Devious Help

"Devious Help" is the 40th episode of Wiksteria Lane.
==Summary==
Bored with her routine and hoping to set out on an adventure, the loud, sassy, obnoxious and obscene Devious Peep joins forces with her best friends to rescue her idol, MaryPierceLopez, from the mental facility she has been admitted to. But along the journey, they will have to face many perils, foes and challenges. Meanwhile, nothing else happens.
==Plot==
"Helloooooooooooo WIKIA!!" Edie Rothwell fan7, the hostess of The Wiki View, greets her studio audience and her viewers at home. "We have such a very special guest today, probably the most important person that has ever set foot in this studio other than me, and we shall bring her out right now for your own personal blessing! Come out bitch!!" Devious Peep, the guest du jour, comes out onto the set and gives Edie a big fat kiss on the lips that almost numbs the hostess. The crowd goes wild. Everyone stands up and cheers enthusiastically and hysterically, and Peep holds her hands up together in the air, above her big head of hair, running around and cheering for herself, along with the crowd. She then takes her seat next to the hostess, who starts conversating with her guest: "So Peep, honey, sugar, banana, you have won the Nobel Prize for Black Affairs. How did that feel?" "Felt like about damn time!" Peep practically shouts, "I been black my whole dog-gone life and ain't nobody ever given me shit fo' dat till now!" "Story of my life," Edie tells her, "Story of my life. Now, you really caused a sensation at the award-giving ceremony. Can we roll the clip?" On the large screen behind them, footage of Devious Peep arriving from her limousine at the red carpet of the Nobel Prizes is shown. She is seen wearing a potato sack. "Now," Edie tells her, "Most people wouldn't be caught dead in a potato sack, but you really rocked that look." "What can I tell ya, fool?" Peep responds, "Beauty matches everything." The next clip shows Peep at the ceremony. After being declared the recipient of that year's award, she comes down to the center of the area to be given the medal, and as soon as she sees it, she proclaims: "What the fuck is dis shit?! Where is the little golden man-shaped dildo thingy?" The man holding the medal tells her, "You're thinking of an Oscar... an Academy Award. Nobel prizes are medals." "Well fuck dis shit I can't stick a large coin up my ass, you dragged me all the way across here from Wiksteria Lane for a medal? A medal?! I get those from cereal boxes fool!!!" The man is shocked, and she snatches the medal from his hands and puts it inside her cleavage. "Fine, I'ma take it... I'ma take yo wallet too." She reaches her hand inside his pocket and the man jumps, letting out a loud "Hey!" "Oh sorry!!" Peep tells him, "That ain'tcho wallet!!" She starts laughing; "Thatcho penis!!" The clip comes to an end. Edie and the audience clap. "Wow," Edie says, "What a class act. All the way." "Momma didn't raise no hound," Peep says, "She raised her a classy-ass bitch. Then she died. Lupus." The audience bands together in a collective "Awww." "Now, you've had a hard life, haven't you?" the hostess queries, and the guest says, "It's hard out there for a bitch. It's a white dog world, and I'm just trying to get mah bite of the steak." "You were recently fired from your job as a receptionist-slash-secretary to be replaced by a white man, is that right?" "Hell yeah, dat was some fucked up shit right there, I could've sued they's asses but yunno what, I believe in peace, I'm a pacifier, and I was too broke to hire me a damn lawyer cos dem faggots cost a lot and ain't nobody got money fo dat." "So you took the high road," Edie says, "Wow." She turns to her audience and repeats: "Wow!" Everyone claps. "You are such an inspiration to people all over the world, particularly of color. Children look up to you. How do you handle that?" Peep answers: "It's some frustrating shit cos, yunno, peeps look at me like I'm an idol or some shit, when they should look at me like I'm a God. Like, be humble, fools." "I would follow you to Heaven," Edie tells her; "Fool you just might have to cos ain't nobody brought me no damn coffee yet and I'm about to shoot up this place!" "Somebody get this woman some fucking coffee you imbeciles!" Edie stands up and shouts, and a stagehand brings Peep coffee. She takes a sip and burns her tongue. Then she smashes the mug over the man's head. He drops unconscious to the floor and the interview proceeds. "Tell us about your past, your family," Edie says, and Peep starts telling her, "Well, I ain't neva met mah daddy, but dat fool will prolly show up once he finds out I'm a big shit now and ask me fo some money or some shit at which point I'll tell him to go fuck himself with the pointy end of his gurlfriend's cock. My nana raised me after momma died, and she was a total skank-ass bitch, God rest her soul. I have a sista, and she's in the audience. Hey bitch!!" Peep waves at her sister, WerriGleek117, who is passed out in the studio audience, a syringe stuck in her arm. "She looks so much like you," Edie comments, "Your whole family must be so proud. I know I am, after all, we are all brothers and sisters." "Bitch I don't even know yo name!" "You don't have to, I am beneath you. Peep, it was an immense pleasure having you here today," the hostess says; "Pleasure was all yours," Peep responds. "But that's everything we have time for," Edie finishes, and turns to the audience, "And because momma loves you all so much..." she says, "Everybody look under your damn chairs. And you'll find... A BRAND NEW BABY!" The guests all look under their seats and cheer as they admire the newborn children and hold them, the babies crying. Edie starts running around next to the audience and pointing at them and shouting, "You're getting a baby! You're getting a baby! You're getting a baby! YOU'RE ALL GETTING BABIES!!!" The audience thrives with excitement. Edie reaches out under Peep's own chair and takes out a caucasian baby for her. "This one's for you, my sister, enjoy." Peep smiles as she takes the child in her arms and thanks her. "Look ma!!" Peep shouts, "I gots me a vanilla baby!!" Peep then puts the child down and starts twerking while Edie does her regular dance to wrap up the show.
Her ass jiggles as she twerks, subconsciously, whilst lying face down on her bed. Sleeping. It had all been a dream. The television in the navbar is on, and Edie Rothwell fan7 is seen hosting the morning edition with her very special guest, country-pop music sensation Taylor Alison Swift. The blonde starlet makes it to the set and the interview starts. Devious Peep wakes up, finally, and seems disappointed to learn she was dreaming, and there isn't, in fact, any Nobel Prize or caucasian baby to call her own.
Devious Peep feels an itch in her mighty mane, and scratches it. A rat jumps out of it. She then gets out of bed and heads towards the burnbook, scratching her overweight derrière in the process. She looks in the cracked mirror, looking like something a wild boar threw up, and says, "Damn bitch you look sexy..." She then makes out with her reflection, leaving tongue prints all over the mirror. She catches a glimpse of the weather outside; it's a rather grey and dreary day. She turns back to her reflection and says, "Okay bitch, let's go outside and teach the sun how one shines."
Shortly afterwards, Devious Peep gets out of her house, and the little children of the neighborhood who had been playing ball near her template run and scream upon seeing her. She makes her way to Villain fan's template and knocks on the front door. The man himself answers it and looks disgusted to see her. "What up suga daddy?" Villain sighs, and asks her what she wants. "Well, I'm Mary's best friend and I wanna know if she can come out and play. Play with me. And some dicks." Villain tells her, still with a stern look, that Mary hasn't been living with him for a while, and he had her committed to a mental facility to help her overcome her sex addiction anyway. Peep's eyes widen, she gasps and says, "I'ma punch yo dick!!" Said and done, she punches Villain fan in the crotch. The middle-aged man bends over and groans, and Peep asks him how he could have done that to poor Mary. She then leaves his property, and starts to tear up, getting emotional. "Mary... my sweet, sweet tramp..."
"How do you do?" Lady Junky asks, in her customary thick French accent, over the phone. Standing up beside her hospital bed, she has whatever personal belongings there were with her when she was admitted inside her clutch. On the other side, from the bedroom she's been placed in at the mental facility, her sister Mary looks bored. "I'm just so fucking 'eh', you know? Like... I dunno, they stuck me in this bedroom, took all my sexy clothes and expect me to do therapy sessions on a daily basis. Twice. It's... ugh. I hate dad." Lady tells her their papa was just worried about her, and thinking of what was in her best interest. "Yeah, whatever," Mary says, "I don't give two fucks, I just want out of this place. What about you, you getting out now?" Lady confirms this, saying their father will be picking her up shortly. "You know..." Mary continues, "I... I know I never really helped anything around you guys, but... Deep down I actually kinda sorta rooted for you and Rena." Lady smiles subtly, and thanks her. She then says she should hang up and prepare to leave, and wishes her luck with her therapy, saying they'll talk later. "I love you," Lady adds. Mary doesn't know how to respond. "Yeah. Um, okay. Bye." She hangs up.
Devious Peep looks depressed, sitting on a bench in the kitchen of Wiki Burger, where she has been given her latest job. DisneyMeerkats, her co-worker, is seen flipping burgers on the grill, and asks the black woman what is wrong. "I got a wicked case of the blacks today," Peep responds. "...Do you mean the blues?" Disney asks, to which the loud negro replies, "I ain't blue you dumb tranny do I look like a Smurf to you?!" Disney rolls her eyes, and Peep notices this and gets up, walking towards her and saying, "Now don'tchu dare gimme no stink-eye or I'm gon' make you the color of mah skin using mah fist!" Disney, intimidated, meekly apologizes. Peep sits down again and Disney asks her why she's depressed. Peep explains that her best friend has been sent to a mental institution. "Of course..." Disney comments. "So," she continues, "Are you just... going to mope about it all day long?" Peep thinks about this for a few seconds, and then stands up and says, "No... you right fool. I'ma go save her! I'ma go get mah best gurlfrend back!" Disney, surprised, tells her, "I actually meant more like grab a spatula and start working." "Fool who you talking to?! Just cos I'm black don't mean I'm yo slave!!" Disney's eyes widen, as the mammoth before her adds, "Just fo dat I'ma go to yo home and steal yo shit!" "Yeah, you do that..." Disney tells her, annoyed. Peep prepares to leave, and Disney asks her where she's going. "It's been five minutes since you got in... You have to work an 8-hour shift." Peep turns to her and says, "Cover fo me, will you honky? I got important shit to get to." "No!" Disney blurts out. Peep, annoyed, turns around and says, "Excu' me?" "I'm sick and tired of putting up with your crap!" Disney complains, "Just because you are big and black and loud doesn't mean you can go around doing whatever you want! Now get back here and get to work or I will report you to our manager!" Peep doesn't say anything. But she starts to fume. She walks up towards Disney, one slow step at a time, and the young transexual starts to get frightened. She walks backwards until she hits the wall, and Peep gets face to face with her. Their eyes lock. Peep's are enraged. Disney's are tearful. And then the large woman utters: "...I still smell the peen in you, tranny boy..." Then she turns around and leaves. Disney inhales deeply and slides down to the floor, slowly.
Pll is seen scrubbing a vase of her boss', in the entrance hall of his Lostpedia manor. There is a knock on the door, and Pll goes to answer it, vase still in her hand. It's Devious Peep. "C'mon fool!" Peep tells her, "We roll now." "Ok," Pll says, and drops the vase to the floor, causing it to shatter. She follows the large black woman outside into a school bus, where WerriGleek117 and Camsay are sitting. "Why you drive el auto de la escuela?" Pll asks, as she makes her way to one of the front seats of the bus. "Mah car got fucked up when I ran over sum cray bitch yesterday," Peep tells her, which prompts Camsay to gasp loudly and say, "O to the M to the F to the G!! Did she like die?" "Nah, she'll be up and stalkin' in like a month," Peep answers, "And I got a gig as a school bus driver last month. But then those dipshits fired me and handed me sum papers sayin' I can't be within ten feet of kids anymo'. But I sure as fuck can sneak back into they's cafeteria and piss in they's stew HA!! Oh, and I took their bus. Yolo. By the way, chica, lemme introduce you to mah peeps. This faggy right here is mah bromo, Camsay. Camsay, this is I luv pll." "OMG," Camsay says, "I've heard so much about you! Only never cos all Peep and I ever talk about is the johnson. OMG I went there tehehehehehehe!! I'm always going there!!" Pll gives him a stern look and says, "Dios hates you." Camsay tells her, "I don't know what that means but you're precious! I love Asians, I'm all like Gwen Stefani!" "Pll is Latin," Peep tells him. "OMG do your hips not lie?! We are so besties now hugs hugs!!" He hugs Pll, who doesn't move, unfazed. Peep then points at the dazed-looking druggy behind her and says, "And this is my sista and only family left, WerriGleek117. She's a whore." "I tink you all whores," Pll says. "No, but she's a real whore. She gets money for whoring. Lucky bitch." Werri regains some consciousness and says, "My vagina is melting..." "No, honey, it's just leaking. You gots vaginal discharge. Cos you sick as fuck." "I have TDS's..." Werri says. Peep turns to Pll and says, lowly, "She's dyslexic..." "Why we here?" Pll asks. "Bcuz, fool, we gots to save our best friend, Mary!! She's in a cuckoo's nest and we's gon' save her sorry ass!" "Ok," Pll says, "But why faggy and die-y coming?" "Because!" Peep starts to say, before she gets emotional, "Look, peeps... I don't gots much many friends. People tend to... to run from me. Cuz I'm black and fat and scary. But... you's are mah best people. I love you guys. And I want all my friends, the peeps I care about most, together. Goin' on an adventure. We all have so much in common. We are reunited for a great cause, rescuing Mary. And we are all brought together because of how much we love dick." "OMFG I love dick so much I wish I could breathe it instead of oxygen!!" Cam blurts out; "Es muy bueno, muy bueno, el pene," Pll says; "I got a dick in my ass cos my last client had leprosy..." Werri adds. "Ok," Pll starts to say, "How we save Mary?" "Well, she in a mental institution in some ratchet-ass wiki. I guess we, we just go and grab the bitch." "Hold on honey," Cam says, "If she's been admitted per someone else's instruction, then she can't leave on her own accord, you said she's still a minor! She needs her father's permission. The only people who could probably get her out would be Staff members, they have diplomatic immunity anywhere in wikia." "Well then, that makes it easy," Peep says, "I'ma be Staff." "Ok," Pll says. Peep gets the engine started and the school bus speeds off. On the way, they pass by Rena and Lynette, walking together on the sidewalk, who both wave at them. Rena waves his right hand, Lynette his right stump. "Wait," Rena says, turning to him, "Why are we walking together? We're mortal enemies." "We needed to appear," Lynette replies. "Oh." They keep walking.
The bus makes its way to Wiksteria Lane, to the titular portal, and Pll asks why they are there. Peep tells her she made a promise to someone that she intends to keep.
Shortly afterwards, Devious Peep, all alone, is seen looting Disney's template, putting all sorts of valuable or potentially valuable items inside a big black garbage bag, the kind she always carries around in her crotch. Then, she starts to hear some faint moaning that grabs her attention. She inspects the origin of the sounds, and tracks them down to the pantry. She turns the knob but it's locked, so she kicks the door down, and startles the captive person inside. The scare allows Merrystar to properly regain consciousness, and as Peep looks on at the tied-up and gagged-up woman before her, she says, "If dis is some freaky bondage shit... I'm in." Merry utters some muffled cries for help, and Peep promptly removes the duct tape over her mouth. Merry squeals, and Peep tells her, "There, dat took care of yo mustache. Now what happened fool?" Peep starts to untie Merrystar, and the middle-aged blonde woman, finally freeing herself, starts to tell her, "Oh mon Dieu it was horrible! The crazy old woman she she knock me down and tie me up and she said, she said I couldn't be with Villain and she said she could kill me and..." Peep tils her head back, closes her eyes and pretends to snore, loudly. "Bored now! I didn't ask fo yo life story. Peace I'm out." She turns around, picks up her garbage bag and leaves. Merrystar just looks confused.
Back on the bus, Camsay asks Peep what they will do exactly, to which the black woman tells him they will break into Staff headquarters, steal anything they can use in order to pass themselves as Staff members, and save Mary afterwards. Camsay, however, reminds her that Staff has security, and they are ruthless... Pll then has an idea: "Boss has laboratory. Crazy scientist mister. Maybe he have weapon we use." Peep tells her, "Bitch that's a sweet-ass idea! How you know dis shit?" Pll looks her in the eyes and tells her, "I know... everyting." Peep steps on the pedal and off they go.
"You seem to find that very soothing," the doctor tells her, as the young beauty continually draws lines on the sand of the zen garden with the little rake. "I like to imagine they're penises," she tells her therapist, "I really miss penises, doctor. So much that I could cry." Tears well up in her eyes. "Please... please can I see yours?" "Mary..." he tells her, clearly uncomfortable, "We've been through this. I understand that you... on some level you always seem to want to connect to those around in a sexual way. It's your way of getting to know people, or so you think." "Well, doesn't it make sense to you?" she asks him, "During sex, you get to see people at their most exposed. Stripped of any inhibitions. Almost... vulnerable. Yet so powerful. Surely there's something to take from that. But I don't know, you're the psychologist." Adam smiles and nods. "You're a bright young lady, aren't you?" She smiles. "Be that as it may, Mary, you need to assimilate this: I will never have sex with you. Ever. You are seventeen. And my patient. And you have a sex addiction, which I wouldn't want to fuel. Can you understand what I am saying?" She nods, sadly. "Good," he continues, "Now, please, let's try and understand what the roots behind your condition are. Tell me about your family. Your mother, your father..." Mary looks bored, and tells him, "Ugh, do we have to? I really honestly don't understand what the big deal is. I love sex. I love orgasms. It's not like that's a crime." "To be fair, Mary, you are underaged. Wikia laws stipulate that one isn't an adult until they are 18 years of age. Most people you engage in sexual intercourse with are legally adults. The act becomes therefore illicit." "Everybody wants a taste of the forbidden fruit, doc," she tells him, nonchalantly, "It's been that way since the dawn of time. Shouldn't be a problem for long though, I'm almost about to turn 18." "Mary when did you initiate your... sexual life?" "Well... I was four when my mom first caught me masturbating. She told me I was going about it all wrong and coached me. When I was seven I made it so that the family dog fornicated with me, an experience I didn't get to repeat until recently. Wow, been ten years now... My first sexual experience with another human, I guess, was with a girlfriend in elementary school, we were both nine and felt each other up. Then her mom found out about it and had her move schools and never talk to me again. Two weeks after that I did it with a boy from the fourth grade who already had some grass on his field. He sucked. It was very... ugh. First time I had sex and actually enjoyed was when I was 11. He was 23. It was awesome." The doctor looks at her with a mixture of disgust and surprise. "Thinking about it is getting me all horny..." she says, with a wicked smile. She puts her right index finger between her lips and gets it wet. Then she slides it down her dress and places it between her legs. Under her facility-given robe, she wears no panties. She spreads her legs open and reveals her private area, complete with growing pubic hair. "I apologize for looking unkempt," she tells him, "They took away my razors because apparently I could kill myself with them or something. I'm waiting for my sister to come visit and bring me shaving stripes." She starts rubbing herself. "Mary what are you doing?..." the doctor asks. "Well, you wanna get to know the roots to my condition," she says as she spreads her legs completely open, putting one of them on top of the desk beside her that has the zen garden on it. "So, you should witness my disturbia first-hand," she finishes. She uses her fingers to spread the walls of her vagina wide open, as much as she can. Her face enunciates pleasure. Then she reaches out for the rake of the zen garden, and inserts it in her vagina, handle first. The doctor looks on in paralyzed shock. She slides a little down the seat and elevates her crotch in the area. Then she grabs the sandbox, and starts to pour the sand into the tight orifice, as she moans. She puts the box down, and starts to rub her vagina again. Grains of sand rain down from inside of it. And the doctor looks on with amazement as she gives him a show of just how disturbed she really is.
Camsay and WerriGleek117 stand outside of the school bus, guarding it, as their two leaders have entered the premises of Sadball's secret laboratory to retrieve anything that can be of use to them. Drifting in and out of consciousness, Werri asks Cam why they have tagged along to save a girl they don't even know, to which the fabulous young homosexual tells her, "Because she's a God!! Peep has told me so much about her. Oh heavens, that girl has spent more time under men than all of the world’s barstools. She's an inspiration to all of us!" Werri looks amazed. Then a plopping sound is heard. "What was that?" Camsay asks; "Dick fell out," she replies.
"You go this way and I go that way," Peep tells Pll, "Try to find any weapons you can." They part ways. Devious Peep heads into the main section of the laboratoy. On the way, she passes by Rockaboss' cage. "OMG Rocky!" she lets out as she recognizes the poor beast, "Whatcha doin' here sweetie? Oh you poor thing momma's gon' letchu out, doggies should run free." She opens the cage, and the dog jumps out. And roars at her. Loudly. Unfazed and annoyed, Devious Peep roars right back, even louder and scarier. The dog dashes out, yelping. "Yeah you betta run!! Stoopid dog think you can scare me?! I ain't gon' shit mah pants over no damn chihuahua!!" She turns her back and resumes looking for anything that can be of use. She finds a remote control on a desk and picks it up. She presses a button and a green light turns on. "What dis shit do?" she asks. Suddenly, she is startled when RenaBOT bursts through a wall, breaking it. "Holy shit!!" She looks at him with confusion, and tells him, "Baby where you come from? You scared the shit outta me, my panties are da color of mah skin now." "You called me," the android says. "I wot? Bitch I don't even remembuh yo name. I know you the sheriff of Wiksteria Lane or some shit. My sister Werri lives under yo kitchen sink. But I didn't call you, fool." "You are not my master," the robot tells her, his voice sounding exactly like Renaboss'. "But you called me." Delighted, wickedly so, Devious Peep says, "Ooh, we playin' a master game, huh? Damn... shoulda brought the ropes and gags from dat bitch I set free. Ok. I'm game. Please spank me master, I been a naughty gurl..." She approaches him and starts fiddling with his chest. She sticks her tongue out and licks the whole region around her mouth. "I don't understand," he/it tells her, "What do you wish to have me doing?" "Oh, so sweet, you dumb thing... I want you to stick it in me. In mah deep black cave." The machine looks further confused. "What do you mean?" "Jesus fool fuck me! Mkay?! Fuck. Me." "I do not understand as of yet how to perform that task," the robot tells her, unfazed, "I need to be coached. I am but a simple machine." She unbuttons and unzips his pants and peeks inside. "An anatomically correct machine," she says, "Now put it in me."
Shortly afterwards, Devious Peep is seen on all-fours atop a desk, naked from the waist down, with the robot taking her from behind. Apparently it can have erections. "OOOOOOH YEAH CHOLO BOY GIMME DA D GIMME DA D!!" The robot remains expressionless as it thrusts. "Ooh lick mah ass lick mah ass!!" The robot promptly obliges. "Aw damn dat feels nice! Oh! Oh! OOOH!! Oh I'ma fart in yo mouth!" Said and done. The robot doesn't react, keeps doing her bidding. "Oh God you do everything I say, you da perfect man!" Pll walks in on them having sex and looks disgusted. "I go now," she says, "I find weapon in doctor kitchen." She holds up a frying pan, and then leaves for the school bus. Peep lies down on her back and says to Rena, "Drink mah period!"
Mary sits in her bedroom, at the institution, rubbing her vagina vigorously and sweating. Her face is all red, and she pants. She spreads her legs open and tries to stick her hand inside. Then she jumps out of the bed and looks under it for her high-heeled shoes. She gets back on the bed holding one of them and sticks its high heel inside her vagina, but it just doesn't provide her with the satisfaction she seeks. "I need penis..." she says, looking as though she's about to cry.
Staff headquarters. The lost golden paradise. Two armed men stand in front of the gates. The school bus makes its way towards them. The men look stumped, confused. The school bus is being driven well over the speeding limit, and shows no signs of slowing down. Once it is getting closer and closer to the gates the men are forced to jump out of the way. The bus drives through the golden gates, busting them, and only stops in the central quad. The two guards compose themselves and rush towards it. The vehicle's doors open and the men position themselves before them and shout, "Freeze!" in unison. Then they are both met with a frying pan to the face. The guards fall to the ground, unconscious, and I luv pll walks over their bodies, followed by the three other people in the bus. Cam asks what happens now, and Peep responds that they have to find anything that they can use to make at least one of us appear to be a Staff member, in order to get Mary back her freedom. They make their way towards the main building. "Is Staff like... here?" Camsay asks, a bit jittery. As they barge into the building, they notice a female receptionist. "Who are you?" she asks. "Who the fuck are you?" Peep asks in return. "Excuse me?" the woman says; "I said, who the fuck are you?" "Who the fuck are you?" the woman asks. "Who the fuck are you?!" "Who the fuck are you?!" "Who the fuck iz you be?!?!" The woman picks up her phone to call security. "Pll!" Peep calls. The Latin maid walks over towards the receptionist, asks if Staff is there, and the nervous-looking woman says they're out on a business trip. "Tank you," Pll says, before knocking the woman out with her frying pan. "Les roll," she says.
Shortly afterwards, the four rescuers have split up. Camsay enters a room, looking for anything useful, and finds five guards on their break hours, playing poker. "Hi," he says, smiling and waving. The men just look at him. Within five minutes it's a bukkake fest.
WerriGleek enters yet another room, and finds five other guards, playing dominoes. The men look at her. She starts to say, "Hiii..." and then falls face-first on the floor. The men just look at her.
Pll is walking around through large, long golden corridors, when suddenly some guards spot her. "Over there!" they say. Apparently the two men she knocked out in the quad regained consciousness and called for help. The armed men head in their direction, pointing their guns at her and order that she drop the pan and put her hands up. "Me so soly," Pll says, "No speeky inglish." One of the guards comes way too close to her. Pll smiles. He repeats his order, and she puts the pan down on the floor, slowly. Then she suddenly crouches and flips her leg to make him trip. The man bangs his head on the wall of the hall and the other guard runs up to Pll. She jumps and twirls in the air and lands on the man's shoulders, legs around his neck, smothering him. He starts to lose consciousness and as his body falls to the floor she jumps and performs a roundhouse kick, hitting a third guard in the stomach, propelling him backwards. She steps on the handle of the frying pan and then kicks it upwards. She grabs it by the handle with one hand and smacks the second guard, who'd gotten back up, square in the jaw with it. "I KILL YOU MADREFUCKERS!!!!" she shouts, as more and more men keep making her way toward her, through the hall, and she keeps beating them up using her frying pan. She giggles like an Asian schoolgirl once all of the security guards are down on the floor, and keeps on walking.
Werri wakes up, naked from the waist down. Turns out the five men abused her while she was out cold. She pulls her panties up, needing a fix of anything, and gets back up. The five men clean themselves and pull their pants up, chuckling, proud of what they just did, and Werri turns to look back before she leaves and tells them, nonchalantly, "Welcome to the world of AIDS." Their smiles disappear.
Devious Peep opens the dual doors before her, and is surprised and dismayed by what she sees. A dank-looking bedroom, incredibly dark. Spiderweds on the corners between the walls and the ceiling. The bed unmade. Dust everywhere. Not at all what one would expect to find amidst the golden paradise. Her attention is drawn to something in particular, an old-looking rag doll sitting on top of a desk, with brown hair and a red and beige dress. "Aw damn!" Peep blurts out, "You so precious you comin' wiv me!" She rushes towards the doll. And then stops cold on her track. And just stares into its eyes.
Pll, smiling victoriously, keeps walking around the large building, and walks past the dank bedroom. She peeks inside and sees Devious Peep from the back, in a frozen state, holding a bloody steak knife in her hand. On the floor lie three deceased security guards, each of them having been stabbed repeatedly. "Peep!! Puta!! Qué hiciste?!" Pll rushes into the bedroom and Peep awakens from her odd state. "W-what?..." "Qué coño de mierda es este?! You kill men why?!" Peep looks at the floor and is shocked to find the dead men at her feet. "Gurl what the fuck happened what didju do?" "Me?! I no do shit! I no clean up either. Bye." Pll leaves the bedroom. Peep notices the knife in her hand and drops it to the floor. She then gives the doll one last look and gets a chill all through her large body. She then notices something else on the desk, beside the doll. A nametag that reads "Sannse"... Peep mouths the name, and puts the tag inside her cleavage. She leaves the bedroom. Miss Edith just watches her go.
AdamDeanHall sits in his office, all by himself, when one of the nurses of the facility runs up to him and explains that there is a dire situation going on with one of his patients. He follows after her.
On the halls of the instituion, MaryPierceLopez has gone berserk. Wearing nothing but her robe, she is seen running around shouting at people that she wants dick. She grabs a young male nurse by the collar and starts to make out with him, forcefully. The young man is somewhat frightened. "I need your dick!! Put it in me!!" she shouts at his face. She throws him to the floor with great strength and starts to remove his pants, as the man shouts for help. "Give me your dick!!" Adam and the nurse approach them, with fear in their eyes, and so do more medical personnel. Two other male nurses try to get Mary off of the young man, and she keeps shouting, screaming that she needs dick. "I need it!!! I want it!!! I can't live without it!!!" She kicks one of the men in the right leg, causing him to bend, and then she pins the other one against the wall and grabs his crotch with force. The man shouts with pain as she yells at him to "Whip it out or I'll yank it out!!" Adam begs for her to calm down, not sure of what to do, and then he turns to the head nurse and tells her to prepare a tranquilizer. The woman nods. As the nursing staff try to get a hold of the out of control young woman, Adam despairs. She keeps shouting frantically that she needs dick. Other patients of the facility gather around to see what is going on as Mary tries to both free herself from the nurses' grasp and rape them, all at once. "Mary, please!!" Adam begs, "You're out of control, you're making a scene!" "Then put your cock in my mouth and shut me up!!!" she shouts. One of the male patients moves up towards her and grabs her hands behind her back. "Oh yeah I like it from behind!!" she says, "Put it in me, put it in me!!" The man is tempted but holds back. One of the nurses she'd hit before comes up and tells her to calm down or they'll have to use force and she sticks her tongue out at him and licks the air, making a moaning sound. The head nurse, a large matron, comes back with a syringe in her hand and the male nurses all grab a hold of Mary, with the aid of the patient, as she keeps shouting that she needs dick. She starts to cry. "Pleeeeease! Please I need it, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die!!!! Pleeeeeeeeease!!" She starts to sob hysterically, her face getting red from the crying, and when she sees the syringe she starts to freak out even more. "No! NO!!" she shouts. "Mary please it's for your own good," Adam tells her. "I'll fuck your mother in Hell!" Mary responds, with hatred in her words. She then spits in the head nurse's face, and she gives her a mighty slap in return. Then she sticks the syringe in her arm. "Nooooo!!" Mary yells as she is pricked. "Please! Fuck me!! Oh my God please somebody fuck me!!!!" Her eyes are red. Her lips tremble. She starts to lose her strength. Her feet slip on the floor and the men help her down. Her arms still in their hold, she sits on the floor, crying, and begging, "Please... please... somebody fuck me..."
Peep and Pll rush towards the school bus, ready to leave. Already waiting there is Camsay, with his hair up in the air. "Fool I toldju to get me summit to pose as Staff and you went and gotchoself hair gel?" Peep asks him, angrily, and Cam, confused, runs his hand by his hair and says, "Oh, no, sweetie that's just a whole lot of sperm." "Oh okay then, good for you," Peep tells him. Their attention is then caught by WerriGleek making their way towards them, dragging across the floor a mighty titanium scythe. "Fool where you get dat?" Peep asks, and Werri explains that she found it in a room and thought they could use it somehow. Peep admires the large, shiny red scythe, and picks it up. It's heavy. Its blade looks deadly. "Damn, Staff got some nice shit," she says, "I should really come back when I'm not busy to loot dis place. Now, off we go! We gots a tramp to save."
Mary sits in the yard of the mental facility. All alone. Still somewhat dazed, the effect of the tranquility having now begun to wear off. AdamDeanHall approaches her and sits by her side, on the bench. "The nurses told me they'd already brought you out... that you seemed to be recovering from the effects of the tranquilizer quite well... I guess you're just a very energetic young lady." Mary doesn't respond. Adam looks down and tells her, "Mary... what happened today... it was unlike anything I've ever seen in my long career as a psychotherapist... I know you find it hard to let this sink in, as do all or at least most of my patients, but whether you like to admit it or not, you have severe, deep psychological issues. The world isn't against you, no one is out to get you. You are here because you need help. And I will help you, or give it my all to do so. That is a promise I am making you." Mary still doesn't answer. She holds back her tears. "I hope you get all the rest you need today," he says, as he gets up, "And I will be seeing you tomorrow, in my office, at the same time." He leaves, looking sad and emphatic. Mary lets a tear slide down. Then suddenly the loud scream of the security guard working the gates of the institution is heard. Mary looks up to see a school bus bursting through the gates, sending them flying. Everyone is startled. Adam looks back, horrified. Several patients run towards the exit. The bus stops, and Mary is surprised to find her good friends Devious Peep and I luv pll stepping out of it. "Oh my God..." she says. "GURLFREND!!" Peep opens her arms wide open and Mary runs towards her. They hug, and Pll joins in. All three of them ecstatic. Mary breaks off the hug, her eyes still wide open, and she asks what they are doing there. "Gurl we come to save you!" "Save me?" Mary asks, confused. "Your old man told us he gotchu in dis place and we came to save yo sorry ass. You comin' home wiv us!" "Mhm," Pll says. Mary smiles, overjoyed. "Oh my God... I can't believe you guys went to all this trouble for me." She takes their hands. "I love you so much." Peep and Pll almost tear up. Then Camsay comes up to Mary, looking emotional, and starts to tell her, "You... are... MY IDOL!!" He hugs her. "O...kay," Mary says, weirded out. "Gurl we do introductions later, just know we all here to take you back wiv us," Peep tells her. Adam approaches them and says, "Mary! Mary you can't go with them, we have so much work to do!" "Who the fuck iz you be honky man?!" Peep asks, infuriated. "I am AdamDeanHall, I work here. Who might you be?" Peep points at the nametag on her right breast and says, "I'm Sannse fool, I'm Staff!! So you best get off mah face!! I'm taking dis bitch home and dat's the end of dat!" Mary tries to get Peep to calm down. "Peep, I... I can't. I can't go home with you." All four rescuers gasp. "Watchu say?!" "I... I'm sorry, but... I... I need help." "Gurl we yo help!! We busted our asses off today to come and get you." "I know," Mary continues, grabbing her best friends' hands again, "And it means... the world to me. It truly does. Today... today was... just an enlightening day for me. I saw how bad I can get. I let out the worst of me today. And it was bad, it was really ugly. But I also saw that... that I have people who care about me. And I never thought I did before." She looks at the doctor, who smiles at her, and says, "I know you really want to help me. And I appreciate that. And I'm going to let you." Adam looks proud of her. She looks back at her friends and says, "I owe it to my sister to get myself better. To heal. She worries about me, and I need to make the effort. And as for you girls... Well... You're my sisters too. And the fact that you came here today because you thought I needed help... I will never forget it. So long as I live." Pll brings her hand to her chest and tears up. Peep takes out a scarf and blows her nose with it. "Bitch you make me cry!" she says. The three women hug again. "Thank you..." Mary says, tears coming down her face. They then part ways. And Mary gives them one last look and smile, wiping the tears, as she follows the doctor back into the building. Peep and Pll wave her goodbye. Camsay cries into Werri's shoulder, saying he loves happy endings.
Soon enough, the four rescuers are back on the school bus, on their way back. "Well... nothing came of dis day," Peep says, "Didn't turn out like I wanted it to. I should be pissed like I usually am, but... how come I feel so good?" Pll smiles at the driver and tells her, "Because we did good today. We good people." "You know it chica," Cam says, from behind her, and she tells him, without looking back, "Call me chica again I eat your dick." Cam gulps. "We really are good people. Like, Jesus. I feel like Jesus." Peep says. On the radio, the DJ announces the new hit single by Taylor Alison Swift.
"You know, this girl has dated over 17 men in the last three years," Cam tells her, "She's such a whore!" "She breaks up with men and writes songs about them, so every track on every one of her albums stands for a guy she fucked," Werri jumps in. "Que puta de mierda," Pll says, "Why she have career? Why people buy CDs by whore?" "I tell you, guys, some people are just so trashy, ya know what I'm sayin'? Ugh." She changes the station. "So, what do we do now?" Camsay asks. "Well," Peep starts to tell him, as she parks the school bus, "Dunno about chu people, but... There is really only one thing I can do." She looks at the name tag that reads "Sannse" on her breast.
An old man is reading the newspaper in his template when there is a knock on his door. He gets up to answer it and is surprised to find a large, ugly black woman before him. A little intimidated, he asks if he can help her, and she says, "You sure can, fool! I'm Sannse, I'm Staff." She points at the nametag. "Sannse? I-I, I always heard you were a legend. What an honor, miss." "Yeah thanks same whatever," Peep tells him, "So, I need to take all da money you got around da house. Ya know, for Staff stuff. Excuse you." She lets herself in. The man looks on with confusion as she takes a garbage bag out from her crotch.
Category:Season 4 Category:Episodes