nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
The Great Poopstink of 1989

One day, on October 32 of 1989, local resident Bobby Blambingo was walking down the street learning to work and play. Bobby was 16 years old and weighed 400 pounds and watched G.I. Joe. His favorite character was that one ninja guy with the uzi(I think his name was serpent optic nerve) and that has nothing to do with the story. Bobby's asshole was very smelly and was never cleaned, so he always had the intolerable stench of poopstink. He continued to walk down the street until he was greeted by the all powerful King Fedora! King Fedora channeled the power of his Reddit Gold account and spewed a stream of Atheist energy from his mouth that vaporized Bobby and left nothing behind but his poopstink. King Fedora proceeded to do this to several other people with foul ass seepage. Among those people were Freddy Farfinkle, Henry Honglo, Danny Dwinkle, William Willywack, Francis Floppydick, Joseph Janglogre, and Bluster Kong. Their combined ass smellage coagulated and conglomerated into one gigantic cloud of poopstink. The poopstink cloud was 400 miles wide and 400 miles long. The poopstink was more noxious and toxic than chlorine and sarin gas. It killed millions of innocent men, women, children, animals, plants, and destroyed several cities and states. The entire human population was reduced to 1/10 of its original population. By the erotic power of bronies and furries, everyone is suddenly ressurected and no one ever mentions it again.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Potty Humor
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
The Great Virginity Heist

Despite popular rumors, many people didn't lose their virginity through sex. Infact, in 2000, many lost their virginity through an infamous heist. This was known as the great virginity heist, at the Moron Bank. This is a tale of what happened.
It was a sunny day, when Jim Carrey burst through the front door on his legit MLG motorbike. Firing a sub machine gun at the counter, the manager choked on his dick that was shot off into his mouth and died. Unsheathing a knife, he cut the telephone line and wire to the alarm, then whistling for his crew to come in.
Bob Marley, Obama and Shrek then burst through the window. They all had jobs; Jim to crack the vault and get the virginity in bags, Obama to help carry the bags, Bob Marley to keep the crowd in control, and Shrek to hold off the cops with an M60 he bought from Walter White on Craigslist. It was all going smoothly and no one else was killed, the vault was drilled, and the bags were getting to the van. Then, the cops arrived.
It was a fierce fight, with Shrek losing a nipple and eventually tactical nukes arriving. Due to the chief SWAT guy being blind all hostages were killed so they were forced to leave under heavy fire from bazookas and bullets. They all got in, covering the van as it left.
The following morning, women as young as 3 seconds woke up pregnant, and men woke up with jizz everywhere, but no trace of a wet dream found in their minds. They roamed the land, desperate for sex, and the population of hookers tripled in the US alone. There was only one virgin left, and his name was:
Rick Perry.
OOOOH KILL 'EM
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Shortpasta
The Greatest Showman In Dead By Daylight

So i heard about the leak at pax east that Dead By Daylight Chapter 8 was Coming Out, I Saw the new Killer On The Teaser, I thought I know who it was. I heard about the movie The Greatest Showman And thought that its a liscensed Killer again, SON OF A BITCH BEHAVIOUR I Shouted.
I Heard people saying the new killer was The Ringmaster, So I knew I was right this whole time!. I was a little confused. But then the teaser changed, it was normal but it said FUCK YOU AND YOU'RE SHITTY THEORIES DUMBY!, GO AND GET A LIFE!
I was scared that I wanted to scream and laugh at the same time, What The Shitty Shit I thought, Then The Teaser Changed To A Video Of This is the greatest show Played Backwards, This Was Weird as I felt I was gonna shit myself
Then it went forward but it kept replaying TELL ME DO YOU WAN A GO!?
This Crashed My PC, So Since It Broke Im Just Gonna Destroy It Into Tiny Baby Pieces.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:English Class Failure
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Shortpasta
The Green Friend

A six year old child by the name of Noah has gone missing. Anyone that knows anything about the strange disappearance is to call their local police department immediately.
We all knew Noah was a bit, well, different.
Ever since he learned how to speak he always spoke of this "Green Friend". At first we all thought it was cute, him making an imaginary friend. I simply shrugged it off as him just being a kid. Oh, how rude of me. I haven't even introduced myself yet. My name is Johnathan. I am 12 years old. As he got older, he still continued to talk about this "Green Friend". But now, he began talking about his "Red Friend". As his vocabulary grew better, The Green and Red Friend grew into "Mr. and Mrs. Jacopps". When he turned five, Jacopps adapted into Jacobs. He would walk through the house chanting "Mr. and Mrs. Jacobs died in a car crash". Curious, I looked up "Jacob's car crash" a few articles popped up. I clicked on one to see a portrait of a couple, with a husband wearing green, and a wife with red hair. It also claimed they died in San Francisco in 1954. Now I was beginning to feel a bit freaked out. I then resolved to ask Noah a few questions. I asked "Why do you call them the Green and Red Friend?" He answered: "Because Mr. Jacobs wears green and Mrs. Jacobs has red hair". Now I was honestly VERY creeped out. I then asked: "Where and when did they die?" He replied: "In San Francisco in 1954". I noticed more strange behavior coming from Noah. When I would sit down in the car, he would say "My Green Friend is sitting there". He once got in trouble at school for crying when the teacher supposedly locked Mr. Jacobs in the closet. On a particular day, I wasn't so happy. When I sat down, once again he said "You're sitting on my Green Friend". Tired with his bullshit I yelled at him: "THERE IS NO SUCH THING. I SHALL SIT WHERE I WISH". He then broke down and said he would get me back. Later that day I could not sleep. I heard a whispering outside my bedroom door. I simply dismissed it as the AC. I then saw the door creak open, revealing the shadowy figure of: Noah. "Johnny? Can I sleep with you? I'm scared". Feeling bad for yelling at him earlier, I didn't relent. He climbed into my bed. He dozed off. I woke up to an odd pressure on the side of my neck. I feel a constant pressing, but see nothing. Suddenly, there is a piercing pain and I feel as if my vocal cords are snapping. "Stay away from Noah" says a dark, raspy voice. My neck snaps and my eyes go blank.
"We're all alone now" I say. "It's just the three of us". My lovely wife shakes Noah awake. "Wake up darling" she says in a sweet grandmother tone. "Hi mommy" he says. We walk down the hallway and see our previous victims. Their door is off the hinges and both of their heads are resting on the mantle piece. "He is my Noah" I say, even though I know they can't hear me.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Beings
Category:English Class Failure
The Group Chat Didn't Respond to My Memes

When I send a meme on the group chat I expect every single person on the group chat to react to the meme. Especially if I tag you in the meme I expect you to write a heartfelt message of at least 200 words about what the meme means to you. If I tag you multiple times in a meme I don't care if I send the meme at 2am or 4am or 3pm I will need you to turn on push notifications for the group chat so that when I tag you in a meme you will show the meme to everyone you are with at that point in time. I don't care if its your mom, dad, coworker or therapist. You better be showing them the meme I tagged you in and explaining to them how good of a friend I am. I know a few of you in the group chat are angry that I found out where you live and where your siblings live. But that is not an excuse for not responding to my memes. I carefully curate each meme based on each one of your personalities. I make sure to crop out the reddit footer or erase any part of the meme that could make the meme seem unfunny to you. After this I expect all 33 of you in this group chat to write to me a formal apology for your behaviour. If you refuse to do so I will have to look for your house using Google maps and the little information I have about your whereabouts. Afterwards I will be printing out memes and putting them in your letter box. If you still refuse to apologise to me I will have to embarrass you by buying sex toys and delivering it to your neighbours in your name and make it look like a "mistake by the FedEx employee", your neighbours will have to hand deliver the sex toy to you or will secretly judge you. Not to mention the several of you that still live with your parents that will no longer be accepted in your household.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Shortpasta
The Guide to Faith

YOU will NEED:
*A CLOCK
*A MIRROR
*3 CANDLES
*PREPERATION
The INSTRUCTIONS:
#On the clock wait until 11:30 pm. Then walk up to the mirror (able to see whole body or whole shoulders & head in it) and place the candles in a sort of triangle shape around it.
#Light the candles.
#Then say to the mirror, "Anything I ever knew or anything I ever did was entirely dedicated to you,"
#Wait there for 30 more minutes, until it is EXACTLY midnight, and don't move while you're waiting!
If nothing happened, you have gained faith by following these rules. While you didn't move, the mirror was saying he would never kill or stalk you.
If you died, you didn't follow the rules, and your family will die too.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Beings
Category:Rituwel
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
The Gumball Suicide Theory

I've never watched any shows on the new cartoon network, but when I do, I usually see Regular Show, Adventure Time, Or the Amazing World of Gumball. The few times I have watched one of these particular shows, (The Amazing World of Gumball) I usually see some episodes where something odd happens. This event reoccurs throughout the entire series.'
Usually in the middle of an episode, somebody randomly jumps through the school building window and onto the ground. This usually happens when a character is in some type of danger, like in one episode, where darwin (one of the main characters) jumps out of one of the school buildings and onto the ground. The reason? It's because he didn't want to kiss one of the school students. Gumball himself has even jumped through a school window and onto the ground sometimes. Many characters have, but they never really get seriously injured or, killed, if you will. This is likely do to the fact that this is a kids show, but that's not the point.
The point is, that in this imaginary and "happy" world of Gumball, somebody would do such a thing as symbolizing suicide. And there is one particular character which best symbolizes the feel of misery and death. One character who probably was the one who truly perished in one of these "harmless" falls. 
Carrie, a ghost character who appears normally in the series. She is filled with misery and hate. And the keyword here is "Ghost". She fits perfectly in the category of suicidal personalities. "In 'The Ghost', she states pain is the only emotion she can feel" this is a quote from the Amazing World Of Gumball Wiki. Possibly being the first one to perish, it would make sense that the only emotions she can feel are pain and misery.
Could it be that someone actually committed suicide in this otherwise "happy" series? This might just be the beginning. New characters can be added to furthermore add proof to this series, but until then, we might never know.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:TELAVISHUN
Category:THERY
Category:Suicide
Category:Ghoooosts
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
The Gummy Bears

It was the Summer of 2018 when this happened, I was laying in my bedroom at around 3:54pm and I got hungry. I went to the kitchen but it was empty. This. Was. Stranger. My mom just recently shopped for a full kitchen worth of food but at time I just assumed my sister ate it all. So I decided to walk over to the shop.
When I got to the shops I went into an off brand ship I dare not name but it had "Satan" in the title. I went in because it had deal on gummy bear "90% money off! Buy them with only 90% of the money required!" I thought it was strange sign but I bought them anyway. When buying it the guy who had a goatee and pencil mustache said "will you be using our deal?" I said yes and payed 0.30¢ for 1kg of gummy bears, or at least what I thought were gummy bears and walked home with my bucket of jellies mouth watering and dancing. When I got home I opened it and when I did a pool of red liquid poured out of the bucket. I went to clean it but then I realize it was blood and I ran away back to the shop but it was gone. It turned into a pet shop with "Angel" in the name.
I went into the shop and when I did a nice blonde haired muscular guy said "Hello would you like a pet?" I said no is there a food shop here with Satan in the name?. The guy shut the shop and said "ok I'll tell you the truth that was a Satan shop, we destroyed it and replaced it with angel pets to protect people from Satan. We'll give you a free pet to protect you. It'll look like a tiger to you but it's a house cat to everyone else." I walked out with the tiger called Shane. When I got back home their were little dots of blood everywhere. suddenly a gummy bear attacked me and I ate it. It exploded into blood and more blood fell all over my kitchen. More gummy bears came over and I hit them all and they burst into blood then Shane (the tiger) attached them and more blood came. It was a 1kg bottle so I don't Know how many they're were but I new it was lots. I walked outside and the sky was blood red and a giant eye was looking down at me. "I am Satan and I will rule this world because of you!" And shot a hellish Laser at me. Suddenly a heavenly shield deflected it and destroyed the eye and the world was saved. Shane died as he was the shield. Also... They were 90% off with money but I paid with 90% of my soul...
Category:Trollpasta
Category:EVIL FOOD
Category:Stuff Blowing Up
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
The Guru

Master guru held my gaze as we looked into each others eyes for the first time. But before we get there lets tell you this my friend, do not do what i have done. One day once upon ago i opened my email...
And i got a message for my gmail? It was my account signed in from another device? Wow. I pondered this reality. Then i remembered. I signed into my email at school, no wonder i got this alert.
Then...
I got another email? From someone i didnt even know. His name was guruopenureyes@xxxxxxx.com, but who he really was, i will ever find out. Especially since i will most likely die of extinction because of the email.
It was a link to a video. I downloaded it and when it opened i could not believe what i saw...
The file format was unknown. Wow. so i download a converter and opened it. What i saw i will nor believe...
A dirty man, with a beard covering his neck and face, with rainbow beads and seashells tied in his hair? Maybe it was something else. But he told me to breathe, so i did, and he said to breathe out, so i did. But then he told me to do it to a rhethim, one, two, one, two, so forth etc et al. so i did and he told me things about psychology and my mind and how to open it and connect the dots from my Brian to my heart. So i did. Then he asked me something quite peculiar, of which i was aquicenst, but then i answered him. Yes master guru i can control it now, my mind and my heart are one father.
What a relief, nothing bad, best video i ever saw up to that point. But then he said STOP and the video quitted. I could not breathe without thinking about it!!! And i had to tell my heart to beat everytime!! 1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2 i breathed and made my heart go at 70 beats a minute! For since then to now. And guess what guys, the worst part is math class. I cannot do math!! I have to say sorry teacher i just cant do it right now. Im sorry but i just cant you understand? And then i leave and i get in trouble!! They actually give me ISS. I told them, i says i says, listen guys, i have to think about my breath and my heart, if i dont i will die!! And they call me a cyclepathic liar. I cant get anyone to listen to me. I swear to god and on my mammas grave, my grandmas grave, anyones grave that im not lying. I cant breath and im in ISS all day. But ISS is fine because i can think about my breath and my heart. My friends call me a prophet at school. Always saying im trying too hard to be spirited. Hell no im not.
Please do whatever you can to NOT OPEN THE VIDEO please.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:English Class Failure
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
The Ha-HUUUAAAAH!

Once, near the Atlantic island Bikini Atoll, there was a small town with a popular restaurant. Famous for its burgers and its talented fry cook. He was a likeable guy, serving up food with a smile. But tragedy struck when he was cutting the patties... that's when it happened. You might be thinking the following questions...
Did he forget the secret sauce?
No.
He didn't wash his hands?
No.
Irregular portions?
No! He cut off his own hand by mistake! He couldn't get a prosthetic, so he used a grisly spatula as a replacement. Everyone thought his skills were ruined, but he did just fine with the new "hand". It was an unhappy day, but everything was back to normal once he got back to work. One day, he was rushing to work, when he was hit by a bus! At his funeral, his boss fired him! Every Tuesday at the restaurant, his ghost comes to haunt the place after dark. There are three signs of his incoming arrival.
One, the lights will flicker on and off.
Two, the phone will ring and nooooobody will be there!
Three, a fog will roll in as the ghost of the bus that ran him over stops across from the restaurant. Much later than the normal bus schedule. He'll open the door...
CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK!
Then... he... GETS THEM!
What do people call him? They call him the "Ha- HUUUAAAH!" because that's all they have time to say before... he... gets them!
But what is his true name?
The Hash-Slinging Slasher.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:SpongeBob
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Shortpasta
The Hacker

When i was looking through my feed, i saw a very strange message "This idiot gave me his roblox account! gg no re get rekt. Too bad he doesnt have much -a hacker"
I went back on the person who had the message and i looked at his game... Awesome Update Medivael Advanced 200 VISITS, I went on the game and i saw a message that said.. "Get out Or you shall perish"
I went back on the game and i saw another message that said "Your death shall come, idiotic child" I was very scared, and i thought i may die, the screen turned red and it said a very strange text "WE ARE GODS"
I went on my own game, and i saw him on my game, waiting for me. the only letters he said in the text were "Get Ready." I tried to kill him with admin, but he couldn't die in the game. I repeated the commands but he wouldn't die. When i killed him the last time the screen turned red and it appeared with a text "Nothing can happen to us, we are immortal idiot"
I went on the game again and i saw him again, but with a different face. the face had two glaring red eyes, and the mouth was mangled, and morbid. I walked up to the character and i repeatedly slashed him with my gear, but he wouldn't even lose one health. The person stared at me, and grabbed a sword identical to mine. He killed me in one hit, and the server froze. It came up with a pop-up and it said "Roblox has to quit, We're sorry!"
I went back onto the game again and i saw him again, but something looked a bit strange. He had a mangled, deceased body, and a morbid, mangled face. There was another pop-up and it had the face of the character on the screen, covered in blood.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Roblox
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Read by HoodoHoodlum
Category:Shortpasta
The Half-Cent Computer

On ebay, a guy was selling this totally rad computer. It like totally had all these games and apps for me to like socialize with my 19,567 Facebook friends! It was so just like totes awesome! To like top it all off, It was like only one half cent! not even a penny! I like bought the computer, and it like came in the mail. I plugged it in and totally tried it out! The games were like so rad! When I like looking through the files and whatever, I found a video of that blue guy from spongebob like killing himself. I also found like this video of some tall thin guy. He was like sooooooooo unattracive. The videos were like totally gross. It made me like totally puke. This SOOOOOOOOO NOT RAD! I like smashed the computer with a sledgehammer and whatever. And that is totally like my story whatevs. Now I have to like, tell it to my 19,567 Facebook friends! OMG now I have like 19,568. I am totally thee raddest girl at my snobby rich high school!
O.M.G. LIKE TOTALLY TOO MANY PICTURES!!!!!
And then a skeleton popped out!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:English Class Failure
Category:PROOF DAT SLENDURMAN EXUSTS
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Memes
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:Shortpasta
The Halo Skulls

Okay so I'm playing a game of matchmaking on halo reach, and all of a sudden I see a floating shotgun! I thought it was just some lag. But then it started to move. It followed me. Never shooting at me... Then when I looked in my bedroom mirror I saw the shotgun. I'm pretty sure I was just hallucinating. Until of course I saw it in my kitchen the next day. Its just one of those things that make you go what the fuck? daily... you know?
So then I started seeing the skulls too. When I played last night they all flashed randomly. Then I started seeing them floating around in front of me. I think I'm going insane. I've stopped playing Halo Reach for now. I'm scared...
My game is totally busted right? and I'm just going insane? I hope so... maybe its because I have a modded Xbox 360 controller... maybe some buttons are broken... man I sure hope so...
Though I'm also a fucking liar who likes to fuck with people
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta