F.E.A.R.

F.E.A.R. is a simulation designed by the US Delta Force (SFOD-D) (which doesn't actually exist, remember that folks) to test the ability of some of the world's foremost soldiers to put their conventional training to use in a situation where the boundaries of reality and laws of physics are not applicable. Much like The Matrix, if you die inside F.E.A.R., you die for real. Not long after the simulation was activated, Delta Force lowered entrance specifications and began recruiting again. Also, all small girls with long black hair and red clothing were placed on the terrorist watch list and banned from appearing in dark rooms. The simulation is still running, but has evolved into a sequel which may or may not feature the Delta Force (along with Robocop), depending on the speed at which the current members of Delta Force can be transformed from a liquid back into a solid.
==Background==
The US Army, always looking for a better way to get soldiers killed without losing Republican votes, authorized the creation of a program named Project Origin to explore the possibility of creating clone soldiers under the control of a psychic commander. What could possibly go wrong? Always looking for human rights to abuse, the US Department of Defence signed off on using an eight year old girl as an experimental subject (We all know that girls with long dark hair covering most their face make excellent field officers and soldiers) . The girl, Alma, was a powerful psychic, and instead of treating her carefully they tortured, poked and prodded her until she became, quite frankly, insane. Since she was already pissed off, the Armacham scientists who had been given control of the project decided to artificially impregnate and see if they couldn't get kids with superpowers. The first child was a super-fast uber-soldier who was nigh-invincible and was worth 1000 men in a firefight. However, such a specimen had no military use and they impregnated Alma again. Harlan Wade, her father and head of the program (and a slightly worse father than an alcoholic Catholic Priest), deemed her second child a success; he had the ability to give psychic orders. This was what the military wanted, and they created and trained the "Replica's", leaving them fully armed and unguarded in a large hangar. Understandably, they foresaw no complications with placing control of a battalion of elite soldiers and heavy vehicles in the hands of a mentally unstable child. However, the second child, Paxton Fettel a cannibal that walks around with blood on his face because he and 1000 clones have no idea where to get a napkin, went completely batshit insane and used these soldiers to murder lots of Armacham personnel in an act nobody could have anticipated. It became apparent that Alma was controlling her son, who was controlling the soldiers. Armacham exercised their own control over Alma, in the form of cutting off that bitch's oxygen. She died a week later (females generally need less oxygen than men due to reduced brain activity, or so men like to convince themselves), and the facility was closed down. There are several fact based situations the director of ATC is a woman that when was told by Harlan Wade not to open the vault he was ignored. After being blunt and speaking slowly in hopes to dissuade her by calling her a "manipulating bitch" and a "fucking idiot", she did not get the message and opened the facility anyway and as usual all hell breaks lose because a woman didn't do as she was told.
==Attack of the Clones==
While Alma's physical body died, her spirit was just dandy and perfectly capable of turning human beings into soup in record time. However, her spirit was contained in the sealed facility. The director of Armacham at this point decided that the project had merit and that there was no danger in entering a facility inhabited by the insane spirit of the world's most dangerous being that they had tortured for eight years before killing. Unsurprisingly, this director was a woman. Despite Harlan Wade's best efforts to dissuade her by calling her a "manipulating bitch" and a "fucking idiot", she did not get the message and opened the facility anyway. To everybody's great surprise, the team that was sent in died. While they WERE all overweight computer nerds and may have died of natural causes, the Armacham director decided to do the smart thing and close the facility again. However, Alma's spirit was already loose, and already busy getting revenge.
==The Girl Strikes Back==
thumb|right|It takes a special kind of person to give blood: can you?
The F.E.A.R. Team consisting of Spen Jankowski, Alma's mysterious first child (but we don't know that yet, so shhh!) and Jin Sun-Kwon, are dispatched to track down Paxton Fettel, who Alma recently took control of again and who responded by activating his soldiers. They locate him, but cannot see any soldiers in the area. Apparently, hiding an entire battalion of soldiers in a few warehouses is not difficult. Two squads of Delta Force from the "Redshirt detatchment" are dispatched to assist F.E.A.R., and unpredictably, die almost immediately. Jankowski disappears, the player character gets scared by Alma a few times, and Fettel gets away.
The player is then sent to Armacham HQ where Paxton's Replica's have taken over the building. Despite Armacham's creation of Paxton Fettel, the clone army and heavy involvement in the entire situation, no correlation can be found between Paxton's invasion and Armacham itself. The F.E.A.R. Co-coordinator (since the player character is the one really in charge) labels the whole situation a plot device, and gives you two Delta Force Operatives as backup. They die immediately, and the player character spends upwards of eight hours seeing black figures across the room and some blood somewhere, shooting the absolute worst AI in the history of the planet, getting told that "Paxton Fettel has been detected nearby", and then that "Paxton Fettel got away". Apparently Jankowski's life signs are stable despite his obviously being incorporeal in his appearances as a ghost. It is believed that the definition of being "dead" has changed from "The permanent end of the life of a biological organism" to "The permanent end of life of a biological organism unless it is not witnessed by another biological organism, in which case they are still alive".
Alma's beloved son (the one she is trying to kill) then travels to the compound where Alma's body rests. He fights Paxton Fettel, who for some reason does not resist and allows the player character to kill him. It has been theorized that this is because he is French. The player then witness Harlan Wade freeing his dead daughter from her stasis chamber, decades after he tortured her for eight years and then killed her. In gratitude, Alma messes him the fuck up, splattering her father's good intentions all over the room. She now changes form, appearing as an atrophied, skeletal female corpse (see: hittable). As it was that time of month when she died, Alma is now royally pissed off and tries to kill the player. However, due to only Samuel. L. Jackson being a bigger badass and nobody being faster, the player survives, blows up the facility, and survives to get his ass kicked in the expansion. Alma also survives, but then again if dying didn't kill her, then that was to be expected.
==Return of the Jedi Point Man==
The F.E.A.R. team return in an expansion pack of the original simulation, in which a lot more Replicas are killed, Alma becomes even more powerful, Fettel comes back to life, and every other character the player met during the previous game dies. The player character is also stranded in Auburn and left for dead, and no questions are answered whatsoever. However, more Delta Force Operatives die. And when it comes down to it, that's all that matters.
==Another Point Man==
Another F.E.A.R team codenamed "Deus Ex Machina" (not to be mistaken for the song of the same name) is deployed at the same time as the original team. Over a period of six hours, this team manages to kill a lot of Replica's, lose the only member of the team that had a personality to floor-grabbing ghosts that didn't exist before, and find out absolutely nothing about Alma, ATC, Paxton or the Perseus Mandate, which was their original mission. The player character, a different Point Man who still knows martial arts and can use slow-motion (explained in the words of the developers, "because he can"), is still immune to Alma's powers. While there is no reason for her to be unable to kill him, nobody cares. He can slow down time. Delta Force reappears, except they manage to kick a reasonable amount of ass. As such, they must not really be Delta Force. Alma and Paxton Fettel make guest appearances, but are more old friends than anything else at this point, despite the new Point Man having never encountered them before. Team Deus Ex Machinima, in a storyline as confusing as this summary, also start fighting a random mercenary force for no real reason, as well as assassins whose abilities make as much sense as the player's slow-mo. Eventually a vat of Alma's DNA is recovered, but you don't really recover it; the bad guy that you killed and took it from actually has it. The best part about the game is that it is rather short, and that a guy got crushed by a flying truck. Oh, and the new Point Man gets promoted to Lieutenant at the end. Unfortunately, nobody cares.
==F.E.A.R 2: The Dead Don't Need Pregnancy Tests==
A Delta Force team who can stay alive and NOT die in 2 seconds is told to arrest the women president of Armacham. when you arrive some black ops people from the same company are trying to kill the president person because their retarded. despite being black ops you easily kill all of them and while being stalked sexually by Alma. as you rescue the president person you hallucinate and walk out of the room. then the city explodes FOR NO FUCKING REASON!!! doctors then put you back together and FOR NO FUCKING REASON you can do slo-mo fighting like the point man. you then fight your way through more black ops people who are killing everyone in the hospital FOR NO FUCKING REASON!!!!!!!! you then find one of your team getting stabed by a machine. a while later another member of your team shows up and trys to kill you because he wants to rape Alma. Alma then shows up and liqufys his flesh but doesnt bother killing you because she thinks your hot. after that the stupid president person tricks you into entering a thing that makes Alma even more horny for you but shhh, your not supposed to find that out yet. as your getting raped enhanced by the machine, more black ops people come but they get totally fucked up by Alma and you get separated from your team... again. you then fight you way through some more black ops guys and some weird skinny things who want to rape you and then you fight through an underground complex under the hospital. then the leader of the black ops people reactivates the Replicas FOR NO FUCKING REASON and you have to fight them. you then make it onto the streets while Armacham is fighting the replicas, which they released. 
After a while some black guy from your team trys to rescue a little girl which turns out to be Alma. you meet up with the black guy and the unexpendable chick from your team. then you watch with the chick as the black guy is killed by Alma. you and the soldier chick then make it to the APC and then drive off to some school which is run by Armacham as part of their Pedophile project. after walking around aimlessly with the chick, you get separated FOR NO FUCKING REASON. Alma then try's to fight you but you bash the shit out of her. later she try's again and you get the shit bashed out of you but she lets you go because she thinks your hot. of course your not because your a fag. you then regroup with the chick and that guy who got shot in the beginning. Alma then attacks you and that guy. you recover but That Guy is still a little fucked up. you then have to separate FOR NO FUCKING REASON. after that you regroup back with you team of 4 people. After a firefight in the sewers that guy wanders off. the chick sends you to go get him but he goes bat fuck insane and keeps disappearing into thin air. after some filler mission in the subway (eat fresh), you walk around outside and try to catch that guy but he's still bat fuck insane. you then fight your way through more replicas in an Armacham facility and then you reach some random island. after killing even more replicas and chasing That guy again, you group up with one of the people from your team in the APC. you then fight some replicas with the soldier guy and win despite the guy not even helping at all. the soldier chick then helps you into some random chair that a nerd that had his head chopped off told you to get into earlier in the game. then FOR NO FUCKING REASON the president women from the beginning comes and shoots the soldier chick becuase she wants to trap Alma. Alma then gets pissed off and pushes the president out of the way but before she can kill he Alma gets horny for you and the president succeeds in trapping you and Alma together. 
Then some really fucked up shit happans. you get put in another dimension and you have to turn the chair thingy on. but a pissed off That guy is trying to kill you because he wants to have sex with Alma and is jealous because shes horny for you. while you are fighting That guy, Alma is raping you in real life. after shooting That guy in the head you manage to turn the thingy on despite not knowing how the fuck to do it. then in real life Alma appears and is pregnant because of all the sex she was having with you while you were unconscious. 
in the end all of your team get killed except for that one unimportant Latino guy who helped you near the end and you got that ghost chick ,Alma pregnant. you horny bastard
==Character lifespans==
===Spen Jankowski===
Dies a few minutes into the game, despite being one of the most capable soldiers in the world at the time. Plot devices take no prisoners.
===Douglas Holiday===
Despite having been left alone by Alma for the entirety of the first game and killing almost as many Replica's as the player character, even he was not exempt from the F.E.A.R. rule of character development: "They must die." Alma killed him for no reason whatsoever, and in a way so disturbing that the suicide rate in America increased by 800%. As a side note, the F.E.A.R. storywriters admitted that Douglas would have survived if he wasn't black. In response a second Nazi regime was created to kill all white people in Europe. White flag shipments to France shortly after increased by 800%. With the official sequel, Monolith decided to just pretend Extraction Point never happened. Ignoring the opportunity to show Holiday still alive against all odds, Monolith instead decided to have Alma kill another black man with his voice. 
thumb|left|A Vivendi employee. I guess they shouldn't have killed off Jin.
===Jin Sun Kwon===
Jin was born in Seoul and was an extremely hot medical officer for the F.E.A.R. team. Her voice actor quit due to the lack of fried rice in the recording studio, but the F.E.A.R. story writers had already decided to kill her. She survives almost the entirety of both the original game and the expansion, but apparently killing her added to the story. Mass lynchings of Vivendi productions employees have followed.
===The F.E.A.R. Point Man (Player character)===
He survives, so is the only character with no background whatsoever. He is also so good at killing Replicas he was chosen as the character to play Deckard the Replica Slayer in Blade Runner. However, he cannot talk, making him only slightly less interesting than Harrison Ford. Carmine was asked to play the role, but he was busy filming gears of war 2.
thumb|right|Delta Force: Join Now
===SFOD-D Operatives 1-40===
In total, it is implied that these Delta Force operatives killed anywhere from 0-3 Replicas and a large robot. The ending credits of F.E.A.R. state that "No actual Delta Force Operatives were harmed in the making of this game", but that's like saying "No Jews were harmed in the making of the Holocaust".
==Quotes==
==See also== 
*Shit 
*Game 
*Plot device 
*Delta Force
*Knights of Hay Teresa
Category:Military technology
Category:Video games
pt:F.E.A.R.