Problem: Write a negative yelp review.
A: My husband and I decided to have a date night this past Saturday. We decided on a movie at the Galaxy theatre so it made sense to find a dining option nearby. After searching Yelp for restaurants in the vicinity, I found a deal listed for Bertolucci on Living Social and since my hubby has never dined at a Brazilian steakhouse, I decided to give it a shot. The location is a bit hidden if you are not familiar with the area (it is in the parking lot of the 24 hour fitness). We arrived for our 6PM reservation and were seated promptly. As other diners have stated, the salad bar is small but decent. My husband really liked the frejoida and we both liked the cheese balls as well as the flan. The fired bananas were just okay. I prefer how Texas de Brazil brings them to you table. The rest of the salad bar was really just a typical salad bar. Our deal from living social included two glasses of house wine and since neither of us drink, we ordered two diet sodas. We were told we could each have one can. Uh, okay...we weren't worried about money so that statement was a little off-putting but no big deal. I did take the statement to insinuate that the first two sodas would be in lieu of the wine that we did not want. We did both find it a little tacky to be served a can at a restaurant that seems to have a stocked bar but who knows? Through the dinner, we did order one more can. On to the meat...the meat was all pretty good. Our favorite wound up being the bacon wrapped chicken. The meat came around sporadically which is most likely attributed to the small staff but the gauchos were both very friendly and personable. Some of the meat came out flaming hot and some luke warm. We had instances of empty plates while waiting for them to visit our table again and the amounts served at each time were a bite or two at the most. I ended up going back to the salad bar to find something to eat and found the rolls which were good however there was no butter so we just used olive oil with pepper. If you choose this restaurant, you have likely dined at Fogo or Texas so the bread will disappoint as well as the swiftness of the meat delivery and salad bar. At the end of our meal, my husband thought a cup of coffee would compliment the flan nicely. We waited for a bit for someone to come by however other than the gauchos who are busy running from table to table, we found there was minimal attentiveness for any other needs such as water refill or plate removal. He finally went to the bar and asked for two cups of coffee and the bill when it was ready. Our coffee was brought to the table as well as the bill. The bill included an initial charge of $5.00 for the first two cans of soda, $3.00 for the third can of soda, $6.00 for the two cups of coffee and the tax. This was a date night for us so it wasn't a big deal however I am a little surprised our two initials sodas cost us $5.00 ($2.50 each) since we opted not to have wine, and the third can of soda was $3.00. All in all the experience was just okay. The decor is nonchalant and better suited towards an Italian restaurant. There are tea lights on the tables but they are not lit. The food was okay. The service is hard to rate. The gauchos were friendly and in my opinion, doing the best they could but ultimately there was no real attentiveness elsewhere. As far as Brazilian steakhouses go, I would recommend Fogo de Chao or Texas De Brazil. Ultimately we spent roughly the same amount of money but do not feel the value or the ambiance is in par with other choices.

Problem: Write a negative yelp review.
A: Went here for dinner last night with some friends from out of town. Very dark, which is fine unless you want a good look at your food before you eat it. The only air conditioning they had were 2 portables, which weren't doing the job. It was very hot in the restaurant -- we were all sweaty by the time we got our food. Uncomfortable. I was expecting somewhat of a speakeasy experience -- didn't get it. Except for the lighting and the entrance (you walk into a lobby then ring a bell to get seated), there were no dramatics here. Maybe the staff was too hot to do their spiel. Food was ok, nothing spectacular. They claimed the lasagna was full of sausage and hamburger meat -- there was about 3 small chunks of sausage, the rest was ricotta cheese and sauce. Not enough to have any leftovers, which I thought was cheap for the prices they charge. Overall, it was a little below average. I won't be back.

Problem: Write a negative yelp review.
A:
Watch out. This bank charges $14 per month for not maintaining a $10,000 balance.