Problem: This review is like what?

Review:Let's cut a long story short. I loved every minute of it. A lavish fantasy in true Arabian-Nights style. There's an evil magician, a pretty princess, a djinn and everybody lives happily ever after. Modern Hollywoond sure does have one or two things to learn from this classic. Only quibble: the special effects are pretty dated (loved Sabu with the djinn's foot, though!)
+++++++++
A: positive

Problem: This review is like what?

Review:I saw Brother's Shadow at the Tribeca Film Festival and loved it! Judd Hirsch and Scott Cohen are great as father and son. The film follows Scott Cohen from parole in Alaska back to his family in Brooklyn. He shows up there because his brother has died, and he embarks on a journey to slowly repair his estranged relationships with his brother's wife and child and his father who has never forgiven him for being the black sheep of the family. The story takes us deep into the hearts and minds of this family and allows you to more deeply understand the complexity of their lives. Also, the imagery of the woodworking business and the Brooklyn backdrop sets the tone for this rich and revealing family portrait.
+++++++++
A: positive

Problem: This review is like what?

Review:Amazing. That's what you'd say if you sat through this film. Simply, incredibly, amazing. It's actually so amazing that anyone was stupid enough to dump money into making this monstrosity that you simply can't believe what you're seeing. That, my friends, is what is truly scary about this film. Somebody thought it was a good idea to make it.

Well, here's another amazingly original story: High School student (occasionally seemed like collegego figure) has whore for a mom, lives in a trailer park, and is an "artist" who is ridiculed for his "being all different." Well, of course, this poor ridiculed boy is eventually killed and, here's the original part, his soul inhabits a scarecrow (beneath which, he is killed by his slutty mama's latest john). Then he goes around with the standard killing off of all the people that done hurt him. Awww.

Here's the breakdown:

The Good:

--Amazingly funny movieeven if that's not what the clearly drunk filmmakers wanted.

--This and the sequel on one disk in the Wal-Mart $5.00 binso it's only a little overpriced.

Didn't Hurt It, Didn't Help:

--The violence and gore are kind of sub-standard. One person is stabbed with a corncob.

--Sounds like they put some effort into the musicbut it doesn't really fit the movieand isn't all that good.

The Bad:

--Terrible, terrible acting.

--Another slasher let-down with sexy womennone of them removing clothing. When did that cease being a staple of low-brow slashers??

--Ridiculous story.

--The scarecrow vomits up one-liners that would make Freddy Krueger and Arnold Swartzenegger blush.

--Standard underlying love story goes nowhere, and is poorly done.

--Some of the people killed seem like they were chosen at randomyou never really know who anybody is and then they're killed. And you only assume that they must've had it coming.

The Ugly:

--Extremely average slasher fare, just with a murdering scarecrow instead of well, all that other crap.

--Nowhere near as interesting as Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees, Pinhead, Chucky, or even Angela from the "Sleepaway Camp" seriesall of which are better than this atrocity.

--The absolute worst dialogue I have ever heard in my LIFE. The script is laden with a level of retardedness that I never imagined could exist. I'm serious hereit's a full step beyond terrible. Don't get me wrong, though, it's funny as hellbut I've never heard more asinine bantereven in "Slumber Party Massacre III." This film makes "Jason X" look like Shakespeare.

--The man who kills the boy that becomes the scarecrow: Worst wig ever. Dialogue to match.

Memorable Scene:

--The one where elementary-school youths spew out their own witty dialogue: "Hey, let's go find small animals to torture. Huh huh."

Acting: 3/10 Story: 3/10 Atmosphere: 2/10 Cinematography: 1/10 Character Development: 2/10 Special Effects/Make-up: 5/10 Nudity/Sexuality: 1/10 (No nudity, Mom's a whore, girls wear no bras) Violence/Gore: 5/10 (Low quality, mediocre amount) Dialogue: 0/10 (Extremely ridiculous, blatant, over-the-top and painfully funnyso bad it's good. My first rating for dialogue in any film!) Music: 5/10 Direction: 2/10

Cheesiness: 10/10 Crappiness: 9/10

Overall: 3/10

Another one for just people like me who enjoy watching pure crap. Or Slasher-film completists. This is not a good movie, at all. Laughable dialogue and characters keep it from being truly boring.

www.ResidentHazard.com
+++++++++
A: negative

Problem: This review is like what?

Review:My title above says it all. Let me make it clearer. If you have seen the BBC's "Planet Earth" , which I am sure most of you have , then you are not gonna like this movie too much. And I own all the discs of "Planet Earth" I had seen the rating for this movie very high , and read good reviews about it. I was excited to check it out.

Alas, I went to the theater and the movie started , I saw it was a Disney movie with production companies listing BBC and Discovery. And when they started the first scenes about the polar bear, I recognized them from my DVDs at home of "Planet Earth".

The movie continued and went on and on and on , me and my friends kept on recognizing the scenes were all from "Planet Earth".

We were very very disappointed , as I think 90% of the footage is from "Planet Earth" . I am saying 90% , because some of the scenes I didn't recognize. I have a feeling that I simply didn't remember them.

So finally what this movie really is , is a compilation of different footages from the different discs of "Planet Earth" , with a narration aimed at kids. Yes, the narration is quite kiddish. Let me give you an example. When they show the polar cubs walking away from the mother cub , the narrator says "The polar cubs are not like human kids. They don't always listen to their mothers" ( I don't remember the exact words , but this is how it is ) So in a nutshell. This is condensed "Planet Earth" for kids !
+++++++++
A:
negative