Follow us: hu Improving life after brain injury Need to talk? 0808 800 2244 Donate Home About brain injury Individuals Brain injury and me Disinfectant by Sarah-... Share your story Share your story with us to help others affected by brain injury Disinfectant by Sarah-Louise Lennon You go from awesome to primal and basic in a heartbeat. "July 1st, 2009 started as a day like most others. Little did I realize that very shortly I would be rushed by ambulance to the closest hospital. There was no sense of impending doom, no feeling of dread, nothing to foretell what the day would bring. By day's end, I would be forever changed. My very soul would be autographed by the grit and asphalt of Bishopton Avenue. "There is nothing pretty about a traffic accident with severe head injuries." Brain injury survivor Sarah-Louise Lennon shares her powerful short story, 'Disinfectant': Disinfectant The smell of disinfectant awakened memories long forgotten; echoes of those long-ago hospital visits jarred my mind. Suddenly being forced to swim once more in the tide waters of the past, I walked down the corridor with the attitude of a soldier returning to the battlefield. I reach the navy double-doors with their plastic band fastened midway and their dull chrome handles. I pull my eyes from the highly polished linoleum floor to catch a glimpse of the hallway that stretches beyond, cut into tiny squares by the thin wire in the window panels. Without pause I push with my body weight, but I needn't have, it swings open soundlessly and with ease. A draft of air hits my face, warm and with a tincture of bleach. Ahead of me lie magnolia walls, decorated with old black and white photographs of hospital staff- most likely either deceased or rocking their nineties in some retirement home. I could fit at least two of me with arms outstretched across its width. Instead of straight walls the hallway has a curve, disappearing in a hundred meters or so. Every few seconds I pass a different set of doors with a hand-sanitizer dispenser: to oncology, to geriatrics, to maternity. I bypass them all heading for neurology, because that's where my story started. It had been 10 years since the last time I was in this very Ward as a Patient but with all the changes in my brain I wasn’t so sure I had fully recovered enough to have been discharged in the first place. But then, the brain is a complicated thing, is it not? The human brain is akin to a supercomputer built on top of a clunker. The clunker is your primitive, reptilian, survival brain. The supercomputer is what does your proper thinking, it's logical, fair and kind. When you are afraid, the bandwidth of your supercomputer gets used up, leaving the clunker to do all your thinking for you. You go from awesome to primal and basic in a heartbeat. Or is that just the results of a frontal lobe brain injury? Sometimes, its hard to tell and I forget just who I am or where I come from half the time. Back to stories index Creative expression Find out more My poetry: John Marshall John Marshall shares his story of life after brain injury and his inspirational poem, 'I used to be fit and healthy'. Find out more My poetry: Joseph McAloon We ask Joseph some questions about how his injury affects him, and what led him to take up poetry. Find out more Friends of Headway Individual membership Join/Renew Contact Us t: 0115 924 0800 e: enquiries@headway.org.uk Help us improve life after brain injury. Donate Improving life after brain injury 0808 800 2244 Call our free helpline 9am - 5pm, Monday to Friday. Or email helpline@headway.org.uk Join our online Community 27k Likes 25k Followers 3k Subscribers Privacy policy Cookies Terms & Conditions Accessibility Contact Us Resource centre Find a Headway Approved care providers Charity shops Fundraising comments, feedback and complaints Vacancies Join our mailing list Headway - the brain injury association is registered with the Charity Commission for England and Wales (Charity no. 1025852) and the Office of the Scottish Regulator (Charity no. SC 039992). Headway is a company limited by guarantee, registered in England no. 2346893. © Copyright Headway 2021 - Site designed and developed by MEDIAmaker By clicking 'Accept All Cookies’ you agree to the storing of cookies on your device. This will help us to offer the best possible experience and develop more of the information you need. Accept All Cookies Cookies Settings