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If you're in a stressful situation, be alert to thoughts that hint that you might be getting impatient, such as "This is taking forever," or "This person is being so annoying." When you pick up on these impatient thoughts, stop and check in with your body to see what you're feeling, physically. You'll probably be able to recognize signs of impatience right away, and identifying them can help you start to counteract your frustration. Some physical signs could include: Tension in your muscles Restless, jiggling feet or legs Clenching your hands Short breaths An elevated heart rate Irritability or anger Once you've recognized that you're feeling impatient, it's time to hunt down the cause. Think past your immediate frustration and ask yourself, "Why am I actually feeling this way?" Some common causes of impatience are: Your environment not conforming to your expectations. For example, you might hit unexpected traffic, or a restaurant might be more crowded than you'd thought, making you feel irritated and frustrated. Other people not behaving the way you want them to. For instance, you might get impatient that someone in front of you at the grocery store is blocking the whole aisle or chatting with the clerk for too long. When you can't master a new skill fast enough. You might get impatient, for example, if you can't figure out a new math or computer concept. You may have an unrealistic expectation that you will quickly grasp all new concepts. When you can't control your thoughts. You might get impatient with yourself for not being able to dictate what emotions and thoughts pop up in your mind, even if you recognize there's not much you can do to stop it. Taking small, easy actions can break up the cycle of your impatience before it can progress, giving you a chance to regroup yourself. Focus on your movements and the physical sensations of your actions, which will distract you from your impatience. One good way to ground yourself is to focus on your environment. For example, you might take a few moments to think about how your feet feel when you are standing on the floor, what it feels like to sit in a chair, or the sensation of an object in your hand. You can also try a simple grounding exercise like looking for 3 things in your environment that are blue. These simple actions help bring you back into the present moment. Close your eyes and inhale deeply into your belly. Hold it for a second, the let the air out slowly. Feel your body calm down and let that physical relaxation flow into your mind, soothing your impatient thoughts. Besides calming your body, taking a few deep breaths will force you to slow down before you say or do anything rash. Most situations that make you feel impatient are ones that can't easily be changed (if there was an easy solution, you probably would have found it already!). Instead of focusing on this feeling of powerlessness, concentrate on what can be changed: your attitude and perspective of the situation. Say to yourself, "Since I can't remove myself completely from this situation, how can I make it better?" If you're frustrated with an essay you're writing, for example, you could focus on making your environment more pleasant. Put on music that helps you concentrate, make some tea, or have a snack. You could also address head-on what's really bothering you about the situation, such as the fact that the essay is taking a long time to write. For example, you could cover up your clock so you don't feel a time crunch. If you can't change your situation, the best thing you can do is change your perspective on it. Ask yourself to find something positive about where you are right now and focus on that instead of your impatience. It might be hard at first--like a lot of negative emotions, impatience can make you feel good and powerful in the moment--but forcing yourself to focus on the positive will make you feel much better in the long run. If you're stuck in traffic, for example, chat with another person in the car or, if your car has a Bluetooth capability, call a friend or family member. Change the radio station or put in a new CD and sing along. If you are stuck in a tedious or frustrating situation, try making productive use of your time. For example, if you're driving, listen to an interesting audiobook. If you have to sit in a doctor's office for a long time, try to bring a project with you to work on.
Pick up on the thoughts and physical feelings of being impatient. Figure out what's causing your impatience. Take a moment to ground yourself. Take 5 deep breaths to slow your heart rate down. Shift your perspective about your situation if you can. Find something good or interesting in the situation if you can.