Build a movie plot around this: Who assembles their best warriors? Vitalstatistix
Answer:
After a group of legionaries is once again beaten up by the gauls, they imagine: "With such huge strength, they can't be human... they must be gods". Julius Caesar is informed, and laughs. He makes a decision with his council and goes to Armorica, to speak with Vitalstatistix. He gives the Gauls a series of 12 tasks, inspired by Hercules (but new ones, since the 12 Labours are outdated). Vitalstatistix assembles their best warriors, Asterix and Obelix, to do the job. The Roman Caius Tiddlus is sent along with them to guide them and check they complete each task.The Twelve Tasks:1. Run faster than Asbestos, champion of the Olympic Games. Asterix, helped by the magic potion, follows Asbestos until he runs so fast he becomes a rocket and exceeds the speed of sound, before hitting an apple tree. His nose swells up like a balloon and Obelix comments on how Gaulish it looks.2. Throw a javelin farther than Verses, the Persian. Verses' javelin hits North America (still only inhabited by Indians, including another Goscinny-Uderzo character, Oumpah-pah), but Obelix's javelin somehow enters a stable orbit and ends up pursuing Verses into the distance. As far as anyone can tell, he's still running from it.3. Beat Cilindric, the German. Cilindric turns out to be an unexpectedly diminutive man wearing a Judo gi but he quickly beats Obelix with a "fighting technique he learnt in a distant land". Asterix defeats Cilindric by tricking him into giving a lesson and asking for demonstrations that eventually end up with Cilindric's own arms and legs tied in knots.4. Cross a lake. The problem being that in the middle of the lake is the "Isle of Pleasure", a paradise inhabited by beautiful Sirens. Both Asterix and Obelix are enchanted and drawn to the island, but Obelix comes to his senses quickly after discovering that there are no wild boars on the island, has an incandescent argument with the Sirens, and storms off declaring that they can't call it the Isle of Pleasure if they don't serve wild boars, calling Asterix to follow...