Happy Demonic Year

It was 12/31/2017 and I was driving around town to get some fireworks for the new year. I was driving when I saw a crudely designed store with a sign that said "New Year's Store" on it in black marker. The store looked run down as I pulled into its parking lot.
When I entered the store, I was greeted with a dark display. The store was almost pitch black as I walked up to a shelf with "Fireworks" on it. The only item there was this box with "Fireworks" on it. I grabbed 2 of them and went to the cashier. When I got to him, he said, "That'll be 2 dollars."
I was confused, but I concluded that he knew the cost of the items right away. I gave it to him and he handed a bag with the newly-purchased fireworks in it. Right when I turned around, the cashier laughed in a tone that I could only describe as demonic and said, "Have a Happy Demonic Year..."
I turned around to question this, but saw that the cashier vanished into thin air. I walked to and got in my car to find some strange discoveries. The mile count on my car was now 666 miles and my max speed was 666 mph. I was a bit unnerved as I went back to my house to set up for the new year.
When it was 11:30 PM, my family and I started to set up the fireworks. When I opened a box up, I found a note. It had words on it crudely written in a red liquid. It read, "Light these up and misfortune will befall you..."
I grabbed the fireworks and got ready to light them up. At 12:00 PM, I lighted up a firework, and at the instant it was lit, my wife said, "My stomach hurts."
I said, "Maybe you should get some rest in our room."
She agreed and went to our room. I looked at the firework I lighted up fly into the sky. The pattern it made looked like a skull with an eerie grin, and I vaguely connected this to my wife. I ran to my room to find a shocking discovery. My wife was hanging from the ceiling. I cried and screamed. When I heard my son's footsteps, I told him to not come in my room because I was doing something. I also told him to light the other firework. My son said, "Alright."
I examined the scene around my wife. I noticed a message on the wall written in my wife's blood and handwriting. The message read, "Don't light the other firework."
I shrieked in horror of what I had just done. I ran out my room to my son outside. I screamed as I saw a skull with an eerie grin in the sky. I found my son, but he was not alive. He had blood around his eyes and mouth. There was a piece of paper on his chest, so I picked it up. I noticed it was written in my son's blood and handwriting. The message read, "Why did you do this to me dad?"
I cried as I noticed that their deaths were my fault. If only I destroyed those fireworks. I ran back to the "New Year's Store" to get some answers. When I busted the door open, the cashier from before looked at me with an eerie grin as if he anticipated my arrival. I yelled at him, "Why did you sell me those demonic fireworks?"
He said, "Didn't you read the note?", then demonically laughed.
I collapsed in the store in sadness. While I was laying on the ground, the cashier laughed demonically at me and set a matchbox and a demonic firework near my face. I realize what I must do to atone for my family's deaths. This new year does not start off well for me...
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:Trollpasta