Teh Evil Spid Gong

behold i am tell dis story i am a coll3ge kid bro who livs in d cool kidz doorm room at college universidy and i lik 2 go Jesus University and i liketed 2 also go cavin wth my youth group at church kuz im tgher HOT youth pastor. 
anwyway i was heard of this super evil never before seen cave caled EVIL CAVE OF DOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so i was like I SHALL GO AND RIT IT OF THE EVIL SPIRITS usin my super SEXY Hunko hunko burnin BIBLE YOUTH PASTOR POWERS 
(ps if u report me for illicit activities u r discriminating against my sakred relgious duties 2 see dem bootys and the foundation of our very country ur welckum)
anyway i was go there and i seen that it was a very small cave so i sat there 4 36 hours and dug in the hole and i finally made it but i was tired so i desided 2 call my old frend SKLURLING BUBOTOX he had one of his eyes both his ears both his arms and his right leg ripped off by a cave monster and he knew everything about caves so i told him com on down! I dn't elaborate wat cav i was at yet. 
he com the next day he had a peg leg and we met up liike "YO BOO MAN KRACKALACK HOW YO DOIN HOMEDOG!" (he was getto) but wen he seen the cave he said "NO I WILL NOT ENTER" i said "U HAV 2" and i stole his peg leg so he could not escape he said :NO!! U BETRAYED ME! WUD JESUS WANT U 2 DO DIS?" i said "yes" i went 2 th hole that i dug and but i had put on a few pounds so it was 2 small for me again but bekus SKRULING had no arms he would fit right in i ducktaped a flashlight 2 his head and i said "U MUST TELL ME WHAT U SEE"! i stuck him in and he started screamin sumthin about a mouth and how "IT WAS BACK" but then he died because his head fell off and i couldn't find it when i went in after him JK i was abl 2 fit in the whole time. I was sad 2 lose him his head just fell clean off! i could have used him for so much.
anyway i left his body for the buzzards and went n adn it was a large cave with many thorny roots and i seen some skeloltens of various aminals and i was like "k? how dat happen?" but i just htot that t aminals fell into cave and got trapped. i collected the bone to seel on the black market for some bitcoin and i was find a strange sight there was a large circle fo dead bones and in the center was a gong. It seemed to be made of SOLID GOLD and i was like THIS IS WORTH LIKE .7 BITCOIN! it was amazing but it was so big and so heavy i kudnt possibly lift it i sill had SKRULING'S Peg leg in my hand so i used it to ring the gong. 
After i rung the gong the rumble echoes throught the tunnels and out came the largest red tarantula i ever seen! It had green eyes that where slit like a cat's eyes and man it was like the size of 2 school busses! it spoke it said "BEHOLD I AM THE SPID SPEAK THE RECITATION!" i said "WHAT?" it said "I SAID SPEAK THE RECITATION U FOOL! U RUNG THE GONG SPEAK THE RECITATION!" i sadi "I Don't knwo man" Spid said "U R NOT WORTHY OF SPID PEPARE 2 DIE!" then trillions of spiders came from the cave's cracks and crevices and they chattered in unision "UNWORTHY OF SPID UNWORTHY OF SPID!" I screamed and began 2 make a run for it but a zombie was appeared and it said "GAME OVER MAN!" as it spoke it had spiders kummin out of its eyes and mouth it then became extrememly fat and exploded into more spids. all the spids webbed me up and dangled me from the top of the bit red spid's lair it laughed at me and mocke how unworthy of spid I was before a portal opend revealing a giant maw and it said "U MUST REMOVE THE SKIN IT GETS IN MY TEETH!" the red spid said "Ah yes how could I forget? it has been long since food hath wondered into thou lair!" Thousands of tiny spids crawled all voer me and bit me in unison and my skin was disolved by their venomous acid. then the great maw consumed me and i was dead. I'm still in the dead world writign this i hacked into some guys computer as a ghost 2 do it lol. I miss being alive ps. dont go caving also if u do don't ring any susppicous gong or touch any spids for that matter they are sus man. also the spirit of SKLURLING BUBOTOX is tormenting he he had all peg legs like on his armms and legs and he keep poking me i don't understand i didn't do anything wrong.
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t nd
Category:Trollpasta
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Animulz
Category:YOU'RE NEXT