Summarize the following:
If you are getting upset with a parent, take a time-out. Politely excuse yourself and walk into another room or outside for a breath of fresh air. Do some deep breathing exercises to stimulate your body's natural stress relief response. Inhale through your nose for 4 counts. Hold it for 7 counts. Then, exhale the air through your mouth for 8 counts. Repeat this technique until you start to feel calm again. Be respectful and use language that minimizes your chances of offending your parent(s) and getting into trouble. If you use statements that start with "you," they can seem argumentative. "I" statements give you the chance to express how you feel and respectfully disagree with your mom and/or dad. Try this: "I feel mistrusted when you follow me in the car. I try my best to follow the rules, but it doesn't help if you don't try to trust me." Or, "I'm feeling really pressured about having to go to your alma mater for college. Can I have more time to think this over?" One of the main reasons why you may fight with your parents is the neither of you feels heard. If, by this point, you have been allowed to express yourself, return the favor by listening to their points-of-view as well. Refrain from using any sarcasm when something is said that you don't like or agree with. Follow these tips to listen effectively: Put away any distractions, such as turning off phones or TVs Turn to face your parent(s) and make occasional eye contact Reflect open body language by uncrossing your arms and legs and leaning toward the speaker Wait until the speaker is done before replying Make clarifications by asking questions to ensure that you got the correct message If you're a teen who finds yourself arguing with your parents, you may feel as if you are at war. No matter how difficult your relationship is with your parents and how rarely you see eye-to-eye, they love you and probably have your best interests at heart. Although it may feel as though you are on different sides, they just want the best for you.
Keep your cool. Use "I" statements. Practice active listening. Remember that they love you.