Problem: What would be an example of an positive review?

Answer: Benny's Bullpen is tucked inside of Binions. The few times I went inside of the darkly lit, atmospheric drinking hole it was empty. My buddies and I were eager to emblazon our livers with alcohol, so we were overjoyed to see a row of empty bar stools ready to be claim jumped. Our bartender was boisterous, cocky, adorned with a sort of laissez-faire attitude and a viper tongue. Dude was chomping at the bit to tell us about his Don Juan antics in Vegas hotels. "I've slept with women in practically every hotel down here," he asserts while screwing his elbow into the bar with the weight of his chin. "Some hotel rooms, yeah, they're smaller than others, but so are the women." At this point my friends are furtively flipping jalapeno beer caps into their maws while furrowing their brows. I'm trying to focus on the portly mammoth that is Prince Fielder as he slams balls out of the stratosphere in the home run derby, but the bartender keeps talking to us, cavalierly, about his carnal activities. I felt like I was listening to a romantic novel audio book. While all of this was happening, my dowsing rod of a stomach managed to find a hot dog bar with over 30 condiments. Some of the toppings looked more wretched and soiled than others, but after a few barley pops, this condiment cart looked more fastidious and high-end than the Wynn buffet. All said, the beer prices, and their selection of ales from the Chicago Beer Company, was pretty top notch. The food was basically there to mop up the hops in your gullet, but it wasn't anything special. And the bartender that we has was definitely doing Michael Fassbender in Shame cosplay. Recommended for the beer and ridiculousness.

Problem: What would be an example of an positive review?

Answer: Hi quality fresh Mediterranean food (think falafel, olives, eggplant, hummus, tzatziki, tabbouleh, etc) and fast, friendly service. Best place for Mediterranean food in ballantyne area

Problem: What would be an example of an negative review?

Answer:
Their salad along with their soup is no longer that great. The salad is a mediocre romaine and they no longer offer the bleu cheese wedge along with the soup and salad combo. They want an extra 5.99 (4.99 with entre) and I don't think it's worth paying 14.00n for a soup and salad from here. Sorry, guys...lost a star in my book.