The Pains of Shrek

It was finally here. The day they had waited for with bated breath, in wonder, and in fear.
Their first reaction had been overwhelming joy. But a doctor's visit had revealed alarming news: the doctors were prepared to do everything they could, but it was uncertain if Shadow could survive the delivery.
Shrek had begged his lover not to go through with it. It was dangerous, and he couldn't bear the thought of losing him. 'We could adopt!' he had pleaded. But Shadow was unwavering; he desperately wanted to bring their child into the world, even if it ended up costing his own life. Shrek eventually came to terms with the hedgehog's wishes. This was so incredibly important to him.
Seeing him lying there on the hospital bed, in the struggles of labour, Shrek could only think that he had never been more beautiful.
"Shrek...I love you," Shadow said shakily.
"Don't worry, my hedgehog-cicle," Shrek said, grasping his thin, hedgehoggy hand. "You're going to be just fine."
"Promise me, you'll take good care of her..."
Shrek placed a loving hand on his hedgehog angel's cheek. "You know I will. But you're going to help me! We're going to raise our beautiful child together, okay?"
"Of course..." Shadow smiled.
It was just then that Shadow gave birth to their new child right after he smiled. The child emerged out of Shadow and saw the lights from the above.
The child was a mix of a hedgehog and an ogre. "Oh, what a beautiful child we have," Shadow said, all weak and drowsy. The child was then given to Shadow to see.
After seeing the child for a few minutes, Shadow went to an eternal slumber that make Shrek sad. Shrek was in disbelief from seeing that Shadow has died.
"Shadow my hedgehog-cicle! Don't die on me! I thought we'll raise our child together!" Shrek said in a melancholy tone. Shadow never replied to Shrek.
It seems that Shrek was now going to be a widower after the death of Shadow, but he made himself a promise. A promise for Shadow who is now in heaven. He promised to take care of the child all by himself and be the best parent ever. Then Shrek got a call. It sounded like shadow. But if shadow was dead than...WHO WAS PHONE????????
The world may never know. Possibly, Fionna, I guess.
Then, Shrek got fucked by Eminem. Later Shrek was pergert. He had a baby. The babies first words were the lyrics to Rap God. Then, the babies got older and became adults. One day shrek heard moaning cumming from there room. The saw that they were practicing the SEX. O MAH GAWD! SO SPOOPY. AND THEN A SKELETON POPPED OUT. THE END. OR IS IT. I DON'T HAVING A FRICKING CLUE. YOU FRICKEN FRICKS CAN'T EVER BEQUENCH YOU EH YOU'RE FANTASIES CAN'T EVER BE QUENCHED CAN THEY. ALL OF A SUDDEn, SAMMYCLASSICSONICFAN CAME AND JOINED THE FUN, SAYING THE EX ACT SAME QUOTE TO EVERYONE, "YOU FRICKEN FRICKS CAN'T EVER BEQUENCH YOU EH YOU'RE FANTASIES CAN'T EVER BE QUENCHED CAN THEY"  SHREK WAS PISSED OFF AND ROAR THE MIGHTY OGRE RAOR, INJURING SAMMYCLASSICSONICFAN FROM THE PROCESS OF THE RAOR. SAMMY DECIDED TO COUNTER BY SCREECHING SO LOUD THAT IT IS LOUDER THAN THE ERUPTION OF KRAKATOA VOLCANO BACK IN 1883. THEN, MORE SKELETONS APPEAR AND DID THE SKELETON DANCE WHICH MADE SHREK SCARED SHREKLESS AND SAMMYCLASSICSONICFAN CURLED UP INTO A BALL LIKE HIS FAVORITE CHARACTER, SONIC THE HEDGEHOG. TO THIS DAY, NO ONE KNEW WHAT HAPPENED IN THE SWAMP. "Use your imagination"
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Loads of Characters
Category:Collab
Category:Blatant Ripoffs
Category:Vidya games
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:WHO WAS PHONE?