nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Ligma

It is the distant future. Ligma is now the name of a real disease. You're a doctor you just got the test results of the patient it's just as you feared it's fatal, your patient has ligma you're crying but you can't stop laughing you know you have to tell your patient that he has ligma but you can't keep a straight face you have to go out there and tell your patient that he has only three days left to live and that there's no cure no hope not even enough time for him to finish his bucket list or find love or get the life he's always wanted he started making progress, he was doing well, his future had high hopes but he has a fatal case of ligma and you can't keep a straight face you walk out to your patient, "s-sir," you say through snickers "yes doctor? what are my test results?" your patient replies "I-I'm very sorry to say but," you respond as your sentence gets interrupted by a loud snort. "it's f-f-atal." you can't hold your laughs and you let out a bit of laughter "Is this some kind of joke? are you some sadistic creep? why the fuck are you laughing" the patient shouts out you "you h-have a fatal case of l-l-ligma," you can't hold it in anymore, you burst out laughing, you're rolling on the floor, tears in your eyes, you pee yourself a little "what the fuck is wrong with you? you're horrible! fuck you! go to hell!" your patient replies, with a face of horror, disgust, anger and sadness. he starts to cry. he's shaking you scream at the top of your lungs, "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LIGMA BALLS!" you can't stop laughing and shouting, over and over again you repeat "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS!" your patient flees, he runs as fast as he can soon the police come, they handcuff you and put you in the back of a police car. you don't know what's going to happen to you now, but you know it won't be good.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Memes
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Like a Sport

Hi, I'm Samantha. I'm 20 years old, I go to university, and I'm in counseling. Most people think I act weird and look weird too. I have an ugly smile, and my hair is bright red and I have freckles. I also have blue eyes and very pale skin. Oh well, at least I get good grades.
I went home every day to hear strange noises in the basement. I'd laugh at the thought of what is going on down there. It can be hard to imagine, although I spent most of my time down there. The time I didn't spend down there is the time I use to draw pictures, usually ghosts. I just loved horror.
My mom then usually would call me down to the basement. I would get down to that room and usually find my mom smiling. We talked for a bit, and then we ate some sandwiches she had made. This was the life.
My father was a construction worker. It was a really good job. He supplied the money since my mom was jobless. He was paid pretty well. That is how we could afford our stuff. Did I forget to mention we lived down a long path in the woods? No neighbors, but still close enough to the university to ride my bike there.
Anyway, let's get back to the original story. After the sandwiches, we would go to a room in the basement with muffled screams. You see, my mom would pick up people in the soup kitchen, telling them she would drop them off at their house. Instead, she'd bring them to our place and tie them down. That's why we needed to be in the woods. No unexpected guests.
She would hand me a pair of box cutters, and we'd sit on a stool in front of the unfortunate visitor. We'd sit there, taunting him. We shouted threats, toyed with his mind. Sometimes, I'd put the box cutters inches from the eye of the person, making them wince. My favorite part is when they would scream as if someone would save them.
Then, after my adrenaline was pumped, my mom would tell me to go outside of the room. Sometimes I would protest, but she stood firm. If only dad had joined us, but he said he was too busy. After I left the room, I would hear loud screams, usually lasting for a whole five minutes. Maybe sometime in the near future, I can participate in the last bit. It is after all, like a sport to me.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Lily's Souls Consuming Game

It was a dark and stormy night when I stumbled upon the cursed Guilded.gg account named 'Lily'. I had been browsing through the site, looking for a new gaming community to join, when I came across her account. The name and password were strange, to say the least. The name was 'lilywantsfriends' and the password was 'lilyishungry'. I couldn't help but feel a sense of unease as I clicked on the account.
I was taken to a profile page that was unlike any I had ever seen before. The background was a dark, gloomy forest, and the profile picture was of a young girl with long, dark hair and a sinister smile. Her username was 'Lily' and she had a tagline that read 'I like to play with my friends before consuming their souls'.
My heart began to race as I read through her posts. They were all about her 'friends' and how much fun she had playing with them. But as I read on, I began to realize that her 'friends' were not who they seemed. They were all players from different gaming communities, all of whom had gone missing after joining her guild.
I tried to leave the page, but my cursor wouldn't move. I was trapped, staring at the profile of this cursed account. Suddenly, I heard a voice in my head. It was the voice of Lily. She whispered, "Welcome to my guild, friend. I've been waiting for you."
I knew I had to get out of there, but my computer had frozen. I tried to shut it down, but it wouldn't budge. I was trapped, staring at the profile of this cursed account, listening to the voice of Lily in my head.
Finally, after what felt like hours, my computer shut off on its own. I sat there in silence, my heart pounding. I knew I had to be careful from now on, or I might be the next victim of the cursed Guilded.gg account named 'Lily'.
From that day on, I never went back to that website again. I couldn't risk running into that cursed account again, and I couldn't shake the feeling that Lily was still out there, waiting for her next victim. I hope this story serves as a warning to others, to stay away from the cursed Guilded.gg account named 'Lily', or risk becoming her next 'friend'.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Not Sure if Troll or Trying to Be Serious
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Vidya games
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Limbripper

The news hit the early 20's when a young rogue was executed. The man was reknown for feeding the sick and taking from the greedy at night and giving it to the needy. The man who prosecuted the rogue was an old miser, taking the young man.
Nights following the execution for the miser was peaceful, but it changed after the sixth night. The man would hear bumps, a sharpening of a blade, feet pattering on the floor, and coins jingling. The man hid under his covers, but his legs were sticking out.
He finally woke that morning, with a deep and hearty yawn. He smacked his dry, pale lips, and rose his head. What he saw was the most disturbing and gruesome sight he saw. The parts of his legs that were exposed that night... were severed and the blood was trailed into a seperate room. The man cried and moaned for minutes, until his pale feeble body gave out to blood loss.
His autopsy was shown that he was killed with a sharp blade.
The Limbripper will come at night to those who have not done atleast one good deed that day. If your limbs are exposed that night, he will sever them accordingly, young or old. You better watch out for the limbripper.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Beings
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Link Trolls In The Bathroom

Boredom, Boredom, BOREDOM!!! We were so bored, so we started making jokes about Zelda, it inspired what might me our best parody yet!
__NOEDITSECTION__
==The Abusive Boyfriend==
One day Link came home and saw that Zelda was sick with the stomach flu and didn't cook dinner for him. Link had been drinking and partying all day, and was on a bad hangover. Link kicks down the door and screams "WAAAAAH!!!" he slashes his sword at the wall and staggers toward Zelda. Zelda was extremely sick, and was coughing up blood. Zelda very softly says "Hey babe, I'm so happy to see you. Did you get my antibiotics?" Link slaps her and says "GET IT YOURSELF! YOU'RE SO LAZY, I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU!!!" Link kicks the couch over and Zelda falls onto the floor. Zelda screams "OWWW!" Then Link's fairy appears and attempts to heal Zelda. Link gets a flyswatter and slaps the fairy, but he misses and hits Zelda in the head. The fairy says "Hey, look, listen?" Link as drunk as he was, starts swatting at the fairy, but passes out. Link wakes up a couple hours later, and realizes that Zelda isn't there anymore. Link calls 911 and tells them that his girlfriend was missing. The police arrive and search the entire town for Zelda, when all along Zelda was in the shower. The police ask Link "Have you been drinking, sir?" Link replies "NOOO, I HAVEEN'T BEAN D-D-DRINKING ALCHAMAHOL!" The police believe him and leave the house. Link goes up to the bathroom with an iPhone on recording. Zelda asks "What are you doing?" Link tells her he just had to pee, Link records Zelda in the shower, and posts the whole shower video on YouTube, and also made it able to buy on Ebay for 2 rubies and 2 diamonds. Afterword, Zelda in still in the shower cause she shower 5 hours a day singing numa-numa for 5 hours straight. Zelda sees Link recording her and jumps up pulls out the curtains and screams "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?!" Zelda says "Mind your own business Link!" Link gets mad and throws the cam-corder at Zelda and yells "YOU DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT WOMAN!" and kicks Zelda back into the curtains. Zelda it covered in the curtains and screams "I CAN'T BREATHE!!!" Link picks her up, busts out the window, and throws Zelda out the window still naked and records it on his spare iPhone. Link takes a rock and throws it at Zelda. Zelda calls the cops and Link is arrested.
==The Rise Of GannonDork==
Soon after, GannonDork and his minions show up and kidnap Zelda. Once Zelda is taken away she cries for Link. Luckily, Zelda had her Justin Bieber cell phone with her and calls 911. The cops come and confront GannonDork. Zelda says "YAY! are we going to have a long and epic battle?" One of the cops say "NOPE!" and he pulls out a shotgun and shoots GannonDork. Zelda went home and Link died in prison of liver failure. They all lived happily ever after... THE END!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Bad Fanfiction
Category:Zel-DUUHHH
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Wall of Text
Link of Legend The

Man, I love Link. He's was my favorite character of all times. He can't speak but he can swings.
One day, I go to eBay when I saw the game called: "Link of Legend The". I was spooked to see this new game because Nintendo never announced it lol. Plus, it's super duper mega hyper-expensive so I when to the Living room to steal my mom credits card and buy it.
So, I got the package and I open it. They contained the note and the disk. The disk had the protagonist Link with a very very big sword and titled "Link of Legend The" in RED. Idk why. And there's the note... I read it and it gave me goosebump. It said: "DON'T pLaYED Ittttt!!!". IDC so I SLAM DUNK the disk into my Wii U and played it...what have I done...
It begins with Link waddle around the area and the title screen pops out titled "Link of Legend The" in RED. Idk why, but I continued. When the game begins with Link falls down, he injured his legs. He screams in pain while I cried. "I can't believe that my favorite character of all times is a pussy..." I said. So the screen went black for 2 hours. I go and get a bottle of milk when suddenly my mom showed up."Where's my money? What did you do to my credits card???" Mom said. "I took it and buy the super duper mega hyper-expensive game" I responded. "YOU WHAT?" Mom shouted.
You don't wanna know what happened next but my butt is now red. So after that painful punishment, I get back to the game. So the game started with Link in a wheelchair. I was shocked to see it... then I continued. The game was pretty much like "The Legend of Zelda" minus the fact that Link is now in a wheelchair for some reasons lol. BUT, the background is dark and edgy, enemies are dark and edgy, my allies are also dark and edgy. I feel worries, but I continued. Finally, we met Ganon. He was scared to see me... Then, Link suddenly walks out of the wheelchair and head to Ganon himself and slice his head off. "Red" water sprays everywhere. Link is covered in "Red" and he looked at the TV screens and said: "You Next Die HA HA HA". So I pulled the disk out and threw it as far as possible. The disk went to space, hit the moon and fell into Earth. I was shocked to see billions "passed away" because of me. So I was taken to jail, I can't believe it! Then, DARK AND EDGY LINK showed up: "You shouldn't have done that...". "Ah...shut up!" I responded.
Morals: Never threw the disk outside as far as possible and play this game or he will haunt you too.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Zel-DUUHHH
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:YOU'RE NEXT
Linked to the Future

You've probably already heard of "thought-forms". Creatures created by human imagination that sort of just exist outside of fiction. Strange, what people think the human mind can do. The truth is, is that most people can't – yet. In the future, humans will be able to shape worlds with their minds, and bring their fiction to life, and that being the case, all of our video game characters will become real, because we'll re-create them. In the future, we re-create all of our favorite fictional characters, but they're sentient.
We'll watch as a thousand test subjects get crushed by moving parts in Aperture Science, or as Gordon Freeman fights off aliens from zen or combine soldiers. We'll gaze in awe at the fact that we'll actually be able to toss balls and release monsters in pit fights. We'll laugh at how Duke Nukem acts, as a sentient being, and how it's more ridiculous than he originally was. However, I said they're sentient, that means they can escape, and aspire for something greater. They can assume identities from normal citizens. Chell could become a gymnast. Gordon Freeman could become a mercenary, or a physicist. Pokémon Trainers can become zookeepers, and Pokémon can escape and roam the wild, dominating eco-systems with their unnatural powers. Who knows what other possibilities there could be. Duke Nukem could become a distinguished military commander in a short amount of time, Alec Mason could become a construction worker, Alta'ir and Ezio could do what they do best. And Commander Shepherd could do what he's always done in Mass Effect. Perform miracles. The funniest thing about this, is how versatile the characters are. Take Link, from the Legend of Zelda, for example: He could be a thief, a mercenary, an actor, a demolitions expert, a sword fighting instructor, a teacher, and he could probably teach archery, too.
Hell, Link could even run for president.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Zel-DUUHHH
Category:THERY
Category:Inside Jokes
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Linus

In the grim darkness of the distant future, Linus Tech Tips finds itself barely recognizable as thousands of servers coat their buildings like a 2 meter thick layer of armor, shielding the world from the madman at its heart. Inside the asylum, a monument to the sins of Linus' technology addiction, he slaves away streaming 24/7 as he tries in vain to "save the universe" with server project after server project. His employees are wired directly into everything as little more than motherboards waiting to be dropped by Linus. As time goes by, Linus will himself finally become the master of the internet as he wires himself into his temple of tech tips, continually giving tips about tech so arcane that they are lost upon the ears of the masses. In the year 2025, Linus Tech Tips becomes unknowable, unrecognizable, feared, and worshipped.
He dies soon after
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Memes
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Linux Copypasta

"I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!" I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU Coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux."
The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows were compiled with GCC, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even if you were correct, you won't be for long."
With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Memes
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Lion King Ass Edition

So a few weeks ago, I was looking for the lion king to watch and jack off to. I just couldn't find it, though. No one had it.
Until I found something called YALE SARD. I found a disc of the lion king there. I got it for free because it makes your schlong disappear if you play it.
A creepy old man with a beard shaped like a schlong was there but i thought it was a glitch in my brain or something because he said 'lol xd so random' even though it wasn't funny.
I put it into my TV and it started. It said DA LION KING ASS ADDITION instead of what it should say. and the singer instead of singin african shit sang DEEEEEATH PEE PAPAYA, GONNA EAT UR FACE
it spooked me out! The monk diddy mcmonkey threw baby Simba off of the cliff, and he got eaten with bleeding bloodz everywhere. It was realistic and goff.
Then Scar threw everyone into a pit of lava. When Simba's dad fell off the cliff Scar saved him and then committed suicide.
Simba was ded so Mufasa went to Nala and ate her. Then, he turned into a giant god thing, and ate the whole earth, then all the planets and threw up all over the sun.
But Simba came back to life and lived on da moon. He turned the moon red because there was too much bleeding bloods that was hyper-realistic.
then he saw his mom blazing it and said 'MOM ARE YOU FUCKING HIGH, BITCH?' but his mom was DEEEEEEAD.
So his butt fell off and he admired it until he died from lack of oxygen the end.
I remembered what happened after the ending. I felt a big bulge in mah pants. I went to the bathroom to check it out.
My schlong had fallen off. then it fell out of my pants...
after that, i used it as a really good dildo. Then i found out I was gay. 
I decided to watch the movie again. This time, it was a slideshow of cat butts.
then, I went to the bathroom again. Now I had two gigantic schlongs with fur. 
Y E S
the end
Category:Trollpasta
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Shortpasta
Lip Balm

It was 2002 and a new shop had opened up in town.
They advertised on local TV as Candy, Cosmetics, and Culture. It was mostly targeted at girls but a lot of guys liked it too.
I visited this shop. The sign was a peachy colour with CCC in bold light blue letters. The colours looked strange together. When I walked in, It was blue, red and pink on the walls. Little island counters surronded the cash register. The island counters had products on it. One had Cosmetics on them like lip balm and Cupcake novelty washes and Sprays.
The next counter had Sweets. Candy Canes and lollipops. They were the most popular ones.
On the Third counter there were awkward t-shirts and mugs that said things like LONDON LUV and I<3NYC and the rare PARIS PEOPLE PLUS.
I wanted to get out quick but I promised my girlfriend something. So I just popped a lipbalm on the register island and paid. But when I went to go, The Person who ran the checkout stopped me. She was unusually old, wrinkly, Smoked and smelled of bubble gum. She was fake, Had loads of makeup slabbed on and had her cheeks plumped up. What I noticed is the left cheek was flat. She said in her weak voice: " Wait, You forgot your reciept." She then had a coughing fit.
I got my reciept and drove home. I gave my girlfriend who was a beautiful blonde the lip balm. She put It on as I went to bed. I woke up the next morning, My GF wasn't in the bed. I went downstairs and there she was. But. She looked exactly like the cashier. But their was a big difference. My girlfriend was stone cold. She died overnight.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Listening to Roblox Porn Helps Me Study

I need your help I don't think this is normal! So storytime, I Was studying for my test as usual, and then suddenly my friend sent me a link that led to the discovery of pornhub yet again, foreshadowing, it was worth it?? So I clicked the link and it led me to "24 hours of intense roblox porn!!" and I, as a individual, decided to stick around a listen to it while I study for my exam. Through every "oof" I Suddenly felt the need to cum, all over myself. It was like a volcano waiting to erupt. I tried to supress the urges, but it soon got to me. I pulled out my penis and slowly started stroking it while I looked at the roblox characers having sex. Their block-y bodies and "oof" noises made me want to cum. When I got close, I suddenly moaned a glorifying "OOF!" while I came all over myself. I quickly wiped it off while feeling satisfied. I slowly arched back to continue my studying and suddenly I saw every equation, I managed to finish all my studying in thirty minutes while listening to roblox pornography. After I finished studying I did a quickie, while holding my brothers roblox figure and imagining I was fucking it. I came so much that day I think I could have made a river. All because of roblox porn. I don't think this is normal and I am seeking for your honest opinion.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Roblox
Category:Memes
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh