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There are many different types of negative behavior. Your parents probably don't do all of these things, but it's important to pinpoint exactly what kind of behavior they are exhibiting that is bothering you. Common behaviors include: Undermining. For example: "I thought you might mess up the order, so I bought it for you." Insulting. Example: "You look fat in that dress" Underestimating or writing off. Example: "You're probably not going to be a good sprinter." Reinforcing a stereotype. Example: "You're a woman, so you should do teaching, not scientific research." Blaming. Example: "It's your fault your coworker was harassing you you always wear sexy shoes." Making excuses for someone. Example: "It's alright to eat junk food. You had a bad day." Limiting someone. Example: "You're a good painter, but you'll never become a really great artist." Making unfavorable comparisons. Example: "Your cousin Jimmy is always on the honor roll. Why aren't you?" Hostility, threats, or verbal abuse. Ignoring someone. Think about your parents' behavior in the past and try to figure out what kind of negative treatment it is. It might be helpful to make a list of specific incidents where your parents behave in a negative way. This will help you pinpoint the negative behavior so that you can talk about it more clearly. If your parents' negative behavior is fueled by their love for you and their desire to see you succeed, then you are in a better position to have a conversation with them about how their negativity makes you feel. If your parents don't have good intentions, this conversation might be more difficult. Negative behaviors driven by good intentions can include things like trust issues, being overprotective, or coddling. Sometimes negative behavior is because of a misunderstanding or due to a personality conflict. These types of negative behavior are usually resolvable with a little communication and effort. But if your parents are abusing you, you might need to take more drastic action. Abuse includes physical abuse (hitting, kicking, using physical force to restrain, etc.), verbal abuse (insults or cursing that make you feel bad), and emotional abuse (anything that doesn't make you feel safe and loved this can be from abandonment, threats, etc.). If you think you are being abused, you should tell an adult you trust. Another family member, a teacher, a school counselor, your pastor these are all good options. You can also call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline for help (1-800-422-4453). But make sure you don't falsely accuse your parents of abuse. There is a big difference between parenting/punishing and actual abuse. And an accusation like that could get your parents in serious trouble.
Identify types of negative behavior. Determine what kinds of negative behavior is bothering you. Determine if your parents have good intentions. Get help if you are being abused by your parents.