nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
"I witnessed really hot ghost sex"

I am one of those ghost hunters that has never seen a ghost at all yet I still try to get one on camera so I can have brag about catching a ghost on camera, because I'm a waste that literally has nothing else to brag about. and finding places to get my attempt at fame i found an abandoned motel, and realizing that i would not run out of gas getting there (because I'm broke & all other places I would run out of gas trying), i went to the hotel, named "INSERT NAME HERE motel", going inside and looking around, it looked like a motel from around the 1950's, wooden walls and all i went behind the desk to look at the room keys and saw room key 169 was missing and scrambled to the room in hopes to find ghosts but when i tuned the corner...
A ZOMBIE JUMPED OUT AT ME! 
in a panic, I scrambled for the nearest object i could hide in which was an old car in the abandoned lot and stayed until my undead attacker left. but while i was hiding i felt a bit sick and lied down for a moment, then after waiting for a bit, got up and exited the car to continue the hunt for room 169. which didn't take long as i heard loud noises coming from room 169, I quietly opened the door to witness-
-REALLY HOT GHOST SEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!1!!!
seeing this magnificent sight, i mediately said (partly from arousal, partly because I've found ghosts) "AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGAA!!! AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGA!!! YYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW" the ghost couple clearly heard me(somehow) and the dominant guy ghost stop having his post-adult fun and whipped out his ghost shotgun and cocked it and I scrambled so quickly i forgot i was on the second floor but instead of slamming into the railing i phased though it, and floated in the air...
...then i looked at the car i hid in and realized... 
I DIED OF A HEART ATTACK FROM THE ZOMBIE SCARING ME!!1!!!1!!!!!11!11!11!1!!1!!!!
the i died again from the guy ghost shooting his ghost shotgun at me.
the end.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Ghoooosts
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Im died
Category:English Class Failure
"IdleTulip"

== First Day ==
*PizzaCerulean enters the chat*
His friends, DubaiRock and EiffelCroissant were there.
PizzaCerulean: Hello my peoples.
EiffelCroissant: Hey man!
DubaiRock: Yo skid.
EiffelCroissant: I just got yelled at by my dad. Luckily I'm not grounded.
PizzaCerulean: Come across that too.
PizzaCerulean: Yeah, it's traumatizing. You're lucky.
DubaiRock: I have a new computer because my other one had stupid viruses.
PizzaCerulean: Anyway. I'd like to do random stuff on YouTube but I've been banned due to "violation of the Community Guidelines".
*IdleTulip joins the server*
It was a very mysterious user. Its avatar was black. Not much to say until we progress into this story.
PizzaCerulean: And I really wasn't expecting someone to join us.
IdleTulip: why think door
EiffelCroissant: What does that MEAN!?
IdleTulip: why think door why think about window
The chat window turned somewhat black.
IdleTulip: why slam it why think door window must floor toys
*PizzaCerulean, DubaiRock, and EiffelCroissant were banned from the server*
*The server has closed*
== The Next Day ==
*PizzaCerulean, DubaiRock, and EiffelCroissant have made a new server*
PizzaCerulean: Okay I didn't get a thing out of that NOR did I expect us to get banned from the server.
DubaiRock: That'll be horrific...
PizzaCerulean: Let's try to do a normal conversation.
EiffelCroissant: OW MY FINGER!!!!1!!111!
PizzaCerulean: What the hay happened?
EiffelCroissant: It's bleeding...
EiffelCroissant: I'm crying in real life
*IdleTulip joins the server*
PizzaCerulean: Not again...
IdleTulip: Why break crab who digs for Buddha
*DubaiRock has been blocked globally*
EiffelCroissant: OH MY GOD MY HAND IS GREEN
EiffelCroissant: WHAT DO I DO
IdleTulip: Why do toilet
*EiffelCroissant dies in real life*
PizzaCerulean: Eiffel!
PizzaCerulean: EIFFEL RESPOND!!!
IdleTulip: Why respond lamp on bongos when maps
PizzaCerulean's whole desktop turns black. His desktop shortcuts have been renamed to "why think doors". He was still the only surviving.
IdleTulip: Why be here when trees
PizzaCerulean had his whole computer shut down. The time had fast forwarded to 1:00 AM. He went to sleep.
== Aftermath ==
TalkTiming has been removed from databases around the Internet in 2013, after the story of the incident had been leaked by PizzaCerulean on a blog.
As of then, PizzaCerulean had been living normally yet depressed. His friends DubaiRock and EiffelCroissant haven't been there since. We have already heard that Eiffel had died. DubaiRock had been lost since then.
Category:Not Sure if Troll or Trying to Be Serious
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:DIALOGUE!
"Is anyone here sincere?" Copypasta

Reading threads like these rile me up to try and argue or post something but literally what is the point if it's impossible to reliably asses if someone's post is in good faith? The only answer that makes sense is if I post in bad faith and attempt to derive enjoyment from the chaos, but then all these truths and hot takes suddenly don't mean anything. Of course it's stupid to participate unironically in these discussions, it only makes sense that you shouldn't try to connect with anonymous virgins who might just be looking to shitpost and have the absolute, completely unabashed freedom to write whatever the fuck they want for any purpose. It's especially easy to bait people now because of the sociopolitical landscape; something that's made a lot of people irritable, angry, and easy to fuck with. But it's been like this for years now, surely everyone's in on it now, right? Save for the poor 20 year old sap unfortunately having his fragile brains fucking scrambled.
It begs the question: are any of you truly bigots? Was there ever a truly right-wing wave here? No one here's a fascist at all, huh? I get it now, you must all be relatively reasonable, if particular vicious online, center-to-left shitposters orchestrating massive shit post brigades from various echo chambers and secret clubs, huh? I knew it. I fucking knew it. It's all one gargantuan bad faith act, the largest the world has ever seen. No one in this thread or any and all threads like it that have come before, here now, and come after will ever see. 2013 Internet never left after all, it just went full Tetsuo.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Rants
Category:Shortpasta
"Is that your grandad's coat?"

I think macklemore is trying to wage spiritual warfare on me. His song "thriftshop" has been tormenting me since I first heard it. However last night it got taken to a new level.
I was having a regular dream. I was eating some waffles and they were so delicious. Suddenly I heard a weird noise coming from the closet. To my horror I realized that it was the instrumental to "Thriftshop". And it was getting louder.
Fear gripped my chest tightly and I suddenly had the urge to check my pockets. 20 dollars. Only 20 dollars in them. Nothing else.
I awoke screaming in a cold sweat.
An icy wind fingered my ear through the window "Is that your grandad's coat?"
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Music
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
"It" Entity

I switched the record program on and prepared to record a video. I was going to record a video of "How to professionally survive a day in Minecraft". It was going to be my first web Minecraft video. I was rather excited to make it, and see the comments of my fellow gamers. Thus I switched the program on, and introduced myself. I moved my mouse onto the Minecraft shortcut on my taskbar, and clicked. Minecraft launcher loaded up, but something was terribly wrong. The frame of the launcher looked like the usual, but the screen was black. I frowned, and apologized to the viewers, trying to make up for it by claiming it was an Easter Egg or something similar. To be honest, I believed it was an Easter Egg myself. Finally, the screen started to show an image. A startling image. The image was of a bloody hand print, leaking off the launcher, and onto my regular desktop. I again apologized to the viewers with a stuttering voice, and hoped they understood. I lied that it was fake, and with trembling fingers, moved my mouse. Suddenly, the handprint disappeared. I stared at a single message were the updates usually were. "It is here- Sincerely, Notch. P.S: Sign off immediately.". I read the message over and over, fussing over what that could possibly mean. I did not bother to tell my viewers that this time, it was also fake. I just pressed play and ignored the warning. The Mojang screen loaded up, but then the entire screen turned black. I thought that maybe, it was just a glitched crash. The home screen appeared, but the background was entirely black, and there was a single button: "There's no escape", it said. I screamed softly, then hoped to edit the scream out of my video later. Suddenly, in the background, a sobbing girl appeared, crying tears of blood. She wasn't pixelated, but looked life-like. She pressed her palms against my screen and wailed. I was so transfixed, that I pressed the button. I looked in horror at what I had done. Now, I was teleported into a Minecraft jungle, with ocelots running around as usual. I looked up at the sky, and realized the sky was black and thundery. It started raining. I realized the rain was unusually red. I looked back down, and realized the ocelots disappeared. With her back to me, was a pixelated girl, in white robes, with long blonde hair. She was emitting strangled sobbing noises, like the one in the home screen. I egged on my viewers to keep watching. I tapped the shift button, and slowly advanced on the girl. Quickly, the girl whipped around, and her face had an evil grin, and then.... My game crashed. I tried to post the video on any Minecraft excepting web, but it was always deleted. Later, I got an email saying " 'It' Entity. You've been warned.".
Warning:
The entity is not real, so don't quote this post saying that it is. Thanks. This is only a made up creepypasta
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Minecrap
Category:Beings
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Well, that was pointless.
"Kirby" WHY?

i Loved kirby When I Was Little,
he Was Always A Cute Character,
i Also Main kirby In Super Smash Bros.
i Went To Buy A Kirby game For my Nintendo DS,
I Found A Strange SD Card Called,
"Final Fantasy XXX"
It Was Written In a Japanese Font,
i Took It And Went Home,
i Put It In My Nintendo DS And Started Playing,
It Didn't Show The HAL Logo Like It Always Does,
There Was No Title,
Only Press Start,
i Pressed Start,
i Checked Through All The Files,
The Only File Was
"File 0"
Strange...
i Decided To Click It,
There Was a Cut Scene,
It Started With Blue Greens,
But kirby Looked Different,
He Looked Scared,
kirby Was Crying And blood Was Coming Out Of His Mouth,
i Decided To Control kirby,
But kirby Walked Slow,
"COME ON!!!" i Said,
Later kirby Walked A Little Faster,
Then The Screen Turned Black, (
It Then Showed Kirby With King Dedede
But King dedede Had (hyper-realistic) Blood On His Hammer,
His Eyes Were Black
(hyper-realistic) Blood Was Coming Out Of His Eyes,
King dedede: I'M SORRY KIRBY... I MUST KILL YOU...
Then King Dedede Grabbed The Knife,
Then Dedede Said One Final Thing Before Killing kirby
King dedede: GOODBYE...kirby...
He Then Stabbed kirby
he Was Dead,
he Was In A Puddle Of Blood,
Then It Showed King dedede crying
The Screen Turned Black
then text read
(kirby IS DEAD... YOUR NEXT...)
Then kirby Showed Up,
kirby Was Still Crying And blood Was Coming Out Of kirby Mouth,
i turned the Nintendo DS Off.
I Never Played Any kirby Games EVER Again.
So, For Everyone, If you Find An Odd SD Card, Don't Pick It Up! Instead, Leave it, Because That's What I Should've Done Rather Than A Look At It!
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:Vidya games
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:Crappy ms paint drawings
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Shortpasta
"Make War, Not Peace"

I'm sure most of you are familiar with Roblox: a colorful blocky games where people can let their imagination go wild. Well, you may not know this, but there's a rare game made by a disgruntled Roblox intern.
The game's thumbnail is a hyper-realistic Bart Simpson with blood gushing out of his head and black eyes. 
Upon entering the game, you will be taken into a basic house. The game will look normal, until you type into the chat "make war, not peace." When saying said quote, you will be teleported into a black room with a chair. When sitting on the chair, a cutscene will begin.
A police officer will interrogate you about the kidnapping of his daughter. You can type into the chat "I don't know what you're talking about" or "She is at route 666 in Missouri."
When typing "She is at route 666 in Missouri": The officer will leave the room for about 2 minutes, before the screen becomes blurry. The character you're playing as will become unconscious. When waking up, you will be in a forest with a sign that says, "Make war, not peace."
When typing "I don't know what you're talking about": The officer will punch you with hyper-realistic blood escaping from the character's mouth. The officer will continue to hit you to the point of the screen turning flesh red. The character will be sent into a room with a man passed out on the floor lying next to a bottle of pills.
The game is highly suggested to be the creator's experience of being arrested for possession of illegal material and kidnapping.
Whatever you do, do not look for this game.
 
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Roblox
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
"My Dog is a War Criminal"

I knew my dog was a war criminal from the moment we adopted him. We were just peacefully eating dinner and he just ripped our food off the table. Me, my mom and dad were pissed so we bought a cage for him with a bed. After one day his bed was in shreds and the cage was dented by how much he wanted to get out. A few days went by and Mr. Pussy (We named him Mr. Pussy after awhile) went missing. We had no idea where he went but he reappeared on the front porch and had blood on his jaws. We assumed he ate a squirrel or something and washed him off. But when we turned on the TV we flicked to the news and we saw that in the middle east a dog that looked exacted like ours committed multiple war crimes. Here is a small list of all the war crimes he committed: 
*devastation not justified by military necessity 
*destruction of property that is of particular cultural significance
*torture and inhuman treatment, including biological experiments with dog treats 
*enslavement 
*persecutions on political, racial and religious grounds 
Our dog slowly walked into the living room, we were stunned and staring at the TV. Mr. Pussy was pissed that we haven't paid attention to him for the 2.5 milliseconds we looked at the TV. Mr. Pussy Began to attack the couch, we were starting to freak out. He then chased us downstairs into the basement and into a hidden room with a tunnel, we ran through the tunnel and came out in Germany. Mr. Pussy was still on our tail and quickly gaining on us, he herded us around the corner and into another basement. Mr. Pussy was right behind us and I noticed multiple swastika flags hanging down from the ceiling and technology I didn't think even existed. Mr. Pussy was snarling and foaming from the mouth and cornered us in this strange WWII room underground. He left us be and found a collar that translated his voice into a funny German accent but was translated in English. Mr. Pussy spoke, he said that he was actually Hitler and was trying to become human again because when he wanted to clone his conciseness his cronies misheard him and instead of cloning his consciousness they transferred his consciousness into a dog. Now he is trying to find a way to get into a human body, he said that me and my mom could be great hosts. While he was still monologuing how he would find a way to worm his way into our heads I picked him up and tossed him into a random machine. I powered it on and it separated Hitler's conciseness from the dog into an old timey video game cartridge. I took the cartridge and took it back home, I sold it on Ebay since I wanted some money for all the trouble we went through, and some poor sucker actually bought it for $420.69 I would hate to be them lol sucks to suck I guess, but hey I got decent money out of it. As for our dog he just went back to being a normal dog that doesn't commit war crimes. 
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Animulz
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
"Only a Spoonful" Dissected by Walter White

Jesse, of course I understand the joke. His friend offers him a single spoonful of ice cream, and so he pulls out an abnormally large novelty spoon. What you failed to grasp, Jesse, is that the spoon in the video is far too big to fit inside any commercially available ice cream container.
How exactly do you expect he's going to eat the ice cream? "Only a spoonful" is the backbone of our operation. If Gus ever realized that just one teaspoon's worth of meth was tainted, he'd put targets on our backs. I'm looking at the bigger picture, Jesse.
And if you want to survive in this business, I suggest you stop wasting time showing me these six second comedy skits.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Memes
Category:Shortpasta
"Roblox Ability Wars Is Down" Copypasta

Its been so long without Ability Wars. I can't feel the overpoweredness of Freeze, Time and God Punch and it is making me go insane. I have never felt this experience before and honestly, I hate it. I can't live without Ability Wars. Ability Wars is life.
Its very hard not to equip Bionic and aimbot on every single player in the game and it is causing me extreme pain. More than 5 minutes without Ability Wars causes me to have this... feeling inside of my head. A tingle that just makes me have to play Ability Wars no matter where I am.
In Class I sneak on my Phone, in the Shower I play on Ability Wars. I have even resorted to creating a PC using a raspberry Pi Just so I can play Ability Wars PC Mode. This craze is insane. Ability Wars is my entire Purpose in Life and if I cant have Ability Wars then nobody should. I need Ability Wars to live. The Slime of Slime Ability is my blood and the Time Ability is what keeps me moving on Earth.
In about an hour, my Slime will stop pumping and my Time will stop moving UNTIL Ability Wars comes back. I'm not sure what to do. Am I going insane? Is this normal? Does everybody experience this? I cant stop trembling and shaking. HELP ME. A few minutes ago the realization that Ability Wars is gone has made me (and I am not even joking) GLANCE AT SLAP BATTLES!
It's been an hour since ability wars went down, I already grabbed a shotgun and I swear im seeing the pennywise clown, barney came to help but a balloon murdered him, I feel like im going insane and none of this is real; some people are even recommending I play slap battles, but I could never betray the perfect game, ability wars.
She's my baby, she's my life; every day I wake up and skip school to have coition with my perfect baby ability wars, I love it so much if I ever played any Roblox game I feel like I would've had a seizure, I don't need help, I need ability wars.
I need Ability Wars...
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Roblox
Category:Memes
Category:Shortpasta
"See you later alligator"

I was at the zoo one day, and I saw some fucking alligators! I politely let them finish, and then I said, "see you later alligator." The thing is, I never saw those alligators again, and now they probably think I'm a filthy liar.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Memes
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Animulz
"Sorry but I have to go now" Copypasta

Sorry but I have to go now. My asshole is currently burning because of liquid feces exiting out of my anus. This happened because today I went to eat to a restaurant named Taco Bell, and ordered a bean burrito. When I exited the Taco Bell drive-thru, I drove home, parked my car and exited the car. Then I proceeded to turn the doorknob, push the door, walk towards the dining room and sit down on a chair. I then proceeded to place the bag of food on the table, and then I opened it. Then I unwrapped the burrito and ate the burrito. I, in total, took 23 bites out of it. After that, I proceeded to gulp the Coca-Cola until it was empty. Twenty minutes after that, my stomach starts hurting, so I go to the bathroom. I end up shitting my pants a little but make it into the toilet. I stayed in the toilet suffering for 30 minutes before washing my hands, exiting the bathroom, walking towards my bedroom, and laying down on the bed. My asshole now has third-degree burns from the meal I just had. It is also bleeding now. So I have to go now. Bye.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta