Dr. Chen Chinese medicine for breathe delight

So what is Dr. Chen Chinese Medicine? It is best result for breathe delight! I am Dr. Chen son and so I now tell American friends what is Dr. Chen Chinese Medicine. 
==Medicines Ready Now To Give Delivery==
Dr. Chen is having many fine herbal medicines. They are list below. Now Dr. Chen is ready to make delivery of all medicines. You order now!
===Silkworm Faeces===
Dr. Chen he say: 桑蠶屎可以是最有利諧調和溫暖中部區域。 發行拉緊并且鎮定頭腦。
That is just so! I, first son of Dr. Chen, now translate into the English for our American friends. He say: "The silkworm excrements may be harmonizes advantageously with the warmth middle the region. And release tautness calm brains."
American friend, if you want tautness calm brains just order Bombycis faeces now! Get warmth middle soonest possible with these fine excrements. Dr. Chen is always guarantee best outcome. Silkworms feed upon the leaves only of the mulberry tree, and most pure are their excrements. For centuries past have the concubines of emperors used these faeces to strengthen warm middles and to prolong moments of clouds-and-rain. The mind is eased. The spirit is oxygenated. The teeth become white, the navel becomes shapely, the nostrils open. Order now online!
===Skin of White Pattern Snake===
Dr. Chen he say: 當您咽下白色鱷魚蛇的新近地搽粉的皮膚，開花不會是一样新鮮的象您的皮膚亲爱的夫人。
And what is your think in English? I translate, it is just this: "When you swallow the skin which the white patterned snake recently powdered, will flower will not be equally fresh looks like you skin dear madame."
Amazing result! White patterned snake grows only in China desert. Skin containing essences of sky, snow, and sand and will guarrantee not to cause bursting of eyeballs or liquefaction of the tongue. Only in China! Your face will not contain a look of dismay. Dr. Chen himself is speaking and me, his son having of 12 years old, is translate. So there is promise of strong truth breathing. You are trust of his words.
===Gecko===
Dr. Chen he say: 與肥胖尾巴的壁虎提供男性擴大和持久力以最大的功率的堅硬。 腎臟成為健康和像櫻桃樹的肝臟開花在春天。
And I translate just so: "Provides the masculine expansion and the endurance with the obese tail's gecko by biggest power hardness. The kidney becomes the health and cherry tree's liver blossoms likely in the spring."
So best result only is possible. The masculine expansion is guaranteed. Great power of endurance and calm elongation comes forth like the male panda from his abode. But Dr. Chen he now say, 過份性行为將導致腎臟的yin和楊缺乏。I translate just so: "The excessive sex act will cause kidney's Yin and Yang lacks." Dear American friend if you are do the excessive sex act be too much careful of Yin and Yang balance of kidneys.
===Pig Bile===
For remedy of excessive sex act must you enjoy pig bile. This is to prevent the bad event of harmful stones in the kidney due to Yin and Yang imbalance.
Dr. Chen he say: 您必须迅速吞下豬膽汁，并且那將溶化像雪融解的肾结石在明媚的阳光之下。
Yes, this is perfect truth! I translate now: "You must swallow down the pig bile rapidly, and that will dissolve the kidney stone which the snow melts likely under the beautiful sunlight." 
Everyone know that the American men do too much the sex act. Even in Peoples' Republic of China we see YouTube of typical American woman like Britney Spears and Paris Hilton. How so American man does not do too much the sex act? Is not possible! So to most quickly enjoy the pig bile is only way for to balance the kidney Yin and Yang. You order now! Right now online! From Dr. Chen!
==Testimonials==
Now I, son of Dr. Chen, post real and true stories of Uncyclopedia people who are help by Dr. Chen Chinese medicine.
*One-eyed Jack say: "Let me tell you, before I started taking Dr. Chen's pig bile powder I simply could not hold my liquor. After only a six-pack I would be staggering around the neighborhood pissing in peoples' hydrangeas and gibbering like a baboon in the moonlight. Now I can drink all I want and maintain the calm of Buddha and the poise of Confucius. Of course all my teeth fell out, but that's a small price for a serious drinker to pay."
*So So say: "Dr. Chen's Silkworm Faeces were a godsend for me! My wife had left me, I got laid off from the office, and the porn channel stopped coming in for my favorite wank program. Pretty much everything was going downhill. But then I ran across some of Dr. Chen's teachings from a flashing pop-up banner, and learned how my inner middle was out of balance, and how my ching-chong cauldron had overturned, corroding my vital organs with negative ch'i. Well, I'm not sure what I'm talking about anymore, but I can say for sure this worm junk gives one hell of a kick to my evening crack pipe!"
*LedBalloon say: "Very much enjoyment to me is given by this product! For many days I was left alone and wandering and loveless with no friends and the embarrassing side effects of erectile dysfunction. No more! Now I am much loved by many and all and everyone with their full hearts, and my loving is as powerful as the strength of roaring waterfall. Thanks are to you, Dr. Chen!"
*PantsMacKenzie say: "I didn't even know silkworms had faces! I now eat them every day! In fact, Th- ...Wait. What do you mean they're not f- ...THEY'RE WHAT??!?!?"
Category:Medicine