Billie Jean

"Little Billy's Not My Lover", informally known as "Billie Jean", is a 1982 song by Michael Jackson. The second single from his album "Thriller", it was initially about his pet llama Billie Jean, who he named after his favorite golfer Billie Jean King. However, when some kid named Little Billy sued Michael a few weeks prior, claiming that Michael groped his rear, Michael made this song in response. As soon as it was released, fans flocked to buy his records, and within three weeks, charted as a number 1 single in the Billboard 100, paving the way for Michael's career.
It was so successful, that it is one of the only singles in history to be certified diamond by the RIAA, making MTV realize that black people can make good music. It would also help Michael get away with more edgy songs, as it introduced the one move everyone remembers Michael for: the moonwalk. If Little Billy had not sued him, Michael's career would not have had the push it needed to weather all those claims of touching children. If you're wondering, yes, Little Billy's lawsuit was rejected by the court in early 1983 due to his name being mistakenly written as Billie Eilish.
== Background ==
=== Billie Jean, the Person ===
 is an old geezer who is primarily known for her tennis career. Despite her conservative parents pushing for her to be either a prostitute, trophy wife, or nun,All of which are the exact same. Billie would choose to do what the rest of her family done and play sports. Sadly, despite being proficient at all of them when she was only 3 years old, her parents would place her in a contract which meant she would never play any of the sports she was good at during this time. However, her parents would allow her to play tennis, which was considered a lady-like sport at the time. She would later obliterate the tennis pro and shemale chauvinist Bobby "Cathy" Rigby 6-4, 6-1, plus 2 of three falls in a Jello wrestling pit and 4 out of 7 games of Snap, not forgetting the all important 2 of 3 games of Rock, Paper, Scissors.
=== Billie Jean, the Llama ===
In early 1981, Michael bought a llama named Louie from some drug dealer in Peru. Disliking the name as it reminded him of a rock band he once saw. Watching Billie Jean King play golf, Michael had an idea: why can't he name his llama after Billie Jean so he can have an excuse to showcase his dance moves to her. In early 1982, Michael would consult Quincy Jones, his producer, to help him write a song worshipping her. However, when Billie stated that she disliked Michael's music in a press conference, Michael was so butt-hurt that he changed the song to make Billie seem like a evil person.
=== Billy Porter (Little Billy) ===
 is a flamboyant black dude who has had a highly successful acting career, which began in the 1990s with Star Search and peaked while he was at Broadway. However, before all that, Billy was a normal black kid living in R&B-infused Pennsylvania during the 1980s, being nicknamed Little Billy due to his small stature. Nothing of much importance occurred until 1981, when he attended a Jackson 5 concert. Being especially impressed with one of the younger kids named Michael, Billy asked his parents if he could stay a bit longer to try to meet the Jacksons. They agreed, and after the concert ended at 11:00 PM, Billy went to the backstage. Michael would grope Billy's rear before hee-heeing away.
== Production ==
After the lawsuit that Little Billy had tried to make occur was rejected in the courts due to that spelling mistake, Michael was allowed to have permission to speak about the lawsuit. Instead, Michael chose to dedicate most of his album "Thriller" to vividly describe his obsession with children. In his mind, the most logical thing to do would be to dedicate the first song to Little Billy. This was also due to Billie Jean King threatening to sue Michael if he released the demo song. As a result, production was rushed, with many of the resulting lyrics being low-quality compared to the original. However in late 1982, the song would be released.
== Covers and "parodies" ==
* In 1984, "Weird Al" Yankovic tried to get Michael Jackson to give him permission to make a parody of "Little Billy's Not My Lover" called "Jelly Beans". Sadly, Michael thought he was a cop and didn't respond to Al until the late 80s.
* In 1994, famous grunge band Nirvana got Michael Jackson to sing with them this song on stage. The resulting song was this.
* A study by Harvard researchers revealed that between 2004 and 2009, Tiger Woods sang a cover of the song called "Elin Nordergren's Not My Lover" for every single one of the 100+ women he had sex with.
== Track listing ==
=== 1983 release ===
# "Billie Jean" – 4:55
# "I (Really) Love Little Kids" – 6:13
=== Thriller 30 release ===
# "Billie Jean" – 4:55
# "P.Y.T (Pretty Young Thing)" – 3:19
# "Low-Quality Techno Song" – 2:55
== See also ==
* Billie Eilish
* Billy Joel
* Billie Joe Armstong
== Notes ==
Category:Songs
Category:1980s
Category:American music
pl:Billie Jean
pt:Billie Jean