Let me explain our student debt forgiveness program to all of you. You, the good people who are having your loans forgiven, you people who paid your loans or never got them in the first place, and then you people who never even went to college. We're forgiving up to 20 grand of your student loan debt! Yeah, because we're awesome! Do not forget about us in November! Okay, I know you're mad. Remember, this is targeted relief for working class people, like a married couple making 240 grand a year. You don't want them to suffer, do you? Um... Let me get back to you later. Are you willing to donate just $7 to help us win in November? We gotta keep making progress! Who knows, maybe you can't sell more debt down the road, huh? Ha ha ha! Wait! No, we can't stop subsidizing student loans. Harvard's endowment is only $50 billion! You don't want Harvard to suffer, do you? Oh, please, you couldn't even spell moral hazard.