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. Becoming more aware of your feelings and the control they have over you can help you cope with rejection sensitivity. Mindfulness is a great starting place. Mindfulness is the practice of bringing your attention to the present moment. It decreases stress and can help with the anxiety that may arise with rejection sensitivity. Start with just 10 minutes of quiet, distraction-free time per day. You can set a timer to sound when your 10 minutes are up. You can also practice mindful meditation while driving, eating, or brushing your teeth. Find a comfortable place to sit. Take several deep, cleansing breaths. Try to clear out your mind of any thoughts or judgments about what you're doing. Focus completely on your breathingin through your nose and out through your mouth. Let your attention follow the air as it travels from the environment into your lungs and back out again. If your attention wanders, simply return to your breath. When the timer goes off, take a moment to notice how peaceful and relaxed you feel. Rejection hurts. You can cope by spending time taking care of yourself. Nurse your emotional wounds by practicing self-care. Do things that help you feel nourished. Eat healthy, balanced meals. Engage in physical exercise. Call a friend. Go out to the cinema and see a new movie. Plant a garden with a family member. Or, check out a good book from the library. Experiencing rejection can negatively impact your self-esteem. You may start to talk negatively about yourself, saying things like "I can't do this" or "I'm not good enough." Start talking in a compassionate way towards yourself and you'll notice your self-esteem soar. Think about how you would talk to a good friend. Speak to yourself with the same respect and compassion. Choose qualities about yourself that you consider to be positive. Then, think about ways in which others would benefit from these attributes you have. For example, if you are funny, you might uplift someone who is feeling down! Now, create some compassionate statements about these awesome traits of yours. You might say, "I am an honest, caring person who deserves good friends." Or, "I make people laugh - not everyone can do that! My friends are happy to spend time with me." Repeat these statements aloud whenever you feel low on confidence. Coping with rejection sensitivity can be difficult, particularly when you feel all alone in your suffering. You might be tempted to turn to activities that allow you to escape or numb your emotions. Know that using drugs and alcohol, engaging in risky sex, gambling, or compulsive shopping habits won't make you feel any better. If you feel the urge to turn to self-destructive activities, increase your self-care practice. Treat yourself as gently and kindly as you would a friend in pain. Get a massage. Take a walk in nature or go for a swim. Run yourself a scented bubble bath. Listen to peaceful or uplifting music. Try to put the criticism into context to determine if it is really worth worrying about. For example, you are just one out of seven billion people. Will anyone even remember you 100 years from now? How important is this criticism if you put it into the big picture of your life? It might also help you to use a picture or video to remind yourself of how big the world is and to decrease the importance of the perceived criticism. Try looking at a picture or video of the earth from space. This will help you put things in perspective. Self-help books can offer practical techniques for dealing with your emotions in healthy and productive ways. There are many self-help methods and books on the market, so you may want to try a few and see which one works best for you. You can also ask a therapist or other mental health professional to recommend a good book. You might try: The Sedona Method, by Hale Dwoskin Don't Take It Personally: The Art of Dealing with Rejection, by Elayne Savage Emotional First Aid: Healing Rejection, Guilt, Failure, and Other Everyday Hurts, by Guy Winch
Practice mindfulness meditation Be good to yourself. Talk kindly to yourself. Avoid self-destructive coping behaviors. Look at the big picture. Read a self-help book.