nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Celebrity Advice/Answer 8

Dear Duncan,
If anyone can sympathize with your plight then I guess it’s me. But don’t despair, life ain’t out to get get you. Remember, God’s on your side and He doesn’t want you to let this sort of shit happen to you. In my experience most cops are just fucking Nazis, man – especially the Jewish ones. Are the cops in Aberdeen all Jews too? The LAPD is like a fucking kibbutz or something.
Take my advice, pal. Buy a pick-up truck, get loaded and drive it home. If the cops try to stop you, drive right over the squad car. Better yet, get out and crucify one of those kike mother-fuckers, see how they like it. That'll teach them for persecuting Our Lord, the Yiddish bastards.
And, if your old lady gives you a hard time when you get home – give her a right hand straight on the jaw. Doesn’t it say in the Good Book that the only language dames understand is violence? I think it’s in Leviticus somewhere, most things are.
Mel G.
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Category:Celebrity Advice
Celebrity Advice/Answer 9

Dear Light-fingered in Liverpool,
First of all, hon, shop somewhere with more class than Boots, for God’s sake. When I go out “shopping” I like Kamofie & Company - that way I always come home with a nice necklace or some bracelets. One day I went to Faberge and came home with an enamelled egg!
And don’t worry about the cops whatever you do. What’s the worst they can do? Arrest you? So you wind up in jail – big deal! Honey, I tell you I’ve stayed in worse places and there are girls in there who can give you some new ideas for what to do with that banana and the hand-lotion. That’s why they call it the Pokey. Honestly, it’s a scream inside - why else would I keep breaking my bail terms?
Gotta go now, Dior is opening a new store down-town and I need to get an outsize purse to take with me when I go.
See ya,
Lindsay
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Category:Celebrity Advice
Celebrity Nipples

Most female celebrities have made public spectacles of themselves as they sunbathe, swim, or conduct other activities in the nude. Others, although they may seem chaste in their public behavior, have no qualms about baring it all for the big screen. So many actresses have displayed their nakedness that a popular commodity has become glimpses of parts of their breasts, their nipples, or the lower halves of their (crescent) moons (i. e,. buttocks). Called, in the business, "nip slips," "upskirts," "candid shots," and "oops" pictures, these photographs are frequently viewed the casual Internet surfer. Now, Carver Upp, an innovative plastic surgeon, has teamed up with Tee Tee Mulder, a sculptor, to offer for sale to the general public a line of celebrity nipples.
Based on thousands of feet of film showing bare celebrity breasts, on magazine and tabloid snapshots of accidental nipple displays, and on computer-simulated fantasies, the product, Celebrity Nipples, can make the nipples of any woman (or, for that matter, any man--"we are an equal opportunity supplier," Dr. Upp says) look like those of the celebrity--actress, athlete, singer, politician, or whoever--of her (or his) choice.
Particularly popular are Celebrity Nipples resembling those of Katie Holmes, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Pamela Anderson, Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Ashley Judd, Paris Hilton, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and (for some odd reason) Helen Hunt.
Available in Bronze Age Brown, Burnt Umber, Chocolate Mousse, Mellow Yellow, and Strawberry Pink, there is a Celebrity Nipple for everyone and, it is rumored, some celebrities have purchased a set or two of their own nipples, either out of vanity or as gag gifts. Gellar, for example, is said to wear a "perky pair" of her own nipples on her biceps or outer thigh. "You should see the looks I get," the relatively flat-chested actress said, beaming. "I wish Freddie would show the same level of interest in me as passersby do when they see my Celebrity Nipples on display. If he did, we might have a child by now."
Category:Boobage
Category:Nipples
Census

A census is a Government official whose job it is, once every ten years, to go around and paint black boxes over all male and female genitalia.
==History==
Censi (Censi being the plural of Census) were created during the Victorian Age. At the time, sex was a taboo subject in England, and people would reproduce by splitting down the middle, much in the same way as horses. As a result, the genitals were no longer needed and thus they would be obscured in order not to offend or corrupt the innocent children. Upon completion of this act, the Census would shout, "LolZoR, J00 jUzt G0t C3|\|5orEc|, B14tC|-|!!!!1111oneoneone". Upon hearing this, all would rejoice as the morals of an entire society were protected for another 10 years.
==The role of the Census today==
*Nowadays, the role of the Census is mainly ceremonial, and were it not for the fact that the Queen enjoys the feel of the soft horsehair paintbrush being stroked gently across her breasts and vagina, she would have outlawed them long ago.
*In British sex clubs, Censi are required to hold up a blue dot obscuring the action that is taking place on stage, owing to an outdated law which states that people may have sex as long as no one (not even the people participating in the reproductive act) can see the actual act of penetration. This is also why all British people must have the lights out when they are sleeping together.
*The Order of the Census is England's 212th highest rank of chivalry.
==The Census in Popular culture==
*In 2004, the infamous anti-semite Dan Brown published a book about the Order of the Census, wherein he claimed that Censi were actually the invention of the Jewish wealthy elite living in London, and that on Easter day they would kidnap little Christian boys and crucify them. The two-dimensional protagonist character, Dr. Langdon, has to rush around London, stopping the noisome misdeeds of the Censi before defusing a nuclear bomb, only to find out that the Order of the Census never really existed and it was all a fabrication of the Pope in order to provide His Holiness with a reason to declare a Holy Crusade on England to bring it back into the Bosom of the Church. Langdon manages to thwart this, and finishes by discovering that the Great Stone Face of Mars is, in fact, the resting place of the Ark of the Covenant.
*A little known book called the Bible claims that a Census is, in fact, a governmental method of counting the population. However, this book was written by famous humorist Oscar Wilde, and this preposterous claim is, in fact, a piece of satire condemning the burning of Savonarola by the Florentine Republic.
Category:Government
Category:Literature
Category:Statistics
Category:UN:SP
Center for Disease Control

The CDC, or the Center for Disease Control (pictured to the right) is a monolith located in Burlington, Vermont. The CDC was established by the United States Government in June, 1957 as a way to help control the spread of infectious diseases. Contrary to popular belief, the CDC is not a research center, but a monolith bestowed with mystical powers.
==In the Summer of '53==
The year was 1953, and the common cold and other nasty diseases were rampaging across the nation, causing headaches, stuffy sinuses, dizziness, nausea, and even runny noses. Even rich white men became sick, prompting Washington to take notice.
"Oh! Won't someone do something?!?" wailed a rich white man trying to stanch the flow of mucus from his nose with hundred-dollar bills.
Congress, itself the domain of rich white men and painfully aware of their suffering, formed a committee to look into the formation of a center for disease research. Millions of dollars and several dozen blowjobs later, Congress formed a committee to look into the committee looking into the formation of a center for disease research to find out exactly where all the money was going. 
No answers were found, and rich white men were still sneezing in the halls of power. The situation was dire.
Then, as if on cue, a little-known lobby, the Council of VooDoo, stepped forth and persuaded Congress to develop a state-of-the-art monolith that would then be infused with Great Power and placed in an easily accessible location to help ward off disease in the United States. 
After groping some interns, Congress decided to disband the committees, fund the monolith, and place the finished product in the center of the US: Vermont.
==The CDC is Built==
Federally contracted craftsmen working night and day in a factory in Decatur, Ohio, fashioned the CDC from granite, blue paint, and love. The finished product was put on a train, shipped to Nebraska, and kept there in storage for three years until 1957.
In June of 1957, a group of shamans, Catholic Priests, and select members of the Ministry of Magic blessed, charmed, hexed, annointed, consecrated, and kissed the CDC after it was delivered via pack mule to Burlington Vermont.
==The CDC Today==
For a paltry 130.5 million dollars a year, a sum that would not be better spent elsewhere, the CDC is maintained by a staff of three groundskeepers, two granite polishers, five shamans, and fourteen executive members of the Center for Disease Control Board. The CDC is accessible to be touched, rubbed, kissed, or licked after US citizens clear a three-month wait and present $50 USD, and forms in triplicate approved by their PPO, HMO, or other medical provider (Medicare and Medicaid not accepted). 
Category:Sexually transmitted disease
Category:Agencies of the United States government
Category:Health in the United States
Centrebus

Centrebus is a bus company operating in and around several British towns, taking passengers from point A to point B at barely walking pace. Established in 2001, it has quickly taken over all competition bus and coach companies in the central region of Brittan leaving little to no alternative for people who are too lazy to walk and too incompetent to drive.
In 2013, Centrebus unbelievably were announced in the top 200 list of companies in Leicestershire.
In typical unreliable transport company fashion, it's CEO is none other than a multi millionaire who loves nothing more than to annoy thousands upon thousands o commuters with grossly over sized fares, slow buses and gum all over the seats. 
== Reliability ==
Centrebus are the lowest of low companies running with buses.
Operating the worlds worst buses they operate a variety of utterly idiotic routes.
This involves using the MERCEDES VARIOS. The beginning of Armageddon.
Users of Centrebus describe their thought of traveling on the alleged new system:
*The new system sucks - If you want a major efficient system why don't you travel on the new feet you have.
*Not worth the bother. - The varios suck, I always sit near the driver who just decides its time to empty his load... ON THE WHEEL. Useless bothering.
The buses are very short lived with some only lasting up to and including 7 minutes. Most of the buses end up;
*On fire
*In the ditch
*Covered in milk
*In a scrapyard
*On Eddy's plate
Or as the above picture shows...
== Inconsistency ==
thumb|As shown here Optare are proud to test the OPTARE SOLOs on the F1 track with a top speed of... 17MPH!
Centrebus are known for having the world worst buses, taking advantage of all the buses that are either damaged/have been on fire/at the end of either life. It is standard practice to find that non of the buses in this fleet are consistent. Some are Purple, some are Brown, some have blue text, some have red, some have seats, some have suspension and as per normal, some have non of these.
NOTE THE DRIVER OF THE RIGHT BUS TAKING A DRAG BEFORE THE RACE
== Fleet List ==
A fleet list is shown below of all the buses that you should NOT travel on.
NULL VALUE FOUND
There are 4 types of Centrebus in the Hinckley fleet.
*Mereceds Varios
**The end.
*Optare Solos
**Null Value Found
*Dennis Darts
**Victorian Seats
*Optare Excels
**Sounds like a tractor pulling off
Category:Transport in the United Kingdom
Cerebral Islamsy

Cerebral Islamsy, also known as Allah Cerebral Akbar, and ParkIslam Disease, and Islam-induced brain disorder, and Islamic carcinoma (Latin name: Islamicus Brainwashing syndromus), or simply Islam is an umbrella term encompassing a group of progressive, non-contagious mental conditions that cause different degrees of mental disability. The disease, in especially serious cases, also affects the whole central nervous system. This is when the sick person puts himself into incontrollable state, dealing with Qu'ran and other objects of his obsession. Cerebral Islamsy usually results from taking some kind of brainwashing entity for a long time.
thumb|left|200px|The brain of a man affected by Allah Cerebral Akbar.
==Subtypes==
* Shia Cerebral Islamsy
* Sunni Cerebral Islamsy
==Signs and symptoms==
* Antisemitism
* Intolerance of caricatures of their obsession (see who Kurt Westergaard is)
* Inability to think logically
* Extreme aggressiveness towards those who expressed even the least doubt about truth of Islamic belief
* Jihad
* Ability to see evil where it does not exist
* Affected persons never say "I jerked off" or "I milked the lizard" about the fact that they masturbated, for it is impious to say so, in their view; instead, they stress their state - "I comforted the sufferer"
==Epidemiology==
The disease is transmitted from parent to children by means of teaching irrational thinking, rather than logical thinking, as well as through mullahs' activity. Cerebral Islamsy affects people throughout the Middle East, where the chief object of obsession of sick people is found, Kaaba. Though, there are numerous cases of sick people migration to healthy areas such as Europe.
thumb|200 px|right|Percentage of affected people by countries, 2009
==Treatment==
Left untreated for several years, the disease causes irreversible changes in cerebral cortex. Sufferers grow angry, impatient towards healthy people. Prognosis is inauspicious. There is no solid opinion among psychiatrist regarding the treatment. Possible variants include isolation from civilized society, shock therapy and brain-stimulating drugs. But, due to great prevalence of the disease and the lack of special medical centers, cure is dufficult. Modern science found that morbid religiosity is an epilepsy symptom, so it can be cured through operating on the brain.
In rare cases there is self-medication through reading Internet. In the terminal stage treatment is impossible due to sufferer's loss of ability to adequately perceive information.
There is aslo a hypothesis that Cerebral Islamsy is a disease of virus origin.
==List of famous sufferers==
Osama Bin Laden
==See also==
*Islam
*Allahakbarries
*Muhammad
*Allah
*Jihad!
*Al Qaeda Homepage
Category:Diseases 
Category:Psychology
Category: Really Angry People
Category:Religion
Category:islam
Cerium

Cerium (pronounced Sir, do you need a cup of tea? Ey... Uhm...), not to be confused with the Centre D'études et De Recherches Internationales... Um?The official website. Yes, this is real., or this electronic company I foundAnother one! It DOES have Cerium in the name, but who cares?, or even this educational company that I foundHere's the link, now scram., is the 58th element of the Periodic Table of Elements, with the atomic symbol of Ce. It is a rare earth metal located in the lanthanide series, mostly because it is useless. People often confuse Cerium with Caesium, due to their close proximity on the Periodic Table, their similar atomic symbols of Ce and Cs, although Caesium has more uses than Cerium. We do not talk about what happened to Curium.
Cerium is the second element of the lanthanide series, with Lanthanum being the element on the left, while Parodymium being the element on the right. It is the most common lanthanide (whatever that means), probably because it looks like every other lanthanide.
== History ==
Cerium was discovered in 1944 in Gabon by using a sample of Plut—NO, that's Curium. Sorry. Honestly, Caesium, Cerium, and Curium just blend together. Actually, why do you care, ? It's not like you're an active and enthusiastic Cerium enjoyer. Unless, you, yeah YOU, , created Curiu—I MEAN Cerium. In which, you are dead.
=== Etymology ===
The name Cerium came from the dwarf planet of Ceres, mostly because the discoverer of Cerium, Jöns Jakob Berzelius decided to name it after an almost-planet-but-didn't-make-the-cut-just-kidding-it's-so-tiny planet that was discovered a year before. Talk about Swedish originality!Ceres was discovered by an Italian, by the way.
== Physical Properties ==
Honestly, you could just read the articles of Parodymium, Neodymium, Pentium, Samarium, and Terbium to get your information about Cerium. It's metallic, what more do you want? That it's electronic? That it's stable? What else am I supposed to state? It's "softness"? It's "dissolution"? It's flav—wait, wait—yes, that might actually be interesting! Perfect!
=== Flavour ===
The flavour of Cerium is a soft boring grey metallic taste of nothingness. Trying to consume Cerium can cause a transformation inside of the human body, causing your skin to turn into Cerium. And als—wait, no, no, that would be Caesium.
=== Usage ===
Due to Cerium's placement being in the lanthanides, it is used mostly in LEDs, electronics, and lighting. As stated before, nobody gives a crap about Cerium! It is simply an element placed so that there can be fifteen lanthanide elements in the Periodic Table! There is only one thing interesting about Cerium, you can only use it on floodlights. Floodlights are lights for floods, not lights caused by a flood. It cannot be used for regular lights. Using it with lights can cause several mental and psychological breakdowns.
== Notes ==
Category:Lanthanides
Cgi-bin

The CGI-Bin is where Pixar and other computer animation studios put their failed concept ideas and other assorted 3D things. Sort of like wastebaskets, rubbish bins, trash cans, recycling receptacles, garbage compactors, data sinks, or even In-Sink Erators. However, The CGI-Bin is far more sinister than just a simple graphics disposal.
One thing you should know about The CGI Bin is that there is only one. The genius of The CGI-Bin comes in the fact that it is a huge distributed network of directories all dedicated to storing botched renderings of Buzz Lightyear and Shrek. You've seen the 'cgi-bin' directories (also referred to as 'dumps'). You may have even thought you knew how those directories work. I'm sorry to break it to you, my friend, but you don't. What you "know" is a lie.
== But how does it really work? ==
You may be wondering "Well, if this 'CGI Bin' works so well, then why do I see so much shitty 3D renderings when I'm browsing deviantART and other 'art' sites?" The answer is simple.
Everyone has seen that telltale "500 Internal Server Error" occasionally when browsing the internet. The majority of these errors happen from within 'cgi-bin' directories. You see, when Steve Jobs invented the CGI bin, he wasn't thinking clearly (not that he ever thinks clearly, but I digress). He accidentally built a limit into the amount of bad art that the dumps could contain. Through experimentation, it has been found that only 500 renderings may be stored in one dump.
Hence, with dumps filling up all over the place, and with less and less people using 'cgi-bin' directories, Bad Art has fewer places to go. Sometimes, it makes it out into the internet in its true form, See their reviews Hostmonster review causing widespread dislike of 3D modelling websites, art websites that distribute it, and 3D art in general. Even worse, some studios choose not to utilize The CGI Bin and instead just publish whatever they create. It is because of this lack of consideration for the internet and the world as a whole that we have movies like Madagascar.
== Discarded ideas that got into the bin ==
thumb|Not in 65 million years.
*In 1999, Pixar was considering a film involving futuristic cyborg dinosaurs duking it out on a terraformed Mars. Not surprisingly, it never got past the storyboard stage.
*DreamWorks studios was considering an animated film about dorky, stupid cats. But it never got past concept art.
== The Future of the CGI-Bin ==
However, there is good news. Because the public at large is getting a little tired of 3D animation and flashy effects, people aren't really all that excited about 3D movies anymore. This means that the studios aren't really getting paid all that much anymore. In addition to this, animation studios have recently stopped making Bad Art (with the exception of Madagascar), The CGI Bin is now able to manage its dumps slightly more effectively.
Bluehost review
Category: Internet
Chad Smith

thumb|right|Will Ferrell in his disguise as Chad Smith.
This article is about the alter ego of Will Ferrell. For the original Chad Smith, see Chad Smith/Classic.
Chad Smith is the alter-ego of Will Ferrell. When times are tough for Will, he just puts on a hat, grabs a pair of drumsticks, and he magically turns into Chad Smith.
==Early life==
See Will Ferrell.
==His Career==
Will Ferrell, at the time a struggling stand-up comedian, moved to California to pursue his dream of television, and had booked an audition for Saturday Night Live. Unfortunately, he got the wrong address and turned up to an audition for the funk rock band The Red Hot Chili Peppers instead. Ferrell decided to make the most out of the audition, and completely improvised his drum playing, which mainly consisted of him rubbing his testicles all over the drums. The rest of the Peppers were impressed by his performance, and let him into the band. He has been part of the band since, and has played drums and cowbell for all of the band's albums since then. 
==Alter Ego Tastes==
As far as individual tastes go, 'Chad Smiths are the following:
*In Music: Hellogoodbye; Peter, Paul, and Mary; The White Stripes; and all Disney music.
*In Transportation: 'Chad' rarely drives cars; usually getting around by paying homeless people to carry him around on their backs.
*In Countries: 'Chads favorite country is Canada. No one really knows why, but it could be because of their national healthcare and cheaper Rx drugs.
*In Religion: 'Chad' is a devout Scientologist. Ok, he's really an Episcopalian, but you believed me there for a second.
*In Clothing: 'Chad' hardly wears anything other than paper bags over his tighty-whities, but always wears high heeled shoes. It helps him fit in with the common people more.
*In Planets: 'Chads favorite planet is Pluto. Um...yeah...this is awkward...(No one's really broken the news to him yet. Please, I beg, you, don't. The fate of the planet Earth rests on your ability to keep this secret from him. Don't ask me how; just do it.)
*Egyptian Tassel Monkeys - No one exactly knows what category this falls into, but it is well known that whatever they are are one of 'Chads Individual Tastes.
==Headgear==
Ferrell as Chad Smith is never seen without a covering of some sort on his head, if he were to take it off, his disguise would be revealed.
==See Also==
*Will Ferrell (Main article)
*Red Hot Chili Peppers
category:American musicians
Category:Drummers
Category:Douches