Blood, Blood Mountain

Hello there and welcome to another instalment of Bad Creepypasta, today's story is called "Blood, Blood Mountain." (the sound of a can opening off-screen followed by a pause) There is a drinking game attached to this and you can probably guess it already, so let's begin.
I tend to get bored in my lengthy periods of procrastination and found it harder to justify wasting more time on the same games and videos. I had become increasingly stingy over-time with paying for new content to appease my needs, after-all Steam sales clearly showed how much a game is worth and I refused to pay more than those prices for any new experiences. It was while browsing the sales, void of any interesting games that I remembered the supposed gold mine of pirating roms for old titles."
(laughs) Of course, the booty of the intellectual pirates!
Yarr a gamecube game? There ain't no treasure in that mate!
"With reluctance I searched online, using caution to ward off the FBI hounds that might seize upon my inexperienced hands. After a surprisingly brief search I found a somewhat legitimate looking page of N64 games, it merely stated I needed to own a copy originally to be allowed to download the rom, and of course, they had no way to check that I lost my old copy. I clicked to download Super Mario 64 and within a few minutes the download had completed along with that of the N64 emulator. I took a sip from my drink." Yeah we know that feeling. "Then started the game."
Are we about to start the horror?
Of course! "I was pleasantly surprised by how fun and enjoyable this old game still was, even without the controller Mario still controlled fluently. I played around in-front of the castle briefly before entering the painting of Bob-omb Battlefield, the classic cheery vocal arrangement played before entering and BAM! I was enjoying some classic Mario goodness. I effortlessly cleared the entirety of that level collecting all stars with ease, the game was just as I remembered it in the past and there were more levels to come! I had the whole floor open to me, Whomp's Fortress, Jolly Roger Bay and even the classic hidden slide. Of course the slide was first, it always was, but then I had a choice to make. Water levels are the work of the devil."
(laughs) Oh no, not all that Hell water!
"And Whomp was a push-over so I wanted more of a challenge, I picked the classic ice level. Cool, Cool Mountain. That, it would turn out, was my biggest mistake. The painting room was barren except for a single deep red carpet that flowed towards the painting, it was slippery just like the ice-level itself and nothing could stop Mario from sliding right into the painting. This struck me as odd but not as odd as the resulting effect when the painting was entered. The screen flashed blood (pause) red."
Oh here we go.
"And there was a loud blood (pause) curdling scream, before the screen faded some hands reached out from the flowing carpet grasping at the nearby solid floor for release. Then it hit me. The carpet was also blood (pause), blood (pause) that flowed from the door into the painting as if countless mutilated bleeding (pause) bloody (pause) bodies were dragged towards their doom. Just like Mario. The screen was not white, it was blood (pause) red with static almost as if my monitor was broken like an old TV failing to tune into the level. The cheery vocal track was replaced with a rough demonic dubstep remix voiced by blood (pause) curdling screaming women. I was horrified by the title of the star, it was not 'Slip Slidin' Away' but was instead 'Descend the Slide of Blood' (pause).
Oh of course it was!
"I entered the level, and was immediately struck by a horrific sight, the whole mountain was covered in blood (pause) and when I said covered I meant the mountain was literally bleeding (pause) hyper-realistic blood (pause) there was no snow it was all blood (pause) the trees were dripping profusely with the remains of some unseen massacre which left only blood (pause) in its wake. I entered the blood (pause) covered chimney pipe which was bleeding (pause) more blood (pause) over all the windows which masked the scene of dead bodies covered in blood (pause) on the inside. Upon entering the pipe a sudden blood (pause) curdling scream pierced my headphones and a huge torrent of hyper-realistic blood (pause) spurted out the pipe like a geyser, as if Mario had just been violently minced by some unseen threat. The whole screen went back to the same static blood (pause) coloured screen as before and the blood (pause) curdling scream continued for a solid minute before the slide section of the level loaded. What I saw only horrified me, a whole pile of dead Marios littered the blood (pause) soaked floor all covered in the hyper-realistic blood (pause) of the Mario above them, each bleeding (pause) themselves onto the ones below to cover them all in blood (pause)
Oh for fucks sake!
This is ridiculous, does he not know another word besides blood? (pause)
Well he said bleeding (pause) before.
You two don't need to make shots when you say blood (pause) yourselves ya know? Ah fuck'd it back to the story. Where was I? "The whole slide was covered in blood (pause) no not just covered, the slide WAS blood (pause)"
It WAS blood! (pause)
Of course it's blood (pause) what else could it be?
"The slide was made from the blood (pause) of Mahrio, all the blood (pause) combined from each and every Mahrio before him that had died, the blood (pause) they bled (pause) bleeded (pause) down and became a slide of blood (pause) to help Mahrio in his quest so this time, at least he could succeed. I made Mahrio slip and Shlide down the bloody (pause) slide of his former lives' blood (pause) and he sheemed to be havin' fun. That was until ah noticed beneath the shlide of blood (pause) the bottomless pit was instead filled with Mahrios, all bleeding (pause) and grinning up at Mahrio with their evil bloody (pause) smiles, the shlide was disapparing behind him, the blood (pause) now obeying gravity and quickly dripping down to join the blood (pause) soaked bleeding (pause) Mahrios below. They sheemed to be welcoming the now blood (pause) stained Mahrio to join 'em in bloody (pause) death, an' Mahrio fell, he fell an' he screamed a female blood (pause) curdling skream just like the earlier skreams. A cut-scene showed where the blood (pause) stained Mahrio was grabbed by the other equally bloody (pause) blood (pause) stained Mahrios and they began tearing him apart, blood (pause) poured from every wound and gash they made, all bleeding (pause) with hyper-realistic (pause) blood that bled (pause) all over the entire bloody (pause) mess of blood (pause) stained bodies. The blood (pause) began to fill the shkreen as more and more blood (pause) made the blood (pause) level rise up to the top of the shkreen until my whole monitor was full of blood (pause) and it was so realistic I feared the blood (pause) would flood out of the schreen as the blood (pause) kept coming an' the blood (pause) curdling scream grew louder. The shcreene grew darker as eachh second pasht until all the blood (pause) had bled (pause)"
Ah can't drink anymorre fucken blood (pause) words
Then give up yer pansy we drank mre than thish with Shonic.exe
Not in a fucken row.
Shhut up wankers I'm tryin't read thish shit story of blood! (pause) Alright! Where was I? Blood! (pause) "Mahrio wash shut out of th' paintin' breakin' all of his, EVERY ONE of his body parts which all bled (pause) hyper-realistic blood (pause) and he attemptpts to get back up failed as the bloody (pause) bleeding (pause) blood soaked (pause) carpet of acktual blood (pause) flooded him down with it to the painting and blood (pause) curdlings sckreams rang ahgain an' they led to bloody (pause) skren of blood (pause)"
(coughs) Shtopp! Ah can't shtopp drinkinining when yeh sayin-
"Which bled! (pausing followed by sound of choking) more blood (pause) which bled (pause) and kept bleeding! (pause)
(watery choking) Pllessse!
Fucken what?! Just shtop drinkin' you caunt!
"Bleeding bloody blood!" (extended pause, choking intensifying)
Fukk! Jacob shtop weeding Toby's choking!
"And that blood bled too!"
(painful choking cuts out during a pause) Shhit! He's fucken' dead! What t'e fukk!
"More blood!" (pause)
I keep dyinking! Kant stop fucken stop weeding Jakob fucken' caunt!
"Mahrio bled, 'e bled, 'E BLED 'E BLED 'E BLED SO MUCH BLOOOOD!" (lengthy pause followed by a loud thumping sound and broken glass) "KEEPSH BLEEDEDED BLOOD! (pause) Bloody (pause) bleeding (pause) bloody (pause) blood (pause) bleeding (pause) jushtmpt lyke you! BLOODDDD! (A loud thump and liquid spilling echoes)
Uploader's note. Above is the automated Youtube subtitles for MichaelLeroi's final uploaded video. The bodies of the three users were found together near their computer, the cause of death was severe alcohol poisoning two days prior to the video being uploaded. Any attempt to find the creepypasta known as Blood, Blood Mountain only yields a link to a webpage which contains a list of names and aliases. The page is titled "Mockers of Creepypasta" and besides each name is an ironic death note. The first 3 names are crossed out along with the note "lethal drinking game". The next two names on the list are Slowbeef and Diabetus, their death notes read "Sonic 2006: Round 2."
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Mario
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:Overused Running Gag