Article: Left unchecked, jealousy can ruin a relationship, so you won't want to waste time talking about it. Find a peaceful, quiet place to talk, like a bedroom or a secluded spot at a local park. Acknowledge your fears directly. Listen carefully and courteously to her replies before continuing with your own thoughts. Do your absolute best to stay calm and considerate. You might start the conversation by saying something like, "Lately, I've gotten the feeling that there's some tension in our relationship. Do you feel the same way?" If she doesn't bring up the topic of jealousy herself, you might follow up with something like, "Do you feel that I'm earning your trust as a partner?" Shift the focus off of her and onto the relationship itself to keep strong personal emotions in check. Being delicate is important here. Saying things that sound like accusations can hamstring your chances for working your problems out. For example, if you start by saying "So, why are you jealous of me?" you're immediately putting your girlfriend on the defensive and setting yourself up for an argument. While you will want to stay considerate of your girlfriend's feelings, you shouldn't "leave anything on the table" when you discuss your relationship problems. Being open about your fears and concerns encourages her to do the same. In addition, if she can tell that you're not telling her something that's bothering you, she may think that you're hiding something. The rest of this article assumes that your girlfriend's jealousy is unwarranted. However, even if you've been completely faithful, you may unknowingly be doing things to cast suspicion on yourself. Below are just a few ways to avoid putting unnecessary strain on your relationship: Don't compare your girlfriend to other women, especially in terms of looks. Many women feel pressured to be gorgeous all the time and will feel hurt if you point out ways that someone else is more attractive. Limit your displays of affection to other women. Friendly conversation is fine, but flirting is not. Limit your "crushes" on celebrities, models, etc. Appreciating someone's beauty on an objective level is fine, but constantly harping on it or plastering your house with their image is a bad idea. Don't talk about how you'd like your girlfriend to change aspects of herself. See below for more on this. Everyone has flaws. This includes your girlfriend and yourself. People are capable of change, but only gradually and with lots of conscious effort. Most of your girlfriend's flaws will be still be there in a few years same as yours. Your girlfriend wants a partner who will accept these flaws as part of a greater person, not someone who secretly wishes to be with someone else. Assume that the core of your girlfriend's personality will not change much in the near future. If you truly accept this, she will know (and appreciate it). Keep in mind that her jealousy is one of these sorts of flaws that are unlikely to change soon. You can certainly work with her to assuage her fears and minimize her jealous tendencies, but on some level she will probably always be a little jealous. There's no easy way to say this. If your girlfriend shows no sign of at least trying to keep her jealousy under control and that jealousy makes your relationship a tense, unhappy one, it may be time to call it quits. You never need to stay in a relationship that makes both of you feel worse. Breaking up with someone is never easy. While strong emotions are basically inevitable, there are a few things you can do to make the process smoother. See our article on the subject for step-by-step help.
What is a summary of what this article is about?
Be direct, but polite. Be honest. Minimize behavior that provokes her jealousy. Accept your girlfriend as she is. Be willing to leave her if her jealousy makes you miserable.