Kitten

"Kitten" is the 33rd episode of Wiksteria Lane.
==Summary==
Poor young Cat5sparkles has been kidnapped and taken into the non-wiki world by a disgusting man, and it is up to Rena, Jdg and Villain to join forces and save her. Lynette starts to make friends on the Lostpedia, and Gleek and Prima finally divorce, amicably. Meanwhile, Mary, Peep and Pll get together, and drunk.
==Plot==
Cat5sparkles rides in the backseat of James 1234's car. They have driven past the small town where James used to live with his family, his late wife and his son, Jdg98 - at the time, JoséGuerri98. However, their house was located on the outskirts of town, near the woods, with only one more neighboring house, in which lived an elderly man and his bed-ridden wife. James parks his car by the house, and Cat's attention is caught by how awful it looks: it is all darkened on the outside, looking very similiar to the template where Lynettefan2626 used to live on the lane, after it was burned down by Americana. Cat deduces immediately that her guardian's house suffered the same fate. James opens the door for her, and Cat asks why he brought her there. James explains that he was a little homesick, and thought it would be nice to show her where he used to live. He opens the unlocked front door, and Cat marvels at the ruins before her eyes. The whole place is darkened, inside and out, and looks like something straight out of a horror movie. "You lived here?" she asks, confused, to which he explains that he did, some time ago, with his wife and son, until the house burnt down and he had to move in with the neighbors. "But now.... I feel like staying here. At least for a little while." Cat is confused, but doesn't think much of the situation.
"What do you mean, he took her? Why would he take her?" Rena is confused at Jdg's claims that his father must have taken young Cat with him. Villain joins them, after realizing that they're discussing a missing daughter of his, and asks what is going on. Both of them are weirded out by his presence, considering what just happened with the video fiasco, but Jdg goes on to explain that there is a reason why he and his father parted ways: James is a disgusting pig who does bad things to children. Rena orders that Jdg explain himself, and the young man doesn't quite know what to say. "Jdg! You owe me an explanation. You owe me everything. You were going to tell me why you burnt your house down, why you killed your mother, why you moved to the lane. You were going to tell me everything, weren't you? Well, start right fucking now!" Jdg's eyes water up as he gathers the strength to tell him, "Just... just imagine... the worst possible thing a man, a father, could do to a child." Rena's eyes widen with shock and his chin drops as he realizes what he's talking about. "We have to go get her..." the Chat Mod says.
Cat is sitting down by the burnt table in James' old kitchen, and he comes into the house with a small grocery bag, telling her he got her the snacks she wanted from the store on the border of the town. Cat is gleeful, but he says, "First, a good ole sandwich. Gotta eat healthy." Cat frowns, but agrees. He opens up a drawer, and notices that his utensils are in a surprisingly good shape. Cat moves in to grab a knife, saying that she'll prepare her own sandwich. She then comments, "You know, your son can't even make a good sandwich. He always comes downstairs every morning and expects breakfast to be waiting for him. I started to make my own breakfast once I realized Rena couldn't make one worth a damn. But I like it when Lady cooks for us." James smiles at her attempt to make conversation with him. "Well, I'm sure your sister is proud that you're so skilled." He then worries about her handling the long, sharp knife, and Cat says, "I'm eight. I can use a knife." "That you can," he says, "My apologies." She goes on making her sandwich. He simply stares at her. She notices this and asks, "What is it?" "I'm just... admiring you. You're a very pretty girl." Cat doesn't know how to respond. "Thank you," she says, with no expression. She continues making the sandwich.
Lynettefan gets out of his car and heads on over to his new manor, at the Lostpedia. He is called over by a familiar voice, however. He turns around and notices Primadonna Girl, who smiles and walks over to him. Lynette asks what she is doing on that wiki, to which she explains to him that she was invited by an old friend of hers, Sunshine Princess, to have a drink, since they hadn't gotten together in a long while. "Turns out she's your neighbor, I guess," Prima says. "Yes, we've met. Charming woman." Prima nods. They are then quiet for a few seconds, and he breaks the silence by saying, "I didn't want to risk entering awkward conversation territory, but I think a little praise is due. The way you stood by your husband as he, well, made that shocking and compromising revelation... it was nothing short of commendable." Prima thanks him, saying they have been through some trying times because of his secret sexual orientation, but they have made amends and decided to move on their separate ways and find happiness elsewhere, whilst remaining good friends. "We're actually supposedly going to finalize the divorce today. We wanted to make it quick. He's promised me he'll be very fair." Lynette tells her that's very good, and she nods again. Silence. She then says, "Guess all there's left for me to do now now is find a guy who isn't disgusted by my nether region." She chuckles at herself, and Lynette does the same, politely, rather blown away by her candure. "Well," she says, "Nice talking to you. Good luck. With, you know, the new wiki. The new template, everything." Lynette thanks her. She turns around and walks away, and Lynette watches her as she goes. However, she looks back around, and their eyes meet again. She keeps on walking.
Lady Junky is horrified to learn that James supposedly took her little sister with him, to harm her, but Rena does his best to calm her down, and promises he will get her back. Villain fan has stocked up on arms, and Jdg explains that James probably took her to their old town, it's the only place he can think of. "We used to live on the outskirts of town, isolated from the rest of the community... If the house is still up, chances are that's where we'll find them." Rena starts to say, "Well, we gotta get going. They've got a good advance on us, chances are he's already..." he can't finish the sentence. His chin trembles. "My little kitten..." Villain says, tears forming in his eyes. He then says they can take his car, and goes out to get it. After he's gone, Jdg turns to Rena and says, lowly, "Are we really gonna go with him?" Rena gives him a confused look, and Jdg adds, "I mean, we saw what he did. With Mary. The guy is clearly a fucking creep, he's sick. We're gonna save a young girl from a molester and bring along the guy who fucked her also underaged sister?" Rena, looking angry, says, "He's her father. He's Cat's father, if he wants to go and help, I can't just tell him no." Rena loads up his own gun and puts a case of bullets in his pocket, and Jdg says, "I can't help but feel you're still mad at me..." "Of course I'm fucking mad at you!! You kept me in the dark, Jdg! After everything we've been through! After all that crap you gave me about keeping my 'cancer' from you, which, by the way, I did to spare you!... You neglected to tell about me about this huge, dark, criminal portion of your past, and worse than that, you neglected to tell me that your father, a man I welcomed into my home out of the goodness of my heart, is a pedophile! A pedophile! When we had an eight-year-old running around the house! I am mad! I am livid, I am furious, I am so fucking frustrated!..." Rena stops lashing out. A few angry tears come out. Jdg starts to tear up as well. Lady shows up again, having come out from the burnbook where she went to wipe her tears, and gives Rena a hug. "Please bring her home to me..." she says, in her thick French accent, with tears streaming down her face. Rena kisses her head.
"So what's tha happs, mah betches?" Devious Peep sits down on a chair by the entrance to her boss' new manor. Mary and Pll sit in other chairs next to her, Mary in the middle, Pll at the right and Peep at the left. Mary says, "Well, I recently came to realize that even though I have many, many, many... many, many... many many many many many lovers... I have like zero friends. So since you two hoes are back from your vacation and I now live in the template where you work, we're besties now. So drink up. Let's get hammered and talk about shit." Mary pours some cocktail mix for Pll, who says, "I drink to that." Peep says, "Ya know, this is sum real bitchin' shit right here, sista. I can't remember the last time I had some gurl talk." "I know, it's been forever for me too," Mary says, "And I think I figured out why. The thing is, women are bitches." "Mhm," Pll nods; "They be hoes, women they be hoes..." "I just, like, I fucking hate women, you know? I wish women were more like men. I wish they were less whiney and girly and that they had, like, penises and stuff, you know?" "Mhm," Pll nods again; "Gotta have a penis," Peep adds. "I just feel so much more at ease when I'm with guys, they're more laid-back and fun and... you know they fart and burp and it's no big deal. I once cut a fart near my girlfriends back in Spain and they shunned me out, saying I was gross. And I'm like, bitch, please, it's so fucking natural, who doesn't fart?" "Mhm," Pll nods, and farts. The other two women laugh out loud. "Aw dayum gurl that's just nasty!" Mary says, "See, that's what I'm talking about. Why the fuck is it so fucking wrong if a woman cuts one? We eat too! We get gas too! We sit on the can and shit like everyone else!" They keep drinking. "Ya know what," Peep says, "All this talk is making me wanna get mah gas on." She cuts a louder fart. The other women chuckle. "Aw dayum gurl I just broke the damn farting record," she says. "What you're gonna break is the damn chair," Mary comments, and Pll adds, "If you shit chair I no clean it." They laugh, and drink. "Come on hoe it's yo turn, it's yo turn," Peep tells Mary. The young Spanish beauty opens her ass cheeks and the earth trembles. The other women laugh hysterically. Lynette suddenly comes out of the house and asks what they are doing. "We cutting farts! Did you come to smell them?!" Peep asks, prompting the three of them to laugh even more. Lynette gives them a disgusted look, which is only aggravated when he actually picks up on the nauseating smell. He asks if those chairs are from his dining room, to which Mary says, "No, sweetie, we farted so much we pooped them out." They laugh. Lynette goes back inside, incredibly disgusted. "He so fine I'd ride that honker-ass booty with mah strap-on till he begged for mercy," Peep says; "Yeah, I did him," Mary says, downing another drink. "Oh no you di'nt!" "Oh yes I did." "Oh no you di'nt!" "Oh yes I did." "Oh no you di'nt!" "Oh yes I did." "Oh no you di'nt!" "Oh yes I did." "Oh no you di'nt!" "Oh yes I did." "Oh no you di'nt!" "SHUT YOUR FAT COON FACE, I SAID I DID!" Pll mouths a "Oh ho ho ho," before downing another drink. The other two do the same. "This is fun," Mary says.
The night is starting to fall on the town of Hollow Lane, where James keeps Cat, out on the border. The night comes sooner and darker in the woods area. Cat looks out the shattered window, and comments that it's starting to get a bit cold. James spreads out a blanket over the semi-burnt couch and tells her they can sit together and she can even sit on his lap, in his arms, for warmth. Cat tells him she'd rather go home, because they have heating there, to which James replies, "But..." He stops, not knowing what else to say next. They look at each other for a while. "Look, sweetie," he starts to say, "The thing is, Rena asked me to take you elsewhere for a while, while he resolved all of the issues that are currently... well, troubling your family. I mean, you saw that video, same as me. Your sister Lady is very shook up. Your father has some explaining to do. Rena thought it'd be best if I kept you away from the crossfire. And since I didn't know where else to go, well, here we are. Now come. Sit with me." "And do what?" she asks, "The TV doesn't even work. Not that there's any electricity still, is there?..." James struggles for words, and ultimately says, "Look, just, j-just, come here. I'll make you feel better." "...How?" "I'll warm you up." Cat is taken back by this remark. "I... I haven't seen the rest of the house," she tells him. "Oh?" "I wanna... see... upstairs." James tells her he's not sure if that's such a good idea, since the stairs were badly burnt and might collapse, but Cat says she'll tread carefully. She starts heading upstairs, walking slowly up the staircase, and then finds her way to a random bedroom. She closes the door behind her and leans against it. She lets herself slide down to the floor, worry in her eyes, and inhales deeply.
Gleek and Prima are sitting across from one another in a room at the only Glee Wiki law firm. Their respective divorce representatives sit by them, and Gleek's says that if they sign the papers laid out before them, they will be officially, legally divorced. Gleek takes the papers, gives them a skim, and signs his name. He then slides them over to Prima, who promptly signs them as well. Their marriage is now over. They smile at each other, genuinely. "Guess I'll meet you back home, huh?" Prima tells her ex-husband. "Guess you will," he says, before standing up. She moves around the table, towards him, and takes his arm in hers. "For what it's worth... I think a part of me will always see you as the sweet, twenty-something little nerd who tried to swoon me at that diner where we met," she tells him. Gleek smiles and kisses her on the forehead. The lawyers are very confused.
"Well, I suppose I can always make room for more people on my team. Especially those driven by a certain... how shall I put it?... Thirst for... justice. Yes, that would be the proper term. Justice. I can relate to you. To what you are going through. And rest assured, I am well aware that I could use your help with my future plans. My current assistant, well, she's... colorful, but not exactly professional. I'm sure you've noticed the drinking, flatulence-riddled spectacle by my front door. I need someone by my side who is skilled, smart, determined and willing to do anything it takes to serve me. I think you could very well be able to fill the void left by your former girlfriend. So... yes. Of course you're hired." Lynettefan holds out his hand over his desk and shakes IceBerry's. The former assistant/secretary to Gleekobsessed smiles, as Lynette tells him, "Welcome to the big league." "Thanks... boss."
"You know, it's a fact that... I fuck a lot. And I mean a lot. I've had more dick in me than I've had oxygen. But I've never, ever been in a stable relationship. And I think I just figured out why: I hate men," Mary says, now even more drunk. "M.........hm," Pll says. "Men is dogs, they be dogs," Peep jumps in. "Best sex I ever had was with a dog," Mary says. Pll starts to say, pointing at them, "And, and, and, and, and... what?" "Pll, go home, you're drunk!" "I no is drunk, I drink fine, I, I..." she spills her drink on the floor. "Aw dayum! Good thing it's her job to clean that up," Peep says. "Pll, you're not making any sense, you're not being 'cohearing', you should stop drinking." Mary moves in to take Pll's glass away, but the maid snaps at her: "I cut your nipples!" "Okay, okay, sheesh... We just can't understand you, is all." "Bitch, puh-fucking-lease, I can never understand dis fool! Drunk or not," Peep comments, to which Mary replies, "It's true, I don't understand why it's so hard for you damn foreigners to just learn proper English. I'm Spanish, same as you, but I speak goodly." "Hold up, hold up, hold yo dick up, she's Spanish?!" The maid and the slut nod affirmatively. "What the LMAO?" Peep continues, "I thought she was Asian! Sista look Korean to me! I've been calling her Cook Pu this whole time!" "Is cool, is cool," Pll responds, "I call you 'skin-of-shit'." Mary chuckles, and says, "Hey, hey, it's alright, skin is nothing but a color." "You said it, mah hoe! But dayum, I wish I was white sometimes... Them crackers have it so good. It's a white man's world. Although, gurl, I've had so much cum on my face for a moment there I was caucasian." They laugh again. "LET'S COMPARE OUR BOOBIES!!"
As the night grows darker, Villain fan keeps on driving towards Hollow Lane, his heart beating fast. Rena sits on the passenger seat, and Jdg in the back, looking glum. Rena tells him, without looking back, "Okay, I think it's high time you spilled the beans. All of it." Jdg inhales, and then starts to tell his story: his father was an abusive man, constantly mistreating him, both verbally and physically. Eventually, Jdg grew tired of it, and snapped. One night, when his mother was supposed to be out with her book club, Jdg poured gasoline all over the house and set it ablaze, planning to kill his father inside. However, unbeknownst to him, his mother had gotten a headache and stayed in bed to nurse it, and was caught by the flames. James managed to get out of the house in the nick of time, saving himself, but didn't even bother going back for his wife. Jdg hadn't counted on being spotted, but their one elderly neighbor caught him with the cans, and therefore he went into hiding on Wiksteria Lane, under the care of his uncle, JMsapphireZ, who knew his brother James was a monster and agreed to help his nephew. "There you have it. That's... the story," Jdg says. Rena doesn't react. Doesn't even know how to. Villain keeps on driving, as fast as he can.
The three women by Lynette's door are completely wasted. Mary looks depressed, and starts to say, "Can I, can I tell you something, something that I can only tell you guys because you are my bestest friends in the whole wide world?" Peep says, "Of course, honey, you know you can tell us anything!" Pll adds, caressing Mary's cheek, "We love you like sister!" Mary starts to tear up, and says, "The truth is, and this is something I haven't been able to admit to even myself, I... I love Jdg. I do, I love him." Pll says, "That is so muy sweet. Who?" "Jdg, Jdg, isn't that that little faggot who is always following the Chat Mod around? I thought they were fuckmates, that they had a 'Batman & Robin' thing going on." "No, nah, no, it's not like that," Mary brushes this off, "And I... we made love and it was the only like time in my like life that I like made love and I was like, 'aw, I could get used to this...'" "You need to go get 'im, fool!" "Mhm!" "NOOOOOOOOO, no, no, I c-can't, not looking like this..." Pll scoffs, and Peep says, "Bitch you look fabufuckinglous go getcho man!" "No, no, I won't!" Pll grabs her chin and says, with determination, "Mi abuela me decía que todos salgamos de la vida exactamente lo que hemos luchado para salgar, y si no luchas por tu hombre, no lo conseguirás, y lo único que tendrás en tu vida es la memoria del pasado que los dos compartieron juntos, y recuerdos del futuro que nunca compartirán." Silence. Peep breaks it by asking, "What she say?" to which Mary replies, her chin still in Pll's grasp, "I don't know, I was lost in her beautiful Asian eyes." Pll burps in her face, and Peep asks, "Gurls what was we talkin' 'bout?" Neither one of them can remember, and the black loudmouth says, "LET'S GO INSIDE AND POP OUR PUSSIES!" A collective "Yaaaaaaaay" is heard.
Lynette sits in silence in his office, contemplating about his ex-fiancée, due to the flirtatious encounter he had had that day. He picks up his cell phone and calls her. On the other side, Lady picks up, slightly confused that he would reach out to her. "Oui?..." "Lady, I... I'm sorry. I, I honestly have no idea why I just called you, I... I guess I wanted to hear your voice..." Lady doesn't respond right away. When she does, she says, "My head is hurting. I should not talk." "Is everything okay? I mean... besides, what happened at the event..." "No. It is not. I... I don't know how to explain, but... the father of Jdg took Cat. My little Cat. I think... I think he wants to hurt her." She starts to sob over the phone. Lynette looks worried. "That's... awful. I am so sorry." "Rena and my papa left to get them. I am so... I don't know what to do, I feel... I..." Lynette tries to calm her down, "Lady, it's okay. It's gonna be okay. They'll get her, she'll be fine." "How you know?" "Because..." He doesn't know how to finish the sentence. He just looks forward, sadness and concern in his eyes. On the other side, Lady says, "I should go. Thank you." She hangs up. Lynette puts his phone down. And continues to sit in the silence.
Flashback - Cat5sparkles, a few months before, is standing alone at the bus stop where her schoolbus comes by everyday, next to her house. She starts to hum a song, without a care in the world, and, unbeknownst to her, someone looks at her from a distance. Americana makes herself visible, coming from behind a tree, talking on the phone. "Well," she says, "There's no one else here. If you want this done, I'll do it now." She takes out a handgun. "Wait," the voice on the other side says. We see it's Lynette, standing in his old office in his Wiksteria Lane template, "We're going about this all wrong. Villain fan has just found out about this daughter. We kill her now, and... well, it'll be rather fruitless, won't it?" "So... You're thinking that now?" Amy asks him, "When I'm already here." "I'm sorry, Americana. You do realize I have a lot on my mind, right? I'm getting married to a woman who is cheating on me! And I have to play the judge cos of that stupid kid you framed... Well, but that's gonna be fun," he says, wickedly. Americana asks what she does now. Lynette tells her, "Nothing. Come back to Wiksteria Lane. I'll make it up to you for wasting your time. Eventually, when the time is right, I'll send you back to kill the girl's mother. If not you, then someone else who works for me. Then Villain will bring her here, and... well... that's when the fun begins." "Yeah, you better make it up to me. I was actually hoping we could talk about me replacing Imma again," she tells him, now walking away from young Cat, who remains oblivious to what is happening. Lynette's grin disappears. Then, Mary comes in, saying, "Hey Lynette. I'm ready to start this secretary thing." Lynette tries to shush her, and Amy asks what that was. "Nothing. What? Nothing. Just... just come back. We'll talk about that." They both hang up. Americana gets back into her car, as Cat enters her schoolbus, looking gleeful.
The house where James used to live is now completely bathed in darkness. Cat comes out of her room, looking scared, and calls out for him, even though she doesn't want to. "Mr. James?... Can we go home now? I'm hungry..." James turns on a flashlight he had in his car, and tries to find the girl in the darkness. "Oh, there you are," he says. Cat is blinded by the yellow light, but recovers. He apologizes for that. "I'm cold, and hungry, please take me home," she begs of him. "Look, sweetie," he starts to say, "I don't know what else to tell you. I'm not taking you home." Cat looks worried. "Why?..." she asks. "Because I..." he doesn't know how to finish that. Cat does it for him: "Because... you're a pedophile." His eyes widen. "You want to... you want to violate me, don't you?" she asks him, in her utter innocence. "Sweetie, I..." "Please..." she tells him, tears forming in her eyes. James looks at her and suddenly sees someone else in her place: MissMayfair. The young brunette finishes the sentence, saying, "...Don't hurt me." James shakes his head and finds Cat before him again, under the light. The young blonde moves back, slowly, entering the kitchen. James tell her, "You don't have to worry. I don't want to hurt you. I'm not like that." Cat has tears streaming down her face, and says, "I just wanna go home..." "We can make this place a home. The two of us. It's going to look so beautiful." "Please..." she begs him, overwhelmed with fright. "Look, look... I get you," he says, "I understand. You're scared because, you're young and innocent, and... naïve. You're just a little girl. You don't know the least bit about men, do you? The opposite gender. You're worried that... that you might not like getting to know me. But... sweetie, I can assure you, once you do... it's the most wonderful thing." Cat is further creeped out. James starts to unzip his pants, but not unbutton them. Through the opened zipper he takes out his firm erection. Cat looks at it and starts to sob. He shushes her, moving in closer, and says, "It's okay, it's okay, sweetie, believe me, it's okay... Do you know what this is?" he asks, pointing at his organ. Cat nods, crying, and says, "Yes..." "Good... Good, that's good... Do you know... do you know what to do with it?" He moves in closer. Cat's back hits the kitchen table. "Yes..." she says. "Good. Of course you do. You're not a little girl. I was wrong, wasn't I? You're a woman already. You know what happens now, and you're alright with it, aren't you? Because you're wise beyond your years. So... just... relax. It'll be over before you know it. You know what to do, right?" Cat looks up at him. Under the beam of light. Her sad look turns into something else, as she tells him, "I told you..." He moves in closer. "I'm eight," she continues. He grabs her shoulders, and she finishes her sentence: "...I can use a knife." This said, she holds up the sharp knife she used earlier that day, having reached for it at the table, and swings it down towards her attacker's member. James lets out a horrifying scream and tears instantly flow from his eyes as his severed penis hits the floor of the kitchen. Cat is spattered by blood and rushes past him, sobbing. James keeps on screaming, panicking, feeling an immense pain, and grabs his flashlight and aims at his member, withering away on the kitchen floor, and cries, and lets out incomprehensible yelps. Cat tries to get out, but isn't strong enough to move the damaged, jammed front door, so she rushes upstairs, panting, trying to find her way back to the bedroom in the darkness. From the kitchen, James realizing what is happening, shouts, "NO, NO, NO, NO, NO I'M GONNA KILL YOU YOU LITTLE WHORE!!" He rushes after her, one hand over his bloody crotch and another holding the flashlight. He tries to rush up the stairs, but they collapse under his weight and he gets stuck in the middle. The flashlight tumbles down the steps and turns off, and James is left in the darkness, trapped in the burnt staircase, his crotch bleeding uncontrollably. He goes on screaming and screaming. Cat enters the bedroom, closes the door behind her and goes to the burnt window. She tries to open it, but it is also jammed. She then starts to bang on it, but worries about the glass shattering and stops. She is now trapped on the upper floor of a burnt house, with a pedophile standing between her and the only exit, which she couldn't open anyway. And she screams. At the full force of her lungs. "HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP! PLEEEEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!" The tears wash her face. And the darkened house, which usually sat in silence after being burnt, was now covered by the deafening screams of attacker and victim.
Category:Season 3 Category:Episodes