Okay, this is going to be a fibro 2, I guess we're going to have a series. I've got quite a few responses for my first video because, you know, people don't really know how to talk about this disease honestly because it's quite frankly very personal. And they've already tried to tell their partners a loved ones how they feel but nobody gets it. And I know nobody gets it because I went out the other night which, by the way, took me three days to get recover from I couldn't move. Y'all don't really know what that means but I'll get into it later but I went out and somebody said to me, well, you can't really just, you know, not account for the way the other people feel. Because you say you're disabled. Because I had said to them that, you know, when you're disabled, you see a lot of things and feel a lot of things people don't. But what they don't understand and especially if they have never felt pain, what it's like, I'm in bed probably some days 22 hours a day. Not all of them sleeping. Sometimes with my muscles jumping around so much I'm jumping with them. And the pain. I can't even hold my girlfriend to reach out for a hug. To walk to the bathroom and wash my hands is about enough to right exhaust me and to eat. Okay, so I go in and there's stuff to eat. You know, my girlfriend makes sure of it but guess what? Every time I eat, there is a price. Because if I eat the wrong thing then I'm either constipated and all the toxins are going into my body because nothing's digesting. Or I'm in the bathroom with knives going through my lower intestine and lower back. So I'm not sure which one to do sometimes. Okay, so the pain is unrelenting 24 hours a day. If you actually get to sleep, you dream in about the pain. And people, if you've never had pain, I know ladies you've had menstrual cramps. Okay, that's what I feel every time I eat. Man, have you been in an accident? Have you had sciatica? Did you hurt yourself playing football? Did you feel like a truck hit you? I feel like that every day. I wake up early morning in tears. I wait 20 minutes before I can grab my pain pill to take. So my body will calm down enough to be able to move for the next set of things I'm going to make it do, which is like, you know, go to the restroom with the dogs out. Things normal people take for granted. Taking a shower, just maybe one of the most traumatic things I have to do, because I have to take these hands and go like this. And the water, if it's not right, well it feels like every muscle underneath the body. My elbows don't work. Nobody understands this pain. Even my girlfriend, it's the sweetest person in the world. You know what? She's had sciatica a few times. That's painful. She's had like a lep cramp in the middle of the night when I had to get up and give her, you know, the banana or magnesium to calm it down on her, the vitamin C. I feel like 24 hours a day. I feel like the worst flu you ever had. If you see me and I'm wet, no, I didn't just come in from a run. I'm having a hot flash. That's harder than yes you met a positive ladies fill. Trust me. I met a positive because they took my insides out. They didn't need to take them out at 40, but they wanted to stop the pain in my left hip. And before I read the book from Dr. St. Amade, I guess I thought that was the best reason too. But now I realize it's just the doctors they need to make up their money schedule. Because after that that has directed me, I was in more pain than ever. And I went back to the same hospital, which you know what? Everyone treated me like shit. All of you did, especially the intake people of the emergency. My blood pressure was up to 180 and they still did not treat me nicely. I didn't get to see a doctor until 12 hours later and they kept pushing me full of fluids. So I couldn't even like, you know, get down to pee. And then the nurses were making fun of me like, I'm supposed to get down to pee because nobody understands this disease, not emergency room text, not pain doctors, not nobody. And only drug we have for is Lyrica. I can still hear the first few notes. It's a very depressing song and it's a depressing idea and a depressing disease. Yeah, I feel like there's bruises underneath my skin that if the air touches them, I'm going to scream. And if somebody even touches me, I'm going to scream water. And when I put me on Lyrica, guess what? I had a stroke. But instead of the doctors treating me in the emergency room, they tested me for drugs. Test cancer. So I got my diagnosis when I came out as I was weak. I had anemia. I was weak because there were bruises all of my legs. And they asked me if I was abused. No, I'm not abused. I just have bruises all of my legs because I can't eat anything because everything stabs me. But nobody wants to understand that they just want to put me on an antidepressant like they're giving to your children, like they're giving the troops. Like they're giving to everybody else, but I guess that would be a political issue that nobody really wants to talk about. You all just want to look at these stupid idiots, McCain and Obama. They're talking about shit that shouldn't even be talked about. Because it's not really what's affecting our country. What's affecting our country? Why do I happen when these soldiers come home? Remember, fibromyalgia is also equated with the Gulf War syndrome and the drugs they dropped on those guys when they were there. What happens when they come home? I already made a case in my pain, my bills, and I waited four years for them to do that without being able to work. If somebody didn't help me through this time period, I'd be on the street because guess what? Nobody from my family understands. They treated me like shit. My younger sister, guess what? It runs in families. My younger sister killed herself with a gun because her suicide notes that she couldn't deal with pain any longer. I see a younger brother almost killing himself. And I see the rest of my family getting through with self-medicating by some form of liquor or type of drugs. And I'm a can't talk about the other night with his hurt feelings from Colombia. For someone being a damn war veteran that wasn't a whole week son of a bitch, he couldn't put up what I get put up with. Because I have to deal with someone torturing me every day with nobody looking to why it hurts. And I have done multiple benefits for AIDS and for people with breast cancer and guess what? They get better. Maybe not the AIDS patients, but they've got the cocktails because people do research. They're best people. They definitely get better. They're all around me. They've been through hell and back. I'm not discounting it. But I'm still in bed while they're back up to work. Where's my research? Where's someone giving me a respect? How come I go into a doctor four months after a horrible surgery? I didn't need where they took all my insides out. My sweat is fine. I can't move. I'm in so much pain. I talked before she sees the a woman, by the way. She's going to see this video. It's too excening to the bitch. She tells me I'm bipolar. Well, bipolar, when me and I get some good parts of the day, right? Don't have those. She just heard I was a musician. So she just figured it. But then it came out in that same appointment that she only gets paid $39 to see me. Hey, that's not my problem, bitch. That's a job you chose. And her husband left her. He was a musician. I'm sure he's way too creative to have put up with her. Still not my problem. I don't need to walk into a doctor's appointment. There's a point to allow me to bear bipolar. But that's another story. So I'm going to cover a few grounds here, even though we just mentioned fibromyalgia. But you don't need to say this because you need to understand what your loved ones go through. It's hell every single day. The walls flew, the worst pain. Wake it up like a truck hit you and still trying to paste a smile on your face. Any more questions? Email me. I'll tell you all about it. Michelle, logic from a high school dropout.