Jay Jay The Jet Plane - The True Story

WARNING!: The Story You Are About To Read Involves Plane Jizz. Reader's Digression Advised.
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==The Truth Behind Jay Jat The Jet Plane - The Prologue==
It was a lovely day in wherever the fuck Jay Jay The Jet Plane lives, where a 50 year old plane named Jay Jay The Jet Plane lived, along with his friends, Tracy, Snuffy, Herky, Savannah, Big Jake, Old Oscar, and some humans and animals nobody gave a flying ass about. Jay Jay lived a fairly normal life, but there's something that I know that you don't. You want to know how Jay Jay and his friends became to be?... You Sick Bastards.
==Big Jake (Subjet VI)==
After five attempts at trying to make the perfect plane-human hybrid, a mad scientist has finally came up with the perfect way. He sends his assistant out to kidknap two people in the night. Once in the mad scientists hands, he peeled the flesh off of their faces and put said flesh in the sun for a long time. Once the fifth hour on the fifth day on the fifth month, the mad scientists took the flesh and placed them on two planes. He sewed them on the front of the planes. Nothing happened. He then poured a bottle of lube in the fule silage and began performing sexual acts on the plane. Jizz flew everywhere inside the plane. All the sudden, the face started to form from dead skin, to an actual face. Why? MAGIC! The plane started talking. "Happy Easter"! Big Jake Was Born. Big Jake rolled over to the mad scientist and crushed him. Blood and Guts and Piss and Jizz flew all over the place. "That's what you get for playing god. Maybe you should play dead for awhile". Big Jake said. He saw the pink plane and got turned on. He rolls over to the plane and begins humping it. The plane came to live after the plane jizz flies inside it. The plane became a female plane. She was pregnant a few days later. "Why would God give us faces"? The one female plane asked. Big Jake was too busy spreading his plane jizz all over the people, drowning them easily. After 9 months, the baby planes are born.
==Why This Story Was Never Heard Until Now==
The story was kept confidential by the Canadian Government. Nobody knew about this... Until Now. Recently, a podcast called The Sons Of Serizawa released their first episode. In that episode, they brought up how the recent summer movie Planes was so painfully commercial, and started bringing up Jay Jay The Jet Plane. Here's the video. Skip to 1:38:48 to see what I'm talking about.
The made up a fake backstory, sounding very similar to what I have told. Thr truth of the matter is... They weren't far off. What they said was almost identicle to what they said. How do I know the story? Simple. I used to work for the Canadian Government. They told dumb stories from Area 51 to The SCP Foundation. When they told me about the truth behind Jay Jay The Jet Plane, I was shocked. I quit immediately. Ever since then, I was being stalked by the Canadian Government. As of now, I am hiding in my basement. They can't find me. All the sudden a door slammed open and a gun was pulled to my head. BANG! My Life Ended.
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