Q:Build a movie plot around this: Who did Goody pretend to be to Danny? Stacy
A:
BFF gets a new meaning with Goody (a well-preserved CLUELESS alumni Alicia Silverstone) and Stacey (Bettie Page reborn pale-skinned beauty Krysten Ritter) living up the night. Goody's been around, like forever, like even before the electric light bulb was invented. She got sired by a stem vampire, Cisserus, and is the soft-hearted type, opting rather to feed on rats rather than humans. She was thrilled by new developments on the social scene during the Roaring Twenties, what with the Flappers being the first party girls and all that. Hey, if you were born during 1841 you'd have lived during some pretty repressed times! Anyway, things turned wild after the big wars, much excitement through the Fifties, Sixties and Seventies, but then came 1992, when Cisserus sired Stacy, a drug addict, turning her 'life' around as a sister for Goody, who taught her all the basic vampire stuff she needed to know. In turn, hip, with it social butterfly (bat?) Stacey taught techno-illiterate Goody about the Internet, e-mail and Napster, not forgetting Greenday. Goody is kind of socially inept, she needs help putting on her lipstick (vampires can't see themselves in mirrors) and her fashion sense is stuck in the 1970s (jeans). Goody thinks Stacy is real cute as they wake up in their matching coffins facing each others', but Stacey kind of has a lame sense of humor, like blocking Goody's lid with a desk. But they make a fun duo racing off to Goth night at a local night club, Goody streaking at inhuman lightning speed down the fire escape, while the more avant garde Stacy crawls creepily down the side of the building, reverse quadruped-style, like a giant cockroach.Goody abhors the v-word. She is an ELF, extended life-form. Their support group is Sanguines Anonymous.. Here they meet up with other ghouls of the community. Like Vlad Tepesh, who has now refrained from impaling victims for 362 years.Eating habits. Atrocious. They feast on rats, drinking their blood with straws, exactly like children slurp down soda pop. Goody also gets...