Daniel Brandt (video game)

Daniel Brandt: The Video Game was released by Non-tendo™ Advanced Gaming Systems in December 2005. It immediately swept the gaming world with its non-stop flamewarring action, fantastically realistic system-gaming gameplay, and nearly incomprehensible backstory. It is believed that Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer is addicted to the game, and spends several hours a day completely engrossed in it, as well as several hours a day just being completely gross. (Why this is significant, no one can say.)
==June 2005==
*Welcome to Daniel Brandt: The Video Game*
*bchase has entered the game*
*teamwik has entered the game*
bchase: rdy?
*teamwik has left the game*
bchase: sweet
bchase: nobody cares lol
*bchase edits John Seigenthaler Sr.!!!*
bchase: PWNED
*teamwik has entered the game*
teamwik: wtf?
bchase: don't mind me
bchase: oops, musta thought it was uncyc :^P (wink wink)
teamwik: kthx
bchase: cya
teamwik: got anyone to BANZORZ?!?!?
*bchase has left the game*
==November 2005==
*sgnthaler has entered the game*
teamwik: yo d00d
sgnthaler: wtf?
teamwik: what's yer problem
sgnthaler: yer article about me is full of s**t is my problem
teamwik: lol so fix it d00d
sgnthaler: f**k that
sgnthaler: i'm callin' my lawyer
teamwik: WP:NLT, d00d
teamwik: BANZORZED!!!1!1Eleven!!
*sgnthaler has left the game*
*jimbo has entered the game*
jimbo: wassup
teamwik: nuthin'
teamwik: d00d was being a d1kkk, BANZORZED!!!
jimbo: who?
teamwik: sgnthaler
*jimbo FREAKZOUTZORZ!!!*
teamwik: zomgwtf?
jimbo: you f****d up
teamwik: oh s**t
teamwik: uh sorry
*jimbo edits John Seigenthaler Sr.!!!*
jimbo: I'm wondering, what would happen if we just don't say anything about this?
jimbo: maybe the liberal media conspiracy won't find out
jimbo: we'll just say we got no way to tell who did it
teamwik: kewl
*jimbo has left the game*
==December 2005==
*dbrandt has entered the game*
teamwik: hey
dbrandt: uh check this out
*dbrandt ID'z bchase!!!*
*dbrandt nukes teamwik!!!*
*2000 points damage to teamwik!!!*
dbrandt: PWNED
teamwik: omgwtf!!!!!
teamwik: uh, not our fault tho
teamwik: stpd-fk thought it was uncyc right?
teamwik: that makes it ok right?
teamwik: right...?
*bchase apologizes to sgnthaler!!!*
*bchase PWNED!!!*
*bchase is out of the game!!!*
dbrandt: cya
*dbrandt has left the game*
teamwik: s**t we're scr00d
teamwik: this sucks
teamwik: WE WILL HAVE REVENGEZORZ!!!1!11!
*teamwik edits Daniel Brandt!!!*
*4 points damage to dbrandt!!!*
teamwik: PWNED!!!!!!
*dbrandt has entered the game*
dbrandt: wtf?
teamwik: PWNAGE
*teamwik_lxbeak AFD's Daniel Brandt!!!*
teamwik: DENIED
==January 2006==
*dbrandt AFD's Daniel Brandt!!!*
teamwik: DENIED
==February 2006==
*teamwik_tbeatty AFD's Daniel Brandt!!!*
teamwik: DENIED DENIED DENIED
teamwik: sorry dbrandt YOU ARE "NOTABLE"
teamwik: even though nobody knows who the f**k you are, lol
dbrandt: ok fkrs have it your way
dbrandt: btw yer all breakin' the new USA cyberstalker law
teamwik: WP:NLT, d00d
teamwik: BANZORZED!!1!!!1!ELEVEN!
*dbrandt has left the game*
teamwik: YAY! WE WIN!!! GO TEAMWIK! LOLERZ!
teamwik: BWUHAHAHAHA we'll never hear from that TROLL again lol
teamwik: kewl
*dbrandt ID'z teamwik!!!*
*500 points damage to teamwik!!!*
teamwik: wtf? OH NOES!
*teamwik FREAKZOUTZORZ!!!*
teamwik: but he was BANZORZED??!?!?? how can this be?
*teamwik is now known as "hive"*
hive: omgwtf?!?!?
hive: uh, can we set the name back to what it was?
hive: no?
hive: fkn s**t
==March/April 2006==
*dbrandt offers DEAL to hive*
hive: no deals with terrorists stalkers crackpots TROLLS
*hive rejects DEAL*
hive: TROLLS TROLLS TROLLS TROLLS TROLLZZZZZZES
*hive_lxbeak has entered the game*
lxbeak: Uh, can't we all just get along? :^)
*hive nukes hive_lxbeak!!!*
*100 points damage to hive_lxbeak!!!*
lxbeak: Come on, guys, was that really necessary? :^)
lxbeak: After all, I have SOOPER BOOROCRAT POWARZ. :^)
hive: no deals
hive: no negotiations
hive: no more mister nice guy
lxbeak: Fine. I'll just be on my merry way, then. :^)
lxbeak: Have a nice day! :^)
*hive_lxbeak has left the game*
hive: wuss
hive: what more can dbrandt do now anyway lol
==May 2006==
*dbrandt ID'z hive_anti-scientologist_kabaaaal!!!*
*dbrandt ID'z hive_genderbenders!!!*
*dbrandt ID'z hive_kfan!!!*
*hive_kfan PWNED!!!*
*1000 points damage to hive_kfan!!!*
*hive_kfan resigns from hive!!!*
*1000 points damage to hive!!!*
*hive_slimmy resigns from hive!!!*
*74 points restored to hive!!!*
hive: ok uh maybe there was more he could do
*hive ULTRASUPERMEGAFREAKZOUTZORZ!!!*
hive: now we're RLY pissed off
hive: let's get jimbo
hive: hey jimbo
hive: uh, jimbo?
hive: hello?
*hive_slimmy returns to hive!!!*
*1326 points damage to hive!!!*
==June 2006==
*hive OPBANZORZED hive_NSLE!!!111
*2000 points damage to hive_NSLE!!!*
hive: either you are with us or against us, no deals with TROLLS
*hive_NSLE PWNED!!!*
*hive_NSLE resigns from hive!!!*
hive: loser
hive: hey i know let's just ignore dbrandt from now on
hive: cool
==July 2006==
hive: hey this IGNORE ALL TROLLSES policy seems to be working
hive: outings and troll-board postings are down 40 percent from last month
*Ken Lay DEATHZORZ!!!*
*Concerned citizens edit Ken Lay!!!*
*Reuters pwns Wikipedia!!!*
*15 points damage to hive!!!*
hive: hey now that was just uncalled for
hive: i mean it only said he'd committed suicide for like two f***ing minutes
hive: everybody hates us
*jimbo has entered the game*
jimbo: wassup
hive: usual bs
jimbo: y'know, lately i've been thinking...
hive: uh-oh
jimbo: what if we tried to be more, you know, humane?
jimbo: like, maybe we should be more concerned about human dignity?
jimbo: even if that meant we were, you know, less inclusionary?
hive: uh, okay
hive: we'll get right on it
jimbo: kthxbye
*jimbo has left the game*
*angela has entered the game*
angela: Hey this article about me sux
hive: omg! it must be deleted at once! WE SHALL BROOK NO DELAYZORZ!
angela: k - cya
*angela has left the game*
hive: sure is dull around here now that we're not troll-baiting so much anymore
hive: Zzzzzzzz
hive: um...anybody know what the score is now?
hive: we're still winning right?
hive: right...?
----
To be continued
==See also==
* The Endless Game of Tit-for-Tat
* Daniel Brandt (disambiguation)
Category:War Games
Category:Wikipedia