I can't still remember the last word that I thought was, I told my mother, I told her just to hang on because we will win this revolution. So I'm just love and listen, okay? You just take good care. And I don't realize that that's the last time that I saw my mother, whenever I met again. Well, at the start, I think I'm only around 15 years old. We have a very tyrant precedent and the political situations and the Philippines is not really stable. I become a youth leader who organized young people to tell the story about liberation theology. And before I knew it, I'm one of the three female commanders of the Underground Movement. It's very difficult when you are a guerrilla fighter, when you are pregnant. So I have my first child when I was fighting in the mountain. I was forced to give him up and then I received the news that my mother died. After that, it's really changed me. I become hard and I hate the world. And I lost. I lost really my real person there. So we have this running gun battle with my eight-month belly. And we are trapped. We are surrounded by the military. So I have my assistant who is always with me. We do a paxhole. And I borrowed my belly in the ground to cover my child. And then he covered me with legs, that man. And while she was trying to cover me, he was hit. By the grenade. And I know that he is still calling my name when he is hit. And then we were put in prison. I give birth to my second child. We start our family in prison. So after four years in prison, we will liberate it. And I want to get my other son. I want to gather all my children together. And I said that that chapter of my life is close. We are already in Manila during the time. And every Saturday we gather together in one of the university. And we talk about what's going on in our province and how can we work in the province. But what shocked us a lot is that there's a lot of missing children from the regions who work in Manila, child, prostitution, prostituted girls, and nobody knows where they are. So that's why we started to focus on children. So that's where the Bessien forum started. Bessien forum becomes really my life and make me also reflect on what is the meaning of all of this and the sacrifices and where is my self stance on this. And I know that's the only time that I realize that I have so much trauma within me. That all that I have in my life, I don't have any time to mourn, I don't have any time just to process what's going on in my life. I'm just like a headless chicken which is continued to run and run and run and run. In the will be in project, I was able to go back to the original form of myself. I think it's the first time that I have really to confront all my guilt, that I have to confront with all my pains. I become cheerful again. I make a choice to become to what is really my purpose and direction in life. I do my work better now because I think I am coming from not from the hate. A dream is just really to share the joy and the knowledge and the gift that I learned from the will be in project because for me it's really a gift. Being joy, being happy is always a choice and it is not others people business to make you happy. It's only you and you can make yourself happy and joyful in this life. you