QUES: It would be altogether unfair to ask him to surrender this valuable privilege for anything less than what it might bring him in case he should be allowed to keep it

correct the punctuation.

CORRECTED: It would be altogether unfair to ask him to surrender this valuable privilege for anything less than what it might bring him in case he should be allowed to keep it.

QUES: If you dont want Analytics to be used in your browser you can install the Google Analytics browser addon Learn more about Google Analytics and privacy

correct the punctuation.

CORRECTED: If you don't want Analytics to be used in your browser, you can install the Google Analytics browser add-on. Learn more about Google Analytics and privacy.

QUES: And it helped me move in consciousness from feeling I was a victim of outside circumstances to understanding the part I played in creating my own life experiences

correct the punctuation.

CORRECTED:
And it helped me move (in consciousness) from feeling I was a victim of outside circumstances to understanding the part I played in creating my own life experiences.