nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Eat the Moon

Everything 'on earth'? Pfft, I got my eyes on the fucking Moon bro. Reword your question. Y'know I'd be up there gnawing on those moonrocks. That shit looks delicious. Get to the Moon and slam moonrock against my visor because I didn't realize that I still had my moonsuit on. Get into my moon-vessle, take out my knife and fork, start wolfing down the Moon. You already know that the tides are gonna be lower when I'm going fucking HAM on the Moon. Maybe make a Moon-soup. Tell all the NASA-guys that they don't need to pack any of that astronaut-food-muck because I'll have a whole-ass celestial object to chew on. I'm gonna need a doggie-bag when I leave cause I know I'm gonna be hungry for some Moon on the way back. I'll probably have problems sleeping because I'm thinking about that fucking sublime taste bro. Please give me another piece of Moon. I'll fucking die if you don't shoot me up there again. What, you don't think I'm eligible to go again? Bro, you're a fucking scientist bitch. I'll strap myself to the next rocket to the Moon, with or without your permission. I'll fucking melt in the heat of atmospheric friction, I don't give a shit. I need Moon between my jaws, next to my gums, in front of my uvula. Maybe just build my own rocket. You know what? Go stick a fucking donkey bitch up your ass bro. I'm gonna get to the Moon again. Shit tastes like the tears of god bro. They're gonna bury me with my last crumb of Moon. I'm gonna be sitting next to these wheelchair motherfuckers in the old people's home who've never even been close to the Moon. I'm just gonna be fucking babbling nonsense about that divine moment my tongue touched that first piece of Moon. I'm gonna die of fucking starvation bro. I'm gonna refuse the tainted food from this fucking bitch-made planet. Hasta la vista you shit-bitches.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:EVIL FOOD
Category:Shortpasta
Eating Doorknobs Is Normal

It was on a Monday afternoon. That is the day I realized that eating doorknobs is normal. I was sitting in my chair speaking on the phone when I looked at the doorknob. It was gold. It was a shade of gold that looked almost perfect. I felt a sudden urge to go and eat it. I have always had these urges whenever I saw something golden. For example, medival armors. I have informed my friend about this and he started laughing but that did not discourage me. I could only imagine the taste it had. At first, I thought of a vanilla taste but then I figured I had to find it out myself. I stood up and tried taking a big bite out of the doorknob but I could only have a slight taste before anyone noticed. It had a sweet taste, mostly chemicals and lemon. I ran back to my chair and to my surpise, nobody heard it. I told my friend how it felt to taste a doorknob but he never tried it and just rather laughed even harder. Ever since then, I have eaten about 70 doorknobs and 2 golden spoons. I am known as the guy who eats a lot of iron and metal. My actual name is Zolano and I do not eat that much iron and metal. I don't eat as much furniture as I used to when I was 16. I am 16 and a half now, I am a changed man. My neighbours do not call the cops on me as often and the furniture stores are okay with having me aroud. I live in Detroit and I have no girlfriend (sigma by choice). My job is infliencing people on Roblox and I own 3 GTA San Andreas roleplay servers. I have only convinced one of my friends so far to try doorknobs and his brain was hardly malfunctioning as it convinced him to not eat it and just throw it at me and run. Liking doorknobs is a new passion of mine. I only order 5 doorknobs a month and I am financionally stable. A lot of people tell me that I am stupid but I thinks that I am over average and a little below genius level. I am now developing a doorknob roleplay servers on my rig and it is going to be successful. I am follwing my dreams and it is working very well. Playing Fortnite all day is another hobby of mine that I know is going to get me super far in life. Although, Fortnite does not feature as much edible looking doorknobs as I thought it will but I am fine with that. My parents are super proud of me for everything that I have achieved in life. I am a very good student too, which I often use to flex and show a good example. Punching random things at the mall is another fine hobby of mine. It just costs a bit more than usual hobbies. Each time I feel like an object is menacing, I use all my powers to destroy them. This gets people looking at me with a funny face but the judging people will always be there. But it is fine as they will never be as cool as I will. I was Zolano writing this, thank you very much for reading. I hope I was able to inspire people to eat more doorknobs as they are very good for your health.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:The Title Is A Lie
Category:Wall of Text
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Shortpasta
Eating Piss, Drinking Shit

"Do you like to drink piss, or rather eat shit?"
A whole generation hung up in this debate.
Shiteaters make memes about pissdrinkers, constantly pinting out their superiority, while pissdrinkers glue themselves to roads to protest the constant shiteating.
Shiteaters claim drinking piss is harmful, while pissdrinkers point out how eating shit also ruins your health. Everyone pointing out the issue with eating shit is considered a pissdrinker, everyone who makes a statement about the unsustainable nature of eating shit is instantly considered a pissdrinker.
There are huge agendas, pushing for eating shit or drinking piss-its everywhere. Politics, academy, history, literature, art- it occurring, archetypal, transcendent.
Eating shit and drinking piss became the duality of "correct" thinking. Humanity was not able to leave the duality of shiteating and pissdrinking. They were simply consumed, emotionally, intellectually, spending every second of their life contemplating how to eat more shit or drink more piss.
One day, an ancient man climbed down the mountain. He had seen no man in a hundred years, and his confusion was boundless.
"Eating shit? Drinking piss? Are you guys crazy? Ever thought about doing neither?"
But people instantly threw shit and bottles of piss at him, until he dropped to the ground.
They chanted:
"Real pissdrinking was never tried" and "Eating shit is the best system we got, and it creates so much wealth"
The old man closed his eyes, and a bitter tear ran down his cheek.
This was humanity.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Potty Humor
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Eating Shit Copypasta

This was around 3 years ago. It was a dark and cold night, nobody was home (my parents were on holiday). I was in charge of taking care of the family dog (a 200 pound Pit bull called Cletus).
Anyways, I got to my usual stuff, gaming, scrolling through social media when all of a sudden, Cletus, (the family Pitbull) took one gigantic, heaping shit on my bedroom floor. I was in awe, shock, I had no idea Cletus was even remotely capable of excreting such a large amount of fecal matter.
He left the room shortly after as I still sat there on my gaming chair, frozen in shock. And then it hit me, the strong scent that was his shit. It was irresistible, I immediately stood up from my chair and walked towards that heaping pile of ooey-gooey goodness and leant on the floor. That's when I peaked, and the warmth of that shit hit me.
I edged closer to it, and that's when I did it, I took a large mouthful of it. A taste I will never forget. There was something about it, I was so hard, so horny, so turned on by its magnificent texture and taste. I started to play with it and squish it between my toesies as I slowly indulged in what I can only describe as fine dining. To this day, I still continue this fiasco and whenever the chance presents itself, I consume... the rats are my only friends. I know I need help... god speed people.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta
Ebony Veil Brides: Knives and Penises

One day i was listening to my favorite band ever, Ebony Veil Brides. They sung great hits like, Bohemian Raphsody, Pizza Power, and Forgot to turn my swag off. i decided to buy their new album "Wretched and Divine" which i hear is their bestest album ever. so i popped it into my PC and started listening to it.
So the first track was what was supposed to be Knives and Pens, but the name was "Knives and Penises." i thought it was just a typo. so i decided to keep listening. so Dahvie vanity apperantly guest sung in this song. which BOTDF is like the 2nd best band evar! <3. but anyway, so it was all normal up untill dahvies verse. where dahvie sung some weird shit like, "I want the devils cock," "I fucking love big ass dick in my small ass," and "Where are my hoes at." i shrugged it off thinking dahvie was just kidding around. BUT JUST THEN, dahvie said "Fan ta dig för jag har syndat och jag vill dö." and "Inte förlåta mig" i understood perfect swedish and i knew what he was saying was very dark and satanic. but i just shrugged it off because you know...i am smart.
So then dahvie said this "Poop." OMG THIS IS NOT RIGHT POOP IS SO CREEPY OMG HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME I LOVED DAHVIE I WANTED HIS...ahem. so right when he said that i took the CD out of the CD Player. and burned it. 
but before i could burn it a giant hand came out of my CD player and decided to take me into Purgatory where i had to play Flappy veil brides for the rest of my days.
and thats also where i wrote this story so yeah. i used to love Ebony veil brides but now i will never listen to them again!!!!1!
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Music
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
Eccentric Harold

I, Harold, am a peculiar old man who loves nothing more than standing on my roof, shirtless and barefoot, and yelling at my neighbors in old English.
But that's not the most ridiculous part - oh no, not by a long shot. You see, I also have a strange habit of relieving myself in my yard, right in plain view of all my neighbors.
At first, my neighbors were quite shocked and offended by my behavior. They tried to talk to me, to reason with me, to plead with me to stop. But I was having none of it. I just laughed and continued on with my odd ways.
One day, my neighbor, Mrs. Jones, had had enough. She marched over to my house and confronted me, demanding that I stop my bizarre behavior at once.
But I just smiled and said, "My dear Mrs. Jones, I do apologize if my actions have offended thee. But thou must understand, I am simply expressing my freedom and joy in the most ancient and honorable way possible - by standing on my roof and peeing in my yard, whilst shouting at the top of my lungs in old English."
Mrs. Jones was speechless. She didn't know what to say, so she just turned on her heel and marched back to her house, muttering under her breath.
But despite Mrs. Jones's outrage, I continue to stand on my roof, shirtless and peeing, and yelling at my neighbors in old English. And to this day, I remain the most eccentric and ridiculous old man in the neighborhood.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta
Ed, Edd n Eddy: Gritty Reboot

The kids all grown up in their 20s, everyone has left the cul-de-sac. Double Dee is a chemist, Eddy is a used car salesman, and Ed is an absolute junkie. eddy ends up getting fired and is desperately seeking money. He comes across Ed in an alley, smoking crystal meth. He tells Eddy that he is poor, but Eddy gets an idea, he sees the potential of money that they can earn. He goes to Double Dee to help produce the meth, but He says no. A couple days later, Double D finds out he has cancer. He agrees to help his friends in order to pay for his treatment. We see Double D transform from a nice, nerdy fellow into the King of the Cul-de-Sac. Breaking Ed.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:SMOKE WEED ERRYDAY
Category:Shortpasta
Ed, Edd n Eddy - Kevin.avi

Hello. I am a big fan of Cartoon Network. A few weeks ago, I came across a lost episode of Ed, Edd n Eddy.. It came in my files on my laptop. I then clicked on it and I saw a video called "Kevin.avi". "Odd" I thought.
I then clicked on the video. It started out with the intro but it was distorted and low quality. However during the intro, I saw a flash of something. I rewound frame by frame and saw something very horrifying. It was a picture of Kevin eating a human hand. I was grossed out and almost vomited. I then watched the rest.
It started with Ed and his buddies walking down the sidewalk. Then Kevin came and killed Ed, Edd and Eddy. He then finds his next target, Lee Kanker. He then kills Lee and then killed all the characters.
The screen went black for 9 seconds and then a loud jumpscare of Kevin with Hyper realistic eyes, and blood coming out of his mouth. Then the screen cuts to Kevin in a black room. He then stabs himself in the heart with a knife. The episode ends with black german text on a dark red background when translated saying: "Let's let satan free."
I then looked up the episode but no trace of it. I then deleted the episode off of the file and never seen it again. Don't watch Kevin.avi or else you will encounter scary things.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:File Extensions
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Collab
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Shortpasta
Ed, Edd n Eddy Lost Episode

I was an intern at Cartoon Network, and I was working on Ed, Edd n Eddy. One day, Danny Antonucci left the door of his office open, and COINCIDENTALLY I entered it. There was CD on his desk, and it said "EEnE Lost episode". Being the Mr. Smart Guy I was, I picked it up and took it home. I put it in my laptop, and I didn't regret it.
There was Notepad file 'Warning.txt' and it said: "This episode has been pulled off the air due to blood, gore and violence in the episode, it aired in some countries, WATCH IT ON YOUR OWN RISK!" Yeah right, I've seen that cliché many times, and nothing bad could happen at all!
I clicked on a file titled 'EEnE.avi'. The intro wasn't normal, theme song was playing in reverse, the intro was red, and it was bloody red in the background. So if it happens, you don't have to be afraid of it!
It starts with Eds after the failed scam, but for some reason, Eddy blamed Edd and Ed both. Eddy stared on a screen for 30 seconds, blinked, revealing bloodshot eyes saying "YOU WILL DIE!" and he took out the knife and killed both Ed and Edd and said "GO TO HELL!", while they were screaming. Blood was spilling and organs were dropping LIKE MY JAW WHEN THAT HAPPENED!
Screen blacked out for 1 minute and Eddy was shown whole red with those eyes. He kills Jimmy, Sarah, Nazz, Jonny, Kevin, Rolf and Kankers while distorted piano plays in reverse and you could hear that BEN laugh in the background. DON'T BE SCARED! BEN does it all the times!
Eddy turns one more time to the screen and says "I WILL FIND YOU AND KILL YOU, TOM!" Yes I'm the Tom guy from Sonic.exe, so what?! The credits were silent and handwritten. I deleted that episode from my computer and broke the disc, IF YOU FIND THAT EPISODE, DO NOT WATCH IT!!!
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Satire
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
Ed, Edd n heartbreak

"Keep pushing, Plank!"
A 30 year old Plank sat in a hospital bed giving birth, clenching the hand of his 34 year old lover, Jonny 2x4. He had gotten pregnant as a piece of wood because reasons.
About 72 hours later, Plank had given birth to a baby boy named Sheldon. Upon seeing Sheldon, Jonny realized that the baby didn't resemble he or Plank, but their old childhood friend, Edd (or as they usually called him, "Double D").
Once Sheldon, Plank and Jonny left the hospital, Jonny got into a big fight with Plank.
"What the fuck is wrong with you, Plank?!" Jonny shouted, bursting into tears. "I thought I was Sheldon's other father!"
"I'm sorry, Jonny!" Plank cried. "I just couldn't resist Double D's thiccness!"
Jonny slapped Plank. "I thought we had something special!"
Plank just stood there, shaking and crying. 
"Answer me, bitch!"
"Double D's a lot nicer than you are..." Plank said, trembling.
"You take that back!" Jonny shouted.
"Double D doesn't yell all the time," Plank said, now furious. "Besides, he's got a great body, unlike you!"
Jonny slapped Plank again. "GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE."
"But-"
"GET OUT. NOW."
Plank took Sheldon in his arms and ran out of the house, sobbing uncontrollably. 
"Dear God, what have I done?" Jonny said, realizing what he had done.
Meanwhile, upon realizing that he was Plank's baby daddy, Double D hung himself. Plank did the same, and left Sheldon alone in the woods to be raised by coyotes. Jonny then spiraled into a deep depression and never felt happiness again.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Ed Edd 'n Eddy Bonus Episode

I am a Cartoon Network fan since 16 years ago. 
When I was in a mall I saw a Video store. Because my curiousity I entered the store to see if I will find a rare dvd or one that I dont have in my collection. I searched and searched and searched....... until I saw something........
It was a Cartoon Network dvd. But the dvd said "Classics" and it was very good hand-drawn
I picked the dvd and go to the cashier. 
I bought the dvd whit 20$. Yeah, I know that this is a pretty rare thing but this is a lot. i thought.
When I arrived home, I saw that the dvd also said "+Bonus Ed, Edd 'n Eddy episode".
I poped the disc into my dvd and cd player and I hit play, but it wouldn't work. So I tried a lot of times and..... Nothing....
I wanted to go back in the mall and return the dvd, but in the moment when I wanted to eject the dvd, A menu selection screen appeared.
I sat down and clicked on the first show.
All was normal, I watched a lot of classics until the screen froze for 5 minutes and then I saw again the selection screen that had 2 options: 1. Play the bonus episode and 2. Eject dvd.
I was curious so I clicked on "Play the bonus episode"
The episode started whit the normal intro but Ed was missing. The episode skipped from the title to the actual episode.
After that, I noticed that the episode will last just 1 minute wich was odd.
The episode starts with Ed (My favorite character from the show) saying something in a distorted voice while on his tv were shown some creepy images like Edd crying whit bloodshot eyes or Eddy holding his own eyeballs. After 30 seconds Ed's voice sounded clear and i heard what he said.
He was saying: "The curse will end when they will die. Killed by......" 
Then Eddy came in Ed's room whit a big grin on his face whit a knife in his face. Eddy's eyes were missing. After that Eddy kills Ed whit the knife and the video ends whit a last message: "EMOC LLIW EH"
The next morning I get in my car to return the dvd. When I got there the cashier said "We're closing forever so you can't return the dvd!"
When I arrived home I written on the case and dvd "Watch at your own risk".
I know that I can destroy it but I like to collect dvd.
Every night after that, I see the images and the scene when Eddy killed Ed in my dreams.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Pointless Violence
Ed Edd and Eddy lost episode

Hello my name is Jeremy. Today I will talk about strange episode Of Ed Edd and Eddy I was once saw. So I was watching Tv on the cartoon network then Episode started normally with normal intro. The title screen showed up Ed in the head. I didn't remember this episode but I don't every episode. Then number 666 showed up for 66,6 seconds timed with stopwatch. Then It cut out to Eddy opening package inside of it was gun. Then it cut out to Eddy saying to Ed and double D today we are going get money and jawbreakers his eyes were hyper realistic and red and black. How are going to do this said double D I am going to rob someone That is not good idea said double D while they were talking Ed was levitating in the air z. Then it cut our to static for 44 seconds timed with stopwatch. Then it cut out to Eddy saying with demonic voice to Kevin give your money or I will shoot you while pointing his gun at him Kevin replied No dork This gun is probaly fake. Then Eddy shoots Kevin in the head he dies and hyper realistic blood is splattered everywhere I pissed myself. Then double D says do eddy How could you I am going to call police.
But eddy shoots double D in head and hyper realistic blood was everywhere even on me. Then he takes Kevin's money and buys jawbreakers He eats them. Then pictures of dead children are shown I got heart attack but I survive. Then it cuts outs to Eddy saying to Jimmy give me your money or I will shoot you. Then he shoots Jimmy in the head and he dies then he dies and Eddy steals his money buys jawbreakers for that. Then he plays football with Ed using head of Jimmy instead of Ball. I puked.
Then it cuts out of to the dead bodies of rest kids in this show dead except of Jonny, Rolf and Ed and Eddy hyper realistic blood and organs were everywhere. Then it cuts out To Eddy counting money and buying jawbreakers for that then he says Why didn't I do that earlier with demonic hyper realistic voice. Then I was who made is this? Why is this children show?. Then it cuts out to the Rolf killing animals With knife but then Eddy appears and says I give your money Or I will shot you. Rolf gives Eddy his money then Rolf goes back to killing animals. Then it cut out To Eddy trying to rob Johnny while he Ed eats plank.
Then Eddy kills Jonny and takes his money then Eddy laugh for 44,4 seconds. Then Ed eats kids souls like buttered toast. Then Eddy buys jaw breakers and says You are next. I am going to commit suicide. The plot twist of this story is that you made this episode but you forgot that happened. But the scariest thing about is that I wasted my time on writing this..
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:YOU'RE NEXT
Category:English Class Failure