nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Boneless Chicken

I was very hungry. Very very hungry. So hungry that I could eat an entire meal. I took it upon myself to drive to the nearest fast food establishment. The closest fast food establishment to my proximity was one known as Kentucky Fried Chicken. Kentucky Fried Chicken is obviously named after the 15th United State of Kentucky and sells fried consumable parts of the semi-avian bird, chicken.
I was on my way driving. I walked into the store to go buy some fried chicken. I asked for some chicken. The cashier says wait just a moment. I wait and the cashier gives me the chicken. I ate the chicken and it was delicious. However something scared me. "Where were the bones!?!??!? OH GOSH I DIDN'T EAT THE BONES DID I?! PLEASE TELL ME I DIDN'T EAT THE BONES! PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE TELL ME I DIDN'T SWALLOW THE BONES!"
While I was on my knees praying I realized that there were no bones in the chicken at all. Out of the kitchen comes a chicken skeleton with a knife. "Cluck cluck" he says from across the room. The skeleton chicken comes closer and closer. "Oh no it's going to eat me!" The chicken then jumped into my mouth and I swallowed every bone of its body. Even the skull. The chicken reassembled himself in my body. I felt I had no control. The only thing I had control over was my consciousness. I started walking out of the store against my will. I tried to say something, but even my mouth was unable to move. I start walking to a random house that was near the Kentucky Fried Chicken. I knock on the front door someone answers the door. I start talking without any control of what I'm saying. I say "Hello. Would you be interested in signing up for a water cooler subscription? If I can get 5 people to sign up, I will be able to get a promotion which can earn up to 6 figures. Just scan this QR code. We are also hiring so I can help you through the interview process." I said this to over 200 houses that day, and only 2 people signed up.
The moral of the story is to not eat the bones in the chicken. You could end up working in a Multi Level Marketing scheme.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:EVIL FOOD
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Bonered by Werewolves

Right outside my home there is a very scary woods. It's even more scary when you discover that a lot of werewolves live back there. Everyday I have to take a different path to get home so they don't follow me. Sometimes I forget and they'll be on the path, waiting for me. They boner me and give me worg wedgies. I don't want to explain what a worg wedgie is, it's just too humiliating. The only good thing is they keep the vampires away and I don't really like vampires. Also Kate Beckinsale lives upstairs and I'm trying to get it in with her.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Animulz
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Bones

The other day, I got this email from my best friend. I'll call her Bobette to protect her.
 
This was the last I'd ever heard from her. My best friend... I need to go find out what happened to her. I run over to her house and kick down the door. The only thing inside, is a blood covered Xbox. It has a game sticking out of it. I picked up the game and took it to my house, where I put it in my ps4.
THE END
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Unnecessary Sequels
Category:Vidya games
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Bonfire Night Surprise

Nothing abnormal had ever happened to me up until now, but I'm definitely not the easiest to frighten. Not even that jump scare at the end of one of the Paranormal Activity movies spooked me. But I must say – when scary things happen in real life, it's scientifically proven that they're sixty times scarier.
Anyway, my story begins on the eve of a windy winter afternoon. It was just going on dusk, and I was heaving wood out of a wheel barrow for a bonfire with some friends I was having later tonight. It was supposed to be a load of fun. Guests had begun arriving at this point, I lived on acreage in a rural area, so many of them had utility trucks or heavy-duty four wheel drives. Everyone had arrived, including Stanley who wasn't invited because I hate that guy. I didn't make him leave, however, because I didn't want to be a dick, and plus, Stanley never gets invited to anything – maybe he'll be alright. The night was going well and everyone was having fun, except Stanley but that was because he wasn't invited. About halfway through the night, Stanley suddenly stood up and screamed "EVERYONE HERE IS A SKELLINGTON AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO" while ripping my best friend Craig's chest open. But, much to my surprise, it revealed a white rib, rich in calcium and marrow. I shouted in fear as Stanley ripped Erica next. She was a skellington too. I immediately sprinted to my car while Stanley ripped open my friends, one by one, exposing the rigid secrets they'd hidden inside their soft, squishy flesh. I got to my car, but it wouldn't start – I had no escape. I locked all the doors and replaced the foam inside the seat with my squishy, non-skeletal self. I lay strategically positioned inside the seat, when, from behind me, I hear a loud scratching sound on the rear window. I jumped, frightened. I closed my eyes as the scratching sound moved around the car to the passenger side window just next to me, where it ceased. The bad man and/or woman must've fallen for my seat hiding ruse - I was safe. I opened my eyes when skellington doot bones hook car doot
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Skeletons
Category:Memes
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Bonzi.batch

For anyone who is unaware, BonziBuddy, was a free, Purple ape, office assistant like program which helped you browse the internet, understand a computer, and have fun. In 2008, speculation rolled in about Bonzi was sopposoply a spyware and malware program. There was so much hate mail, that the creator of the ape took the file down, never to surface again.
== Bonzi ==
Hey, whats going on! My name's Jacob.
Do you remember that stupid malware program, BonziBUDDY? Yeah, that monstrosity. It's like they just said, "HEY KIDS, YOU WANT A HARMLESS APE? YOU WANT A F*CKING HARMLESS APE?! HERE YOU GO! ACCEPT THIS FREE VIRUS ALONG WITH IT!"
When I was a kid, everyone at my school had the ape on their computers, without knowing soon their computers would become infected.
I learned that the hard way. How you may ask?
Let me tell you.
A while back I heard rumors about a new program that was voted #1 in best XP programs. It was called BonziBuddy. I read some things about it, and by that I mean glancing at its Wikipedia page, it was pretty cool.
I went to bonzibuddy's website and I shook with excitement that I was soon gonna be a member of 'bonzi nation'. I moved as fast as I could to download this amazement. My smile decreased 20% as i noticed it was a Zip folder.
"I thought it was a installer..." I said, shaking off the fact that it wasn't an installer. I opened up winRAR and got that stupid "Buy our shit" message. I ignored it, extracting the file into a folder.
(Pasta not finished yet)
Category:Trollpasta
Category:TOTALLY NOT UNFINISHED U GUIZE
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:File Extensions
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Shortpasta
Boobs.

Hello. Scroll down to see boobs.
Further.
You probably thought you would see boobs, or read about boobs on this page. Well, you thought wrong. You've encountered a troll pasta where the title and first technical paragraph is literally lying to you, and trolling you to the hardest extent, because of your fascination with women's upper body parts, you freakin' perv.
Why? Because fuck you, that's why. Because I enjoy watching you writhe in agonizing rage over the fact that you were hoping to see a huge pair of breasts covering your computer screen. Because I enjoy seeing you hope to get a new pair to add to your "boobs" folder, only to come up disappointed that it didn't happen because I am a bitch. Whilst you are doing this, I am drinking my medium Dr. Pepper and eating a Filet O' Fish that has extremely flexible bread, for some reason, and I am laughing my ass off.
I am laughing even harder if you are another girl, because it's just somehow more hilarious than when men do it. And I am laughing harder at the fact that the first part of the page was probably given away on the Wiki Activity and you still expected a pair of boobs.
Come on, get even more asshurt about it. You are simply feeding my ever growing lust for misery, watching you inflate and turn red while I sit here and laugh my fucking ass off. Besides, I couldn't post boobs if I wanted to. Ever read Wikia's ToU?
You probably already had your dick out, ready to whack, you fucking pervert. And I have turned you off. So you are screaming about in your room over this, with your fapper flapping about all over the place. I am imagining this in my mind and it's fucking hilarious.
And you see the PATRIXXX on the sides of the page? In the background? They're looking at it, thinking "I want some of dat shit." They'd probably suck on it, maybe even bite and tear it off. Not like you're using it for anything, ahem.
And I am laughing hardest that you have spent the last two minutes reading this piece of shit. So even though you may not have fell for it, you have just wasted those two minutes, or more, or less if you're sensible, of your life. Two minutes of your life that you can never get back. Those two minutes where you could've done something completely productive have been wasted on this. Me? I don't care about my life. That's why I wrote this.
So, in conclusion, in the most of minor of ways, this trollpasta has succeeded. Because it has trolled you, reader, and your dumb, dumb ass fell straight for it.
Goodbye.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:The Title Is A Lie
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:Trollpasta
Boogie Man

I have trouble sleeping at night, in fact, I rarely sleep at night. I spend my nights on the computer, reading this and that on the internet. Creepy stories, philosophy and psychology related documents, it interests me greatly. I stay awake all night, reading, or talking to friends on Facebook while drinking cups of tea. I like my tea. I gather my lost sleep during the day, like at school. I find that English is the easiest, or music class.
Last night I read this one particular story that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. It was titled, 'the boogie man.' I thought that sounded cliché, but my curiosity bested me once more, so I decided to read, there wasn't much else to do at 3:30 in the morning.
The story was pretty long, it took me an hour to get through it, but I am glad I read it, it was really well written. According to this, the boogie man comes when everyone but its victim are in a deep sleep. He walks around your house and gently taps on the window, trying to find which window is the one for your bedroom. He starts to tap louder and more violently as he gets closer to you.
The victim in the story I read was at her computer in her bedroom just surfing the internet, and she started to hear this tapping sound. She turns her head, looking around her room cautiously, but the tapping stopped. She continued what she was doing, and the tapping started up again, this time, a lot louder. A little paranoid, the victim stood up and walked to her bedroom door and made sure that it was locked. She then walked towards her bedroom window to make sure that nothing could see or get inside.
Just as she was about to sit back in her chair by her computer, the tapping returned, this time it sounded like it was coming from within her room. Starting to freak out, she started to search her room for the source of the noise. She checked in her closet, in the drawers of her desk, under the doona on her bed, and under her bed. As she lied on the floor, she saw two bright green eyes staring back at her. She screamed and jumped up hitting her head on something hard. She fell to the ground. She struggled to roll over and she saw a giant, furry creature, too tall for her room. It started to breathe heavily and leaned over her, studying her. It moved its hand and reached down for her throat. He gripped her by her throat and pulled her up, choking her. She claws on the giant hand around that was cutting off her airways and kicked and beat at the monster, but to no avail. Her face changes colors from red to blue to green and then to brown, the color of the monster. As its grip tightened around her fragile neck, she went limp, she stopped flailing her arms and legs at it and the monster let the limp body fall to the floor.
With a flash of bright light, the Boogie Man instantly vanished.
I turn my computer off as my eyes were starting to fail to stay open. Just as I was about to crawl into bed, I heard a tapping.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Beings
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Boogie People

Okay, so I was in this mall minding my own buisness when suddenly I noticed nobody else was there. Then I heard voices singing Boogie Fever only it said Boobie People instead. It got louder and louder until I could hear a voice say "Run! The Boogie People are coming for you" Before I could ask who said that, suddenly a bunch of 70s disco people flew out of the window and they came after me! then there was so many boogied peepole that the mall explodei and everyone died!
ahsosahdlasjdhasousdhKeihaofushsadlsadhoaSashdolSUADHSADLhasouhsAouaSHousa
BOOGIE PEOPLE....
GOT TO BOOGIE DOWN....
BOOGIE PEOPLE....
I THINK THEY'RE COMING FOR YOUR SOUL MUAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHSHITTYFUCKDIARHEADUMPFUCK
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Rocks Fall, Everybody Dies
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Old Shit
Book With Flowery Cover

I was walking home from school one day. It was a cloudy day and it looked like it was going to rain. I sped up my pace so that I could get home before it started to pour. But I was too late, it started to rain really hard. So I ran into the neareest store which happened to be a book store. Since I was going to be here for a while I figured I might as well look through the store.
I was browsing through a shelf when one particular book caught my eye. It was pink and had flowers decorating the cover of it. The title had been too faded out for me to make out what it said.
Suddenly I felt a tap on my shoulder. I spun around in suprise and found a petite women wearing glasses behind me. She smiled at me and said, "Do you like that book? You can have it if you want." I didn't realy want the book so I declined. But she insisted on me taking it. The rain had stopped outside and I didn't really want to waste my time arguing with her so I took the book and got out of there. After I got home I tossed the book on a table and forgot about it the whole day.
Two weeks later my apartment had a blackout. I was so bored with no internet connection, or television. My phone had conviniently happened to run out of battery at that time too. That's when I remembered the book I recieved 2 weeks ago. The one with the flowery cover that the petite woman with glasses at the bookstore gave me. I was curiour about its contents so I picked it up and started to read.
The book wasn't bad, it was a series of stories about princesses getting rescued by princes and that disney crap. Some of the stories I was familiar with like Cinderella and Snow white, but most of them I've never even heard of before.
As I read the stories the room seemed to be getting hotter with every story I finish. When I reached the last story the table next to me bursed into flames. A section of the floor just collapsed and flaming hands shot out. They grabed my legs. Their touches seared and melted my flesh when they pulled me in screaming for my life. Before I was dragged into the fiery abyss completely I saw the title of the book being burnt into its cover.
The title read: "Codex Gigas"
(Codex Gigas is also known as Devil's Bible)
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Old Shit
Boom Shakala

One day, I was browsing gamejolt for some awesome sauce games to try out, when all of a sudden, my friend, Jimbob Marmalade, sent me an e-mail
"Hey broski, I know how much you hate that McDonalds Mascot right? Well, I dare you to watch this mysterious lost advertisement I found about him. Anyway, here you go! Good luck :)"
A video file called HappyMealAd.webm was attached to the e-mail. He was right when he mentioned the McDonalds mascot. No, not Ronald, but rather, that new guy they made in 2009, Happy. He's a happy meal box with eyes, a mouth, as well as limbs.
I was cautious to say the least. I wasn't outright afraid, but put off by him.
"Fine, I'll check it out," I said to myself. Opening the file in my preferred media player, MPV, it seemed normal, just that one advert, featuring the song, Boom Shakalaka by ApacheIndian. However, one of the happys (Yes they are plentiful) had bloodshot eyes and had a bag. The song then stopped as one Happy stared at me and said "You will die in 6 and a half days, but before that, let's have some fun, shall we?" in a deep voice.
"Oh no," I thought. What fun was it referring to? Well, my question was answered near instantly, as he whipped a shotgun out of his bag, and blasted at the Happys. It was odd though. One question I always had was if they had blood or some other similar thing. But there was no blood, not even any of the hyper realistic type. Maybe the creator of this thing was too lazy? Anyway, the evil Happy grabbed a grenade launcher, firing it the remaining happy.
Finally, he stared at me. "Well, I guess my job here is done. See you soon...". Then, the normal ending appeared, with the McDonalds Happy Meal being advertised. "That was a waste of time..." I thought. Seriously, I don't feel threatened in the slightest. Like at all. Guess I'll see what will happen in six days...
Category:Trollpasta
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:Shortpasta
Boomhauer Language

The Boomhauer language is a language spoken by Boomhauer, a character from King of the Hill. Here's the guide on how to speak it.
==Talkin' about...dang old==
The Boomhauer language uses a system that usually puts "dang old" in front of almost every noun and frequently, "talkin' about" at the beginning of some verbs. See the example.
"Hey man I tell ya what man dang old boy ain't right man I'm talkin' about kickin' his dang old ass man." (My boy ain't right I'm kicking his ass.)
"Talkin' about" will most-likely happen in first-person verbs. See the third-person example.
"Dang old government takin' away the dang old freedom of smoke man." (The government is taking away the freedom of smoke.)
If there is an adjective directly before the noun, the adjective will be placed between the "dang old" and the noun. See the example.
Correct: Dang old pretty pizza.
Incorrect: Pretty dang old pizza.
Hey man I tell ya what man - dang old - noun - talkin' about - verb.
==Hey man I tell ya what man...man==
Sometimes, the final "man" in "hey man I tell ya what man" can be replaced with the name of the addressee. See the example.
"Hey man I tell ya what Hank..."
The final "man" in the speech or writing is never changed.
==Final test==
You will be given five phrases in Boomhauer. See if you can understand them.
#"Hey man I tell ya what man dang old boy ain't right man I'm talkin' about kickin' his dang old ass man."
#"Hey man I tell ya what man dang old government helicopters man ain't no good man. Talkin' about flying all over the dang old place watchin us man."
#"Hey man I tell ya what man that dang old internet can get ya dang old pictures of naked girls man."
#"Hey man I tell ya what man the dang old MegaloMart talkin' about dang old BOOM!"
#"Hey man I tell ya what man back in dang old early America man. Talkin' about havin' dang old freedom and democracy man now dang old Obama talkin' about 'We watchin' you!' man."
If you were able to understand the previous Boomhauer phrases, then congratulations, you passed the test and are now are able to speak and understand Boomhauer perfectly. If not, get the fuck outta here, you motherfucking cock-sucking bi-AND THEN A HYPER-REALISTIC SKELETON IN A PATRIXXX COSTUME POPPED OUT AND YOU DIED.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Boost the smiling wolf and smiledogs brother

during the summer of 2000 police were called to a house with a broken window suspects say that the window was made by a blue wolf others say it was smiledog but it was neither it was boost the goody two shoes brother of smiledog who had dashed into kill smiledog but ended up killing 2 adults , 1 2 month old baby and a chuwawa but he would not rest until smiledog dies he has no profile picture and no eye-witness has seen him or found his home all that people know is that his paw size is 4 cm long and jaws can rip 12.34 metres in glass without losing teeth if you see him him he
has blue fur with patches of white
he has ruby red claws and shards of ruby on his back
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Animulz
Category:MARY SUE ALERT
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Shortpasta
Bootleg Spiderman game

One day, I was walking around. An old man in a white van appeared. He told me to get in. He drove me back to my house. He gave me a disk. the disk said "Bootleg Spider-Man". I went on my computer and put the disk in. Surprisingly, instead of it being some weird movie, it was a game. The file name was "Spider-Man.EXE". I clicked the file. A title screen appeared. It was Spider-Man and venom fighting. I pressed start. It brought me to a house. Text came up that said "Get venom before he bangs Aunt May". I was able to climb up walls to I climbed up the house. It show a cut scene. "Don't bang my aunt", said Spider-Man. "OK penis parker", said venom. Then venom threw Spider-Man of the roof. blood came out everywhere. The blood came out of my screen. Then it started to flood the room. Then I died. I am currently in a purgatory where I have to look at Spider-Man x venom porn. My life sucks.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Im died
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Vidya games
Category:Shortpasta