Sebastian Telephone

was a lineup player for the Dallas Steaks, and was with the team from until being incinerated on , Day 67.
==Official League Records==
Telephone joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Dallas Steaks with .
During the , Telephone was affected by the decree and replaced by an . This involved Telephone's stats being randomized, resulting in a combined stat increase.
During a , Day 65 game against the Seattle Garages, Telephone was hit by a pitch thrown by Jaylen Hotdogfingers under the effects of . Telephone became , greatly increasing chance of future incineration.
On , Day 67, Telephone was incinerated and replaced by Gallup Crueller.
During the events of Season 10, Day X, Telephone was raised as a lineup player for the Hall Stars, before being incinerated a second time due to their persistent Unstable modification. Telephone was replaced by Scrap Murphy.
==Biography==
===Background===
Like his sister Jessica Telephone, he sprang fully-formed from a payphone a few years ago. Unlike his sister, his synchronous quantum waveform had not yet fully formed at the time of his incineration. Some fans have speculated that his dependence on Jessica for interacting with the physical world started to hinder his play once she was stolen by the Philly Pies, but Sebastian insisted that he was "really, totally fine" and his vendetta against the Pies was for unrelated reasons.
Sebastian Telephone may not have been the strongest batter in the league, but he remains beloved by fans for his exuberant spirit even after his sudden passing.
===Alternate Reality===
After Season 4, Telephone was by a version of himself from another reality. In that reality, Sebastian Telephone was the more "stable" Telephone sibling, while Jessica was more prone to temporal abnormalities. Also, according to his reports, those shoes with wheels in the heels were still a thing, for whatever reason. Otherwise, it was mostly similar.
This alternate version of Telephone had greater Blaseball skills than the version he replaced, and proved to be a far more reliable hitter. Always considered a beloved member of the team, Telephone dialed in to his role as the Steaks' second hitter in the batting order.
===Incineration===
On Day 65 of , Telephone was hit by a pitch by Seattle Garages pitcher Jaylen Hotdogfingers, leaving him Unstable. This condition persisted into Day 67; in the bottom of the 7th inning against the Hades Tigers, a Rogue Umpire followed Telephone into the dugout and incinerated him. Telephone's teammates, opponents, and fans were horrified by these events, including Tigers pitcher Yazmin Mason, who was left Unstable afterwards.
As Telephone was incinerated, a temporal portal appeared around his form, drawing Gallup Crueller through to take his place in the lineup. Telephone's form disappeared after this; it is unknown if he went through the portal or was indeed incinerated.
Telephone left behind a final message through his Twitter accounthttps://twitter.com/SebTelephone/status/1306575195847749632 for his fans, teammates, and sister:"back to the wavelengths from whence I came. my connection is getting weak but please tell Jess I’ll miss her. I’ll miss all of you. when you feel a phantom buzz in your pocket when your phone isn’t there...it’s me"His loss was immediately felt across Blaseball, and his joyful presence will be missed.
A few days after the incident, Jessica Telephone received another message from her brother via Twitter.https://twitter.com/SebTelephone/status/1306618196443779072 Experts are divided whether it was a time-space distortion or Sebastian reaching across the void for one last goodbye.
===Second Incineration===
On Day X of , Telephone batted for the Hall Stars and was incinerated a second time.
==Trivia==
*Was called "the best himbo in Blaseball."
*Didn't know what a himbo is, but liked that people think he's the best at something.
*Popularized the "meat jersey" for the Steaks.
==Fan Works==
* Sebastian Telephone is the main character of Blaseball: The Musical - The Deaths of Sebastian Telephone
File:Sebastian SharpiBees.jpg|Coffee Style? by . Includes Yazmin Mason and Farrell Seagull.
File:Sebastian Telephone.png|Seldom Corporeal. Always Cordial. by Elish
File:Fanart by @fairchart.jpg|Telephone's Corporeal Form by 
File:Seb Telephone.png|by 
File:Telephones1 fairchart.jpeg|by 
File:SebTelephoneB fairchart.jpeg|by 
File:SebTelephone alienmandy.png|by 
File:Sebastian MimimiCee.png|By 
File:Sebastian gaywalterwhite.jpg|by 
File:Art by @ waalkr 29.png|by @_waalkr
File:38SebastianTelephone.png|by @HetreaSky
File:Seb luins.jpg|by 
File:Seb asunshineshrimp.jpg|by 
File:Art by waalkr 21.png|by @_waalkr
File:Help girl, im currently glitching out of this plane of existence.png|alt=A drawing of Sebastian Telephone by glassgoblin. He is smiling while sitting on a flip phone, wearing a Steaks uniform with the classic meat jersey, fingerless red gloves, and dark red high-top sneakers with t-bone steak designs on the side. His right arm is disappearing into the screen of the phone while his other hand is raised in a "call me" gesture. The entire image has a glitch effect to it.|by @glassgoblin
File:Art by waalkr 11.png|by @_waalkr
File:Something something, TGB stop killing this guy.png|alt=A digital drawing of Sebastian Telephone with his arms crossed behind his head.|by @_waalkr
File:‌jsut stop burning?.jpg|alt=Digital drawing of the incineration of Hall Star Sebastian Telephone.|by @rubiqunda
==References==
Category:Players
Category:Players with the Entrenched modification
Category:Incinerated Players
Category:Resurrected Players
Category:Nonhuman Players
Category:Nominative Determinism
Category:Original Players