Sophia

~o~
For those of you whoadore Wikipedia,here is Sophia
~o~
~o~
Sophia beautypout your lips and thrust your bustwiggle that booty!
~o~
Sophia is athirty-eight twenty-seventhirty-six. 'Nuff said.
—Oscar Wilde on Sophia
~o~
What is Sophia?
A person, or a concept?
Sophia is... HOT!!!
~o~
__TOC__
==Here's to Sophia==
~o~
Liquid eyes see through all,
mind, heart, all body parts nice,
mouth so warm and wet
~o~
Sophia, like a
Bond Girl, though she wouldn't hang
Out or chill with me
~o~
הו, סופיה
עינייך כמעיינות!
חבל רק, שאת בת 87.
~o~
You are my inspiration
The power of dreams
~o~
I really need more sleep
Sophia must wake me up
Before she go go
~o~
Chinese Sophia
I can not understand her
She`s talking Chinese
~o~
It snows outside now
Sophia makes a snowman
Some guys destroy it
~o~
All hail cheese burgers
Made by Sophia with cheese
And with some Burghers
~o~
Sophia means what?
Well, "sohpia" means knowledge
In the Greek language.
~o~
Sophia yang agung
Disangka mengandung
Ternyata kembung.
~o~
Hot-damn what a babe
I'd do her in a second
Raw and uncensored
~o~
Like the Sun, she shines,
Like the great blue sky, she glows,
Like the sea, she's... wet.
~o~
I think: Sophia
and Onomatopoeia.
Now that's a big word.
~o~
Sophia runs far.
Where are you going, beauty?
Into the SMITEHOLES.
~o~
Sophia needs you
In a whimper of lost sighs
Never with a tear
~o~
Sophia, like joke
You make me giggle so much
But for other reason
~o~
Soapy Sophia
Slides slowly into a bath
The sound of water
~o~
蘇菲蘇菲
今吾先親近之
期從者眾
~o~
All I've ever known
is Uncyclopedia.
Bless us, Sophia.
~o~
Sophia desires
Some quiet time by the fire
With champagne and ice
~o~
Sophia enjoys
Sitting in a small dank cave
Wond'ring 'bout the world
~o~
Noble Sophia
I'd like to purchase for you
Many Klondike bars
~o~
Oh, geil, Sophia!
Ich rich an deinem Fud-Furz
Den ganzen Tag lang!
~o~
Aking Sophia,
Trips ko bigyan kita ng
sako ng bigas.
~o~
In the afternoon
Making love to Sophia
Up in my bedroom
~o~
Purt your breasts beauty
Ye, For you are Sophia
Sexy like a bear
Tämä on selvää:
moni Sofia-luulee,
vaan ei Sofia.
~o~
Gentle goddess of
cherry blossoms and of wine:
Sophia, I'm thine
~o~
Of Loren was born
sexy Sophia, so fap
Her crotch draws me in
~o~
ソフィアさん
あなたは酷い
でも凄い
~o~
Dreamy Sophia
You are my inspiration
The power of dreams.
~o~
Water wear stone away
Will undying devotion
melt Sophia's heart?
~o~
Люблю Софию!
Глаза-прожектора её
Я не забуду.
~o~
月圓之夜
乃思家之時
蘇菲也同？
九月十八
恰逢一花甲
誰人能忘？
~o~
내 님 소피아
쭉쭉빵빵 헤벌레
나는 기절 중
~o~
Sophia, dearest,
please put that dagger away.
I'll be good. Honest.
~o~
סופיה, עינייך הן
כמו השמש העולה
הן יפות ועצובות
~o~
Ka Sophia es
Muliero qua manjis
Saporoz' Hilter?
~o~
סופיה שלי
מה מלאו לחייך דם
ושדייך חלב
~o~
Sophia, vous avez
Mon coeur dans une petite boite
Et sur l'Internet
~o~
Sophia is great
Sophia is beautiful
Goddess: Sophia
~o~
Sophiang ina!
Reyna ng french fries at chips
Chibugan tayo!
~o~
We hail Sophia!
But in Soviet Russia,
Sophia hails US!
~o~
Sophia, for real
Smiling at me as we dine
Spinach on her tooth
~o~
Sophia is cool,
Sophia is fucking fine,
Stop wasting her time.
~o~
Софіє! Вона
Найімовірніше є
Ліпша од цього.
~o~
Sophia's in bed.
She snores like a lumberjack.
Sleepless, I love her.
~o~
A pretty girl named
María once said to me:
Sofía is Truth;
Sophia, goddess
of the people like we, that
live for little things;
One beautiful day
you will answer my prayers,
and she will be mine.
~o~
Listen up Sophia
I just wrote you a Haiku
And you just heard it
~o~
Cara Sophia,
Quando a olho penso,
"Gandas mamas, hã?"
~o~
==Sophia's Mythology==
~o~
Everyone should know
The Goddess and potato
Are two different things.
~o~
An Asian Goddess
but with an odd name surely
not Shirley, you git.
~o~
Sophia commands
A dark avatar on Earth...
Sophia Loren!
~o~
Sophia is one
With her mind, body and soul
Oh, to be as free.
~o~
Pure as rain water
Radiant like the night moon
Warm as summer sun
Bending as young tree
Comforting as a spring breeze
Such is Sophia
~o~
Such beauty, divine,
Lips more luscious than fine wine,
Redder than a rose.
~o~
With five and seven
our Uncyclopedia
enshrines Sophia
~o~
La saĝ' malsaĝa
De la bela Sofio
Sensencigas nin.
~o~
I lurve Sophia
Sophia lurves, too, me
Sophia's so hot!
~o~
Golden light surrounds
Sophia's serenity
Yeah, bring it on, bitch!
~o~
Me gustaria
Hacer el sexo con la
Sophia. Es bien
~o~
Sophia, Oscar
Their union gave rise to Un-
Cyclopedia
Burn to she perfumes!
Drink to she, for I love she!
Nuit! Sophia!
~o~
Not the same but well
our lovely potato is
too named Sophia
~o~
Carry on, tater
You're Kansas' wayward son
Your job: Never done
~o~
During her travels
Sophia once met this man
who asked this question:
O queen of wisdom,
Sophia, what the heck am
I doing here? Sheesh.
To which she replied:
Asking me stupid questions
Or so it would seem.
Just kidding, good man.
You are here to discover
the answer you seek
~o~
蘇菲蘇菲
生大荒山,無稽崖
空空妙妙
子虚烏有
曾隨長卿遊
回遊於此
~o~
Monkey Monkey Ape
Monkey Sophia Monkey
Ape Love Sophia
~o~
சோஃபியா லாரன்
நான் பின்னாலே வாரன்
உன் முகத்தப் பாத்தாலே மனசுக்குள்ள ஆரன்
~o~
Sophia, real
Smiling at me as we dine
Spinach on her tooth
~o~
Sophia, goddess
Of Uncyclopedia
Gives me a hard-on
==Blasphemous Haiku==
~o~
Sophia smells like
Rancid suppositories
In the winter rain
~o~
Sophia oh dear
She ate bad jam and catfood
She just chundered lots
~o~
Sophia Peeing
Urine falls from the heavens
I'm getting stinky
~o~
Sophia is mean,
She has fucked Michael Jackson,
But hasn't fucked me.
~o~
ソフィア姫
はめてちょうだい
中に来る
~o~
Sophia posed naked
When she was seventy-one
Wrinkled as scrotum
~o~
When the bough breaks, the
Cradle will rock. And she will
Give us all blow jobs.
~o~
Sumo Sophia
Your thunder thighs crush the earth
Kill Godzilla now
~o~
Sophia's a whore
She takes it up the behind
Ok, what the fuck
Here in my sandbox,
I play with my Tonka truck.
Sophia eats dirt.
~o~
Sophia, Sophie
Sew fee, A sofa, so fuh-
geddaboutit, man
~o~
What dream makes us slave
For Uncyclopedia?
Shagging Sophia
~o~
An old lore proclaims
Sophia had a sex change
He still has one ball
~o~
You have two cows, and
cherry blossoms on the wind--
The sound of mooing
~o~
Sophia, my love,
They say you give great head, but
I'm disappointed
~o~
I yearn to put my
cock into Sophia's cunt.
Make her orgasm
~o~
Sliding slowly down
The blood traces down my leg
Drink it, Sophia
~o~
==~o~==
~o~
Table of contents
ought to also be Haiku
Needed a break here
~o~
==The Meta Haiku==
~o~
To write a haiku:
Syllables five seven five
Each on their own line
~o~
With five, seven, five,
We show Sophia a love
One man holds for her
~o~
No one told me the
right way to write a Haiku
this last line has too many syllables
~o~
Sophia's first line
And this is her second line
And this her third line.
~o~
Five Seven and Five
Sophia hates all retards
Who can not count right
-o-
If you can not count
put your haikus in section
"Not Haiku, thank you"
~o~
Though a master shuns
full linear narrative
An antelope farts
~o~
Haiku: a verse form.
Heptadekasyllabic,
in three lines, like these.
~o~
Of course, none of these
Are haikus, anyway; no
Symbols of nature
~o~
(reply)
that's ridiculous
perhaps there are exceptions
but all is nature.
~o~
Haiku now easy
You only need skill to count
And skill to bullshit
~o~
See, look at this here.
I can write a good haiku.
Can you write one too?
~o~
Any moron can
write haiku; just stop at the
seventeenth syllab–
~o~
The Haiku Meter:
Five syllables, then seven,
and five more finish.
~o~
Haiku are strange poems.
They don't typically rhyme
though one does, this time.
~o~
Damn Haiku Nazis
Chime in with "FIVE SEVEN FIVE!!!"
This is really just...
A strict western in-
terpretation of what should
be sublime. Word. Yo.
The meta haiku
Describes poems with rhythm
But can they dance too?
~o~
Haiku addiction
You cannot just stop at one
You'll write too many
~o~
Haiku and humour
What clever wit wrote this shit?
I don't get the jokes
~o~
Lots of these haikus
Are in different formats, like
This list, right below:
sometimes they have no
caps or punctuation and
lots of misspellings
Maybe it'll have
Caps and punctuation; their
Authors read and write.
Möglicherweise
ist das haiku in eine
andere Sprache.
Make all poems same
format, so if that happens
delete these five poems.
~o~
Intervene, I do
Sitting under falling leaves
Haikus must have nature
~o~
The jay does not count
Her Spring-time song at dawn:
She only exhales
~o~
The Haiku infinite;
every time you finish
someone writes one more
~o~
Just for the record
This is the last haiku of
The meta Haiku
~o~
Last haiku no more
This one replaces it now
Let's all write poems
~o~
Haiku's are easy
But sometimes they don't make sense
Refrigerator
~o~
In Secondary School,
I learnt the boring flat rules,
Of Japanese Haiku.
~o~
A Meta Haiku
Is a frightful thought for us too,
Please think it through!
~o~
Peršyj ŕadok ce
A ce je, pevno, druhyj
Tož maješ xajku.
~o~
==Miscellaneous Haiku==
~o~
A A A A A
A A A A A A A
A A A A A!
~o~
Some add their haiku
to the start; some to the end.
I guess I'll do both.
~o~
My thumb extended
It is for her I compose
this, my Hitch Haiku
~o~
Sophia is hot
In much the way the sun is
Twelve million degrees
~o~
I'm sure Sophia
Is the capital city
Of Bulgaria
~o~
Sophia was right
This site is offline at night
Need twelve sided dice
~o~
ソフィアさん
本買う道で
拾う猫
~o~
this is pathetic
these angry lines of winter
begging for your crotch
~o~
Vão tomar no cu
Vão se foder
Americanos são todos viados
~o~
Sandwiches are great
Peanut Butter and Jelly
Beats out deli meat
~o~
Almighty goddess
Please save me from school's boredom
Save me, Sophia
~o~
Semitemos sdrawkcab sdrow
Era gniyonna fi uoy
Era gninrael ot dear
~o~
This section thinks it's
Better than the others for
Having three columns
Regards Sophia
my old internet browser
cuts and pastes bold o's
~o~
I'm eager to know
if there are any words that
can't be used here but
the problem with this
is of course that you couldn't
tell them to me here
~o~
Sophia Sophi
a Sophia Sophia
Sophia Sophi
~o~
Lame running gag from
Luxembourg makes Sophia
shed a bitter tear
~o~
Parsley and Garlic
Sophia uses them well
for Spaghetti Sauce
~o~
Oh please Sophia
Take it off for us to see
Would you look like this?
~o~
(reply)
No, she wouldn't, 'cause
The potato is only
Named after Sophie.
~o~
There are 10 kinds of
people: those who know bina-
ry and those who don't
~o~
Crying cockles and
Mussels, alive, alive oh.
And, erm, Sophia
~o~
Online pharmacy
Have longer and better sex
More info? Click Here
~o~
here is my pet rock
it died a few days ago
THE NATION WILL WEEP
~o~
I love you bacon
You have no haiku I found
So I wrote you one
~o~
I believe that So-
phia is okay although
Athena's better
Newest haikus are
not seen much down here, but it's
chronological.
~o~
Japanese poems
are so darn short that they can
barely say any-
~o~
No, I disagree.
Antidisestablishment-
arianism.
~o~
I once saw a cow
It was a very big cow
It mooed quite loudly.
~o~
And now for something
Completely different, lo!
Spam, spam, spam, spam, SPAM!
~o~
Procrastination
My one destination when
Sophia has gone
~o~
Damnit if only
Sophia would impeach that
Friggin' POTUS dude.
~o~
Snowman in a field
listening to the raindrops
wishing him fairwell
~o~
Sofjo stolico
Bułgarii - grząską myślą
zażółć gęślą jaźń
~o~
My name's Sophia.
No, really, I'm serious.
Worship me, you fools.
~o~
I called to the wind,
Who's there? Sophia it was
Still knocks at my gate.
~o~
penis penis penis
penis penis penis 
penis Sophia.
~o~
Masturbation
the only explanation
for Sophia on-screen.
==Not Haiku, thank you==
~o~
Sophia, goddess
of haiku, smites the wicked
with a big red stamp
~o~
Use the tag line for
Indicating non-haikus
Bless'd by Sophia
~o~
NOT HAIKU
There once was a girl called Sophia
Who refused to show us her rear
So with much kitten huffing
And Oscar Wilde guffing
We set up a site click right here: Naked Sophia
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Ow Sophia. How can I?
Sophia... Wow. How should I?
Hohoho Sophia.
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia oh Sophia
oh Sophia...
...Screw it.
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia just wished
For some fine dishes
of lobster knishes
~o~
NOT HAIKU
lobster knishes
do not exist; if they did
it would violate kashruth
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Oh Sophia, one day I`ll tell you
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia is I think
A god of some thinkadink
And worship we must
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia is against
The pretty Polis
But you need to be French
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia so sexy!
Sophia so fine!
I want to fuck her in the behind
~o~
NOT HAIKU
S is for Sophia
O is for Oh!
Phia is what's left
NOT HAIKU
Sophia loves
Counting syllables
In poetry
~o~
NOT HAIKU
不懂……
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Oh Sophia, one day I`ll tell you
Oh dear Sophie, fruit of my loins
Makes stiff many little boy's groins
Wearing shirts tighter than sixty virgins
Makes old men jump out of their skins
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia labia
Massage them gently
She has two cows
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Now here's a word that
won't fit into a haiku:
pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
~o~
Who is Sophia?
What is she?
That all our swains commend her?
Holy, fair,
And wise is she
The Heav'ns such grace did lend her
|: - That adored she might be. :|
Is she kind as
She is fair?
For beauty lives with kindness;
To her eyes
Love doth repair
To help him of his blindness;
|: And being help'd in habits there. :|
Then to Sophia
Let us sing,
That Sophia is excelling;
She excels
Each mortal thing
Upon the dull Earth dwelling;
|: - To her garlands let us bring. :|
NOT HAIKU
How are you gentlemen!
All your base are belong to us.
You are on the way to destruction.
~o~
ZLATIBORIAN NON-HAIKU
Я сам дивно женско име,
аiде, ђаче, погоди ме!
Податке ти даѥм ове:
у сущедноi ѥдноi земљи
главни град се тако зове
ко што се зовем и я.
Знаш да ѥ то София!
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Hope she likes Tanka
I'm not in a haiku mood
Tired and drunk, too.
Yet the thought of Sophia
Compels me to write for her.
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia, could
you pick up some milk on your way home?
~o~
NOT HAIKU, BUT COMPELLING NONETHELESS
My large dog
has a thing for all things chocolate and Sophia.
~o~
NOT HAIKU
System.out.println("Sophia.equals(hot)"):
System.out.println("I'd do her".RightHereOnTheBathroomFloor):
System.out.println("Please come to my house and hang out with me, Sophia"):
System.out.println("I want to play Mario with you"):
System.out.println("Naked"):
~o~
ไม่เป็นไฮกุ (NOT HAIKU)
อันไซโคลพีเดียของโซเฟีย
โซเฟียครองโลก
โซเฟียครองพิภพ
~o~
NOT HAIKU
Sophia, who did know
That, behind the farm house you
did one day show me
What I so wanted
to see, to touch, to feel
your very own sex (appeal)
~o~
Those last entries were
definitely not haiku
Sophia feels shame
~o~
How can none of these
people in the last section
even COUNT at all?
~o~
==~o~==
~o~
For other pages
see disambiguation
about Sophia
~o~
Additional
disambiguation our
Sophia has here
~o~
There is something else
similar to a haiku
it's called a Tanka
~o~
==Notes for Sophia==
~o~
Thank you Sophia
For all of the laughs you gave
To us common fools
~o~
Sophia, Sophia,
I wonder. Every second, I wonder.
Can you hand me the beer?
Sophia, could you,
Also pick up some more beer?
I am seeing things.
~o~
Do me a favor,
Keep this just between us two,
my wife gets jealous.
~o~
==And this middle haiku line==
~o~
Haiku shall this be
For to honor Sophia
Says master Yoda
~o~
Here you are alone
But in Soviet Russia
Sophia fuck YOU!!
~o~
I've tried to write a
Haiku, but I wound up one
Syllable short.
~o~
==To finish the page==
~o~
And so we shall leave
This page in the wake of them
The haiku are gone
~o~
 
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Category:Boobage
Category:Church of Uncyclopedia
Category:De facto rulers of the world
Category:Documents
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