Oftentimes, people want to believe that good things happen to good people, which can lead them to also believe that bad things only happen to bad people. It's important to recognize your tendency to rationalize suffering in this way and actively work to change it. Try to change the way you think about all kinds of misfortune, not just crime victims. For example, many people who blame the victims of sexual assault also blame people who are afflicted by poverty or disease. All of these kinds of blame stem from the same core belief that bad things only happen to people who deserve them. Victim blaming is often used as a defense mechanism by people who want to believe that they could never become the victim of such a crime. This causes them to focus almost entirely on the characteristics and actions of the victims when assessing the reason for the attack. Distance yourself from this kind of thinking by reminding yourself that you are not that different from the victim and could just as easily have been the victim of a crime. Don't forget to think about outside circumstances. These are often things that the victim has no control over at all, and they are much more likely to contribute to the attack than anything the victim did. Many people make the false assumption that a victim consents to violence by failing to fight back or tell the perpetrator to stop, but this does not imply consent at all. You would not blame a robbery victim for failing to tell the robber to stop robbing them, so you should not blame the victim of sexual assault or domestic violence for not fighting back. "Tolerating" abusive treatment by not leaving an abusive partner does not constitute consent. Having a previous consensual sexual encounter with the attacker does not imply consent for future sexual encounters. While there are some steps that individuals may be able to take to increase their personal safety, it's important to realize how unrealistic it is to expect victims to effectively prevent attacks. It is simply impossible to anticipate every bad thing that may happen, and just as impossible to protect oneself against all of these bad things. Many risk reduction strategies are simply impractical. For example, staying inside and never socializing with other people may reduce a person's risk of being sexually assaulted, but this is not a reasonable thing to ask of a person. The more closely you examine other prevention strategies, the more problems you will likely identify with them. Many other strategies may be completely ineffective, even if they are implemented correctly. Keep in mind that people may still be the victims of violent crimes even if they take all reasonable precautions to protect themselves.

Summary: Accept that the world is not fair. Realize that it could happen to you. Don't assume consent was given. Recognize the absurdity of prevention strategies.

If you need someone to guarantee your apartment in Chicago, the landlord may not accept your parents in Florida. On a mortgage, your guarantor may need to be able to attend signings and other meetings. You will also need to consider what kind of assets and credit ratings your guarantor will need to possess. Ask the lender or landlord if they have a guarantor checklist. Based on the requirements of the loan or lease, make a list of people who would qualify. Common personal guarantors are parents, grandparents, in-laws, and siblings. Be realistic. If your family or close relationships do not have sufficient assets or credit rating, you may have to reconsider your plans. You will need to have as much information as possible, including the contract, the payment terms, the lender's guarantor requirements, your contingency plan, and a clear concise reason why you need his help. Anticipate his questions. What would you want to know if a family member was asking you to be his guarantor? Regardless of your personal relationship, this is a business deal. Be prepared for him to answer "no," especially if you have a poor credit and financial history. In the long run, the personal relationship is more valuable than an apartment or credit card. This is most applicable for residential rentals and mortgages. If you are moving to a new area, especially a high cost of living area, as a condition of your job, your employer may offer guarantor services. This is a legitimate question to ask during job interviews and transfers. As rental markets tighten, particularly in urban areas, some insurance companies have started offering guarantor services. For a one-time fee (usually around one month's rent,) the company will sign on as your guarantor for a residential lease. Commercial lease guarantors are an excellent resource for non-citizens coming to the United States for work or school. You may have considerable assets in your home country, but since suing you and your guarantor would be difficult, the landlord or mortgage company will want a domestic guarantor. If you are considering a commercial guarantor, ask for references in the form of landlords they have worked with. Contact the landlords and ask about their experiences with the guarantor. You can also check the Better Business Bureau for complaints. Check the default provisions carefully and what penalties you might face if your commercial guarantor has to pay off on your lease.

Summary: Determine your guarantor requirements. Make a list of qualified potential guarantors. Arrange an in-person meeting with your potential guarantor. Research resources with your employer. Consider a commercial guarantor.

Talk to your doctor to determine if prescription drugs for weight loss are right for you. The FDA has recently approved several agents that can help with weight loss. Using prescription products will depend on your existing medication regimen, any medical conditions you may have, and the amount of weight you need to lose. Over-the-counter weight loss products have not been studied and tested for efficacy the way prescription-only products have been. Your doctor may consider over-the-counter products for you, but it is important to discuss this with your doctor before your try this type of product. For some people, considering surgical options may be the safest and most effective way to reach his or her weight loss goal. Only your doctor can properly evaluate your condition and determine if these options are right for you. Four procedures are commonly done to help people lose weight. This type of procedure is called bariatric surgery. Two primary functions are provided by the available procedures. The 2 functions include restriction, which physically limits the amount of food the stomach can contain, and malabsorption, which shortens the small intestine to reduce the amount of calories and nutrients the body absorbs. The 4 commonly performed procedures are called roux-en-Y gastric bypass, laparoscopic adjustable gastric banding, sleeve gastrectomy, and duodenal switch with biliopancreatic diversion. Your doctor may be able to help you, even though you do not realize it. In some cases, you may be taking prescription medications that cause weight gain or increase your appetite. By talking to your doctor about your weight loss goals, some of your medications can possibly be changed, or the dose adjusted, to help you achieve your goal. Depending on how much weight you need to lose, any existing medical conditions, and your age, your doctor can help to guide you in exercise and activity options that are safe for you. Healthcare professionals, like your doctor or a registered dietician, are great resources for information, guidance, and support. Don't beat yourself up if you overeat, take a breath and start fresh the next day. We didn't become overweight by over eating once in a while, overeating was a daily habit. It takes about 8 months to change a habit and once you start feeling healthier and people start mentioning how great you look, you will know you are on the right track!
Summary: Take prescription weight loss medications. Avoid products that are available over-the counter, unless your doctor agrees. Consider forms of surgery. Talk to your doctor about your medications. Discuss your exercise plan with your doctor. Be kind to yourself. Be patient.