In this task, you must classify if a given review is positive/negative, indicating your answer as P or N.

[Q]: steve martin is one of the funniest men alive . if you can take that as a true statement , then your disappointment at this film will equal mine .
martin can be hilarious , creating some of the best laugh - out - loud experiences that have ever taken place in movie theaters .
you wo n't find any of them here .
the old television series that this is based on has its moments of humor and wit .
bilko ( and the name is n't an accident ) is the head of an army motor pool group , but his passion is his schemes .
every episode involves the sergeant and his men in one or another hair - brained plan to get rich quick while outwitting the officers of the base .
" mchale 's navy " 's granddaddy .
that 's the idea behind this movie too , but the difference is that , as far - fetched and usually goofy as the television series was , it was funny .
there is not one laugh in the film .
the re - make retains the goofiness , but not the entertainment .
everything is just too clean .
it was obviously made on a hollywood back lot and looks every bit like it .
it all looks brand new , even the old beat - up stuff .
martin is remarkably small in what should have been a bigger than life role .
in the original , phil silvers played the huckster with a heart of gold and more than a touch of sleaziness .
martin 's bilko is a pale imitation .
the only semi - bright spot is phil hartman as bilko 's arch - enemy .
it 's not saying much , considering martin 's lackluster character , but hartman leaves him in the dust .
[A]: N

[Q]: after enduring mariah carey 's film debut , glitter , i 'm reminded of a bit from chris rock 's bigger and blacker .
in response to women saying that they can raise a child without a man , rock says , " you can drive a car with your feet , but that do n't mean it should be done .
" to that i say , you can give mariah carey a movie , but that certainly do n't mean it should be done .
sure , there are plenty of pop star film vehicles out there -- from the beatles ' a hard day 's night to the spice girls ' spice world -- but none have been so vapidly pointless or laughable as glitter .
everything about this complete tripe is ludicrous .
start off with the story , which -- as gruesomely predictable as it is -- is the least offensive part of the movie .
the film is inexplicably set in the 80s ,
a period piece that really shows no sign of its period except for a few chicks in leg warmers .
worse yet
, everyone 's speaking late 90s hip - hop slang in what should be 1983 .
meant to be partially autobiographical , carey plays billie frank , a young singer in new york who struggles to overcome a rough childhood and abandonment by her alcoholic mother .
influential club dj julian dice , a .
k . a .
" lucky 7
" ( max beesley playing a bad mix of puff daddy and robert de niro ) , hears her sing on a track , and decides to make her a star .
in predictably rapid succession , billie and dice fall for each other , she starts hitting it big , dice gets jealous and starts acting like an ass , and suddenly billie 's on " the roller coaster of superstardom .
" in the meantime , billie is on an emotional hunt for her missing mom .
i wo n't give away the ending , but -- honestly -- just think of unicorns and rainbows .
. .
you 'll figure it out .
the movie screams to be made with camp , and that could 've been fun .
but the filmmakers thought making the bulk of glitter weepy and dramatic would be better .
what a mistake .
the brief attempts at comic relief -- as in a scene where an effeminate russian - sounding director gets wacky with filming billie 's first music video -- go over like lead balloons .
instead , the audience at my screening tended to laugh loudest during mariah 's most dramatic scenes .
which brings us to the performances , of which there 's nothing good that can be said
.
mariah is primarily seen with a wide - eyed deer - in - the - headlights look frozen on her face .
she actually looks scared during her one love scene .
but you have to wonder if the writing is n't even worse .
so much of the dialogue is so hackneyed and watered down for carey 's virginal target audience that it 's probably impossible for any actor to pull it off with aplomb .
even the characters could n't have been written more absurdly .
they 're all members of a barbie playset : the important film director who swoons , " billie , i 'd love to put you in a movie i 'm making , " and the big - time record executive who takes billie 's demo tape and says , " oh , i 'll make sure the whole team listens to it in the morning .
" everyone in the film is a device , and it 's painful to keep watching just to see another one appear .
to say more would be a waste .
there 's so much wrong with this film .
and , it pains me that mariah carey -- with her ego and sanity in such fragile condition these days , as evidenced by her multiple hospital stays -- will have to suffer through all the negative reviews she 's likely to get .
but , then again , i had to suffer through her movie .
[A]: N

[Q]: billy bob thornton , who had a sudden rise to fame with 1996 's sling blade after spending years as a virtually unknown actor and writer , is becoming one of the most versatile - and most accomplished - american actors around at the moment .
as jacob , the simple but at times very bright loser brother of bill paxton 's hank , thornton gives a performance which should leave an indelible mark on all but the most hardened viewers .
three men , hank ( paxton ) , jacob ( thornton ) and their friend lou ( brent briscoe ) stumble upon a plane wreck which , upon closer inspection , yields a rotting corpse and a bag full of money .
jacob and lou want to pocket the cash .
hank , the smarter - and perhaps more naive - of the three , insists on leaving the money for the authorities to find .
eventually , they agree to keep the cash safe until the plane is found , and then split the money three ways .
things start going wrong , though , with greed and violence weaving their ways through their plan .
disaster is sure to strike .
director sam raimi , of the evil dead and darkman fame , has made an excellent and thought - provoking film
, worlds away from the comic horror films which made his name .
while there are a couple of moments which might remind one of his earlier work , raimi has made an intelligent and mature departure which will hopefully be a sign of even greater films to come .
scott
b. smith 's screenplay , based on his novel ( which i have n't read ) is a fine example of escalating tension .
while it does remind one of danny boyle 's shallow grave without the abundance of black humour , it keeps the drama that should really be a part of such a story on morality , or the lack thereof , found in a film with this subject matter .
alar kivilo 's cinematography reminds one of joel and ethan coen 's fargo , with the bleak , snowy landscape almost becoming another character .
danny elfman also does well with his moody , finely - written score .
if there 's a flaw in the film , it 's that it goes on for just a little too long .
just when we think that they are about to wrap things up , raimi and smith decide to let the film go on a little further .
while this is n't really a bad thing , it did become a little frustrating at times ( this may have been due to the fact that i had consumed a large sprite beforehand ) .
the performances are excellent , with the usually annoying paxton in fine form and bridget fonda giving a scene - stealing turn as hank 's scheming wife .
this is an excellent showcase for thornton 's fine skills as an actor and a great change in direction for raimi , who could very well have a career ahead of him as an accomplished director of dramatic films .
fingers crossed , though , that this does n't stop him from making another evil dead sequel .
[A]:
P