nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Ball Removal Operation

Once the balls are removed, the body will adapt and pee will be stored in the shaft, eventually.
Naturally the body will heal, and once the body realizes its urine storing facilities have been removed, it will heal the area after being applied with antiseptic and stitching. After about three months, the groin area will send a hormonal signal to the brain, informing it of a bodily loss. In sequence, the body will reroute the piss to the shaft. This gives it a faster and optimized route to release, as it is a direct linear connection between the source, your cock, and the external(s). This allows for high frame rate pissing (HFRP) once the balls are culled. How? Because it is so that as there are less nerve cells and nerve routes to send the signal through, the overall energy consumption for signal transmission is reduced, which is efficient in praxis. ((think of the: BBC) bladder, ball(s), and cock unit and it's energy consumption). With this, you've essentially just macro keyed your dick. Now yuo see...This is actually a worthwhile endeavor. Unlike the treacherous and invasive practice of circumcision, this surgical practice would optimize the BBC unit; forgoing the caveat of losing our natural sensitivity in the penis, and general groin area. Another amazing discovery is that the vascular system does not consciously realize a smaller unit overall. So evidently the same amount of blood will be delegated into the smaller unit of Bladder and Cock. And therefore will lead to an increase in penis and penis-head girth and length; with a higher girth ratio.
In summary, although the Balls are a great ornamental piece in the scheme of Cock and Ball, with a myriad of cultural and historical value and implications, they are merely a decorative piece with an inconsequential purpose. And in my writing this paper, we discover that in their absence is practical everyday use for the modern 21st Century man.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Balloons

We all have memories. When I was little, my father used to sell balloons. Very colorful ones too. Every day my dad gave me one balloon. Everyone of those balloons are stuck in my mind. They are... Stuck.
Every picture of me has a balloon in my hand or beside me. But I wish I could take them back.... Because those balloons are taking over my life.
I didn't feel good today. I felt uneasy and strange. I lay in my couch anxious, but don't know what I'm anxious about. I then fell asleep. but I had visions of red balloons floating in the air. Dark red. Almost the color of blood. I then woke when I heard a sound... Of rubber squeaking.
My heart sank. I went to see what it was, hoping it wasn't anything I was dreaming about.
But... Unfortunately. A red... Balloon, right next to a picture of me. But the balloon was getting larger, it inflated until it popped! Blood, all over the walls and floor and me.
I quickly ran downstairs to see many red balloons about to burst. I kept reassuring myself it was just my mind. But the sound of the POP. Was just to real.
I'm typing this just to warn you. Good memories can't always be "Good."
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Dreams
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Old Shit
Balls

One evening, Tommy had been digging in his garden only to uncover a large, round, white-skin colored object. He tried to yank the thing out of the ground, but it had been quite stuck, and he tugged as hard as he could until it came out of the ground. Tommy heard something moan and he ran away, terrified.
When Tommy went inside, he showed the skin-colored thing to his mother (who thought it was an unusual sort of vegetable) and said that they would add it to their stew later on for dinner.
When dinner came around, Tommy's father carved the thing into three pieces and they had cooked it in their stew. After eating, the three were ready to go to sleep. Tommy went to his bedroom, and almost instantly had fallen asleep, but he had woken with a start as he had heard a strange howl coming from outside:
"Where are my ba-a-a-alls?"
Tommy covered his head up and shut his eyes, hoping to just get back to sleep, but he shot his eyes open again as the voice was even louder:
"Where are my ba-a-a-alls?"
Tommy let out a breath and kept his covers over his head, shivering. The voice could be heard at his back door, downstairs:
"Where are my ba-a-a-alls?"
The back door had been heard being opened and shut, and the stairs being climbed slowly. Thump, thump, thump. Tommy kept the covers over his head and his eyes shut tight as the voice had now reached his bedroom door:
"Where are my ba-a-a-alls?"
Tommy, frozen with fear, heard his door open, and felt a presence in his room walk right up next to him and yank off the covers...
"YOU ATE MY BALLS!"
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Beings
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Title that makes babbies laugh
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Balls, the Talkin' Dog

Little Kid: OH, a puppy!
Balls: I'm a dog, not a puppy.
Little Kid: Oh, okay...
Balls: How about you come to my alleyway? I have a treat for you.
Little Kid: OKAY!
in the alleyway*
Little Kid: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH *crunch*
He's BaaaaaaaaaALLLS, the Talkin' Dog!
----
Old Man: Hai dere, little dog. What's your name?
Balls: My name is Balls.
Old man: And you talk. That's amazing!
Balls: You know why they call me Balls?
Old man: No... why?
Balls: Because it's the first thing I bite.
crunch*
He's BaaaaaaaaaALLS, the Talkin' Dog!
----
Store: Oh, hai, doggy. What can I get you today?
Balls: Do you have a knife?
Store Owner: Uh... sure... What kind of knife?
Balls: A big one. Possibly with... blood on it?
Store Owner: Uh, not really...
Balls: Are you proud of your dick?
Store Owner: Yeah... wh- why?
Balls: Because... I'm gonna turn you into a girl.
crunch*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
He's BaaaaaaaaaaAALLS, the Talkin' Dog!
----
----
Based on the character in the Alchestbreach videos. Feel free to add your own "Balls" stories above this line. But please evade the Trollpasta cliches (And then a skeleton popped out, etc.) Oh, and uh... Balls can't die. >.>
Category:Animulz
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Balls.exe

I was just relaxing but I looked at my balls and saw my balls were bleeding hyper realistic blood from their eyes. I said "you silly sausages your not supposed to be bleeding." but then my balls told me "we're evil now and are going to kill you." I sure was frightened and started running away but my balls were still on me and it didn't work. So then I went to my doctors office and the doctor said I had "testicular cancer." I looked at him funny and said "speak egglish." But it was too late because my balls already killed me and it was all a dream the whole time.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Hyper-realistic
Category:Dreams
Category:Shortpasta
Balls across my face

Ok, so I'm not gay alright? I want balls across my face when I sleep. Not just any balls but big black, greasy, wart infested donkey-sized balls. It should belong to a big mf who grunts as he uses my throat as a personal cumdump. The sweat and hair from his balls should stick to my face. I want to feel how he tightens up when he shoots his murky, weeks old clunkly milk-like semen down my throat. I chew the clunky mess, getting some in my nose and blowing bubbles while he strokes my hair and calls me a good boy. I'm not gay, I know this is a fantasy every man has.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Bambi 10

Bambi stands over the shivering form of a blood soaked hunter looking down with cold dead eyes. Any compassion that was once in the deer's heart fled long ago like the innocence of a first spring. The man, if you could call what's left of him a man, reaches for his rifle a few inches away, but Bambi steps down on his wrist with a sickening crunch. "Please!" the man begs. "I have a family." So did I once, thinks Bambi. Flower, Thumper, my Mother. All gone now. Gone along with any mercy I once had for these creatures. With a deft motion Bambi spins the rife so the barrel faces the hunter and places an antler in the trigger. "Do you know why they call me Bambi?" asks the deer. But the human doesn't understand. It doesn't matter. BAM! A shot rings out and then all is silent in the forest. They'll call it another hunting accident. But deep down they know the truth. Vengeance has a name. And that name, is BAMBI!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Shortpasta
Ban the Vomiting Emoji

So recently I stumbled across a post saying that the vomiting emoji (🤮) looks like it was giving head to Shrek. I had to start furiously jerking off while looking at vomiting emoji on Google images due to my overwhelming ogre fetish. The way the emoji is sucking Shrek's massive cock makes me horny as fuck. I continued beating my meat to this one image for twelve minutes straight until I finally came, then I realized what I had masturbated to.
I literally cannot unsee it so every time I saw the vomiting emoji I was forced to think about Shrek blowjob. One time while I was at work, but then I saw a 🤮 emoji, I instantly started jerking off because of how hot this image really is. People were shocked at first but when I told them it's ogre blowjob they all started masturbating together. Eventually I got fired for causing all this mess.
This could all be prevented if the vomiting emoji didn't look like someone giving head to Shrek. Please make it look less erotic so this doesn't happen again.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Shrek
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Shortpasta
Banana Washer - Ultimate Toy for Men

"Did you hear about the new company that's revolutionizing the way we wash bananas? They're called Banana Washers Inc. and they're taking the world by storm!
Attention all men who love bananas! Are you tired of trying to wash those pesky fruits by hand, only to end up with a mushy mess? Well, we've got the solution for you! Introducing the Banana Washer 3000 – the ultimate toy for men!
This high-tech gadget is designed specifically for the modern man who wants to enjoy his bananas in all their clean, juicy glory. Apparently, they have this secret process where they use high-pressure and specialized soaps to get all the dirt and grime off your bananas. And the best part? They do it all in under a minute!
I know, I know, you're thinking, 'But wait, don't bananas come clean from the store?' Well, think again my friend! The truth is, those bananas have been sitting on a truck for who knows how long, rolling around with all sorts of gross stuff.
That's why you need to get your hands on one of these Banana Washers ASAP.
So why wait? Get your hands on a Banana Washer 3000 today and take your banana-eating experience to the next level! You'll be the envy of all your friends (and probably your significant other too)."
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Bananas in Pajamas: Stop!

It was a pretty regular day, I was just channel surfing and came across a Bananas in Pajamas episode, it was just beginning, I remembered watching it when I was a toddler so I decided to watch a bit.
The episode was called, "Stop!"
When it began there was just a bathroom with the taps left on and the water was flooding onto the floor, to the left was a rocking chair, with one of the bananas in it, he was reading a story called, Stop!
There was nothing telling you which banana it was, and he just kept saying, STOP, STOP, STOP!
At this point I was slightly creeped out, but I kept watching, he then said, "Tell the others to Stop!"
"Stop what?" I kept asking myself.
And suddenly he replied which almost gave me a heart attack, "Stop stealing."
I was too stunned to speak when it said, "Stealing my soul, your soul, our souls."
Suddenly a second banana came out with a violin, and started playing this creepy tune, the taps mysteriously turned off.
You couldn't tell which banana he was either.
He pointed at me, and said "Why?"
Suddenly the TV, practically exploded like a firework, nothing got burned luckily but the doors were now locked, in my living room, I tried to open them but they wouldn't.
Then suddenly, I blacked out, when I woke the windows of the living room were boarded up with wooden planks. I tried to remove them but it was impossible, when I turned around in the corner of my living room was two bottles of water, a gun and a note, the note read, 'You are being punished, marooned, if you want to survive use the water, and if you don't use the gun.'
I eventually managed to escape and when I did there was another note, 'Tell no one if you value your life.'
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Stuff Blowing Up
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:TELAVISHUN
Category:Shortpasta
Band Camp

About half way through band camp, our director said "It's been very hot lately, and you guys have been working so hard. As a reward, tomorrow a fire truck is coming and will cool us off with the hoses."
The next afternoon we saw the fire truck coming down the road and cheered with excitement. However, we soon realized that the "firemen" were in fact skeletons. They hosed us down with their skeleton juice. We could not outrun the juice.
Now we are a skeleton band and our instruments are bones.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Skeletons
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Bandicam.avi

One day I went to ebay and bought a flash drive from a creepy old man. Did i mention this man was also slenderman, smile.jpg, and jeff the killer in one guy. I opened the flash drive, and there was files in it. OHHHH 2sp00ky. There was an avi file in it. It was eavil, because it was 666 kb and it smelled weird, like my grandpa's cousin, who was sent to jail because he held up a gas station, he stabbed five people, with a spoon, and drank the gasoline, and died, but they put his dead body in prison to make sure his demonic soul couldn't escape. It also kinda smelled like piss, like the dashcon ball pit. When I opened the file, what I saw haunted me like a wrecking ball. It was an audio file actually, what a twist. It was the sound of farting. At the sound of that farting, I died. They put my dead body in prison. I have become reanimated by the farts. To warn you guys. Whenever you hear the sound of farts, run. Move somewhere lives, like Tijuana. K, thanks for watching, see you guys next time.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:File Extensions
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Loads of Characters
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Banjo-Kazooie: SSS (Super Scary Story)

So, I was just looking at some things on eBay, and I saw a X-box 360, and it was for free! And I bought it. Some days later, I got my X-box 360. I was very happy. When I could, I turned on my new X-box. Of course it was used, so I didn't really expect that it will be like new. There was already a profile, and it had X-box live gold, so of course, I used it. At first, I looked if they had any arcade games, because I didn't want to buy anything... Well, they had only two games, that were Banjo-Kazooie and Banjo-Tooie. I was kinda happy, because those games are amazing. So, I played the first game, Banjo-Kazooie. When I was at the start screen, there was one saved game, and they had all jiggyes and notes, but surprising was, that there was 00:00 playtime. It seemed kinda weird, but I thought it was glitched or something like that. I started a new game on other save file. At first it was normal, but when I got to the first world - Mumbo's Mountain - there were no grumblins, no Conga, bassically, there was nothing, and the only thing remaining was the world. I got a bit confused, because I remembered this world really much, and this wasn't normal. I explored the world, and after some minutes I was going to Mumbo's hut, expecting that he won't be here, but I was still having a bit of hope. When I got in, the Mumbo's hut song wasn't playing, but at last, there was Mumbo. When I got to talk to him, he said "Mumbo welcome Banjo, Mumbo felt lonely". This was actually all he said, no matter how I was trying to make him say something other. When I got to that Mumbo-pad thing, Grunty's laught was heard. I got somewhat transported to Bublegloop swamp, but then I was fastly transported to a lava world. There was a sign, and I could read on it "Mount Fire Eyes". And when I saw those things I didn't have to, so a skeleton from Mad Monster Mansion popped out from my new X-box and killed me, and then it deleted my save file and sold the X-box on eBay.
Category:Vidya games
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:And then a skeleton popped out
Category:Im died
Category:Trollpasta
Banjo-Kazooie: The Scary Versioon

This is a scarty thign that hapened to me once. What youre about to read is not a parody pasta. This sotry is about the N64 classic Banjo-Kazooie, developed by Rareware, published by Nintendo, released on May 31, 1998 in North America, released July 17, 1998 in Europe, and released Devember 6, 1998 nin Japan. Isn't it odd how North AMerica hgets it first, but the devleopedr is Euripoen, and the puisplishedr is Japanese.? I certnily od not think so,. Thisd story is also totlly true,.
==Section heading==
It all started one day hwen i was playing Banjo-Kazooie on Virtual Console on Game Cube using the NES controller. I was orignally gonig to be palying Sonic 2 in this sotrym but i changeded the mind. Anywhose, I was fighting Gruntilta, she's a withc, but she was originally going to be a giant. Anywhose, I was gifhting Gruntilda, the witch who was orginally gonig to be a giant, when all of sudden, I was sucked down a giant black hole. JIGGLYPUFF THAN APPEARED! She sang me to slepe, when I aowken I akseded her whh she had done what hse do. She said all "Jigglypuff!" She then disappeared into thing air. I wa s at the obttom ogf the black hole. There was nohting theere but me and a scary image of Aquaman that scared me. I was inthere for the next 25 years.
==Section heading==
Wehn I finnaly ogt out of the blackhole, the entire earth had been destroyed, DESTROYED!!!!!! I was all that remianed. I dind't like this one bit at all. What was I to do? The only logincal thing. What is the obly logical thing you may be asking me as you read this story irhgt now? The onyl logical thing to tdo was what I am about tho say was what I did. I used my psychic powers to reset all tiemmmm adter me not going in black ohle. I was vback where I was now. I was convinvced it was all a fdream. But it wasn't, I was convinced of that. How was i convinced? NBecause when I looked up, I saw my dadd wand he said
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:NINTENDO SIXTY-FOOOUR
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:English Class Failure
Category:TOTALLY NOT UNFINISHED U GUIZE
Category:Stupid is as the main character does
Category:Shortpasta
Banjo Tooie: The Darkness Rises

Back in 2011 I bought a glitchy copy of Banjo Tooie for the Nintendo 64 for an extremely cheap price. The game models were screwed up and I heard a knock at the door. I answered the door and a Banjo plush was at my doormat covered in blood and sweat. I ran to my parents to show the Banjo plush. but by the time we got to plush the plush disappeared without a trace. My parents thought I was going coo coo crazy. I sold my glitchy copy of Banjo Tooie on ebay.
2 years later I made an Xbox Live Account and I bought Banjo Tooie for Xbox Live Arcade and I had fun with it, but just then I heard a knock at the door again. The Banjo plush was back and this time it wasn't alone this time. The Kazooie and Mumbo plush was covered in flesh remains of a human. I slammed my door hard and almost had a heart attack. I didn't want to call the police because they'll think I'm crazy, so I went back to playing Banjo Tooie and I completed the game, but then I heard footsteps coming and the Banjo, Kazooie, and Mumbo plushies came to my room and tried to kill me and my parents. We ran away safely and burned down the house. We went to get a new house and tried our best to forget the incident that happened.
5 years passed. I thought it was over, but a few months ago, I began having nightmares. In the nightmares, I was strapped to a table, and the Banjo plushie was standing over me. He told me that I needed to finish what he started. One day, I found a Banjo cartridge in the mail. It looked just like the cursed cartridge that started it all. I had the urge to play the game, so I did. As I played, my body morphed into a sexy bear body. "Gah-huh!" I was now Banjo. My mom walked in and screamed. "Why is there a bear in our house?" "You don't understand mom." I tore her to pieces like any vicious bear would. After killing my mom, I killed my dad, then went on a rampage across town. Several months later I tracked down Masahiro Sakurai and forced him to put me in Super Smash Bros Ultimate as DLC. My power continues to grow.
I am Banjo. I am god. Pray to me every night or I will eat you.
Category:Not Sure if Troll or Trying to Be Serious
Category:NINTENDO SIXTY-FOOOUR
Category:Living Objects
Category:Dreams
Category:Cliche Madness
Banjo and Kazooie.exe

Me and my friend were looking for games for are NS64. We found a copy of banjo and kazooie. We went the coster. The coster said you can it for $2. We give him some money and ran home.
We ture on the NS64. We played the game. Something is worng. The tille of the game was named banjo and kazooie.exe. The game had no tooty in it. They will playing as kazooie. 
banjo HAED red eyes. Kazooie walk showle to banjo. A textbox pop up in the game, It said
DO'T YOU DARE TURE OFF THE GAME.
Me and my friend ran out my room. We told are parnets. We said banjo has red eyes. My parnets said to take a break. It was a 2 hour break. Arter the break. Me and my friend went back to playing more banjo and kazooie.exe. A text box pop up in the game. It said   
YOUR DAD WILL LIKE THIS,
WHAT WERE IS YOUR DAD?
I stared to play level 2. 
The map was name banjo landy. Everything was red and black. A haunted house was the main thing in the map. Kazooie was mad at something. It was about banjo with the red eyes. Kazooie walk up to banjo again.
banjo look behind. A text pop up in the game. it said
WANNE PLAY HIDE AND SEEK......
Everything was on fire. banjo was making fun of kazooie. Banjo was runing show. For about 2 mins, banjo hit kazooie, kazooie  was crying. Banjo kill kazooie. Me and my friend play as tooty.
Level 3 was named
Tooty kill's ????????
The map was now glay, black and red. For about 5 mins, a flash apper in the game. And there was Blood apper in the game.
My mom said will have to go to a party. The party had 5 year olds. Me and my friend said to my mom.
Me: can well get the NS64 plz
Mom: yes
me:ok
I went to my friend's room. Banjo apper in the game. I hear something. My friend told me to look behind you. 
It was a banjo with red eyes in real life
Banjo said 
YOU WILL DIE
Category:Trollpasta
Category:NINTENDO SIXTY-FOOOUR
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:English Class Failure
Category:File Extensions
Category:Shortpasta