Assless Chaps

This is the story of a pouer fool wizurd. He held his kingdumb in his hart, and treeted its inhabbit ants with much respeck. Nobody dair appose the mitey ruler. He had immesurable majick, majick so strong he once gave Miley Cyrus an ass to twerk with. Most fered him cuz of this unspekeable pouer, but he was a fair king. 
==Cocklier the Grate==
Cocklier was a great leader of a region in West Africa. Not the black Africa but the other one. He lived in a cave many thousands of years ago. His being the only cave in all the land with HBO and HustlerTV (who he subsequently was stealing from the king of the neighboring land of Africanistan). He would often aloud the siticens of his country to sit on his couch and watch there fave or it shows. The leader of Africanistan grew sus pitcheous of his reception being blurry and wouldnt stop until he found the cause. Which led him to West Africa.
"COCKLIER! How dare you watch my subscription to HustlerTV. All the cock and titties are blurry in my land b cuz of you!" A booming voice spoke from the cave opening.
"Deeznuts Suckingood, I was cure eous to when you would make this disc overy." Replied Cocklier with much deepness in his speaking tone.
They fought to the death and Cocklier was killed.
==Deeznuts Suckingood Pillages West Africa==
He would have any way but he wasnt very ed jew cated. He did know the meaning of the word pillage, so he fucked everybody instead. Untill all the men and women were pregnant. After 9 months the village people shit out hundreds of tiny testicals, and those testicals writhed in pain as the made contact with the cold water of the toilet for the first time. The testicals would grow to be servants to Deeznuts, doing his bidding with out question. Often time finding grate deels on E-Bay and BeeZid.net. They would also carry out his evil plans. Deeznuts didnt have any room for evil plans only good plans, so they would have a priest come and bless the evil plans, exercising the plans that werent too far possessed to be brought back to good. 
One of these plans was to make everybody wear assless chaps. That way everyone would be dressed the same and nobody could make fun of the others. But Miley Cyrus with her now gigantic booty made everybody else feel sad. None of them had marvelous backsides like she did. Even Sharkiesha had a small butt compared to Miley. Deeznuts loved the bickering between the village people and Miley. He would video tape these confrontations and put them on worldstarhiphop.com. It was at this point he remembered that I'm spelling words too correctly and began to get very ill. The only thing that would cure his illness was a blowjob from Katey Perry.
This was a problem, because this was a few thousand years before she was to be born. And time travel hadnt been invented yet, because I cant think of a creative enough way to integrate it into the story at this point. Every night he would have nightmares of cumming on a dark horse. After a month or so of this he thought to read between the lines. Cumming on a dark horse, dark whores. He would travel to black Africa, and find an ebony prostitute to blow a load on, this would surely cure his illness. It didnt, instead he got even more sick with gator aids, and died shitting blood from his mouth and his penis.
The people of the village wore the assless chaps in his honor for all eternity, until their group got split up in the 1980s. To this day when you play the YMCA backwards you can hear Deeznuts hitting the floor, as he took one final breath.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:English Class Failure