nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Hitler is in my copy of Wolfenstein: The New Colossus

Mandatory "This didn't happen today", but two years ago, I bought Wolfenstein: The New Colossus, I got to the part where you meet Hitler on Venus, but he looked into the camera, and said, "Dennis, denkst du, das ist nur ein Spiel?" I got scared, since my name is Dennis, and then Hitler shot the Camera, and the screen broke. Hitler then began crawling out of the screen, but he looked like he did in 1945. He aimed his gun, but I ran to the bathroom and phoned the Cops, and told them that an insane madman is in my house, and Hitler was arrested. He attempted to convince the Cops to let him go, but they didn't believe that he was Hitler, and he was sent to a Psych Ward.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Vidya games
Category:I CAN HAZ TRANSLATION?
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Hitman 47s shadow!

Hitman, a game to enjoy and take your anger out on.  When I had a bad day, I'd play Hitman:  Blood Money.  One day, after school, my best friend was moving away.  He was borrowing my Hitman:  Blood Money, but he took the game with him.
One day, 2 years later, I get a package in the mail.  It said, "Please take it back, I don't want to play it anymore.  I forgot about it and then I remembered it was your game.  Please just keep it."  It was from my best friend.  I had no idea what made him sound like he was freaked out about.  There it was.  My old Hitman:  Blood Money.  So many memories.  When I opened it, it was very bad condition, but enough to play the game.
Once I poppoed it in I heard a woman from the TV screaming, "Get off me!  Don't kill me, please!  I only tried to he..."  I heard a gunshot.  47's Silverballer came up.  You know, his personal favorite.  47 was on the screen, saying, "My target is everyone!  Kill all!"  Then the TV showed what I assumed was the woman crying for help, dead.  Not just dead, but half eaten, limbs were broken, her face was contorted and filled with terror.  47, with his mouth covered in blood and clothing shreds, says, "Oh, Diana, I never knew you were so...  tasty."  At that point, I puked in my mouth a little bit, as it was just so unfitting. Even for a bloody game, it never had this much blood, and 47 wouldn't eat people! 
The agent says, "Oh, yes.  One by one they fall.  Why are humans so delicious?"  I was so freaked out about it.  Then he added, pointing to me, "I wonder how you taste?"  The TV brings up an image showing bodies of the dead.  I counted 15 dead.  One was missing his limbs, one was missing most of his torso.  One of them only had a head left!  They were all dead, but they were chanting my name, saying, "Where were you?  2 years, you left us!  2 years!"  At that point, I successfully turned off my PlayStation 2.
I wanted to break the game in half, but a game where it had this?!  The scream, 47 portrayed as a cannibal, and the chanting dead.  Despite it's condition, this is too cool to be thrown out.  To this very day, I still have that Hitman:  Blood Money.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Pointless Violence
Hl2

this is a news report in new york times. it really happend
you have to belive us
==section one==
so one day i was just walking through the city with kyle when i saw a free steam wallet card on the floor
kyle said "yo mang wats steam?"
i said "youve got to be kidding me! when will you grow up and stop playing kid games like sonic and pong and starfox."
we both laughed it off then i hit him in the jaw and picked up the 20 dollar card
i went home later and purchases hl2 and it said updating. it updated a very long time so i went to bed. my dream was a one where gordon was running from a big gman. gman had a long tounge and picked freeman up and ate him then there as a large explosion in the background. i woke up with my bed wet (from persparation,i wasnt scared of that dream one bit) the next day i got a call on my phone, it was from kyle. he said not to play the game
"screw you kyle. you are trying to scare me again" i said. he hung up....
i opend steam and the game was finished loading. i turned the video game on and the startup valve head logo looked alot creepier the background was a sickening puke yellow and the head fully turned around. it had no eyes and a mouth with a gaping jaw i could practically see his cracked skull. i said "huh must be a part of the steampipe update. boy i was wrong when it got to the main menu it said spook life 2.
by that time i was really scared i started the game. and insteam of trainstation it started me in our benafactors i beat the first part and it took me to this level with a dark room with zombies. i died. then it stared up again and it put me in the trainstation part again gman was a skeleton and when he said ashes all npcs had blood red eyes. i was very curious to see if there were any mods in the game there werent but there was a map (link at bottom)
i got up to canals and then i saw the big gman in the skybox. his large mouth opend and a skeleton jumped out and killed me. the game stopped responding and i had to reinstall it.
i wont play hl2 again and i dont think anyone should have to go through this anymore... download the zombie map i died at at the section below :3
==the download==
http://www.mediafire.com/?bvjx9hv0jp1sd4t
Category:Trollpasta
Category:English Class Failure
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:Dreams
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Holder Of Lies

In any city, any country, go to the nearest End Portal. Slay the Ender Dragon and fuck the Endermen (not Endergirls,
being straight is a moral sin in their world). DO NOT pick up anything the dragon drops, whether it be the obsidian or XP. Instead, there will be a wet dead tuna hidden behind one of the obsidian pillars. This is where you'll need to be strong. Walk until you find a one that you instantly gain a fetish for. That is where the tuna will be. Choose the wrong one, however, and Michael Jackson will appear and tear off your balls, then beating you to death with them.
After obtaining the tuna, leave The End. You will then step out into a small room. Turn on the light, which has now replaced your dick. Flick the balls to use it. A table will be visible, with Bill Cosby at one end, and a seat at your end. Sit, and wait for a few moments. Bill will make strange sounds and tell you lies to attempt to get you to gtfo, but don't take notice. Instead, sit silently and wait.
He will then sigh and lean forward. Lay the tuna to your left, and do not acknowledge it. The moment you lay your eyes on it Bill will disappear and you'll be trapped in the room because you're a dumb twat who couldn't do something as simple as not looking at a fucking tuna. Ask him, "is the weed safe?". He should nod. If not, you fucked it up and you'll be trapped in his dungeon as a sex slave because you're a dumb twat who couldn't do something as simple as following fucking instructions.
If he does nod, though, proceed with more questions. You will know when he lies. The moment he does, bitchslap him with the tuna. He will like it, but you may only do it once per lie. It may seem like he doesn't learn from it, but he does. After the 666th question, stand up and say "too long didn't read cuck get a real job lol", and he will give you a key to unlock the door.
There are two possibilities now. You will either enter your bedroom, with a million didos in the corner. Or, you will enter a sex dungeon with toys and people beyond your worst nightmares. A hooker will then staple a name tag saying "SUBJECT #009" on your left nipple causing you to scream. You fucked up real bad if that happens.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Rituwel
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Holder of Dumbassery

In any city in any country go to a pubic park. Well actually not any city. I mean you wouldn't want to go to North Korea or Apefrica. Anyways wander around like your drunk until you see a business man. Walk up to the business man and say these exact words; bwagagagagagcokokoooooocoopwdllpwllwump If your even one letter off, run as fast as you can and whatever you do not look behind you, or you will trip and fall. If you however successfully say it the man will say wait here and call someone. At this point wander around the park making weird noises and stare at people with one eye. An ambulance will appear and you must cooperate with the EMTs. They will take you to an instutution. When you get there break away from the EMTs. Run towards the clerk and tell her you must see King Puzzlefuzz when she questions you point to the candle near the phone jack. The EMTs will have found you by now and a security guard will lead you to a padded room. He will put you In a strait jacket and lock the door. The straight jacket is item 69 out of 666 congratulations dumbass you're now stuck in an asylum.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Pre-Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Wall of Text
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Shortpasta
Holder of Fluffy Kittens

In any city, in any country, go to any pet store or zoo you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself "The Holder of Fluffy Kittens". Should a look of child-like glee come over the worker's face, you will then be taken into the building, in a long, well lit, windowed corridor.
All you will hear is the sound of fluffy kittens meowing, growling, and purring endlessly. It is a language that you do not understand, but your very soul will feel unspeakable happiness.
Should the kittens stop making noise at any time, start tiptoeing, and be as quiet as possible; you don't want to interrupt naptime. If you do, you'll have to leave; don't stop for anything, don't go home, don't stay at an inn, just keep moving, sleeping wherever your body drops.
You will know in the morning if you've escaped successfully. Or you can just offer them some milk as compensation. That works too.
Anyway, after you've dealt with that, continue on. Upon reaching the room, all you will see is a gigantic open-air gazebo, with hundreds of cute fluffy kittens huddled in the corners, playing endlessly and cradling something. The kittens will only respond to one question: "What happens when you all grow up?"
They will then stare intently into your eyes and answer your question in horrifying detail. No matter how fluffy the kitten, no matter how cuddly, cute, or playful, all kittens eventually become cats. They will go into excruciating detail of every sofa shredded, every sweater unraveled, every songbird devoured.
Many go mad in that very gazebo; others disappear soon after the encounter, and still others end their lives. But most do the worst thing, and make eye contact with one of those kittens. You, too, will be tempted. Be warned that if you do, your snuggling will be one of cruelty and unrelenting horror.
Your death will be in that room, by that kitten's paws.
That kitten is 0 of 538. They must never grow up. Never.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Rituwel
Category:Memes
Category:Animulz
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Pages with proper attribution
Holder of Swag

In any country, (except South Korea because fuck them) in any city, you can find an old building or mental hospital. When you enter, if the person at the desk is a man, you are safe. If it is a woman, you will die the slowest and most painful death ever by being nagged to death. Ask the man "I want to see the Holder of Swag." If you speak incorrectly or stutter, your liver will explode no matter what, and rats will eat your decaying body as you descend into hell.
If you speak correctly, he will make a face that looks like he just shit himself. Offer him a towel. If he accepts, he will use the towel to strangle you to death. If he refuses, carry on. The man will lead you through a doorway, far down in the corners of the building. He will reach for the door, but don't let him open it. (That's not important to the ritual, but he just shit himself, so you don't want him spreading germs.
Enter through the door, but only after 3.7 seconds, or you will be forced to listen to disco music for eternity. In the hallway, there are several pictures of cute dogs. DO NOT look at this pictures, or the dogs will jump out of the paintings and eat your face. You should hear some whispering. If it stops, you must clap your hands 77 times in 17 seconds. If you do not do EXACTLY that, a giant foot will fall from the sky and step on you.
Continue going, and enter the door at the end of the hallway. Here, you will see the Holder Of Swag, also known as PATRIXXX. As the X's in his name suggests, he loves porn. Give him the 2011 sexiest female swimsuit model, for it is the only one not yet in his collection. PATRIXXX will gladly accept, and get a huge boner.
This boner is object 69 of 420. Never let them come together... for if you do...
A skeleton will pop out.
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:EVIL PATRIXXX
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
Holder of Taco Bell

At 3 AM in the morning, after you've jacked off into a sewer vent using barbecue sauce as a lube and claimed biweekly unemployment benefits, walk into any Taco Bell in Des Moines, Iowa. Make sure that your cashier has red hair and freckles and a penis. Ask him/her if he/she directed A Beautiful Mind. If that person says yes, bark like a dog seventeen times and tell him/her that you like turtles. The employee in question will lead you into the backroom. There, using unexpired salsa as your lube this time, masturbate into the meat hose. The meat hose will be full of semen. Spray this semen meat into the next fifty taco shells. Make sure you lick the taco shells with your tongue, and take a picture with your 80s-style cell phone. When you get home, upload the pic to the Internet and force it into becoming a meme.
In your dreams, you will be visited by the ghost of Andre the Giant. Ask him why the Undertaker lost, and he will fuck you up the ass until you experience rectal tearing. Use lucid dreaming to wipe the leftover salsa lubricant off your dick and onto your shredded asshole. Andre the Giant will animorph into the Taco Bell chihuahua  Properly spell out the word 'chihuahua', and the Taco Bell dog will sympathize, and grant you a Free Meals For Life card. You are now the holder of Taco Bell.
Your penis is object 69 out of 666. Learn how to use it, because you will go sterile in 42 hours.
80s-brick-cell-phone.jpg|frame|Your dad using your phone.
517803650_11_294_220.jpg|frame|You licking the taco shells.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Memes
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Holder of the Beer

In any town In any country go to any bar or tavern. Approach the bartender and ask for a Beer, Any other order will result in INSTANT DEATH... for some reason.
Sit down on the nearest stool and sip your drink. You will notice a unshaven man to your left wearing a football jersey. Do not look at him for more than a moment or you will suffer a fate worse than death.
Continue drinking. If you stop... you will fail the trail. Upon drinking 1 8th of you 8th beer you may turn to face the man.
You are permitted to ask him this one and only question. "Hey Brah do me a solid and hold my drink while I go have a piss".
He will say yes and then begin to speak to you something that resembles English. Go to the bathroom immediately.
If you stay and listen you will fail and will become his prisoner trapped forever.
Once you enter the bathroom you will suddenly find yourself vomiting profusely. Narrowly missing your good Levi's. Once you finish vomiting enter you urinal. DO NOT glance at the mirror as you pass it.
In fact never look in mirrors.
As you finish urinating shake 2 times. No more no less. If you perform a third shake... The demons will deem you 'Playing with yourself' and will drag you to hell. Now wash your hands or "Those pesky demons will GETCHA"
When you return to your stool the man will return your beer.
This is object no.69 of 538.
Category:Memes
Category:Rituwel
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Holder of the Hands

Atleast 100 years ago, but even longer, the Earth was still nuu. And then the Evil Patrixxx created man to be his servants. However, he made a big mistake when he created the Grape Ape, as it swayed all his servants, Man, to worship him instead of Patrixxx. They had an epic battle, but Grape Ape won. In these days, Patrixxx wasn't as powerful. In order to keep Patrixxx at bay, Grape Ape and his bitches created Chicken Nugget. However, it was lost during the crusade of fried chicken and never seen again...
In any city or town, go to your local McDonalds. Ask an employee to see Big G. If he agrees, follow him into a backroom. If he refuses, come back later that night. In the backroom, there is a book. Reading it will put you in a nightmare realm. It's full of extremely detailed fanfic pr0nz. Don't do it, motherfucker! Everyone who has read it without doing the right thing died. You must say "DO NOT WANT" or else you will get it. No one has ever seen the ending, because they usually die in the middle of it. For your safety, i'm not giving it to you. Once you exclaim your feelings of not want, you will appear in what appears to be Heaven. Again, ask the man to see Big G. This time, you will die, die, die, or go through a portal, in a dark room. There is a single lamp, with a desk and two chairs on both sides. A shadowy, large apelike figure will be in the one farthest from you. Sit in the chair infront of him. Ask him for the Chicken Nugget. He will stare at you with his creepy stare. Drink purple stuph off his desk. If you know what's good for you. If you don't, your eyes will melt off your skull. He then will hand you the Chicken Nuget. Don't fuck with it bitch, scary stuff could happen. You will be fucked by scary shadow people with huge fucking eyes. Like I said, don't fuck with it. Also, skeletons will pop out.
This object is 420 out of Yolo.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:EVIL PATRIXXX
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:NSFW
Category:Memes
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Excessive Profanity
Category:Shortpasta
Holder of the Toaster

In any city, in any country, go into any mental institution or halfway house you can get into. Go to the front desk and ask to see the one who calls them-self "The Holder of the Toaster". The lady at the front desk will tell you that you look like a hushpuppy. When this happens, you have failed. The only way to prevent this failure is to take a selfie and spam it all over Facebook. 
Once this is all complete, the lady at the front desk will take you into a dark hallway behind the building. You should not being singing while this happens, otherwise you will need to make a Minecraft server. Here's how to make one:
1. Advertise on tons of websites and ask for money. Make sure to talk bad about the other leading servers too! You will get many nice replies, such as "You suck". People who write this want and need to play your server. RIGHT NOW.
2. You need to code your Minecraft server. Firstly, you will need to open Notepad and type this: "Yo yo yo, my name is bob, I like to eat corn on the cob" and save the file as direct.bat and choose save as All Files.
Once your Minecraft server is done, you should be ready to meet The Holder of the Toaster. This Holder is very special, because he holds toasters.
My family is thousands of miles away from me thanks to selfies.
Once you meet The Holder, you will be given a test. The test says that if anyone who looks like a hushpuppy has their cause of death written within the next 40 seconds of writing the person's name, it will happen.
Sometimes I like to sit in dark corners and make dolphin noises.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Minecrap
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:That just raises more questions!
Category:Overused Running Gag
Category:Im died
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Shortpasta
Hollow Man

The Hollow Man, he is utterly unknown because all who see him disappear. Other times he is invisible. Most confuse him with the Slender Man, but unlike little ol' Slendy, he isn't as tall, and he has large, glowing eyes that when you stare into them, it's almost like the static of an old TV.
There have been very few who have seen him and lived to tell the tale. They become paranoid, thinking that he will appear again, to take them away like they should have been. That paranoia leads most, if not all, surviving victims to suicide within three days.
The Hollow Man appears to those he chooses. It starts when he whispers to you, a sweet, lulling voice, leading you to the sweetest dreams. He tells you his wish, and why he chose you; He only wants to play. After the whispering, the Hollow Man stalks his "play mate", at first at a distance, but he gets closer, and closer, each time.
Running seems like the only option, you are safest in the light, any light. He lives in the dark. If you shine a light on him, don't look, the sight will drive you to insanity. Don't get close either, light or no light, they say he will grab you, pull you into the dark, where you will be floating in an endless void for what seems like eternity.
The Hollow Man can't be killed, he can only be held at bay. Some say he is just like an animal, and he can be tamed. No one knows if that assumption is true or not, because most don't know the Hollow Man, period. But there is a legend of a little girl who sees him, sees him every day, and at night. She goes outside with the Hollow Man and they play together, sometimes hide and seek, some times tag. But how is this, if most people disappear when ever they get close, or go insane whenever they see him? No one truly knows, that's why, because no one knows the Hollow Man.
They say the Hollow Man doesn't just suck you in, he eats your soul. Other say he takes you to the little girl, and there she tortures you, cutting you apart piece by piece, slowly, savoring every moment. But who knows. No one. There are possibilities, however, that don 't float on the bad side of things. It's possible that the Hollow Man takes you to a better place. Invisible to everyone except those who are chosen, a safe place, free from all harm. That's what he whispers in your ear though, so it can't be trusted.
How do I know so much about the Hollow Man? Because he chose me. I'm sitting in a dark room, only lit up by my laptop screen. I didn't do this by choice, it's a power outage. The light keeps the Hollow Man away, but the laptop is dying. He is whispering to me, grabbing at my sanity, pulling me to the darkness. No one knows what happens when he takes someone. Whether I like it or not, I'm going to find out. I have only a few minutes left, and the Hollow Man is behind me, I feel him there, he knows that I can sense him too. He's waiting, waiting for the laptop to die...waiting for his new play mate. Goodbye world.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Beings
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit