Definition: You are given a review about a place. You need to provide a rating from "1 star" to "5 stars" for this place.
Input: I came in here for a coffee, and something to eat, having infrequently enjoyed some of the company's other efforts: Sofi's and Bar Boda.

The space feels lovely and airy upon entering, with nice relaxing music on the stereo. Fantastically individual atmosphere with birdcages hanging from the ceiling and interesting artwork adorning the walls. Staff seem friendly enough, if a bit impersonal; I ordered my black coffee at the bar, was given a menu (bound in a hardback copy of Disney's Beauty & the Beast no-less), and took my seat.

Coffee is from Artisan Roast on Broughton St, so I wasn't surprised to taste a superbly balanced cup. Marvellous.

I ordered the burger to eat. Extras such as cheese and bacon are available on the menu from 0.50 to 1, but I ordered it 'as it comes'. No mention of accompanying fries or potato wedges is made on the menu so I held my breath. I thought "Surely for 8, I'll get fries AND a cherry on top!".

I got out my laptop to do some work while I waited. The free wifi worked for a few minutes before chucking me off and ceasing to function.

My burger arrived accompanied by small, but lovely, rocket, tomato and olive salad. Fresh leaves and nicely dressed.

Besides the salad, there was nothing else on the plate apart from a hearty looking bun containing a burger, and a few wilting leaves.

No fries, no onion, no cherry on top!

"Oh well", I thought, "the burger must taste excellent, surely, with an 8 price tag!". To my disgust, the first bite revealed a barely cooked chunk of mincemeat.

Now I love my burger on the pink side, but this was a step too far.

At the second time of asking, my burger arrived and I ate, but it felt overcooked and tough this time. Perhaps finished in the microwave, to ensure no more raw meat mishaps? Who knows.

When I finished eating, I sat in front of the empty plate for fifteen minutes before I left. Surely 'good service' stops when your guests leave your establishment, not when you've just messed up their order and they're sitting at one of your tables!

I've eaten many vastly superior burgers in my days and paid less for the pleasure. The cheaper burgers all came with fries too!

Still waiting for a cherry on top though.

I probably wouldn't go back to this bar, certainly not to eat anyway. All in all, a crushing disappointment. Especially on a quiet Thursday afternoon.

High point - fantastic coffee from Artisan roast, tasty rocket with the burger.

Low point - leaving the place with that same bitter taste in the mouth you get when you've been mugged in broad daylight in a dodgy bar.
Output:
2 stars