Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer: Paris, je t'aime (2006) is a film made up of 18 segments. You can do the math--18 segments in 120 minutes means each director had seven minutes to tell her or his story. The movie is based on the premise that you can, indeed, tell a story in that short amount of time. The premise works. Almost all of the segments are powerful, complete, and satisfying. Each presents a different aspect of the Parisian experience, and almost every director draws forth outstanding performances from a cast of great and near-great actors.

There were so many powerful portrayals in this film that it's hard to pick one or two favorites. Probably the most memorable to me were Juliette Binoche as a grieving mother in the segment "Place des Victoires," Gena Rowlands as an aging beauty in "Quartier Latin," Catalina Sandino Moreno as a maid in the segment "Loin du 16eme" and Margo Martindale as a Colorado mail carrier who has learned to speak French so she can visit Paris ("14eme Arrondissement" segment).

Special mention must be given to Gulliver Hecq, probably the meanest little boy to ever harass an American tourist in a Parisian Metro Station (segment "Tuileries").

This is an outstanding movie. My wife and I decided to rent it in a few months so we can catch some of the subtle points we surely missed. However, Paris is photographed so beautifully that I would suggest that you try to see it on a large screen. In any case, don't miss it!

Problem: Write a positive movie review.

Answer: Some may feel that the rating i have just given is a bit generous, but for what this film is i think the directors have done a good job with that they had available to them, this is also a film a film of an acquired taste!

my immediate thought was the direct connection to the classic cult film 'The Thing' i.e the parasitical aliens from outta space, infesting human host to then reek havoc wherever possible!

You can see how this film pays homage to such a film and others of the horror/gore genre, however cleverly maintains its own originality, well these things fight each other for one and then continue to eat then fallen rival! Only killing and picking a human when it needs a new host! To then pick another fight with another infected host! And this film even throws in a love story but i wont say no more otherwise it gives too much away.

GREAT! But like i said of an acquired taste, so don't be surprised if you don't like the film. It is low budget and yes it is blood thirsty, with the creatures/aliens/things morphing their limbs into crude looking weapons, i.e saws, drills, blades and even the odd gun to all but decimate there opponent. I found myself cringing at what i was being shown but at the same time glued to the screen wondering what was going to happen next!

So if you like gore, you like aliens, you like fighting and even maybe a little bit of love thrown in somewhere, then i must recommend this film as a must see. I just wish i came across this earlier then i did!

Problem: Write a negative movie review.

Answer: If you are the sort of person who can get a kick out of a very bad movie, then I highly recommend this one. If you aren't, stay away. This is an astonishingly cheap-looking movie, and at times you may find yourself wondering if it isn't just a prank someone is pulling on you. The most positive comment I can make about it is that the people responsible seemed to realize that it was super-low-budget nonsense, so there is at least a sense of fun here.

But this is as amateurish as it gets. Their idea of giant killer mushrooms are simply guys covered with beige colored sheets with what looks like trash can covers on their heads. It's obviously not meant to be taken seriously (to say the least), but even with that disclaimer you'll find yourself shaking your head at the awesome cheesiness of it all. Or laughing out loud frequently, as I did.

Problem: Write a negative movie review.

Answer:
I argued with myself whether to rent this or not. I'm always afraid of renting something I've never heard of (don't remember this being in theaters). Great cast...that's what tipped the scales. 30 minutes in, I almost stopped watching it. The first few minutes are fun to watch, but unbelievable. It only gets worse after that. The writers of this movie could do a little research on future projects if they want to make their movies even a little better. Or they could just try writing something just a little bit believable. I give it a 3....a 1 for the writing (only because there are words)and a 2 for being able to get so many good actors to agree to do this movie despite having to read the script. Oh my god this movie sucks.