nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Why Do You Make Us SUFFER

Hi i am Gary Newman. Most creepy things in minecraft are about "Herobrine"! However what im about to tell you is... Interesting. This might be my first atempt, but it is true.
The beginign
I was browsing the mc fourms one night! when I realized some one had responded to fourm i posted about mods.  It was from a user named Bob Eathen. The comment was, "Can you take this mod and finish it!" "I cant take it anymore." There was a download link. i cliked on it. A winRAR file for a mod came up. I installed it. I loaded up mc 1.7.2 forge, and the mod was installed. It was a mod that added more villagers! It did not work. there was no new mobs. it only added an empty spawn egg.
I thought it was bull crap that the mod did not work! I browsed the internet, played steam games, and spoke to freinds like normal. I checked my email and there was a email from Mr. Villager@SUFFER.com! It said "Why  do you make us suffer?" Why does everyone make us suffer?" I decided to play minecraft. after that crap got real.
The real part.
I loaded up minecraft. I played in a single player survivel world. I found a villege with no villagers just red stone whire everywhere. I found a nether portal. This was strange because nether portals don't apear in villages. There sings every where that said,"We have sufferd!" I enterd the nether porta! I spawned in netherack tunnle. In the chat it said. "lets play a game." "If i catch you, it is game over!" I got spped efect. I ran so fast with so much skill when i had to jump." I came to a wall a villager with red eyes was looking at me! it killed me! instead of saying you died it said, Now its your turn to suffer." I finally got what it all meant. Players kill villagers ,and greif them. I was so guilty, I KIILED VILLAGERS. I hear a scream help. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Gary Newman was found dead on the spot. The authoritys still can't figure out what happend." It was  probobly a heart atack. This messege was found on a note pad on his PC. With a note saying. "Why do allof you make us SUFFER!
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Minecrap
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Why Dogs Smell Each Other's Butts

When he asked, the dogs refused him.
You are unclean, they told Coyote,
you are not a dog.
So the dogs undressed for their sweatbath
and entered the sweatlodge without him.
Coyote envied the glossy fur coats
the dogs had hung outside the lodge.
He thought of stealing them,
but he decided not to.
Instead he threw the long coats
in a great pile,
and wiped his muddy feet across them.
Then he set fire to the sweatlodge roof 
and said in a loud voice:
Oh what will the dogs do now,
Coyote has taken their fur!
From behind a rock, Coyote sat laughing 
as the naked dogs rushed 
into the cold out-of-doors,
grabbing for a coat,
afraid there might be too few
to cover everyone.
Years later, as the story goes,
with every dog zipped in someone else's fur,
dogs smell each other's butts,
looking for their own.
Meanwhile Coyote is still grinning,
off in the hills somewhere,
rolling in red dirt,
thinking how crude
to be a dog,
how much more clean,
how much more fun
to be Coyote.
Category:Animulz
Category:Pre-Trollpasta
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Morons Attempting Poetry
Category:Shortpasta
Why Ghosts are Meant to be Unseen

The legend is that if you sit in three of the graveyard chairs from midnight until one minute after midnight, you will have the ability to see ghosts, but you will pay with your life. This, however, did not apply to three high school football players on Halloween Night in 2003. They pulled into the graveyard in the middle of a large, open area. They had heard the legend and decided to try it, but one of them refused. He sat down and watched the other boys ran from one chair to the other. Then he sensed that something was wrong.
Exactly one minute past midnight and getting cold he decided he was going to go home with or without them. He walked up to them and hesitantly stopped in front of them. His friend's, eyes widen with fright just stared at him. He walked up to them, put his hand on one of the boy's shoulders and smiled. "You see, it doesn't work guys. We should go home it's getting late."
They both looked up at him again; the boy closest to him whispered "I........can.......see.......you". He droped from his chair and slumped onto the ground lifeless. The other boy yelled "I KNEW WE SHOULDN'T OF, I KNEW HE..." Cut off from finishing, he was thrown out of the chair into a tree. Quickly he got up and he limped back to the car. He stoped, took a deep breath, he knew it was too late. He turned around to see his friend, smiling at him. "Told you not to try and find me".
Police found the car the next day along with the body of the first boy. The car, covered in blood and chunks of flesh, they could not make out the body of the other.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Rituwel
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Why I'm not a lighthouse keeper anymore

I sucked at my job. I made shadow puppets in the big light. It's not funny. A ship crashed. People died. It was like the titanic. There was a selfish bitch that didn't share a door and a man froze to death. They were like 6 feet away from shore. Why didn't they just swim to shore ask. There was a no swimming sign and they were all sticklers for rules.
It was July. It wasn't even cold. It took days for them to die but they just sat there. Eventually they started eating each other. Then someone made a no eating each other rule so they stopped.
One guy married a shark and they had a loving relationship, or so we thought. Turns out they had an open marriage and the shark thought it would be cool but after a while he was sick or the guy banging all the corpses and he got jealous and they broke up. The shark would bring around his new boyfriend but the guy saw it was a play for attention.
Some say if you go to that old lighthouse, you will see a help wanted sign because this happened yesterday.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Why I Don't Download Torrents Anymore

I downloaded a torrent of college sluts 19, but what I downloaded didn't have anything to do with college... or sluts.
So I was bored the other night and decided to hit up my favorite torrent site. As I was browsing the collections of stolen IP, I came across something I haven't seen before. Simply titled college sluts 19, I had to add it to my 4 TB hard drive of porn, you know, for a rainy day. IT'S NOT EXCESSIVE KAREN!!!!!!!!!
So I click the link and I'm teleported through my computer screen to a dark dungeon. "What's going on!" I scream as loud as I can. Just then I hear a key clink into the cell door. With a creak the door opens, and a tall man in a Hawaiian shirt enters the room.
"Hey fella, you ready for some college sluts?" He said in a raspy voice?
"Oh hell yea bro." I said.
He's beckons me through the door and says, "Ok then, just come through this door and you will have all the sluts you can handle."
As I inch closer to the door I start to get the feeling that something about this isn't right. I can see a bunch of dudes in the room all wearing blue wind breaker jackets with yellow 'FBI' printed on the front.
"Wait a second, is this a gay porn. Cuz I'm down with my LGBTQ, but I'm not, you know, "down" with it. Like I'm cool with it, but I'm not "cool" with it. Like I'm live and let live, but I'm not live and get sexed in my own butt."
"Just shut the hell up and come in the room" he says impatiently.
"Ok, jeeze," I say without sniffling and tears in my eyes. "I have feelings too dude. You shouldn't talk to your fellow human beings like that." But I'm not crying, it's just allergies.
So I walk into the room and long story short they arrest me for stealing copyrighted material. Karen if you read this don't go on my computer again. And bring me bail money. But if you don't have enough for bail, at least smuggle in my computer and external hard drive in here, you know, keister it, as we say on the inside. Don't forget the power cable.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Why I Don't Go Outside When It's Dark Anymore

This happened 3 weeks ago. Just to clarify I'm a 20-year-old guy btw. I go running every evening to stay in good shape and so that I sleep better, and by this incident it had started getting dark when I went running, around 7:30-8:30. I run along a pretty busy road that has a a hospital and a private school on, so usually there are people around when I run, but there wasn't this time.
I usually run while listening to music, so I had my phone in my hand when I got a text. It was from an unknown number, and it just said "you can't see me." I got a little creeped out but I turned my music back on. I guess I thought it was just someone messing with me.
So about 5 minutes passed and I was stretching my legs on the fence at the edge of a Lidl car park (shoutout to my boys in Europe). I got another text. It simply said, "your time is up." Now I was getting seriously creeped out, because there was no-one around at all. It was Sunday night and about 9 pm, so pretty much everyone was home, and I was in a rough area of town.
I started running home, and I got another text. I didn't look at it at first because I just wanted to get home quick and not get distracted by whoever it was messing with me. I checked the text quite soon though, as my curiosity was getting the better of me. The text simply read: "my time is now." I was pissed off at that point so I texted back, "who tf r u?" Not a moment after it sent I saw a large man come out from a hedge beside me. He ripped off his hoody and shouted: "JOHN CENA!" He rushed at me and body slammed me on the dirty ground, crushing my ribs and causing my teeth to shoot out of my mouth like M&Ms on a summer's day.
He lifted me and threw me into the air like a lawn dart, and I smashed into a moving car. Luckily it was only going 20 mph but it could have been a lot worse. I was in hospital for a week. Greatest wrestler of all time, Let's Not Meet.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Memes
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Why I Don't Rescue Children Anymore

A little backstory to how I got into my current situation. I woke up this morning and got in my car. I put the keys in and turned them. I pulled out of my driveway.
Now that your all caught up, I am driving down the road and this car turns onto the road directly behind me. I swear the guy is right behind me and it's like he is staring at me. I mean I know I'm right in front of him but I have an intuition for this stuff.
So after about fifteen seconds of this nonsense I have had enough. Like who does this guy think he is. Tormenting me like this. Throwing caution to the wind I pull over blocking the road. Everyone behind him starts honking. Someone yells something about impeding the flow of traffic. But I will not be silenced. This has gone on for long enough.
So I knock on the mans window. He's average size average build, male, just what you would expect a serial killer to look like. As I get to the window I see something completely unexpected. This...man...no not a man...this monster has kidnapped a child.
So again, with no regard for my own safety, I smash the mans window and grab the child from the car seat. The poor terrified child keeps screaming dada. "Don't worry sweetheart," I reassure her "I will get you back to your family." So I run, but it turns out everyone else is jumps out of their car and starts chasing me. 'Is there a kidnapper convention in town', I think to myself.
I keep running and just when I am about to lose hope, I hear a siren. For the first time ever, I am happy to see a cop. I run up to him and hand him the kid. Despite my protest, his partner throws me on the ground. I try to explain, but they don't listen.
From the back of the police car I see the officer hand the baby back to the psycho, who is doing his best acting, sobbing and hugging the child. Turns out the whole system is corrupt. From the doctor that diagnosed me to the jury who sentenced me to the judge that found me guilty.
So this will be my final update, as the spooky skeletons have me surrounded and are closing in. I'm writing this with a piece of my fecal matter on the wall of my cell. I am not crazy and I will not be silenced.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Skeletons
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Why I Now Hate Halloween

Hey kids! I'm just a young kid too, like you, just 30 years older! Whatevs, it's all good in da neighbourhood!
But you know what isn't good? Halloween. I just an experience that made me have to change my adult diapers.
I was chillin' like a villian, sittin' at home, waitin' for some kids to come to trick or treat at my crib, yo. There was the usual "vampire", "ghost", "zombie", "Tony Hawk" costumes, but one costume stood out. It's ingrained in my mind like a "rad" skateboarding video I saw once.
It was indescribably horrifying, like something out of your worst nightmares. It was an array of bones, arranged into human shape. It kept telling me to stop screaming, that it was only a "costume" and that it wasn't real.
But that wasn't the worst of it, no. It ripped it's own head off only to reveal a CHILD UNDERNEATH. IT HAD EATEN A CHILD!
I refused it candy, causing it to bombard my house with eggs that came out of God knows where!
This was easily the least "hip" experience of my life and needless to say, my heart prolapsed a lil' bit.
Next year, I'll just get my "homies" over and throw a cool partay and just try to forget about everything.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Why I Stopped Going to Public Restrooms

Hi, my name is Jonathan and I work as a photographer for a newspaper company. My friend and I were in our lunch break, and we went to a restaurant that's across the street to satisfy our hunger. It's a fast food restaurant, sort of. You tell the employee what meal you want and what kind of meat, vegetables, and sauce you want with it.
I told the employee what I wanted and my friend did too. We paid for the food and searched for a table to sit. We did and we began chewing our food.
My friend started the conversation and I was listening. We chat and chat.
...until eventually, I had to go to the restroom. I must have drank like 15 Dr. Peppers.
I felt like my bladder was about to burst, so I had to hurry. I got up, told my friend that I'll be back, and rushed to the restroom.
I tried to hurry, but the faster I went, the closer I was on wetting my pants.
I pushed the door open with my hands and ... I saw the most horrific thing ever.
Shit! Shit everywhere! Shit on the toilet, shit on the walls, shit on the floor, and shit on the sink. The shit looked smudged and it appeared in many different colors. Brown. Red. Green. Black?
Oh, the horror. It was horrible. The smell was horrible as well. I was covering my nose with my shirt, and I continued staring at the ugly. You're probably asking yourself. Why did you continue starring if it was disgusting to look at? I don't know either.
I feel bad for the people who had to clean all that nasty shit up. I hope they wear a gas mask.
I felt that my stomach began mixing my food up and it was about to erupt out of my mouth.
I covered my mouth and looked all over the restroom for a garbage can. Nothing! What the hell kind of restroom doesn't have a trash can.
So, I went back to the restaurant, running everywhere with my mouth covered and cheeks fully blown. I was trying my hardest to not let out the vomit or I'll give the janitors extra work. No fucking trash can! This is some chicken shit!
I quickly rushed out the restaurant. Looking all of my surroundings for a trash can! Nothing! Where's a fucking trash can when you need one! I crossed the street and back to the building where I work. I found a trash can next to a few seats. Quickly rushed over there and let everything out that I had for lunch! My mouth felt soggy and I could almost taste my own vomit! I know... eww. My friend was behind me, asking if everything was alright! I nodded my head and left the building, because I still needed to go to the restroom... oh wait, I wet my pants while I was looking for a trash can. I remember. Everyone was laughing at me.
So anyway, I don't trust public restrooms anymore! You never know what horrors lay within them.  
Category:Trollpasta
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Potty Humor
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Why I Wanna Fuck Luigi

we all know that luigi is the sexiest motherfucker roaming our universe, but my love for him goes deeper than that. his beautiful blue eyes and his well brushed mustache instantly make me cum everytime I look at them. the shape of his body is beautiful beyond human comprehension, no human could ever remotely compare to the perfectness that is luigi. and as mathew patrick from the popular youtube channel game theory has explained in one of his videos, luigi also packs quite a spicy noodle. there is nothing more godly for me than being dominated by luigis massive mushroom cock while I stare at his beautiful body the whole time. I want to have an intimate and romantic relationship with luigi but I've learned that this can never become reality. therefore I've decided that I will tonight cover myself in all my copies of super luigi u and will commit suicide happily knowing that luigi awaits me in the afterlife.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Mario
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Suicide
Why I couldn't make Sonic the Hedgehog real

I'm a real huge Sonic fan (isn't everybody these days?), have been since I was in diapers. I was in diapers until 14, but that's besides the point. I lived my life for the blue rat, but through droughts in games after Forces, the new punching bag of the gaming community, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I was going to summon Sonic the Hedgehog into my world, damn it, and I knew how.
Many of you are not as big of Sonic aficionados as I, so let me tell you something. Sonic has a tendency to... let's just say, "cross over" into other worlds. I decided to practice some magic on my CRT while plugging in a SEGA Genesis system, did a few incantations in tongues, and voila! That should've been easy...
Except I had the wrong cartridge put in! It was a copy of Bubsy 2. I know this is the part of the story where I'd say "don't judge me", but judge me all you like. Bubsy the Bobcat materialized into my living room and threw yarn at me. "Oh wow! I've been transported to the real world! What could possibly go wrong?" He started jumping up and down, somehow being able to glide. Hey, buddy! You can't do that without an explanation! You can't turn your twin tails into a helicopter or utilize your spiny dreadlocks to ride across the wind!
Bubsy is my roommate now, and suffice to say things are a lot different. Instead of singing me to sleep, he throws out an endless array of cat puns until I grow too tired to stand them. He ocassionally gets visits from the Woollies, you know, those aliens with the big noses that sit there and do nothing. Yeah. He somehow manifests an atom and projectile launches it at them. It's not much, but I tolerate the company. Plus he earns plenty of cash from his side-hustle as a comedian, in which people pay him money to shut up.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Sonic
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Why I didn't sleep last night

So it was really late at night, and after multiple hours of binge online gaming, I decided to finally go to bed.
Before that I needed to take a piss, so I go to the toilet. I see my cat being sneaky in the corner of the bathroom, where is the box it pees in (I don't know what it's called). It's a big, beautiful cat, yellow and green eyes, and long, thick, soft hair that range from golden to black. It is a kind animal, always very cute, and I love him. But it is very shy and not very social.
Anyways, after I got my business done, I get back to my room. I left my door open, and the cat has sneaked into my bedroom, I see the tip of it's cute black ear pointing from behind the bed. It's pretty unusual for him to go in my room, and that makes me happy he decided to sleep in here tonight.
He jumps onto the bed and I lay down beside him, overwhelmed by a load of furry, purry cuteness. But just when I lay my hand to stroke the beast, it hit me. The SMELL. Not your usual uneasing animal smell, but the stench of a thousand demons rotting deep in hell.
And there I see it: shit. Fucking cat shit all over my bed sheets. I push my pet from the bed, and as it reach the ground it crawls to a corner, leaving a trail of stinky cat crap all across the room.
I grab it behind the neck and throw him away from the bedroom, felling betrayed by the loved feline, and raging to the boiling point. When I turn back in the bedroom I realize the truth.
Crap got stuck in the cat's butt hair, and everywhere it passed, everything it touched, and any spot it sat or crawled in, there was shit. My room smelled like the men's room of an international bus station, my sheets needed to go directly to the washing machine, my floor needed to be mopped and scrubbed, and I had to wide open the windows to try and get rid of that putrid stench.
Cleaning cat shit took me what remained of my night.
Shitty no sleep.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Animulz
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep