Green Eggs and Ham

Sam I Am
I am Sam. Sam I Am.
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
That Sam I Am! That Sam I Am! He really knows how to get under my skin! I do not like that Sam I Am! I do not like that Sam I am!
Sam I Am
Do you like green eggs and ham?
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
HELL NO!
Sam I Am
Would you eat them at a house? Would you eat them with a mouse? Would you eat them if it was to live or die? Would you eat them with a bi? Would you eat them in near years?
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them Sam I Am! I will not eat them at a house, I will not eat them with a mouse. I will not eat them if it was to live or die, I will not eat them with a bi. I will not eat them in near years, you can shove them in your ears. Call me loco, I don't care. I will kill your family, this I swear. I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am! I will not eat them at a house, not with a mouse, to live or die, or with a bi, and I don't care, and this I swear! I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am!
__NOTOC__
== I will not eat them! ==
Sam I Am
Weeeeeellll theeenn, mister! Will you eat them near or far? Will you eat them at a bar? If you'd become a famous star? Would you eat them after you steal a car? Would you if you had mar with it? Would you? Oh, would you? I know you give a shit! Eat them, for I refuse to get my fucking ass out of your fuckin' way! Would you while you hardcore game? Would you? Oh baby, could you, with your shame?
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am. I will not eat them near or far, I will no eat them while at a bar. I will not eat them if I'd become a star, I will not eat them after I steal a car. I will not eat them if I had mar with it, here me out, I don't give a shit. I will not eat them with a gay, I will not eat them, get your fucking ass out of my fuckin' way. I will not eat them while I game, I will not eat them even with my shame. I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am! I will not eat them at a house, not with a mouse, to live or die, or with a bi, I don't care, this I swear, near or far, while at a bar, if I'd be a star, after I steal a car, if I had mar with it, I don't give a shit, not with a gay, get your cunt-ass out of my effin' way, not while I game, nor even with my shame! I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am.
== I will not FUCKING eat them ==
Sam I Am
Oh, baby, oh! I love it when you play hard to get! Oh, babe, yeeesssss! Would you if I dared you? If I made you? While you inject drugs? Would you rather be raped by heaps of thugs? Will you at a club? Would you eat them on on Porn Hub? While at church? On Google Search? At school? Skinny dipping in my pool, baby? What about on Minecraft? In a shaft? While you watch my sexy body strip? With ? Tell me, baby, TELL ME!
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am. I will not eat them if you dare me, I will not eat them if you try to make me. I will not eat them while injecting drugs, I'd rather be raped by heaps of thugs. I will not eat them at a club, I will not eat them while on Porn Hub. I will not eat them while at church, I will not eat them while on Google Search. I will not eat them at a school, I will not eat them while skinny dipping in my pool. I will not eat them while on Minecraft, I will not eat them in a shaft. I will not eat them while I strip, I will not eat them with Kip the Dip! I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am! I will not eat them at a house, not with a mouse, to live or die, or with a bi, I don't care, this I swear, near or far, while at a bar, if I'd be a star, after I steal a car, if I had mar with it, I don't give a shit, not with a gay, get your cunt-ass out of my effin' way, not while I game, nor with my shame, if you dare me, if you try to make me, while injecting drugs, I'd rather be raped by thugs, not at a club, while on Porn Hub, not at church, not on Google Search, not at school, while skinny dipping in a pool, not on Minecraft, not in a shaft, while I strip, or with Kip the Dip! I will not eat green eggs and ham, I will not eat them, Sam I Am.
== I WILL FUCKING NEVER EAT GODDAMN MOTHAFUCKING GREEN EGGS AND GREEN CUNT-ASS HAM MOTHERFUCKER FAGGOT ==
Sam I Am
Will you wi-
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
I WILL NOT EAT THEM AT A HOUSE, NOT WITH A MOUSE, TO LIVE OR DIE, OR WITH A BI, I DON'T CARE, THIS I SWEAR, NEAR OR FAR, WHILE AT A BAR, IF I'D BE A STAR, AFTER I STEAL A CAR, IF I HAD MAR WITH IT, I DON'T GIVE A SHIT, NOT WITH A GAY, GET YOUR CUNT-ASS OUT OF MY EFFIN' WAY, NOT WHILE I GAME, NOR WITH MY SHAME, IF YOU DARE ME, IF YOU TRY TO MAKE ME, WHILE INJECTING DRUGS, I'D RATHER BE RAPED BY THUGS, NOT AT A CLUB, WHILE ON PORN HUB, NOT AT CHURCH, NOT ON GOOGLE SEARCH, NOT AT SCHOOL, WHILE SKINNY DIPPING IN A POOL, NOT ON MINECRAFT, NOT IN A SHAFT, WHILE I STRIP, OR WITH KIP THE DIP! I WILL NOT EAT GREEN EGGS AND HAM, I WILL NOT EAT THEM, SAM I AM!
Sam I Am
please?
Anonymous Guy in Hat with Bad Attitude
== After ==
After this, Sam I Am killed himself. Fin.
== See also ==
Green
Eggs
Ham
Green Ketchup
pt:Ovos Verdes e Presunto
Category:American literature
category:Food
Category:Works By Dr. Seuss
Category:Pages that look like the things they're about