Problem: Write a negative movie review.

Answer: I am not a big fan of horror films, and have only seen a handful of them (and none of the "Halloween"s or "Friday the Thirteenth"s) - but I can appreciate a frightening horror film not because of gore. And I'm pretty sure this isn't scary.

What's so spooky about a little plastic skull that pops up everywhere? In all of its appearances there are faraway establishing shots, so there's no real surprise in any of this film. (Not that a skull in of itself is that scary anyway, but . . .)

The plot concerns Claus Von Bulow's third cousin (John Hudson), who marries a Donna-reed look-a-like (Peggey Webber, giving one of the worst performances ever) who begins seeing skulls and hearing the mysterious screams of a group of peacocks on her husband's mansion. Did I mention that her husband lost her first wife in a mysterious drowning incident? OOOOH!!!! Wonder who did it!!!!

This is the same old plot about a rich boy trying to kill and/or drive their wife insane. If you want to see a well-done version of this stuff, try "Reversal of Fortune". And BTW, Jeremy Irons is one hundred times more talented than John Hudson.

The MSTing was okay but nothing special; paired with the "Gumby" short, however, it makes for good viewing.

Two stars for "The Screaming Skull"; eight stars for the MST3K version.

And now, to paraphrase Mr. Von Bulow himself: "How bad is this film?" "You have no idea!"

Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer: Lapyuta (Castle in the Sky), more than any of Hayao Miyazaki's movies, brings the joy of storytelling to the audience. It is the kind of movie that makes one feel like a kid again; it's just magical. It's a crime that it took this long for it to be released in the states, but now that it's here check it out! And stick with the original language; the dub changed my impressions of the characters somewhat, which is something that should be avoided at all costs in a translation of a movie (or book, whatever.)

I give it a ten/ten.

Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer: I remember seeing this movie shown several years ago on the Lifetime TV network and thought it was an interesting story. Several years later I see it again and fall head over heels in love with this movie. The story behind the movie is fascinating in and of itself. The cast just makes it that much more appealing. Meryl Streep is definitely at the top of her game in this picture. She nails Mrs. Chamberlain's mannerisms, the accent, and even look. She shows the pain, hurt, surprise, and anger that Lindy had to endure, and in the process it's hard to remember that it ISN'T Lindy. In my opinion, this performance of Meryl's was better than her Oscar-winning turn in "Sophie's Choice", and should have garnered her her third Oscar. Sam Neill is perfect as Michael Chamberlain, and for some surprising reason, wasn't recognized by the Academy with at least a nomination. In all, this movie only receive ONE Oscar nod (Streep's for Best Actress.) However, it did receive several Australian Oscars and nominations.

Definitely a top-rate movie: it tells a great story and you get great performances from the entire cast.

Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer:
I always said that the animated Batman movies were much better than the live action films.

I've seen all of the animated films, but out of the bunch, this is the poorest, and it's rather disappointing.

"Mask of the Phantasm" would rank as the best, then "World's Finest", then "Sub Zero", then "Return of the Joker", and finally this ranks last.

In this newest animated movie, there's a mysterious new batgirl in Gotham and Batman is intent on discovering whether she's friend or foe as she sets out on a quest for vengeance.

But as Bruce gets involved with three young women, he begins investigating them and discovers who is the new batgirl.

The tone in this film is unusually light considering most of the films are grim and bleak, which was rather disappointing. Bruce acts strangely out of character most of the time, the villains are re-used from the last films, and while the action scenes are exciting, they're really nothing new. It also lacks the dramatic impact the other films have, especially that of "Sub-Zero" which was heavy in drama and character development.

Everything in the film feels pretty recycled and the supporting characters are charming but no one is actually worth rooting for.

All the while, I really enjoyed this, I had a blast, and the identity of the new batgirl is surprising, but this wasn't as exciting as I'd hoped.

(**half out of ****)