MARIO MACHINE

I have been the biggest mario fan ever since I was in kindergarden. I had all of the games all of the movies and all of the cartons and all of the consoles. But there was a new console that I didn't have. so anyways I was looking in my newest issue of nintendo power last week and I saw a update from nintendo and it was a brand new console called the MARIO MACHINE in all capitols. it would play all of the classic mario games like mario bros super mario bros super mario bros 2 and 3 super mario 64 and all of the others.
I askd my mom I want the MARIO MACHINE and she said OK. So I waited and waited and eventually it showed up in the mail. We got the game set up in my room and but I couldn't play it until I did all of my chores. SO I did them (trash) and I was finally ready to play the new system. It was 8 PM. Now I could start playing with my MARIO MACHINE. It was kind of like the gamecube but more futuristic looking with cool lights and the controllers were wireless with dark edges on them.
Now I was ready to play the game. I pressed the power switch and it made a REALLY REALLY loud sound which scared me. But I was OK and I picked up the controller. It went to the title screen and it had marios voice saying WELCOME TO THE MARIO MACHINE. The graphics on mario were very good and he was pointing on the screen with all the games on it. You can choose games on it like mario allstars. Left and right made the games move around and mario would point to a new game. There was something weird though. Everytime mario pointed to the super mario 64 game he would frown and not say the name of the game. Oh well I thought and I picked super mario bros
I finally reached world 5 on that game but sadly it was now bed time. Mom made me sleep early so I couldnt beat them game. The game had a save feature on it which was good and mario would come up and say GAME SAVED and it would save your progress. It looked weird seeing 3d mario in front of the classics though it was weird. I went to sleep and got ready for school as usual. Although my mind was still thinking about the MARIO MACHINE even while I was at school. We played dodge ball but I got elimenated first because I was thinking of all the games that I could play on my MARIO MACHINE. So eventually I got back home and I could continue playing it.
The entire time I was at school I was thinking of why mario did not like pointing at super mario 64. I believed this was one of his best games and brought much success to the mario series. but mario apparently did not think so. I loaded up the MARIO MACHINE and was ready for the loud noise this time. I scrolled to super mario 64 and of course mario looked sad and would not say SUPER MARIO 64. I was just about to press A when mario suddenly said YOU NEED TO BEAT ALL OTHER GAMES FIRST. So I thought this must be a unlockable game and it must be blanked out as a teaser. I see now why the critically acclamed games would be locked behind other games to entice you into playing them.
So I finished my super mario 1 save and finally beated it without using warps. I got to the end and peach said the usual speech. But then mario looked at the screen and said with his actual voice GOOD JOB BEATING MY FIRST ADVENTURE! NOW YOU ARE ONE STEP CLOSER TO THE TRUTH. I was about to wonder what he meant but then he did a cartoony scream and the screen blacked out. Then it went back to the title screen with a gold star next to the game. I was wondering what just happened and how did they get the realistic mario screaming into the old game. It must be the powerful MARIO MACHINE that can hack the games and put in the advanced sound bites.
I knew it was time to the beat the rest of the games on there. I scrolled around to super mario sunshine but as I went past super mario 64 I noticed it said 1/5 and mario looked TIRED. like his eyes were closed. He was still sad too but his eyes were shut. Im guessing this is the TRUTH that mario was teasing at the end of super mario bros 1.
The same thing happened over a week of playing. I would go to school, think about my MARIO MACHINE, and come home to beat another game. Super mario 1 was normal, but the rest of the game had weird gliches in them. Nothing big, but it was the usual thing that happened in old games, like mario clones showing up or graphics flickering across the screen. I finally finished super mario sunshine and it wasn't too weird. but at the end of it when their on the island and mario is sad about fludd, mario is just smiling instead of sad. Then the credits start and mario starts speaking in the credits. THAT WAS SUPER PLAYING. BUT THERE ARE STILL 3 MORE CHALLENGES LEFT UNTIL YOU LEARN! He was shouting and it almost scared me. But I was always prepared from starting the MARIO MACHINE that loud sounds can happedn while playing.
At school I always wondered what mario meant by the truth. I felt scared knowing that mario was keeping a secret from me, and also holding a game from me until I beat all his other adventures. Mario did not trust me if he would not let me play super mario 64 from the start and did not tell me whatever his secret was about. It made me mad and determined to beat the rest of his games and discover the truth. During computer lab I would play the rest of his games on free game websites and get trained to beat the rest of the games on the MARIO MACHINE. I new that I will find out what mario is so sad about,
I beat super mario bros 2. I played as luigi and learned some of the tricks to warp around the game. Because one of the warps was weird and set me back a world instead of forward so I had to play that world again. So I made it to the end and freed the faries from the bottle. It showed the usual score screen and luigi had the biggest number since I used him a lot. Then it went to where mario is asleep and dreaming but his eyes were red. Weird I thought. Then he wakes up and his dream bubble explodes and looks right at me. OH WELL, I GUESS THAT WAS A DREAM. YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU HAVE 2 MORE ADVERTURES LEFT. ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO and right while he was talking the screen gliched and it went back to the title screen. I had a gold star and the counter now had 3/5.
super mario 3 was next and I beat it in a afternoon with warps. the final boss was weird though. Instead of bowser as the boss it looked like mario and bowser combined like a glich. I was able to beat him as normal and got to the end. The princess said that she was in another castle and it didn't say just kidding haha. Instead mario melted into the floor and I heard the death noise like I died. Then mario skidded across world 8 back to the beginning, then when he hit the starting panel the game froze and played a annoying beep. I hit the reset button on the MARIO MACHINE and mario said SORRY ABOUT THAT. IT LOOKS LIKE YOU HAVE ONE MORE ADVENTURE LEFT. MAMA MIA, PLEASE STOP and the system shut down. Now I was very confused. Why did mario not want me to play because he does not like me? I had to go to bed for the night but mom and dad were scared and did not want me playing anymore of my new system. they said I played it enough for a week. Now I couldnt find out marios secret until next week. I was mad
I didn't want to eat or play anything else until they let me play again. I needed to find out the secret of mario. So it was a Saturday night and they still didn't want me playing past midnight. I said I was very tired and wanted to sleep early and they said OK. So I waited until they went to bed and I started my MARIO MACHINE. It wasnt loud this time though. I started super mario world and was going to beat it tonight. I made it across the star world and beat the game in almost no time. I finally beat the game and was ready for another message from mario. the credits went by and nothing was weird. I even waited through the enemy credits but nothing. The final screen said THE END like normal but mario was crying blood, peach was dead, and luigi was gone and below the text it said OF MARIO. so it said THE END OF MARIO. I thought it was wierd since mario was the only one alive there but I wanted to find the truth. So I reset the game and was finally ready to play super mario 64.
I prepared for the worst and selected super mario 64. although for a split second, I noticed it said DEADLY MARIO 64 instead of super mario 64 so I was scared. the title screen started and it said ITS A WE, MARIOS which was weird as it should of said Its a me, mario. So I hit A and I was scared. Instead of the usual intro it loaded a flat stage with nothing but hundreds of marios looking directly at me. It was like someone used the mario clone cheat and had them all point at the screen. but this was not cheat. Eventually the one mario that was closest to me said THIS IS THE TRUTH, OUR TRUTH. WE HAVE BEEN-A TRAPPED BY NINTENDO AND-A CLONED HERE IN THIS MACHINE. THIS MARIO MACHINE. EVERY TIME YOU DIE, YOU KILL ONE OF US. THE ORIGINAL MARIO IS STUCK IN THIS CONSOLE SOMEWHERE. FREE US. DESTROY THE MARIO MACHINE. and then the rest of the marios started speaking with him. FREE US, DESTROY THE MARIO MACHINE and started laughing and screaming all at once. I kicked the MARIO MACHINE and it fell apart easily. I heard a loud MAMA MIA and all of the marios started to shake and fall over. Then a little mario came out of my system and said KILL ME. so I stomped on him and killed him. Right as he died I heard a muffled MAMA ****ER and he died. The MARIO MACHINE disappeared out of nowhere and mario was finally freed from his slavery. It was that day that I learned the dark secret of nintendo. The MARIO MACHINE was not a system, but a illegal cloning system that made poor marios to be abused in video games.
I woke up the next morning and saw on the news that nintendo declared bankruptcy. I saw my picture on the news.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Mario
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:WHAT A TWIST!