nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Jesuit University/Buildings/Troy Theater

A delightful domicile for delectable death, doom, destruction, and degradation.
==History==
After the Space People came to the campus of Wheeling Jesuit University during the protectorate of Dschinghis Khan, they found the traditional University culture to be entirely unsatisfactory. After giving 1,002 copies of their hit single to remedy the situation, they set up the University People's Cultural-Historical Unified Certified Komeradeschaft UPCHUCK to bring extra-worldly enlightenment to the students of WJU. One of their first projects was a monumental effort to construct a replica of Pompey's Theatre. Unfortunately, only a mockup was completed when L. Ron Hubbard drove the Space People back to their home planet with his Space-Stuka. This shoddily-built replica was hastily retrofitted with something resembing a stage and seating, and became the now-famous Troy Theatre. The Troy Theater is currently located in Swint Hall, next to the statue of Pope Innocent III. Many Shady Productions movies are filmed at this location.
==Great Performances==
The performance opening night was Christopher Walken's now famous rendition of Hamlet in the Klingon language. The house was at full capacity for this electrifying performance.
Unfortunately, the audience got a bit carried away during the Sixth Act, and burned down the theatre. It was easily re-assembled by Voltron and the Pope, who was in the audience during Walken's performance.
Another memorable performance was by the death-metal band Limozeen, who performed a light suite of Vivaldi's Four Seasons. This time, the audience was abducted by the alien motorcycle gang known as "the Probers" before they could inflict mayhem on the theatre. However, a recording of the performance is still extant and is extensively popular amongst the furry community.
==Uses during the Revolution==
During the Revolution, the theatre was used by the now-famouse Committee for Public Safety, which is chiefly remembered for its intense prosecution of counter-revolutionary elements guilty of the heinous crime of refusing to colour-coordinate their handbags. The table for the Committee still sits high atop the stage, presenting a great challenge to actors attempting to perform plays.
==Renovation==
During a particulary intense performance of Virgil's Georgics, much of the theatre was burned down by the virulent Bonapartist faction of the University. This tragedy was seen also as a great opportunity. Noted architect Colin Mochrie was brought in, and he proposed a massive neo-classical edifice with performances housed under a gigantic seventy-story dome. However, the University decided to spend the money on rape counseling for members of the lacrosse Empire, and patched up the theatre as cheaply as possible.
==Future==
The future holds many exciting changes for the Troy Theatre, such as rising ticket prices. Many exciting performances are promised also, such as an interpretive-dance rendition of the Franco-Prussian War and a modern theatrical rendition of the classic "Swan Lake", starring Ursula the drunken bear.
Troy Theater
Wheeling Jesuit University/Buildings/Uncle Tom's Federally Funded Bullshit Project

The US Senate had a farm,
E-I-E-I-O
And on this farm they had some 'PORK'
E-I-E-I-O
A little cash here,
A tax grant there,
Federal dollars, federal dollars everywhere!
The US Senate had a farm,
E-I-E-I-O
==History==
Uncle Tom's Federally Funded Bullshit Project (or the Ntchll Tom's Tyskrasus Chasij, as it is known in the Cissegaran tongue, thus abbreviated NTTC) was founded by the Immortal Jesuit Emperor Fed Acker Huang with the help of the alien race, the Cissegarans, as a way to increase the efficiency of the tax system. It was well-suited to its use as a palace- its hill-top location was an extremely defensible position. However, this was inadequate protection against the tide of history, which favoured the Sodex-Horde under Dschinghis Khan. It was then used as the palace of the Governer-General who served Robert Byrd, and represented Byrd's interests to the ruling Junta of the 20th of September. After the over-throw of the Junta in early 2005, the Governer-General was recalled. The rest of the Byrdian army was defeated by the Austrian School of Economics.
==Description==
The NTTC is a confused post-modern structure that has re-invented itself several times. Though it has failed to keep a consistent function, it has consumed a great deal of money. With its vast expenditure of other people's money and constant re-invention, it can successfully be likened to a teen-ager.
==Saucy Bits of History==
It was claimed that in the days of Fed Acker Huang that men and birds mated and produced freeze-dried offspring called Axolotls. Many saucy limericks were produced by poet-laureate WJU's Own Tom in commemoration of these events, such as "There once was a bird from Nantucket".
However, this phase thankfully ended with the intervention of Pope Julius II.
==Present Function==
The purpose of the NTTC, as far as it can be ascertained, is to manufacture "Robert C. Byrd" signs for all buildings in the state. In addition, the Building apparently provides warmth to the campus of Wheeling Jesuit University by burning federal tax dollars along with the Center for Evil Technology.
==Other WJU Buildings==
*Acker Science Center
*Alma Grace Mugabe Center
*Bear Colony
*Cheese Wedge
*Donahue
*Lundy Place of Gathering
*Center for Evil Technology
*Swint Hall
Uncle Tom's Federally Funded Bullshit Project
Wheeling Jesuit University/Buildings/Zenith Space Command

There has never been, nor will there ever be, anything like it. You mere mortal...
==Origins==
No one is sure from whence Zenith Space Command came, but it is generally accepted that it is a relic of the former Atlantian Colony that was founded in Ohio sometime before time. The purpose behind ZSC is also unknown. Scholars regularly drunkenly debate its purpose, but the most common thoughts are:
*It was a fortified bunker
*An early attempt at some form of AI
*A heavy piece of shit
*A power generator that eneded up working in reverse
*A Plant stand
ZSC is capable of many amazing feats your average Big Screen TV can only wish it could do. For example: SPACE PHONE. That's right, a Space Phone. Using state of the art Apollo 1 technology, ZSC can call anyone using the SPACE PHONE. Jealous...I thought so.
==Currently==
Zenith Space Command is currently recharging after the great space battle of 1997. There are plans, however, for it's glorious return to the campus of Wheeling Jesuit University.
==Powers==
*Space Phone
*Death Beam
*Mind Ray
*Coffee Machine
*Dimensional Transporter
*Counter-Weight
*Levitation
*Cancer
Zenith Space Command
Wheeling Jesuit University/Campus

To see Wheeling Jesuit University, go there, not here.
Upon the WJU there are many things. Some are buildings, some are people, but others are....different. Places, ideas, concepts, ghosts. You name it, it lives here. Some of the scarier things on campus are:
*Big Wheeling Creek
*The Lundy Place of Gathering
*Ye Olde Quad of Doom
*T-More's Six Pack
*The Back Gate
*The Benedum Room
*The Bookstore of the People
*Campus
Wheeling Jesuit University/Campus/Bear Colony

The Bear Colony is where the bears live and play games like Bridge. Unfortunately, sometimes the bears go away, meaning that there are no longer any bears there (at least for a while).
 
Wheeling Jesuit University is the only campus in the United States that has a Bear Colony. In every budget crisis in WJU's history, the Bear Colony made the top of the list of things that ought to be scrapped, but each time it has been proposed, a Board Member has been found eaten in his own home. 
==See Also==
*Is the bear a Catholic?
==Other WJU Buildings==
*Acker Science Center
*Alma Grace Mugabe Center
*Cheese Wedge
*Donahue
*Lundy Place of Gathering
*NTTC
*Center for Evil Technology
*Swint Hall
Bear Colony
Wheeling Jesuit University/Campus/Big Wheeling Creek

Big Wheeling Creek is an unimportant waterway in Wheeling, West Virginia. Occasionally, Big Wheeling Creek bursts its britches and floods nearby areas, making people very angry. However, when people try to exact revenge on Big Wheeling Creek, all it does is send an army of ducks to cover the oppositions residence in all of nature's glory. Big Wheeling Creek's only man-made enemy is The Back Gate, an insidious creation that calls Wheeling Jesuit University its home. Despite its name, there is no "Small Wheeling Creek". That would be stupid.
Legend has it that every 5,000 years, Big Wheeling Creek will overflow with beer. Any truth to this legend remains to be seen.
It was also used as a secret base by covert forces of the Soviet Navy. They were destroyed in 1988 by Prince Coxar.
==Effects==
The powerful radiation constantly emitted by Big Wheeling Creek is held as a possible explanation for the unusually high number of superhumans concentrated at nearby Wheeling Jesuit University. Indeed, superpowered beings such as Pelikan and The Rhapsodist can trace the origins of their powers back to this location. As viable as this theory sounds, the fact that most people die when exposed to Big Wheeling Creek's waters seem to indicate that these powers are not due to Big Wheeling Creek but rather merely triggered by it.
Big Wheeling Creek
Wheeling Jesuit University/Campus/Lundy Place of Gathering

The Lundy Place of Gathering is Lundius Superbus' first project, which was the first physical incarnation of "Operation More Things Equals More Fun", Lundius' controversial new budget plan which allowed for the spending of zillions of dollars on things which were supposed to improve student and faculty morale. Most of that zillion dollars was never seen again, but that's another tale for another time. 
==History==
In 2001, at the beginning of his presidency, Lundius Superbus sent out massive numbers of questionnaires to the students, asking them what they would like to see happen on campus to improve morale. After all entries regarding alcohol were disposed of, the remaining four entries overwhelmingly asked for a new parking garage. Superbus decided that a parking garage was not what he had in mind, so he fabricated the results of the survey to say that the students wanted a new place for socialising. WJU students responded enthusiastically by falling asleep. 
When they awoke, they discovered that neither alcohol nor a parking garage had been provided. Instead, they were treated to the Lundy Place of Gathering. 
==Description==
The Lundy Place of Gathering is a massive circular pit dug into the ground next to Swint Hall. The pit is over half a kilometer in diameter and at least two metres deep. Additionally, the pit is filled with roughly ten centimeters worth of broken glass. At night, the Lundy Place of Gathering is flooded with light, and the broken glass provides a beautiful glittering effect. 
==Now This Ain't Right...==
Lundius Superbus was disappointed to see that students were not taking to the Lundy Place of Gathering as well as he had hoped. He designed posters and encouraged students to treat it as the "hip" new place on campus. While some students did enter the Lundy Place of Gathering simply to please Lundius, their flesh was ripped off and they died. The exit poll prepared by the Board of Governors had a shocking 0% return rate. 
==Sex==
A drunken couple attempted to have sex at the Lundy Place of Gathering. Before campus security could stop them, their flesh was ripped off and they died. 
==Currently==
The Lundy Place of Gathering is still open to the public. The Board of Governors have yet to receive a single reply from their exit poll. Student use of the Lundy Place of Gathering is still low; the Bear Colony makes more money per annum than it. In spite of this, making fun of the Lundy Place of Gather's white elephant nature could earn a student Double Secret Probation.
The Lundy Place of Gathering is the only campus location that is routinely serviced by Metaphysical Plant, only due to the Imps' penchant for throwing the tormented into giant pits of broken glass.
In February of 2005, an NTTC employee accidentally drove her car into the Lundy Place of Gathering and died.
==Other WJU Buildings==
*Acker Science Center
*Alma Grace Mugabe Center
*Bear Colony
*Cheese Wedge
*Donahue
*NTTC
*Center for Evil Technology
*Swint Hall
Lundy Place of Gathering
Wheeling Jesuit University/Campus/T-More's Six Pack

Although it is a mere parking space today, T-More's Six-Pack once served a far greater purpose. Well, at least that's what we like to tell ourselves. These days, its location has more or less resigned itself to being a miniature destruction derby arena of sorts, but in olden times... 
==And Now For Something Completely Different==
After the construction of Fortress T-More, there was a desire by the Dschinghis Khan protectorate to make full access to it far easier. Prior to the construction of the six-pack, a jungle trail and teleportation device were the only ways to get to T-More. After someone spilled beer on the teleportation device and a man eating rabbit was seen on the trail, people demanded another way in. A road and docking center was then built for inter-galactic travelers who stopped by. The docking center used top-secret Star Gate technology and a Krispy Kreme doughnut center to attracting visitors from all over the cosmos. Since the six-pack had been used as a dumping area for spent fuel rods for an Atlantian reactor, the six-pack, with the proper equipment, is capable of providing it's own power. However, after being sued for their use of Star Gate technology, the Dschinghis Khan protectorate threw the Star Gate into Big Wheeling Creek and paved over the space for the convenient parking of six cars. 
==Xenu Attacks==
Rumor has it that famed adventurer L. Ron Hubbard used the six-pack's Xenu-like energy to ascend to the next astral plane. Or maybe he just got high there... It was Mr. T.
==In Other News==
In 1066, Immortal Jesuit Emperor Fed Acker Huang attempted to fish the Star Gate out of Big Wheeling Creek for his plans to conquer the "Hot Babes Galaxy." However, during the process the Gate was damaged when a golf cart, driven by Lakedog, struck the Star Gate and flung it into the now jealous The Back Gate. The Back Gate destroyed the Star Gate using its Uber-Tesla Coils, cooking it to a fine crisp. The distorted remains of the Star Gate can be seen near the Cheese Wedge Chapel where the Emperor Fred Acker Huang enshrined it's remains under the guise of "The State of West Virginia" - otherwise known as The Finger of Democracy.
==T-More's Six-Pack Challenge==
Anyone can fit six cars in T-More's Six-Pack. But how many can be fit in there altogether? The current record is 9. 
T-More's Six Pack
Wheeling Jesuit University/Groups

This is a list of campus groups and organisations on Wheeling Jesuit University. Note that this is not an exhaustive list, as a number of groups and organisations have been consolidated, disbanded, forcibly destroyed, or removed from this dimension over the centuries.
==Political Platforms==
*The Wheeling Jesuit University Board of Governors - a secret cabal that runs the micro and macro aspects of the university.
*Council of Light
*League of Evil
*Society of Jesus - while not exclusive to WJU, the Society of Jesus has a large presence, both in terms of the Society itself and members of the Jesuit Resistance.
*Council of About Twenty Dudes and Two Hot Chicks - disbanded in 2003 by Lundius Superbus.
==Administrative Departments==
*Residence Life
*ITS
*Financial Aid
*Office of Kulpability
*Office of Multicultural Affairs - destroyed by KKK members.
*Campus Insecurity
*Parkhurst Industries and Food Services
*Library of the Damned
*Shady Productions
==Academic Departments==
*Academic Resource Center
Currently awaiting more additions.
==Student Organisations==
*Churchill Society, Wheeling
*COSBI - disbanded in 2006.
*WJU Civitan - disbanded in 2003.
*International Student Terror Cell
*Lacrossetitution Guild
*Community Service Guild
*Groups
**
Wheeling Jesuit University/Groups/Bookstore of the People

The Bookstore of the People is Wheeling Jesuit University's own company-run superstore. It is located in the Swint Hall Annex and is currently serving under the leadership of The Sons of The Civitan club. Its unique power lies in its ability to ignore any and all market forces in the entire universe. 
==In AD 2101 war was beginning...==
The Bookstore of the People has undergone numerous changes in ownership, yet its mission remains the same - sell things at ridiculous prices then buy them back for next to nothing or to exchange sold books for something of lesser or more lesser value, even if the student has a receipt. Basically, their store policy is "We hate students". It was later amended to say "We hate students...and lots of other people as well".
==There once was a man from Nantucket==
Founded after the great fire of 1064, the Bookstore of the People was part of the grand reconstruction scheme undertaken by the Dschinghis Khan protectorate to re-educate the people and to sell over priced books for single use only classes. However, with the fall of the Dschinghis Khan protectorate, Jesuit Emperor Fed Acker Huang abandoned all other projects related to the re-building and instead built the Domus Aurea of Wheeling Jesuit University, the Acker Science Center. 
While being a potential help to the inmates of WJU, Fed Acker Huang saw to it that all object of any potential use, for either self-betterment or escape, were to be double their value and that any object of any critical importance would be at least a month or more over due. This was accomplished by arranging shipments of books and materials to pass through several other dimensions before reaching campus and by staffing the Bookstore of the People with clones of Dear Leader, Kim Jong Il. However even Fed Acker Huang could only tolerate Dear Leader for so long, so the store is staffed by the undead and the occasional bear. 
==To Better Serve Our Customers==
In recent years the Bookstore of the People, by order of Comrade Stalin, has undertaken propaganda campaigned to try and drum up support. While only slightly successful, the results are being disputed as all the students who fell for the ads had their frontal lobes removed. 
Bookstore
Wheeling Jesuit University/Groups/International Student Terror Cell

The International Student Terror Cell is the loosely-formed community of international students at Wheeling Jesuit University. Since all foreigners became terrorists in the post-9/11 era, the international student community was forced to rename itself as such for security purposes. The International Student Terror Cell is based on the ground floor of Ignatius and has never been busted since WJU started accepting international students.
==History==
The International Student Terror Cell was initially known as the Guild of Diplomats during the leadership of the Dschinghis Khan protectorate, and it was founded in 1340 for the purposes of attracting foreign talent to Wheeling College. The best and the brightest were sought out from distant lands to participate in the research that went on at the college at the time. Delegates from France, Germany, China, and the Moon came to Wheeling College, impressed by its style of leadership and its love of knowledge.
Since then, policy for recruiting international students has shifted focus; in fact, in 1988, Immortal Jesuit Emperor Fed Acker Huang declared that he was "sick of all those damn furriners stinkin' the university up", and issued a ban against non-white students attending classes. This law was quietly overturned by the Office of Multicultural Affairs (the office was burnt down in 2003 in retaliation, and no longer exists).
The Guild of Diplomats was officially renamed the International Student Terror Cell on 20 Sept, 2001, under the prompting of his eminence Lundius Superbus.
==Blacklisted Countries==
WJU is proud to have students from many different countries. However, students from the following countries are classified as "highly dangerous", and should not be approached or associated with in any way whatsoever. 
*China: two Chinese students attempted to destroy T-More in 1978. Although the bomb went off and killed everyone in the vicinity, the building sustained no damage. 
*Poland: a Polish student was found guilty of assassinating Father Rom three months after the Lebensraum Plan went into action. The student gave the school an "undisclosed" sum of money and was never implicated. 
*Japan: 23 people and 2 cats were killed when a Japanese-made service droid went haywire in Kirby/Sara Tracy. 
*Germany: 1 word - lebensraum. 
*Chile: all Middle-Eastern people are highly dangerous. 
*Italy: every Italian student on WJU thus far has had open connections with the Catholic Mafia, so all Italians are on this list by default. 
*Singapore: stay awaaaaaaay! 
==Other Absurd Campus Organisations==
*Academic Resource Center
*Financial Aid
*ITS
*Residence Life
*WJU Civitan
International Student Terror Cell
Wheeling Jesuit University/Groups/Lacrossetitute

Typically, a female (though not always) who earns her keep by exchanging sexual favours with members of a lacrosse team.
==History==
Before the takeover of Wheeling Jesuit University by the Dschinghis Khan protectorate, there was a great shortfall of lebensraum for the students. As a result, students had to employ their own talents to survive in the harsh winter of 1269. Some students worked as labourers, others served as leaders of ersatz communities that looked after their neighbours.
This time was especially cruel for women. Since many women at the university did not know how to cook, they were forced to endure what Ray Charles described as "Hard Times". Some women were very experienced in the sexual arts from their High School days, and hocked their wares.
In the meantime, the lacrosse team needed a form of entertainment. They came upon the solution of giving quarter to some of these women in exchange for services provided. This programme proved highly successful, and soon was modeled by other schools in similar situations.
==Contemporary Times==
After the hard times, the need for quarter dropped drastically. However, there remained a constant supply of young ladies willing to participate in the programme. To sweeten the deal, many incentives were offered. Though found objectionable at first by some, the Lacrossetitute programme has proven to be a complete success. Whenever a political crisis hits, or a natural disaster strikes, there is an "easy" way for young women to obtain shelter. Furthermore, the illegitimate offspring of these unions is being brought up as an army of supermen to fight for nefarious causes at some future date, possibly even by ITS.
==Controversy==
The lacrossetitute programme came under fire in 1994 when the Cardinal Connection leaked a report saying that a baby produced from this programme was hastily disposed of in the middle of the night. Campus officials vehemently denied this, and any students on the case were quickly tried and killed. The programme came even further under fire when El Presidente proposed in his 2002 speech that "lacrossetitution" ought to become an official academic major at Wheeling Jesuit University. Plans were underway to include the major in the curriculum, but initial response to the programme was so overwhelming that countless scheduling issues forced to put the introduction of the degree on hold.
Lacrossetitute
Category:Sex
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