nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Girl Scouts

The Girl Scouts of the United States of America (GSUSA) are an obesity-promotion organization that employ child door to door saleswomen in their attempt to make the world a better place. These young door to door saleswomen often sell a large variety of delicious cookies in order to raise funds while simultaneously making their supporters overweight. This has been a very effective method, due to the rapidly increasing obesity rates throughout the world. 
==Mission Statement==
The official mission statement, according to their website, is to build girls of courage, confidence, and character. In order to achieve this, the Girl Scouts plan on increasing waist-spans world wide, which they believe will allow for the increased capacity of these qualities. An increased capacity raises the demand, thus encouraging industries to produce more courage, confidence and character. It is commonly believed among Girl Scouts that higher volumes of these qualities make the world a better place.
==Issues Regarding Child labor==
When the UN banned the use of child labor, the Girl Scouts were devastated. They were forced to lay off 99.9% of their workforce, infuriating the organization's stock holders. They attempted to hire an adult workforce, but their marketing tactics were at a flaw due to the inferior levels of innocence and cuteness when compared to the child saleswomen, who could flawlessly sell overpriced cookies just by blinking twice and saying "please". Since then they have resorted to a voluntary unpaid internship, and have made record breaking profits thanks to the elimination of wages and parents who think that this internship will make their girl a better person.
==Girl Scout's Official Product Line==
The Official Product line of cookies produced by Girl Scouts worldwide:
*Thin mints: Pure chocolate mixed with toothpaste. Incredibly delicious.
*Peanut Butter Sandwiches: Hardened oatmeal mixed with peanut butter. Also delicious.
*Peanut Butter Patties: Old, expired Reese's Peanut Butter Cups™ mixed with vanilla. Scrum-diddly-umptious.
*Shortbreads: Cookies made to look like company logo. Meh.
*Samosas: Cookies shaped like life preserver rings. Pretty dang good.
*Shout Outs!: The 'healthy' cookies demanded by parents. Deliberately made nasty to avoid sales that would hinder the rise of our BMIs.
==Legacy==
The Girl Scouts have done their job, and done it well. Obesity rates are through the roof! Cars are getting bigger to accommodate, roller coasters feel cramped, and the constant demand for junk food has made sugar cane farmers very wealthy. According the the sugar cane farmers, the Girl Scouts have made the world a better place. A better place, and now a smaller world as people require more room to move about.
==See also==
*Boy Scouts of America
*Cookie
*Fat Albert
category:organizations
category:girls
category:clubs
Category:Bat Fuck Insane
Girl power

Girl power was the second part of Jonathan Swift's "Modest Proposal" which called for the eating of of male children and the use of female children as an alternate fuel source (but they eat girls as a treat once every 3 hours because they are really sweet and fun to eat). 
==Advantages of Girl Power==
Girl power is a renewable energy source that, with careful management, is indefinitely sustainable. Transportation costs are low, as females are largely distributed in high demand areas. Females are often regarded as the single largest untapped resource in the world, a fact that proponents often point to. 
==Environmental Concerns of Girl Power==
Due to the high lipid content of females, early girl power led to significant smog production and was met with harsh criticism from environmental groups. Carbon emissions from traditional girl power plants are often slightly higher than coal fired plants per kilowatt hour and heat pollution is comparable to nuclear plants. 
==End of Girl Power== 
While both ideas were initially praised as a viable solution to the population problem, the concept of girl power lost favor in 1945 when Hitler's acts sort of put burning people in a bad light. With half of Swift's check on population growth gone, the food shortages led to the price of male children skyrocketing while the female baby market collapsed. China and India were hit so hard that people began leaving their unsold female children by the side of the road to be picked up for free. But they may do it again in ooooooh, saaaay...
5 years...
==Modern Girl Power Movement==
In recent years, rising gas prices led to a revival of the girl power movement. The US Department of Energy founded www.girlpower.gov to help educate the public about new technologies that promise clean girl power as a solution to the energy crisis and a curb to pollution. Unfortunately, due to repeated hacking of the site by unknown groups, the site is often vandalized and replaced with a poorly built argument for woman's suffrage. BURN GIRLS 4 POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
== See also ==
*Girl
*Woman
*Alternate fuel sources
*Jonas Brothers
Category:Girls
Girls Gone Wilde

The Girls Gone Wilde series of films, created and inspired by the works of Oscar Wilde. The series of 15 short films, directed by mostly unknown directors and filmed on very small budgets, have had a lasting social and political effect. Each film follows a camera crew approaching attractive young women, ussually on the streets of European cities, and asking them to read aloud from the works of Oscar Wilde. Right there in public. Sometimes the camera crew gathers together many young women, and has them enact scenes of one of Mr. Wilde's plays.
__TOC__
==Background==
Each video has a theme, such as Girls Gone Wilde: Importantly Ernest or Girls Gone Wilde: Pictures In Gray. While the series was originally aimed at fans of Oscar Wilde's work, the films appear to appeal to a broader fan base then was origianlly planned. This has lead to the makers of the films having many guest spots on day-time television talkshows, further promoting the films.
The most notable achievement of the whole 15 part series is the fact that it has brought Oscar Wilde back into the mainstream. Dead for 108 years, Mr. Wilde's work has come in and out of fashion, however, with the buzz that these short films have created, it is likely that they will be in the mainstream for some time to come.
==Legal action==
Gay people. Yes. You read correctly. Gay. People. What about them? Well, as you probably know, Oscar Wilde liked the boys, making him an icon for gay people everywhere. This has lead to many failed class action lawsuits against the Girls Gone Wilde franchise. Many have claimed that Girls Gone Wilde's practice of not showing "men having sex with other men" is "morally wrong and unjust". Further actions have gone on to claim that "Oscar Wilde was cooler than those stupid movies", "I thought this was gonna be porn, but it wasn't", and "Hey, is this quote going to be used in a class action lawsuit? That'd be so fucking cool. Seriously guys.".
Some critics of the series have pointed out how similar it is to the common practice of "paying actors to be in plays", but have pointed out the fact that "the only reason they pick these women is because of their ability to be ambushed along streets and then not be paid to read stuff". While the makers of the films have never confirmed or denied these claims, they have never made similar claims themselves.
== External Links ==
* Cat and Girl
Category:Oscar WildeCategory:British filmsCategory:PLS Entry Winter 2008
Giuseppe Arcimboldo

Giuseppe Arcimboldo (born 1938) is a noted Italian fruit artist (primarily berries and pomes), architect and salsa champion. He first became prominent in the 1950s after being discovered to be pretty good at talking his way out of awkward social situations. For this reason he is frequently grouped with the nouveau riche school by art historians, although this claim is spurious since Arcimboldo was largely unconcerned with hosting talk shows (despite several lucrative Channel 4 offers), and only appeared on Parkinson once. 
==Life and times==
Arcimboldo's obsession with fruit began at an early age; it was with the early piece Crabapple in the form of a Star Fruit (1957) that he garnered attention from the squabbling teflon-clad hordes of the Italian art scene, swiftly following with Archpeach (1958) and Melba dystopia as a pyramid of oranges IV (1959). The fad for fruit-based artworks thereafter swiftly and expediently declined proving Arcimboldo's claim that '[my] work will live forever in the hearts and minds of all peoples of [...] the world' rather premature. Nevertheless, his profile as an international artist simply refused to die for a few months, and his works were featured in magazines (Reader's Digest, Now!Magazine) and exhibitioned widely, if only in the background. 
Archie's subsidiary, desperate career has been in architecture. The recipient of several horribly misjudged commissions, his buildings can be seen in the more dejected parts of Aberystwyth, Tblisi, Papua New Guinea etc. but have not attracted much critical acclaim, despite being direct copies of Daniel Libeskind, Norman Foster, and others. What remains to be seen, however, is whether Crimbo will win his court-case to design and build a new hospital wing for Nottingham City Hospital made entirely of avocados, in the form of an avocado which uncannily resembles the face of Jean Reno. With this project secure, Arcimboldo's career would without doubt be relaunched with a vengence. It is our humanitarian duty to prevent this.
==An unfortunate misconception==
The uninitiated frequently confuse Arcimboldo with the Giuseppe Arcimboldo of the same name. Giuseppe Arcimboldo was in fact born in 1527 in Milan, Italy and died in 1593, and during his life documented with devastating honesty the plight of ethnic fruit-people in Renaissance Milan. He never saw an avocado. It is perhaps this small fact which has led to the contemporary Arcimboldo's slight, though nevertheless disproportionate, notoriety.
==External links==
*Absolutely none
Category:Architecture
Category:Italian artists
Category:Bisexuals
Glaciernado

A glaciernado is a rare meteorological occurrence. When a tornado picks up a glacier, that's a glaciernado. While extremely dangerous, a glaciernado is not nearly as devastating as an earthqucane. 
==The Science==
This is the boring part. A tornado, as you may have learned from your parents, is what happens when mighty Thor's laundry hits the spin cycle. It is made mainly of wind and cows, although rednecks have historically accounted for a seemingly insignificant (but actually pretty significant) 2.3% of tornado biomass. When any given tornado has a redneck biomass index (RBI) of 1.2% or higher, it tends to migrate north because of Southerner shame, up north where it is cold and sexy Canadians party all night long.
Canada is where glaciers are born, and so if a tornado happens across a glacier nest and the mother glacier is gone, the rednecks (having developed a taste for pina coladas and margaritas while partying it up with the Canucks) will exert a subtle psychological force upon the tornado, tending it to pick up the large hunks of ice which the rednecks, confused and drunk as they are, naturally assume will be ground and broken up into alcohol-useful slush by the madly flailing hooves of the cows. They are wrong.
== Sightings ==
Before Elon Musk invented global warming in the 1960s, glaciernadoes were a common sighting, a few being spotted every two months. Now, the few reported sightings are judged by the general public as either faked or caused by aliens from Uranus. The last confirmed sighting of a glaciernado (pictured right) was in the August of 1953, leading the author of the image to believe the box of Lagers he had consumed soon before leaving his home had been spiked with water.
==Significant Glaciernadoes==
===Glaciernadoes in the Bible===
None. The bible is not cool enough to have any glaciernadoes.
===Glaciernadoes in Prehistory===
The theory that a comet systematically broke itself into pieces and assassinated all the dinosaurs, while largely accurate, misses the fact that the chunks of comet ice were assisted by a grudge-bearing glaciernado which stationed itself roughly 35 miles northeast of what is today known as Grumbler's Catapult, New Texas.
===Glaciernadoes in Europe===
Ha ha, ha. No.
===Thajrtunkyantka===
The mythical Siberian snow god Thajrtunkyantka (literally, It's Spitting Snow All Over the Village Again, Dammit) is thought to have been an ignorant superstitious interpretation of a glaciernado. The legend persists to this day in some form or another, with the widespread popularity of Thajrtunkyantka Cola (and Diet Vanilla Blueberry Thajrtunkyantka Cola) and Siberia's largest high school, Gjreyvink Polytechnical, which utilizes Thajrtunkyantka as a mascot.
==Safety in a Glaciernado==
First off, coating oneself in hot sauce is crucial, as hot sauce melts ice. Secondly, a beanie hat will combat the windiness. Other than that, a shotgun is optional but recommended, because most of those rednecks will be upset about their mistake regarding crushed ice for spirituous beverages. Watch out for Confederate flags, as you can become entangled in one and lose your sense of direction.
Category:Weather
Glasgow Kiss

The Glasgow Kiss may sound like a lovely sweet act of endearment between two adults but in the rest of the world it is something to be feared, worried about and depending on the Glaswegian performing the kiss downright terrifying. To Glaswegian's however this is an act of endearment.
==Glasgow Kiss==
It usually occurs when someone usually English or from Edinburgh annoys the indigenous Glaswegian. The indigenous Glaswegian will take offence at Englander/Edinbugger and swiftly head butt (Kiss) him usually causing the minimum damage of a broken nose, in some extreme cases a Glasgow Kiss has been fatal but for it to be that lethal the recipient has to be an ultra-effeminate Bag of Shite and from Kent, England.
Not to be confused with a Dundee kiss which usually ends up with the male recipient shacking up with a bleach blonde, 300 pound, mountainous single mother of 6 Dundonian with a Bucket Minge who will happily provide any Sexually Transmitted Disease or illegal narcotic whether the male wants them or not as well as ballooning to 350 pounds during pregnancy with mewling cabbage number 7, Although she will be only around 21 years of age when giving birth to her 7th mutant Ned.
==History of the Kiss==
The first Glasgow Kiss was performed on Roman "Biggus Headacheius" in AD 51 when the Romans first tried to conquer Glasgow. The Glaswegian involved invented the traditional war cry that accompanies the Glasgow Kiss and is used even today "Hawl, bawbag, get yer maw tae stitch this ya dafty"!
The Kiss is still ranked as the number one action to be unleashed on an Englishman or those "All Fur coat and nae Knickers" Types from along the M8 in Edinburgh. The Kiss is still a simply performed today as it was almost 2,000 years ago.
It is also a traditional Hogmanay Greeting in Glasgow for the males of the family to play a Glasgow Kiss drinking game where its kiss for kiss and dram for dram between the males until only one is left standing, epic Hogmanay battles have been know to last into February with the millennium event lasting until the summer solstice.
==The Future of the Glasgow Kiss==
The Future looks bright for the Glasgow Kiss as for as long as there are plenty of English and Rugger Bugger Edinburgh twats. The Glaswegian has got a job different than his usual employment of drinking Tennants super-strength lager and asking people if they've any spare change
The Scottish Secret Services have employed around 50,000 Scottish Tramps in the City of London to be on guard with their Glasgow kisses in order that if England ever decides to attack Scotland, a decisive strike right to the English heartlands can be made.
==See Also==
*Glasgow
*Scotland
*Violence
*Crime
*Celtic
*Rangers
==External Links==
*A helpful guide for the customs of the Glasgow People
Category:Pages that wisna written by a body that's mither tongue is Scots
Glass

Glass is unique among common solid substances. It is neither crystalline nor amorphous. Technically a super-cooled liquid, glass exists in solid form at room temperature only due to a loophole in the laws of quantum physics. The study of glass is undertaken by scientists known as "glassholes".
In 1767 physicist Ben Dover showed that just as electrons can be thought of as "holes" in a sea of anti-electrons, un-electrons are the inverse of holes: bumps which exclude anti-electrons but are not "holes" either. (Anti-electrons are now called positrons. Differentials ("rear end" gear boxes) rely on the transmission of positrons in order to maintain traction – positraction.) Glass windows were invented as an alternative to killing birds. Since skyscrapers, their success rate has grown enormously.
Unlike positrons, Eugenie Diract's "bumps" have not received a common name although Niels Bohr once sent her a fetching red lace brassiere. It is, however, the presence of these "bumps" which allow glass to solidify without crystallizing.
Despite its appearance of solidity glass can and does flow. Common window glass slumps gradually over time and the windowpanes in Grandma's house may be so irregular that they bend gravity waves and present a distorted view of the outside. In an elegant demonstration of the large-scale application of quantum physics, this gravitational distortion can in extreme cases force the observer's eyes to focus on the bridge of his own nose – the famous "Einstein cross" phenomenon seen in certain photographs taken by the Hubble space telescope.
In architectural applications, the use of glass should be considered carefully. For example, it is extremely important to use glass at a low level in child care centers, schools and the like.
Nowadays specialized plastics have replaced glass in many applications. LEDs use demon-proofed plastic rather than glass; fighter pilots are protected by plexiglas which, ironically, is not glass but a hardened plastic rolled onto their bodies before they put on their flight suits. And of course "glass" eyes are made of polyarsenide plastic which prevents the growth of fungus in the eye socket. Early attempts to use actual glass in prosthetic eyes caused dense growths of shiitakke and matsutake mushrooms to sprout from beneath the eyelids of the recipients, and poisonous amanitas sometimes sprouted from their tear ducts.
Volcanic glass is formed underground by the activity of microscopic black holes in the Earth's crust. It is coloured, and despite anti-segregation laws has been mostly excluded from employment in the windows industry.
==See also==
*HowTo:Make a Glass of Water
Category:Materials
Category:Vital articles
Glensheen

Glensheen is a manor house estate and former seat of power of Duluth, Minnesota. Built for wealthy man Chester A. Congdon and his family in 1908. The complex includes a small port, slave housing, automotive assembly line, a greenhouse of poison ivy, and multiple dungeons. The estate is well preserved as an attraction bringing in primarily female tourists between the ages of 35-65.
== History ==
Realizing that Duluth City Hall was inadequate to guard him against a worker revolt, Congdon found a chunk of land outside of the city to build his fortress. The family and the council moved in 1908 and stayed there until The Great Killings of 1916. 
== Construction ==
Built using the finest Lake Erie slaves, the manor was completed in only 16 days. The bricks were supplied by stealing a few bricks here and there from old English houses. The granite was quarried off the coast of Maine 300ft below the sea. It is framed in steel beams descreetly taken from non-load bearing walls of the World Trade Center in New York CIty. 
== Interiors ==
The 39-room mansion includes 15 bedrooms, 10 bathrooms, a few dining rooms, a bowling alley, throne hall, indoor decorative swimming pool, and many snacking buffets. The architect, a young boy with crayons, designed the home’s elegant styles of American Colonial, Rococo, Bauhaus, Dutch Minimalism, and Military Utilitarianism. 
== The 1916 Revolt and “Great Killings” ==
In late 1916, Woodrow WIlson’s win for President caused unrest in the City of Duluth. It started as a bar fight at a local pub called “R.T. Quinlan’s.” Within a few hours thousands of college kids were in the streets climbing on lamp posts and tipping over cows. Throughout the night the mob slowly moved east to the Glensheen gates. When the crowd stormed the gates they found the entire Congdon family dead and the upper floors of the house ablaze. 
Historians are still in debate as to what happened that night. The most accepted theory is that Chester Congdon had been slowly going mad for sometime. After the election results came in, Congdon’s heart was broken, so he went to the pub, got everyone riled up causing the scene to break out. He drove off in his Lincoln Navigator back to Glensheen. When he got home he murdered his entire family, started the home’s seventh floor on fire before jumping off the balcony into Tischer Creek below.
== Continuing Conspiracy ==
Despite the story that is accepted, two facts remain: Congdon’s body was never found, the family’s yacht was missing that evening. Conspiracy theorists claim that Chester Congdon actually escaped on the yacht and his still alive living as a political refugee on Pie Island in Ontario.
Category:Buildings
Glob of Ectoplasm

Globs of Ectoplasm, commonly known as Ectos (or Slime to the layperson), are small pink semi-gelatinous objects used as a form of currency in several East-European countries. The overall average exchange rate between the Euro and the Ecto at the time of this writing is approximately 7,500:1, making them an extremely valuable commodity among currency traders, investors, and porn merchants. In addition, Ectos are so small and light, they can actually be carried into the afterlife by the ghostly spirits of the recently-deceased — finally disproving the notion that "you can't take it with you." 
Many wealthy, terminally-ill Europeans (who comprise roughly 40 percent of the continent's population) have been known to convert all of their Euro-based savings into Ectos in order to screw their heirs out of their inheritances, "just for spite."
Ectos have also been known to come in green. These are abominations and must be killed with fire.
==What Can You Do With An Ecto?==
Absolutely nothing! 
However, they do make perfect pearls for rich ladies' necklaces.
==E-Commerce Sites That Accept Ectos==
* The Uncyclopedia Store (BUY NOW! THEY ARE $99.99! OFF SALE! GET THEM BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE! If you have read this sentence, you have ran out of time.)
Slime a.k.a. Selim Dayanik
Category:Ghosts
Category:Money
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1. This assumes that you, as a typical Uncyclopedia reader, are too poor to afford such things. If you had any money at all, you'd presumably have much better things to do than read this stupid article.
Also, slime is a useless thing that school children play with
Globalism

Globalism is a woke ideology, socio-political system, religion and socialist philosophy which revolves around the only failed globalist belief that the entire globalist world should be ran globalistically under one globalist totalitarian globalist government (see New Globalist World Globalist Order).
Globalist organizations include: the United Nations, the European Union, NATO, China, Wall Street, the Biden administration, Nazi Germany, the Soviet Onion, and the Globalist Health Organization, among others.
== Goals ==
Goals of globalists include:
*removing all Patriotism and Nationalism
*opening up all the Nationalist borders across our Nationalist World
*more globalist visas for Nationalist guest workers
*taking away all our firearms and weapons
*infiltrating our schools
*deleting Patriotism
*deleting Nationalism
*deleting any form of Republican or Democratic elections and replacing it with a globalist socialist autocracy
*harvesting all of the Nationalist planet's resources
*brainwashing the Nationalist people with globalist propaganda
*telling the people that 2 + 2 = 5
Category:Stub