Problem: Write a negative (OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive) movie review.

Answer: I tried watching this abomination of the cinema when I was five years old; I have never been the same since. Filled to the brim with drug-induced images that reek of the common ravings of your average asylum resident, this "movie", despite its colorful appearance, is not for humans, ESPECIALLY not children.

It starts out innocently enough with a poor boy who ruins his classmate's drum by (wait for it) putting his head through it; yes, putting his HEAD through it. But fear not, my friends! He is quickly consoled by his chirping flute, which is weird enough, I'll grant you, but still acceptable.

THEN: The movie morphs into a combination of Wizard of Oz and Where the Wild Things Are, but loses all the "warm and fuzzy" aspects of either of these two books.

So, this seven-foot yellow relative of Barney, befriends this poor boy and plunges him even deeper into despair.

And, to add the pleasant array of horrific themes, a carnivorous boat, formerly a friend of the motley crew of hobbling grandfather clocks and doped-up "dragons", is added to the mix of mayhem.

The most comforting image in the midst of this chaos is the villain, aptly dubbed "Witchiepoo" (?). Of course, she has problems of her own: what with an obvious plastic mask constricting her facial expressions to having to deal with a broomstick whose gas level always seemed to be at its lowest at the most inopportune moments. As a result of this, one of her favorite pastimes was nose-diving into the body of water that separated the land of Pufnstuf from her degenerate, decaying abode (I don't know where I would have preferred to live).

In summary, this movie is terrifying...

If you want to watch the movie that has similar effects on its audience as The Exorcist, then this one is for you. Enjoy.

Problem: Write a positive (OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive) movie review.

Answer: Mystery Men is one of those movies that gets funnier over time. There is a naive innocence and "niceness" to the characters. It has become part of our family "culture," and we quote the characters often. It is my favorite film of the last two years. My kids are 13 and 11 and we all three love this film. Great acting and comedy. We love Galaxy Quest and Monty Python flicks too. Okay, we're not talking intellectual here, just Family bonding!

Problem: Write a negative (OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive) movie review.

Answer: This is a wonderfully goofy example of a self produced, written and directed vanity project ...while I was working as a crew member John Carradine commented to me (before the burning at the stake sequence): "This is the worst piece of sh*t I've ever worked on ...and I've worked on a lot of pieces of sh*t." Also An interesting moment earlier when Jim Mitchum was having trouble with his lines and started cursing in the courtyard location of the Santuario (a religious shrine in Chimayo) - at which point one of the local "vato loco" low-rider onlookers growled "...show some respect man", which apparently caused Jim to remember where he was, as he then made a very profound and heartfelt apology for his inappropriate behavior. In any case the crew did the job on deferment and were never fully paid - but came away with plenty of particularly bizarre stories - like the night we caught the producer/director's 10 year old son entertaining himself by constructing miniature Burmese tiger traps for us to break our legs in. Like they say: "Ya gotta' love the Biz..."

Problem: Write a positive (OPTIONS:
- negative
- positive) movie review.

Answer:
Along with "Brothers & Sisters", "Six Degrees" was one of my favorite new dramas of fall 2006.

Great cast all around, but really enjoyed the work of Campbell Scott (the come-back photog) and Hope Davis (recent widow of journalist killed in Iraq).

Aside from the acting, the writing was fresh and the acting superb. The show was also shot in NYC, the real city, not the Warner Bros. or some other studio's backlot, adding a secondary layer or realism.

I guess people are more interested in the latest "Survivor" and other reality garbage. Too bad it didn't last.