Da Man is Smiling: Ben Takes A Watery Dirtnap Spinoff

Hey yo, remember that shit Ben did a while back 
Motherfuckers said it wasn't gonna work 
That crazy shit, yeah the stupid shit 
Hey yo Benny! 
Hey man why don't you come off the ocarina for a minute 
And bust this crazy shit
[BEN]
...Woke up quick, at about noon...
Just thought that I had to be in the cartridge soon 
I gotta get drunk before the 4th day begins 
Before my mother starts bitchin about Jeff 
About to go and damn near went blind 
Young Hylians at the pad throwin up triforce signs 
Ran in the house and grabbed my clip 
With the Hero's Bow on the side of my hip 
Bailed outside and Z-pointed my weapon 
Just as I thought, the fools kept steppin 
Jumped on the horse played the song for my ride 
I got front back and side to side 
Then I let the alpine play 
Bumpin new shit by DWA (Deku's With Attitude] 
It was gangsta gangsta at the top of the list 
Then I played my own shit, it went somethin like this:
Cruisin down the street on my horse 
Jockin the bitches, slappin the hoes Went to the park to get the scoop 
Terminians out there cold shootin some hoops 
A cart pulls up, who can it be? 
A mask salesman rolled, kilo g 
He rolls down his window and he started to say it's all about makin Majora pay
 
chorus* 
Cuz the boyz n tha clock town are always hard
You come talkin that trash we'll pull your card
Knowin nothin in life but to play legit
Don't quote me Link, cuz I ain't said shit 
[BEN] 
Down on bitches in the place to give me the pace 
He said my man Jadusable is on freebase 
The boy jadusable was a friend of mine 
Til I caught him in my horse tryin to steal my alpine 
Chased him up the street to call a truce 
The silly motherfucker pull out a slingshot 
Little did he know I had a loaded heros bow 
Jadusable dead, Clock Town times front page 
chorus*
[BEN] 
Bored as hell and I want to kill
So I went to a spot where the Moon Children chill 
The children out there, makin that dollar 
I pulled up on my Epona
They greet me with a potion and I start drinkin 
And from the Kotake's my breath start stinkin 
Love to get Zelda, to rock that body 
Before I left I hit the bacardi 
Went to her castle to get her out of the pad 
Dumb hoe says something stupid that made me mad 
She said somethin that I couldn't believe 
So I grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave 
She started talkin shit, wouldn't you know? 
Reached back like a pimp and slapped the hoe 
Her father jumped out and he started to shout 
So I Z-targeted him and knocked his whole ass out 
chorus*
[BEN] 
I'm rollin hard now I'm under control 
Then wrapped the master sword round the telephone poll 
I looked at my sword and I said, oh brother I throw it in the gutter and go buy another 
Walkin home and I see the g ride 
Now ket is drivin kilo on the side 
As they busted a u, they got pulled over 
It was Gannon dressed in a dark green nova 
Ket got beaten for resistin arrest 
He socked the pig in the head for rippin his guess 
Now g is cut for doin the crime 
For defense on the boy, he'll do some time 
[eazy-e] 
I went to get them out but there was no bail 
The fellaz start to riot in the Hyrule Castle jail 
Two days later in Hyrule court 
Kilo g on trial straight cold cut a fork 
Distruption of a court, said the judge 
On a six year sentence my man didn't budge 
Bailer came over to turn him in 
Kilo g looked up and gave a grin 
He yelled out fire!, then came suzi 
The bitch came in with a sub-machine uzi 
Guards shot the bitch but didn't hurt her 
Both up lands for attempted murder
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Zel-DUUHHH
Category:Jeff the Killer
Category:Music
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:LONG ASS TITLE