nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Haribo Gummy Candy, Sugarless Gummy Bears, 5-Pound Bag

Haribo sugarless gummy bears seem like your everyday gummy bear, but in reality they're just Satan's cum condensed. In fact, in NO situation should you eat this evil of a candy unless you want to torture yourself with a gastrointestinal distress like nothing you have ever experienced, even worse than eating raw oysters from the Victoria harbor. Why you would watch zombie movies while you CAN become a zombie yourself?
==Symptoms==
The candy does not taste bad, at least it does taste like a typical gummy bear. However, after eating a couple dozen (you will, just like most candies), all hell breaks loose. The first symptoms are cramps in the stomach which feel like getting hit by a gigantic multi-hit shockwave that kills you instantly, then Satan and his legion of demons will set up camp in your digestive tract and you will start farting like the demon's trumpet and the smell of your farts will be the smell of 66666 pairs of rotten teeth trying to sing Beethoven's symphonies. After about 5 minutes Satan will start his infiltration into your digestive tract and you will start to have blast diarrhea that is comparable to a rocket setting off from a launch station, combined with the looks of watery beef soup mixed with 3 cups of sawdust and the smell of the flesh of somebody that has taken krokodil for 4 years, each day nonstop. Then you will stay in the toilet succumbing to Satan's attack on your digestive tract for 3 to 4 hours and the diarrhea will blast from your anus like Niagara Falls and be hot like molten chocolate. You will also start wiping your anus until it's hot and red and you will struggle between sleeping in the toilet and farting because the diarrhea will drain all your energy and sanity away. Your legs will have cramps because you sit in the toilet so long as well. When you get out the toilet, you will become insane after seeing images of gigantic swarms of diarrhea-inducing gummy bears trying to stuff your anus just like the worst hentai from Pixiv.
Seriously. What you saw above this line was all true. So are the things below this line.
==How can you use these gummy bears to your own profit==
*Send it to your office as a cruel joke. Make sure you DO NOT eat them. When about 5 to 6 of your enemies eat them, lulz ensues and you can sit behind the scenes as diarrhea fireworks play.
*Use them to feed random dogs. when dogs eat them, they shit bricks. Especially when encountering a stray Rottweiler who is guaranteed to give you rabies. 
*Feed it to the zombies so they will fart and die. This is an excellent weapon against zombies as they will still eat it anyway. 
*Turn it into a DeviantART or Pixiv fetish. (The latter is not recommended unless you are Japanese.)
==See also==
*Diarrhea
*Insane
*Taco Bell
*Food poisoning
Category:Things that are definitely out to get you
Category:Stuff you probably should eat
Category:Tasteless
Category:Dangerous
Category:Poop Cuisine
Category:Toilets
Category:Things That Are Not Hot
Category:Really Long Titles
Harold Flashman

Harold Flashman is one of Britain's best-known and most loved comedians. Born in Streatham, London on April 17, 1923, he developed an early childhood fondness for parody and mimicry. In 1960, when he was 18, he produced his own burlesque newspaper which was reminiscent of The Daily Mail, a populist newspaper published in London.
Harold progressed through to university, getting a BA (Hons) 2:1 in Media Studies with a special cum laude for his thesis. It was titled Because It Says So in My Newspaper and is still a widely used reference for trainee journalists to help then craft articles that appeal to people's emotions rather than their reasoning processes. As the Eighties went on, he became a radio talking head / satirist with brilliant parodies of the ordinary man in the street. His most famous, transmitted on Newcastle's Howay 97.5 station, became legendary when he portrayed a male reasoning-challenged office worker who blamed immigrants for the most improbable things, in this case, the shortage of paperclips at his local Post Office. The given reason being that more immigrants equals more paper clip use.
==Public Reaction==
The following are media testimonials to the brilliance of his work:
==Mental Breakdown and the Seaside Sanatorium==
The pressures of being called Harold Flashman eventually took their toll. It's not clear whether being named after one of literature's footnote-characters or the strain of maintaining a media persona precipitated the mental breakdown, but he spent 4 years recovering at Butlins, a premier private hospital in Bognor Regis.
Since then he has maintained a media presence on BBC's Have Your Say. Sadly, his genius and comedic skills are often overlooked and he is all too often regarded as "just another Daily Mail reader". He is much more than that. As one observer observed in an observational manner:
==Mental Breakdown and the Have Your Say Implosion==
Harold Flashman's feigned breakdown on the Have Your Say site was an intentional break with the site. Having recently started his own business, he found himself unable to stop posting under at least 60 user accounts between the hours of 9AM and 5PM. He engineered his exit in the following way
* by pretending that people have been let off drink-driving in the UK
* by copying and pasting in a potentially true account of a drink-driving death into his posts
* by then claiming this was his mother
* by wishing family members of multiple other users dead (in contravention of the site rules) when they pointed out he was talking rubbish claiming "they mock my grief"
==Bollywood Rumours==
Recent press reports that Harold Flashman has been approached to co-write a Bollywood comedy have not yet been confirmed by any studios. Shilpa Shetty has publicly declared an interest in starring in a Harold Flashman comedy, and Amitabh Bachchan has publicly stated he will not, under any circumstances, be involved with a Harold Flashman project. He stated "Under no circumstances will I work with this grotty little man! He's really got my gander up."
Category:LameCategory:Leon Trotsky FansCategory:Loonies
Harpo Marx

What can be said about Harpo Marx except nothing at all. I'm sure he would appreciate this gesture.
So instead here is a picture of a larch.
==Trivia==
*According to family and friends, he often sent telegrams on occasion that kept with his rude persona on screen. They reportedly read, "FUCK OFF, DIPSHIT!!! - HARPO". These even continued after his gruesome death.
*Later in life, Marx became an in-demand after-dinner speaker. Though he was a talented orator, he would get his biggest laugh at the start of his speech by getting his penis caught in a waitress.
*Unlike his brother Chico, Harpo could only play two songs on the piano, Waltz Me Around My Willy and Godflesh's Circle Of Shit. Despite this small repertoire, he actually was hired to play the piano to accompany silent movies, adapting the two songs in different tempos to the action on the screen. He thought this was big and clever until he was beaten up by one cinema owner.
*In his will, he donated his trademark kazoo to the nation of Pakistan, who then mistakenly ate it
*Harpo Marx's production company is called Oprah.
*Harpo was the world champion kazoo player in 1947. In 1949 while performing to an adoring crowd,the crowd began to levitate and then he spontaneously combusted.
== Family ==
Harpo has four brothers, Groucho Marx, Chico Marx, Zeppo Marx and Karl "Pinko" Marx.
Harpo is cousins with George W. Bush and often helps him out on making decisions that affect the US and the world.
Category:American actors
Category:American comedians
Category:Vaudeville performers
Harry Connick, Jr.

Harry Connick Medium was born sometime in the hippie era. When he was 3 years old, he found superglue in the kitchen cabinet of his parents, and glued himself stuck. They couldn't get him loose for about 5 hours, at which point young Harry had found a fascination for the piano. This was the first introduction to the world of music.
He was taught early on to wear outfits such as loose suits, and big hairstyles. Harry met his wife while he was shopping for underwear for himself in a Victoria's Secret store. 
He has been compared to several artists over the years, but he has never been compared to Frank Sinatra. Most commonly people associate him with musician 50 Cent and Gene Simmons.
Harry was cast as one of the lead characters in a William Friedkin film called Insect. His co star Ashely Judd frenched a tarantula, and the French actor Michael Shannon.
Recently he was acting in a show called "Sexy PJs", where he was flexing his abs. Harry was featured on posters in his PJs everywhere. Women in New York would drive off the road while they were busy staring at his chest.
As the first man to have shared a bed with both Will and Grace at the same time, he became a pioneer in the trade of ménage à trois. This was frouned upon by neighbours.
He invented velcro. And is known to wear black tights at his concerts. Even today, this is considered to be rude in some cultures.
In December 2009 he appeared on the Australian variety show Hey Hey Its Saturday which was shown on a Wednesday night. In this particular show he became offended when an act he was judging appeared with blacked out faces and mocked the Jackson Five. They were known as the Jackson Jive and featured Michael Jackson with a white face. He later said, "if this was shown in America, it wouldn't be called Hey Hey Its Saturday. It'd be Hey Hey You're Off the Air" and gave the act a Zero.
After being approached by Harry about his disgust citing that Americans frown upon blacks being portrayed as "buffoons" in the media, Daryl Somers, the host of the show later apologised on the air for allowing white men to appear in black face. This has been seen as hypocriticle considering in the movie Tropic Thunder, Robert Downey Junior, paints his face black and plays a Black American. A film made by Americans, with Americans, for Americans. Harry Connick is a fuckhead.
Category:American actors
Category:American musicians
Category:Gangsta Rappers
Category:Pop musicians
Haters

Many people use the term "hater" to describe someone who hates them, e.g. "That person just called me a hater. He is a hater. I hate him." Using my perceptive power of genius-like reasoning, I have decided that a hater is someone who hates.
==What are the people who call people haters?==
Well, presumably, people who call people haters are lovers, e.g. "I called you a hater for calling me a hater and I didn't want to be the derogatory thing I had just called you so I declared myself the opposite of a hater and since the opposite of hate is love that makes me a lover but you thought the exact same thing as I did so you too declared yourself a lover and that made us both lovers and if two people are lovers they love each other so by logic I had to either declare my love for you or look incredibly gay and then of course so did you so we both professed our love for each other and then the hangover started." Is that right?
No. I thought so too at first, but then I realized we were just beating the shit out of each other like we were just before I called you a hater.
Yeah. Fuckin' hater.
==Isn't it sort of hypocritical to call someone a hater, then?==
Not if you love them.
==Huh?==
Someday you too will be faced with with the agony of wanting to enlighten a misguided soul's life with peace and love and kindness who refuses to... Yes, yes I am. ... Oh c'mon, it's not like I can help it. ... Well why don't you try it once a month, huh hater? God, I hate you.
Category:Things That Suck
gl:Hater
pt:Hater
Hatorade

Hatorade (sometimes spelled Hate-o-Rade) is a refeshing sports beverage that many "fools" drink whilst "playa hatin'" (thus the origin of the name). It was originally released for public consumption in 1992, although the creator of the drink has been disputed. It is for sale in 49 states (sorry Tennessee!).
==Ingredients==
Hatorade consists of the following ingredients:
*20% smack-talking (usually with the inability to back it up).
*30% playa hatin' (attempts at creating a formula in which the game, and not the playa, is being hated has so far proven unsuccessful)
*40% mass marketing to a predominately white market.
*10% water
==Backlash==
Many figures in popular culture, from rap music to movies to professional wrestling have discouraged the use of Hatorade amongst their peers. Personalities will usually ask why their aquaitance is drinking "that Hatorade", or will simply flat out accuse them of doing such. Most individuals will simply ignore such comments, or will either reply that they are simply "keeping it real" or attempting to "rehydrate themselves in order to replenish lost fluids and electrolytes" after performing exhausting athletic activities, such as basketball or curling.
Category:Articles that make me thirsty 
==Abuse and Treatment==
Consumption of hatorade in moderate amounts is reasonable, even healthy. However, abuse can be common. Symptoms of Hatorade abuse include fronting, starting drama, and just not giving a fuck. If you or anyone you know has a problem with Hatorade, please call Snoop Dogg immediately. He'll know what to do.
==Instructions==
 1.remove cap
 2.splash in enemy(friend)'s face or any other area
 3.(optional) throw bottle at groin (face if female)
Hatstand

A hatstand is a completely insane piece of furniture upon which a hat is carefully stored to maintain its shape, or upon which a hat is hung when entering a house.
==Sticks with hooks: insane!==
thumb|left|150px|Zany!
Hatstands are absolutely bonkers. They are simply placed there in the entry hall, or upon the credenza or dresser, for people to carefully store their hats. This is nuts!
Many people remain incredulous at the sheer craziness of these sticks with hooks, but make no mistake about it. They are real, and they are completely out of their minds.
==Types of Hatstands==
There are many different kinds of hatstand, each one more looney than the last.
===Dressertop===
The dressertop hatstand is used to keep a hat shapely and in good repair while it is not being sported about town. This is as daft as all get out.
This type of stand is so out-there, in fact, that it may merely contain a single knob or bulb upon which one hat is stored, or it may have several hooks radiating from center, allowing storage of several headdresses as needed. Now that is preposterous!
===Hall stand===
An entry hall stand is tall, often man-height, and may serve double duty as a coat rack as well. This type is intended for temporary stowage of head adornment for arriving guests. Can you imagine the sheer lunacy?
==Hatstand history==
Through the ages, the zaniness of the hatstand has been a constant, especially in more culturally refined environs.
Very early hatstands were no less deranged than those of today. The ancients, for whom hats, which they called crowns, were the exclusive articles of kings and queens, carved their hatstands out of ivory. This could not have been more batty.
As hats became more and more the property of the genteel if common man, the need to hang the hat rather than toss it on the divan brought the hatstand into common use. Which, of course, was nuts.
Hatstands from the early days were made of wood. The quality of the hatstand was usually a direct result of the quality of the wood used. Mahogany, oak and cedar hatstands offered the highest quality, while less expensive yet still functional models were constructed of pine.
In the early 20th century, the wire-frame hatstand was introduced, adding a completely wacky twist to the hatstand legacy. Modern hatstands run the gamut of materials and shapes, from glass and stainless steel to even more bizarre stuff like plastic and dense foam.
Whatever the future holds for the hatstand, one can be certain it will always be completely... 
==Hatstand==
Berserk.
Category:Insane
Hattrick

Hattrick is a sport in which teams try to score points by throwing their hats as high as possible. Since its invention in 1981, it has developed to become the national sport of Scandinavia (Sweden in official matches). Hattrick eventually became a professional sport in 2036 despite being a Scandinavian sport. It quickly spread internationally and outstanding players (Divine Players in official matches) and teams are found today all over the rest of the earth. 
== How to Play ==
To play hattrick, each team of 4-9 players (8 in official matches) must have 4-9 (8 in official matches) of the following items:
* 3 colored and numbered Hats (4 in official matches)
* 1 colored Uniform
Games are played with 2-8 (4 in official matches) teams. Each player must be wearing the hat they are going to throw before they throw it. When the whistle/horn/gong/whatever (Gun in official matches) makes a sound, each player throws their hats one at a time into the air and the height it reaches is recorded. the team whose last hat lands last is eliminated. then the score is worked out by dividing the height the hat flew by the height of the hat for sanity reasons. the team with the most points wins.
== International ==
Hattrick was introduced into the 2052 Summer Sporting Championships but was taken off the list of events in 2076 due to the dominance of George Carey. His team (England in official matches) won every gold medal during 2064-2072. Rumor has it that it will be put on the list again next year because George Carey died in 2081.
Hattrick was introduced into the U-20 Summer Sporting Championships in 2060 after a request from Bob Sunesson and has been a part of it since. The latest winner was obviously Scandinavia (Sweden in official matches). Hattrick has also been exhibitioned at the Football World Cup in 2026 and 2042 and will most likely be exhibitioned again in 8 years time.
Since then, Hattrick has been played in many countries, and national leagues have been formed in the continents of Scandinavia (Sweden in official matches), Europe, South America and smaller ones elsewhere.
== Variants ==
Many leagues decide not to eliminate the team whose last hat fell last, while others changed the formula for scoring to be more fair on bigger hats or the reverse, if you want to join a Hattrick league, please consult the league manager (Owner in official leagues) for more information.
== Notable Hattrick Players ==
This is a list of notable hattrick players.
=== Professional Players ===
*George Carey 
*Bob Sunesson (Bob in official matches)
*Craig Wozniak
*Klas Løvelund
*Herman Vooijs
No women who play Hattrick are notable enough to be on this list.
== External links ==
*Company Responsible for Records 
*Official Fansite with Leagues
*Unofficial Fansite (NSFW game pictures)
Category:Sports
it:hattrick
Haute couture

Haute couture (Spanish for 'half-assed sewing') is a common term for trendy fashion worn in mobile home parks throughout the United States. Originating in Tucson, Arizona, Haute couture has been sampled shamelessly in fashion hot spots around the world like:
* Paducah, Kentuckistan
* Kabul, Afghanistan
* Warsaw, Poland 
* Alexandria, Virginia
Traditionally, Haute couture was only used to refer to fashion worn by pampered psychotic pop stars, rich and greedy divorcees and over-sexed pseudo-talent show judges, like Britney Spears, Ivana Trump and Paula Abdul. It is believed that haute is a corruption of the word hawt as spoken by Paris Hilton. More recently, the term means any embarrassing combination of clothing worn by parents or grandparents when they retrieve their teenage children or grandchildren at school. Haute couture can be recognized by the screaming accusation of a 15-year-old high school student, as in "I can't believe you picked me up at school wearing that!" 
==Variations on the Theme==
* Tucson Casual is another way of saying Haute couture. 
==Fashion Show==
A crowd of nationally known celebrities and fashionistas attended the Last Annual Haute Couture Fashion Show, held in Tucson, Arizona this past spring. Cutting-edge designers debuted their one-of-a-kind looks.
* The Nutty Professor: Baggy Bermuda shorts held up by clashing suspenders—don't forget the high-riding waist—accessorized with white knee-high socks and sandals. It's a fusion of outdated fashion and personal flair that only octogenarians can manage.
* Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer: Two-piece polyester pantsuit in any washed-out pastel color. The faux pocket look, by way of multiple flaps, emphasizes a certain non-functional sensibility. Designed as one piece, the jacket/blouse combo transforms that dated layered look into a look of desperation, particularly during the summer months.
* Retail Store Owner: Ugly Hawaiian shirts, pulled over a pot belly...what more is there to say?
Category:Fashion
Having a number one

Having a number one is a saying. What it says? "Having a number one". Note: not to be confused with having a number run, which often means running the numberbet race, which is still ran once a year by everybody still learning their numbers.
==Meaning==
There are mixed thoughts on what it means, but sadly the dominant choice ("I need a wee") is almost supported by the whole world. However, fortunately, everybody knows it actually means that you want to piss all over the back of the toilet seat, and blame ME on it, at the same time. What a shame.
==History==
One apon a time, a dude from another reality stole the infinity stones from Thanos! Afterward, Thanos needed a wee really bad! He told his followers that he needed a number one - since dicks look like a one - and thus the saying was created. It may interest you to know that Thanos is at least the size of a banana. Or larger. Something like that.
Now, how it reached Humans, nobody knows, but Thanos now wants to wipe out half of the universe's life as revenge for Humans and bananas stealing his copyright.
However, if thanos succeeds, the universe will be torn apart, lacking its life-force, and meet a fate darker than thanos...
By the way (btw), Thanos's dick is about the size of a banana. Also, ban-an-a-ing created this also. Humans would get a ban-an-anus and pee and crap all over it. One point for wee, two points for taking taking a crap that I exist, 3 for actually crapping on a banana. 4 for actually eating it. 5 if you crap/wee all over it and then eat it! Banan-anus's are disgusting. But winning is just as important as mearly existing. Which is to say, not a lot, but to us, very important. The competition is said to be the meaning of life!
==Why use it?==
What a silly question. Why not!? The saying is essentialy the meaning of life. of life. of life. Essentially.
==See also==
*Number One
*Pee
*Bananas
*Dicks
Category:The meaning of life