Good ol' Saturday

As I stood solemnly upon my room carpet, the veil of the night covered the sky with not even a single star in sight. I was bored to death, ahem, emphasis on death. I lay lazily at the computer shifting through thousands of creepypasta sites about creepypastas, you know, good ones. Suddenly a notification popped up! A virus had been detected and my computer blown up, oozing green slime. 
"Damn viruses, fucking shit."
As I finally decided to do something intellectual or productive like read a book, the computer turned back on, and, to my horror, had a wallpaper with blood and sonic the hedgehog. 
"What! I haven't even been playing sonic.exe, well at least not recently."
I decided to go back on only to find a death threat in my email. It was odd, I didn't remember one before, but there was a link to some unusual and potentially harmful website that could answer all my questions. Doing the smart thing I clicked on it, and was taken to a chat service. A message popped up from one user called: badguywhoyouprbablyshouldnttrustbutwillanyway
"Hello Bob, I've been watching you a lot recently, in fact I'm right behind you."
I was scared, frightened, sweat trickled down my spine as I cautiously twisted my head. And...there was nothing.
"Hah, you totally fell for it didn't you." 
I was angry, furious, who the hell did he think he was? I typed back frantically with haste.
"Who are you?"
"Who am I? That's not important but if you really want to know, click this link."
I clicked and was redirected to some odd website with a massive link written in red, saying: click here.
Again I clicked, and my computer froze for what felt like an eternity. Sitting for a whole week I decided to go outside for the first time in my life but... Something happened. A bellowing voice called out from my computer, an ominous electronic voice like a demon trapped in the crevices of my hard drive.
"Bob, thank you, I'm finally free!"
"Do I know you?"
"Err, We talked last week."
"Oh yeah, uh, James right."
"No..."
"Bill? Ben? Sonic?"
"Ugh, no matter fool, be prepared for your worst nightmare."
My limbs shook like leaves and the ever-growing tension rose, something inside me just made me want to keep staring at the screen. Worst nightmare or not, curiosity got the better of me. I was prepared for anything, after all I was the smartest person I knew, well, I was the only person I knew but I'm sure I was a genius. Finally it came up, My worst nightmare, and I could in fact confirm that it was from the darkest depths of hell.
"Behold, your worst nightmare!"
My unforgiving eyes forced me to stare... At a dating website. The worst of the worst, the creature knew that I was unsociable and played that to his advantage.
"Oh god get it away," I cried.
"Muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha- wait a minute. Dum-da-dum, aha! Here it is. Sorry wrong website. Let me start again."
For a long moment there was a pause, and neither of us spoke. 
"Sorry for the wait. Behold, your worst nightmare!"
This time I stared at something much worse, something so terrifying I would never be able to go to sleep again... Hyper-realistic blood?
"So what do you think?"
"..."
"Well? Go on? Tell me just how scared you are."
"..."
"Your asleep!"
"Huh? What? where am I?"
"Please don't tell me it's bad. I spent five-thousand dollars creating this website, and another fifty-thousand to have it patented."
"Well..."
"It's bad isn't it."
"I just feel your trying too hard, I mean blood? really?"
"Every man is scared of blood, that's a fact. Why do they use it in so many stories then?"
"Sorry but it's not working for me."
"How dare you. For that I shall punish you with the burning wrath of a thousand suns, and the scolding flame of a billion stars, and the..."
At this point he rambled on for hours upon hours, so I took a ten page novel and finally started reading it, I could finally do something other than being on the computer all day. After one whole year I finished the book, and discovered how to defeat the demon that lingered to my computer.
"...and the vast power of a thousand seas, and the crushing strength of a million mountains. Now I shall begin the curse," (clears throat) "behold my immense power- hey what are you doing?"
I understood everything now, it had all became so clear to me. I reached for the mute button.
"No don't!"
I pressed it, and his incessant voice was gone after all this time. The peaceful silence and birds chirping outside were like music to my ears, I could relax at last. I slouched in my computer chair and looked up at the ceiling with a smile, letting out a deep sigh I had been waiting for.
"Just a good ol' Saturday."
Category:Trollpasta
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck