Carolyn Hax: After your spouseâs affair how do you know whether to stay or go?
Kathy
Dear Carolyn: One of my cousins  â Kathy  â is really into lineage.  She  submitted samples to determine  her  genetic makeup and discovered  her  eldest brother âBillâ had a different father. Both of their parents are deceased.
 My mother  Kathyâs motherâs sister   is in assisted living.  Kathy  wants me to accompany  her  to visit  my mother  and ask  her  what  she  knows about Billâs father. Chances are  my mother  knows something  but  she  is a private person. If  she  wanted us to know this  Iâm sure  she  would have volunteered the information.
Bill doesnât care about who his biological father is. Unless Billâs biological father submits his DNA for a match  the last chance anybody has of uncovering his identity is  my mother .
I canât shake the feeling that asking  her  will disrupt  my mother . I believe  Kathy  will eventually corner  my mother   herself .
Ancestry Issues:  Your mother  can speak for  herself  (yes?)   Kathy  can speak for  herself   and Bill can speak for himself.
Dear Carolyn: One of my cousins  â  [TGT] â is really into lineage.  She  submitted samples to determine  her  genetic makeup and discovered  her  eldest brother âBillâ had a different father. Both of their parents are deceased.
 My mother  Kathyâs motherâs sister   is in assisted living.   [TGT] wants me to accompany   [TGT]   to visit  my mother  and ask   [TGT]   what   [TGT]   knows about Billâs father. Chances are  my mother  knows something  but  she  is a private person. If  she  wanted us to know this  Iâm sure  she  would have volunteered the information.
Bill doesnât care about who his biological father is. Unless Billâs biological father submits his DNA for a match  the last chance anybody has of uncovering his identity is  my mother .
I canât shake the feeling that asking  her  will disrupt  my mother . I believe   [TGT] will eventually corner  my mother   herself .
Ancestry Issues:  Your mother  can speak for  herself  (yes?)    [TGT] can speak for   [TGT]    and Bill can speak for himself.