Super Mario 62

My name's Jonathan. I am an avid collector of Nintendo games, be it Legend of Zelda, Earthbound, or Pokemon, but my all-time favorite games were the Super Mario games. I had every Super Mario game ranging from the original game to Mario Kart, Super Mario Galaxy, whatever, except for Super Mario 64. I had a copy, but from decades of heavy use, it was utterly decimated. I needed a new copy of Super Mario 64.
I looked out the window and saw that someone down the street was having a yard sale. My interest was peaked when I saw that there were many classic, retro video games for purchase. I decided to try my luck.
I browsed around the yard sale for a minute, taking in the sights, until I finally saw a copy of Super Mario 64. The game was in horrible condition. The label had nearly been peeled off, but I could still make out the flying Mario and the title. The title looked the same, except somebody had written over the 4 in 64 with a silver Sharpie so it said 62 instead. I opened the container. Inside was a note with very little on it. The note looked pretty old. It said, "Test version of SM64. Nearly completed. I have a few bugs too soort oot (illegible) oh no (illegible) i forgot the (very long illegible stretch) c." There were chew marks on the bottom of the page, and a little bit of dried....something. I couldn't tell. I was a little bit weirded out by this note, but then I saw the price tag. Only two cents!
I rushed to the man in charge of the yard sale. He was very old and he was leaning on a walker. I told him I'd like to purchase the Super Mario 64 game. He didn't respond, and he had a frightened look on his face. A drop of sweat rolled down his forehead. Finally he said, "You can have it for free." 
I was starting to get the message that there was something wrong with this game, but foolish me, I played it anyway. After all, what's so harmful about a game, right? Wrong.
I plugged the cartridge, covered in what appeared to be teeth marks, into my N64. The game started up like normal. I pressed start and was taken to the Mario face screen.
The Mario on the start screen had a large, exhuberated grin on its face. Its eyes looked a little "infected" and his mouth was completely black. I was a little unnerved by this, so I tried to change his face, but it wouldn't change. I pressed Start. 
Mario was in an empty room, made out of wood with a large steel pipe through the middle and a single door. He was facing away from the camera and there was a star over his head. I tried to jump and get the star but it followed Mario's motions. It must have been some sort of odd glitch.
I made Mario turn to look at the camera.
Suddenly, everything on the screen turned to a shade of ruby red. The static was horrible, and the image was glitchy. More horrifying, however, was Mario. He had glowing orbs for eyes that had blood pouring out of them, and the star above his head had the same eyes as Mario did. Mario was making the peace sign to the camera. Above him, the lives meter had been replaced with a skull, times an illegible number.
He turned around again. The screen became non-staticky and everything turned back to normal, except for the star above Mario's head. The door opened, and Toadette came walking through it. Mario looked at the camera (at this point I had completely lost control of him) for a brief moment and the static returned, and then he rushed Toadette. The screen went entirely red except for static and various thumping sounds played, the first sounds that I had heard throughout the entire game. Finally, the screen cut to a shot of Toadette, facing away from the camera, with a star above her head. 
Then, Mario rushed the camera and it cut to black. Suddenly, I had a horrible headache, as if thousands of thoughts were simeltaneously trying to burst from my head. I heard screaming voices and static and a horrible, demonic laugh.
I woke up in a room. My entire body felt like it might crumble apart at any second.
Then I realised. I was in the room that Mario had been in, that Toadette had been in, and I turned around. I was greeted by the sight of at least 10 other people, if you can call them people. Their bodies were smouldering, rotting, emaciated. They all looked like rotting corpses. Flaps of skin, festering with maggots, peeled off their bodies  and fell on the floor. They all had stars above their heads.
They stared at me with their soulless eyes, agonized by my sight. Then, I looked down at my hands. I could see every bone. One of my fingers had falled off, another was a cancerous stump. I looked up, and there was a star above my head.
Oh, no, I was not afraid. These people were my friends, my (illegible) here to stay for (illegible) madness and share together (illegible) Mario (illegible)
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Mario
Category:NINTENDO SIXTY-FOOOUR
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Im died
Category:English Class Failure