Kitler

Despite the Cats That Look Like Hitler craze sweeping the interwebs these days there is no doubt the Kitler master race exists.
Kitler hates you and Mews	Kitler hates you and Mews
 	
The Holy Kitler 	The Holy Kitler
Species 	Kittens
Classification 	The only Cats that look like Nixon Hitler
Position 	Führer of Germany and conqueror of France.
Motive 	To kill all Mews
Weapon 	Their meowing
Super Powers 	Cutiness
Born 	20th April, 1889.
Death Date 	30th April, 1945.
Adorable little Cats aside, it is a proven fact that Kitler is out to get you.
== Do I have a Kitler? ==
You know your cat is a Kitler when it does 2 or more of the following things.
* It Hates Americats and Brits
*Killer cats killin all humans, watch the hell out yo, it be ridiculous* It isn't home a lot
* It has small moustache
* It looks like it is Emo, which it probably is
* It once ALWAYS TRIED TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD
* It pisses on your sheets and lips when you're asleep
* It falls asleep on your face so often that it seems as if it is doing it on purpose, which it is!
* It signs a tweety with Pussolini
* Forces you to eat it's fecal matter (maybe urine).
* It likes little kits.
* Eats your food/ urinates on your food very often.
*has left to join the cazi/nazi.
==So you have a Kitler==
Don't fear, here some rules to help take care of your kitler.
*Don't let it get fat. It will hate you more if it is fat.
*Don't try to cuddle with it. It will hate you more, and you'll come out of it severely injured.
*Don't let it near the news or newspaper. It's better that you don't know why.
*Don't smile when you see it, they hate smil-smile, smile at it, anything to get you killed.
*Don't talk about Russia with him , he might do and he would later commit suicide.
*Don't get a dog, that's the last thing you want. Especially if you wish the dog to stay alive.
*Don't let it go outside. It may never come back.
*Don't attempt to huff a Kitler! This will be disastrous for all involved.
*Don't shave it or try to dye it's hair/'tash unless you want to look like a scratching post.
*Don't let it near any Mews. Actually, scratch that one. This is usually entertaining.
*If you wish to keep your kitler alive, keep it away from the Non-Huffable Kitten at all costs!
*Pretend to enjoy cleaning out its litterbox. This will amuse it.
*If you wish to kill a Kitler, let it live for a while or get like 10 catdiers to painfully and amusingly kill it.
*Give it your food, It will like watching you eat their food. Cat food is actually tasty
*Don't get another kitten if you want it alive. Kitlers only like the orange ones and may use it for Kitten Huffing or a very useful catdier or very rarely, friend.
==Legacy==
Kitler is internationally renowned for being a murderer of innocent Mews during WWII (Wild Warping #2). Many infamous concentration camps were established under his reign, including "Meowshwitz", where Mews were killed mercilessly. Popular methods of murder were:
- Attaching Kitler's mouth to a pipe which eventually led to hermetically sealed room, where awaited a voluminous amount of Mews; one whiff of Kitler's breath could kill all.
- Stabbation with a fang of one of his minions. These fangs are diamond hard and, again, stink like shit.
- Shooting. Nothing special about this.
<Youtube>8Caa-QEY-FA</youtube>
Hitler phones Kitler while the last is drunk.
==The future of Kitlerdom==
Currently, all Kitlers are hatching a world-wide plot to resurrect the Nazi party and take over the world. If you see your kitler acting suspiciously, TURN THEM IN, and win a free t-shirt!
Notably strange activity includes:
Disapearing,
tendency to sleep while standing up,
lack of blinking and
ordering yellow-cake uranium on teh interwebz
== See Also ==
*enemy
*Darth Hitler
*Cats with guns
==External links==
*CatsThatLookLikeHitler.com
*Maus
es:Kitler
pt:Gatolfinho
Category:Kittens
category:cats
Category:Adolf Hitler
Category:Nasty Right Wing Bastards
Category:Nazis