nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Shogun Island

Trainer Samurai SpongeBob is waxing Gary when the local mailman shows up at SpongeBob's house and hands him a videotape delivery. SpongeBob plays the tape on his TV, which states that he has been recieved to be "Shogun" and tells him to attend to Iwo Jima to be crowned.
SpongeBob is about to leave when he encounters Ronin Sandy, to whom he happily explains that he is the going to be shogun. Sandy is suspicious of this, so she accompanies SpongeBob on the boat ride. The boat stops at Shogun Island, where the "Supreme Shogun" Hirohito, greets SpongeBob but ignores Sandy. SpongeBob, to prove himself, asks to fight Hirohito's best warrior. Three warriors arrive, and when they fight SpongeBob, they pretend to get hurt and soon pretend to be defeated.
Sandy notices this, adding to her suspicion. SpongeBob is officially crowned a "Shogun" and sits on his throne and requests Sandy to sit beside him in a lounge chair. Sandy leaves when SpongeBob becomes arrogantly proud and accuses her of being jealous of him. After she leaves, SpongeBob is suddenly locked into his throne. Just as the water is up to Sandy's head (she was walking into the water about to leave), she hears SpongeBob's cries for help, and reluctantly goes back to save him.
Sandy fights through Hirohito's Castle, fighting an opponent on each floor with an unusual "power" (there are three floors that Sandy has to get through and for all of them, she had to avoid being tickled, kissed and smelling the filth of Hirohito's COs by using jelly filled donuts, hair dryer and fresh air dome in her helmet) until she crashes through the top floor's entry way; the trapdoor where SpongeBob is being held hostage by Hirohito. Hirohito reveals that he is a debt collector, the island was originally for battle royale, and will not let SpongeBob go until he agrees to buy a debt on the island, while also increasing his equity. He then tells SpongeBob he is not shogun as it was just a scam. SpongeBob shouts in horror and Sandy want to fight Hirohito. Hirohito rips off his uniform to expose him naked after a brief muscle growth (Hirohito's extra muscles were in his eyebrows), and so they begin fighting by charging at each other but they miss and Sandy kill Hirohito by beheading, chop his torso halves and amputated his limbs. She frees SpongeBob. As they leave the island, SpongeBob apologizes to Sandy for acting like a jerk to her and thanks her for saving him from buying debt, and which she forgives him and tells him that's what friends are for. Then SpongeBob asked if he's not into shogunate anymore, Sandy said "Fuck off". Then she explains to him about debt and royale as the boat leaves shore.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Bad Fanfiction
Category:SpongeBob
Category:Pointless Violence
Shopping

Every time you go shopping, you share intimate details about your consumption patterns with retailers. And many of those retailers are studying those details to figure out what you like, what you need, and which coupons are most likely to make you happy. One of them has figured out how to data-mine its way into your womb, to figure out whether you have a baby on the way long before you need to start buying diapers.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Shopping Cart Theory

The shopping cart is the ultimate litmus test for whether a person is capable of self-governing.
To return the shopping cart is an easy, convenient task and one which we all recognize as the correct, appropriate thing to do. To return the shopping cart is objectively right. There are no situations other than dire emergencies in which a person is not able to return their cart. Simultaneously, it is not illegal to abandon your shopping cart. Therefore the shopping cart presents itself as the apex example of whether a person will do what is right without being forced to do it. No one will punish you for not returning the shopping cart, no one will fine you or kill you for not returning the shopping cart, you gain nothing by returning the shopping cart. You must return the shopping cart out of the goodness of your own heart. You must return the shopping cart because it is the right thing to do. Because it is correct.
A person who is unable to do this is no better than an animal, an absolute savage who can only be made to do what is right by threatening them with a law and the force that stands behind it.
The Shopping Cart is what determines whether a person is a good or bad member of society.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:THERY
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Memes
Category:Shortpasta
Shower Curtain

You have to pee.
You go to the bathroom.
You notice a shadow behind the curtain in the shower.
You hear a cackle, sort of like a clown.
You pull open the shower curtain.
Nothing is there.
You realize the shadow is from behind you.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Shower Horror

Prologue
It all started out as a normal Thursday night. I hopped into the shower, and allowed the hot water to envelope me. As I washed myself, i kept feeling the slightest urge to look into the mirror. I don't know how i resisted it, for the urge kept getting stronger, and stronger, AND STRONGER! I turned off the faucet, and exited the shower, towel in hand. I stopped in front of the mirror. "Everything looks normal." I thought to myself. I chuckled, thinking about how stupid I was acting. What did I expect to find? A fucking demon staring back at me? I laughed a second time, and dried my face in my blue towel. When I looked back up at the mirror, it was still my face. But something was off. I couldn't put my finger on it, but I knew something was different. Then i realized it. And the second I did, I wished I didn't. I had no eyes. I had no god damn eyes. OH MY GOD, I HAVE NO MOTHERFUCKING EYES!!!! Black pits stared back into my soul, growing ever deeper as they swallowed me whole. I plunged into eternal darkness, trying to scream but no sound was made. Suddenly, I hit hard, solid ground. I heard the bloodcurdling sound of a bone snapping. I tried to stand, and even though I was in tremendous pain, I could move perfectly, if only just a slight limp. I was surprised, but I continued. I walked through a dark corridor, barely able to see two feet ahead of me. I felt so cold. It was as if it was winter in fucking Antarctica. I will always remember that chill.
Epilogue
I found a part of myself there in that dark world. There are many of us here in it. I am happy now. It is eternal bliss, with every ripped throat and slashed chest, my bloodlust grows stronger. I long for that day that I finally bring an imperfect human into our perfect world. Actually, I figure that day is today. For about now, a child, named Dylan, is stepping out of his shower, and his urge to look into the mirror is growing. I just can't wait to swallow him with my empty eyes.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Demins and Debbils
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Shrek's Best Christmas

Once upon a time, in the land of Duloc, there lived a boy whose name was Shrek.
Shrek was a good little boy and he always gobbled his vegetables right up!
It was Christmas eve and Shrek was so excited that he shit his stupid pants. When he went to bed he probably smelled like poop and pee.
Shrek is such a fucking loser.
He went to sleep and dreamed about Ganja plants.
He woke up at 4:20 AM because he had made a shit ton of pee on his bed because he is so fucking dumb.
He made more pee on his pillows then hopped out of bed to see if Santa was still chilling out at his house.
When Shrek went downstairs he saw Santa, and just stared at him. Like he had aspergers or something.
Santa dropped trou, and said:
"Shrek, you are such a retard, dude."
And then ripped ass all over Shrek's living room.
Shrek threw up and passed out because he was so stoned.
Santa stole the rest of Shrek's dank. And blew some more ass in Shrek's face.
The end.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shrek
Category:Holidays
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:SMOKE WEED ERRYDAY
Category:Shortpasta
Shrek's Day of Shrekoning

Now this is a story all about an ogre named Shrek and I'd like to take a minute, so just sit right there - I'll tell you how his life got flipped upside-down.
In a swamp Shrek was born and raised, on an overgrown playground was where he spent most of his days, hanging out with his friends and trying to look cool while playing basketball outside of school. When a couple of guys who were government men started dumping radioactive waste in his swamp, he got horribly mutated into a creature people began to call an "ogre". His people were eventually wiped out in a top secret government purge that nobody knew about and he was alone in the swamps away from a society that he knew would reject him. Over the years, Shrek went insane and started speaking with an Irish accent. One day a weird loser traveler in the swamps met Shrek and later made a movie about him.
Years later, Shrek became an internet meme and some dumbass even went into the swamp to see if Shrek was real. He got his wallet stolen by the woman from the Popeye's commercials who killed him and stole his laptop too, who was later killed by Shrek, who stole the laptop and used it to go on the interwebs where he found out that he was an internet meme.
Shrek later bought a suit and went into civilization and sued the creator of the movie. He won millions of dollars and became a famous rich person in the city, but the good times didn't last forever, as Shrek became addicted to cocaine and later almost died of drug ogredose. He decided to turn his life back around and moved back to the swamps to be one with nature until he died a slow death of type 4 diabetes like some hippie shit like that.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shrek
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air
Category:Shortpasta
ShrekExtraLargeDong.exe

I was a huge ass Shrek fan in the world. But not anyone because of this dreckin game.
So 1 day I went to da flea market and than a old man who was wearing a Shrek t-shirt, and he give me a game called ShrekExtraLargeDong.exe. He said you can have the game for free.
I poop onions with joy. So I brought the game at home and leave.
And then I heard a spooky voice. He said, Shrek is love, Shrek is life. I ignore it and went to my room. I insert da game on my GameCube and turn it on. Instead of the GameCube logo, It said Shrektendo OnionCube. Maybe it was just a glitch. I created a new file and start playing.
When the first level starts, It looked different. Shrek had hyper realistic eyes. I start running around and I found the mirror guy dead. And then Shrek fucks the mirror guy. I was like dafuq? And than I was send to the forest level. It showed a cutscene where Shrek kills Little red ridding hood with a knife. And he faps and cums onions at her.
I was send to Mother Goose Land and the same thing happens. Shrek kills Humpty Dumpty
with a hammer. This time Shrek eats him.
I was send to the final level which is Merlin's tower. I visit the tower and it showed a old man from the flea market hanged Merlin with a hyper realistic rope. I was scared shrekless. And then Shrek sayed. Hey now, you're a deadstar, get your blood on, go die. And then a Skeleton Shrek like popped out and kill me.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shrek
Category:Vidya games
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:Crappy ms paint drawings
Category:Shortpasta
Category:File Extensions
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:Im died
Shrek 2: Bootleg Tape

I'm pretty sure you know about the Shrek sequel "Shrek 2". If not, then ya a idiot. Just kidding, no bad thoughts it's not meant to be taken seriously, but anyways. I was looking in my garage sale for tapes of nostalgia when I came across a bootleg tape of Shrek 2. Like any other curious guy, I took the tape and inserted it into my old VCR player. 
There was a message saying: "Test film 2002." What!! A test movie? I thought I was going to watch the final version of the film from 2004! Oh well, curiosity killed my previous thought, so I watched. It started out with Shrek, Donkey and Fiona returning to their swamp after the wedding party instead of them going on a honeymoon. 
Donkey is sent to clean up the mess outside by Shrek because he and Fiona are having some private time. This is pretty similar to the final version. Donkey cleans the mess with a broom on his hind legs (whoa that's rare to see Donkey on his hind legs). Donkey finishes the job in 4 minutes before coming to Shrek's house and knocking on his door with his hoofs. 
"What is it, Donkey?" Shrek questioned. "I cleaned the mess up." Donkey answers. "Are you sure?" Shrek replied. "Yes." Donkey replied. Shrek told Donkey to come in, then Donkey saw Fiona's babies, but before I could see Donkey's reaction, the screen froze. It suddenly cut to a image of Shrek, Donkey and Fiona suffering in jail as scary music played in the background. 
A message was on top that says: "This is a pirated copy of the original film of Shrek 2. Please report this stolen film immediately!!!" Then I heard a voice that repeated the word "criminal". Each time the word "criminal" is heard, the three main characters start to dehydrate or become old. The screen would get more shadowy and darker, and the voice would get louder until the very end. Fast forward to the very end, the main characters have turned into bones, the voice is loud and the screen is almost overtaken by the darkness. I shut down the VCR player just in case of any kind of reason. I destroyed the tape with a hammer and threw it into the trash can. Now I am never forgetting this mind blowing experience I just had. If something like this happens to you, let me know.....
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Shrek
Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Shrek 5: The Shrekoning

Me and my friend were at my friend's house, and we were choosing a movie. I saw in the movie collection movies I liked. I then got to the S sections. I saw all the Shrek movies there, but I noticed. There was one extra. It said Shrek 5: The Shrekoning.
The first thing odd about it was that the cover didn't have Donkey, Fiona, Puss or anyone. It was just a picture of Shrek roaring. The picture of Shrek roaring looked like it was glued to a white piece of paper. The other odd thing was that the name "Shrek 5: The Shrekoning" was written in permanent marker.
I asked where my friend got the DVD. He told me he didn't know. Since we are both huge Shrek fans, we chose to watch it. At first, it started with the title card. It said "Shrek 5: The Shrekoning" in CGI. Then, an axe cut the title in half. The green in the title turned red. That made me jump.
Next, the camera zoomed out. It showed Shrek holding an axe with blood on it. I was surprised that I saw blood in a Shrek movie, but the original Shrek had Shrek get shot with an arrow, so I wasn't that shocked. Shrek walked to a village and kept slicing people in half with an axe. The blood in the scene looked really realistic.
People tried to grab torches and pitchforks, but Shrek chopped off their heads with axes. Shrek went near one person and kept swinging his axe at him. His victim wasn't onscreen, but blood was splattering every time he swung. Then, Shrek grabbed a flamethrower and said "AH WEE GON HAF A WEE TAH HAF A FOON TEIM LADS" and turned the flamethrower on, and it burned people. I would have found this funny because of the one liner Shrek said, but that was pretty brutal. Next, because of the flamethrower, the village Shrek entered, was burning down. Shrek left the village while it was burning.
The next night in the movie, people came to Shrek's swamp with pitchforks and torches. Shrek opened the door with a tommy gun and said "This is my swamp!" Shrek shot people with the tommy gun, and then threw onions at the people that were still alive. The onions exploded. There was a green gas all around. Everyone was dead except Shrek. The dead people had bullet holes and some looked like they died of carbon monoxide. It was probably caused by the onions. Shrek looked at the camera and said "You're next..." And then punched the screen. The screen blacked out and I took out the disc. I put it back in the case. My friend was highly disturbed by it.
So my theory about it is this: I think that this takes place before the first Shrek. It's a prequel. The village people in Shrek 1 don't hate Shrek because he's an ogre. It's because he murdered many villagers and burned the village down, and that made everyone afraid of ogres.
Unlike most people, I didn't destroy the copy. My friend and I copied Shrek 5 onto another disc and sold the copy on eBay saying it was Shrek 1 to troll people. If you see Shrek 5: The Shrekoning, it's worth watching to get a good laugh.
Part two here
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:YOU'RE NEXT
Category:Stuff Blowing Up
Category:Shrek
Shrek 666

I was an employee at Shrek Animations, when I saw something silver roll behind the desk. I picked it up, and it was a blank disc with "Shrek 666" written in black sharpie, I put it into the Computer Tower's Disc Bay (this was in 2003). It had the same intro as "Shrek 1", but it was in Sepia and Puppe by Rammstein was playing, I found this strange, since Puppe wasn't supposed to come out for over a decade. Then my Co-worker, Shane, said, "Time Traveller, your existence is a threat to the Time-Space Continuum". "H-how did you know I'm a time traveller?" I asked. "You know of the existence of a song that is not coming out for over a decade." He said, and raised a black handgun to my face, "wait! if you know what Puppe is, that means you're also a time tra-" He pulled the trigger, and I was erased from existence. He then pointed the gun to his temple, and pulled it, and was erased from existence, since he, too, was a time traveller.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Shrek
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Rocks Fall, Everybody Dies
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Shrek Is Hate

>be me
>be 19
>made a really NSFW pasta about Shrek
>the next day later
>it gets deleted by Wikia Staff
>I was sad and crying
>Until, I felt a warmth on my back
>it was the mighty Ogrelord's hand, it was SHREK!
>He said "it's all ogre now."
>then he vanished into thin air
>Shrek is right
>it is all ogre now
>I can't believe the one and only mighty ogrelord has betrayed me
>he didn't fill my butt with his love or anything, he just left me here to suffer
>Shrek is hate I say,
>Shrek comes back
>"I got'a present for ya, you piece of shit!"
>Shrek gives me coal, and slaps my face
>Shrek leaves
>I cannot live anymore knowing that my ogrelord hates me
>so I killed myself
>Shrek is hate, Shrek is death.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shrek
Category:Suicide
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Shrek Is Ludd, Shrek is Game

>I was only nineteen muthafuckin years oldschool I loved shrek so much, I had all tha loot n' pornos
>I pray ta shrek every last muthafuckin night before bed thankin his ass fo' tha game I've been given. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. 
>Shrek is ludd I say, Shrek is game 
>My fuckin daddy overhears me n' calls me a playa 
>I knew da thug was just jealouz of mah devotion fo' Shrek 
>I called his ass a playaaaaaa 
>Dude slaps me n' sendz me ta chill like a pimp 
>Im bustin up like a biatch now, n' mah grill hurts 
>I lay up in bed n' its straight-up cold 
>A warmth is movin towardz mah dirty ass. 
>I feel suttin' bust a nut on me 
>It be shrek 
>I be so aiiight 
>Dude whispers up in ta ear "this is mah swamp 
>Dude grabs me wit his bangin ogre handz n' puts me on mah handz n' knees 
>I be locked n loaded 
>I spread mah ass cheeks fo' Shrek 
>Dude penetrates mah butthole 
>It hurts so much but I do it fo' Shrek 
>I can feel mah booty tearin as mah eyes start ta wata 
>I push against his wild lil' force 
>I wanna please Shrek 
>Dude roars a mighty roar as he fills mah booty wit his fuckin ludd 
>My fuckin daddy strutts up in 
>Shrek looks his ass straight up in tha eye n' say "It all ogre now" 
>Shrek leaves all up in mah window
Shrek is ludd Shrek is game.
Category:Shrek
Category:Bad Fanfiction
Category:Ghetto Talk
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Shortpasta
Shrek Is Not Drek

It was Saturday. The day after I had finished praying to my ogrelord. I offered him a bouquet of onions. But it seems he was not appeased as my family was poor and we could not afford much. Forgive me for I have sinned. I went 3 hours without eating onions, but instead I had a cake. I had broken the sin of worshiping a false idol. I knew I would be punished. It all started that Monday. I saw a cute ogirl, she was very kawaii. I went up to say hello. Her breath smelt of onions. It was amazing. Her boobs were hyperealistic like Lara Croft's in Tomb Raider on PS1. She had hair like Fiona, above and below. We went into a flower shop and I bought her onions. Thankfully, she was pleased with my offerings and she agreed to let me insert my onion head inside her mouth. We made way back to my swamp. She got ready to receive. I inserted my mushroom tip. I start screaming in sweet pleasure. I shout "Shrek, Shrek, Shrek, Dreeeeeeeek!". She stopped. She sunk her teeth into it, hyperrealistc blood sprays out and spells on the wall: "Shrek is not Drek". All of a sudden Shrek flies out of my anus hole. He called me a bad Farquaad. Hyperrealistic blood gushes out of my mouth. Then I bled from my empty eye sockets and Shrek's dinkah pokes out of my mouth. And his third and second out my nose, one in each nostril. I died. He carried my ogirl away and had vicious and vigorous ogre love. The last thing I saw was Shrek's hyperrealistic erect mighty ogre penis ejaculating in my face to show his dominance. "I am love, I am life and it won't be ogre soon laddeh".
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:Im died
Category:Shrek
Category:Crappy ms paint drawings
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:NSFW
Category:Shortpasta
Shrek Review

My father took me to watch Shrek, then he left me in the car park and drove away so Mike Myers adopted me, as he was watching Shrek too. Shrek was created by Rick Sanchez from Rick and Morty. So, I plotted the death of Rick Sanchez. Mickey Mouse Kidnapped me, and told me he wanted to help kill Mr. Sanchez. I went back home, and started watching Breaking Bad, so I want to sell meth now. 20 years later, I got let out of prison because I threw a pizza on the roof, so they realise that I was making a Breaking Bad reference. I am fully bald now so, I went to MacDonald's, and got a Big Mac while eating, a shady man gave me a Bible, so I read it. "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth." I stopped reading it, because it was boring, and I wanted to plan the death of Rick Sanchez, but it got boring so I started to watch Get Schwifty the Movie. But I forgot I hate Rick Sanchez, so I watched a bootleg version of Get Schwifty the Movie. So, it was a bad movie, so I wasted a hour of my life. Rick Sanchez showed up at my doorstep, and it went dark, and I woke up in a warehouse, and Rick Sanchez called me son. Shrek walked though the door, and ate Rick Sanchez, and Mike Myers shot Shrek. I asked Mike Myers why, and he said "Truth is the game was rigged from the start", and he pulled the trigger. And I woke up in Doc Mitchell house, and he said "You're awake how about that".
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Shrek
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta