input: Write a negative yelp review.
output: I must be a snobby snobby bitch. Nope... just sober. Trust me, I tried to remedy that as quickly as possible so I could deal with this place. We were there on a Saturday evening around 9. Maybe it's okay as a Sunday day drinking spot but I'll never know, because I'll never be back. Long story short: I came uncomfortably close to getting into a physical altercation with a man. Yes, all 112lbs of me and some of you will be surprised that I was not the instigator. I was NOT. You know that look.... that certain "sociopath" type look that serial killers have; the eyes are set a little too close together and their head slightly resembles a loaf of bread, pinched in at the temples. Well that's this guy....annnnnnd all of his equally roided out homies. The experience was actually scary and I don't scare easily. "Killer" wasn't the only reason for the sour taste in my mouth. The place was a little campy/cheesy and not really in the way I like. I can't really put my finger on it but it just wasn't my thing. The service was slow but the place was packed to the gills with every ass clown on the planet, so I'll cut them some slack there. We wanted to eat but there was no place to sit, as any of the open tables had reserved signs on them. Oh........reallllly, bottle service anyone? LAME I'm not sure if that was the case or not, it just seemed douchey and try hard. Shocking I will say one thing. This experience and the few others that I've had leading up to it have made me come to terms with something very special. I don't belong here and by here I mean Scottsdale. Unless of course someone would like to take me to City Hall for a sexy steak dinner. That's my idea of a good time. I doubt highly I'll fear getting punched in the face at Mastro's. Fuck I'm old....
input: Write a negative yelp review.
output: Upon arrival we were greeted by a very friendly hostess and told we would be sat right away. As we were waiting another couple came in and asked if there was availability for 2 people. It was 5:45pm on Thursday June 19th. The hostess told them without a reservation, there was nothing she could do. Having spent 20+ years in the restaurant business, I could not believe my ears. First of all, there were 4 open tables (at least) and spots at the bar that she could have directed them towards or at the very least explained that the tables that were open were being held for other reservations, but that they were welcome to wait to see if the parties showed up. Instead they were just told no, and turned away. As an owner, I would have fired my manager at the very least over something like this, but as I have come to learn through speaking with prominent government officials and judges that know the owner personally and have frequented this restaurant in the past, he simply does not care how inept his staff is or how his restaurant is run. In addition I should expect him to reply to this complaint on YELP by him denying this ever happened or finding excuses for it as opposed to apologizing for a horrible experience. If you don't believe me, go look at every one or two star review of this place and you will see a common theme, he responds and blasts the reviewer as being non-truthful, a competitor or a miserable person. I suppose every person that has left a bad review is a liar and yet we all have the same complaints. Weird how that works, it must be one hell of a conspiracy. Now, you may be asking yourself, how could this be? This restaurant survives because of its location and the lack of this type of cuisine in the immediate area. It is supported during the day by The World Market Center and at night by The Smith Center and unassuming tourists that do not know any better. Onto my meal. After being sat for nearly 10 minutes, we were finally approached by our server (that barely spoke English) and asked if we would like a drink. After our drinks were delivered and our order was finally taken, this would be the last time we would be visited by our server until our plates were cleared by the busboy and our server dropped the check without asking if we would like desert or anything else for that matter. We sat there for a minute dumbfounded by our experience and since we had another 15 minutes to kill before needing to leave to see our show, we asked the busboy for another drink. I could literally write 10 pages on all the things wrong with the service in this restaurant but you should have a general feel for what to expect when dining in this establishment. As we were leaving the restaurant, I stopped at the hostess desk to ask if there was a manager on duty and was informed that it was actually one of the servers acting as the manager and he was in back, busy at the moment. This was extremely fitting and explained at least in part why this restaurant is run so poorly. Obviously the owner is more concerned with operating expenses like having enough servers on the floor to handle the number of tables in the restaurant and paying for a manager on duty to handle customer problems like the ones I have explained here. I will spread the word through my social media pages to avoid this place at all costs.
input: Write a negative yelp review.
output:
Second-rate version of a great restaurateur. NYC my favorite. "Be careful. The soup is very hot." I sent it back, It was cold. The server actually said this, no really, "I felt it with my finger." What? You put your finger in my soup? I hope he meant the heat generated by the saucer under the cup of French onion. The soup was very ordinary. My steak was adequate. Hard to import a restaurant, put it in a place like LV, and hope things will work out. Some of the celeb locations here are hot at times, but they do not keep up a consistent delivery of food and service. Best thing all of them have going for themselves is PR, which means hype.