Problem: This review is like what?
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Review:**SPOILERS** A bit ridicules made for TV movie has sexy and middle age gold-digger Isabelle Collins, Susan Tucci,doing a number on every man she comes in contact with in the movie. First winning over their hearts then their wallets and then, when their no longer any use to her, thrown in the wastepaper basket like a used up Kleenex tissue.

Isabelle's first victim is non other then her abusive, on keeping Isabelle from raiding his bank account, husband Stewart, John O'Hurley. It's later in the movie when Isabelle gets very friendly with former plumber and now yacht salesman Richard Davis, Philip Casnoff, that she, without really telling him, has the totally love-sick Richard get a contract out on her unsuspecting husbands life. Getting this ex-convict, in fact as soon as he's released from prison, Daggett, Nicholas Campbell, to do the job on Stewart Richard soon finds out that he didn't get exactly what he paid, $15,000.00 in cash,for.

Getting a little too greedy Daggett not only blew Stewart's brains out but took a solid gold watch, that Stewart offered him in order to spear his life, as well. The watch was easily traced to Daggett as he tried to pawn it at a local jewelry shop where he was quickly arrested. With Doggett spilling his guts out on who hired him to whack Stewart it doesn't take long for the long arm of the law to arrest Stewart's, by hiring Doggett, killer Isabelle's husband to be ex-plumber and yacht salesman Richard Davis! Davis' arrest by the police happens just as he and Isabelle took the vows of matrimony in a local church!

Isabelle manipulates everyone, exclusively men that fall head over heels for her, to her advantage by getting them to do her dirty work. Always playing the part of the naive housewife or widow or lover or even client Isabelle seems to live a charmed life always one step ahead of the law and police. No matter what she does Isabelle covers her pretty behind so well that it's almost impossible to pin her down on any, in having others do them, of the many crimes that she commits, through a second party, in the film.

After screwing, figuratively as well as literally, her first husband Steven her second husband, for less then ten seconds, Richard and finally her, or Richard's, attorney Gavin Kendrick, Kamar De Los Rey, Isabelle knows that it's only a matter of time before the police get wise to her. With the D.A getting both Richard and Kendrick to turn evidence against her Isabelle now knowing that everything is fast closing in on her makes her final move. Getting everything in order, by transferring all her cash overseas, Isabelle and her 10 year-old daughter Ruby, Lauren Collins, shoot down to the passport office in order to get clearance, passports, to get out of the country.

It's then when the cagey and clever Isabelle makes her first and possibly last and fatal mistake in the movie. Isabelle is told by the passport clerk, Don Carrier, she'll have to wait a full 48 hours for her, and Ruby's, passport to clear! Just enough time for the police to find and arrest her! Outlandish ending that goes against almost everything and every ethic that's in a film noir or crime movie. An ending that will not only blow your mind but your concept of what's right and wrong in the world!
+++++++++
A: negative

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Review:This film was choppy, incoherent and contrived. It was also an extremely mean-spirited portrayal of women. I rented it because it was listed as a comedy (that's a stretch), and because the cover said Andie McDowell was acting up a storm in it. She wasn't. I'm a gal, I watched this film with two guys, and we spent an hour afterwards exclaiming over how bad it was.

WARNING: PLOT SUMMARY BELOW! RAMPANT SPOILERS!

The movie starts out with a fairly hackneyed plot about an older woman who takes up with a younger man, to the severe disapproval of her two jealous single girlfriends. They want her to marry a boring guy their own age who is kind of in love with her. But she's so happy with her oversexed puppy that you're rooting for them to stick it out, and sure enough, she decides to marry the guy. But her harpy girlfriend, aided by the wishy-washy one, sets up a plot to trick our heroine into thinking the guy is cheating on her. It works. She has a fight with him, he runs out of the house and is crushed by a truck (Remember the movie's title?) So now he's dead, two-thirds of the way through the film. And although our heroine is a school headmistress who spends her time watching over girls, she apparently forgot to use birth control and is pregnant.

She's already broken off relations with her girlfriends, because they were so unsupportive. Alone and pitiful, she decides to marry the boring guy. Did I mention that the boring guy who kind of loves her is a minister? She had asked him to marry her to the young guy (nice, huh?), but now she tells him she'll marry him, and apparently he has no objections to being dicked around in this fashion. But her girlfriends rescue her at the altar and take her home, where they not-quite-confess that they were mostly responsible for the love of her life getting smushed. She has the kid. In the final scene, they leave it in a crib inside her house while they go out on the porch to drink, smoke and be smug. I kid you not, it's that bad. I left out the part about the cancer red-herring and the harpy's ridiculous lesbian moment.
+++++++++
A: negative

Problem: This review is like what?
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Review:This was an impulse pick up for me from the local video store. Don't make the same mistake I did. This movie is tedious, unconvincingly acted, and generally boring. The dialogue between the young priest and his uncle is particularly poorly written and delivered; I cringed at every scene they shared. Dennis Hopper makes a few sparse appearances and is his usual disjointed self; his role was clearly not a stretch for him. And although the movie is supposedly set in Puerto Rico, it feels a lot more like a Hollywood movie lot; all of the main characters are Caucasian and several tend to speak English with pseudo-Irish accents. Odd. Anyway, when you see this one on the shelf of your local video store, keep walking.
+++++++++
A:
negative