The Jam

The Jam were a UK band initially created in the late 1970s as a cunning suit marketing ploy, comprised of handsome male models Paul Weller (The Modfather), Bruce Foxton and Rick Buckler. It was the tight fitting trousers that first allowed Weller and Foxton to constantly jump up and down.Their first single "In the city "was dedcated to their London tailor most noted in the line "In the city there's a thousand things I wanna do to you, you bastard", this was written soon after discovering the trousers could only later (around 2006 according to some sources) be removed surgically. They were initally,however,expected to stand still in a shop window in Lewisham, London, holding musical instruments in order to make the suits look cool. However, they quickly grew bored of this, and started trying to play their instruments to alleviate the boredom.Weller was quoted at the time"Corr!,that's wot dis f**king guitars for,".
The noise they made was atonal and frankly terrifying to all but the bravest tone deaf humans, but this did not deter them. Instead they swapped their instruments from the original kazoo, penny whistle and trombone they had been given as birthday presents, and the new guitar, bass and drums turned out to sound much better together. Their confidence quickly blossomed, and they started writing songs.
They were sacked by the store manager for taking attention away from his stylish bri-nylon suits. The store owner was quoted "I sent those ungrateful bast***ds back to Woking and I just hope I get my suits back one day". But they were now a band! (And they kept the suits anyway, as they quite liked them).
== Music ==
After rejecting some songs written by Gary Numan and Bruce Forsyth, the band quickly settled on the "Mod" style of music, although no-one was satisfactorily able to define exactly what that meant. Buckler and Foxton grew to be an extremely tight rhythm section, and as with all good rhythm sections went completely un-noticed while guitarist/singer Weller took all the plaudits.
Paul Weller quickly established himself as the band's creative and stylistic focus by the underhand tactic of being the only decent songwriter.
The band quickly established their groundbreaking "guitar, bass, drums and singing" style, which helped them to stand out from the other bands at the time. They also stood out from other bands at the time by voting Conservative - another smart move by Weller, designed to make the band seem coolWorryingly, this is true.
==Career==
thumb|right|Weller overshadowing the others as usual|250px
===Early Success===
The Jam were successful quite early and many youngsters at the Sheerwater youth club liked them ;"My dad and Mum said I could come cos it ends at 7" Simon Bottomsley aged 9; "When I am big I want trousers like that too"Greg Pritchard Aged 4 (Greg eventually did get such trousers and discovered Higher octave music). .
===String Of Successful Albums===
The Jam followed up their early success with a string of successful albums.The string was once used to hold their singles too and on one occasion even tow start the band's aging Ford Transit..
===Breaking Up After A Farewell Tour===
The Jam finally broke up after a farewell tour as follows:
Weller: Well the farewell tour's over lads I'm off ,see you around guys
Buckler: Do What ! I thought Farewell was the name of the new album
Foxton: Yer, what the f**k is this all about Paul?
Weller: Well ,it's like this guys ,I wanna be a funky techno rap jazz soul brother now .So I ain't gonna spit and pogo no more 
Foxton : But we were doing well, the fans love us
Buckler: Yer, I told the the Lambretta society we were doing a new album "n"all.
Weller: Look ,face it, you ain't got what it takes ,you don't understand my artistic soul and , and ,and you just ain't black .So fuck off you two ,I'm running off home for my tea.
 
"A long and painful one minute silence ensues"
Buckler: So what happens now?
Foxton: Well I don't know about you but I'm gonna release a couple of singles, get in the charts and then,perhaps,well it's a stupid idea but......
Buckler: What!
Foxton: Well, I just might find an some aging punk band who might have me ,ummm yes that's it,What about you Rick?
Buckler: Umm well, I'm not sure,..... I quite like metal,you know heavy metal!!!,but .... I have a strong urge to work with wood too! oh well choices ,choices
Foxton: Ok, guess I'll see you around then
Buckler: Yer,see yer mate
==After The Jam==
Paul Weller went on to have success with the Style Council, and then as a solo artist. Bruce Foxton and Rick Buckler went on to watch Paul Weller's success, and not be bitter or resentful about it in the slightest, as evidenced in the below excerpts from Rick Buckler's diaries, edited slightly to improve readability, and not to remove traces of bitterness and resentment. Edits shown in italics original text included in footnotes:
Sept 4th, 1983
Start economy drive: stop using champagne on breakfast cereal, start ordering milk.
Weller's new band The Style Council are doing quite well. Great, just great. I'm particularly pleasedpissed off that the bass and drum parts are being handled by synthesisers - it really makes me feel specialshit to be replaced by £20-worth of microchips from Dixon's. Must get my own project off the ground some time soon, to keep Paul companykick that bastard's arse in the charts.
July 12th, 1985
Reduce milk order.
The Style Council continue to go from strength to strength. I couldn't be happier forfucking hate him. I bet he misses me and Bruce though. Synthesisers can't be such good conversationalists as us. Maybe I'll call him up and see if he fancies playing a few gigs as The Jam again, for old times' sakeI hate to say it, but I need the bastard's help.
July 13th, 1985
No he doesn't. Oh well, such is lifeFuck. Good luckBollocks to him.
Dec 9th, 1989
Cancel milk, start stealing next door's.
Weller split up the Style Council. The poor chap must beI'm getting really short of a few bob. Maybe I'll offer to reform the Jam with him to help outI really need this.
Dec 9th, 1989
He's still not interested, seems he's going to try a solo career. Although of course I wish him all the bestEgotistical wanker, I can't see that lasting, so my offer to re-form the band is still open, in case he getsas I'm getting fucking desperate.
January 12th, 1999
Complete community service for milk pilfering.
Weller's solo career is going well. I'm really pleasedI can't believe how spawny he is he's proved my prediction wrong. They're even calling him "the Modfather", and an influence on modern music. That's great, he wrote all the songs, he deserves all the attentionMe and Bruce weren't just window dressing you know (well, not after we left the shop window anyway), where's our respect, you bastards?!. Bet he's getting nostalgic for the old days though. I may offerbeg to play some Jam shows with him.
August 8th, 2006
Start job as milkman
Weller was quoted on the radio as saying a Jam reunion will "never, ever happen" as reunions are "sad". Fine, I can respect his opinionBastard!.
==The Inevitable Reunion==
In 2006, tired of making obscene sums of money from their hugely successful post-Jam careers, Buckler and Foxton decided to give something back to the Fans, and started touring together, playing classic Jam songs. The reunion was hailed as a tremendous success by Foxton and Buckler's parents. The duo kindly offered to take Weller on their next tour with them, if he felt like it. He has yet to respond.
==References==
Category:British musical groups
pt:The Jam