[Q]: Build a movie plot around this: Who acts as the tour guide? Jolly Jimmy Johnson
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[A]: The film begins as Ringo and his aunt Jessie Robbins walk hurriedly to catch the Magical Mystery Tour bus for an afternoon trip to the English countryside, double meaning on the word "trip", as a major punning tool for the late 60s, when everybody was dropping out, turning on, and tuning in. As an unidentified voice over narrates, this trip to the country has alternate layers of meaning and understanding and this is evident in the overbearing presence of Jolly Jimmy Johnson (Derek Royle), the tour guide. As the tour progresses other characters pop up to meet John and George and Paul. There is The Lovely Starlet (Maggie Wright) whom everyone wants to meet, and there is the strange Buster Bloodvessel (Ivor Cutler) who has fun saying his name, and there is The Accordionist (Shirley Evans) who leads everyone in a sing-a-long, and there is Miss Wendy Winters the Hostess (Mandy Weet) who keeps thing in perspective. As the tour continues there is a road rally with the bus and several other followers in cars such as a Bentley and a Mini Cooper. The scene shifts to 5 magicians (John, Paul, George and Ringo, and Mal Evans) in a remote castle as the voice over explains overseeing the position of the bus, and in some ways controlling its movement. As the bus stops for a tour of a military post an Army Sergeant (Victor Spinetti) barks directions and instructions in an indiscernible voice as the tour group follows him through the camp. Along the way the narrative of the bus tour is interrupted by musical interludes which introduce ideas and imaginations of Paul, George and John who are taking the tour. The bus later stops at a strip club and all the men disembark to watch a band The Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band play a rendition of "Death Cab for Cutie" as The Stripper (Jan Carson) performs. Then at the end of the day the tour turns home.

[Q]: Build a movie plot around this: What does Niran carry Amana off on? Motorcycle
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[A]: For many centuries, the phi song neng (vampires who have vowed never to drink human blood) have lived among the villages of the Far East. One day over 800 years ago, a young human warlord named Niran fell in love with one of the song neng, a woman named Sang. Niran wanted Sang for his own, so he killed her husband and son. In her pain and rage, Sang attacked and bit Niran during a Songkran (New Year) solar eclipse, turning him into a vampire. From Niran's bloodline have come many jai tham (vampires who drink human blood and kill for pleasure). Only Sang can end the jai tham's nightly attacks on humans. Doing so, however, will end the entire bloodline and turn every vampire, song neng as well as jai tham, into mere mortals again. Since the coming Songkran festival will feature the first solar eclipse in 800 years, Sang intends to kill herself by exposing herself to the sun's rays at the end of the eclipse and thus wipe out all the vampires in Thailand.Connor (Colin Egglesfield) and Amanda (Meredith Monroe) are vacationing in Thailand during this year's Songkran festival. Connor, trained since childhood in Muay Thai (Thai boxing), takes Amanda to see a match. However, Amanda cannot take the brutality and goes back to their hotel alone. On the way, she gets lost in the Phang Nga market, and Mr Nice Guy (Dom Hetrakul) offers to show her the way to her hotel. He leads her on a short cut down a deserted alley, then turns into the vampire Niran, drinking her blood and carrying her off on a motorcycle. Connor tries to follow, but he is stopped by another vampire, obviously intent on killing him. Just as the vampire is about to succeed, a bald-headed man appears and chops off the vampire's head. Connor begs for his help finding Amanda, but he warns Connor to leave Thailand immediately and threatens to kill Connor if he follows him. Connor stealthily follows Kiko (Roger Yuan) home to Kong Sai House.When the police refuse to consider Amanda missing until 48 hours have passed, Connor goes back to Kong Sai House, only...

[Q]: Build a movie plot around this: Who does the tour bus follow through a camp? An Army Sargent
****
[A]: The film begins as Ringo and his aunt Jessie Robbins walk hurriedly to catch the Magical Mystery Tour bus for an afternoon trip to the English countryside, double meaning on the word "trip", as a major punning tool for the late 60s, when everybody was dropping out, turning on, and tuning in. As an unidentified voice over narrates, this trip to the country has alternate layers of meaning and understanding and this is evident in the overbearing presence of Jolly Jimmy Johnson (Derek Royle), the tour guide. As the tour progresses other characters pop up to meet John and George and Paul. There is The Lovely Starlet (Maggie Wright) whom everyone wants to meet, and there is the strange Buster Bloodvessel (Ivor Cutler) who has fun saying his name, and there is The Accordionist (Shirley Evans) who leads everyone in a sing-a-long, and there is Miss Wendy Winters the Hostess (Mandy Weet) who keeps thing in perspective. As the tour continues there is a road rally with the bus and several other followers in cars such as a Bentley and a Mini Cooper. The scene shifts to 5 magicians (John, Paul, George and Ringo, and Mal Evans) in a remote castle as the voice over explains overseeing the position of the bus, and in some ways controlling its movement. As the bus stops for a tour of a military post an Army Sergeant (Victor Spinetti) barks directions and instructions in an indiscernible voice as the tour group follows him through the camp. Along the way the narrative of the bus tour is interrupted by musical interludes which introduce ideas and imaginations of Paul, George and John who are taking the tour. The bus later stops at a strip club and all the men disembark to watch a band The Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band play a rendition of "Death Cab for Cutie" as The Stripper (Jan Carson) performs. Then at the end of the day the tour turns home.

[Q]: Build a movie plot around this: Who's shot during the Canadian Army's surprise invasion? Terence and Philip
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[A]:
A musical, based on the Comedy Central animated series by the same creative team of Trey Parker and Matt Stone. Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman go to see the new movie ("Asses of Fire") by their favorite (and very foul-mouthed) comedians, the Canadians Terence and Philip. The boys' use of profanity grows exponentially after viewing the movie, and the popularity of both the movie and the profanity come to the indignant attention of the school's teachers and then the boys' parents. Kyle's mother Sheila begins a crusade against first T&P;, then against all of Canada. Meanwhile, the boys have seen the movie several more times and argue over whether or not you can really set a fart on fire. Kenny takes a dare (and some money), lights a fart but sets himself on fire in the process and dies in the ER. He then goes to Hell and meets Satan and Satan's boyfriend Saddam Hussein. As the diabolical pair await their chance to excape Hell and take over the world, anti-Canadian sentiment grows to full-blown hatemongering and war crimes and the US bombs Toronto. A newly-designed "V-chip" electrically curbs Cartman's use of profanity, much to his disgust. In a showstopping full-cast production number, The four boys form an underground movement called "La Resistance" to rescue T&P; from electrocution (during a USO show) before America's planned troop surge into Canada. Many town residents have joined the Army, including Chef, whose segregated unit is expected to serve as cannon fodder in "Operation Human Shield", much to Chef's disgust. In Hell, Satan grows increasingly unhappy over continually taking mental abuse from the eternally-horny Saddam Hussein. "La Resistance" mounts a rocky but ultimately successful rescue attempt during the USO show ("Just remember what the MPAA says--'Horrific, deplorable violence is OKAY, as long as people DON'T SAY ANY NAUGHTY WORDS!' "). After the Canadian army's surprise invasion and subsequent horrific battle, Terence and Philip are shot. Once their innocent blood touches the ground, Satan and...