Being a good friend and showing you care starts with being a good listener. Listening to your friend discuss their problems or concerns is a great way to show that you care about them and what they are going through. Being listened to helps people to vent their frustrations, share their feelings, and feel validated and important. Show you are listening by maintaining eye contact and interested body posture such as leaning forward. Every once and awhile reflect or repeat back what your friend has told you to show you are listening and make sure you are hearing correctly. Try not to interrupt your friend while they are talking. Sometimes it can be difficult to come out and tell someone you care. Think about how nice it is for you to hear that someone cares about you. Make sure you are making the time to tell your friends just how much they mean to you. If there is something that is concerning you about your friend, talk to them about it as well. Try saying something like the following. "Hey, just so you know, I'm here for you if you need anything." "I hope you know that you are important to me and I care about you." "Whatever you are going through, I'm here if you need me." Make your friendship one of unconditional positive regard, meaning that you accept and respect them just the way they are. Try not to point out mistakes in your friend, especially if they're distressed. That will only make matters worse and your care might be taken as criticism. In addition to avoiding judgments, you should support them during difficult times or in efforts to change or improve. Show them you care by providing supportive suggestions if they ask. Apologizing is an essential aspect of showing someone you care. Even if you are not at fault you can still apologize to your friend. If it is an argument between the two of you, think about what is more valuable to you. Is your need to win the argument or your friendship more important? Apologizing shows your friend you care about your relationship and that they are more important to you than an argument. It can be difficult to show your friend that you care if you cannot be true to your word. If you go back on your word your friend is going to get the message that they are not important enough for you to keep a promise to, and that can cause damage to your relationship. Consider the importance of keeping your word in the following situations. If you agree to do something or be somewhere, make sure you stick to your word. If your friend is relying on you for something, make sure you are there for them. If you make a promise, keep it. It can be really easy for you to get wrapped up in your own life, between school, work, and/or family. But taking the time for a quick phone call or a sweet text message is a great way to maintain contact. This is especially important for friends who are not local. For example, you could draft a text that says. "Hey! We've been super busy this week, but I wanted to let you know that I'm thinking about you. Call you this weekend!" Or, you could call them while you're walking between classes and leave a quick voicemail saying that you'll call back at another time, but you miss them and are excited to talk with them again.

Summary: Be a good listener. Tell them you care. Avoid judgments and arguments. Apologize. Keep your word. Keep in contact with them.

During your separation, it is good to meet new people. This can lead to filling those hours that you previously spent with your partner. While this is not technically dating, it is the beginnings of becoming available to date. Some ways to meet new people include: Volunteering for issues that interest you, such as museums or animal shelters Taking classes for things you enjoy, such as cooking, writing, or a sport Starting or joining a club or organization, such as a book club or a religious organization. A local church or community center may even have a single parents' group. Going out in groups is not technically dating, even though those groups often are comprised of couples. Going with groups of people to events, including movies, restaurants, and sporting events is a good way to socialize while your divorce is pending. It is also a good way to get to know the other person without the stress of a formal date in the background. Almost any activity that can be done one-on-one can also be done with a group of people. Consider such activities as: Going hiking with a mixed-gender group of friends Seeing a play or movie with a mixed-gender group of friends. Going to the beach or park with a mixed-gender group of friends. If you do decide to go out on a paired-off date while separated, exercise discretion. This does not mean be secretive, but you don't want to throw it in your former partner's face, either, especially if s/he is having difficulty dealing with the breakup. Don't change your Facebook status to reflect any new relationships. Don't announce dates on social media. Don't talk about your dates in front of your children or friends who are also friends of your former spouse. If you are still married, the potential date has the right to know this. Only with this information can that person make an informed decision about whether s/he wants to be involved with the stress that is usually involved in this stage of your life. Often, people feel betrayed if they learn that information has been withheld from them. Once you start dating, your partner(s) could potentially find themselves involved in your case against their will. Some people feel it is morally wrong to date others before the divorce is final.
Summary: Meet new people. Do things in groups. Exercise discretion. Consider telling potential dates your true marital status.