Mario.exe

Hello I'n Thomas (im not actually Thomas that's the characters name) and I'm a really big fan of the game Super Mario 64. It came out in 1999 on the Nintendo 64 and was the first 3D before even Fallout 76! It's a very good game and I really like it but my Nintendo 64 broke due to old age and my emulator on the Switch expired because I didn't pay it in three years. Due to this I've been struggling with addiction due to my love of Mario 64 and I decided I needed to get an emulator but Project 64's a fugging virus so I got hacked any my computer blew up.
I was super sad but then on one spooky day Friday 13 666 a mailman came this mailman was named Burt and he was naked in his briches and super hairy I was confused to why he was there, but he threw an N64 at me, then threw the Mario 64 catridge then he disappeared into a puff of smoke. I was very confused aobut this but was happy that I coulkd paly MArio 64 so I put the disc in, and began to plasy it. 
Te tittle scereen was very spooky, as it had Mario on it, but mario looked spooky, then I clikc and Mario's eyes bled, and it said Mario 666, Mario Killed 59 people! Watch out he just, oh no!!!! I'm dead! For 0.3 milliseconds I was very scared, but wanted to play Mario 64, and decdied this was a bootleg so I clicked the file button and started the game.
The game started with Peach's letter, which it did, but it said 'Mario? Why did you just kill a child? That's not very moral, Bowser wouldn't go so far. Also, changing your shirt color was a stupid idea, yellow's a bad color. Wait, why are you grabbing the organs of yoshi and putting them around my throat- wait.. *cough, choke*' I was very scared, and started the game, but nto as Mario, but as Luigi. Luigi held a letter from Peach, but also one from Mario, which said 'Come to the castle.' Luigi gulped and walked to the castle, but the usual green grass was all grey, and the sun was blue Luigi, however, continued walking, and where Lakitu would usually appear, no one came
I was confused, tohugh entered the castle, which seemed normal I decided that the game was just somewhat odd, I did get it form Burt after all so I entered the room where you go to Bom-Omb Battlefield Luigi seemed scared, but I wasn't so I headed to Bom-Omb Battlefield, but I didn't go through the painting, but instead, I took the painting down, which led to a tunnel.
I went down the tunnel and Luigi seemed to freak out I was nervous as well seeing Mario out of the corner of my eye! But it was no normal Mario, he was covered in blood, and had multiple open injuries Luigi seemed to panic wheneveI saw this Mario, but we kept going deper and ddeeper, seeing rusty cages and writings in some bronw substtance and satanic symbols? I finally. Make it to a ligh, an odd lightbulb and Luigi begins nervously humming Suddenly Mario appears, causing me to jump and Luigi approaches nervously Mario limps forward, covered in blood with a knife. 
'M-Mario?!' Luigi askes, nervously approaching his brother, but Mario comes as well, limping with blood coming down his body I swear I saw Peach's head hidden in his shirt I try to control Luigi, but cannot, as Luigi gets closer and closer Luigi finaly makes it ot mario, and says hi
'B-brother! I missed you.' Luigi said, crying, but Mario stared at Luigi 'Brother. I'm so sorry.' Luigi looked confused at his brother 'What is it?' Mario raised his bloody knife 'I killed them all.' Luigi gasped. 'N-no you didn't!' Mario smiled softly 'But brother, I still love you. I have one piece of advice before you die too.' Luigi looked scared as Mario's smile grew. 'W-what?' Mario smiled, knife raised 'Run while you can.'
Suddenly, a man jumped out of nowhere. Mario tried to turn around and stab the man, but the man grabbed Mario's head and slammed it against the wall again and again and again until Mario's head was nothing but a bloody grape Luigi screamed as this man, Wario, looked at him with a crazed experssion.
I panicked, and turned off the N64. That was really creepy and I get scared easily, even Terrifier 2 freaked me out, so I was very scared, but decided I'd return the copy to Burt but before I could I heard windows breaking I suddenly panic as I heard footsteps downstairs, and I panicked. 
I stepped downstairs slowly, grabbing a metal bat, and saw Burt the Naked Hairy Mailman, clutching a rusty machete! I was scared, and Burt began looking for me, whispering he needed to see me but I hid in a closet Burt headed up the stairs, but before he could, I jumped out of the closet
Burt suddenly turned around and brought the machete onto my shoulder, causing it to gush blood, but I had the element of surprise, and brought the bat unto his head, hitting him multiple times. Burt fell to the ground, and as he tried to get up, I hit him again in the stomach, and took his machete I kept hitting Burt, and screamed at him. 'GET BACK UP YOU CREEP! TRYING TO WEIRD ME OUT WITH AN N64 THEN KILL ME?!!? THAT'S ILLEGAL!!!'
Burt smiled 'You gonna kill me?' But I was not happy 'NO! I'M GONNA HIT YOU AGAIN AND AGAIN TIL YOU CAN'T GET BACK UP!!!' Burt's face slightly sterned 'What a bad idea. Anyways, killing me won't do anything, there's much worse than me that's trying to get you.' I was confused, and asked 'What do you mean?'
Burt suddenly stood up but with a pistol from his pocket, and shot me three times in the stomach, 'Doesn't matter much when you're gonna die' I gasped, spitting blood, but Burt walked over to the window, and pulled out a phone
'I got the victim. Y'all ready?' Burt grunted
'Yeah, we're gonna kill this guy slowly, hopefully you could control yourself' The other person on the phone said
'Yep. He's here, and alive, though the little bugger hit me with a bat' Burt said
'Poor you. Well, we're coming, and we brought the salt, lemon juice and bleach.' The other person on the phone said. 
'Yep, then let's play that N64 Catridge. It's really spooky' Burt said
'You expanded that Wario escape scene?' The other man asked
'Yup.' Burt said.
Suddenly, I, who had been crawling to Burt, clutching his rusty machete, stood up. I, without hesitation, plunged the machete into Burt's stomach, causing Burt to gasp in pain and cough blood He dropped the phone, which I quickly stepped on, before suddenly Burt pulled his gun and shot my ear off I twisted the machete, cutting through his intestines, and grab the gun Burt holds on, though I re-direct his hand, and cause him to shoot away from me I then plunge my thumb into his hand's veins, causing Burt to drop his gun 
I twist the machete, stabbing it deeper into Burt, while with my other hand I grab his gun Burt coughes blood, blood dripping from his chin 'So, you beat me, eh? That's great, my life was a living hell. Take me outta my misery.' I was confused, 'Why do you want to die?' 'Because, he was my master, forcing me into eternal servanthood. That man is Wario, well not Wario exactly, the real life Wario. That N64 game's a re-creation of his murders, the specific level you did was the murder of my brother, I was Luigi, but instead of killing me, he let me live as a servant, finding more people to spooky with 'cursed' media re-creating his kills and killing them. Thanks to you, however, I'm free. I'm finally free'
I was fed up with his annoying rambling, and fired, though the gun only clicked. I threw the gun to the side, and as he giggled, saying he was free, I stabbed him in the throat with the machete until he wouldn't move. Blood covered my clothes and the windows until finally his sing-song 'I'm free' was gone. But before I could celebrate, I heard a knock on the door. 
'Hey! Burt! You ok? You hung up on me, and my poor old son was sad! You don't want to make Waluigi Jr. sad, do you?!'
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Mario
Category:BATTELS
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:English Class Failure