Problem: This review is like what?
OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive

Review:This has the logical consistency of marshmallows filled with ketchup, and the overall aftertaste is just as disgusting.

Will be used in the 9th circle of Hell at recreation time. Just plain torture.

I would rather choose to watch 90 minutes of my computer going through 5400 blue screens of death than watch this appalling drivel again - ever. Horrible. Horrible. Horrible.

You know, the good thing about Swiss Cheese is that along with the holes you get some cheese: here it's ONLY holes - and the excitement factor? Well that turns watching paint dry into an adrenalin rush and an Olympic speed sport.

My brain hurts from trying to work out who OK'd this drivel, did they think about the premise? (I sincerely hope not, otherwise there is no redemption) the only consolation is they had the pleasure of sitting through the rushes. Made for TV should not be a synonym for: "Sure, let the horses bowels run loose across the living rooms! Our audience are idiots!"

I was hooked just to know how it could get any worse. This is not a good sign, folks.

Hallmark should be ashamed for releasing it.

I should be ashamed for watching it.

I am ashamed. I'm off for a long shower.
+++++++++
A: negative

Problem: This review is like what?
OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive

Review:Why do I constantly do this to myself? I mean, really, it's right there in the title - "The Incredible Melting Man". What else would I expect? I have to admit, I'm a sucker for just about anything I come across on the Monster HD channel, but the only redeeming feature of this picture would be that truly grotesque makeup job by the legendary Rick Baker. As for creepy, I'll give the nod to that horny old geezer couple sucking on lemons just before lights out. Now they were truly scary.

Something I could never figure out in horror flicks was why a monster's victims wouldn't simply just run away when faced with virtual annihilation. Like the chick in the cabin. You know, there was a door completely visible right there in the kitchen that she could have run right out of at any time. Incredible Steve-O couldn't muster much more than a brisk walk, so why not just blow right by him? I don't know, maybe I'm missing something.

This flick had some of the feel of a 'Tales From The Crypt' episode, but 'Tales' usually had a cool or grotesque twist which often times you didn't see coming. This was one picture that you couldn't quite get a handle on coming OR going. For example, in an early scene, you can clearly make out that Melting Man's eyeball fell out of his head, so how did he manage to get around for the rest of the story? I guess we're not supposed to ask.

At eighty four minutes, this picture was about an hour and a half too long. When it was all over, I was ready to take up General Perry on his earlier suggestion - "I could really use a drink about now".
+++++++++
A: negative

Problem: This review is like what?
OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive

Review:Just watched this after my mother brought it back from America for me, was dreading watching this after all the negative comments on here but I have to say, yes the acting is cheesy, some of the effects are laughable.

But you have to remember this was meant to be 1898 not 2005, and for such a low budget I thought it was quite good. I enjoyed this version much more then the Spielberg version I saw last week.

I have read the book so many times, and found myself going "ahh yes that's in the book" almost all the time, with the other version hardly anything of the book existed.

So well done for at least trying to make a true version.
+++++++++
A: positive

Problem: This review is like what?
OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive

Review:A funny comedy from beginning to end! There are several hilarious scenes but it's also loaded with many subtle comedic moments which is what made the movie for me. Creative story line with a very talented cast. I thoroughly enjoyed it!
+++++++++
A:
positive