nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Soup

When you make soup, and the spoon falls all the way into your soup. Do you feel weird licking the handle? I mean, you always put one end in your mouth, why does it feel so weird licking the handle clean? Or do you not lick the handle clean? Do you use your napkin and clean off all that soup now you need to get yourself a new napkin because that napkin is soaked in soup? You know there's no way you're going to clean yourself with a soup soaked napkin, you might as well have licked the handle. But say you actually licked the handle, do you use the napkin to clean your saliva off the napkin? Isn't it just moot at this point because the little saliva that you just put on your napkin that you've avoided putting on your hand will eventually get on your hand anyway because you're going to grab the napkin again, unless you're somehow gambling that you'll never touch the spot on the napkin where you've wiped your mouth and when you've finished your soup you've avoided any saliva getting on your hand and that's somehow you telling the Universe, "Not today, ether!" for losing your soup in the first place?
You're a soup liar. Just lick the handle. Make it weird, do it in front of people.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:EVIL FOOD
Category:Shortpasta
South Park: Ultra Mega Lost Episode

One fine saturday, on a small rocky planet orbiting a yellow dwarf star, in the town of [Data Extracted], Texas, I was looking for some good old fashioned South Park episodes on the interwebz, because my sister died and I was feeling pretty good. I went to google, and went to the offical website. After getting there, I clicked on the "Coming Soon" episode. Then all my applications closed and my screen background turned into a trollface. I got pissed, because it usually takes me several hours to fix it, because I have brain damage and can't function properly. Anyways, after 9 hours and a few visits to the E.R., I discovered that I had a new file called "Bestest South Park evar". So after I clicked on it, it opened and a video started playing. The 4 main boys were standing there, just like normal, when Stan said "I heard there are others out there." Kyle responded by saying "Ya, and we have to get rid of them." I was liek "wat" but watched on. After that, the boys walked for a while, and they ended up in what looked like a military base, and they stole a Black Hawk helicopter. After about an hour, they landed in Springfield, climbed out, and proceeded to murder everyone in the entire town in 2 minutes. I literally shat myself and wondered what the fuck was up with them. Then, they went across the entire country and killed all of the other animated cartoons that took place there. It followed a pattern that went something like this: They would fly to the target, kill everyone with guns and other weapons, and leave for the next area. About half way through, Kenny started beating the girls before killing them, but that was the only change. Then, the boys killed all the shows, fictional or not, across the americas. I'm talking every show, even some that don't exist yet. Then, they went around the world, until every show on earth was dead. I'm talking EVERY show, ones that were well known, some that were so underground that it took me weeks to find them, and some that don't exist at all. Cartman said "Well, now what?" Stan responed by saying, "There are still others, and they must die." They took a few sci-fi devices, and went across the whole universe, and everything else, killing all life, until nothing was left. All of this, the extermination of all life, took 7 hours. After this the screen cut to black and said "There was a reason for all this killing, all other shows are inferior to South Park. Now thereis nothing left. So I say to you, watch this." Then my computer died, and a hyper realistic skeleton popped out. But i pushed it aside and stared out my window for a while. And the boys missed something. They missed us, our entire universe. And they will know, and they will come.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:Wall of Text
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was pointless.
South Park "Bad Guy" Lost Episode

I've been a fan of South Park since 1841, and I've seen all the episodes. One day I was going to the beach and I tripped and fell. I looked under my Yeezys and saw a VHS tape that had red writing on it. The writing said "Evil south park do not watch very bad don't watch please don't." Because I'm a dumbass, I forgot about my beach trip and went back home to watch the tape. I dusted off my old VHS player and put in the tape. While I was putting the tape in, something scary happened, but that's not important so we won't talk about that part. Then the episode started off normal, except when the guy with the banjo came out to sing the theme song he had a shotgun and blew Cartman's head off. I threw up and started jacking off. At the part where Stan and Kyle sing in the bus Kyle pulled out da 9 and shot himself in the head. Stan started crying blood, but the blood was hyper-realistic. I threw up again. Cartman's singing part was not there since he was killed by the guy with the shotgun. Instead of Kenny singing his normal part, he exploded. Instead of all the people of South Park gathering together, it was a pile of dead bodies, but other than that, it was normal. Also I threw up again. So the episode started off normally but Cartman wasn't there. I expected him to walk into frame but instead it cut to his mutilated dead body. It had no legs, or arms, just a torso with Cartman's head on it. I started crying and shaking and shidding and farding because Cartman is my favorite character. Then the shot panned out and it revealed that Kenny was standing there, looking hyper-realistic. He was crying. He then said "mphmphmPMHPmhpmmpmh" which I think meant "I'm gonna take everything you love 666 Xd". In the background I could make out a noise that sounded like Randy (Stan's dad) giving a monologue about Satan. Kenny then pulled out a shotgun and said the "I'm gonna take everything you love" thing again. It then cut to Kenny flying a plane, and then a nuke dropped out of a plane. The nuke blew up South Park and killed everybody. Then Kenny became hyper-realistic and his hyper-realistic eyes fell out to reveal hyper-realistic holes and then hyper-realistic red dots appeared in his eyes and hyper-realistic blood came out of the holes. 2 years of silence passed and then Kenny said "You're next" and then he jumpscared me. I threw up one final time. Then text appeared on the screen and it said "You R next Lol". I was so scared. Then Kenny jumped out of the screen and killed me and my whole family.
So my soul actually just contacted Comedy Central and this is the message they gave me:
"some guy made that episode while he was high on crack but idk bout that weird shit u saw lol also sorry for getting you killed"
The end
The bad guy22.png|evil ken
U r next lol.jpg|the text
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Crappy ms paint drawings
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:YOU'RE NEXT
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
South Park - Cartman Snaps!

My 20 years of living has been traumatized today thanks to a video tape from South Park.
It started when I was trying to find DVD's for Family Guy and I stumbled across a South Park DVD entitled "Cartman Snaps" written in red with a dark red background, so I bought the DVD because I do not remember seeing a episode called Cartman Snaps before so I went home and put the disc in the player.
It started with the iconic intro but something wasn't right, The characters looked evil, they had red eyes and sharp animal teeth, Cartman was even creepier because his eyes were pitch-black and wide, and he had shark teeth with blood all over them, after the line "So come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine" instead of Ike being thrown at the sign, it was an axe, instead of the sign a little bit falling down, it was completely cut in half, and the episode started.
It started with Kyle and Cartman arguing like always but it was different, the argument sounded serious, they were multiple fingers and fucks in the argument, Cartman had it and went inside, Cartman finds a glass bottle, he goes back outside, Kyle was talking to Stan about how Cartman was being mean to him recently, Cartman was slowly rising behind Kyle and he rammed the bottle into Kyle so quick the bottle broke, causing glass and blood to fly, Stan and Kenny rushed over to Kyle as Cartman grabbed an axe and hit the fence with it repeatedly, Stan and Kenny ran to Cartman and beat the hell out of the poor boy, Cartman kicked Kenny in his right eye, causing the eye to gouge out of his socket, Stan said the iconic line, but before he said bastard, Cartman found a wooden plank and repeatedly slapped Stan with it left to right. Cartman ran inside and throw a fit.
Cartman was crying hysterically and stopped crying suddenly after he broke a window and jumped out of it, Cartman killed 750 people, he almost killed the whole entire city, He shoved a knife up Wendy's back, He decapitated Bebe, he beat Red McArthur with a bat to death, I'm not gonna list the rest, but after that, some really disturbing clips began to play : First clip was a skull nearly covered in dirt, a skull with a hole in its cranium, a almost melted doll with his hair moving a bit, animals tearing at another animal, a riot, an eye surgery, an fireman caught in a dangerously huge fire, etc.
After all the clips played, Cartman was walking on the pavement, and he had a little pocket knife in his fanny pack, he also had a real bow on him, Cartman said "Say cheese, motherfuckers" and shot all of the citizens, then Cartman got caught killing people and was sent to jail, the screen turned black with text saying, "WHOEVER IS WATCHING THIS, YOU SHOULD NEVER VIEW IT OR ELSE YOU WILL FACE KYLE'S HORRID FATE". I was shocked, I took out the disc and burned it, I never want to deal with or watch South Park ever again.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
South Park Full Episode

So I was on Youtube and I saw a video called South Park Full Episode. I thought I would watch it despite that it was probably just spam/advertising. Surprisingly it wasn't as I heard the theme tune and I watched the episode. So the episode began with Cartman, Stan, Kenny and Kyle waiting for the bus, Cartman was really angry at Kyle calling him a "Dirty Jew", I laughed because this is how South Park Episodes usually are. Then, Cartman pulled out a knife and aimed it at Kyle but Luckily, Kyle ducked and Cartman hit Kenny instead. I laughed because Kenny always dies in the show. I was expecting for Stan and Kyle to go "Oh my God! He killed Kenny! You Bastard!" which is what they always do when Kenny dies but instead they just ran off, leaving Cartman in a rage. Cartman went home and his Mother was there. "Hello Dear" she said but Cartman didn't want to talk so he replied "Shut the Fuck up you stupid cow!" Then he want to the cupboard to get his Cheesy Poofs but his Cat went to him so he kicked him over. Then he tried to open his Cheesy Poofs but it was too hard so he got a knife but then his cat came up to him again so he got a knife and stabbed him. I was shocked but then I remembered South Park do this all the time so I kept watching. Then Cartman's Mother came in and she shouted at Cartman for getting Cat's blood all over the floor so he stabbed her too. Then he opened his Cheesy Poofs but the knife was too blunt so in his frustration he popped the bag and the Poofs went everywhere so he bent down to pick them up but he was holding the knife in his hand and he tripped over the bodies and the knife went flying into his brain so he died. Then, It cut to an episode of Family Guy. It was the one where Brian died and the camera just zoomed in on his dead body and then it cut back to the South Park sign and it looked grey/gray. And then, It cut to Mister Mackey the school counselor and he was shouting at Stan and Kyle saying that they were expelled but oddly enough, in his entire speech, he never said his trademark "M'kay" and then Stan stood up from the chair and said a prayer to Jesus and Jesus came flying through the window with an AK-47 and shot Mister Mackey dead but then Kyle, who was Jewish, asked Stan why Jesus was here and then Stan called Kyle a dumbass which was very out of character for him because that's usually something that Cartman would do and then Stan got out a sword and chopped Jesus and Kyle's heads off and then commited ritual seppuku. And then it zoomed in on the dead bodies of Kenny, Cartman, Kyle, Stan, Cartman's Cat, Cartman's Mother, Mister Mackey, Jesus and Brian from Family Guy and then was a video of Trey Parker and Matt Stone killing themselves and the caption after was "your next" and I checked the Youtube Comments but all of the Youtubers said it was fake and when I checked back the next day, the video was gone! YOUR NEXT!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Wall of Text
Category:YOU'RE NEXT
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
South Park S21E1: White People Renovating Houses (Original Version)

The plot where Cartman and Heidi falling in love and Randy and Sharon starting White People Renovating Houses.
The different version is after the events of the original The End of Serialization as We Know It, Shelia was still in the asylum, started to feel remorse after what she had done from a cell after many days of starvation and she loses weight for 28 days. After killing Kyle and Ike, she sat in a cell feeling about what she done.
Gerald, however, still weeping for the loss of Kyle and Ike, he was about to commit suicide when Gerald hears knocking on the door. All the things in the sitting that Gerald watching home videos on TV, feeling bad when he should've understand why Kyle is talking to him in the deleted scene of Fort Collins, he began crying and crying until his eyes were red from all the crying.
"I hate my fucking life. I-I want Kyle back. I should have never married Sheila. I-I wish Kyle was here rather than her. What kind of a fucking husband am iiiiiiiiii." Gerald sobbed and drinking whiskey.
After she was released, Sheila tells everyone that she killed Kyle and Ike over a website of Skankhunt, which enraged Sharon, Liane, Carol and other wives and loses respect from her with Sharon telling Sheila to lose weight and Liane calls Sheila a murdering cow.
Matt and Trey rewrote the scene.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Suicide
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Shortpasta
South Park VHS Tape - Evil Kenny

Have you heard of that American Televison Show called South Park?. It follows the misadventures of four irreverent grade-schoolers in the quiet,dysfuntional town of South Park,Colorado. The cuiorous,adventure-seeking,fourth grade group of 10 year old boys, Stan,Kenny,Cartman,and Kyle that all jump in buffoonish adventures that sometimes evolve nothing. I was going to the DVD Store to buy something but soemthing caught my eye. There was a South Park VHS Tape which was called South Park: Evil Kenny,I brought it and went in my Luxury Car and drove home. I put DVD In my cable an it begin to play. It started with the Intro but it had messed up quaitly and was slowed down at 0.4X and when It went to Kenny's Part,his voice sounded really demonic as he says I have a 10 inch p*nis,use your mouth if you wanna clean it. Then it went to the epsiode but it was Roger Elbert Should Lay Off the Fatty Foods. It was the same epsiode?! But I got to at admit,at least nothing is real demonic,unlike Kenny dieing all the time,When Kenny's head explodes with blood,Kyle and Stan say OMG THEY KILLED KENNY,YOU BASTARD but the epsiode was slowed at 0.4X like the intro. until Kenny is revived unrealistically and is demonic. He grown Devil horns,Has black eyes now,bleeding from his black eyes,and has spider legs,Stan and Kyle run and cry for there parents,and Kenny said in a demonic tone that nobody can save them,Kyle warned Stan to run faster but Kenny got Kyle and Stan with his Spider legs. Kenny decapited Stan and ate his head and decapited Kyle. Cartman saw everything and ran as fast as he can but failed and decapited him. The screen went black for a good 3 seconds until it reaveled the hill,the sky is red,the graphics still have low quailty,and Kenny is singing the theme song in a demonic tone and is singing it in reverse. With Stan,Kyle and Cartman dead in the backround. It showed a hebrew text that I couldn't understand at all and it had Sonic.EXE's Green Hill Zone music. I was mad after watching this tape. Matt and Trey wouldn't go that Far!. This isn't the Kenny I knew. That was a Mutated,Spider Formed,Devilish Monster. I called South Park Studios/Matt and Trey but they were screaming and It didn't sound like a joke and I heard blood noises and the call ended. I trashed the DVD Player and never watched South Park again. If you see this tape at the DVD Store....DON'T BUY IT BECAUSE ITCOULDRUINYOURCHILDHOODOFYOURFAVORITECHARACTERLIKEKENNNYskhdiajsihadiuhsfuihuiafhusafs, Did you Get My Message (Scott?) - Kenny
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Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:English Class Failure
Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Crappy ms paint drawings
Southpark.avi

One day I was on my $2000 gaming PC watching gay furry porn when suddenly I got an ad for a bizarre South Park episode. The ad was Randy spreading his hairy cheeks; I hit the jackpot! You know I clicked on it. It then took me to a website called "SlutPark.com" filled with many vile videos. Yummy! One of them had a thumbnail with the same image as the ad so I clicked it harder than the first plane hit the Twin Towers.
The video started with a disclaimer that apparently this was a never seen before episode that was too explicit for television. The episode started with Randy in his room. He was slowly taking his clothes off. Once he took everything but his underwear off, it then cut to SQUIDWARD GETTING FUCKING DIED WITH A KNIFE BY SONIC.EXE OH SHIT! That was scary and turned me off! Hopefully Comedy Central will sue whoever made this into poverty. The fuckers behind knew many others like me find Randy really hot and would fall for this but it's not my fault!
After that, the episode cut to Stan at a dinner table. He heard loud moaning noises. It then revealed that it was Randy jacking off to a photo of me Irl. That's when I realized I had a chance. I used my #y/n powers to go through my screen and find Randy. Randy kissed me on the lips. His wife then walked in. She was more shocked than when I found out that Chris Chan just got bailed out of prison.
"Randy! How could you?" She screamed.
"Y/N is hot and sexy and I don't love you anymore!" Randy exclaimed.
Randy was right and packed his bags and bought us a condo on the beach and we had 2 cats, no a hamster, and we got married. That's really it. I don't know what else to say. Go away now.
"Do you say this shit to other people? I don't think that I could." - Lizzo, "Coldplay"
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:File Extensions
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Shortpasta
Sp00ky Consoles

My name is Kyle.
I saw Bill Gates present his new tax-paying love machine called the Xbone. After he finished his presentation by showing us HYPER-REALISTIC pictures of dead Martian aliens, all of the demons in the crowd sung of the wonders Hypersoft would bring us. I believed the hype.
666 years later, I went to my local Publix, the first museum for pubes, to buy one. The old man working alone there gave me one for the low low price of 666,666,666 thousand dollars. One thing that made me slightly uneasy was the box glowing red, with blood leaking out. I didn't want to be rude to the old man now floating in circles, so I took it home anyway. I was so excited that I threw my head at passers-by, and they winked and gave me thumbs up.
I think you can understand my excitement; I was a huge XBAX fan, just like everyone else in the universe. But I wasn't Commander Keen on keeping up with gaming news, so I made one fatal mistake.
I ran home, decapitating anybody who got in my way. As soon as I stepped onto the comforting familiarity of my carpet made out of the skin of Egyptian pharaoes, I threw the box at my television, causing the Kinect (also known as stupid gimickey idiocy) eye to glow red. After turning the system on and getting familiar with the interfeces, I got up to get my game that I bought from GameFlop before I got the console. The game was called "The Square Enix Chronicles XIII: POINTLESS RELIGIOUS PROPERTIES." After unscrewing the box to put the game in, I sat down on my human-skin couch, getting ready for the epic may-mays to spray from my every pore.
The title screen blinked for a second, and in that one second I was able to describe every detail about it: blood, blood, and the main protagobitch with her eyes leaking blood. 
I thought it was just a glitch, so I continued.
And then I saw something that made me freak out...
The main menu was missing the EXTRAS OPTION!
And as I was having a tantrum on the floor, the system's main mechanic finally activated.
You see, the fatal flaw I made was that...
THE GAME I GOT FROM GAMEFLOP WAS USED!
The console proceeded to spit acid into my eyes and castrate me with its robotic claw.
And now that I am a slave in the chambers of HyperSoft headquarters, I give you one last message...
"12/10 Like Skyrim with guns" -IGNSTD
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck