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Being in a wheelchair does not mean the person is paralyzed or incapable of taking a few steps. Some people only use wheelchairs because they cannot stand for extended periods, or have a walking restriction problem. Often, people with heart conditions will use wheelchairs to avoid overexertion. If you are curious about why a person is using a wheelchair, it's better to ask than to assume. Consider adding a qualifier to the beginning of the question, so the person can easily decline if they feel uncomfortable. For example, "Do you mind my asking why you use a wheelchair?" Only ask a wheelchair user why they use a wheelchair after you've become familiar. This question is not appropriate from strangers. If a person using a wheelchair is accompanied by someone else, involve that person in the conversation also, but not in place of the person using the wheelchair. For example, do not direct questions about the person using the wheelchair to the person accompanying them. When in a long conversation with someone in a chair, sit down. It is very tiring--even painful--for a person in a wheelchair to have to stare up at you. Patting or leaning on the chair may be interpreted as disrespectful. The person may be using a wheelchair because of an injury, so your touch may be painful in addition to patronizing. Equally, do not touch the person in any way. Treat a wheelchair as an extension of a person's body. If you wouldn't put your hand on that person's shoulder, then don't put your hand on their wheelchair unnecessarily. Always respect a wheelchair user's personal space.
Avoid making presumptions about others' abilities. Speak directly to a person using a wheelchair. Ask permission before touching the person or their wheelchair.