Problem: Write a positive yelp review.
A: Can't say enough good about this place. A quirky bed and breakfast on the edge of the Capitol district, this gem is an excellent alternative to the traditional business hotel options in downtown Madison. Your CFO will also smile as you'll probably save your company a little money as well. Set in a old brick building within sight of Lake Monona, the location is near-picturesque and convenient. There appear to be only a dozen or so rooms. I'm guessing each is unique. Decor is period (early 20th century?). My room had a balcony overlooking the courtyard. The hotel houses a local bar (free drinks to hotel guests), a bakery which prepares complementary fare for guests in the morning, and is adjacent to a respectable German restaurant. Quiet time was strictly enforced so these operations were not disruptive. The location is within an easy walk of the Capitol and all that area has to offer. Honestly, coming from Wicker Park, Chicago, I felt right at home. It might be a little cleaner and tamer here... but it's close (in a good way). You'll have your pick of live music, nice restaurants, pubs, dive bars, and everything in between. If running, walking, or biking is your thing, a lake shore trail and at least one state park are in the immediate vicinity. Parking is super easy as well. My guess is this place targets the visiting college parents and weekend getaway markets, but it makes a great fit for the business traveller as well. Thanks for the great stay!

Problem: Write a positive yelp review.
A: Halfway through my massive banana split, I'm prompted to review. Sure, it's a tiny stand serving Dreyer's with a small menu. Yeah, I waited in line for a bit. But service was prompt, and this mountain of ice cream and cherries and bananas and fudge was only $5.50. Being able to zip into the valet, grab a huge dish of ice cream like 20 feet inside the door, and then barely pay more for the snack than I'll tip the valet is certainly worth four stars.

Problem: Write a negative yelp review.
A:
This place is just too damn crowded. Once you're in, good luck getting the hell out of there. Yeah it's nice, they have different rooms and pretty decor. But each room seems to be more crowded than the last. There's basically no way of dancing at all not even a two-step because you'll probably be stepping on someone. Drinks are small, If it weren't so crowded i probably could of given two more stars.