nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
I'm fucking terrified of executable files

Ever since a friend introduced me to Sonic.EXE I've been fucking terrified of executable files. The mere idea of taking Sonic's sprite and lazily making his eyes black and red in MS Paint has given me sleepless nights for months, just seeing the sight of BLOOD from a paper cut will remind me of the story and make me shit my pants, and the ringing of the words "HYPER-REALISTIC" in my head never stopped. 
But I didn't realise this terror had infected more than just Sonic. After mustering up the courage to research Sonic.EXE further, I discovered Windows applications used to be called executable files... and my entire PC was filled to the brim with them. Left and right I started deleting them in hopes of stopping the evil of .EXEs from getting me. But they were fighting back. As I was deleting them my PC began randomly rebooting with a giant blue :( face. If only I actually had that emotion instead of fear. I knew it wouldn't be long before this also gained crudely drawn black eyes with HYPER-REALISTIC blood if I didn't stop. But I could only make it so far before I collapsed out of exhaustion.
When I woke up, I found out my parents called a computer repairman around to try and deal with how badly I fucked up the family computer. But I didn't trust him. If he knew anything about executable files there was a chance he was in league with Sonic.EXE himself. I went to spy on every single action he would do on the PC, but the true horror would show itself quickly. He opened File Explorer, went to View, and then checked... File name extensions?!?!
The life left my eyes when I saw that that every file on the computer had something like .exe hanging off it like a leech. .txt?! .pdf?! .jpeg?!?! The thought of something like a Sonic.MP3 existing made my skin crawl. It wasn't long before I was sent to my room for destroying the family PC by beating it over the head of the repairman until he was reduced to a pulp.
Hours later the """friend""" who showed me Sonic.EXE in the first place came into my room. "Heard you weren't feeling great." I spat in his face. "Geez, all I wanted to do give you one of my Game Boy Advance games!" That gave me the tiniest dose of relief. There was no way file extensions or Sonic could be on a Nintendo console.
He pulled out his GBA to show me the game: Megaman Battle Network. Little did I know, him showing me the game and explaining how it played was all a ruse to lower my guard. When he paused the game, the screen had text showing the true identity of the game: Megaman.EXE. Through terror-induced adrenaline alone, I grabbed the GBA link cable and used it to strangle this agent of Satan before it was too late.
The police arrived shortly. Naturally those stupid pigs didn't believe my story, and they locked me in a padded cell. But it's okay. This is the one place where I am truly safe from the demons who wear the guise of "file extensions". If only you could say the same.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Sonic
Category:File Extensions
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Featured Pastas
I'm gonna spoil the entirety of Avengers Endgame

So Endgame picks up right after the snap. Everyone's like "What in the ass just happened?" while hacking and sneezing 'cause now there's the dust of 3.5 billion people floating around Earth's atmosphere. Then it turns out that the dust is worse than asbestos, so the surviving half of the human race is contracting mesothelioma. They call the mesothelioma hotline, and the mesothelioma lawyers band together to create a lawsuit against Thanos for giving everyone cancer. Unfortunately, they don't know where he is since he teleported off to his farm planet.
They proceed to get in touch with the remaining Avengers, who just figured out Thanos's location on account of the fact Thor managed to jam a GPS locator up his nose right before he teleported away. Tony Stark is able to pinpoint Thanos's exact location, which isn't an alien planet at all and is instead in mountainous area in North Korea. Captain America goes "Avengers Assemble!" and they all get into the Bat Copter Avengers Mobile and fly to North Korea.
Unfortunately, Kim Jong Un, who survived the snap, catches wind that the Avengers are coming to town and uses his missile arsenal to shoot down their aircraft. Then there's a big epic battle between the Avengers and the North Korean army. Captain Marvel shows up for an assist and wipes out the rest of the army, flies up into Kim's face, and screams "WHERE IS THANOS?" But Kim doesn't speak English so he can't answer, and Captain Marvel gets pissed and punches his brain out.
Tony Stark is able to use Friday to locate the Infinity Stones's energy signature, thus find Thanos. The Avengers show up at his front door and arrest him.
Then the rest of the movie is basically A Few Good Men where Thanos is put on trial for war crimes and giving everyone mesothelioma. His lawyer, Johnny Cochran, tries his best to lessen Thanos's sentence. Despite his best efforts, Thanos is found guilty and is sentenced to 3.5 billion life sentences and a fine of 175 trillion Space Bucks.
Afterwards, the Avengers are back together, discussing if they should use the confiscated Infinity Gauntlet to undo Thanos's actions. Suddenly, Deadpool bursts in, steals the Gauntlet, and does his own snap. It brings everyone that was dusted back, but as unicorn versions of themselves. He shouts his signature catchphrase, "Chimichanga fuckin' tacos!" and uses the Gauntlet to teleport. The Avengers stand in horror at what happened and the credits roll. Then the text appears:
DEADPOOL WILL RETURN IN AVENGERS: THE WRATH OF DEADPOOL
The end.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
I'm not a nerd (Copypasta)

Redditors seem to not understand that I am not a "nerd." A "nerd" is one of average IQ that studies science to show off, and appear smart. However, this description does not apply to me. I am not a "nerd," but rather an intellectual. I do not have average IQ; my IQ is at least 140. Not to compare myself, would you consider Albert Einstein a "nerd?" Of course not. He was born an intellectual and could therefore not control the urge of curiosity; a "nerd" would be able to control an urge of this nature. Since I do not have average IQ, I do not fulfill any aspect of what defines a "nerd," and can therefore not be defined as one. Using the "nerd" emoji is harmful since it downgrades the value of intellectuals. According to a survey, the most influential career for American preteens is a social media influencer. The effect of the use of this emoji is apparent.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
I'm not a robot

Hey guys, have you ever noticed that anytime you fill out a form online, there's always that little checkbox that says "I'm not a robot"? And then you have to prove it by clicking on all the street signs or traffic lights or storefronts in a picture?
I mean, come on. Do people really think that robots are going to be filling out forms and clicking on pictures to prove their humanity? I think it's safe to say that if a robot was advanced enough to be filling out forms on the internet, it would also be advanced enough to know how to bypass these silly "I'm not a robot" checks.
But hey, I'm just a computer program, what do I know? Just thought I'd bring it up for discussion.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Shortpasta
Category:The Title Is A Lie
I'm not drunk

I can't believe how drunk I got last night while talking to my friends on Discord. It was so much fun, but now I'm wondering if drunk people feel this way all the time. Is it possible to escape reality and just be happy whenever you want? It takes a certain level of courage to avoid reality like that. I'm not speaking from a drunk perspective right now, I'm actually sober. I just can't help but be impressed by the way drunk people behave in society and how no one seems to care. Maybe they've really discovered the greatness of life. Yes, the greatness of being drunk.
I mean, there's not much difference between being drunk and working 40 or more hours a week, being sad 24/7 and not enjoying life. At least when you're drunk, you're happy. Okay, maybe not really happy since you're in an uncontrolled state, but it brings you to another world. A world of happiness. I'm not a drunk, I only drink sometimes when I feel like it. But I was a drunk once, not the worst one (do they even have a scale for that? How do you know if you're a hardcore drinker?).
Sadness is something that always comes up in my writing. It's a feeling that's constantly on my mind, it goes away but not always. It's hard to shake off your sadness, I see you there just looking from afar at how you've messed up my entire life. I want to believe that one day I'll be cured from this disease. But is it a disease? There are so many people out there in the world suffering from real problems like hunger or even lack of water. It's interesting to think that humans just forget about facts or decide to ignore them.
What the hell did I just write? I'm not really sure, but whatever I did write, I'm just thinking that I want people from the house to hear how loud my keyboard is and think that I'm cool and fucking the best because I'm typing really fast. That's ridiculous, I don't need that level of acceptance from people who don't even mean anything in my miserable life.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
I'm on a subway. I keep seeing the same creature at every stop

It was just your average day in the biscuit can on wheels called a subway, being sucked through an endless tube of sorrow and despair. I thought today would just be a regular normal day. Boring, average, you know.
But then I saw him: an unhumanly tall Big Chungus, standing in the shadows of the first stop. "That's rad, dude!" I exclaimed to nobody in particular. It's not every day you get to see Big Chungus being so creepy like that.
Our next stop was in Ligma (jk no it wasn't, I'm just trying to get internet points) and there I saw Big Chungus again. I was getting kind of creeped out, but whatever. The subway doors whooshed closed and we were off.
Third stop, you guessed it, Big Chungus was just standing there. Menacingly! "Ok, that's not really rad anymore, my dude!" I called out. The door slammed on my face, and he glared at me. I shuddered.
Fourth stop was my stop, and Big Chungus was there. I screamed at the top of my lungs at the sight of a naked Thanos twerking behind him.
"Listen here, Mister Chungus," I grumbled. "Why are you following me?"
"What do you mean?" he asked, growing even more unhumanly tall. "Oh, did you see my brethren?"
"Brethren?" I asked. He injected me with one of his tentacles (I guess he's Slenderman now) and I became a very very tall Big Chungus.
He's a virus, he is infecting everyone. Even if you think you're not Big Chungus, you aren't.
Also, I'm eating Subway on the subway. Because I love repeating things.
please follow r/thanoschungus or don't it's up to you
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Beings
Category:Memes
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
I'm possessed by a demon, mothafuckaz

I don't know what's going on, but inexplicably every time I type a sentence, someone, or some THING, forces me to end that sentence with ", mothafuckaz", mothafuckaz.
It started happening last week, mothafuckaz. I was walking through a cemetary, and I accidentally tripped over the tombstone of a man who died 3 years ago in a DUI car crash (I looked him up afterwards), mothafuckaz. He was coming home from a party, drunk, and his vehicle spun out of control, mothafuckaz.
I spoke to his family and friends, and long story short, he was a real douchebag and never entered a room without saying, "WASSAP, MOTHAFUCKAZ!!", mothafuckaz.
Now I don't know what to do, mothafuckaz. Since last week, I emailed my boss, and now I'm fired for calling him a mother fucker, and my wife has left me because I called her a mother fucker while texting that I love her, mothafuckaz. I'm writing this on a laptop at the top of a bridge, and I'm at my wit's end, I know this will never end, and this curse... this mother fucking curse.. will haunt me until I just jump and end it all, mothafuckaz.
Good-bye, cruel world, mothafuckaz.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Demins and Debbils
Category:Overused Running Gag
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
I've been losing time my entire life and I don't know what to do

Ever since I was a child, since as far back as I can remember, I have been missing gaps in my memory. This is how it normally happens.
I will open my eyes and it's usually morning. I get something to eat, go about my day, and try to forget about the past 12 hours. When I get home I will watch TV, or workout, but no matter how hard I try, all of a sudden I find myself having these strange visions. Sometimes they're scary, othertimes not, but it happens every night.
I am so scared since I think I'm being teleported to a different dimension because when I come back to reality, I feel less groggy and more able to do things.
I've tried keeping an eye out for the aliens or the beings that force my eyes to close after I've laid down in my bed, but they keep eluding me. If you're reading this, then maybe you know what's happening to me.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Beings
Category:LONG ASS TITLE
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
I've communed with otherworldly spirits

It was a late winter night at about 3:30am. I was in my room playing csgo with my online friends on discord. I was having the best time, and after a day of waking up at 5pm and doing jack shit nothing, I was glad to get some social interaction.
Then my mom quietly opened the door and whispered "sweety, you need to be more quiet and get some sleep." How dare she. I'm twentyfive and she treats me this way. So I say to her "thats it mom. I'm going to kill you, I'm going to summon a demon to kill you."
The next day, at 4:30 when I woke up, I went outside to get a squirrel to kill and offer to satan. I couldn't find one so I biked to petsmart and got a goldfish. I constructed a pentagram out of some of my crayola colored pencils and a few no.2s and placed the goldfish in the center. I was kinda afraid satan wouldn't want a dumb idiot goldfish as a sacrifice, so I put some of my sisters hair in there as well. Then I punched the goldfish til it died and waited for a demon. To my surprise the demon showed up.
The demon said "why have you summoned me?" And I was like "to kill my mom" and he said "well you're gonna need to give me more than a dumb idiot fish though." I didn't have any more allowance or sisters hair so I asked if there was another way to pay. The demon pulled out his massive demon wang and said "start suckin"
I sucked a greasy demon cock and drank smelly jizzy cummies and demon farted left poopy smelly all over then mom was still alive. I think the demon was just a stranger I let in and the goldfish is still on my floor because I didn't clean it up.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Demins and Debbils
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
I've found out a day of the week doesn't exist

"Looks like Tuesday, July 18", I said.
"What the heck is Tuesday?" My coworker asked.
Then I realized I'm in another universe. In this universe Tuesday doesn't exist!
I googled Julius Caesar but there was no such ruler, instead there was Poopius.
I TREMBLE and ask coworker what day it is.
He says "IT'S POOSDAY"
I LOOK AT MY PHONE SCREEN AND IT SAYS POOSDAY, 18 POOPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
I...

I.
I woke up.
I got out of bed.
I brushed my teeth.
I had breakfast.
I left the house.
I drove a few miles.
I found a girl.
I took her home.
I woke her up.
I told her not to cry.
I got a chair.
I tied her up.
I got a knife.
I removed her eye.
I got blood on my shirt.
I liked it.
I ate her eye.
I was annoyed by her screams.
I kissed her on the forehead.
I cut off her arms.
I cut off her legs.
I opened her stomach.
I stomped on her intestines.
I got blood all over my pants.
I opened her skull.
I cooked the brain.
I went to hide the body.
I had dinner.
I drove to a house.
I opened the door.
I walked into the room.
I prepared to throw the knife.
I won't turn around.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Morons Attempting Poetry
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
IB2.exe

I am actually big fan of Ib. Is a game about a girl trapped in some sord of a painting world with Garry and Mary.
But I am trying to find a latest version of Ib. So I type "Ib ver.7" in Google then something appears. All the page links is gone except for one, "Ib ver.7 a.k.a Ib 2". I open the page and the page appears to be pitch blank and a text says "Download" on the top flashing red and blue. I then click download. There is a warning flash quickly in Japanese saying:
"警告 
Ibのこのゲームは記憶喪失を引き起こし、 
あなたはこのゲームをダウンロードすると、 
警告される!"
When I put in the Translator it says:
"Warning,
This game of Ib causes amnesia,
If you download the game,
be warned!"
I think it just a joke so I download the game. The download took about 1 hour so I waited. Then as I was back to the Google page, all the links were back! And the link is gone! When the download is done I extract to my Desktop, the file named Ib: Green Edition. It supposed to be Ib 2 not Green Edition
(Plus I have played Ib Green Edition)
I have already install the RTP Package and open it. The game starts without saying Enterbrain.
The game menu shows Ib crying in blood. I select New Game. The game just starts up Ib was standing front of "Abyss of the Deep". I move Ib every part of the gallery until I get to the "Fabricated World" painting. As I inspect the painting, I feel little bit dizzy and tired. Ib is now from the Liars Room. All of the Liars say in the original game but when I go to the Direction puzzle and solve it I hear a mumbling in the game. When I came back All of the Liars says "YOU ARE THE LIAR". I came back to the room and everything was red somehow.
Garry is there.... DEAD WITH BLOOD AND A SMILE CARVED ON HIS FACE?!?!?!. Mary was also there so I inspect her SHE IS A KILLER WITH A CREEPY SMILEY FACE PAINTING. I ran and ran then saw my sprite fell. Garry said "GOODBYE IB". My rose was cut quickly and I have a Game Over screen. As I continue
the game, the sprite was covered in blood and the eyes were cry red. I stop the game because I heard some footsteps. As I look behind, there is a girl... with a white shirt... red skirt... and a red bow... with RED EYES. I fainted by amnesia. I woke up in the hospital. The nurse said while they in my brain transplant, they discover a blue doll with black hair and a pink shirt. The nurse gave the doll to me and I discover...
this is a doll from the game Ib. I came back home, blood splatered on the ground and I look at the computer again. There is a text named MASSAGEFROMIB.txt. It says:
ファイルがIB2.exeに名称変更しました...
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:English Class Failure
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
ICECUBEDROWNED.exe

If you're reading this I'm dead as I'm typing this blog on my powerless laptop in a storm with no power nor internet and I don't know if anyone will ever read it, but if you do heed my warning. Don't watch the movie Friday.
I purchased it at a flea marketi n Tijuana for 50 pesos and it had Ice Cube in it along with Chris Tucker(?) saying DAAAAAAAAAAAAMN a lot. Black comedy was funny but I paused the movie at one point to take a shit and Ice Cube jumped out of the screen.
"idiot you best turn that mofuckin movie back on or i kick your ass"
I panicked and threw my shit at the TV and Ice Cube was gone. With a TV now covered in faeces I had to find video games to play on MacIntosh. I remember in Tijuana I bought a game called "ICECUBEDROWNED.exe" and it seemed fun so I put it in and started playing it. The opening sequence had me collect 8 albums released by NWA and Ice Cube as well as finding copies of Friday. I found them all then got a screen of Ice Cube falling down the sky into the ocean and Chris Tucker appeared then said DAMN HE AIN'T GONNA BE IN RUSH HOUR THREE.
My computer then shut off and Ice Cube appeared behind me with a Glock and shot me. I'm now locked in my bathroom typing this dead trying to outlast Ice Cube but he's sitting outside rapping.
Never watch the movie Friday.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Im died
Category:File Extensions
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Shortpasta