Pokemon Creepypasta: Don't Die

As a kid, I was always a huge fan of pokemon. I collected as many trading cards as I could, watched every episode of the American dub, and of course collected all of the games. Each one brought me endless adventures as I manufactured small pokemon armies and learned everything I could about each pokemon I encountered. My bookshelf was stuffed with all kinds of reference guides, Nintendo power articles, and cheat code manuals to almost every game I owned.
However, probably my favorite kinds of pokemon games were ones that deviated from the normal formula, such as Pokemon Snap or the stadium games. Of any game in the franchise, my favorite hands-down was Pokemon Stadium for the N64. Not only were there spectacular battle mechanics in full-fledged 3d graphics, but there were all kinds of extra touches to it. Out of all the bonus features, my favorite was minigame mode.
I still remember all the fun times I had playing those minigames with my sister and friends, along with all the great laughs and fun we shared then. But those experiences became but memories when I sold most of my games for college tuition.
Sadly, I ended up dropping out of college, putting the kibosh on those efforts to begin with. After a about a year of job-hunting, I was able to scrounge up a decent paying job and earn a solid living.
But there was still those nostalgic memories I wanted to relive. After a quick search online, I was able to find a mint-condition Pokemon Stadium cartridge on eBay. After five days of strong anticipation, I finally had reunited with one of my most cherished childhood memories: my favorite game for my favorite console.
With intense excitement running through me, I placed the game into the N64 while dressed in my homemade Pikachu outfit and pressed start. It showed the N64 as it normally would, but something seemed...off. Rather than Pikachu cheerfully say "Pika!" upon the logo's appearance, it sounded as if it yelled "PIKA!!!" in pain, similar to when you KO Pikachu in Super Smash Bros by hitting him into the sky a la Team Rocket. I chalked up the change the time distance between my last play and start as the cutscene began.
From that point on, everything was normal. The opening screen, menu, and city selection screen looked perfectly normal. I decided to relish in the minigames before doing any battles. But that was when things got weird.
Rather than say "Kids Club" the option instead read out "The Playing Field", something slightly more intimidating and mysterious than my previous recollection. I decided to let that fly as well and presumed.
I decided that the funniest game would be the first to be played: the clefairy memory game.
Once the game started, I'd noticed something was different about this game then what I'd played. The clefairies seemed nervous, almost fearful in contrast to their usually upbeat depiction. The teacher also had this darker, mean-looking demeanor. The commands to memorize came with no introduction, and the vanished with simply "Do it." Written on the board. The music started, my clefairy hitting the notes perfectly. The others didn't do as well.
However, instead of a toy hammer hitting them, a real metal sledgehammer appeared and hit them each time they missed a note. It sounded like an actual impact of metal against skull, with blood seeping from their heads. They would scream in pain, and each scream sounded strangely realistic; almost as if something in the TV was making that noise. Despite this, I somehow managed to play through the rest of the game. The clefairies became more bruised and beaten as the game progressed, with tears and blood disfiguring their appearances more and more. Upon losing their HP, they'd lie motionless on the ground, a puddle of blood growing around them. I'd won, but the Clefairy I played as broke down, sobbing over the death of her fellow pokemon. Despite the horrifying image, it played the victory tune with the "1P wins" title appearing.
I was naturally shocked at what I'd just witnessed. However, I played two more times to make sure this was a real game. Sure enough, the only difference after the first match were which of the clefairies won.
I began to realize I might have come across some grotesque mod cartridge. I decided to play the Pikachu/voltorb game to see what would happen.
Like the clefairy game, the pikachus and voltorbs looked incredibly scared of some sort of impending event.
The game began with me racing to first due to my strong button-mashing skills. In but second's I had won...but would soon regret it.
The lightning built up in the lightning rod as it should have, but the pikachus and voltorb let out a scream in agony as the lightning hit them. Once it'd cleared, they were lying dead on the ground, their bodies charred into revolting blacks and brown. It didn't look cartoony or charcoal-like either, but with blisters and charred flesh. Like before, the music and title appeared.
I was shocked, but I moved on...trying to ration any possible lightheartedness out of this game. However, it only got worse.
The Lickitung game. They were eating putrid (and often toxic) items that would make them constantly throw up everything they'd eaten. There were red chunks and streaks in their vomit.
"1P wins!"
The Ratata game. They were walking across conveyor belts littered with broken glass and nails that were coated with blood. They would screech in pain as they ran, intensifying upon jumping.
"1P wins!"
The kakuna/metapod game. If any lost their HP, there would be a sickening crunch and they wouldn't de-flatten, reduced to a crude red stain on the ground.
"1P wins!"
Hell, the magikarp game. The button on the counter had sharp spikes pointing downward that would visible impale the poor fishes.
"1P wins!"
Every game featured some sort of gruesome twist on the old games I knew and loved. Each was worse than the last, and the pokemon seemed to become more fearful as the game went on...almost as if begging me to spare them.
In a grueling half-hour, I'd played every game. However, the screen went to colorful static after the last game was won, and the console shut down. I should have been thankful...but for some reason, for some reason...I turned it back on.
All there was was some text. No Pikachu sound, not N64 logo, just text.
"Are you content?"
A selection box appeared. Yes or no.
"No."
A pause.
"So you want to see more?"
Another yes or no.
"No."
.....
"Did you have fun?"
"No."
"Then why did you kill them?"
No selection. I looked around while horrified, hoping this was an elaborate prank.
I decided to do the crazy thing. Talk to my TV.
"I...I don't know."
There was a long pause, about thirty seconds.
"Then I have a new game for you to play. A mega game."
"M-Mega game?"
"After all you've played, you'll love it....."
.....
The Playing Field screen appeared in a flash, only one game visible. I hovered the cursor over that game. No title, instructions, or even pokemon appeared.
I hit start.
"Ready?" The text said.
Yes or no.
...
...Why the hell did I press yes?
"Very well then. It's time to play a new game..."
...
"DON'T DIE."
The screen went black, leaving my bedroom in total darkness. Even the light on the N64 went out.
I navigated through the darkness to examine the TV. It was off...but the game console was still warm, as if it was still on.
Then...
I heard something. I heard a rattling noise come from the wooden casing the television was perched on. I reached out to touch the TV, it was vibrating. The screen flashed on, the brightest static possible prompting me to jump back and shied my eyes. The TV was shaking to the point where it was completely noticeable.
After a cracking noise, the screen exploded into thousands of pieces as a cornucopia of tendril-like wires shot out and barely missed me as they implanted themselves into the wall.
"OH, FUCK THIS!!!" I screamed as I hightailed it for the door.
When I reached the first floor, I noticed that the house was shaking as if an earthquake was afoot. Vases and pictures were falling off of their perches and tables to shatter on the floor. I lunged for the front door and ran across the street that house's yard, looking on as the house behind me contorted and made splintering noises.
"SWEET VIRGIN MARY!!!" I screamed as I watched all this unfold.
The windows on the upper floor glowed brightly and began to resemble eyes. The entire lower floor grew a huge crack as it formed a mouth with sharp, massive teeth. And then the dirt and foundation around it began to swell as the house rose and revealed a massive 10-story robotic body. It looked to the skies and gave out a massive, ear-splitting primal scream that rocked the city and shattered windows for miles.
I'd managed to frantically hot-wire a limo nearby and took off as the monster-house-robot gave chase. I was speeding at 100 mph, and the abomination was gaining.
"I ONLY WANTED TO PLAY WITH SOME POKEMANS!!!" I screamed to my aggressor.
The monster had managed to reach me and wrapped its hand around the limo. It spun me around like the iron giant and let go, sending me sailing over the city.
I was screaming at the top of my lungs as I watched the city beneath me roll by. Heck, I'd probably be on the opposite side upon landing.
I clenched my eyes shut as hard as I could and wrapped my arms around my head as I neared the ground. It was followed by the loudest smash I had ever heard in my life.
There was nothing visible in the windshield due to the massive dust cloud before the limo. Coughing up dust and debris, I tumbled out of the inverted limo and onto the floor of whatever structure I'd made a unique entrance to.
I could hear other people coughing. As the dust settled, I realized I'd crashed into a pillow fight of some sort of super model slumber party in the penthouse of a hotel.
There were about twelve girls there. The closest one looked at me with rage.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE, YOU PERVERT?" She screeched.
"YOU ALL HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE! WE'LL ALL DIE IF WE DON'T!"
"LIAR! EAT THIS!" Another one nearby said. She threw a glass of water at me.
Then the other girls ganged up on me and began slamming me with their pillows, inflicting a surprising amount of pain on me.
"STOP IT!!! YOU'RE GOING TO DOOM US ALL!!!" I begged.
"Too late for that. EAT THIS!!!"
I looked up to see one of them aiming an armed bazooka at me. I screamed and ran out of that room.
I ran down the hallway in the opposite direction of the room. The supermodel with the bazooka jumped out of it and aimed me down from her point.
"SAY GOODBYE!" She screamed out just as I reached a dead end.
However, the wall behind her smashed to pieces as a massive robot-hand reached through and grabbed her. She screamed as she was lifted out, dropping the bazooka.
I ran to the hole in the wall to see the monster climbing the hotel as if it was king kong, the girl screaming in its hand.
I armed myself with the rocket launcher and strapped it to my back.
"HEY, OVER HERE!!!" I screamed to the monster. In noticed me and reached out to grab me in the same hand the model was in.
It climbed to the top of the building, flailing us about as bi-planes from the 1930s tried to slay the beast.
"STAY CALM! I'VE GOT AN IDEA!!!" I screamed to the girl.
"OKAY!"
I aimed the weapon at the monster's other shoulder. With a loud PFFT, te rocket sailed through the air and made contact. It was blown to pieces, shocking the monster.
It swayed off of the edge of the building and grabbed on to the floor five stories from the top. We could make a break for it.
"RUN!!! I'LL HOLD IT OFF!!!"
"BUT YOU'LL NEVER MAKE IT!!!" She responded.
"I SAID GO!!!"
She looked up at the floor within reach, back to me, then regrettably ran off.
"Alright, Sean Turner wants to battle..." I said as I managed to jump onto the back of its hand. I aimed the bazooka right towards its mouth.
"SEAN TURNER USED EXPLOSION!!!"
The rocket sailed into its mouth. The ensuing explosion destroyed any remnant on it of having a head, followed by a massive fireball of blue flame. It formed into a demonic face and screeched for a few second before vanishing.
Then the floor became an incline as the monster's body descended. I ran with all my stride as the floor slid away from the rest of the hall, leaping in time to latch onto the edge. Behind me, a symphony of crashing noises gave way as the monster's demise was validated.
I climbed onto the edge, laying on my back and gasping for air. I only saw the ceiling at first, but it was suddenly occupied by the face of the girl who was only a minute ago trying to kill me.
"You...you saved us all."
"...yeah. I did."
Upon that phrase, her face started to change. What was once a face of wonder and astonishment became a look of gratefulness, attraction...and a hint of passion.
She leaned over me till she was only a few inches from my face.
I turned my head to its side.
She got closer to my ear. She started to whisper.
"Why are you wearing a Pikachu suit?"
Category:Satire
Category:Pokemon
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Stuff Blowing Up
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Trollpasta