Build a movie plot around this: Who is a lonely romance novelist in New York City? Joan
Joan Wilder (Kathleen Turner) is a New-York based writer of cheap romance novels. She's a bit clumsy in real life, although in her novels she writes about strong-minded heroines and sexy male adventurers falling in love passionately. One day, she finds her condo, where she lives with only the company of a cat, in a mess. Right away she has a frightening call: her sister Elaine (Mary Ellen Trainor) has been kidnapped in South America. She decides to go there to save her. There is a map which leads to a huge treasure which is the price which the kidnappers ask for to free Elaine.She has to take a bus to Cartagena, in Colombia, but she has trouble with the language spoken there, Spanish. She gets on a coach, but she is afraid she has taken the wrong one, so she asks the driver (Camilo Garcia) while en route. The driver gets distracted because he can't understand her and has an accident. The bus is wrecked.Joan asks adventurer Jack T. Colton (Michael Douglas), to take her to the place in the map. He accepts because he wants the money to buy a ship. They are followed by some mysterious Latin men and soldiers, commanded by corrupt policeman Zolo (Manuel Ojeda). Ralph, (Danny DeVito) is organizing their capture from far away, because he wants the map as well. He is even less equipped to life in a poor Latin American country than Joan is.Joan and Jack fall down a spring, they have to cross a wide river, and eventually they get lost. They find a crashed airplane with boxes of marijuana, and they spend the night there, because outside it's pouring down with rain. When they leave the next morning, after Jack has saved Joan from being bitten by a poisonous snake, they arrive at a small village. They ask for a phone or a car there, but several dangerous-looking men tell them there is not any. Asking at a mansion, they are helped because Juan (renowned film director Alfonso Arau) recognises Joan. Juan calls her Juanita Wilder, and says that he always reads her novels aloud to the thugs. He invites Joan and Jack, and...