Q: Is it possible to give it a lower star? My family decided to do Chinese take out on Christmas Day. 5 days prior I called to see what their process was for placing a take out order. I specifically asked if submitting my take out order would help with their holiday rush. They said it would definitely help and I proceeded to collect our family's order and call them back later that day with details. Christmas Day had arrived and we had planned on picking the order up at 5:00. Grandma moo moo was very worried we might be late so we arrived at 4:40 just to be safe. We went inside the already VERY busy restaurant and gave them our name. They said it would be up in a few minutes and asked us to pay right away so we didn't have to worry about paying once we got our food. The following is a breakdown of our full experience. 4:40pm: Pay and told it would only be a few minutes. 4:55pm: Overhear a woman beginning to raise her voice to the hostess only to find they told her a table would be ready in 10 minutes and she had been waiting for 65 already. 5:00pm: start seeing various take out orders appear from the kitchen. Grandma moo moo asks each time if they are for us. Nope. Overhear a man yelling about how it's crap he pays then is told nothing for another hour after his food was said to be up. Do not feel optimistic about the experience ahead. 5:15pm: Learn from a little girl who had been waiting 45 minutes for a reservation they had made for 4:30 that the fish in the fish tank is called a puffer fish. Cool....now where the heck is the take out food. Moo moo is going to start worrying about Grandpa being at the house with guests showing off his toy trains for this long. 5:30pm: Man wearing bright patterned fleece PJ pants and fluffy slippers comes in for his 5:30 take out pick up. He does not seem pleased when he is told it isn't ready. 5:45pm: Pretty funny to see a grown man in public sitting at the bar in fleece pj pants and fluffy slippers drinking a beer. 6:00pm: Realize the other people around us haven't gotten their food yet either and ask how early they ordered. 3 days was one reply and 2 days was the other. 6:10pm: Mr. 3 days early starts getting mad explaining he has 16 people at home waiting for food that was for pick up at 4:45. He demands a discount and they give him coupons for his next visit....sorry but based on his angry red face I don't think there will be a next time. PJ pants and fluffy slippers is on his second beer. 6:15pm: Grandma moo moo and I text the family and ask them if a gas station chicken would be good. Drum up some support when we throw in we could also pick up slushies. Proceed to ask if they could check on our order and see the gal walk away and avoid us as best she can when she returns. No answer received. 6:20pm: Mr. 3 days gets his food while apologizing to wife for 3rd time about delay, "No honey, I didn't get lost they really were running this late!" Poor guy. 6:22pm: The food has arrived!!! Pj pants and fluffy slippers is on beer number 4 I think. 6:23pm: Mr. 2 days asks if he can buy our take out for double the price since he's sick of being pestered by his super hungry family back at the house. Moo moo declines. 6:33pm: arrive back at Moo Moos where upon arrival my Grandfather welcomes her with big hugs and lots of concern as it's not often they are apart that long. We can hear the toy trains are still going strong in the den where he had the rest of the family watching while they waited for food. Family seems so pleased about the food they don't mention the exciting model train display. I trust it was awesome. 6:35pm: Realize we are missing one whole order of veggies and the extra rice we had requested. Oh well too hungry to care anymore. Sucks for my vegetarian aunt though. 7:00pm: After woofing down food faster than I have in a long time, I proceed to finish it all off with my fortune cookie. 7:01pm: Cookie reads: "Your honesty will take you far." Ha....me maybe but I don't think it will be helping the Jade Palace much. Next year - we are trying a different spot. What a mess.

A: negative

Q: Their rep in my city that signed up our two businesses for merchant services changed the paperwork on one of them (on one page) to reflect fees I did not agree to. My signature is not on that fees page. After repeated attempts to reason with them to no avail I have to say I would strongly recommend any business owner to think twice. Make sure you KEEP everything you sign for years if you choose to do business with them! We signed up with them two years ago. My rep for them at the time switched one page in my contract (which I cannot prove because that one page is not in my copies of the paperwork I kept) and now I'm paying a huge fee that I did not agree to. In the last six months my monthly fees tripled even though my number and dollar amounts of transactions did not change. Go to your bank for a merchant account because most no longer have long term contracts anymore, as it should be. My other business that I signed up on the same day with them contained the correct fee agreement but they cannot understand that we never would have signed our other business under the fee terms they claim that we did. We no longer do business with Prolific Business Solutions and never will again. Their shortsighted view of this situation is both aggravating and surprising.

A: negative

Q: This place is awesome for several reasons. One the food is amazing. The fried rice is the best. Two the cook/entertainers are friendly and funny. If you have kids, this is a great place to take them for a family dinner night as they will love watching them make the dinner.

A: positive

Q: I like to drink as much as the next person but Essen Haus promotes binge drinking and throwing up. The food here is beyond reproach. With so many choices in Madison why go to some place and force feed yourself beer to the point of throwing up when you can get drinks, better music and better crowd in tons of other bars.

A:
negative