nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Telephone

My girlfriend arrived at my house at 9:37 at night, I think, tears streaming down her face, and sobbing. I let her in and sat her down on the sofa, confused as to what was going on with her. It didn't seem as though she was going to stop soon, so I left her momentarily to get her some orange juice. She loved oranges. I came back and gave her some, and she drank it, then cuddling up next to me speechless for about half an hour or so. When she finally did start speaking, it sounded as though she had been shouting not too long ago.
"I'm sorry, it's just that..." She trailed off.
"What happened?" I asked, noticing bruises on her arms.
"My mom's blaming me for something that happened in the family," she continued.
"Would you mind telling me what happened in your family?" I curiously asked her.
"Sorry, but it's just a little too personal to talk about right now," she responded, nearing me.
She kissed me, and again, and soon we were all over each other. I decided to get up and take this hot action to my bedroom. So we went, and after about what I thought was five or so minutes, I'm not really sure, my cell phone rang. I looked at the clock and I noticed the time. It was 11:03 now, and I was wondering two things. One, why did someone have to call me NOW? And two, who the hell was calling at this hour? Growling a little, I told her I had to see who it was. Answering the phone, I heard a gruff voice.
"You better not lay your hands on my daughter, you dirty son of a-" The voice spoke, as I pulled the phone away from my ear. Contemplating whether or not I should answer it, I decided I should.
"Excuse me, but uh... who is this?" I asked.
"Her father." He responded.
"Well then, would you like to speak to her?"
"Yes." He snarled.
I took the phone away from my ear, and told her, "It's your dad, he wants to talk to you."
"Wait, that's what I was going to tell you about. He passed away, and my mom thought it was my fault, so she beat me," She told me, showing me her bruises.
"Then, who is..." I began to ask, then hearing the voice from the phone.
"They call me Phone. I'd like my daughter back." He said, and then he hung up.
After my girlfriend left the room, freaked out and wanting to go home, I never saw her again, to my knowledge. My house caught on fire the next day. When I returned home, I was horrified at what I saw, the charred remnants of what used to be my home. I searched through the remains, and the only doors left intact were the bathroom door, missing most of the bathroom, and a closet door, singed, but intact. I opened the door to see what I would find. You know what happened next? A human skeleton, the size of my girlfriend's fell out, hitting the ground with a clatter. I looked back inside and saw a word, carved with what was probably a knife, into the back of the closet. Just one word.
"PHONE"
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:WHO WAS PHONE?
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Teletubbies Purgatory Theory

I'm a crazy drunken Gaelic man who went a wee crazy after I found out about the Teletubbies Purgatory Theory. I was just a wee lad when I grew up watchin the Teletubbies on the telly. I always loved watching it as a lad and without it I would never have become the man I am today.
Ye know I once noticed that the house where the Teletubbies live looks just fekin like the old Celtic burial mound Bryn Celli Ddu. Guess who created the Teletubbies: that right, it was them damn Brits! That was how I found out that the Teletubbies were actually the ghosts of the Anglo-Saxon warriors who were brutally murdered by some strange magical sky demon and sent to Purgatory for killing a bunch of young Celtic children. These Celtic children appear as ghosts, fekin ghosts I shit ye not, on the televisions on the Teletubbies' stomachs. The reason the Teletubbies were sent to Purgatory lookin like those creepy fekin monstrosities is because the narrator (God) wanted to punish them by making them into some ugly motherfuckers and every time those Celtic children appear they're only happy because every time they appear the Teletubbies endure unbearable pain from the ghost children tearin up their fekin insides to appear in the ye old televisions and so the holy narrator narrates the painful afterlife of the fekin Teletubbies until the end of time for their crimes in ye old Brittania.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:THERY
Category:TELAVISHUN
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:Shortpasta
Teletubby Ritual

To perform a the ritual to summon one of the demonic Tubbies, multiple steps are required. The steps are: 
*Grab a object of inspiration, such as a drawing, figure, photo etc 
*Use ink to draw a pentagram on the floor
*Eat salt for protection 
*LOCK YOUR DOORS
*Put the picture in the middle of the pentagram 
Should all these steps be completed, you will here a metallic screech as the letter appears infront of you, the letter will fe you what time your personalized tubby will arrive and set of unique rules which are selected from a rule pool by whoever is behind the tubby attacks. The tubby the picture shows was named Vim and had the following rules: 
*Stay out of the basement
*Look me in the eyes (your allowed to blink)
*Always laugh at my jokes 
*Never run in my glare 
The summoner of Vim disappeared into the night as a message on the wall said "VIM HAS FAILED TO CATCH THERE TARGETS". The man was later found eating a dog in the woods and is currently residing in hospital by his injuries related to the tubby.
==Aftermath==
The ritual was banned in Germany, Russia etc which makes sense, since it killed 5 people so far, and only one tubby has been killed, and if you try to do it even if you fail, you will be fined.
==EXTRA NOTES==
*Never draw your tubby with a weapon as it guarantees it had a weapon
*If you draw multiple references of your tubby label them as they same tubby as it will stop the chance of multiple tubbies appearing. 
*Never unless stated in the rules approach a tubby.
Follows these steps and you might survive. 
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Rituwel
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Crappy ms paint drawings
Teletubby Ritual 2.0

The teletubby Ritual is now new and improved. 
__NOTOC__
==You will need==
•Salt to consume 
•Sugar to cast upon the the.tubby. 
•Ink of elder 
•Paper 
•Feather quill.(specifically crow)
== How to summon ==
•To summon a elder tubby, you must have completed a normal version of the tubby ritual. See Teletubby Ritual for more info.
•Draw a sigil using a feather quill plucked from a live crow. 
•The symbol you draw will give birth to a elder tubby. 
•Consume.your salt or the elder tubby as soon as it emerges from.the sigil will instantly drag you to hell. 
•Survive 
== How to survive ==
Each elder tubby has its own set of abilities and rules. For today we will look at the most famous elder tubby, who's sigil is popularly used in the ritual, Satanis. 
== The rules of Satanis ==
•Satanis can levitate objects using his antenna powers 
•Never look.into his mouth as your soul will be drained into the nine hell's and be damned. 
•Avoid the backdoor, as he has stationed two teletubbies with clubs there. 
== The aftermath ==
if you survive, you will be granted a free passage to heaven no matter what sins you do.forever.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Rituwel
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Demins and Debbils
Category:Shortpasta
Television

It is said if you tune in to a locked frequency Australian Numbers station at 11:30, a sequence of numbers will be read out by a baritone, expressionless American voice. The numbers will represent a binary code. When the man finishes speaking, something will happen.
The black screen will ultimately disappear and you will see your future through your own eyes in a 5 minute sequence. In the last 2 minutes, the picture will get distorted. Static will overpower what was once clean audio.
As shapes bend out of place you will get unsettled. But the screen and sound will revert to black and there is no audio to be heard. You are now free to turn off your television.
Turning it off mid video will make anxiety get the better of you. But the vision will never come back. You crave to know your future. It will overpower you. And you will spend the rest of your life in anxiety, wondering what will happen next.
The decoded message reads: I see you have seen your future. Are you not happy with what is to come? If not, why don't you end it now and hope you get a better one in the afterlife that will await all of you. If you are satisfied with your future, always know that I am the harbinger of that future. Your knowledge of what is to come is only supported by the fact that I told you. I guess I didn't show you the last 5 minutes of your future. I leave messages for you, clues all throughout your life. You will become my slave. You are trapped either way. So. Will you end it now?
How do I know all this? I will show you when you join me in the world of slavery. It is called 'Humanity'. It disgusts me to the very core.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:TELAVISHUN
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Telivision theory

Have you ever wondered how TV's work
You see Magical faries and pixies come and turn these people into mini peoples and then make them do whatever they want. AND IF ANYONE SAYS OTHERWISE THEY ARE AUTOMATICALLY WRONG WHY CAUSE I SAY THEY ARE, IT ALSO WORKS BEY FUCKING THE HOLES IN THE TV AND SHITING IN YOUR PANTS
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:TELAVISHUN
Category:THERY
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Temple Run Creepypasta

You know that one app Temple Run, right? The one where you're an adventurer running through a jungle-like obstacle course, running away from three or four monkeys with skulls, getting faster while you progress.
Well today is a great day. I finally went to the Apple store to get my iPod Touch fixed from a battery malfunction. I was really excited; once I got home I plugged in my iPod to the computer and booted up iTunes. After syncing my music I went straight to the App Store to download Temple Run. It downloaded pretty fast, no big deal. I pressed on the little tiki head to start it up.
It took a while to even bring up the loading screen. It was just on a black screen for a good 10 seconds and then came up the Imangi Studios logo. This is weird, I thought to myself. It probably took some time since I just got it, right? The exit (or entrance) of the temple showed up, but what was weird was the options to choose from. Everything seemed to look a bit more...dull in color. Instead of the play, objectives, stats, store, options, and more games options it just had "Run" as an option. I was a bit confused on what was going on, but I pressed it anyways.
The original cut-scene with the character running out of the temple with the monkeys didn't show up; instead it was just my character running. He was running pretty fast for it to be the start of the level. It seemed as if he was running as if you were passing the 3,000 meter mark. Still a little confused why it is acting up like this but I went along with it. With every 250 meters it seemed to get slower and slower. At around 2,000 meters my character fainted! The skull monkeys came running from behind and started attacking him! The camera zoomed in showing the monkeys tearing off skin! It seemed too real, I was shocked! They clawed his stomach, pulled out his entrails, and started devouring it. There was a lot of gore that I could not imagine! The graphics seemed way too real to be put in such a game! After they have ripped out almost every organ and gobbled it up they looked at the screen.
They just stared at the screen. Those wretched skull masks they wore...ugh I couldn't stand it. Parts of the masks have fallen when they were ravaging the poor guy. The music sounded distorted. One of them finally uttered some words. "No one can run away from fate. You better start." After that my iPod crashed and turned itself off. I couldn't turn it on and my computer couldn't recognize it. I tried calling Apple to see what was wrong with it, but they were no help. They told me that the serial code for my iPod did not exist in their database.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Pointless Violence
Ten years

The phone rings. You pick it up, and you hear this:
It's been 10 years.
10 years of terror. 10 years of Adobe being a scummy bastard again. 10 years of stupid stories.
And it all comes to an end. With one more nail to the coffin...
Now, this is a story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down!
And I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there,
I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called Bel-Air!
I whistled for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said, "Fresh" and it had dice in the mirror.
If anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought "Nah, forget it, yo, holmes to Bel Air!"
I pulled up to the house about seven or eight, and I yelled to the cabbie, "Yo holmes, smell ya later!"
I looked at my kingdom, I was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air.
*the phone hangs up*
And then you ask,
BUT WHO WAS PHONE?!??!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air
Category:WHO WAS PHONE?
Category:Shortpasta
Tender Nipples

"Once there was a man who had tender nipples."
"His nipples were so tender that when you look at the definition of tender, his nipples would be on the whole page."
"People who knew about his tender nipples would walk up to him and say "mmmm tender nipples, me likey" then they would just stop and carry on their day."
"Then one day, with his ass lasers, Johnson came to touch his his tender nipples"
"Johnson farted, it meant that his ass lasers were pleased"
"Dick salts came with his wife, Vagina Salt, and they spreaded dick and vagina salt all over his tender nipples."
"Then everyone wanted to get into the action"
"Everyone was pleased with the result."
"Mmmm tender nipples"
"T-Rex's came out from their graves to see and feel the tender nipples. As a result, they were pissed off because they have very tiny hands and they could not feel the nipples."
"So they started destroying shit."
"Johnson and Dick Salts tried to save the world, but because of those nice and tendery tender nipples, they were so exhausted and they just felt lazy to do shit."
"Tender Nipples wasn't tired at all"
"So he used his magic nipple powers and went inside the T-Rex's and their needs."
"Soon the T-rex's went back to their graves, while groaning "Mmmm Tender Nipples".
"Everyone had their action and they went to bed. As they went to bed they were groaning "Mmmm Tender Nipples"
Created on the Creepypasta Wiki chat
Category:Trollpasta
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Inside Jokes
Category:Shortpasta
Tentacle Hentai Theory

"it's coming out your mouth."
Not really. You can get all the way to the end of the ascending colon (filling up the entire large intestines) but then you encounter the first major one-way valve of the digestive track. Well technically it's the last valve, but since we're traveling backward.. You get the idea.
But that's assuming you're using a dildo. In the hentai you're referring to it's usually not a dildo, but a living prehensile tentacle that can feel it's way through. In theory if the tentacle was able to constrict to about 1cm in diameter it could ease it's way past the ileocaecal valve (end of small intestines), snake through the 7m of small intestines, ease it's way past the pyloric valve (bottom of stomach), into the stomach, past the cardioesophageal sphincter (top of stomach), and finally up and out through the esophagus all without doing any damage. Unfortunately for the sex fantasy it's going to turn into torture once it hits the small intestines as all that stimulation is likely going to trigger a diarrhea response and cause horrible cramps.
Then again... The existence of such a tentacle creature and the way it's victims are often depicted as enjoying the experience implies that it secretes substances to counteract this effect, most likely a mixture of mild muscle relaxants and some kind of euphoria inducing drug. Makes quite a lot of sense, because the obvious reason such a creature would evolve to do any of this at all is to feed on the contents of the digestive track (or lay eggs in the case of the edgier hentai). Either way having a means of making it's prey less combative would be a huge evolutionary advantage for it.
So yea... Not sure how I feel about spending half an hour coming up with a scientific breakdown of hentai tentacle monsters, but what's done is done. Enjoy.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Memes
Category:Shortpasta
Tentakle's Skareh Experience

So one night I was in that there forest with a flashlight that had an unreliable battery. I had no fucking clue how I got there, but it was night, I was lonely and scared. So, instead of leaving, I decided to look around.
Three or four minutes later, I found eight pieces of paper with crappy, kindergarten-level drawings of some tall stickfigure.
Suddenly, I saw and heard static, as if my eyes were like fucking televisions or something. Did that mean I'm some fucking teletubby? I hope not... So I turned around for some reason and saw that there Slender Man, and I was like, "FUCK OFF, SLENDER MAN! I HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO JAM ONE OF THESE INDIAN BIRDS IN YOU BRAIN!"
Slender Man looked all fucking scared. "You can't do that!"
"Yes I can... I'm slendererer than you..."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"You're twenty-five years old..."
"What?"
"You're twenty-five years old..." Then the next fucking thing I knew, Slender Man was unleashing some fucking serious Japanese porn on me.
Then, I woke up in the fucking forest and it was day time. Fuck. I hate the sun. So, I stood up and looked at one of those papers to see if it could make sense of what happened.
It read, DON'T LOOK, OR IT TENTACLE-FUCKS YOU.
"Well, that makes sense..." I said to myself.
Slender Man started hugging me from behind.
"FUCK OFF, SLENDER MAN!"
He ran away.
Then, I walked up to an owl sitting on a tree branch and asked him, "Yo, owl. How many licks does it take to get to the center of this lollipop." I gave him the lollipop.
"Let's see. One, two," he said, licking it. Then he bit the shit out of it. "Three..."
"Owl, have you ever seen the first episode of the third season of The Walking Dead?"
"Yes, why?"
"Daryl, get over here!"
Then Daryl from The Walking Dead came up and shot the owl dead.
"Thanks," I said, giving him twenty dollars.
Slender Man started walking over. "Gimme twenty dollars. Gimme twenty dollars. No wifin' in the club," he sang.
"FUCK OFF, SLENDER MAN!"
Slender Man ran away again.
Later, I found my way home. I ate some rice cakes, took a shower and went to bed.
Then a hyper-realistic skeleton popped out.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:PROOF DAT SLENDURMAN EXUSTS
Category:Excessive Profanity
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:DIALOGUE!
Terminator Morning Ritual

I have a morning ritual that I need to share. I call it 'the terminator'. First I crouch down in the shower in the classic 'naked terminator traveling through time' pose. With my eyes closed I crouch there for a minute, visualizing either Arnold or the guy from the second movie (not the chick in the third one because that one sucked) and I start to hum the terminator theme. Then I slowly rise to a standing position and open my eyes. It helps me to proceed through my day as an emotionless, cyborg badass. The only problem is if the shower curtain sticks to my terminator leg. It ruins the fantasy.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Rituwel
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Terraria - Destroyer Has Awoken

Hello, my name is Samuel. When I got Terraria, I was so excited to start playing. When I began, I did the basic things; chop some trees, make a workbench, build a shelter and a sword.
Playing singleplayer was a terrible idea.
As soon as night fell, a message appeared saying that The Destroyer had awoken. I thought it was a rare enemy. Little did I know how rare it was, it went through the walls, wearing full flaming armor and it instantly killed me. It wielded a sword that looked like it had hieroglyphics written on the blade, and I thought it looked pretty cool, so I went on multiplayer and "borrowed" a friends armor and night's edge to kill "The Destroyer".
I managed to kill it, but the strange thing was, it didn't say it was defeated. I just thought it was a glitch and kept on playing with my new sword. The tooltip said "Destroyer" With the stats of 100% Sword, Hammer, Pickaxe, and Axe Power.
Then I understood.
I only killed the wielder, I had never defeated the destroyer.
I had to throw the ultimate weapon into lava. As soon as I made it into the underworld, I tossed it into a lava pool. Immediately, my character died. When I tried to enter back into the game, I couldn't select the world, I couldn't even select the character. The game just wouldn't let me play. Right now I feel as if I'm being watched. I've been hearing a voice saying the destroyer will never be defeated.
Samuel was found dead with a sword in his hand. The sword matches his description of the in-game "Destroyer".
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Beings
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Terraria - Destroyer Has Awoken (Vandalized Version)

Hello, my name is Assface. When I got Terraria, I was so excited to start playing. When I began, I did the basic things; chop some trees, make a workbench, build a shelter and a penis.
Playing Terraria was a terrible idea.
As soon as night fell, a message appeared saying that The Destroyer had awoken. I thought it was a rare enemy. Little did I know how rare it was, it went through the walls, wearing full flaming armor and it instantly killed me. It wielded a sword that looked like it had hieroglyphics written on the blade, and I thought it looked pretty cool, so I went on multiplayer and "borrowed" a friends armor and night's edge to kill "The Destroyer".
I managed to annihilate it, but the strange thing was, it didn't say it was defeated. I just thought it was a glitch and kept on playing with my new sword. The tooltip said "Goblin with erect penis" With the stats of 99.9% Sword, Hammer, Pickaxe, and Axe Power.
Then I fucked a pig.
I only killed the wielder, I had never defeated the destroyer.
I had to throw the ultimate weapon into lava. As soon as I made it into the underworld, I tossed it into a lava pool. Immediately, my character died. When I tried to enter back into the game, I couldn't select the world, I couldn't even select the character. The game just wouldn't let me play. Right now I feel as if I'm being watched. I've been hearing a voice saying the destroyer will never be defeated.
Samuel was found dead with a dildo in his hand. The sword matches his description of the in-game "Dick".
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Beings
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta