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Along with giving you a moment to take a break, deep breaths help your body to decompress. Breathing deeply brings more oxygen into the lungs, which activates the body's natural relaxation response. Pay attention to your breaths as you are taking them. Concentrate on how the breaths make your body feel rather than the argument itself. Stuffing down your emotions in the middle of a fight usually results in outbursts that you may soon regret. Instead, recognize what you are feeling. Then you can remove the intense emotions you are experiencing and think more rationally and clearly. For example, you can tell yourself, "Yes, I'm angry. But it will soon go away and I'll stop feeling so upset." Saying this can help you to feel more comfortable knowing that this emotion will soon disappear. If you can't get your anger under control, wait until later to have the conversation. Touching and looking at objects during an argument can help to keep you calm. Noticing the sensations you feel can help you to stop thinking about how upset you are, allowing you to focus on what is going on instead of your emotions. For example, touch a table or chair around you and pay attention to how it feels. Look at a picture on the wall in the distance to help you feel like you have more space than what you actually do. This can help you feel less cornered and under pressure. Flashing a genuine smile during the disagreement can help to put you and the other person at ease. Take a moment to grin when the argument calms down some. It can relax the both of you and your kindness may help the situation resolve.

summary: Take deep breaths. Acknowledge what you're feeling. Use your senses. Smile.

Summarize the following:
It can be difficult to maintain a level of respect and emotional control when you are discussing issues or problems in your relationship with your partner. Approaching the conversation with care and respect for the other person will show that you want to try to make the relationship work. Avoid swearing or raising your voice at your partner as you discuss your relationship issues. Instead, try to be honest and clear about your feelings in a caring and loving way. Before speaking with your partner, use a calming technique to initiate your body's calming response. Deep breathing, meditation, or even exercising before you sit down tot talk can help you stay level-headed during a difficult conversation. To improve your communication with your partner, it's important that you work to avoid potential misunderstandings or miscommunications. One way of doing this is by focusing on being clear, direct, and specific about your feelings and desires to your partner. If you feel your partner is neglecting your relationship, you should be honest and clear about how and why this troubles you. This could be as simple as saying, "I feel like we have not being seeing enough of each other lately and I miss being with you, just us." You could then suggest that you go out for dinner for a romantic night just the two of you. Your intentions are clear to your partner and you can be assured that you are trying to communicate with your partner. As well, during a disagreement, try to focus on exactly what is making you angry or upset, rather than trying to discuss all of your issues at once. If you feel you are not spending enough time together, focus the discussion on ways that you can both see more of each other and set aside time for each other. If the disagreement is about household chores, such as taking out the garbage, focus the discussion by suggesting that you both look at why it's important to take out the garbage. Avoid letting the discussion about the garbage be about how your partner doesn't focus on household chores or how your partner is lazy or inconsiderate. Tackle one issue at a time so you are both not overwhelmed and the disagreement does not escalate to a shouting match. . Active listening means listening and responding to someone in a way that improves mutual understanding. Instead of looking at conversations with your partner as competitions or battles to be won, think of conversations as learning opportunities and ways to understand more about where your partner is coming from. This will show you view conversations with your partner as a way to listen attentively to him, rather than speak at him or disregard what he has to say. To practice active listening, focus your attention on your partner and let your partner finish speaking without interruption. You should then repeat what your partner has said in your own words. Though you do not need to agree with what your partner said, this will show you understand what he said and are willing to discuss his points in a healthy exchange of feelings and thoughts, rather than in a shouting match. Actively listening to your partner is only one half of effective communication. The other half is validating your partner's point of view, reflecting back his feelings, and discussing possible ways to resolve the conflict. This can be an open discussion where you both talk about ways you can adjust your routines or schedules to accommodate each other, or this could be a resolution to the conflict that you suggest and then discuss with your partner. The important thing is to show you respect your partner's point of view and are willing to work with him to come up with possible solutions to the issue. For example, your partner may have an issue with you working long hours and not coming home until late at night. Once your partner has finished speaking, respond by saying, "What I'm hearing is that you would prefer if I came home earlier at night and did not work such long hours so we can spend more time together. I also want us to spend more time together. I have to work long hours because of this deadline coming up but I would like to take you out for dinner this weekend so we can have a night out together." This response shows that you listened to what your partner had to say and came up with a way to resolve the conflict. You are taking responsibility for your actions and sympathizing with your partner's perspective. Sometimes, it is necessary to go to a therapist or counselor to help unpack some of the emotions and feelings that are threatening to end your relationship. Look for a couples therapist or counselor that you can trust and feel comfortable being honest around. Often, the act of going to therapy together can be the first step to showing your commitment to saving the relationship. As well, you may consider going to therapy on your own if you are dealing with personal issues that may be affecting your relationship. Examining your own issues may help to release any anger, anxiety, or stress that you are bringing into your relationship with your partner.

summary: Try to be calm and respectful when you communicate with your partner. Be honest and specific about your feelings. Practice active listening Be willing to acknowledge your partner's point of view. Seek therapy or counseling when necessary.

Summarize the following:
After you tell the lie, you may be asked to tell the story again, or give a fuller explanation. Do not back down and take back the lie you told. Stick to it and repeat it as closely as possible to the way you told it the first time. Asking the same question multiple times is a tactic to get you to give up the lie. When you are asked for more information, don't add too much to the lie so that it becomes complicated. Do your best to add one small piece of information that will enhance the lie but not make it too hard to maintain. Sometimes you can disorient people and distract them by answering a question with another question. Say something like, "Why don't you believe me?" or "Did you hear a different story from someone else?". This puts the person questioning you in the hot seat to answer. This will make the other person think that your lie was just their imagination. Beware though- as this doesn't usually work that well, and if it doesn't, you can get caught.
summary: Stick to your story. Add a small extra detail. Answer the question with a question. Say you don't remember telling the lie if you happen to almost get caught.