Problem: Write an article based on this summary: Be relaxed in your emotions and sense of self. Be self-assured in who you are and what you do. Walk the walk. Talk the talk.

Answer: Uptight is the opposite of cool. It projects fear, worry, concern, while cool is a state of being easy. You might have worries, but it's not in your eyes or in your smile. You are at ease with where you are in life and it's evident by how you navigate through life and your social circle. Be level-headed and present and coolness follows effortlessly. Not needing to require validation from others is essential to looking cool. You can go places and make decisions without considering other people's opinions or allowing them to hold a great weight in their life influences. You seek validation from within yourself and it's obvious in the way you don't need or cling to people even if you are a sociable outgoing person. Looking cool is about projecting cool. Walk with your shoulders back and head held high with grace and confidence being the goal with how you hold your posture. Shift your center of gravity and poise yourself to walk like a model. Always walk as if someone is taking your picture from a distance. Great posture not only shows others your confidence and cool, but it also works wonders on how you perceive yourself as well. Speak knowingly on an array of subjects. Have a sense of humor about everything, laugh at your antics, and make jokes about other things. Don't take yourself too seriously. Be open to listening to people and their problems while being responsive and advising in their times of need. Allow people to use you as a confidant. You become more interesting the more you are interested in other people. Be genuine in your interactions with other people Listen actively by being present in the conversation versus thinking of what to say next Be interested and introspective in the questions you ask to get to know people Find commonalities Don't be afraid to offer new insight through your conversation Appreciate your qualities!

Problem: Write an article based on this summary: Release your hope for him. Grieve. Evaluate his behavior and your own. Remind yourself of things you didn't like about him.

Answer: Giving up on something you want can be frightening, but actually doing so can be a relief. Unconsciously, you've been motivated to pursue himhe's been your goal. Make a conscious decision to no longer pursue him. It may help to write this down, to tell a friend, or even to hold a small ceremony for yourself. Consider gathering things you have that make you think of him and putting them in a box, throwing them away, or giving them away. Once your private space is cleared of reminders, consider holding a small cleansing ceremony. Burn some sage incense and walk through your room or your home. When a wish for him comes up, don't suppress it and don't cling to it. Acknowledge how you feel, but remind yourself that you are choosing to move on. Don't push away feelings of sadness when they come. It's totally natural and healthy to be sad when you have feelings for someone and it doesn't work out. Take a week or a few weeks to grieve. Cry if you can: if your feelings are hurt, you are actually hurt, and you will do better to acknowledge it. Crying can be extremely therapeutic. Listen to music that lets you feel your feelings. Exercise. It helps to clear your mind and you will be healthier. Write in a diary if you have one. Write a letter to him if you want. Keep it for a week or two before you give it to him, or don't give it to him at all. The point is to get your feelings out. Go on some long walks by yourself. You'll have time to think, and you'll feel better for the exercise. Know when to stop. If you're dropping the people and projects that matter to you, you're grieving too much. Consult a therapist if you can't get back into your normal life. Did he lead you on, acting like he liked you for attention? Did you pursue him relentlessly even after he let you know that it wasn't going to work? Was everyone honest and considerate, or was bad behavior involved? If you feel like you misbehaved, apologize. If you feel like he did something wrong, and you're friends, consider letting him know that you feel hurt. You can write a brief letter or email if it's too painful to talk to him in person. If you aren't friends, it might feel better to not communicate. Ask yourself what would feel better, and follow that path. Maybe he was totally unadventurous, or maybe he was too much of a risk taker. Maybe he constantly interrupted you. Maybe you were in love with the fantasy of this guy and not the guy himself. It can be hard to see the real person when you're infatuated. You don't have to demonize him, of course. Just take your image of him with a grain of salt. Remember, he was never perfect: you just had some perfect feelings about him.

Problem: Write an article based on this summary: Keep your explanation simple. Think before you speak. Make a positive statement. Be gracious. Show gratitude. Give a clear answer. Offer encouragement.

Answer:
You have the option of not giving a reason or excuse for saying no. Remember, it is your right to decline to do things, and you don't own anyone an explanation. You can simply respond, "no," but if you feel like adding more, you can still be respectful while keeping it simple. You could say, "I'm sorry, that just won't work for me." Another way to say no is simply, "No, I can't do that." If someone asks if they can buy you a drink, feel free to just say, "No, thanks." If you say no immediately, it might seem like you didn't even consider the request. In order to be respectful, take a moment to think about your answer--even if you already know what it is going to be. Take a pause, and then kindly say no. You could say, "Let me check my calendar. I believe I already have a commitment that weekend." Try counting slowly to three before responding. This way, you'll seem to be considering the request. A respectful response is not one that sounds overly negative. When turning someone down, find a way to inject a positive attitude into your words. It also helps if you use a friendly tone of voice! For example, you could say, "Wow! A cookie exchange sounds like such a fun idea! I'm sorry that I won't be able to come. It sounds like I'll be missing a good time." It's important not to sound rude. Don't say something like, "No, why would I want to do that?" Instead, be kind and gracious. Say things like, "That's so nice of you to think of me, but I'm really not interested in learning to snowshoe." You can also say, "I'm afraid I can't dog sit for you. Your puppy is cute, but I don't think my cat would agree." Make it clear that you genuinely appreciate being asked. If you have to turn someone down, express your thanks that they thought of you in the first place. You could say something like, "Thanks for considering me responsible enough to watch your kids. I'm sorry that I'm busy that evening." You can also say, "I appreciate that you think I'd make a good team captain. However, I'm more comfortable not having a leadership role." Saying no respectfully dictates that your be honest and direct. Do not give people false hope that you will be able to fulfill their request. If you can't help, say so. Instead of, "Maybe I can try to make that work," say, "I'm sorry, I have my own presentation to finish. I can't help with yours." If someone is asking you on a date and you don't want to go, make that clear. You can say, "I'm sorry, but I just don't feel a connection. I'm going to have to turn down your offer." You can kindly turn down requests by including some friendly words. Try building the other person's confidence a bit. You can say, "You've been doing great managing your new team. I'm not available to help you run the meeting, but I know you'll be just fine on your own." Maybe one of your friends wants to take your relationship to the next level. Try saying, "I know you're an awesome person. That's why I value you as a friend, and I'd love for things to stay that way."