Muffy's New Best Friend/Transcript

=== Introduction ===
Francine cycles past Arthur and Buster.
Francine: Hi! Can't stop! Going to Muffy!
Arthur: The most perfect best friends I know are Francine and Muffy. They're always happy for each other.
Muffy is admiring her shoes as Francine comes in with a letter.
Francine: I've got it!
Muffy: Ah! Hurray!  Got what?
Francine: My acceptance for soccer camp.
Muffy: That's so great Francine.
Francine: You're my best friend, and I just had to come right here and tell you first.
Muffy: Something great happened to me to.
Francine: What?
Muffy: Ramaine Woosel Shoes.
Francine: Oh, that's so great, Muffy.
Arthur: And they like to do everything together.
Muffy: We need to celebrate. What should we do?
Francine: Play soccer!   /   Muffy: Go shopping!
Muffy imagines being taken off the soccer field on a stretcher. 
Francince imagines being taken out of a store on a stretcher while Muffy is still trying on clothes.
Francine+Muffy: That sounds great.
Arthur: I thought they were perfect best friends.
=== # ===
Muffy tries to call Francine. The quick dial buttons are labelled: Francine, Fire, Police, Ambulance, Hairdresser and Grandma.
Muffy: I wonder if she's sick.    
Catherine is lying on her bed talking on the phone.
Catherine: So he said, you're impossible. And then I said, you're impossible. And then he said, no, you're imposs-   (Beep)  Just ignore the beeps. I hate call waiting. And I said, you're impossible.
=== # ===
Buster has a complicated theory, that an alien laser beam malfunctioned, knocked a soccer ball against Francine's head, and gave her amnesia.
Francine: Oh, hi, Muffy. Sorry I didn't... Hh! Your party. I'm so sorry. I totally forgot.
Muffy: How can you possibly forget?       Francine walks away sadly. Buster whispers to Muffy.
Buster: I won't say I told you so.
=== # ===
Muffy gives Brain a quiz to see if he's a suitable new best friend.
Muffy: Okay, here is the last question. Don't worry, it's an easy one. Which is more important: fashion or soccer?
Cut to the gate slamming in Brain's face.
Muffy: Sorry, I really thought you were going to pass.
Brain: So this is what failing feels like. Fascinating.
=== # ===
Fern: I feel shopping is a waste of time better spend reading poetry.
Muffy crosses out Fern's name three times.
=== # ===
In a restaurant at the mall.
Muffy: I must say you're the only candidate who passed every test. You love spending money, and you have a refreshing lack of tolerance for other people's stupidity. You're just about perfect in every way.   She is talking to D.W.
D.W.: This french fry is underfried. I demand a refund.    Muffy nods.
Mrs. Read: Time to go, D.W.  Thanks for watching her while I was shopping, Muffy.    They leave.
Muffy: If only you didn't have to take naps.
=== # ===
In front of a movie theater. Muffy's current best friend is Binky.
Binky: Do you want to see „Five Thousand Explosions and a Supernova“?
Muffy: Na. Francine said it's too talky.
=== # ===
After hoping to meet Francine at the soccer field, Muffy meets her at the clothes store.
Francine: I was thinking, it's okay if you don't like to play soccer. 
Muffy: And you don't have to shop with me. I mean, best friends don't have to be with each other twenty-four hours a day.
Francine: Right.  Hey, let's celebrate. What should we do?
Muffy: Em...
Francine: Er...
Muffy+Francine: Go swimming?   (laugh)
=== # ===
At sundown, Binky and Jenna are still on the soccer field.
Binky: Don't tell Muffy, but I think you're kind of more fun to play with.
Jenna: You're fun too. Hey, do you wanna see „Slobbering Idiots“?
Binky: Who wouldn't?
=== # ===
Muffy Crosswire: It came right off my foot! There's a lawsuit in this somewhere. (phone beeping) Daddy, shoe emergency—soccer field. Maybe I should let you practice alone so I can tell cook what hors d'oeuvres to make for your party! (horn beeping) It's going to be so much fun tonight!
Buster Baxter: I know, after you left the soccer field, some aliens came down...
Muffy: Yeah right, and they kidnapped Francine I suppose.
Muffy: Hey, what's going on here, Francine?
Francine: Well...
Muffy: And how did you just forget last night? I set up the whole awards show party just for you.
Francine: I know. Well, we were playing soccer and then Jenna said she had the new soccer bloopers video...
Muffy: What?
Francine: I said I was sorry. You never asked me if I wanted to watch the awards and it was my day to celebrate and if I'm going to soccer camp I need to practice.
Muffy: Well, I... I can play soccer. I can! I just had a shoe emergency! You saw!
Francine: It's okay, you don't want to play soccer
And you don't have to shop with me
Category:Season 4 transcripts
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