Q: You've made your mind up to change, but how and why? Clearly identifying the problem, or the aspect of yourself that is leading you to seek change, is the only way it can be solved. What will changing result in? It's best to start positive. Write down a list of what you like about yourself. If that's difficult, what do others say they like about you? Knowing your good qualities makes it easier to draw on them later to get rid of the habits you're trying to kick. In one sentence, state exactly what you want. Make sure it's what you want and not what others think you should want. If you don't actually desire change, it won't come. Next, make a list of reasons why you want this change. Seeing all the motivations written down in front of you--and referring to it later--will keep you on the right path. Making self-affirmations, or telling yourself positive things about yourself, may help you establish your core values and stay focused on the person you want to be. While unrealistic self-affirmations (like "I accept everything about myself completely") may not work because they could trigger potential argument with yourself, realistic positive statements like "I am a valuable person and a hard worker" may help you stay positive and even become a better problem-solver. To make effective self-affirmations, try the following: Use "I am" statements For example, "I am a good person;" "I am a hard worker;" "I am creative." Use "I can" statements For example, "I can reach my full potential;" "I can become who I want to be;" "I can achieve my goals." Use "I will" statements For example, "I will become the person I want to be;" "I will overcome obstacles;" "I will prove to myself that I can improve my life." Visualization is a kind of mental rehearsal that can help you imagine a different situation. You can have an abstract visualization (all in your head) or a more concrete expression of your visualization, like a collection of images that represent what you're working towards. Effective visualization can help you determine specifics about what you're working toward and can help you hone your goals. Further, visualization can help you develop a sense of control over a situation or over your life. To visualize your changed future: Close your eyes. Picture your ideal future self. Where are you? What are you doing? How is your situation different? What do you look like? What specific things about your changed life are making you feel happy? Allow yourself to picture and explore very specific details of your ideal life. What does it look like? Try to conjure specific sights/sounds/smells/tastes. Concrete details will make your visualization more real. Use this positive visualization to help you set goals for how to achieve that vision of your life. Things happen in life that we could never expect. Your path to change is going to be littered with obstacles and people trying to bog you down. Knowing that the pitfalls in the road are minor setbacks and can be overcome is necessary for success. Staying realistic is the best way to tackle any daunting topic. Don't blame yourself or others for keeping you from your goal. Setbacks are normal and will happen. You may experience moments that feel like failure. You don't reach a goal or a milestone, your straight line to your goal ends up being a very curvy road, or you end up changing your goals to something completely different along the way. Remember, however, that failures aren't failures; they're opportunities. You can learn valuable lessons from missteps, and you may learn that being a little flexible about your long term goals can lead you to a happier life. If change could come overnight, it wouldn't be worth it. You may not see results as soon as you had planned. It's also sometimes difficult to see change or results in yourself as quickly or easily as someone may be able to from the outside. You change a little every day, and it might be difficult for you to notice or monitor your own change, but it is happening. Setting smaller goals or milestones within a larger goal can help you evaluate whether you're heading in the right direction. Rewarding yourself for reaching those milestones can help you stay motivated to keep going!
A: Identify the problem. Do self-affirmations. Visualize your changed future. Expect disruption. Learn from apparent failure. Be patient.

Q: The worst mistake you can make is to walk into a comedy set completely cold. This sets you up for nervously laughing at your own jokes! Even the best comedians need to spend some time preparing what they are going to say. Create a set list for yourself. Make a list of each joke you will tell. Think about transitions. How does one joke flow into the next? Is there some kind of logical progression? Keep in mind what kind of people you expect to see in the audience. Certain demographics will be more or less likely to enjoy certain types of jokes. An open mic at a church, for example, may not be the best place to try out very dirty material. Whether you're the type of comic who follows a script or one who tends to free-style, rehearsal will always make your set better. Plus, it is the most effective way to stop yourself from laughing at your own jokes. Set aside time to run through your entire set 2-3 times before you take the stage. The more times you rehearse your jokes, the more normalized they become, and the less likely you are to laugh. Be sure to time yourself. This way you'll ensure that you have the right amount of material, and you can move through your set without concerning yourself with time. before taking the stage. Taking the stage cold sets you up for nervous laughter. Before you take the stage, find a way to warm yourself up, and release any "silly energy." Put on your favorite song and dance around making funny noises and goofy faces in the mirror. Laugh at yourself. Move your body, use your voice, and wiggle the muscles in your face. All of these actions dispel nervous energy and prepare you to tell jokes on stage effectively, without bursting into laughter. If you do a good job of making the people around you laugh, you won't need to laugh to fill the silence. Prevent yourself from laughing at your own jokes by making other people laugh. Use vocal variation. Don't fall into a monotone delivery. Signal the punchline. Pause for a moment to let the audience know it's coming. Use a call-back. Reference something funny you said near the beginning of your set near the end. Audiences love this. If you really want to strengthen your comedy and prevent yourself from laughing at your own jokes, the only true remedy is spending as much time as you can telling jokes on stage. You can't perform once a month (or less) and expect to improve at your craft. Try to make it out 1-3 times per week. Begin by seeking out comedy open mics. You can find these advertised at coffee shops or bars, or in a local entertainment paper. Open mics are where you can practice, connect with other comics, and gain exposure. If you do well at open mics, you will be invited to perform at more regular gigs.
A:
Be prepared. Rehearse jokes. Warm up Sharpen your comedy skills. Perform regularly.