Summarize the following:
Once your partner admits cheating or you discover it, talk about the situation. As this is a volatile issue, you might consider hashing out the affair with the help of a family and marriage therapist, clergy person, or psychologist. Your therapist can help you learn effective communication techniques. Learning more about the incident will remove some of the mystery if you don't know what happened, you may obsess over what may have happened. Until you can begin to make sense of what happened, you cannot begin to rebuild the relationship, if you decide that's what you want. In every case, try to learn: Why the cheating occurred With whom it occurred How often it happened Although it can be hard to broach this topic, you need to know and decide what lies ahead. Whether or not you stay with your partner depends on many factors: your feelings, the legality of your relationship, the duration of your relationship, children, etc. If you are open to reconciliation, discuss what that will take. For example, you might consider going to regular couples therapy. You could opt for a temporary separation. Whether this is your partner's first time cheating or he/she cheated multiple times with many partners, it is important that he/she also receive individual counseling. You can ask your doctor for a recommendation. Psychologists and family and marriage therapists work with these cases. Religious clergy also often perform counseling. Make sure the therapist you choose specializes in relationships and/or infidelity. See Overcome Sexual Addiction for additional tips. Your partner has broken your trust and violated your relationship. You are not responsible for your partner's behavior. Even if you feel you could have been a better boyfriend, wife, etc., your partner still made the decision to cheat. Some reasons and situations that influence why people cheat include: The person is unable to make himself happy and seeks external things to validate him and make him happy. High levels of conflict or dissimilarity in couples. The person works in an environment that involves a great deal of touching, intimate discussion, or one-on-one time.
Talk about the cheating incident with your partner. Discuss plans for moving forward. Help your partner find individual counseling. Realize that your partner's cheating is never your fault.