Kinkshaming

Kinkshaming is the practice of passing a negative opinion on someone's favoured kink. 
It can occur in discussions about fanworks and has been the subject of much meta and wank. 
Many kink memes and other prompt communities include provisions not to kink-shame in their rules. Although kinkshaming other fen's preferences is generally frowned upon in fandom, there is still discussion as to what constitutes kinkshaming and when, if ever, it is appropriate or even necessary. 
In order to avoid kinkshaming, fen are often encouraged to adopt a Your Kink Is Not My Kink or Don't Like, Don't Read attitude. The appropriate use of tags and warnings by authors is also encouraged. 
Kinkshaming is also sometimes found in fanworks as a kink itself: in that case, characters shame or humiliate others for having a certain kink. 
==What Is Kinkshaming?==
Kinkshaming has a relatively wide and sometimes controversial definition, which is why there is a lot of meta about what is, and isn't, kinkshaming. 
Kinkshaming seems to range from offhand, backhanded compliments to explicit moral judgements about how "disgusting" certain kinks are, which kinks should be allowed in certain spaces (or ever), and how wrong/evil people who like certain kinks/tropes/setups must be. 
For example:
* From the Sherlock BBC Prompting Meme LJ community:
Discussions of kinkshaming sometimes contend that some of the things people enjoy to creat/consume fanworks about are not "real" kinks, implying that they can or even should be denounced. This applies particularly to incest (causing much discussion in fandoms such as wincest, waycest etc.), non-con (often linked to rape apology and rape fantasies), underage (sometimes linked to accusation of paedophilia, child abuse apology) etc. 
* “OMG, Stop Kink Shaming Me!” by Mockery, posted to Tumblr blog hidashi-is-disgusting in Sept 2015 (accessed May 5, 2016). 
Other forms of kinkshaming can include calling a story shockfic even when it was not created as one (see: Milk). 
===Kinkshaming vs Calling Out===
Some fen have argued that certain discussions/criticism of problematic behaviour (for example misogyny or racism appearing in pairing or trope preferences) was akin to kinkshaming. For example, in her meta piece "Why Isn't Stormpilot Staying Popular?", Franzeska discussed Stormpilot fandom's reactions to prompts involving size kink on a kink meme, writing: 
The difference between the two has been discussed on several occasions:
* on the difference between kink shaming and calling out faily behavior by marina, posted to DW Sep 21, 2014. 
* stitchmediamix's discussion of Franzeska's longer meta essay about criticism of Star Wars: The Force Awakens fandom, Your Vagina is a Bigot; My Vagina is a Saint:
A few days into the discussion, stitchmediamix tweeted:
===Kinkshaming vs Preference===
* Discussion of inadvertent kinkshaming in feedback by thingswithwings:
See discussion in comments. 
* On kinkshaming in Yuletide letters: I like everything but the non-traditional, non-normative, gross and icky stuff! by eruthros, posted to DW Nov 22, 2009: a list of kink-shaming phrasing presented (almost) without comment.
* How to Respectfully Decline Kinky Content in Your Request Letter: A Yuletide (and Other Fest) Guide by implicated2, posted to DW Sept 23, 2014. Excerpt:
See discussion in comments.
===Ironic Uses===
"Don't kinkshame me!" or "kinkshaming is my kink" are sometimes used as ironic commentary/to make fun of the discussions around kinkshaming. 
See for example:
* Twitter search for "Don't kinkshame me"
* "Don't kinkshame me" Tumblr tag
* "Stop kinkshaming me" Tumblr tag
==Shame/Humiliation Kink==
The term "kinkshaming kink" is sometimes used to describe a love for situations where a character is humiliated or shamed for having a certain kink. For example: 
* Anyone/Kankri, Kink Shaming Kink prompt on the Homestuck Kink Meme: 
* Dorian/MLI, kinkshaming as a kink prompt on the Dragon Age: Inquisition Kink Meme
* shaming IS my kink prompt on the Fire Emblem: Three Houses kink meme:
==Meta/Further Reading==
* Kink Shaming - Know Your Meme
==References==