nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Sherlock Bones: Calcium Detective

Sherlock Bones hadn't always been a skeleton detective, once he had been a live man of flesh and blood. But the things he sees on the job had long ago made him jump out of his skin. Now, he and his sidekick Dr Long Wishbone investigate crimes against Great Britain's bone density.
One of his most Harrowing cases was the mystery of the missing milk. Schools across Scunthorpe had their weekly milk rounds snatched. What sort of scunts would commit such a crime?
TORY SCUNTS.
Of course! Sherlock used his lightning fast deduction to track down the local conservative party headquarters, where he saw a milk float driving away! He pounded after it in a thrilling chase, flagging down a taxi and giving hot pursuit. The milk float couldn't outpace him for long, and he soon rammed it.
But who should be the culprit but probable prime minister Liz Truss, doubtless on the prowl for fuel for more of her devilish, Calcium locking cheese, so much stinkier and less efficient at building young bones than an honest Carton?
Bones gulped, knowing his end was probable in such a tussle. He passed the wheel of his fear powered oldsmobile to trustworthy Dr Wishbone, and leaped onto the purloined wagon of Liquid goodness.
Truss turned on him, giving out a reptilian hiss.
"Fuck off you skinny cunt, you don't know what you're dealing with!" Bones was undaunted, and dived for the Float's wheel. the two careered off course into a local cemetery, where disaster struck.
Every milk bottle shattered at once, forming a river of liquid goodness that travelled all the way to Chelsea. The heartless individual and the Skelton were both swept along in the river of Calcium, Liz weakening in the melted form of what she loved most just as Bones grew mightier. but all that changed when they washed up at the grave of none other than Margret Thatcher.
The Milk whetted the Undead queen's appetite for the bones of Northerners, and she rose once against to Liz's ecstatic shrieks, ready to level down once again. Bones had only moments to prevent her marching to battle against Nicola Sturgeon, a battle that would doubtless tear the blessed isles apart.
"You are nothing Bones. It's all over. We're going to Neo your whole liberal elite into the ground!"
Bones gave back a Boney smile (Not that he ever stopped smiling, not having lips. It's all in the sockets with skeletons.)
"But I voted for Brexit. That makes you two remainer filth and more woke than me!"
Thatcher at once caught light at her dream of European intergration going up in smoke at the hands of her heirs, and Truss, although trying to pretend to be happy too, was soon up in flames the same shade as the lib dem badges she'd once proudly worn. Bone's spine snapped too under the weight of bile he'd unleashed, but he'd won, and could die smiling.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Inside Jokes
Category:Skeletons
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Sherlock Bones Rides Again

Doubtless there were some grumblings about a recent story flagrantly featuring toryisation of demons, so in the interest of balance Sherlock Bones and Wishbone came out of retirement to kick the shit out of Keir Starmer for being pointless and boring and having no values at all for a man of principle. When that was done they realised it was still pretty boring, so they went to kick the shit out of Jeremy Corbyn too. They found him on his allotment.
"Corbyn, You've let us all down by saying we shouldn't support Ukraine. Want to do this Marquess of Queensbury style?"
"Look, can't we do this another time? I've got a fresh crop of marrows coming through."
They looked down to see it wasn't normal marrow he was growing, but bone marrow! Sure enough, a gang of six skeletels burst from the earth, and as everyone should know, Skeletels are coarse sex fiends, the arch enemies of gentlemanly Skeletons! Wishbone attempted to tackle the undead Hoard while Bones got on with trying to beat the shit out of Corbyn, only to find Alex Salmond had pulled up with a Russia today bus to take him to safety! Like any good Hamas supporters, the two of them had also packed the bus with schoolchildren taped to suicide vests to stop the skeleton crimefighters blowing up the whole bus! But Bones was six steps ahead of them. He used his peerless deductive reasoning to work out that since he'd died in the last story and was still here, continuity wasn't too important anyway and he laced the Bus's Petrol tank with milk to cause it to explode, and would spend time assembling the dead children as Skeleton children later.
The Skeletels, despite having poor manners when trying to procreate, recognised a daring move when they saw one and accepted defeat like good sports.
"Dashing well played old chum. This won't stop me from fucking your dear old nan senseless when I pick her up from the bingo, but on this occasion we take our proverbial hats off to you Bones."
With that, the Skeletels returned to the earth to resume their conflict against Skeletonkind another day.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Inside Jokes
Category:Unnecessary Sequels
Category:Skeletons
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Shigesato Itoi's Willaby Wallaby Wonders

Shigesato Itoi was a famous copyrighter who copyrighted video games or something I don't know.
Then he became a game designer and he made 3 games called MOTHER. They were the greatest masterpieces in the universe it was like this
Shigesato Itoi (ShiggyIggy) > William Shakespeare > David Copperfield > Zach Braff > Jeff Fatt
But then Nintendo didn't give Shiggytoy the freedom to put his game in the U.S. One day he asked Shigeru Miyamoto USA "Hey, can my game come over there? I wanna give it a shot"
Shiggy then said "ok i will do it"
But he did not do it, he just translated the game for Americans but never released the vidya because of the evil demon called the Super Ninty.
ShiggyIggy counterattacked the Super Ninty by making a sequel to MAMA for it and it was a genius move. ShigeruAmerica (ShiggyMiggy) saw his genius and said "We gotta make Americans experience the game...
...by telling them it sucks". So ShiggyMiggy released the game in the US of A and its advertising slogan was "This game is a piece of crap don't buy it for God's sake it will stab your churches and burn your women".
Then one fateful day, two guys named Jeffery and Ketchup built an empire around the games. Suddenly, everybody and their cute little dogs wanted a copy of Mother 2.
Shigesato couldn't believe his eyes. He went out and bought a dog to celebrate and named him Billiards or somethin like that.
He decided to make it a trilogy with Mom3. Everybody was delighted with a beautiful mixture of Ech and Static.
ShiggyMiggy was blind, however, and due to lack of seeing-eye dog did not notice how great the game was and how it emotionally impacted every Spouse 3 fan, so when ShiggyIggy asked him to bring it to the utopia that is America, ShiggyMiggy told him to get lost in a ditch.
So now, nobody will get their wish. If Mother 3 doesn't eventually get released, dogs will become cyborgs, skeletons will pop out, and herbivorous dinosaurs will come back and eat every single plant that we have.
We still don't have Mother 3. It will happen any day. The apocalypse is amo
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Shortpasta
Shimmer and Shine Thing

This is a story about Shimmer and Shine me and my friends made.
== The Story ==
Leah said, "Shimmer, you're my best friend, far better than Shine, Shine stinks, you actually smell good."
Shine was sitting by Shimmer and Leah hearing the whole convo. A tear slipped down her cheek.
'They don't like me' Shine thought. Storming out of the room, Shine plopped on her bed, and cried. 'Maybe I should kill Shimmer, then Leah would like me more..." (totally NOT the way to deal with stuff like this.)
Shine went to go grab a knife, from the kitchen. She walked behind Shimmer and stabbed her (literally) in the back. It went right threw her, Shimmer dropped dead on the ground, bleeding from her back.
"That's why you should keep your damned mouth shut!" Shine said.
Leah walked in the room and saw Shine standing over the dead Shimmer.
"YOU STABBED MY BEST FRIND!" Leah yelled.
"So? Now..." Shine got cut off as Leah shot Shine.
"Be quiet." Leah said.
== Aftermath ==
A few days later Leah was depressed. She lost her two only best friends, since everyone at her school hated her. Feeling super upset from loosing her best friend (Shimmer) and having to kill Shine. So Leah did one thing, she killed herself. She shot herself with the same gun she shot Shine with.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Bad Fanfiction
Category:Suicide
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Shortpasta
Shin Chan Lost Episode

This happened not long ago, in fact, a few months ago. I was a fan of Shin Chan, the series of this child so peculiar, that shortly after, would not see... I do not like to remember this story, I like to explain it, but it will clear my conscience of all evil...
That day in March, I went to the video store to buy a Shin Chan movie that I really liked his time. I searched and searched but could not find the movie, I asked the owner but nothing. Then I found a movie that had the black box, and was VHS, and the label put Shin Chan: Episode... I ask 'episode?, but only put episode.
The paid and I take her home, anyway Shin Chan was pleased, I put the movie on VHS and began like any other, but there was something wrong, did not say the name of the chapter, only left the title screen, no letters. The episode began with Shin Chan and Misae in a dark room with a single candle. Shin Chan whispered something, but it was inaudible.
Then he began to hear creepy noises, stop the video and saw that one of the frames of animation featured a picture of Masao, Shin Chan's friend, on the ground, the other around, and Kazahma holding a shotgun. Then I got scared, and I wanted to make the video, but something would not let me out, like I was hooked. Then the video continued, this time with his eyes fixed on the screen Shin Chan, he sighed and then began to sob, and repeated over again, Dad. Then, there was a flashback of a robbery at the business from his father.
Misae began to speak and said: Himawari, Himawari, and repeated again and again... then again there was a flashback, where the girl was lost in a dark neighborhood. Try removing the video again, but did not come out, and Shin Chan Misae and began to shout very loudly, and the noise was expanding, growing stronger and stronger.
I managed to remove the video and I saw him get into the box, where there was something unusual, the label said:
"Shin Chan: Episode 0000."
Nape I saw the show, but always I have in mind this: This video may change its name to attract who take? Can camouflage? Beware you are looking for...
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Shipoopi

On Family Guy, in the song "Shipoopi" where Peter Griffin sings, they sing "do re mi fa so la si do" instead of "do re mi fa so la ti do" and that makes me so fucking mad. Are they not familiar with normal culture? Are they just stupid? It's TI DO not SI DO. There isn't a single "si" in the fucking solfège. This has stressed me out so much. This kept me up at night, mad and confused. I couldn't understand how they could do something so unintelligent, so unfathomable. I tried to tell my family, but they secluded me as an outcast because they don't care. They think I'm crazy. Every time anyone even mentions Family Guy, I have a mental breakdown. I'm almost to the breaking point at this second. Why would they say si do? It's ti do. Saying si do literally sounds like a fork, scratching against a chalkboard to me. I can no longer stand this. The pills aren't helping me and the only thing that can comfort me is Rick Astley's voice. When I hear him sing, I immediately drop what I was doing and go to my happy place. So in conclusion, fuck family guy, it ruined my life, my family, and my fucking cousin, Harold. Have a good day.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Wall of Text
Category:TELAVISHUN
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Shortpasta
Shit Posting

So there was this man, and he had been feeling pretty constipated for a few days. He tried everything to relieve the pressure, but nothing seemed to work. Finally, one day he decided to just let it all go and hope for the best.
As he sat on the toilet, he pushed with all his might and out came a massive, steaming pile of crap. It was so massive, in fact, that it caused a small earthquake.
But it gets even better. As the man sat there in shock, he realized that the earthquake had caused a crack in the floor of his bathroom. And as he watched in horror, the massive pile of crap started to slide towards the crack.
At this point, the man knew he had to act fast. He grabbed a mop and tried to push the crap back up the hill, but it was too late. It had already started to slip through the crack and into the sewer below.
It was a disaster. The man knew that if the crap made it into the sewer, it could potentially clog the pipes and cause all sorts of problems. So he jumped into action, grabbing every towel and bucket he could find and trying to scoop the crap out of the sewer.
After what seemed like an eternity, the man finally managed to contain the crap and prevent it from causing any further damage. The world was saved, and the man lived to tell the tale.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta
Shit and Piss Combo Copypasta

One time when I was 9, I was giving my dad an back massage, I was sitting on his back and wanted to fart but instead I did an shit and piss combo so stinky your nose will turn into dust if you smelt it, he immediately jumped up and my hot diarrhea splattered all over our brand new carpets, he went and showered and I could hear him crying, when he got out he made me clean my shit with my blanket, he made me sleep with my blanket that night, I was crying so much because the smell of my shit was that bad, I vomited and the pressure of my vomit was so harsh I did another shit and piss combo, I was crying as I rolled around in my filth and my dad came in and screamed when he saw it, "how can such an small child have so much shit inside their body?!?" he said, he then said to me to take an bath and I was forced to sleep in the couch because my dad didn't want to risk me sleeping in his bed because I might do another shart and piss combo, we then bought an brand new carpet and an brand new bed set for me.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Shit cum and fart whistle (a mario bros 3 freaky fettucine)

my name is dave average Joe and I'm a white male man who is 23 and goes to college university. One day, when I was walking, i found a ness caertridge that said CURSED GAYME. i was like "damn wish i knew how to read"
i took that shit to my house and pluged into my super Nintendo chalmers(tm) and turn red the game on. When the teve tnred on it was screen MARIO BRO 3 SHIT CUM FART WHISTLE. There was 1 file already played so I picked that shit and begun playing . it was in world negative-1 which I was like "WHAT" and the re was one level. I play level and it started out with mario swimming in a white sea full of poop, the music playing in the backgrounde was the warp whistle theme but played with spooky fart noies. As I was swim around i hear creaking in my closet behind me, and the door open and unhumanoduly tall figuer broke out and killed me. Now am dead and I cant play game
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Mario
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Shitty Theory Project Abadoned by Unethical User

I was about -500 chromosomes old (7 years earth time), I used to watch the FilthyFrank Show religiously. I recall the endless negative press the show was getting, what with angry parents claiming it was too dirty for television or fundamentalist shrekians claiming it was undogmatic. It was pretty entertaining, as a kid I didn't understand most of the jokes but I used to laugh at many of the sketches that the show produced such as the salamander man or pink guy bits. Rewatching it now with my Phd in artness I can now see what the show REALLY was about. 
FURST THERY: FRANK IS IN VEGETABLE
Before we dwell deeper into the Chin Chin hole, let us discuss who Frank was before the coma (OMG SPOILERS!). He is, of course, a Japanese man who lives with many quirky characters. But what if he's comatose? What if his character's are him? Wouldn't that explain the similar faces they have? Why am I asking questions? Who am I? Oh yeah, Japan is often known for their high suicide rates. My theory is that before the coma he was a sociologist who grew tired of the world. That is why he claimed to be a researcher of mixtapers in the "BAD INTERNET RAPPER" episode. This also explains the song in the Pink Guy album, "KILL YOURSELF". So based on these evidences we can infer that Frank put himself in a coma in a suicide attempt because he saw too many fuckboys in Japan.
SCND THERY: FRANK PAPA IS DED
I cri evertim whene Dade die. "WORST FILM EVER" was a very serious episode  It starts normally enough, crude toilet humor and whatnot. But things get serious with Pink Guy, a normally silly character, telling the unfortunate news in a serious tone. Dade had a chocolate disease, a terminal one. Frank goes out of his way, jumping realms to find a cure. This is where my high school literary analysis comes into play. You see, in the beginning it said that there are only two Dades in the world. You know what two dades are? Parents. GAY PARENTS! Frank pronounces Dade as DAD. HIS DAD GOT AIDS BEFORE THE COMMA! CRY MOTHERFUCKER!
TURD THEREY: CHIN CHIN IS ZE LORD OF THE DETH
FFFFFF THERY: PINK GUY? MOAR LIKE GAY!
FAAAAIVE THERI: seriously, what the fuck is salamander guy even?
WELL I TELL YOU WHO THE SALAMANDER MAN IS! He is Frank's perversion in salmander form. That's it, its just a physical form for all his fetishes. What? I got nothing. YOU TRY COMING UP WITH FILTHY FRANK THEORIES, SKRUB! Ugh, fiine! Salamander man can also be a play on word for salaryman, the people who suffer from work related pressure and statistically one of the causes for Japan's high suicide rates. Many of the stupid hentai plots revolve around salary men sexually harassing poor Japanese girls so there ya go.
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:THERY
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:Trollpasta
ShockSiteApp

Remember 2009 shock sites? The sites that used to shock us? Well remember LOLShock? They released a new shock site but a application called "ShockSiteApp".
I looked at LOLShock's website, and it had 2 messages: "More shock sites at Shockchan" and the most convincing one, "ShockSiteApp". I looked at the Google Play app. The app's description said "Be shocked on the go! Introducing ShockSiteApp!". I downloaded it and looked at my favorite shock site, "Goatse".
Instead of Goatse, a 60 year old man in a forest appeared while being naked, and got my car to a cabin and automatically turned off the car. And there I was in the room of Goatse and on the man's bed, while I was laying down naked and screamed in horror. It was the Goatse's guy anus, getting ready to have sex with me. He started to get into my dick slowly, like the 1 Man 1 Jar video.
I quickly got my phone out, and clicked the home button. There I was at, in my car but on the road. I went to a McDonalds to go eat some fries and a Dr. Pepper. But, I went to the "Summon Shockers" page. All of it was there like the girl from Tubgirl, the guy from the Goatse, and the man from the 1 Man 1 Jar video. I summoned the guy from 1 Man 1 Jar. I suddenly became naked, and my penis became a jar. I suddenly got controlled to lay down, and I did. Then the 1 Man 1 Jar guy started to get the glass jar. 
Everyone was screaming in fucking horror. I tried to get him off, and it worked successfully. I drove back to my home, and behind my home. I clicked the home button, and clicked something called "Mac User". Suddenly, a turd cock appeared. I kicked it, and ran. A macOS computer was at my front door, so I quickly stole it. 
Then, all of the sudden, I walked into a bedroom house. Then, I recognized it. It was from the Lemon Party image. I quickly ran out, then everyone was on fucking drugs. They had the ShockSiteApp application, people had turd cocks. Holy fucking shit. Then, the Creator of Rotten.com got to me and said, "I'm sorry I did create shock sites. And, I stole R. Budd Dwyer's gun, here you go." Then, I pointed it towards my face, and shot it, along with the Rotten.com creator shooting himself with it first.
==Part 2==
Somehow, God gave me fucking mercy. I look at my 2015 watch and it's July 9th, 2019. Nothing remains, only one thing odd.
People start broadcasting LiveLeak, BestGore, etc videos on TV. It's a fucking nightmare. Even the rotten.com creator agrees. I regret installing that app, it caused shock sites to be existent again.
===Part 2.5===
Janurary 9th, 2023 and it is still a fucking nightmare. But, ED's "Offended?" page gets popular. On news outlets, discord servers, tiktoks, and others.
And now its August 5th, 2038. People are making videos like "1 Man 2 Girls 20 Cups 10 Jars Chomp.avi". I am going to go on this electric chair I have in my house, with the rotten.com creator killing me.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Suicide
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Potty Humor
Shock the Murdered Shinx

Shock was a friendly, docile, strong shinx.
He went outside, leaving his trainer behind. He didn't that there was such a thing as evil trainers.
He came up to a trainer holding an axe. The trainer began to laugh. Shock didn't know what the trainer wanted, so he bit the trainer. It didn't hurt the trainer, but it would get her attention. The trainer who always abused him.
A Pokémon turned around to look down at the Shinx, biting her leg.
"Look who's here," the trainer said. "We will have so much fun," the trainer continued, "come closer to me."
Shock walked closer.
The trainer cut the Shinx's body with the axe.
Shock looked at his body, cut in half, still not dying.
The trainer (who owned Shock) looked down at him. "You're probably going to die. Goodbye forever," the trainer called in a mocking tone.
Shock tried to crawl towards his trainer, but she walked away too fast.
Slowly, Shock was dying, and he was left alone to die.
Soon, Shock tried to recover from being cut in half but he was all alone; no-one could help him recover, It was just him, there to die.
Shock never died. He stayed alive, wanting his death to come faster. He was found, but when trying to be healed he saw his trainer, not noticing him. Then guess what, he died after trying to recover.
How do I know this, you may wonder? Well, that's because I was his trainer.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Pokemon
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Shoelaces

I had these shoes, they fit very nicely, but after several weeks of wearing them something strange happened. My shoelaces were untied. I tied the laces thinking little of it but 3 weeks later they were untied again. I retied them thinking more suspiciously of it. Who would want to untie my shoes? The same thing happened 3 weeks later. There is only one logical answer, my shoes are cursed. So I incinerated my shoes and now wear velcro sneakers. I still have nightmares about those shoes...
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Satire
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta