Karlach/Banter

A collection of Karlach's remarks and overhead conversations with other characters.
== Remarks ==
===Selected===
Out of combat
* Let's march!
* What a charmer.
* Hey, good-looking.
* C'mon, let's go!
* I could go for a good meal.
* Damn, it's good to be alive.
* Soldier.
* I'd love to, thanks.
* Making me sweat.
* Wanna dance?
* What's cooking?
* Don't be shy.
* Don't burn yourself.
* Attention!
* Well, well, well.
* What's the story?
* La-da-da-da…
* Hey-ho.
Sneaking
* Let's march!
* What a charmer.
* Hey, good-looking.
* C'mon, let's go!
* I could go for a good meal.
* Damn, it's good to be alive.
* Ready for some good news.
* Soldier.
* I'd love to, thanks.
* You're making me sweat.
* Wanna dance?
* What's cooking?
* Don't be shy.
* Don't burn yourself.
* Attention!
* Well, well.
* What's the story?
* Dum-dee-dum.
In combat
* Let's cook with fire, baby.
* Now this is my happy place.
* Hup hup!
* On my word.
* I got this.
* Bye forever, pal.
* I'm heating up!
* GODS, it's HOT in here!
* Put 'em up.
* Hahahaha!
* My turn.
* I smell blood.
* All right, Karlach, it's go time.
* This is gonna feel good.
* Ready for another round?
* Let's GO!
* Watch this.
* Fuck yes!
===Selection spam===
Out of combat
* Don't. Poke. The Karlach.
* Who am I?
* My eye!
* Sound of blowing a raspberry
Sneaking
* My back can't take much more of this.
* Not now, I'm being a sneak!
* I'm getting too old for this nonsense.
* I'm not built to crouch.
In combat
* Eyes on the prize - we need to win this!
* Not every soldier should've made it out of training.
* Eyes on victory, tummy on dinner.
* I ought to just burn this whole thing down.
===Moving===
Out of combat
* Hup to.
* All right.
* Marching.
* Soldier?
* On my way.
* There we go.
* What next?
* Lalala.
* Oh yeah.
* Let's go!
* Heyy.
* Uh huh.
* Phew!
* Movin' it.
* Where to?
* Got it.
* Let's ride.
* Saddle up.
* Honk honk.
* Yeah-ha.
* Me?
* If you insist.
* While I'm at it.
* Toes, toes.
Sneaking
* I'm too tall for this...
* Halfling essence...
* Long n' low.
* Rat feet.
* Sneak sneak.
* Quiet.
* Shadowlach
* Shh...
* I'm nothing!
* Light as air
* Turn down the fire.
* Whisper mode.
In combat
* Over there!
* Heading out.
* Find a route.
* Moving.
* Tactical.
* Close ranks.
* In position!
* Jimmy on the go.
* Covered.
* Knees high.
* I've got it.
* Count on me.
* No surrender.
* Got it.
* Under their noses.
* Aye aye.
* Soldier.
* Incoming!
===Attack===
Out of combat
* Eat it. 
* The hammer's gonna fall. 
* Say bye-bye. 
* Want another? 
* Poor fucker. 
* Need to learn the hard way? 
* Open up. 
* Down the hatch. 
* You're not gonna like this, mate. 
* Cry about it. 
* Well, well. Look what we have here. 
* You shouldn't have tried me. 
* Watch this! 
* Boom! 
* Ready for this? 
* What's it going to take? 
* C'mon, Karlach - show 'em who you are. 
* I'm going to enjoy this.
In combat
* Watch this! 
* Boom! 
* What's it going to take? 
* Ready for this? 
* C'mon, Karlach - show 'em who you are. 
* I'm going to enjoy this. 
* Ooh, fun. 
* Eat it. 
* The hammer's gonna fall. 
* Say bye-bye. 
* Want another? 
* Poor fucker. 
* Need to learn the hard way? 
* Open up. 
* Down the hatch. 
* You're not gonna like this, mate. 
* Cry about it. 
* Well, well. Look what we have here.
Sneaking
* Eat it. 
* The hammer's gonna fall. 
* Say bye-bye. 
* Want another? 
* Poor fucker. 
* Need to learn the hard way? 
* Open up. 
* Down the hatch. 
* You're not gonna like this, mate. 
* Cry about it. 
* Well, well. Look what we have here. 
* You shouldn't have tried me.
===Hiding===
Out of combat
* Stealth mode: activated.
* Like a vandal.
* Let's turn down the fire.
* Shh...
* Shadows don't suit me.
* Time for a soft touch.
* You can't see me.
* Invisible me.
* I feel like a rothé in a tea shop.
* Steady...
* I've got this.
* Not used to lying low.
In combat
* Get down!
* They won't spot me now.
* Quiet as silence.
* Can't see me.
* Don't look!
* Oh yeah.
* Slick.
* Shht!
* Here I go...
* Invisible.
* Born for this.
* Boom! Here I go.
=== Utility actions===
Referred in game devnotes as taking an action like casting Identify, Freedom of Movement, etc. Same lines for Out of Combat, Combat and Sneaking
* One, two. 
* Hup. 
* Ought to do it. 
* My little trick. 
* Got it. 
* Go on. 
* Easy as. 
* This'll help. 
* Good idea, Karlach. 
* That's it. 
* Easy. 
* Handy.
===Helping party member===
Reactions differ depending not only on current situation (Combat/Out of combat/Sneaking), but also on Karlach's relationship towards character
====Helping unconscious====
Relationship	Out of combat	Sneaking	In combat
Negative 	
* Come on. 
* On your feet. 
* You done? 
* The drama. 
* Soldier. 
* Rally. 
* You're fine. 
* Oh no. 
* Let's go. 
* Atta boy. 
* You. Up. 
* You're all right.	
* Come on. 
* On your feet. 
* You done? 
* The drama. 
* Soldier. 
* You're fine.	
* Come on. 
* On your feet. 
* You done? 
* The drama. 
* Soldier. 
* Rally. 
* You're fine. 
* Oh no. 
* Let's go. 
* Atta boy. 
* You. Up. 
* You're all right. 
* Heads up. 
* Let's go. 
* Scarlet. 
* You done?
Neutral 	
* Hang on. 
* This'll help. 
* On your feet. 
* You all right? 
* Come on, soldier. 
* You can do it. 
* Let's go. 
* No time for that. 
* Knock knock. 
* C'mon. 
* You napping? 
* You alive?	
* Hang on. 
* This'll help. 
* On your feet. 
* You all right? 
* Come on, soldier. 
* Knock knock.	
* Hang on. 
* This'll help. 
* On your feet. 
* You all right? 
* Come on, soldier. 
* You can do it. 
* Let's go. 
* No time for that. 
* Knock knock. 
* C'mon. 
* You napping? 
* You alive? 
* None left behind. 
* Take my hand! 
* Ready for more? 
* Together!
Positive 	
* I've got you. 
* Let me help. 
* On your feet. 
* You all right? 
* Come on, soldier. 
* You can do it. 
* Together. 
* Oh no! 
* Rally! 
* C'mon. 
* Steady on. 
* You're all right.	
* I've got you. 
* Let me help. 
* On your feet. 
* You all right? 
* You can do it. 
* Together.	
* I've got you. 
* Let me help. 
* On your feet. 
* You all right? 
* Come on, soldier. 
* You can do it. 
* Together. 
* Oh no! 
* Rally! 
* C'mon. 
* Steady on. 
* You're all right. 
* Not without you. 
* Take my hand! 
* Ready for round two? 
* Together!
Romantic 	
* I've got you. 
* Let me help. 
* Come on, darling. 
* Are you all right? 
* I have you. 
* Together now. 
* Not without you. 
* I'm here. 
* Won't leave you. 
* Take my hand! 
* Ready? 
* There we go.	
* I've got you. 
* Let me help. 
* Come on, darling. 
* Are you all right? 
* I have you. 
* Together now.	
* I've got you. 
* Let me help. 
* Come on, darling. 
* Are you all right? 
* I have you. 
* Together now. 
* Not without you. 
* I'm here. 
* Won't leave you. 
* Take my hand! 
* Ready? 
* There we go. 
* Up, love. 
* That's it. 
* All better now. 
* Well done.
====Helping restrained====
Relationship	Out of combat	Sneaking	In combat
Negative 	
* Come on then. 
* Enough of that. 
* There. 
* This should help. 
* Done? 
* You're all right. 
* Move. 
* Stop that. 
* All right. 
* Go on then. 
* Let's go. 
* Move it.	
* Come on then. 
* Enough of that. 
* There. 
* Done? 
* Move. 
* Stop that.	
* All right. 
* Come on then. 
* Enough of that. 
* There. 
* This should help. 
* Done? 
* You're all right. 
* Move.
Neutral 	
* I'll help you. 
* Let's get you out. 
* Stuck no more. 
* Heave ho! 
* Allow me. 
* I've got it. 
* Get you moving. 
* Be free! 
* Hngh… 
* Move your feet! 
* How about now? 
* I'm here.	
* I'll help you 
* How about now? 
* Stuck no more. 
* Heave ho! 
* Allow me. 
* Be free!	
* How about now? 
* I'll help you 
* Stuck no more. 
* Heave ho! 
* Allow me. 
* I've got it. 
* Get you moving. 
* Be free!
Positive 	
* I'll help you. 
* Let's get you out. 
* Stuck no more. 
* Heave ho! 
* Let me. 
* I've got you. 
* Be free! 
* Hngh... 
* That should do it. 
* I'm here. 
* How's that? 
* Move your feet!	
* I'll help you. 
* Let's get you out. 
* Stuck no more. 
* Heave ho! 
* Let me. 
* I've got you.	
* I'll help you. 
* Let's get you out. 
* Stuck no more. 
* Heave ho! 
* Let me. 
* I've got you. 
* Be free! 
* Hngh…
Romantic 	
* Does this help? 
* How about now? 
* Can you move? 
* I'll save you. 
* I've got this. 
* Free now? 
* So stiff! 
* How's this? 
* Poor love. 
* I'm here. 
* Won't leave you. 
* Let's fix this.	
* Does this help? 
* How about now? 
* Can you move? 
* I'll save you. 
* I've got this. 
* Free now?	
* Let's fix this. 
* Won't leave you. 
* I'm here. 
* Poor love. 
* How's this? 
* So stiff! 
* Free now? 
* I've got this.
===Healing and buffing===
 Casting a buff (same for Out of Combat, In combat and Sneaking)
Negative	Neutral	Positive	Romantic
* Lucky you. 
* Brace yourself. 
* Hmph. 
* Fine. 
* Happy? 
* All right.	
* Let me help. 
* Nice trick, eh? 
* This'll help. 
* Catch! 
* You've got this. 
* For you.	
* Here you go, soldier! 
* Team! 
* I know what you need. 
* You but better! 
* Nice, right? 
* Go on!	
* Here, honey. 
* Even better. 
* Star. 
* Gorgeous. 
* For you. 
* Good team, us…
 Healing a party member (same for Out of Combat, In combat and Sneaking)
Negative	Neutral	Positive	Romantic
* Hold still. 
* Fine. 
* Let me do it. 
* Hang on. 
* I've got this. 
* Don't move.	
* I've got you. 
* Hold still. 
* This'll cure you. 
* Here comes Mama Karlach. 
* Boom! 
* Here you go.	
* Hold still, soldier! 
* Hey, catch this! 
* I've got you, soldier! 
* Check this out, soldier! 
* Let me help you! 
* We're in this together.	
* Let me take a look at that. 
* You're not looking well. 
* I can put you to rights. 
* Poor thing - let me help. 
* I've got you. 
* Let's fix you up, my love.
===Talking to another character===
Relationship	Out of combat	Sneaking
Negative 	
* Hey. 
* C'mon. 
* I need to talk. 
* Ahem. 
* Scuse. 
* A word. 
* Listen up. 
* I'm butting in. 
* You've got time, right? 
* Hi. 
* Prick up your ears. 
* Ugh.	
* Hey. 
* I need to talk. 
* Ahem. 
* Scuse. 
* A word. 
* Listen up.
Neutral 	
* Heya. 
* Lend an ear? 
* Time for a natter. 
* Ahem. 
* Scuse. 
* Herman, is that you? 
* Karlach incoming. 
* Boo! 
* Need a word. 
* Listen. 
* Hey. 
* Need a word.	
* Lend an ear? 
* Ahem. 
* Scuse. 
* Karlach incoming. 
* Surprise! 
* Boo!
Positive 	
* Heya! 
* Lend an ear? 
* Let's chat. 
* Ahem. 
* Scuse me. 
* A word, please. 
* Can I get a minute? 
* Hey! 
* Mind if I butt in? 
* Got time for ol' Karlach? 
* Here I am. 
* There you are.	
* Heya! 
* Lend an ear? 
* Let's chat. 
* Ahem. 
* Scuse me. 
* A word, please.
Romantic 	
* Hey you. 
* Got a little time? 
* Can we chat? 
* Hey there. 
* Gods, you're cute. 
* Got time for me, darling? 
* Mind if I get closer? 
* Hey darling. 
* There you are. 
* Sigh! 
* I've got butterflies. 
* Do I look all right?	
* Hey you. 
* Can we chat? 
* Hey there. 
* Gods, you're cute. 
* I've got butterflies. 
* There you are.
====Refusing to talk====
Being a player's companion 
General:
* Not now.
* Maybe later.
* No time for chat just now.
* I'm a bit busy at the moment. We'll talk later.
In Nightsong’s Prison:
* Not now - Shadowfelling. 
* Let's chat later. Got to keep my wits about me.
* Focus for the minute - we'll be out of here soon.
In Last Light Inn under siege:
* Talk later - we need to see this through first. 
Assault Moonrise:
* What say we kill the big bad Ketheric first? 
* Let's just get to the end of this in one piece.
* Talk later - cultists to smash.
Being another player's companion 
* Hey. Bye.
* Sorry, I've already got a best friend.
* Sorry, I don't have any change.
* I'll have to admire you from afar.
===Health and rest===
 
====Downed in combat==== 
* Help me.
* Everything's going dark.
* This isn't the way.
* No! I won't go!
* Not yet. Please.
* Heal me, please!
* I'm burnt out.
====On character death==== 
* Player: You're not dying. Not on my watch.
* Player (Dark Urge): Hang on - I won't allow this. You aren't dead, got it?
* Astarion: Astarion, you leech, you can't die like this!
* Gale: Gale! Come on, magic man, hang on!
* Lae'zel: On your feet, soldier! That's an order!
* Shadowheart: C'mon, Fringe, back up with you! 
* Wyll: WYLL! NO!
* Halsin: Halsin! Hang on! Please!
* Minthara: On your feet, Minthara! Today's not your day.
* Jaheira: Fuck no. Not Jaheira.
* Minsc: Oh, no you don't, baldy. On your feet!
===Interacting with environment===
* (The globe)
** Where should we go next?
** What a world.
** Round and round.
** Let's see, where's Faerûn.
** Big.
* (The astrolabe)
** Wouldn't mind knowing what else is out there.
** No thanks, I'm happy where I'm at.
** Makes me dizzy. Feet planted firmly on Faerûn, please.
* (The telescope) Big shiny eye.
* (Small hole)
** Yeah, maybe if I was half the size.
** No chance.
** Maybe if I were a halfling.
* (Tiny hole)
** That's for someone teeny-tiny, not biggy-biggy.
** Not a chance I'd fit.
** Maybe if I was a quarter of the size.
====Identified a mimic====
* Come out, come out, little mimic...
====Surprised by mimic====
* Another mimic! Aw, look at all those teeth.
* A mimic! Aww, baby!
====Looking into a mirror====
* Hey, good lookin'.
* Aw, me.
* Check out those arms.
* Hey, girl.
* Cute.
====Interacting with an item====
Referred in game devnotes as using something like a button, a lever or a book. Same for Out of combat, Sneaking and In combat
* Let me at it. 
* What do we have here? 
* Yeah? 
* All right! 
* What is it? 
* On it. 
* Let's see. 
* Here goes.
====Taking an item====
Same for Out of combat, Sneaking and In combat
* Ooh! 
* What's this? 
* For me? 
* Nice. 
* Huh. 
* Gimme. 
* Hello. 
* Hm.
====Can't use an item====
Out of combat
* No joy.
* Nope.
* C'mon...
* Argh!
In combat
* Not now.
* Not during a fight.
* Other things on my mind, thanks.
* Let's finish this fight first.
====Opening a container/ Empty crate====
Same for Out of combat, Sneaking and In combat
* Hello? 
* Open up. 
* Hm? 
* Yo! 
* Lookie. 
* Aha! 
* And? 
* Yoink!
An empty crate
* Nothing?
* Damn.
* No joy.
* Hello in there?
* (snivel) Disappointing.
====Found a locked item====
Something that can be unlocked from elsewhere
* Nope. Maybe there's some other way to open it.
* Locked out. Maybe I can get it open another way.
* Let me look around. Might be something that'll help me crack this thing.
* Gotta be something around here to unlock this thing.
====Found an inactive item====
Something that can be activated from elsewhere
* Hm. Must activate somewhere else.
* Now, how do I get this moving?
* Doesn't work. Must be a button or something nearby.
* Nope. Maybe it turns on somewhere else.
====Picking a lock====
Out of combat
* Shouldn't be too hard. 
* Can't I just break it. 
* Fiddly things. 
* C'mon… 
* To the left and… 
* Almost… 
* Should do… 
* Open up.
Sneaking
* Shouldn't be too hard. 
* Can't I just break it. 
* Fiddly things. 
* C'mon… 
* To the left and… 
* Almost… 
* Should do… 
* Open up.
In combat
* Shouldn't be too hard. 
* Can't I just break it. 
* Fiddly things. 
* C'mon… 
* To the left and… 
* Almost…
====Pickpocketing====
Out of combat
* Mine. 
* Don't mind if I do. 
* Shh... 
* Don't tell. 
* Easy does it. 
* A little off the top. 
* Foxy. 
* Heehee.
Sneaking
* Mine. 
* Don't mind if I do. 
* Shh... 
* Don't tell. 
* Easy does it. 
* A little off the top. 
* Foxy. 
* Heehee.
Combat
* Mine. 
* Don't mind if I do. 
* Shh... 
* Don't tell. 
* Easy does it. 
* A little off the top.
====Successfully picking a pocket====
Sneaking
* Haha! 
* Yes! 
* Victory. 
* Good thievin'. 
* Success! 
* Wheyy! 
* Yeah! 
* Oh yeah. 
* Fingerly. 
* Monster. 
* Hells yes. 
* Thank you!
In combat
* Haha! 
* Yes! 
* Victory. 
* Wheyy! 
* Success! 
* Oh yeah. 
====Dipping Weapon====
Out of combat
* Dunk it, shoot it. 
* Hehehe. 
* A bit extra. 
* Clever alchemy. 
* Potiony. 
* Soak it up. 
Sneaking
* Tasty. 
* Soak it up. 
* Potiony. 
* Clever alchemy. 
* A bit extra. 
* Hehehe.
In combat
* Dunk it, shoot it. 
* Hehehe. 
* A bit extra. 
* Clever alchemy. 
* Potiony. 
* Soak it up. 
===Successful rolls===
Investigation
* What's this?
* Gotcha.
* He-llo.
* What's that now?
* C'mere you.
Spotted a trap (Investigation)
* Place is trapped.
* Someone's rigged this place to the teeth.
* Go lightly; I spot a trap.
Spotted a trap (Perception)
* Easy - this place is hungry for blood.
* This'll be fun.
* A trap! Time to dance.
* Hot foot, hot foot - place is trapped.
===Camp followers===
==== Throwing Scratch's ball after he is dismissed ====
* Better get it myself.
* Poor Scratch is all worn out.
* I shouldn't tease our boy.
* Fella needs a little shut-eye.
==== Throwing Scratch's ball after his death ====
* I miss my dog.
* Why am I doing this to myself?
* Scratch should be here. With his family.
* Here, pup.
==== Throwing Boo ====
* Do a somersault!
* Fly free, land hard, Boo!
== At the Epilogue party ==
Greeting (always the same)
* Hells yes! You're HERE!
Feeling the player's ghost
* All right, who's acting the clown?
* Ah! What was that?
==== If remained a tiefling ====
* I could eat a beholder - what's cooking?
* Ah. It smells so good here!
* No doubt about it - the engine is cooking hotter here. Damn.
* It's just so godsdamned beautiful here.
==== If turned into an illithid ====
* What a lovely occasion this is.
* Mustn't think about any of local brains. Far too tempting.
* Ah, a pity mutton chops no longer hold any temptation.
* Thought I'm going to get very hungry very soon.
== Location Remarks ==
=== Prologue ===
=== Act One === 
=== Act Two === 
=== Act Three === 
== Party Banter ==
=== ===
(While in plains)
* Karlach: Hahaha. Ha!
* Astarion: What's so funny? You haven't got some laughing curse, have you?
* Karlach: I really made it out of Avernus. It's incredible.
* Astarion: All right, just keep it down. We're conspicuous enough without your hyena call.
(At Forest)
* Astarion: Biting flies, midges - shouldn't nature be beautiful and serene? It looks so nice in the Upper City parks.
* Karlach: Upper City, huh? Swish. Never spent much time there myself.
* Astarion: I'll happily take you. If we survive this bugs' banquet.
* Karlach: Sounds good. I've always been curious what a patriar loo looks like.
(At Sunlit Wetlands)
* Astarion: Transforming into a mind flayer might have its perks. At least then I could float over this muck.
* Karlach: Not one for roughing it, I see.
* Astarion: Wallowing in filth is for pigs and children, my dear.
* Karlach: Pigs, children, and people with a little bit of grit.
(At Grymforge)
* Karlach: Ho. He-llo! Hey!
* Astarion: So... are you greeting invisible beings or just losing your mind?
* Karlach: The echoes - listen! They're coming from three directions!
* Astarion: Losing your mind it is! Probably the tadpole - the weirdest things seem to be...
(Near Rosymorn Monastery)
* Astarion: Gods, how are we not there yet? My feet are killing me.
* Karlach: Want me to carry you?
* Astarion: Oh, darling, would you?
* Karlach: Sure! If you promise to swap once I get tired.
* Astarion: Please, I can barely manage my pack - you'd kill me.
(At Last Light Inn Graveyard)
* Astarion: The graveyard's ancient, but the graves are fresh.
* Karlach: Feeling at home?
* Astarion: I haven't set foot in a graveyard since I became a spawn, thank you. Vampires are nothing like those other undead.
* Karlach: True. I've never heard a mummy complain about a wrinkled doublet. Or sour wine.
(At Rivington)
* Karlach: Nice to be in a crowd of normal people for once.
* Astarion: Really? I prefer my company extraordinary.
* Karlach: Aww, thanks.
* Astarion: Don't thank me, thank Gortash.
* Karlach: Excuse you. I didn't need that prick to make me who I am.
* Astarion: You're right, of course. Forgive me.
* Karlach: All good, fangs.
(At Baldur's Mouth)
* Astarion: Probably best if I keep a low profile. They used to know me all too well in the Elfsong.
* Karlach: Wonder if our paths ever crossed in the before-times. Were you always so sneaky?
* Astarion: I haven't survived for two centuries by being reckless. And I hope to survive at least two more.
* Karlach: Yeah yeah, don't rub it in.
(At Grey Harbour Docks)
* Karlach: Can you swim, Astarion?
* Astarion: I'm... not sure, honestly. It's been a couple of hundred years.
* Karlach: You're missing out! Loved it as a kid. This water looks nasty as hell, though.
* Astarion: Well, it's not called 'Grey Harbour' for nothing.
(At Felogyr's Fireworks)
* Karlach: Oh man! WHIZBANGS!
* Astarion: Keep calm, Karlach. One bad flare and you could blow this whole place.
* Karlach: (Oh man! Whizbangs!)
* Astarion: Better.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 1 romance scene)
* Karlach: Hey. What's on your mind, Astarion? You seemed a million miles away just then.
* Astarion: Hmm? Oh, I was just pondering that heart of yours.
* Astarion: There were times I would've been thrilled if everyone who put their hands on me burst into flames.
* Karlach: I'd trade you if I could.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 2 romance scene)
* Astarion: So the more you cool down, the more your love life heats up?
* Karlach: Seems that way! But I'm a bit out of practice, to be honest.
* Astarion: I'm sure it'll all come back to you. You'll be as depraved as the rest of us in no time.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Astarion: I hear you were spotted being 'normal' in the Singing Lute, Karlach. Are you feeling all right?
* Karlach: Seemed like the right thing to do. I've never really tried 'normal' before.
* Astarion: And? How did you find the quiet life?
* Karlach: It was nice. It was really nice.
* Astarion: I never thought I'd see the day - our champion of the Hells has gone soft.
* Karlach: Maybe I have. Finally.
(If the player is romancing Astarion; after act 1 romance scene)
* Karlach: I never was a sucker for a smooth-talker, but I admit, Astarion, you're pretty slick.
* Astarion: And you're rather the opposite of slick. Do you have a point?
* Karlach: I was just being nice.
* Astarion: Step one of starting a conversation: think before you speak.
* Karlach: Never was my strong suit.
(If the player is romancing Astarion; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: Sorry if this is rude, but... can vampires fall in love?
* Astarion: What a preposterous question. Vampires can do anything you can do, and a damn sight better.
* Karlach: Sunbathe? Swim?
* Astarion: All right, there are a few limited exceptions.
* Karlach: Good to know love is on the table though.
* Astarion: It is. Though if the table is laden with good wine and meat, love is often left to rot with the salad leaves.
(If the player is romancing Astarion, and Astarion stayed a spawn)
* Karlach: So our vamp isn't so heartless after all.
* Astarion: Rich of you to talk about someone else's heart, Karlach.
* Astarion: But I must admit, my chest has been feeling a touch lighter recently.
* Karlach: It suits you beautifully.
* Astarion: Yes, most things do.
(If the player is romancing Astarion, and Astarion became an ascendant)
* Karlach: You know, Astarion, I'm not sure I can trust you anymore. You're... different. A bit scary, to be honest.
* Astarion: I have one person who trusts me completely. That's enough for me.
* Karlach: Treat them right, or you'll have me to answer to.
* Karlach: I can whittle up a good stake in no time if the mood takes me.
=== ===
(While in plains)
* Gale: I don't suppose you've any clue where we are in relation to Waterdeep?
* Karlach: From this distance between Elturel and Baldur's Gate, I'd say... a long way away.
* Gale: Ah. That will make getting word to my mother rather tricky.
* Gale: No matter - what she doesn't know can't hurt her. Not at this distance, anyway.
(At Forest)
* Gale: Nothing like a brisk stroll through the forest to invigorate the spirit.
* Karlach: I was just thinking the same thing, but less poetically.
* Gale: And without so much as a stirring from our tadpoles.
* Karlach: A girl could get used to this.
(At Blighted Village)
* Karlach: Looks like this town was ransacked - by soldiers, if my eyes don't deceive me.
* Gale: Quite cruelly, too.
* Karlach: Must've been an awful day for the people who lived here.
* Gale: If nothing else, I hope it was a mercifully short one.
(In the Underdark)
* Karlach: Just when I was getting used to the sky again...
* Gale: Fear not, Karlach. Sun, moon and stars will still be there waiting for us.
* Karlach: Meanwhile, this place is pretty spectacular, isn't it?
* Gale: No book or painting could ever do its strange beauty justice. But perhaps our stories might, when we return to the surface.
(At Grymforge)
* Gale: The architects who built this must have been remarkable. A pity their vision didn't stand the test of time.
* Karlach: All's not lost. I mean, just look at this place.
* Gale: You've quite the knack for finding the bright side of things, haven't you?
* Karlach: Hope keeps you going.
(Near Rosymorn Monastery)
* Karlach: Man, adventuring is thirsty work.
* Gale: There used to be a monastery in this region known for producing a wonderful ale.
* Karlach: That sounds like heaven! Wait. Used to?
* Gale: Oh, yes - long ruined, I'm afraid. No chance of a frothing pitcher awaiting us there, but still - at least your thirst for knowledge is quenched.
* Karlach: Ugh.
(On the road to Shadow-Cursed Lands)
* Gale: Do you feel that? A darkness, pulling at the strands of the Weave.
* Karlach: You'll still be able to do your wizard thing, though, right?
* Gale: Of course, but that doesn't make the shadows less dangerous.
* Karlach: Joy.
(At Shadow-Cursed Lands Forest)
* Karlach: Doing all right, Gale?
* Gale: Oh, you know... Still alive and kicking, despite being surrounded on all sides by an endless manifestation of darkness and decay...
* Karlach: I feel it too. Here if you need a pick-me-up.
(At Last Light Inn - Cellar Shrine)
* Gale: A hidden shrine, dedicated to the Moon Maiden herself. Even amidst this darkness, Selunites are stubborn enough to cling on.
* Karlach: Pretty beautiful, isn't it?
(At The Waning Moon)
* Karlach: Huh. A brewery. Why does Reithwin Ale ring a bell?
* Gale: It was known to be quite the tipple - a cask or two still exists, if you know the right alekeep...
* Karlach: You must have good taste. Not me. Can't afford it.
* Gale: A common misconception. Even the simplest of flavours are elevated by the choice to appreciate them. Don't deny yourself such pleasures.
(At Reithwin Tollhouse)
* Karlach: Whoa! Almost slipped there.
* Gale: You wouldn't be the first, I'd wager. It's been some time since these walkways felt the carpenter's hammer.
* Karlach: You gonna catch me if I eat a brick?
* Gale: With my reflexes? I'd catch you before you so much as stubbed a toe.
(At Gauntlet of Shar)
* Gale: Even shaped by shadow as it is, Sharran architecture has a kind of beauty to it.
* Karlach: Beautifully intimidating. This place was meant to scare people into submission.
* Gale: There you go, cutting right through the ephemera to the heart of the matter. Your finest quality, I think.
* Karlach: And here I thought I rubbed you the wrong way.
* Gale: Nothing wrong with a bit of friction now and then. You help me keep my mind sharp.
* Karlach: Aw. Thanks, pal. I think.
(Approaching Moonrise Towers)
* Karlach: Ready to enter the belly of the beast?
* Gale: It's the stairs I'm dreading. I shall close my eyes, and pretend I'm climbing my own, far superior tower in Waterdeep.
* Karlach: In that case, welcome home.
(At Moonrise Towers Docks)
* Karlach: We're not taking a boat to Baldur's Gate, right?
* Gale: And give the Absolute free reign to use us as target practice from the banks? I think not.
* Karlach: Phew. My mum always said the Chionthar was unlucky.
(At Mind Flayer Colony)
* Gale: It strikes me that, for a mind flayer colony, there are remarkably few mind flayers about the place...
* Karlach: Squiddies have gone to war, is my guess.
* Gale: On the Absolute's behalf? Now there's an alliance I'd have been quite happy without.
(At The Blushing Mermaid)
* Karlach: Man, it's good to be home. First round on who?
* Gale: She who thirsts buys drinks the first.
* Karlach: You won't pin me down with a rhyme, wizard!
* Gale: She who declines gets the worst of the wines.
(At Sorcerous Sundries)
* Gale: Look around you. Indulge your curiosity. Sorcerous Sundries is the finest purveyor of magical miscellany for miles around.
* Karlach: Where's the axes?
* Gale: What they sell is far more precious than mere sword or shield. They sell knowledge, ingenuity, the wisdom of mages past.
* Karlach: [yawning] Sounds like more your thing than mine.
(At Felogyr's Fireworks)
* Karlach: Oof. Karlach and explosives, not a good mix.
* Gale: You and I both. Let's just stay very calm, very serene. The last thing we need is to set this place off.
(At The Counting House)
* Gale: They say wealth offers a form of magic. Alas, it's one I've rarely dabbled in.
* Karlach: Nor I. Never had more than a few coppers in the city, and any soul coins in Avernus went straight to Zariel.
* Gale: Make no mistake. Souls are sold for coins up here as well. All too cheaply, in most cases.
(At Danthelon's Dancing Axe)
* Karlach: Wouldn't mind a dancing axe of my own.
* Gale: A simple movement charm wouldn't be too hard to apply to such an object. I could conjure one up for you if you like?
*Karlach: Yes! I like!
* Gale: Very well then. Once the city is saved, Karlach's Kinetic Cleaver will be first on my list.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 1 romance scene)
* Gale: You know, Karlach, there are other ways to express love beyond run-of-the-mill physicality...
* Karlach: Ugh. Are you going to try and teach me about exceptional uses for a mage hand or what?
* Gale: Actually, I was thinking of poetry.
* Karlach: Oops, sorry. But... now that I think of it... is mage hand especially hard to learn?
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 2 romance scene)
* Gale: I've always felt flames to be a rather perfect expression of love, Karlach.
* Gale: Passionate, primal, capable of bestowing the most life-affirming comfort, or inflicting the profoundest damage.
* Karlach: That's... pretty nice. Never thought about it like that. But now I will.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Gale: Am I to understand that you are in love now, Karlach?
* Karlach: I sure am. If there's hope for me there's hope for anyone.
(If the player is romancing Gale; after act 1 romance scene)
* Gale: Karlach... a hypothetical question for you:
* Gale: If someone - not me, of course - detected a hint of romantic interest in them from another, unnamed individual, what might that someone do about it?
* Karlach: Whoever it is, just talk to them, Gale. And leave out the hypotheticals.
* Gale: Talking. Right. I'm good at that.
(If the player is romancing Gale; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: So, Gale - got any book recommendations for me?
* Gale: You can read?!
* Karlach: Very funny. Yes - I can read. School put me off big boring tomes. Sometimes I wonder what I'm missing.
* Gale: Say no more - I'll find the perfect book for you. I might even lend it to you from my library in Waterdeep.
* Karlach: Ooh! Something with magic, please. And no devils.
(If the player is romancing Gale; after act 3 romance scene)
* Karlach: How's the orb treating you, Gale?
* Gale: Oh, quite well as a matter of fact. Since it was stabilised, it's been humming along nicely.
* Gale: I have noticed one adverse side-effect. I seem to be losing hair in some, er, unexpected places.
* Karlach: I can only imagine.
=== ===
(While in plains)
* Karlach: Is this your first time on the Sword Coast, Lae'zel?
* Lae'zel: Yes. It is much more... lively... than the githyanki slates led me to believe.
* Karlach: Just wait till you see Baldur's Gate. You'll never want to leave.
(While in plains)
* Lae'zel: Smell that? Blood. This whole plain reeks of it.
* Karlach: That'll wake you up of a fine day, won't it.
* Lae'zel: I do not need awakening. My senses are sharp as steel.
(At Forest)
* Karlach: Ahh, smell that? Fresh forest air.
* Lae'zel: I smell only fear - the fear of cowards lying in wait for an ambush.
* Karlach: You can take a day off once in a while, Lae'zel.
* Lae'zel: I do not take days off. I'd even forego sleep, if such a thing were feasible. The one advantage an elf holds over a githyanki.
(In the Underdark)
* Karlach: Beautiful. Lethal. The Underdark is everything I thought it'd be.
* Lae'zel: And I. This environ seems worthy of a githyanki warrior's estimation.
* Karlach: Ah, to be deemed worthy by the great Lae'zel of Crèche K'liir.
* Lae'zel: Continue as you have, Karlach, and you will achieve the same.
(At Rosymorn Monastery)
* Karlach: What a sight. We should stop for a nice little lunch, take it all in.
* Lae'zel: Is the worm gnawing at your grey matter? We must find a crèche and be purified.
* Karlach: True. Fine. First, purify the tadpole, then a little lunch.
(On the road to Shadow-Cursed Lands)
* Karlach: Lae'zel, do you want to talk about what happened at the crèche?
* Lae'zel: Trust me. You'll know when I'm ready to discuss it.
* Karlach: Fair enough. But if you change your mind...
* Lae'zel: It is not a matter of mind. It is a matter of faith - and I have been put to the test.
(At Shadow-Cursed Lands Forest)
* Karlach: Do I see light? Or am I delusional?
* Lae'zel: Just a mirage. There's not a spot in sight that the gloom hasn't touched.
* Karlach: Damn, you're right. The eyes see what the heart wants.
(At Ruined Battlefield)
* Lae'zel: Bones. Rusted weapons. A great battle was fought here.
* Karlach: An extra vicious one, I think. No one buried their dead.
* Lae'zel: Exactly the sort of battle I live to fight. And the sort made even more thrilling with a hot-hearted tiefling at my side.
(At Mind Flayer Colony)
* Karlach: Look at all this mucus. Wonder if our nautiloid came from down here.
* Lae'zel: It's a possibility. This is no mere mind flayer colony, but an entire ghaik bastion.
* Karlach: I'm ready for the goo.
(At Wyrm's Rock Fortress)
* Lae'zel: A kith'rak's red dragon would have this place down around Gortash's ears in moments.
* Karlach: I'd love to see that. I've always hated this place.
* Lae'zel: It will be far more satisfying to plunge a blade into Gortash myself than to pick through his ashes.
(At Wyrm's Rock Fortress)
* Karlach: You know, I've always kind of hated this place. Such ado about a damned bridge.
* Lae'zel: It's just a bridge. Is it really worth all that ire?
* Karlach: C'mon, isn't there something you hate for no good reason?
* Lae'zel: Hm. I dislike owls. Their hyper-mobile necks are quite disconcerting.
* Karlach: You know what, Lae? I couldn't agree more.
(At Lady Jannath's Estate)
* Karlach: Phew! Wouldn't mind shacking up in a place like this.
* Lae'zel: Yes - and quite an attractive target for githyanki raiders. They'd plunder the village and fly off with the spoils.
* Karlach: What are you, pirates?
* Lae'zel: To my people, all the planes are a vast garden to be weeded and picked.
* Karlach: Well tell your mates to keep their hoes out of Baldur's Gate.
(At House of Hope)
* Karlach: Damn. I swore I'd never come back to the Hells, and here I am.
* Lae'zel: Fate has a way of pulling us along with or without our approval.
* Karlach: Escaping fate happens to be my speciality.
(If the player is romancing Lae'zel; after act 1 romance scene)
* Karlach: So githyanki undergarments. Very fashionable.
* Lae'zel: The under-harnesses are often used for strapping oneself onto a red dragon.
* Karlach: Fashion and function. You lot really have it all figured out.
(If the player is romancing Lae'zel; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: Lae'zel, you're actually glowing.
* Lae'zel: It is the sheen of the soldier's sweat on my brow.
* Karlach: The soldier's sweat? Or the lover's?
* Lae'zel: Kain'cha... Speak on it no further.
(If the player is romancing Lae'zel; after act 3 romance scene)
* Karlach: It's good to see you smiling, Lae'zel.
* Lae'zel: A momentary spasm of the jaw. But perhaps there is cause.
* Lae'zel: Even in this dark hour, there are some things to take heart in.
* Karlach: Couldn't have said it better myself.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 1 romance scene)
* Lae'zel: Your years in the Hells have made you a fierce warrior, Karlach.
* Karlach: Fierce in battle, maybe a bit naive in... everything else.
* Lae'zel: In that way, you are like many a young githyanki - wise to the ways of battle, if not to the wider world.
* Karlach: Makes sense. And how are you getting on out here in the world?
* Lae'zel: Mindfully and meticulously.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 2 romance scene)
* Lae'zel: Karlach, were there others of Zariel's warriors who bore the infernal engine?
* Karlach: I was the first - not the last. But most didn't survive the process.
* Karlach: The others were all devilkin. I think I was the only lucky winner from Faerûn.
* Lae'zel: You were stronger than the others.
* Karlach: Lucky me.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Lae'zel: A dinner date. At first your request confused me. But then, I became curious...
* Karlach: Think you might like to try it for yourself some time?
* Lae'zel: It sounds terribly understimulating.
* Karlach: Depends on the company.
* Lae'zel: Well. Good thing for us both I make for riveting company.
=== ===
(At Forest)
* Karlach: Ahh. Flowers, leaves, grass. Can't beat it.
* Shadowheart: I was raised in the city - I'm more used to feeling cobblestones underfoot than grass and fallen leaves.
* Karlach: Before I went to Avernus, I'd have agreed with you. Nothing quite like Baldur's Gate, is there?
* Shadowheart: Nothing in my recollection, anyway...
(At Blighted Village)
* Shadowheart: The whole village is falling to pieces. These goblins aren't exactly house-proud, as occupiers go...
* Karlach: Wouldn't blame the gobs. Place looks like it's been abandoned a good while.
* Karlach: But hey, maybe we can scare up a few dusty bottles of wine somewheres.
* Shadowheart: I like your way of thinking. Split any takings we find?
* Karlach: Sister, you've got a deal.
(At Sunlit Wetlands)
* Karlach: Hey! Something bit me.
* Shadowheart: Just an insect - I'm sure you'll survive. Besides, it probably figured you for a tasty treat.
* Karlach: Give me an aboleth over a midge any day.
(At Grymforge)
* Shadowheart: This place is hard to bear. I hope we're able to continue on our way before too long.
* Karlach: I know what you mean. Everyone is so... unhappy.
* Shadowheart: Oh. Well I meant more the molten rock and plunging chasms, but yes, the folk leave something to be desired as well.
* Karlach: Present company excluded, of course?
* Shadowheart: Oh hush, you. Stop fishing for compliments.
(At Rosymorn Monastery)
* Shadowheart: A remote spot for a monastery. I suppose they wanted to make sure the monks avoided temptation.
* Karlach: Yeah but look at these mountains. The height of temptation.
* Shadowheart: No, I mean more like vices. You know - pleasures of the flesh.
* Karlach: Met a loumara demon who married a mountain, though. It's a thing.
* Shadowheart: I think the thin air might be getting to you, Karlach.
(At Crèche Y'llek)
* Karlach: Gotta respect these gith. They don't fool around.
(If it is known that Shadowheart is a follower of Shar)
* Shadowheart: Oh I'm more than aware, trust me. I've had plenty of training in what to expect from them.
(If it is not known that Shadowheart is a follower of Shar)
* Shadowheart: I'll certainly be treading very carefully, trust me.
* Karlach: In that case, lead on, miss.
(On the road to Shadow-Cursed Lands)
* Shadowheart: We've had some close calls already. There could be even tougher days ahead...
* Karlach: Cheer up. It might be all downhill from here.
* Shadowheart: Meaning things will start becoming easier for us, or our situation will deteriorate from here...?
* Karlach: Exactly.
(At Reithwin Town)
* Karlach: Since you're the only one in good form out here, I'll trust you to lead the way, Shadowheart.
(If Shadowheart no longer loyal to Shar)
* Shadowheart: Actually... I've been stripped of that particular advantage. But I will forge ahead, nonetheless.
(If Shadowheart is still loyal to Shar)
* Shadowheart: It's a deal, so long as you watch my back.
* Karlach: Atta girl.
(At Mason's Guild Rebel Hideout)
* Shadowheart: I love a nice secret hideaway, don't you?
* Karlach: I mean... I guess.
* Shadowheart: You can just fill it with supplies, seal up the hidden entrance, and tuck yourself away from the world...
* Karlach: Whatever you say, squirrelheart.
(At Gauntlet of Shar)
* Karlach: Never knew Sharrans to be so... military.
* Shadowheart: It shouldn't surprise you. We have been at war with Selûne since before most of history was written. An eternal conflict, from the viewpoint of mortals...
* Shadowheart: Shar's entire creed revolves around waging war against Selûne. Imagine all the generations of mortals, sacrificed in an eternal conflict between sisters.
* Karlach: Problem with eternal wars is they never end.
* Karlach: Take it from me, a short, sharp personal vendetta is far less time-intensive.
(Approaching Moonrise Towers)
* Shadowheart: Moonrise Towers. There used to be more than one tower, of course. The other must have been destroyed.
(If Karlach has only one real eye)
* Karlach: I figured as much, what with my one good eye for seeing and fingers for counting.
(If Karlach still has both eyes)
* Karlach: I figured as much, being the proud owner of eyes.
* Karlach: ... sorry, no need for that. Must've put too much salt on my blood sausage this morning.
* Shadowheart: Not at all. Nice to be on the receiving end, now and again. Keeps me sharp.
(At Moonrise Towers)
* Karlach: I'm sweating bullets. What if I blow our cover?
* Shadowheart: Simplicity is the key to a good deception. If in doubt, try thinking less.
* Karlach: Yes ma'am.
(At Moonrise Towers Oubliette)
* Karlach: Dark enough for you, Shadowheart?
* Shadowheart: Nothing wrong with a nice subdued ambience. It can help flatter even the homeliest of faces.
* Karlach: I'll try to keep my fire a gentle throb.
(At Moonrise Towers Prison)
* Karlach: Prisoners!
* Shadowheart: More like soon-to-be tadpole residences. Every infected prisoner will just make things harder on us...
* Karlach: Let's go blast a brine pool, then.
(At Baldur's Mouth)
* Karlach: I wouldn't mind doing a little shopping in the city.
(If Shadowheart no longer loyal to Shar)
* Shadowheart: Same. I think I may have overdone it with the black and purple for, oh, my entire life? Your look serves you well though.
(If Shadowheart is still loyal to Shar)
* Shadowheart: Lady Shar teaches us to abhor superficialities like fashion... though the city does have some fine boutiques. After a new look?
* Karlach: I'm ten years behind; don't want the youths to think I'm not, you know, up with the times.
(At Bloomridge Park)
* Karlach: Huh. There's something going on here. I don't like it.
* Karlach: Careful. I smell an ambush.
* Shadowheart: Are you sure it's not the flowers you're smelling? You may be allergic.
* Shadowheart: But better safe than sorry, I suppose.
(At Morphic Pool)
* Karlach: I can tell when we're getting close to a mind flayer area because everything starts to smell purple.
* Shadowheart: That's either profoundly poetic or childishly simple. I'm going with poetic.
* Karlach: A compliment from Shadowheart! I'll put it on the shelf with the rest of my achievements.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: Hey, Shaddy, got a quick question about the best way to treat an infernal burn.
* Shadowheart: Shaddy? Really?
* Karlach: Hearty? Shadsy? Or maybe just The Fringe?
* Shadowheart: 'Shadowheart' will do just fine, thanks. Love is making you fanciful.
* Karlach: You might be right.
(If the player is romancing Shadowheart; after act 1 romance scene)
* Karlach: You look happy, Shadowheart. Like a Night Orchid in bloom.
* Shadowheart: You must be imagining it.
* Karlach: It's all over your face.
* Shadowheart: It must be all the fresh air since the crash - has me flush.
* Karlach: It looks good on you.
(If the player is romancing Shadowheart; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: So - why Night Orchids?
* Shadowheart: Well, isn't it enough that they're beautiful?
* Shadowheart: They remind me of some place - a place I can't quite remember. But I think I was happy there, wherever it was.
* Shadowheart: Sorry. I'm being silly.
* Karlach: You're cute.
(If the player is romancing Shadowheart, and Shadowheart chose Selune)
* Karlach: Must be lovely to have a swim without boiling all the fishes alive.
* Shadowheart: Sounds pleasant to swim with you. At a distance. It's usually so freezing.
* Karlach: Don't ask me to make a hot spring for you two. It might work. But I also might cook you like lobsters.
(If the player is romancing Shadowheart, and Shadowheart chose Shar)
* Karlach: To have someone who cares about you and throw them away. I don't know how you do it.
* Shadowheart: Any restriction, any tether must be shed. Surely you understand that? It is a form of freedom, if a tragic one.
* Karlach: I've had enough tragedy in my day. You have too. But Shar's got you in a chokehold.
* Shadowheart: It's called an embrace. I suppose you don't receive many.
* Karlach: Whatever.
=== ===
(At Last Light Inn, if it's protected)
* Karlach: Think the bar is open?
* Wyll: I intend to find out. But we should scout around first, see who's in need of help.
* Karlach: You're good at staying in character, I'll give you that.
(At Grand Mausoleum)
* Karlach: No shadow curse here. Wonder why.
* Wyll: Couldn't say. Maybe because an entirely different curse has befallen the tomb.
* Karlach: Always something, isn't it.
(At Gauntlet of Shar)
* Karlach: You know, even devils like a good joke. Why are Sharrans so... dour?
* Wyll: Their belief is grounded in loss. Hardly a laughing matter.
* Karlach: The loss of all joy. Sad business.
(At Rivington riverbank)
* Karlach: Care for a dip, Wyll?
* Wyll: It would be my pleasure, Karlach - once the Absolute's been crushed for good.
* Karlach: Heroics don't leave half enough time for messing.
(In the North Alleys)
* Karlach: Do I hear... music?
* Wyll: I reckon there wasn't much merry-making in the Hells.
* Karlach: You reckon right. Maybe for the best though. My singing is worse than demonic screeching.
* Wyll: Hm - perhaps your talent lies in dancing, instead?
(At Southern Docks)
* Wyll: Smell that, Karlach?
* Karlach: Uh... fish?
* Wyll: Well, yes. But also trouble.
* Karlach: Your nose is better than mine, pal.
(At The Counting House)
* Karlach: Feel that? Guards are giving us the stink-eye.
* Karlach: Think they recognise you?
* Wyll: Possibly. But I wager there's something deeper at work here.
* Karlach: Then let's go digging.
(If the player is romancing Wyll; after act 1 romance scene)
* Karlach: Couldn't find you for a while at the party. Was hoping we could regale our friends with a nice three-horned duet.
* Wyll: Ah, I just needed a moment of quiet, to think, that's all.
* Karlach: What about?
* Wyll: Wouldn't you like to know?
* Karlach: Well yeah! One thing I'll say for the Hells, the gossip is excellent. Faerûn's a funeral parlour by comparison.
(If the player is romancing Wyll; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: Used to your new look yet, Wyll? I for one think you look smashing.
* Wyll: You know, I think I am. It certainly didn't put off my - er- dance partner.
* Karlach: Ah, dance, the true language of love.
(If the player is romancing Wyll; after act 3 romance scene)
* Karlach: Seeing you happy is pretty wonderful, Wyll.
* Karlach: Two of my real friends, finding real happiness? Together? Beautiful.
* Wyll: Thank you, Karlach.
* Karlach: If you get married, I'm your celebrant. Got it?
* Wyll: As if could ever refuse you.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 1 romance scene)
* Wyll: Did Zariel know you'd be unable to touch anyone when she crammed that awful thing into your chest?
* Karlach: Thing is, I can touch devils and the like, back in Avernus. I never did, cause I'm not a masochist. But I could have.
* Wyll: Gods. I'm glad you got out of there.
* Karlach: With my new best friend on my tail the whole time. Who knew.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 2 romance scene)
* Wyll: Karlach... I know I say this every day, but I'm so glad you're here.
* Karlach: Me too!
* Wyll: And seeing you've got someone to care about now, after ten bloody years, what would you say? 'Good for you, mate.'?
* Karlach: Exactly so, your majesty.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Wyll: The fact one of your first dates is going to be one of your last... it's just not fair, Karlach.
* Karlach: I don't want to think about that. I just want to enjoy whatever comes my way.
* Wyll: You're worth more respect than every last rogue in this city. I hope you know that.
=== ===
(At Ruined Battlefield)
* Karlach: I can almost reconstruct this battle in my mind. Unfortunately.
* Halsin: At least you were not present. Grim as it is now, it was worse on the day of the battle. A vivid wound upon my memory.
* Karlach: Tsk. Poor man.
* Halsin: I was lucky - I lived, when so many did not. It would take me a day and a night to recite the names of all the friends I lost.
(At Last Light Inn Graveyard)
* Karlach: Well, well. Who's buried here?
* Halsin: Flaming Fists, Harpers, refugees, perhaps... The shadow curse has indiscriminate taste in victims.
* Karlach: May they rest in peace.
* Halsin: Peace and rest are strangers in these lands, until the shadows are banished.
(At Last Light Inn, if it's cursed)
* Halsin: All gone... devoured by the shadows. Oak Father preserve us, it's just like a hundred years ago.
* Karlach: Stay strong, bear man. We're still here.
* Halsin: We are. Yet there is a burden to being the survivor... the witness to others' tragedies. It only grows heavier with time.
(At Mason's Guild)
* Halsin: I knew one of Reithwin's head masons. She was a good woman, and strong as an ox.
* Karlach: Really? Are strong women your type, Halsin?
* Halsin: I don't discriminate against any type.
* Karlach: Truly a bear man of the people.
(At Moonrise Towers)
* Halsin: This fortress was a seat of the High Heralds, I believe. Long gone from here, of course.
* Karlach: The who now?
* Halsin: A council of intellectuals, respected throughout Faerûn - leading authorities on heraldry of course, but also history, genealogy, and diplomacy.
* Karlach: Seems like diplomacy failed, if they allowed Ketheric Thorm to take over - twice.
(At Moonrise Towers Throne Room)
(If the shadowcurse hasn't been lifted)
* Halsin: I can only hope we still find time to vanquish the curse. I can think of little else.
* Karlach: You can talk of little else too.
* Halsin: I make no apologies for knowing what is important to me.
(If the shadowcurse has been lifted)
* Halsin: We have lifted the shadow curse, but a new challenge awaits us.
* Karlach: Baldur's Gate - we can't get there soon enough.
* Halsin: I am... less anxious to find myself in a city. So removed from nature's power - I do not know how I will fare.
* Karlach: Stick with me. I'll show you around and square up if anyone bothers you.
(While assaulting Moonrise Towers)
* Karlach: Take no prisoners.
* Halsin: I doubt many will seek to surrender. But if they do... mercu costs us nothing, Karlach.
* Karlach: Nothing but the win.
(At The Lodge)
* Halsin: There is an admirable harmony to the Society of Brilliance. Beings of all sorts, united in the pursuit of intellect...
* Karlach: The pursuit of intellect. Fun.
* Halsin: Hailing from the Underdark can dampen one's sense of fun, I will admit. Down there, noises such as laughter tend to attract predators.
* Karlach: Sounds like a place I used to know...
(At The Blushing Mermaid)
* Halsin: You and I may struggle to go unnoticed in such environs, Karlach.
* Karlach: True enough. Hard to hide pretty under a bushel.
* Halsin: I meant more in terms of size. Folk of our stature can be a lure for drunkards seeking a brawl, I have found.
* Karlach: Ooh! Fun.
(At Guildhall)
* Karlach: I smell a fight brewing.
* Halsin: Then let it brew. Some radical thinkers claim that peace is a valid option, you know.
* Karlach: And miss a good barroom brawl? Not me, sir.
(At Sorcerous Sundries)
* Halsin: This place reminds me of a magpie's nest. Random baubles, doodahs, and what-have-yous, all jumbled together without a care.
* Karlach: Fun, right? Who knows what you could find.
* Halsin: Danger, going by past experience. A cursed tome. An unstable spell. A haunted poppet...
* Karlach: [In a singsongy voice] Haunted poppet, haunted poppet.
(At Morphic Pool)
* Halsin: I cannot help but feel that destiny is tightening its grip on our forward path.
* Karlach: Win or lose, we're nearly there, right?
* Halsin: Indeed. But I just wanted to take the chance to say - it has been a pleasure, Karlach.
* Karlach: The feeling's highly mutual, bear man.
(If the player is romancing Haslin in act 3)
* Karlach: You're old as sin, right Halsin? You must have lots of good stories.
* Halsin: A few. But people always warm to the most salacious chapters.
* Halsin: They forget how much I study, meditate, and as a bear - hibernate. I must have spent a hundred years or more asleep.
* Karlach: Sleep and adventure. Maybe I'll come back as a bear in some future life.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Halsin: Nature affords us few greater powers of healing than what love can provide, Karlach.
* Halsin: I was concerned that your pursuit of a cure might cloud your final days. I am glad I was wrong.
* Karlach: Me too. Even with so much at stake... in this little heart of mine, I've never been happier.
=== ===
(At Abandoned Cistern in the Lower City Sewers)
* Minthara: This place is foul. Drow would not tolerate rivers of waste flowing so close to their residences.
* Karlach: You've got slaves to manage your sanitation. Baldur's Gate doesn't. Though we do rely quite heavily on kobolds.
* Minthara: But surely the kobolds are slaves?
* Karlach: Hell no.
* Minthara: Straj. Yet one more reason to despair for the fate of this city.
(If the player is romancing Minthara; after act 2 romance scene)
* Karlach: Hey, so, what's romance like in the Underdark, Minthara?
* Minthara: In Menzoberranzan, romance is commonly a luxury enjoyed between women. Men are mostly present for propagation.
* Minthara: Here on the surface, gender does not define one's role so strictly. There are weaklings of every sort.
(If the player is romancing Minthara; after act 3 romance scene)
* Karlach: It's funny seeing you so smitten, Minthara. Didn't think you were able.
* Minthara: I took my first lover before you were a spark in your father's eye, child.
* Karlach: Go on.
* Minthara: She was a high priestess of House Vandree. Beautiful, elegant, ruthless.
* Minthara: I adored her, and had been sharing her bed for some time when the order came that she must die.
* Minthara: I stayed with her while the poison did its work, and whispered words of comfort as she slipped away.
* Karlach: Oh no.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 2 romance scene)
* Minthara: You allowed that smith to meddle with your heart, Karlach, simply so you can be touched?
* Minthara: Better to shut off the carnal desires than indulge them. They are distractions.
* Karlach: Yes, because every function comes with a handy switch.
* Karlach: Next time I'm injured, don't heal, just turn me off and on again.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Minthara: Have you ever been afraid, Karlach? Truly afraid?
* Karlach: You know how much time I spent in the hells, right? Of course I've been scared!
* Karlach: I kept on going though. Knew there'd be better days on the other side - and here they are.
=== ===
(At Steel Watch Foundry)
* Karlach: These Steel Watchers are big as hell.
* Jaheira: All the more cracks and crevices for a wild-shape to ferret into - gum up the works a little.
* Karlach: I'd give my other horn to watch that.
(At Bonecloak's Basement)
* Karlach: So, erm, Jaheira. Do you like to... that is, what do you like to do?
* Jaheira: As in... hobbies? Oh. Well... I like to play music, I suppose?
* Karlach: I'm just picturing you strumming on a harp so hard the strings snap and trying not to shriek. [Awkward laugh] What do you play?
* Jaheira: Eh. Mostly the same children's rhyme, on a battered whistle of tin. I do not get a lot of time to practise.
* Jaheira: Oh spare me the sad eyes, girl! Not every daily deed is worthy of song! Certainly none I can play.
(At Water Queen's House)
* Karlach: This place is so peaceful. Maybe I should convert.
* Jaheira: I've done my share of praying to her, though not for the cause of peace. My faith was suddenly found on choppy seas.
* Karlach: I don't know what that means.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Jaheira: You've a love-struck look about you, Karlach. Just do not let it distract you from the task ahead.
* Karlach: But what if I really enjoy being distracted from the task ahead?
* Jaheira: Bah, where is the barbarian rage? I have been learning so many colourful phrases from you, I was hoping to inspire a few more.
* Karlach: Ma'am, you've been inspiring me since I was yea high.
=== ===
* Karlach: Minsc, you come from an entire nation of berserkers. Give me some of those good Rashemaar pointers.
* Minsc: Oh. There is much to be learned. Deep breaths. Meditative trances. Strange and stinking mushrooms.
* Minsc: But Minsc could master none of this. Which made him sad. Which made him mad. Which made him the berserker you see before you.
* Karlach: Huh. Really?
* Minsc: And there is always Boo, with the needful nip when anger is slow in coming. This is not how you do it...?
(At the entrance to the Guildhall)
* Minsc: Are you familiar with the evil works of Nine-Fingers and her Guild, Karlach?
* Karlach: I've Heard of her - and everyone knows the Guild. They're not bad if you know how to work 'em.
(If Minsc has agreed to work with Nine-Fingers)
* Minsc: Hm. Boo and I, we are in need of honest berserkers to keep the Guild honest in turn. Will you show us how this 'working' is done?
* Karlach: Sure. The trick is to let them mess with you just once, and show 'em what happens. They won't try again.
(If Minsc has not agreed to work with Nine-Fingers)
* Minsc: Minsc means to do no working. When he breaks the guildmaster, it will be for the fun of it alone.
(At Undercity Ruins)
* Minsc: A dead and foul place. Only a villain would nest down in these tunnels.
* Karlach: Hang on, weren't you living in the sewer?
* Minsc: Entirely different! That was foul only in its smells, and the way our water tasted. But it was home.
* Karlach: Fair enough, buddy. Home is where the heart is, anyway.
* Minsc: Ah - in that case, home is in my pocket, nestled on soft bed of flesh and fluff.
(At Bhaal Temple)
* Karlach: What a pesthole! Can't wait to clear this place out.
* Minsc: There will be much trading of threats and insults, no doubt. But Minsc will be ready when it is time for boot to meet butt.
* Karlach: You and me both, pal.
(At Morphic Pool)
* Minsc: Karlach, this brain we go to bully - Boo has suggested it is large. Wizard-brain large? Boo-brain large?
* Karlach: Like... as many Boo-brains as a mortal mind can fathom. It's an elder brain, after all. You heard of those?
* Minsc: Of course!
* Minsc: What is an elder brain?
* Karlach: Honestly, I'm not completely sure. But I know it'll be no match for you, me, and the hamster.
(If the player is romancing Karlach; after act 3 romance scene)
* Minsc: Karlach - do I see you gazing long at Boo? You wish to have a hamster of your own, I think.
* Karlach: I wouldn't say no. But really I was thinking... how old is he, Minsc?
* Minsc: He is quite obviously in his prime. For a miniature giant space hamster.
* Karlach: And he's always looked the exact same? No chance Jaheira's been swapping him out every few years?
* Minsc: Karlach! Minsc and Boo thought better of you, than to be so concerned with looks.
==Notes==
Category:Banter