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If you're completely stumped about what to get the bar or bat mitzvah, consider asking their parents. That way, you can still surprise the guest of honor while ensuring that you're giving them something they would truly like. Consider asking for gift ideas when you send or call in your RSVP. This can also be helpful to make sure that the child doesn't get dozens of the exact same thing. Whether they're into athletics, drama, stamp collecting, or animals, get them something that shows you've taken note of their passions. If they're an avid sports fan, maybe you could get them a jersey from their favorite team. If they're a fashionista, consider getting them a gift card to their favorite boutique. Remember, this is a religious celebration but it is still their birthday. Get them anything you think they'd enjoy! This is the first day of their adult life, and you can use your gift as a way to impart some adult wisdom. Consider giving them something that has been significant in your own life. Do you have a favorite book that had a big impact on you? Give them a copy, with a letter explaining why you chose it and what it meant to you. Maybe you have a favorite Jewish recipe, and you could provide them with the recipe and cookware. By giving the child a meaningful gift, you are also showing them that they are growing up, and you recognize that!
Ask the child's parents about their interests. Buy something related to a hobby or interest of the child. Give the bar or bat mitzvah something with a story or lesson behind it.