, add a bit of fluff. Make suggestions instead of telling people what to do. A diplomatic person does not bark out orders, but finds ways to inspire others to action instead. Your goal should be to collaborate with your team and encourage them to do their best. For instance, if you are managing a conflict between your children, you might say "You two might want to consider a better way to divide up the space in your room so that you fight less." You can say to an employee who's often late "Have you considered taking the interstate to work instead? It's a bit quicker in my experience." If you choose to say this, say it to someone who you have a good relationship with. It could be perceived as passive-aggressive in some contexts. Having good manners is key to diplomacy. Wait your turn to speak and never interrupt others. Be encouraging and avoid hurling insults. Keep your voice at a natural and neutral level and avoid cursing or yelling. Perhaps you have to work with people who you really don't like or whose actions you consider offensive. However, being diplomatic is not just for those you get along with. Practice deep-breathing techniques to calm you when others stress you out. If you feel that you are going to cry or yell, walk away for a moment to use the restroom. Consider trying a meditation app such as Insight Timer to help you manage your emotions. Alternatively, you could try grounding yourself in the moment. Focus your attention on how your feet feel against the floor or how your buttocks feels against your chair.
Choose your words carefully. Adapt your communication style based on the situation. Be open to new ideas. Be assertive with your words and body language. Use indirect language. Mind your manners. Control your emotions.