Write an article based on this "Grant your teen privacy unless you notice signs of trouble. Let them know that you respect their opinions. Encourage them to solve problems and conflicts on their own. Include them in your rule-making process."
Always knock on their door before you enter their room. Don't try to eavesdrop on their phone calls, look over their shoulder when they're texting, or read their emails. Teens need privacy, and healthy boundaries can help you develop a trusting relationship with your child. Respecting their privacy will let your teen know that you trust them and view them as a responsible young adult. Respect their privacy unless you believe their safety is at risk. If you believe they're in danger of harming themselves or others, suspect drug use, or have observed any concerning signs, you have the right and responsibility to identify the problem. Concerning signs may include drastic changes in personality, skipping school, lower grades, extreme or sudden weight changes, or run-ins with the law. Your teen will challenge your authority, and they have the right to disagree with you. Explain that they're allowed to have opinions that differ from yours on matters from current events to house rules. When it comes to discipline, acknowledge that they have a right to disagree, but that doesn't mean they can disregard your rules. For instance, instead of interrupting your teen, allow them to finish speaking. If you're having a disagreement about house rules, tell them, "I respect your opinion, and you have a right to disagree. However, it's my job to look out for your well-being, and going to a party without an adult present is too risky." Teach your teen how to respectfully disagree with someone. It will help improve your relationship as well as make them learn a valuable life skill. It can be tough to hang back as a parent, but try to allow your teen to work out solutions independently. Letting them solve their own problems can help them develop the judgment they'll need to navigate adulthood. Note that you should still be available to offer advice and support, and never put risk their safety at risk. Suppose your teen is involved in a lot of extracurricular activities and is having trouble managing their time. Instead of demanding that they quit a club or sport, try asking them, "What are some ways that you can change your schedule and set your priorities?" Ask them how they are managing everything and how their activities now are helping them achieve their long-term goals. Gentle nudges in the right direction can be helpful. You might say, "You've been playing basketball for 10 years, so maybe that's a higher priority than choir, which you just started this year. I'm proud of you for trying something new, but maybe you should cut back on choir until basketball season is over." As a parent, it's your job to set the rules, and you have the final say. However, let your teen lend their input on how and when to accomplish your goals. You might have an easier time getting them to meet your expectations if you allow them to make choices. For example, they might need to clean their room before the end of the weekend, but you could let them decide when they do it. When they fulfill their end of the bargain, grant them a little more negotiating power. If they always check in with you when they're out and never break their curfew, talk to them about extending their curfew by 30 minutes.