A creepy tale

Why hello there! I think you're saying to yourself "Oh goody! A creepy tale to read while I'm bored!" well guess what? You're wrong bucko! Instead, I'm going to tell you of one the most, actually, THE most generic and run of the mill creepy tales/creepypastas you've ever heard! So, turn off all the lights, take a seat, and read this thing that I have created. It all starts with a boy named Herman. He is the average bullied protagonist of this tale that you might have seen in over a million creepypastas(probably) already. He is bullied by some generic bully jock named Kyle who is pretty annoying like every bully on this rock we call Earth. Herman really wants something good to happen in his life because, "Oh no!", almost everyone hates him for some reason because we need some "grounded" stuff to happen to really "immerse" you in the story! 
Herman was busy walking home because his parents were busy being mean and abusive since we need some edgy drama for this to be truly a creepypasta. When Herman was busy walking on the sidewalk(at night), a really suspicious person in a hoody whose gender is unidentifiable gives him a strange nintendy 65 cartridge with the name "Mr.Twoodle Twiddle Fart.EXE" scribbled on it. The strange person then dissappeared without a trace...Herman then thought "Hmmm instead of throwing this cartridge which could be dangerous I'm gonna take it home because the story needs to progress SOMEHOW." So when Herman arrived home, he went past his parents. His mother was busy cooking slop, and his father was busy being that one generic drunk and abusive father slumped down on the couch watching TV with god knows how many opened cans of Red Bull right beside the couch. 
I wonder why he doesn't get wings? Herman then goes up the stairs to his room which is filled with "Spupa Maryo" posters. He then grabs his Nintendy 64(Conveniently, I might add), puts the cartridge into the console, and the game boots up. The game shows the opening logos, and eventually reaches the game's opening scene, which shows the logo of the game. The words "Mr. Twoodle Twiddle Fart" appear, with each letter gleaming in glory. Twoodle then shoots down the letters with his iconic Fart rifle, while doing his iconic finger wave(hm, oddly familiar, no?). Herman smiles like a dummy, until the entire rainbow backround goes blood red and Mr.Twoodle has hyper-realistic glowing red eyes with an eeeeeevil grin on his face. 
The game opens to 3 save files, which look strikingly familiar from Sonic da hedgehawg tree. The three save files are laid out infront of yet ANOTHER blood red backround. Each save file has the iconic characters(Cough cough, NPCS, cough cough) from the game. The only playable character is Peanut. A peanut with a face. The other two characters are locked behind a paywall. Herman, now a tad bit more scared, selects Peanut.
Suddenly, a stock evil laugh sfx plays in the backround. Now Herman is rweally scwared. The level, called "Candy", is that one sweets level from the game. There is a really big lack of level design for some reason. As Peanut kept going foward, the level starts to...Get spoopy. The colors are suddenly muted. The level is gray now, and the sky is red also. Herman then mutters to himself "Oh dearest me, cweepy." Then, OH NOES!!!!! Gore! Lots of it! And dead enemies! Herman pisses his pants. Then, he sees...Twoodle? But then...Ya know, I think this turned into a full blown parody of Sonic.EXE so let's just reboot the story beacuse this even isn't a parody of most creepypastas out there. 
Let's back track to the sidewalk. As Herman is walking home, he suddenly notices that some random guy is following him. Herman then notices the stalker following him and says "Bro stop following me or else witness my wrath." The stalker kept going until...Herman stared into the Stalker's soul. The stalker stopped and started to sweat and peed his pants...Jeez I've said that word twice and I think I have lost a braincell. The stalker screams like a girl and runs away like a sissy. Herman now feels more confident than ever, and feels like a sigma(I have grown several tumors behind my back saying this just now).
Herman returns home, now a reformed kid. On the next morning, he does everything by himself and suprises his parents. He calls child services like a person with common sense and sooner gets adopted by a great family. When he arrives to school, Kyle is about to call Herman a fat turd, but then Herman gets Kyle in the balls. The end. Wow! Betcha didn't see that coming! Never guessed that the protagonist turns into a gigachad in the end, and, a good ending! So, move on, and do something better with your life. 
Category:Trollpasta
Category:The Title Is A Lie
Category:Satire
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:English Class Failure