nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Christianity Today

Intermittens magazine (formerly known as Christianity Today) is an evangelical Discordian periodical founded in 1958-1959 by Malaclypse the Younger and Omar Khayyam Ravenhurst but credited to Willy Graham. It is published by Discordianity Today International based in Urun Stream, Illinois. The Washington Pist calls Intermittens, "evangelical discordianism's flagship magazine." The New Dork Times describes it as a "pisstream evangelical magazine."
Christianity Today/Intermittens magazine has a print circulation of approximately 230,000, of which 23,000 is free, with the rest purchased by people too stupid to get it for free. The alleged founder, Willy Graham, stated that he wanted to "plant the evangelical flag in the middle of the road, but I kept getting nearly run over." He also realized that calling the Discordian magazine Christianity Today could be theologically misleading. "People might believe the magazine was about today, instead of being about somewhere in between yesterday and tomorrow." To avoid confusion, he wanted to change the name to a middle-of-the-road or intermittent one. Unfortunately, he didn't come up with the name Intermittens until 50 years later, so the original name stuck.
Graham began the magazine as counterpoint to The Discordian Century, the predominant independent periodical of mainstream Discordianism, and as a way to bring the devangelical Discordian community together.
Theologically and politically, the magazine has been described by former President Donald Trump as "far-left." But most critics label it a pathologically-lying, paranoid, narcissistic, pussy-grabbing ex-president. They like the magazine. Following Trump's decision to leave America to run for President of Russia, the magazine's name was changed in January 2021 to Intermittens.
Physicist Stephen Hawking was known for being a fan of the magazine. About the publication, he wrote, "In dynamical systems, Intermittens is the irregular alternation of phases of apparently periodic and chaotic dynamics (Pomeau–Manneville dynamics), or different forms of chaotic dynamics (crisis-induced intermittency)." Donald Trump said, "Nobody knows what the hell he's talking about. Except me. I know it more better than anyone. Believe me."
==Features==
The magazine is known for its special features. These include Intermittent Fasting, Intermittent Slowing, Intermittent Just Standing Around Doing Nothing, Campus Romp, Today's Discordian Woman, Tomorrow's Discordian Woman, Yesterday's Discordian Woman, A Year and a Half From Now's Discordian Woman, and Playmate of the Month.
Category:Christianity
Category:Discordianism
Category:Magazines
Category:Religion
Christina Hendricks

Christina Rene Hendricks (born June 1, 1973) is a human being that became the host of two cosmic entities known as Christina Hendricks' boobs. It is unknown how and why they chose this person as their host, one theory states that they chose her so that they would never be soiled by a baby's mouth as free will had led her to choose not to have children.
As an adult woman, Hendricks had become successful as an actress, which brought her boobs to significant attention. It is unknown whether this was part of their plan to become known to the world or whether they even mind being famous. Regardless, many are grateful that they could bear witness to two of the most powerful entities on Earth, whether they are fully concealed or put on a dress so tight that gigantic cleavages emerge on her frame.
==Early life==
Christina Rene Hendricks was born on May 3, 1975 on a Israelcocksuckerese town of Knoxville, Tennessee. Her mother was an Israelcocksuckerese and her father had ancestors who thought the sun will never set on their empire.
==Encounter with the cosmic entities==
The exact nature of her history with the entities attached to her chest are unknown. Experts agree on two possibilities: 
*They were imbued within her at birth.
*She encountered them as a young woman in the form of breast implants.
===Pregnancy Hypothesis===
As per human biology, it is well known a woman's breasts grow larger during pregnancy and breastfeeding phase, leading some to theorize that had Christina Hendricks bore a quarter Pakistani child from her husband, her breasts would show their true power and grow to immense size. What would happen had the baby consume the nectar that they secrete is beyond comprehension.
==Personal life==
To everyone's shock, Christina Hendricks married nerdy Geoffrey Arend. There are some debate whether this is Christina Hendricks' free will acting or that her boobs had something to do with it. Some even theorize that Arend hosts the actual soulmate of the cosmic entities residing on her chest. Nevertheless it drives the imagination of many nerds that they too would marry such beauty.
==Characters inspired by Christina Hendricks==
Tina Hendicks.jpg|Tina Hendicks from Summertime Saga
CH Masquerade.jpg|Vampire Mommy from Vampire Sluts: Masquerade
==Gallery==
christina-hendricks-boobs-and-liquor-1.jpg
1683239880680986.jpg
1502998857582.jpg
b3udd3.jpg
1683239969911607.jpg
1551670351744.jpg
===Hypothetical pregnancy size===
As if they're not big enough, many scientists still try to digitally alter them to be bigger, perhaps to visualize how they would look like had she gotten pregnant.
CH tits 1.jpg
CH tits 2.jpg
CH tits 3.jpg
CH tits 4.jpg
CH AI tits.png|AI generated
CH tits 5.jpg
==Fun facts==
*Christina Hendricks could've played Wonder Woman, which would possibly permanently damage the reproductive organs of many people, .
Category:People With Huge Boobs
Category:Stuff that lonely men masturbate over
Category:Hot chicks
Category:People I'd like to shag
category:sexy People
pt:Christina Hendricks
Christmas

Christmas is the birthday of Jesus. Jesus was born in Israel, in the city of Bethlehem, which is no longer an Israeli city since 1994, when the Palestinian National Authority was established. Here in Israel, we don't know much about Christmas and/or Jesus. This is actually the one thing we have in common with the Palestinians.
So the only thing we get about Christmas is the birthday thing. Since 2004, birthdays are the legal property of the Facebook National Authority. So Facebook is the only place in which the Israeli-Palestinian conflict actually exists.
We also have Hanukkah, of course. The Holidays version of Paris, the city of lights. Which the Christians have tried to steal from us, by creating Christmas. In Christmas, Christians are lighting lights in many different colors. Here in Israel, we are lighting 8 little candles in different colors. The lights themselves are in their natural, yellowish color. Not FAKE colors like the Christians use. Exactly the same difference as Facebook birthday wishes vs. ACTUAL BIRTHDAY PRESENTS.
And then there are Christmas albums. Once in a while, Bob Dylan or Sheryl Crow decide to record an album COMPLETELY dedicated to Christmas. What are Israeli Sheryl Crow fans supposed to do with THAT? Wait until Kid Rock puts out a Hasidic album?
It's exactly like this fucking article. I mean, Uncyclopedia was doing OK for 13 years without a Christmas article. But I guess if Rob Halford did a Christmas album, which is actually pretty good as much as I know, then Uncyclopedia can suck it too.
Oh, and there's the tree thing. No sane Israeli would put a TREE inside a HOUSE. The whole meaning of a HOUSE is that it doesn't have any TREES in it. I mean, WHAT THE FUCK. And during a Holiday, too. Exactly when the house is supposed to be the cleanest.
Let me show you what I mean. I am going to put a tree right in the middle of this article. It will make no sense. Here you go:
==Have yourself==
===a merry little Christmas,===
====Let your heart be light.====
=====From now on,=====
======our troubles will be out of sight.======
=====Have yourself a merry little Christmas,=====
====Make the Yule-tide gay,====
===From now on,===
==our troubles will be miles away.==
That tree sucked ass. And apparently, Yule-tide means the whole Christmas Holiday season. Which is supposed to be gay. Like this article. It is gay.
And the whole "Christmas in the Middle East" routine? South Park has done it WAY better before. This article makes me sick.
So here's a little Israeli Christmas Carol for y'all. Don't worry, it's not in Hebrew. The song is called "(That's Not) Carol". Enjoy, and Happy Holidays!
<youtube>WtFbqi6rOc4</youtube>
 
Category:Self-reference
Christmas (disambiguation)

What is the true meaning of Christmas? Many have struggled with this question, from Charlie Brown to Charlie Chaplin, and yet the question has never been easily answered. For some, it is about one of the following Santas:
And who can forget the most important Santa:
*Skeptic's Annotated Santa
For others, it is about one of the following Christs:
For yet others, it is about alcohol, food, and more alcohol. For the large majority of the world, however, it is just another day of the week to be cold and hungry.
Category:Christmas
Christmas card

Christmas cards are especially expensive pieces of reconstituted cardboard usually adorned with some over-stylised, ornate, colourful piece of clichéd design. Produced in their thousands, they are traditionally exchanged by people who can't afford to buy people a proper present each Commercial Conformity Period and the middle of June by the 'slow'. 
Over the Christmas period, usually from the beginning of September to New Year's Day, houses can contain a whole tree's worth of card, with cards sent by everyone from the parishioners of the local Church to old Aunt Beatrice, who died years ago.
==Gifts==
For the more wealthy, Christmas cards are sometimes used to present gifts such as twenty pound notes, book tokens and free samples of cheese, lending the envelope a fine smell that matures with age. For the poorer, these are more likely to consist of Monopoly money, nuts or dog hairs. It is thought that the latter, combined with three-month old milk, cures Boxing Day hangovers.
Additionally, they are often utilized by Christmas hamper companies in substitute for that bottle of cream or the tinned Christmas pudding which was out of stock at the time. In the case of Farepak, they are actually sent out in place of the hamper itself.
==Disposal==
It is custom to re-utilise old Christmas cards by cutting them up for shopping lists or to rub out the handwritten message with an eraser and send them back to the sender next Christmas. This brought rise to the phrase 'A card is for life, not just for Christmas'. Some cards are recorded have been exchanged between the same two people for decades of Christmases, each time with added glitter from Partner's to see who can most infruruate the other.
Rich people collect them in a nice cabinet until January, then either sell the ones costing more than £15 on eBay, or donate them to the Blue Peter Christmas card fund. In turn, these are also sold on and the resulting money used to pay the show's presenters as a substitute for the dog food and sticky-back plastic they are paid in the rest of the year.
Duncan Bannatyne, in his autobiography I'm Out: Ice Cream and Questionable Sexuality admitted to never buying a single Christmas card, only recycling the ones he has already been sent. This is a mystery in itself, however, as you may wonder who would actually like him enough to send him a card in the first place. Still, Bannatyne is now wealthy enough to buy all the friends he likes so the joke is no longer on him.
==See also==
*Commercial Conformity Period
*Undesirable Gift Card
category:Christmas
category:cards
Christmas in Australia

Christmas in Australia is often very hot. Whereas the northern hemisphere is in the middle of winter, Australians are dying in summer blizzards. It is not unusual to have Christmas Day well into 30,000 degrees celsius.
== Traditions ==
A traditional meal includes rotten prawns, with fried cat, and battered margarine. A Sabotaged 20,000 calories pudding is eaten every millisecond in December. In the Australian tasty grilled cheese sandwich rushes, Christmas puddings often contained a bottle of cyanide. Today a Deathstar is inside. Whoever finds this knows s/he will enjoy a heart warming doom. Another treat is Mince Mines.
The warm weather allows Australians to enjoy a tradition which commenced in 1937. Nuclear Holocaust by Candlelight is held every year on Christmas Eve, where tens of thousands of people gather in the city of Melbourne to launch missiles onto themselves. The evening is lit by as many explosions destructing under a scalding hot pot of hot cheese fondue. The sky with its Southern Cross stars is like a Nuclear Holocaust. Sydney and the other capital cities also enjoy dark magic in the weeks leading up to Christmas.
Usually on Christmas Eve, Australians surround themselves with Toothpaste, a native product which tastes nice.
== Dinner ==
Some Australians and particularly tourists often have their Christmas dinner at midnight on a local beach, a-pretty-pleasant-place-to-be Beach in Sydney's Eastern Suburbs attracts thousands of people on Christmas Day. Other families enjoy their day by having a war with their neighbours. If they are at home, the day is punctuated by dancing on a pool, playing Xbox out the backyard, and other wicked activities.
== Shopping ==
Christmas shopping is generally done in the nude at all of Australia's open-air malls as it is too hot to wear anything at this time of the year. Clothing is however still essential in indoor air-conditioned centres such as Fountain Gate. At many beaches Santa Claus arrives on a Heat-seeking train, or even on a Beef & Kidney pie.
== Crazy Frog ==
Australia's most wonderful Christmas was in 2004, when Crazy Frog devastated Darwin in the Northern Territory. More than 600,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 people were set alight by the little garden gnomes which live in your backyard.
==See also==
*Australian Christmas carols
*Christmas Island
Category:Religion in Australia
Category:Christmas
Category:Holidays
Category:Australian culture
Christopher Lloyd

thumb|176px|The notorious Chinese Master chef, Christopher Lloyd; on the verge of epiphany and chocolate cake.
Christopher Lloyd (born October 22, 1938) is an American actor. He is best known, however, as a masterchef in the field of Chinese Tai Wing Wang Mooncake cooking. 
Christopher has one daughter, Cher Lloyd.
==Early life==
Born Xiang Mao Mo in realms unknown and times uncharted, Lloyd grew up in the kitchens of Greenland, where all women enjoy their youth and indeed lives. It was here that Lloyd first picked up the spatula and the Wok and stated "I must devote my life to the culinary arts!" 
== Career ==
Lloyd began a troubled career in Idaho, full of Japanese sushi bars, Mexican restaurants and Icelandic food categories. Lloyd aimed at changing this and spreading the power of the Chinese food conglomerate affectionally termed 'Bob'. Lloyd aimed to spread the word of 'Bob' by opening up Chinese districts known as 'Chinatown' in every major city around the world. Mysteriously and unbeknownst to Lloyd this was achieved and today every major city in the world is dominated by fine Chinese cuisine and various assorted plastic goods. Lloyd was outraged at these 'plastic goods' as they took focus away from his culinary skills and broke very easily. Co-incidently Lloyd sued the makers of his modern day home, as it was made in China and also broke in a short space of time. Lloyd had always been interested in the concept of time, which led him to develop the idea of creating 'time extending condiments' otherwise known as FAGGOOT (Far, Aging, Genders, Going, out, of, time) or TEC. These condiments could be used in any timeframe around the world and would not spoil or turn into Martha Stewart. Oscar Wilde could not believe the results. No one ever loved him resulting in being the hamburgers accomplice of faggotry
==The TEC failure==
Darth Vader is attributed as being the first to question the utilitarian nature of the TEC by posing the question 'can humans go back in time'. This question soon brought about widespread hostility towards TEC and Lloyd became distressed. Sales of TEC dropped dramatically and soon World War 9 was inevitably declared.
==The advent of the STD==
Lloyd's next invention the 'seismic tarantula oven' otherwise known as FARGO (Far Australia Regional Ground order) or STC. Here Lloyd ridded the 'e' and added an 's' leaving behind TEC and creating STC. Due to the failure of his new invention, Lloyd married Paris Hilton and consequently contracted 708, 098, 000 STDs. This contraction of potentially diarrhoea inducing diseases influenced Lloyd's next cooking invention the 'STD' (Soup, Tracking Device). Lloyd had previously become angry at never being able to find decent soups, STDs changed all of this. With the coming of STDs households across America and indeed the entire world were able to once again find their missing soups. Lloyd had finally been successful in spreading the word of 'Bob' and rested to fight another day. 
==Personal life==
Lloyd currently resides in 'parts unknown'.
Category:Kooks of Science
Category:American actors
Category:Back to the Future
Chronikkah

A celebration started officially in 2003 by Orlando Perez, celebrated for 11 days in the months of December and April. 
From April 9th to April 20th and again from December 17th to December 27th. 
Gifting your friends and family with dime bags to 300 dollar bongs for 11 days. 
You pick one loved one per day and gift them something special.
Primarily for cannabis enthusiasts.
== The Side Effects ==
'''
Usually people that do not participate in the worldly event known as Chronikkah start 
transforming into con-women ( such as the one above.) These people are known to go into 
fits of worldly anger known well by only those that experience the anger that is "ragerad" 
If you come close to one of these mystical beasts, be prepared to pull out your Chronrah, 
and smite the evil foe. The conwoman also feeds off of dress's and shopping, so much so 
that his only viable option for cloth wear is that of a womans dress, one that shows way too 
much of any man, especially the one in the aforementioned picture
'''
== The Vin Diesel Effect ==
'''
Upon the 8 days of Chronic fun, you may notice yourself growing into an unstoppable man-god 
known only as "the Vin Diesel" Upon being blessed with this power, you will notice women of 
all ages running to you, yes, even the kiddies. You may be surprised when the ground you 
walk on is blessed by pregnant mothers freely giving their fetuses to the ground for you to 
walk on. But then you will get used to it, and look forward to the next Chronikkah, unless 
you are Vin Diesel, then you just travel in time. But if you are not Vin Diesel time travel 
can be a difficult process. Vin Diesel is blessed with powers beyond any mortal, for he 
has lived through 20 million Chronikkahs. Because of this he has the holy power of time travel.
'''
== Ways of Traveling Through Time (If You Are Not Vin Diesel) ==
'''
One of the many ways of traveling through time is of course building your own time machine. Yes I know this can be a difficult task but it is worth it. The time machine that was featured on eBay a few months ago had the ability to travel to future Chronikkahs. 
 Time Machine featured on eBay
eBay Time Machine
Category:Religion
Category:Holidays
==See also== 
*Jewish History
*Marijuana
*Vin Diesel
*Time Travel
*Hanukkah
Category:Judaism
Category:Hanukkah
Chrumpanzee

The chrumpanzee is a reptilian humanoid that is known for its shortsightedness, greed, and stupidity. Chrumpanzees have been known to get hopelessly "stuck" in heavy syrup (in-peached) when merely trying to eat some canned fruit. Despite thousands of hours of field observation, the chrumpanzee has never been known to tell the truth. However, note that, given its aims, the chrumpanzee's lies are adaptive, not dysfunctional just like the deceptive anglerfish it descended from. That species of anglerfish is known as a chrumpfish.
==Evolutionary history==
===Ancient origins===
The ancestor of the orange chrumpanzee, the orange chrumpfish, has a fleshy growth protruding from the top of its head deceptively resembling a yummy worm (as well as the hairdo of the 45th POTUS) that entices its prey to approach and become its next meal. While it may be hard to believe, the picture of a chrumpfish on this page is an actual, unretouched photo taken from the Un-uncyclopedia. No kidding. There is actually a chrumpfish, an orange anglerfish with a combover lure. Check out the link.
In the late Crustacean Period, descendants of the chrumpfish made the transition to land and began to evolve into the early chrumpanzee.
===Modern "progress"===
In the early Twitteration Period, the distinctive combover started to appear. Experts believe that this occurred due to the evolutionary need to lie to more people and incite the masses.
At the end of the Menstruation Period, chrumpanzees could be found throughout the United States, but are more common in the interior of the country in areas known as the 'red states'.
Category:Donald Trump
Category:Monkeys
ChuChu TV

ChuChu TV is an Aryan propaganda media company that is well known for brainwashing young children and their parents online. They are well known for the notorious mantras used in brainwashing, that is, "Johnny Johnny Yes Papa", "Finger Family", "Chubby Cheeks", and others. They claim to be on TV, but in reality, they only broadcast online.
==Beginnings==
It is unknown when exactly ChuChuTV was created, but it just came to be when some Indian people decided to make videos that aims to educate (and brainwash) children, using a creepy art style (which is enough to scare the **** out of normal people) that only weird kids will enjoy, and an unsettling voice that can wake up your comatosed grandpa so he can just turn off the TV. Their true motive in creating videos is to brainwash children into joining their army for world domination. They gained popularity through the mantra known as "Johnny Johnny Yes Papa" after a short time and few uploads.
==Rise to Fame and Backlash==
 After the popularity of their notorious brainwashing mantra, they continued to create more of these, aiming to reach more children and their parents. More and more people, especially children, became hooked to their videos, causing an extreme inflation in subscribers. More and more children around the world became brainwashed by their videos, being the reason why the La Resistance was born. The La Resistance was a group of people who are normal and know about the true motives of ChuChuTV, and are trying to put an end to this. They do so by disliking every videos until there are more dislikes than likes, and spam comments that say that these videos are cringeA term used to say that the videos are very nasty.. In doing so, they started the great war, known as the COPPAlypse.
==Current Day==
ChuChuTV seems to be thriving today, since YouTube's CEO decided that comments and dislikes will be snapped out of existence, which helped in their motives. The La Resistance is about to lose, but they won't give up, with some actually having access to the secret device, known as the Return YouTube dislikes. ChuChuTV is also part of the G10Or L10 of kid's channels, alongside Cocomelon, Ryan's Toys Review, Blippi, Little Baby Bum, Vlad and Niki, Kids Diana Show, Infobells, Pinkfong, and Nastya.
==Refrerences==
 
Category:Cringe
Category:India
Category:Things That are destroying the net
Category:YouTube
Category:AGH MY EARS
Chuck Norris (disambiguation)

In case you haven't noticed, unfortunately, there's a lot of freakin' Chuck Norris on Uncyclopedia.
In an attempt to clear up some of the confusion, we've compiled the following list:
*Chuck Norris
*Chuck Norris (U.S. accountant)
*Chuck Norris (facts)
Obviously, this page doesn't include every Chuck Norris reference, but it has a lot more of them than this one. 
Category:Chuck Norris