Problem: Purchased botox coupon on social media site and not at all satisfied - even returned for touch up with no results...makes you wonder and question if syringe was saline or botox. I would not recommend or return for services.
How would this review be described?
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A: negative

Problem: This fuckery deserves nothing more than a list of reasons why it sucks. Here goes: 1. Line - Girl.Please. I am not trying to stand in a line 376 people deep only to get herded into another line with even more people. Either let customers in or don't. What's the hold up? Not to mention the line gets held up once again because you get crammed into an elevator to get to the actual club area. (Clubs that require elevators deserve their own rant. Such a mess). 2. The "Clientele" - So-Cal college kids on spring/summer break. i.e. Girls in cheap Wet Seal freakum dresses and tired "hidden pump" heels and douchey "bros" in whatever they think makes them look rich. Basically giant groups of people who have no business pretending to be wealthy cause we all know they're staying 6 to a room at the giant cigarette known as Circus Circus. 3. The Stairs - This place is where they should shoot the next P90X video cause you will burn at least half of your muffin top off while trying to maneuver the chaos that is the floorplan. There are a few different dance floors, each one playing a different genre of music, which is cool. However, you have to climb up and down flights of stairs to get to each different section of the club. Drunks in heels + stairs = liability insurance nightmare. Also, traffic jams and feet being stepped on by said drunks in heels. 4. The Vibe - People don't come here to dance, they come here to feel cool. If you enjoy walking in circles through a club that's too small and too crowded, this is your place. People just stand around and text and there's very few places to sit or stand without being pushed or knocked in to. It's a hot mess and you're ready to leave in 20 minutes because you are bored and exhausted already. Being a local and a girl, I got in for free. I can't imagine paying to get into this over-hyped catastrophe.
How would this review be described?
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A: negative

Problem: Me and the other homies in the hood were quite delighted when we learned (a few years ago) that the old gas station on this corner was being replaced with an El Pollo. Why? Because there aren't enough Mexican fast food places in this neck of the woods? Hardly. Because it's a healthier, tasty alternative to the usual fried stuff? Maybe, but you can trot into pretty much any grocery store and grab a rotisserie chicken, a tub of salsa and a pack of tortillas. You'll have a lot more of basically the same food for a lot less dinero. No, kids, we were delighted because of the flan. And anyone who knows flan knows that, for whatever mysterious, inexplicable reason, EPL has the best flan anywhere. Make that HAD. Drove on thru a couple of days ago, put in my order for whatever I had a coupon for, and added on a request for my favorite dessert, only to be told "I'm sorry. We don't have flan anymore". Wha wha WHAT?? "You mean, you ran out"? "No. We don't have it anymore". I am still in shock. What corporate dumbass made the decision to eliminate the best thing on the menu? What's next? Those greasy little deep fried tacos at Jack in the Box? Only reason they got any stars was because the guy working the window agreed with me wholeheartedly. It was his only reason for going to work each day. Don't worry, bro. They will probably lose enough customers now that you will have to find another job anyway.
How would this review be described?
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A: negative

Problem: So we finally ate here. The decor has not been updated since about 1967, and we were surrounded by overweight senior citizens reeking of cigarette smoke. The food was reminiscent of middle school cafeteria fare. The waitresses were very friendly, and the prices were not bad. We were obviously not the target demographic, though. Won't be back. Too bad, because we can walk there...
How would this review be described?
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A:
negative