Is it okay for you to feel angry? Is it okay for you to feel the full spectrum of emotions? Can we get away from labeling emotions as good or bad or right or wrong? Today, I'm going to take you through a session that I have with a client where we unearthed her sensations of sitting and being comfortable with anger. Keep watching. My name is Heather Evans. I'm a self-care and empowerment coach working with people around the world. If you're ready to live your empowered life, walking your path of purpose, remember to subscribe to my channel and click on that bell to get notified when I release a new video every Monday and Thursday. For a lot of us there are emotions and feeling states that we maybe don't allow ourselves to feel for a variety of reasons. Either they're uncomfortable or we've received negative feedback when we've expressed these emotions or these feelings. And that's exactly what was happening with my client in this session. We took time to excavate and unearth the stories around what it means to be angry and I wanted to share my feedback during this session with all of you because you might find it helpful. What we began down the earth during this session is that it wasn't okay for this particular client to feel angry, to express anger. And there were a lot of reasons behind that. Anger is a multi-layered emotion, yeah. And oftentimes anger comes when we're afraid. If we're anxious, if we're stressed, anger is kind of like the umbrella term I'd like to call for like all of this underlying stuff that's happening. Let me ask you, is it okay for you to be angry? No. I figured as much you are incredibly measured. And you need to be comfortable with all of the underlying stuff that is actually what's contributing to that umbrella emotion of anger. Because most likely you aren't quote unquote what we define as angry. Most likely you're stressed, worried, anxious, tired, scared. It's one thing for you to go, no, it's not okay for me to feel angry. That's always going to go on the back burner and I will just rally. I will just I will do other things to make it okay. Whatever that means versus going actually, yeah, I'm feeling this right now. And what is it telling me like what's actually happening? Because the fact of the matter is we can change the imprinting so that when you're feeling angry, you actually have the option to choose. Okay, yep, I'm going to use old habits and patterns to deal with the anger. Or I'm actually going to find this healthy way of expressions that's not just all bottling up inside of me. And I'm just using other techniques to kind of navigate around my anger. Does that make sense? As the session went on, what was interesting is that there was a shift. As we explored where the anger was felt, how the anger manifested physically, I then began to shift the conversation, asking my client, if it was okay for others to be angry and to express anger to her. Guess what? It was. So anger itself as an emotional state as a feeling state isn't a bad thing. It was just not appropriate for her to express. What we had to do was excavate an unearthed woods underneath the anger. Why is it not safer okay for you to express it? And then also to discover that there are a few people with which she actually can express her anger, where it is safer for her to be open vulnerable in that way. Oh, so it's okay. I just want to get some clarity here. It's okay to be frustrated and angry with certain people. Because you feel safe, you feel held. You feel like they won't abandon you. And you feel like you're going to get the support to the outcome you desire. So, okay, this is really good. Is that anger is actually okay? It just has to be with the right people in the right place at the right time. And there are very certain people where anger is actually not okay. What we need to do is find a way for the anger to be there without you feeling threatened by your anger with these particular people. And that doesn't necessarily mean that we express our anger to these individuals, right? Because that could be really overwhelming for the system. That might not actually be the best path forward. But how is their space created where you can still process what's happening without having to shut it down and go, I'll just maneuver around this and it'll just stay in my system until something insignificant and small makes it come out. Yeah, your entire system goes into contraction. Not only that, it kind of folds forward in this protection mechanism because what's actually happening when your angry is you're scared. So you're almost like turtling yourself. You kind of roll forward and you're like, no, we're not doing this. So it would be interesting the next time you're feeling angry to notice it and go, yeah, the fists are closing. I'm starting to feel my shoulders and keep your fists closed so we don't have to change everything at once and just stand up. And put your feet about and put your feet about shoulder width apart and just stand there with your fist closed and just see what it feels like physiologically. To be in a different space and anger versus the yep, nope, it's happening. We're just going to. It is so important for all of us to be able to express our entire spectrum of emotions for us to learn how to be more comfortable and hold space for ourselves in the virus. In the variety of emotional states that we have the capacity to express. It's what makes us full healthy and vibrant human beings. I'd love to know what resonated with you from this video. Please leave a comment below. If you're interested in doing a deeper dive into your feeling states into your emotions and how we can hold space for ourselves. I'd love to speak with you. I'd love to have an empowerment session with you. These are free sessions. You, me talking about the shifts that you want to manifest in your life. I'll include a link for you to book your session with me below. I hope you found this video helpful. If you did, remember to subscribe to my channel, like this video and click on that bell to get notified when I release new videos every Monday and Thursday. Staying night out there, holding space for all of your emotions. I'll see you soon. Bye. Music