Hatena Hellku

I was an intern at Hatena---um... *cough* excuuuuuuse me, princess-I mean... I WORKED... I WORKED for Hatena. did I get it right? Yes? ok.
So um... uh.... I forgot what I was gonna say! uh... oh! now I know! So, yah, I worked their and stuff, and I was a moderato-I mean an admi-I mean I was Notch-I mean... AH FORGET IT! I bet you don't want to here this story, with really good grammar and spelling, right? I get confused when I get things riGHT, BUTT WEN I SPEEK LEIK DIZ, I IZ OKAEEEEE!!!!!!!1!!!11! It's like, I have a problem, or something... You know what? To get things off my head, I'm gonna speak trollpastish now.
SO YA, I WORKD DER END STUF, UNTEEL A SKELETON POPPED OU- fine, I'll speak right.
So, I was working on it's website, including Hatena Haiku, until there was this guy who posted something, it was a link. It led to hell.hatena.com. He said that the website was called Hatena Hell (aka Hatena Hellku for Hatena users), a website like Hatena Haiku, except there are creepy people typing and stuff. Like Smile Dog, Jeff, Bad Santa... wait a minute... BAD SANTA?
There's no such thing as Santa! BAD SANTA doesn't exist either! More like SANTIC SANTA! lUl.
So, curiosity kicked my ass and made me click on the link. The logo said "Hatena Hell," just like the title. I saw some posts like "I JUST GOT A HAIRCUT TODAY!" from Jeff, and "I WENT TO THE GROOMERS AND IT SUCKED!" from Smile Dog. There were all demonish posts of people and scary myths and urban legends, like no one ever saw before. Heck, even the Slavemaster was there! (If you don't know who the Slavemaster is, type it up you dumbasses.) I even saw sublimental messages, like 666 numbers, and really bad pictures! (wat.)
Then, I saw a post that came from Evil Patrick, (I would've called him EVIL PATRIXXX, but due to the good grammar and spelling of this article (well most of it), I won't say his actual name for the rest of this parenthesis quote. Sorry EVIL PATRIXXX.) and he said "Jack, I know you're here." (my actual name is Jack, though) "Please talk or die." I had to do something... so I replied.
"What do you want from me?"
"Your soul."
"Wait, doesn't the villager take my soul?"
"What villager?"
"From Animal Crossing!"
"Animal Crossing's overrated."
"You're overrated."
"What? Excuse me? Actually, I am kind of overrated, of course."
"Wow, I was right all this time."
"Not really."
"Why?"
"Because you're going to die now. >XD"
"Impossible."
"i did it for the lulz i did it for the lulz i did it for the lulz"
Smiley then came up, and tried to get me. I ran as fast as I can... and kept hiding. Here I am, typing this story up in an overrated crappy useless wiki that doesn't make sense. Oh well, at least no one is here to get me now90wa74tv5no9sgct8ysegrft8ogysehoiyugom08w4ysdforvgmhtf89feg08ehrheufy1@%^83672q5849e269348615
AARON IS GOD OF HATENA
ALL RISE TO GOD OF HATENA
AND EVIL PATRIXXX, THE RULER OF HELL.
TO THE GODS OF TROLLPASTA.
TO THE GODS OF EVERYONE
PLEASE OBEY NOW OR PLEASE DIE TRYING
OBEY NOW OR DIE TRYING
OBEY OR DIE 
OBEY
ha ha, I lied about not spelling EVIL PATRIXXX right >:D
Category:Trollpasta
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:I WAS AN INTERN AT
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck