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Review:The author sets out on a "journey of discovery" of his "roots" in the southern tobacco industry because he believes that the (completely and deservedly forgotten) movie "Bright Leaf" is about an ancestor of his. Its not, and he in fact discovers nothing of even mild interest in this absolutely silly and self-indulgent glorified home movie, suitable for screening at (the director's) drunken family reunions but certainly not for commercial - or even non-commercial release. A good reminder of why most independent films are not picked up by major studios - because they are boring, irrelevant and of no interest to anyone but the director and his/her immediate circles. Avoid at all costs!
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A: negative

Problem: This review is like what?
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Review:*** WARNING! SPOILERS CONTAINED HEREIN! ***

This is a semi-autobiographical look at what might happen to Madonna if she were ever to be stranded on a deserted island. There's absolutely no challenge to Madonna in this role, and it shows. She's just Madonna playing Madonna, and she can't even get THAT right. I know what you're saying, you're saying, "How do you know this is what Madonna is really like, you've never met her!" Correct, I haven't, but we all remember "Truth or Dare", don't we? I know Kevin Costner does.

You would think, in the year 2002, that Madonna might have learned something, one way or the other, from the "crossover" ladies that have also made their way across the silver screen. For goodness' sake, hasn't Madonna seen "Glitter"? Mariah Carey showed the film world HOW IT IS DONE!!! Mariah kicks Madonna's trashy butt to the curb in beauty, talent, screen presence, charisma, characterization, you name it! All we see from this glimpse into Madonna's world is she's the only one in it.

If there's one thing to be said for Madonna, it is that she's consistent. When she was an MTV darling, she set the world of women's fashion back 20 years. Now, in film, she has set women's roles in film AND society back 20 years, by glamourizing all the most hated, horrible, reprehensible, odious qualities women have been reputed to have locked away inside them, qualities they have been so desperately trying to prove they really don't possess.

***HERE'S THE SPOILERS!!! DON'T READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW...***

Here's the one good thing I will say about this film, and I really was impressed by it. They didn't go for the "Hollywood Ending" - Madonna's character lives. In the typical, happy Hollywood ending, Madonna's character would have died on the island, and her long-suffering, oppressed, whipped husband would have been free to finally settle down with a good, decent woman, a woman who would be the exact opposite of his deceased wife, and they both live happily ever after. But in this extremely depressing conclusion, she is rescued, and once more, this poor victim of a husband is once again saddled with his demon of a wife, and his life will once again become a living hell.

*** HERE ENDETH THE SPOILERS ***
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A: negative

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Review:Trying to compare or represent this "swill" as anything "Hitchcockian" is an out-n-out attempt to mislead Hitchcock fans to waste $7 on this movie... Weak acting Weak story Weak script.

No real suspense, no thrills. You wait all through the weakness of this movie for the big payoff or even any payoff...You're left thinking, what the heck was that all about.

And please, enough with the movement to make "alternative lifestyles" HIP and politically correct!!...I can't recommend this to anyone...Did I mention how weak the acting is? Williams did a better job as Peter Pan and "Mork". But those were MUCH more innocent times...........
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A: negative

Problem: This review is like what?
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Review:I can watch B,B&C and feel all the emotions I felt when I first saw it at aged 18 well,maybe all but one.Certainly Miss K.Novak has lost none of her silky allure in nearly half a century.She was a thinking youth's Diana Dors.All those thinking youths now collecting their pensions can briefly regain the heart - clutching,collar - tightening,blood - pulsing ardour they felt when she gazed directly into their eyes back in the days when they were being told that they had never had it so good. Now,huddled up against the cold and fearful of being mugged by a Hoodie,they scuttle home as fast as their arthritic knees can carry them from the Video Shop,relatively happy in the certain knowledge that within the triple - locked comparative safety of their fourth - floor tower block flat they can regain just a small fragment of their lost youth and perhaps reflect that love truly is eternal. This movie is Miss Novak's Golden Moment.She seized it avidly and gave a performance of awesome voluptuousness combined with a hypnotic awareness of her own sex - appeal and,despite all this,she convinces us that her character possesses a strange and beguiling innocence. She completely dominates the amiable Mr J.Stewart who seems resigned to handing her the movie.Misses E.Lanchester and H.Gingold offer comic relief along with Mr E. Kovacs whose peculiar talents are strictly proscribed.Mr J.Lemmon plays Miss Novak's brother.He is a beatnik,a species that disappeared as soon as it realised that its existence was being acknowledged by the mainstream.Some of the more hardcore beats reinvented themselves as hippies a few years later.Certainly they had become figures of fun by 1958 and Mr Lemmon does not appear overly concerned with restraint in portraying one. But all else is mere frippery,Miss Novak - bathed in a particularly beautiful spectrum of Technicolor - is the sole raison - d'etre for "Bell,Book and Candle".It survives,its reputation enhanced,as the ultimate showcase for one of Hollywood's most beautiful women. Loved by moviegoers,ignored by critics,Miss Novak will continue to captivate with that enigmatic smile all the time thinking old men have the strength to push the "Play" buttons on their DVDs.One day,probably after we are all gone,she will be discovered by a new generation who will - belatedly - realise that it is quite possible for a woman to be fully - dressed and sexually attractive at the same time.
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A:
positive