nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Where Crime was Invented

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Crime, not to be confused with crime (note the first 'c' in lower case) is an ancient invention which dates back to 102BC, and is widely considered to be one the most confusing things ever concocted, grown or developed. 
There is absolutely no debate whatsoever (except for the controversy noted in brief later on in the article) as to where Crime was invented, similar to the certainty that crime is the invention of McGruff, the crime-fighting dog: Crime has its origins in Great Eccleston of Lancashire, United Kingdom.
==Why Drive When You Can Crime?==
Crime is of little use to most, and great use to many. Crime has been used variously as a glue, a thickening agent in soups and stews, a secret ingredient in various cocktails, a sandwich spread, a cure for malaria, an aphrodisiac, a solution for x where y is an integer, the capital of Lesotho, and a cheap and effective means of child care.
For a brief time (700 years) after its invention, Crime was stolen and presumed lost until it was discovered growing freely in Anatolia by the forces of Alexander the Great, who used it to torment the local wildlife and give their bread a little extra "zing."
Burnt Crime was used extensively as a feminine deoderant product in India for most of the Mughal Dynasty.
Currently, America is the largest global exporter of Crime, while the UK ranks 56th in overall Crime production, prompting many residents of Great Britain to skip directly to the end of the fourth Harry Potter book. Will these readers line up to see the world premiere of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire? 
Hollywood insiders say, "Could you please hold? I'm on the line with Jake Gyllenhaal," Margaret Thatcher countered this reaction, spluttering, "Witches and wizards are tools of the resurgent forces of pagan Earth worship and should be keel-hauled by a ship-of-the-line! Arrgh!"
===Rival Claim===
A rival claim for the invention of Crime was make by Arthur C. Clarke in his book Crime - and Why I Invented It. In the book he claims to have invented Crime a full three years before the date of Great Eccleston, whilst on holiday in Cleethorpes. He also claims to be an author, and not a pedophile.
==The Sacred Home of Crime==
Great Eccleston of Lancashire, United Kingdom is the reputed home of Crime, and a shrine made out of empty pickle jars full of bronzed potatoes dedicates the invention of Crime by Celtic chieftan Gwenog the Bold in 103BC. The shrine is visited every year by descendents of Roman soldiers who took part in the Roman occupation of the British Isles, or anyone who enjoys the bitter fruits of Crime. Which is pretty much everyone, if you really think about it.
===Did You Know?===
In 1987, the Lord Mayor of Great Eccleston attempted to disown his town's association with Crime, but was censured by the Society for the Preservation of Crime and forced to leave his office in Disgrace for a new, less good office in Shame.
====No, I Didn't====
Well, you should have paid closer attention. Pencils down!
==See Also==
* wolf
* punishment
* Uncyclopedia:Deletion Policy
Where Is The Lid?

In the dim and distant past, a definite vacuum of satire existed on British television. Angry but hilarious commentary was, as yet, unknown; the terrifying erection-killer Margaret Thatcher's icy grip sucked the comedy out of any brave attempts that struggled onto the nation's screens. In this time of difficulty, the nation's pent-up frustration needed to find some way to escape.
Hugh Laurie was just the man for the job.
==What was the problem?==
Doubtless, you have experienced the sensation yourself. Picture the scene: a beautiful Sunday morning, the wind caressing the trees, the sun beaming down on a peaceful village as pensioners amble to church. A perfect day. A day on which nothing can go wrong; a day during which the earth is truly at peace with itself.
And then, calamity strikes.
The silence is broken by a scream. A cataclysmic event has taken place, your only clue to its nature being the plaintive wail emanating from a nearby building. You strain your ears to listen, hoping against hope that nothing too dreadful has occurred. Does anyone know? you hear. Does anyone know? Where is the lid?
==Which lid would this be?==
Many speculative theories have been suggested regarding the nature of this lid. The most widely accepted, proposed by one S. Fry, is the idea that the lid is simply a lid: an item designed to keep the contents of a jar of jam restrained within the container. The concept, for him, lies more in the human interaction with the lid; the way Laurie's long struggle with mental illness had left him incapable of accepting the loss of even the most basic of objects.
However, such is the genius of the sketch that alternative levels of analysis are possible.
==Romantic subtext==
Throughout their long partnership, Fry, a dedicated homosexual, and Laurie, a purported heterosexual, have pursued a friendship which many have described as 'suspicious', 'inappropriate', 'alternative', or 'just downright suggestive'. Proponents of this theory suggest that the lid is actually symbolic of Laurie's virginity. The analogy suggests that Fry is in some way responsible for its loss, as he appears to be aware of its whereabouts while Laurie is not.
The mention of a jam jar, however, and Fry beating Laurie to death later on in the sketch, lends a disturbing air to this interpretation.
==Where was the lid?==
To his eternal chagrin, and despite Fry's frequent mentions of its whereabouts, Laurie never manages to locate the lid. Perhaps this is a lesson for us all: we can spend our whole lives searching for things that are obvious to others, and yet never find satisfaction. Perhaps this is an indicator that we should listen to those in the background before we follow our own instincts. Perhaps this simply refers to Laurie's inability to recover his virginity from the man that has so obviously taken it. 
Only time will tell.
Category:British television programmes
Whiskers

Whiskers are often observed on mammals. The long hairs protruding from the front regions of the face have been examined and studied for a long time. Scottish makers of intoxicating beverages have named a traditional product after them and aboriginal tribes in the southeast andes have used cat whiskers as bridal decoration and to clean the gaps between their front teeth for centuries until cats went extinct in the region.
==Traditional View==
The functions of whiskers have not been fully understood for a long time. The traditional view would describe the function of whiskers as something like "helping orientation in the dark", or as an "tactile aid". Something like: "If the whiskers would fit into a gap then the whole cat fits into it without getting stuck".
==The Breakthrough==
Recent studies from a lesser reputated university in the rural area of Estonia brought an incredible breakthrough and completly new insight into the real functions:
* The average length of cat-whiskers is exactly lamba 2 of the wavelength of high frequency signals around 2.4 GHz
* The capability of the cat to move its whiskers at will allows them to produce an high-directional antenna array for signals in the range of 2.4 GHz with an antenna gain of more than 32dB
* Mice emit 2.4 GHz signals when mating (which means they are distracted during this process, which in turn makes them easy prey (Maybe this finding is caused by proliferation of bluetooth headsets in Estonia during the mating season of mice, further investigations have to eliminate this possible source for errors)
This is another example how the marvels of evolution produce mindboggingly useful features
==Problems in Modern Households==
Most cats will be totally confused in modern households through the extensive use of the 2.4GHz radio band. 
Many devices such as microwave ovens, bluetooth devices or wireless computers emit high frequency signals, which will leave the poor cat completely disoriented, perplexed and in a state of mind to slip into the next wormhole.
Cats are often observed to attack wireless computer equipment, microwave ovens and alike. This new fact will now make you understand this formerly mysterious behaviour.
Such confused cats are often abused by ruthless kitten huffers
== See Also ==
* Kitten
* Cat
* Kitten Huffing
Category:Anatomy
Category:Kittens
Category:Mammals
White (disambiguation)

White is a colour that's composed by the lack of colour.
There are a number of things that are white, including:
* The White House (U.S.)
* White people
* White trash
* White van
* White flags
* White horses
* White whales
* White Lion
* The White Album
* The White Stripes
* White bands
* Wiggers
* Ivory
There are also a number of people that are white, including:
* Barry White
* Jeordie White
* Shaun White
* Snow White
* Walter White
* Michael Jackson
es:Blanco (desambiguación)
it:Bianco
no:Hvit
pt:Branco
White Slave

The White Slave is a type of slave originating from the Americas, brought to Africa on slave ships at around the same time the White crackers were doing so. Africans utilized White Slaves to cultivate crops and do extensive manual labor on African plantations, but they screwed up and ended up destroying the land, creating deserts. White slaves were also influential in growing HIV, an essential crop at that era (though overused and lethal nowadays). White slavery continued in Africa until some white dude named Martin Luther King Johnson Smith advocated wigger's civil rights. The africans popped a cap in his ass but the white people became free. All the free white slaves went down to South Africa though for whatever reason.
==White Slaves and Russia==
White slaves are the numbert two import into Russia next to fire and monkey melanin. Only 12% of the slaves brought into Russia work in farms and factories,the other 32% are used for someone harsh labor, and 66% are used as sex slaves in many different provinces. this is substantial considering the fact that mostly 70% of the slaves are young boys and young girls. To Russian society, white slaves are normal occurrences for everyday living and because of the extreme cold temperatures. Most slaves are given a life expectancy of three months to six years. The average Russian family will go through four to nine slaves a year. Krukov Institute of Russian conomics
Note the paragraph above this one im pertaining to Russian Slavery.Most people cant handle the fact that whites were slaves before the blacks.kills your pride doesnt it?well there were slaves back in the bible days when jesus walked the earth(or earf how yo say it),but i guess your going to try and take that away from them to,but wait.they have been dead over a 1000 years.So you cant.Anyways it makes me sick to see that its ok for blacks to hate whites,call them cracka or crackers if you want to speak proper english.In which most of you dont.Then go on ahead.Your day is coming and when it does. your racist butt will get left handed into hell.Then you wont bitch about slvaery anymore.You will be down there with some of them that didnt repent for there sins and ask jesus into there hearts,but until then.when i strap a chain around your neck and beat you with a stick while your picking cotton.Shut the heck up!!!!!
==White Slaves and Africa==
See American African slaves
Who is the racist idoit that wrote this dribble?
==White Slaves and the Black Market==
White Slaves on the black market vary in price depending on age, sex, 
and if they had sex.
 V = Virgin In American money only
 Age | Male V | Female V | Male | Female |
 1-5 | 35$ | 40$ | 15$ | 20$ |
 6-10 | 80$ | 110$ | 63$ | 82$ | 
 11-16 | 245$ | 376$ | 178$ | 215$ |
 17-21 | 276$ | 404$ | 214$ | 278$ |
 22-34 | 230$ | 240$ | 175$ | 180$ |
 34-death| 99$ | 120$ | 50$ | 55$ |
== See also ==
*Sex
*Whitism
*The Color Problem
Category:Activism
Category:History
Category:Culture
Category:Racist articles
Category:Slavery
White metal

frame|right|Tom Selleck, a big fan of White Metal.
The white metals are any of several concoctions of metal, pious hatred and milk solids. The melting point of hatred is high enough to keep piousness at room temperature, yet low enough to allow white metal to get on your nerves.
==History==
White Metal predates Black Metal by many years. The first recording took place in Graceland’s basement studio in 1976. During one of Elvis Presley’s fictional drug binges (he was in Cuba at the time secretly working undercover for the CIA) Scotty Walker, a guitarist of some repute, began to play faster than normal and babble incoherently. What was initially thought to be a demonic possession turned out to be a godly manifestation of biblical proportions complete with speaking in tongues. The tapes of this event were locked away until Elvis’s eventual death from asthma in 1984. A representative from the estates of both Presley and Walker stated in early 1985 that the recording were “scary as all hell, only not, you know, hellish. Besides, Scotty was batshit crazy so you never knew what was gonna happen when that cat started to play! Elvis heard the tapes and he was scared, man, real scared. It stirred something in him, a real biblical, brimfire and gallstones kind of scared. He knew he needed to get out of music, which was when he faked his own de…”
==Lyrical Themes==
In contrast to the usual dark, or Black Metal, white metal is about loving the Big G, and giving full props to his main homeboy J to the hizouse. This has led to the popular belief that white metal does not contain hatred. However, since it is in the form of homophobia and racism rather than satan worship derived from sociopathic tendencies (an ingredient in all black metal), the hatred in white metal is not actually hatred as defined by the industry standard for metal (Fenriz).
==Musical Style==
It sounds like Black Metal only… er… hang on… no, that’s about it.
==Notable Bands==
There are no notable bands.
Category:Metal
Category:Music genres
Whitespace (programming language)

== General Gist of It ==
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== History of Whitespace ==
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== Whitespace and How You Use it on a Daily Basis ==
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Category:Nothing at all
Category:Programming languages
Category:Technobabble
Category:Pages that look like the things they're about
Whitewater kayaker

One form of life lower than Hippies. Known to habitate nearly anywhere on the planet, a Whitewater Kayaker can typically be found hanging around trash dumpsters with their pit bull, competeing for the Darwin Award and begging for change in front of local Starbucks stores all whilst plotting the most efficient way to convert the American society to socialism. While liberal, multicultural, racially acceptable and democratic on the surface a recent FOX News poll has found that over 79% of all Whitewater Kayakers are rigid, conservative cracker-ass-white republicans. Typically found in the Southeastern United States and the filthiest parts of Europe Whitewater Kayakers have recently been on the move throughout the world much like the dreaded avian flu, your mom and the Dixie Chicks.
== What in the name of Slim Pickens is a Whitewater Kayaker ==
=== "Hey!!! What's that smell?" (aka "Who farted?") ===
Simple Stupid. It's a Whitewater Kayaker.
A Whitewater Kayakers biggest fear? Soap
=== Are Whitewater Kayakers "really" athletes? ===
The Answer. No.
== Top 10 things to give a Whitewater Paddler to make him STFU ==
1. 1 Box of Moon Pie
2. Mork from Ork Suspenders
33. MORE F-ing! Cowbell
41. Atomic wedgie
57. Farmyard pornography (may substitute Wild Kingdom)
69. "yeah!", "That's it baby!" 
7.0 Hong Kong Phooey Lunchbox
ate. The frozen head of Gilbert Gottfried
nein. Christian rock and Ku Klux Klan Reggae 8-track tapes
little piggies. Waffle House gift card
== Racist History ==
Ever heard of Blackwater Kayakers? I didn't think so! That's just another fine example of whitey keepin' you all down. A lawsuit is expected to be filed in Federal Kangaroo Court in 2007 by the ACLU and NAACP cowritten by Jimmy Swaggart and the Fonz.
== Simple "keywords" to piss off (aka "kneejerk") a Whitewater Kayaker ==
Two words. Air America Two More? Global Warming. How about these bitches? Al Gore, Nancy Pelosi, Inside Joke, Kofi Annan, L. Ron Hubbard, Hillary Clinton, Jesus Christ, God, Bible, Bill Clinton, George Bush,
Category:Sports
Whittier, Alaska

W Shittier, nicknamed “A Reddit Armchair Urban Planner’s Wet Dream” (Apparently, that’s more than just a joke.) or “Pripiyat of the Great North”, is a town in Alaska that you’ve never heard of, period. But that’s something rather unremarkable for any human settlement in Alaska. But what IS remarkable about Whittier? Every other fucking thing in this town, for God’s sake.
== History ==
Whittier started off back in the day as a World War II army base, and it really shows. Like, REALLY. So, they built a big, ugly apartment block to house a shit ton of soldiers. And then they let that deteriorate because then they built another one. And, uhhh… Whittier hasn’t changed all that much to this day.
== Constant un-tropical monsoon season ==
Whittier is so rainy that it makes Ketchikan look like a Fucking desert. Yes, Fucking with a capital F, in bold text. I’m not joking, bro. This place very may well be the location of God’s cum sock, that’s how rainy it is. Here is a scientifically proven theorem to calculate just how rainy it is in Whittier:
Step 1: Start with the annual rain in Seattle.
Step 2: Multiply that by the weekly rain in Portland.
Step 3: Add the monthly rain in Vancouver (the trashy BC one, not the lovable Washington one), squared.
Step 4: Add the fortnightly amount of rain in Juneau or two for good measure.
You now have the amount of rain that falls in a single day in Whittier, divided by three.
== The Towers ==
No, not those towers!
The vast majority of Whittier residents live in an ugly-ass building that is called the “towers” despite being a single building. A fucking fat-ass commie block, that is. And if that wasn’t ugly and post-apocalyptic enough, there is another abandoned apartment building right next to the tower(s), which has been in a state of deterioration for only-God-knows-how-long.
This level of compactness is essentially Vancouveritis taken to the extreme. You can sprint from one end of Whittier to the other in clunky hiking boots (and I know because I’ve done it.)
== The Tunnel ==
You enter Whittier via a tunnel that goes right through a fucking MOUNTAIN. I mean, why not go… around it? But as Alaskans do, they just wanted to set records for being the biggest… that’s why the dam state exists, right? Everything’s bigger in Alaska (except for the towns,) that’s how it was always meant to be.
So this tunnel that the Alaskans painfully dynamited through a mountain is the longest fucking highway tunnel in the entire USA. But nobody fucking cares. Go back to Girdwood, or big old un-Alaskan Anchorage. Hell, you could camp out in the middle of the Chugach forest for all I care.
And oh yeah, the tunnel. It’s… just kinda there. It’s big. That’s… kinda it.
Ok, everyone, can we stop talking now? There are much better places to visit in Alaska than Whittier, and you are wasting your precious time by reading a stupid uncyclopedia article written by a fucking retard. Get a life, you’re literally in Alaska, land of getting a life itself.
== See also ==
* Ojai
Category:Alaska
Category:Cities in the United States
Who

This is a decongestant page for Uncyclopedia. The META-Fairies are confused about what you mean - were you looking for:
*The person on first
*The pseudo anagram for you
*The Who, a term applied to any indie rock band you can't think of.
*Doctor Who
*The World Health Organisation
** The Wuhan Health Organisation
** The Windows Health Organisation 
*Who, the mis-spelling of dyslexia.
*who is a genuine word, as spoken by the spelling bee.
*WHO is also a TV station. Because everything is. Always.
*Is gay.
*Is on first.
==Other meanings==
===A Joke===
The word who also appeared in episode 2 of I Love Lucy. In line with the oppressive environmental policies of then President Al Gore, it was recycled after the episode.
Ricky: Knock knock!
Lucy: Who's there?
Ricky: Doctor
Lucy: Oh, er come in then.
==See also==
If you like who, why not try these other words patented by Oscar Wilde?
*What
*Why
*When
*Witch and Which
*Wherefore
*Whooee
Category:Anonymous Category:Words
nl:Wie
zh:谁
zh-tw:誰
Who Do You Think

Who do you think (wdyt-wdyt) born in the the century you think. He was born between Infinity B.C. and 2101 A.D. Who do you think did this.
What do you think he did? You should know. Seriously, I am not gonna repeat it. You should know by now who the hell I'm talking about.
He was born... Where do you think he was born. Who do you think were his parents. You know who they were right? Come on, who do yo think.
What do you think he did? What do you think? Why do you think so?
What do you mean who am I talking about? Who do you think. Think about it.
== What Do You Think Happened First ==
He was talking shit about you, you know when. Who was? Who do you think.
Who do you think told me? Think. Who would tell me? Who do you think.
Who do you think and You know who.
You know who you think did. Who? Who do you think.
== Who? ==
Who? Who?! Do You Think? Do you even think?
Who do you even think who do you think is?! Who do you think.
Who. Who. Who. What animal do you think sounds like this. Think about it you retard.
I wouldn't call you a retard. Someone told me to. Who do you think?
== Sex ==
== American Idle ==
Who do you think is the new American Idol? It is between you know who and whoever you think. Who do you think is gonna win though.
Maybe if it wasn't for that judge. You know the one. Who do you think?
== Filmography ==
{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Year !! Title !! Role !! Notes
|-
|| When do you think? || What do you think || Who do you think || What do you think
|-
|| When do you think? || What do you think || Who do you think || What do you think
|-
|| When do you think? || What do you think || Who do you think || What do you think
|-
|| When do you think? || What do you think || Who do you think || What do you think
|-
|| When do you think? || What do you think || Who do you think || No, no, really. What the hell do you think?
Category:Anonymous