Australian Empire

The Australian Empire (From 2993 BC to 1788) was a very powerful empire in the island of Australia, that got completely wiped off anyone's mind when the dang brits arrived. They were very powerful, though.
==History==
The history of the Australian Empire is divided into pre-grébretann and pos-grébretann(names derived from the Astraiyan language).
===Pre-grébretann===
As said before, this country was entirely omitted of being known of by the brits, so it is not referenced in the History of Australia. In 3000 BC, the Erva-mate EmpireThis empire is nowadays referred to as the Guaraní tribe, which is in the same location. that controlled Paraguay and the brazilian state called Paraná(by exploding the largest mate ever, Iguazú Falls), sailed across the Antarctic Ocean and arrived in a huge island they called Australian, because upon arriving they found a lion from Austria.
They realized the island's waters only went one way, inward, so they were stuck there. Then, toghether with the aboriginal population and all wild animals on the island(emus, giant spiders, kangaroos, etc), they formed a very powerful empire, the Australian Empire. This empire was so strong, that if they could travel to other continents, in a century they would conquer the world.
And for the rest, passed 4-and-a-half millenias of no major changes in the island, a time nicknamed Pax Australia by nerds. The most important event was in 500 BC, with Mount Eruptus and Mount Volcanus erupting at the same time, attracting a few million foreigners who were violently sprinkled across the island after setting up an enormous australiaphobic dock called "per the law, this land is cursed"(shortened to the first 5 letters, Perth).
===Pos-grébretann===
After many events, such as the double eruption(500 BC), the Coin-lands-on-side incident(1000 BC), the founding of a religion(1500 BC), the blowing up of a ship dressed as a whale(2000 BC), the Party Pooper Party(1000), the predicting of the "Brits-will-land" phropecy(788), eh, I could list these goofy things all day... anyways, in 1788, it happened.
One of the prophecies in the religious book "Currito hay nota Australian" claims in 1788 some very evil empire by the name of Grébretann will appear and conquer the island. The british, realizing they could be proven evil, immeadiately destroyed all evidence of this "Australian Empire" and everything they had done, instead creating a new country, similar to the former at first, but severely brainwashed. The new country was called Australia, and any civilization before it was called "Aboriginals". Secret, by the way, before 1788 the brits also created 3 islands called "Tasmania", "New Zealand(south island)" and "New Zealand(north island)" to easen the invasion of Australian.
==Religion==
The religion of the Australian Empire was Curristianism. Curritianism comes from the name of their god, Currito. The religion was founded in 1500 BC. Here are the first verses of their holy book(translated to English).
 And so, by 1492 BC, everyone in Australian had converted to this big heresy. Very unfourtunate, indeed.
==Sports==
According to Curristians, in 1491 BC a flying pig made a smooth landing into the grass, and that is how the Australian Empire was introduced to sports.
However, nerds, once again, decided this unnatural pig stuff was made up because, like the first ever nerd said, "If it's holy it ain't surely". However, some nerds disagree, tweeting #ItsHolyAndSurely. 
Anyway, Durrito's speech caused the Australian Empire to start doing races, and the best runner was Chimarruto XVI, which became king of the country. Every time the king died, a new race would be disputed, decided the aussies.
== Notes ==
 
Category:Historical Nonsense