Cars 4

I like the movie Cars. It is fun to watch. It has sequels such as Cars 2 and Cars 3 and a toon series called Mater's tall tales. It also has a spinoff movie titled Planes. I like the cars series. But there is a lost Cars 4 film.
So one day i was walking home from school and i saw a disc titled Cars 4: lost cars film. I wanted to watch it. So i ejected my LittleBigPlanet disc and put the DVD in my PS3. The movie opened with heavy breathing. "Focus. Speed. I am speed. One winner, 42 losers, I ate losers for Breakfest. Breakfest? I should've have- No no stay focus, Speed. I'm faster than fast, quicker than quick, I am lightning!" It then showed the protagonist of the soon to be franchise finishing up snorting something white and powdery. What the? How. the. heck. They showed a character snorting cocaine? 
It then cut to Lightning McQueen, white powder still on his face, racing with other formula cars. McQueen was designed a bit different in this compared to the final product to be released just 4 and a half short years later. His shape was more boxy and his racing number was 57 instead of 95. (Because his umber was originally 57 for the year 1957.) He was quickly gaining the first place spot when the antagonist, Chick Hicks came up behind him. He also looked different. He looks like a future car shape of tomorrow and had a Ugandan Knuckles face with a hitler mustache I think...
He came up behind McQueen and pushed him, sending McQueen spinning out of control and tumbling down the track, highly realistic car parts flying everywhere, then getting run over by every single racecar on the track. Randy Newman, who composed Cars Stopped as the dust settled, the scene now completely silent as the camera slowly pans in on McQueen's mangled body. He's still alive, but barely. He's moving slowly, shakily, trying to get up. Oddly, no one's coming to his aid at all. Just letting McQueen sit in his crashed state, bleeding bloody blood everywhere. Now I'm pretty sure cars cannot bleed. However, they can't talk or move on their own or have any sentient capabilities either so who am I to judge?
Anyways, After a cut to black, it cuts to McQueen in a hospital, surrounded by the cars from Radiator Springs. Sally, Mater, Doc Hudson, Luigi, Guido, Ramone, Flo, Red, Fillmore, Sarge, Sheriff, Mack, and Lizzie were all at McQueen's bedside. He was dying from his previous injuries. His whole body was completely bent and dented, his spoiler was dangling off his body, one of his eyes was gouged out, and he had bitten his tongue in half during the crash. The animation was Really great at the opening, now the animation is Hands down the C4D side at the Hospital scene OMG It looked like it was animated by someone who had just learned how to use Cinema 4D. It was a rough idea for Pixar to do this. The animation is always great at every Pixar film, so who am I the judge? The shading, lighting, texturing and everything else was Great however. I know the quality is getting more Chubbly than the actual Cars Movie. "Well, looks like this is the end!" McQueen stated with a small, half-hearted chuckle. No one else spoke a word. Just watched as McQueen's life slowly started to fade away. "You know something, if everything happened for a reason, and everyone has a purpose for living, then why am I sitting here taking my last breaths at my young, young age? If you think about it, I don't have any real purpose in this world, and what happened is a result of God weeding out the bad apples. So you see, God hasn't abandoned us, but has certain ones he hates. Why not? I don't hold the answer to that question, nor does anyone else on this beautiful earth..." His human-like features begin to fade, and turn into real-life car features that you and I call normal. One by one as McQueen spoke, features began to transform or fade completely away. "Enjoy your time on earth everybody, for it might not last as long as you may think..."
It cut to Sally wearing a monocle and wooden teeth, holding a Meme, listening to what McQueen had to say. A piece of paper with a heart with a crack down the middle appeared on McQueen's face as he continued. He began to speak in tongues, what sounded to be Yiddish mixed with a hint of German. Subtitle slides that were used in silent films appeared translating what he was speaking. It said "Before I breathe my last breath, I want you all to also know I have seen Heaven, and I have seen Hell, and I know which one I'm going to!" When the slide was done showing, it cut to McQueen again, having a piece of glass for his eyes like a real life car, and a grill instead of a mouth. He was still speaking, but it was muffled. He was also holding a pinecone with googly eyes, a bowtie and a top hat, which transformed into the Buddha Pictures statue, You know, the Dead meat ranked logo that was used in the Indian films, you know the one! Another slide appeared showing the words "Goodbye everyone, I am about to enter a new world of unending suffering and pain, much like in this realm, only many times worse..." It then cut to McQueen again, but as a picture of a real life version of McQueen pasted onto the hospital bed, much in the style of something from Home Alone, who was by FOX. Disney Didn't buy FOX Until 2017! He had a Star of David etched onto the driver's side door and was what I think would be dead. Then Mater Said "I missed Lightning... *Sobs*" Then doc Hudson, or as I would like to call it "The fabulous Hudson Hornet!" Hugs mater and said, "Don't worry mater, I got you..." It was the saddest, most heart-wrenching moment I had ever heard in my 39 years of life!
It then faded to McQueen in Hell, perfectly normal and intact. What followed was Satan himself and Lightning McQueen competing in a rap battle. Weird since I thought Satan could just play a mean fiddle, I guess he got with the times. Satan was the first to go. "Yo, yo, I'm Satan and I wish you luck, hope your rhymes don't suck. McQueen retorted with a rhyme of his own. "You can keep up with the beat, can rhyme in time, but your rhymes are more sour than a lime!" What the heck is this? This is some low quality, stoopid rapping. If this was Pixar's idea for two gangstas spitting straight fire bars at each other, then they also probably think the earth is round. Pfft, idiots.
Satan responded to McQueen's Dumb rhyme with another damn rhyme. "My words are poetry, yours are booed, my rhymes are 5-star quality, yours are like fast food!" The only thing about this scene that's worse than the rapping, is the fact that several dead celebrities are in the background, cheering after each line is dropped, including Tupac and Biggie Smalls. McQueen responded with, surprise surprise, another dumb crappy rhyme! "Shut up, my lyrics are fire, yours aren't even worthy to lick the dog poop off my tires!" The cheering from the onlookers was so loud after that last rhyme that my TV speakers started crackling. They cheered and cheered some more, more onlookers joining in on the cheering, more and more start cheering until nothing can be heard except white noise. Satan and McQueen's ears are now bleeding, but I couldn't tell if it was from the intense amount of cheering, or just their poor rapping, or maybe it was the freaking worst beat ever coming from an old 90s boombox that was positioned between the two contestants.
As I reached for the volume button on my television since the white noise was too loud, McQueen and Satan both turned and looked at the camera, out the television, at me, into my soul. They were crying tears of incredibly realistic blood and had razors for teeth. "Turn down that volume and I'll turn up at your house, Sebastian!" McQueen said in a menacing, demonic tone. How the heck did this disc know my name? I restrained myself from turning down the volume as the disc faded to black, then ended. I sat there for what seemed like 2 days, replaying everything I had seen in my head over and over again, without even getting up to go to the bathroom.
So what i did was i took the disc out of my PS3 and smashed it into bits. So if you ever see a disc titled Cars 4, DO NOT WATCH IT!!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Demins and Debbils
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:SMOKE WEED ERRYDAY
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Featured Pastas