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Some people may react aggressively to certain situations or behave badly after a bad day. In such a situation, their hostility is being delivered to anyone in their path, and has nothing to do with you. When people act aggressive, often it has nothing to do with you. Maybe they're... Having a bad day Having had to deal with a difficult person before Being reminded of a situation that upset them Not able to manage anger, fear, or other emotions well They might tease or insult everyone they meet. Some people are just antagonistic like that. Ask yourself: How does this person interact with other people? Does this person act like this with everyone (or almost everyone)? What is the content of their speech, as opposed to the tone? Could they feel threatened by you in some way? If so, don't feel bad for being your awesome self. Think about how you can help this person feel better about themselves. Give this person a compliment if possible, or ask them if they'd like to talk about anything. Keep in mind that the other person may have poor communication and emotional management skills. Some individuals do not learn how to communicate effectively or how to express and manage their emotions. This is important to remember because it helps you be patient and sympathize, much the same way you would with a young child who hasn't yet learned to regulate and express their emotions. Imagine that there's an inner child acting out, because the person hasn't learned how to deal with problems in a mature way. It's much easier to be patient and feel compassionate when you visualize a learning child at the helm of their behavior. Some people lack or have a different set of social skills and norms. Sometimes a person can come across awkward or maybe even a bit rude, when they do not mean to. Some individuals act a certain way and lack the awareness of how their behaviors are being received. It is not a cold or rude behavior directed at you. For example, someone from a different culture that is a bit more reserved may come across as cold or aloof. People with certain disabilities, such as autism or intellectual disabilities, may not be aware of certain social cues or speech inflections. They may come across as insensitive or rude when they do not mean to be. Some people may not realize their "joking" behavior is not being well received by others. Constructive criticism is a suggestion intended to help you. It is not a critique or criticism of your self-worth or character. For the person giving the criticism, it is easy to point out places in need of polishing. But sometimes we forget to mention how much someone is shining. Constructive criticism should have clear and specific ways in which to improve. This is opposed to non-constructive criticism, which may just be a negative remark that offers no ways of improving. Not constructive: "The article is sloppy and poorly referenced. The second topic is lacking in substance." (This comment offers no methods for improving.) Constructive: "The article you wrote needs to have a few more references and an expansion of the second topic. Other than that, this looks good." Definitely not constructive: "This is a terribly written article." It can be hurtful to hear criticism that is not constructive. Think again about this person's skills in managing their emotions and interacting with others. When you hear criticism, especially when you don't hear constructive remarks within that criticism, ask the person what they mean. This shows them that you value their opinions and is a tactful way to improve their ability to give constructive criticism. For example, if your boss says, "This is a terribly written article," you can follow up by asking, "I'd like to hear more details about what you don't like about the article. Let's work together to improve it."
Take someone's emotions into account. Look at how the person treats others. Consider the person's insecurities. Consider the other person's emotional management skills. Recognize the other person's background. Identify whether criticism is constructive. Ask questions when you receive criticism.