Lipton’s Journal/Correspondence of Robert Lindner and Norman Mailer/July, 1955

::::::::::::::::::::To Norman Mailer [hand-written]
::::::::::::::::::::[July?] 1955
Dear Norman,
The days go by and I find myself more hard pressed for time to write to you. Today I’m cutting through the crap to do what I’ve been wanting to do for weeks—spend a few minutes with my brother. Bingo, I have missed you. Actually, my inability to write has not been due entirely to other preoccupations, but due to the fact that—I’ve been—as you seem to sense—close to illness with exhaustion. About two weeks before I went to California I picked up a viral infection. Out there I seem to have been able to pickle it in alcohol and burn it to an ember with the excitement. On my return it flared up—busting out this last week with severe gut pain, agonies in my back and chest, and a sort of quacking ague. Over the weekend I loaded myself with stuff and slept almost continuously. Today I’m better—and even have a few ideas. I hope I’ve got it licked—because despite my notorious hypochondria I resent, hate, despise the weaknesses of my body.
Genug!
I got back on the book this morning. There remains to be done only the homo-sexuality paper, the one on character-and-politics, and a general introduction. Rinehart announced it already for January, and I’ve agreed to talk on it at Town Hall on Feb. 8. So I’ve got to hustle to get the ms. in.
The homosexuality paper, in its original form, now seems gibberish to me. I’m going to tear it apart and put it in the perspective of the book, the perspective of conformity. Now I believe immersion in negative rebellion, the compromise between the protestant, evolutionary instinct and the conformist pressure on the erotic desires. Immersion is a way of conforming—and whereas I once thought social attitudes were changing, I now no longer believe that’s so—what’s happening is that our anti-sex culture is forcing more and more persons into homosexuality, in negative rebellion, and the [garbled] now, becoming prevalent, is becoming the new conformist pattern. As you see, the whole thing isn’t entirely clear yet—but the golden nugget is in there someplace. I hope to dig it out in the next few days.
With the book out of the way—I hope in a few weeks—I’m going to knock off writing for the summer. I’ll devote myself, I think, to pushing the schemes for realizing something from previous work, and maybe the new house. About the former, it looks like the plans to rush into production of television films based on The Fifty-Minute Hour will have to be delayed. The problem now seems to be that “spots” on the networks for the next year are all contracted for, and it will be at least a year until room can be made for the program. Meanwhile, abstracts are (so Harold Ober says) being drawn with Maxwell for me to do something similar (provide story synopses and be consultant) for him beginning now. I’ve stalled about it as long as I could, but it looks like the chips are down now and I’ve got to act. I may have to go out to Lost Angeles again soon to get the final details settled—but I’m not going without a real commitment.
The house we’re moving into in August represents something big for all of us. As far as I’m concerned, I’m intending to use it for a real change in my style of life. I’m hoping to alter the pattern somewhat…but this is something we’ll be talking about.
You’ll be surprised, I know, and maybe a little chagrined, to learn that I’ve resigned from my state job as of July 1. No more prison work—and I’m going to miss it. But I had to do it. There was a major change made in the fiscal set-up of the state, a change that would bring my work under the direction of department agencies and people unfriendly to me and my methods. I would be forced, if I remained, to give up my independence and put in a very subordinate position. The best (actually the only) solution was to resign. This I did—although it means reducing my income by about 5 thousand a year—which, however, I can easily make up elsewhere if I wish.
Again—genug!
Now what of you? When I talked with you, and from your note, I gathered you are literally re-writing Deer Park. I hope it’s going well and I’m very eager to see where you come out. As I promised I would, I’ve been talking it up everywhere—trying to create where I can an atmosphere of excited anticipation. For myself, you know I can hardly wait for its publication. 
Jeez, Norman—these pages hardly scratch what I have to tell you and what I want to talk with you about. We’ve simply got to get a few days together. Let me know when you’ll be ready to come down. If I can get this bug out of me and start percolating again, I’ll be in shape to make some plans. Certainly you’ve got to get here before you go West.
Cy and Billie will be coming down this weekend. Since we’re not going to Long Island this summer, this visit will have to do all of us for the good times together we should be having in the next two months. Maybe we can fix it for a weekend in August in Amagansett.
Write when you can—but make it soon.
::::::::::::::::::::Love, 
:::::::::::::::::::::Bob