Fullmetal Alchemist Episode 52: Edward's Revenge

I enjoyed the entire Fullmetal Alchemist series clear up to episode 51. I even enjoyed the movie where Ed and Al get back together in Germany on the other side of the gate. I was almost disappointed when I saw there wasn't another episode after the 51st one, though.
But one day, I found out that there weren't just 51 episodes. When I was walking down the street to get back to my house, I thought that I could see Edward's face out of the corner of my eye. I thought that this could be a DVD set that contained all of the episodes. It was going closer to a dumpster only a few blocks away from my house. Curious as to why someone would just throw away something this great, I ran as fast as I could to see what was up.
When I got to the dumpster, I could see someone with a light brown jacket and a hood covering the back of his head. He must have heard my footsteps because as soon as I got there, he was preparing to leave. Before he darted out of that corner where the dumpster lay, he told me in a very angry tone that I should not seek the Fullmetal Alchemist on his DVD or else I could wind up lost to the world. I had figured he had led a hard life and was seeing many false things because of losing all of his family or something.
I walked over to the dumpster to find a shiny DVD cover with Edward Elric's face on it. It looked like someone had just cut out his face from a poster and just taped it on the cover. The words "Fullmetal Alchemist" were also crudely written, almost as if a two year old just learning to write wrote these words. I thought that some family may have taken the time to burn all of the episodes to a DVD, so I decided to keep it just so that I could have a DVD collection of the episodes that I knew and loved. I couldn't wait to see Roy Mustang loving dogs again!
When I got home, I immediately decided to watch the DVD. However, when I was opening the case, I noticed something blue sticking out from the back. When I flipped it over to see what it was, I noticed it was a sticky note. The note read:
I wondered why Vic Mignogna decided to write this about this unreleased episode. I thought that the worst that could happen when I watched this DVD was that I would hate the episode, so I decided to watch it despite what Vic said about not watching it. What I heard right when I loaded the DVD in my DVD player paralyzed me with fear. It sounded like a demonic version of Envy. This demonic voice had told me "YOU'LL REGRET THIS SOON!" A picture of a realistic Edward Elric immediately showed for a split second as the demonic Envy disappeared from my TV speakers. This Edward had red bloodshot eyes with hair that looked like a bloody mess instead of golden. He looked like he was pointing at me with a rotting finger on his automail arm. It looked like there were many smaller versions of Edward's face crawling out of this finger of his.
Thinking that this was just a dark and cruel joke about Edward's short height, I still continued on with the episode. Instead of cutting to an intro like the normal episodes of FMA did, this one just immediately cut to Edward sitting in his home in Germany. Alphonse, with his original body back, was sitting next to him. This is when I realized that this was intended to be an episode after the Shambala movie was released.
Ed and Al talk about what they should do with their new lives in the other world. Ed tells Al that they need to find something else to do since helping people in WWII has gotten too boring. Al agrees, but tells him it shouldn't be too reckless since their lives have been pretty reckless in the other world trying to get their original bodies back. The scene then cuts to a man running past a window. This man looked similar to the one with the light brown jacket I saw at the dumpster the other day. The details on this man and the one I had encountered just a short time before were exactly alike. This had me nervous about this man's true identity, but regardless, I knew I had to continue watching.
Ed and Al quickly rush to a back alley where the man throws away some sort of futuristic screen that should not have even existed back in WWII. It looked like one of those gadgets that you would see in an episode of Futurama. This had me confused for some time, but I was back watching the episode, not questioning a single thing about this.
The Elric brothers walk to the side of the dumpster that also looked just like the dumpster I had seen that suspicious man next to. This is when I finally realized that something wasn't quite right with this episode. There was no way that there could be that many similarities between what happened today and what happened in this episode. I continued watching, although I was a little uneasy about it.
Edward walks up to the dumpster and opens it up. The view immediately switches from outside to inside the dumpster. It's almost as if I'm looking right into Edward's eyes from this view. He tells Al that he has just found something else to do and then things start to become stranger than they have been for a while. Edward now has a mischievious smile like he used to have in earlier episodes. The face has been altered a lot from his original face, though. His eyes immediately become red and bloodshot. His hair also becomes bloody and dusty. It was almost as if Edward was about to jump out of my screen and lunge at me.
The TV suddenly made a loud screech that sounded like it would break my speakers. I also thought that I would go deaf if I didn't stop this madness somehow. I quickly lunged for my DVD player and turned it off, glad that I would not have to look at that disturbing face of Edward's again.
Tired and ready to get rid of all of the thoughts of that episode, I decided to head to bed. While walking up the stairs, however, someone behind me told me that I wasn't gonna get out of my special surprise that easily. I was about to turn around, but before I could, I notice a sharp silver blade pop right through my heart and chest. I recognized this blade as the one that Edward has on his arm when he transmutes the metal on his automail using alchemy. Thoughts were rushing through my head before I blacked out. How could Edward possibly exist in the real world if he was only an anime character? Who would be crazy enough to make the DVD that was a part of this nightmare? My breath falls short and the second before I pass out, I hear Edward whisper something to me. He told me "Now you have ended up just like me by sticking your nose where it didn't belong. Doesn't feel good, does it?"
When I wake up again, I'm looking into the eyes of some familiar people. Except these weren't real people. They were people just like Edward: people from an anime. I see Winry, Pinako, and Roy Mustang hovering over me in a confused daze. They all ask me if I'm alright and I tell them that I probably just sleepwalked again. I ask them how I ended up here and they tell me that I just fell from the sky and landed on the ground. Their answer had confused me greatly.
Then it occurred to me that Edward actually did kill me in the other world. My soul must have passed to the other side of the gate and now I'm in Edward's world. I soon start to regret ever even watching that DVD in the first place. Now I'm away from all of my family and friends from the old world and they all probably think that I'm gone forever.
I only feel regret for a short time, though. Mustang asks me if I want to join him in a miniskirt contest to see who's the most sexy guy in a miniskirt. I accept his offer and tell him that I'll try and get him a dog as well. We then became best friends after that. Now I'm glad I watched that DVD and had Edward kill me. Now I get to have a good life with the man that loves dogs a lot!
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