nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
An Affront to God

The blister of cold swept through the home on this Friday evening. As I hear the door slam I look up from the piano. "Its only 10...", I say out loud to myself. "David! David where are you?!". I hear my master bark. His voice already liquored up from his night on the town with another one of his "girls" as he calls them. "David! David we - oh." He states as he turns into the living room. I'm sitting at my Steinway, fingering the Ivory when he brings in his tracks of dirt and ice on my clean redwood floors. "How dare she David!" He looked down his crooked nose bent upward, sneering at the world as if it owed him more than he has stolen from it already. "How dare she!" He storms over and nearly pushes me off my seat at the piano as he sits himself next to me. He begins to plink at my piano's ivory leaving cold on it as he drips onto my seat. "Do what sir?". He turned to me, anger in his green eyes as if I should know his mind right away. "How dare she insult my image of god!" He got up throwing more snow onto my piano. I gave him a cold stare as his back was turned.
"She thought she could insult me? Allen Scott?! I saved her wretched company and this is the thanks I get?!" He stumbled over a little end table and began to remove his boisterous overcoat. A gaudy dark green pea coat I bought him in January of last year. Or rather he told me to buy him, from my own account. He pays me well so I cannot argue. "The night was a disaster! I bring her to La'Grange and we have a seafood dinner inside, they said the patio is closed in the winter, I mean what idiot closes a patio ever? I rented out the whole restaurant just so we would be served immediately but it still takes them an hour to make our food. Then that's when it happens. I notice her little... changes. She eats with her right hand but drinks with it as well. She only talks in fragments no coherent thought between them. Then she has the audacity at the end to request a kiss from me? I used to think she was the image of god, her pale skin, her red lips, her yellow eyes. But no! She has the speak of a commoner! No upper class to her! What is the point of a god that is flawed? What god is there then? Is god not to be perfect? Well David? Well!?" I sat at my piano trying to keep a look of interest on my face, he does this almost every week. "Very true sir, very true." He began to walk up the stairs to the attic. "Go fetch her from the car. Not a perfect sacrifice but business needs one none the less!"
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Beings
Category:Rituwel
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
An Anorexic Alliance

Scarlett was in the hallway at school, being teased by some boys as always, "Hey, Scar! Why don't you eat some more so you're not just skin and bones? Ha ha!" and Scarlett, for the first time, defended herself, "I may be thin, but you're more overweighted than anyone else I've seen!" the boys who were teasing her looked ashamed, as it was true. They were heavily overweight. "But, I-" one of them said, and they all left. Scarlett felt proud of herself, and went into her math class.
After she got home, she ate a scrap of a taco, and said to her mom, "I finally defended myself against those overweight boys who were jerks to me." "Well, I'm very proud of you, Scarlett!" replied her mom, "But you really should get over your anorexic problems. It can kill you." Scarlett replied, "Okay, mom. I'll try." Scarlett then went into her room, turned on her computer, and listened to her music. Scarlett was only slightly underweight, as she has mostly overcome her anorexia. She looked out her window, and saw a flash of a tall, pale, faceless, thin man, wearing a jet black suit and a blood red tie. The man was just as thin as her. Scarlett recognized this man as the Slender Man. She has heard many rumors about him. She did not scream, as she felt an urge to go to this man. She turned off her computer, went out of her room, and told her mom, "I'm going for a walk outside, I'll be back." "Okay, be back at 8:00." replied her mom, and Scarlett set off to find the Slender Man.
About 15 minutes later, she saw Slender Man only 10 feet away, and she ran towards him. When she got in front of him, Scarlett said, "Slendy! Thank god you're here!" Slender replied, "How are you not afraid of me? Why are you just as thin as me?" "Why would I be afraid of you? You're awesome! Also, I have anorexia, that's why I'm thin." Scarlett replied, and thought for a moment. She then said, "Say, you're as thin as me! How about we ally with each other and I become one of your proxies? Deal?" Slender thought for a moment, and replied, "Deal." they shook hands, and Scarlett felt herself transform. Her blonde hair became redder than blood, her pale green eyes turned into a piercing blue, and her skin becoming paler. She saw herself wearing a black jumpsuit, and said to Slender, "Thank you. I will always be your most loyal proxy." "You're welcome, my dear Scarlett." replied Slender, and Scarlett started running towards the middle of the woods.
The End.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Bad Fanfiction
Category:PROOF DAT SLENDURMAN EXUSTS
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Well, that was pointless.
An Anticlimactic Story

One day, while playing my N64, I felt the sudden urge to play Super Mario World, so I decided to grab the cartridge from my shelf of games, and plop it into the system.
It started up fairly normal, with the exception that the music was slightly lower pitched. I then decided to start a new game, and already it started to look strange.
The water was green, and the trees were completely gone. The ground also oozed a strange, red substance that can only be assumed to be lava.
I started the first level, preparing myself for whatever I would have to face in this journey of mine.
The level started in a toxic powerplant, of all things. The monsters in there looked horribly deformed, and made noises even the bravest of souls would fe-
... Wait, what?
My system crashed right then and there, and it actually started to smoke.
"SHIT!" I said, running into the kitchen to grab my fire extinguisher and putting it out.
I looked at the system, seeing if it could be salvaged. Unfortunately, it was damaged beyond repair, both due to the fire and my frenzied panic.
"Y'know, what?" I said, having enough at this point.
"Fuck this."
I then proceeded to glitch out of existence, leaving nothing behind.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Im died
Category:Mario
Category:Shortpasta
An Average Day in the Life of Skepolo

>be australian
>pay $600000000 AUD ($0.50 USD) a month for 56kbps internet
>go over data cap while loading a paragraph of text
>no cell phone service in the outback, have to drive the ute into town and renew data plan
>drive for 3 days
>pay $20 a litre for petrol along the way
>drive for 3 more days
>finally get to the ISP offices
>talk to the shelia receptionist
>trip over
>drop pocket knife
>cunt behind me says "you call that a knife?"
>starts laughing and pulls out his own knife
>"this is a knife"
>sheila starts laughing
>everybody in the building starts laughing
>cunts on the sidewalk start laughing
>pick up can of fosters
>walk out the building
>get killed by drop bear
Crikey
Category:Inside Jokes
Category:Memes
Category:Im died
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
An Edgy Story

Chapter 0I woke up this morning. I felt like shit. I looked at an image of my enemy, whose name is Furbearingbrick. He deleted my all-caps, Pokemon and SCP crossover pasta. He sucks. I wake up every morning by shooting at the image of Furbearing brick with my laser pistol. Bam. Today I hit it right in between the eyes.
Chapter 2That is my special superpower. I can slow down time to align up shots. I also fly, turn into a demon, and hypnotise people to have sex with me. I also play the melodica. So anyway I went into the living room and oh god it was horrible.
Chapter 3Disembodied faces all over the wall. There was a man in a hoodie who was cutting up family. I tried to stop him and I saw his face... It was so verreh skerreh. I slowed down time and shot up the guy like a dozen times and he died. I ran to my parents and they were dead. I screamed so loud it broke all the windows in the universe because of my super conic scream powers. I had no choice but to get revenge. I looked in the guys coatpocket and found a card for "Evil Thug Incorperated" with an adress so I went there.
Chapter 4I went to the adress and there was a bouncer. Simple to beat. He tried to stop me. I wonder what he would have done if he figured out how strong I was. In fact, I was a member of the Sue Caste, a group of people with exponential powers. Unfortunatly a horrible beast ate them all. It was horrible and I was the only survivor. It was my tragic past. Nobody knows about it to this date, except right now.
Chapter 5Then suddenly I realized the horrible beast was actually the shadow monster from before! Consumed with rage I flung the bouncer back and made him explode with my powers. Stupid bouncer.
Chapter 6Then I ran into the bar, slowed down time, and shot everyone up. Another stupid bouncer tried to grab me from behind but I killed him. Then suddenly a guy in a giant suit ran up and... all I remember is black.
Chapter 7I woke up in a torture chamber. There was a guy about to kill me. He was gonna run a meat shaver under my nuts which don't actually exist because I am too awesome for nuts. So I was about to get killed by the meat shaver after 5 hours of this when I remembered I could turn into a demon! So I did that and broke the restraints and  shoved the guy in the torture chamber and his nuts got shaved off. Then I freed all the other people from the torture chamber including emma watson who I had sex with for the rest of eternity.
Chapter 8
OOC: THIS STORY ISNT DONE. Okay? I just need to take a break because I'm not some kind of fucking gamer who can write a story in one sitting. I will just take a rest for a short while and this story is NOT. DONE. CHECK BACK IN LIKE A MINUTE OR SO AND IT WILL PROBABLY BE DONE. 
ALSO MY CHARACTER WHO IS NAMED EPIC BERT VON MYLAKA THE IIIth IS NOT A MAIRY SUE BECAUSE HE HAS A TRAGIC PAS11111111111111111111
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:TOTALLY NOT UNFINISHED U GUIZE
Category:The Title Is A Lie
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:That just raises more questions!
Category:MARY SUE ALERT
Category:Pages with proper attribution
An Example of a Cliché Creepypasta

Please believe me, this story is true. I wanted to relive the nostalgia of my past, so I decided to go and look for Mega Man 2. I couldn't find the game anywhere. Finally, I went to a yard sale a week later and a middle-aged man gave me Mega Man 2 for free. He said he was a great hacker in his day, and he went crazy one day and hacked the game. By the looks of him, he was pretty crazy. He said I could have the game free of charge. He said he never wanted to see it again. I wondered why he said that, but nonetheless, I got the game.
Lo and behold, I popped the cartridge into the old, dusty NES that I shared my precious memories with. I was in euphoria the moment I pressed the power button and the television blinked on. Everything seemed normal first. Alas, I saw the bosses screen. I flipped out and vomited all over the NES. The bosses were bloody and their hands were covered in bloody blood. I tried to turn the NES off, but it wouldn't turn off.
In the level, it was raining blood. All the enemies were covered in gore and their innerds on a post. I tried to move, but nothing happened. All I could see was bloody blood everywhere and the boss was a blood monster covered in bloody blood and he ate me in the game and ate me in real life. Mega Man and I became bloody blood monsters. When I became human again, I went to the house of the guy who sold me the game.
He was gone and his house was layered in bloody blood particles. I tried to destroy the game multiple times but it kept reappearing. YOU'RE NEXT!!!
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Vidya games
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:Satire
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
An IQ of 415

Good morrow. That is "good morning" in Early Modern English for all you stupid average IQ people and the words "good morrow" evolved into "good morning" over the centuries. Of course, you dumb people with AVERAGE IQ are probably eluded by me and my languagealready. Anywho, I am a man with over 415 IQ. I have not only discovered fusion energy before it was in the news, I have also disproved all of Isaac Newtons laws, as well as Einstein's theory of relativity. My mind is complex, always thinking, always racing around and around like a train. Whenever I look at any problem, my mind always finds a viable solution. I have solutions to all of the worlds problems (such as world hunger, poverty, etc.) and I believe, in a sense, that my intelligence was given as a gift to save the human race. Almost as a Messiah of some sort. Although I am an atheist and have mathematically disproved the existence of god 230 times with different strategies and equations, I believe (to some degree) that I am a higher being in terms of intelligence. Ever since I was 3, I have never enjoyed the mindless banter that us humans (if you can call me human) call "fun," but instead I find amusement in solving larger, more grandiose problems. I am on the brink of solving almost all the secrets of the creation of the universe. For some reason, however, whenever I post my ideas online (mind you, I have already created my own version of the internet), I am ridiculed and mocked by the majority of people. It seems that the world cannot and probably will not humble themselves and pay attention to a genius like me. It seems that you average IQ people will continue to delude yourselves. But that is simply the way of the world, and I have come to peace with that. Sometimes, people cannot accept progress. Do not worry, you will all die before I can help you, and since you average IQ goblins will continue killing each other, then I suppose there is no use for me, or for any other geniuses out there. Instead, you will continue to believe pseudoscientists that say they are smart, such as Einstein, Carl Sagan, and Richard Dawkins. Good day.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Satire
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Shortpasta
An Important Warning

All knives on the planet have been possessed. They're going to try and sneak up behind everyone and stab them to death. However, if you look at them, they'll move back to their original position. If you have any knives nearby, you better watch your back, because the person who was writing this pasta didn't, so we stabbed him to death as he was writing this down.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Shortpasta
An Interesting Epitaph

An interesting epitaph. I wouldn't recommend trying to find it for yourself. The stone to which it belongs has an interesting story.
No one remembers the first name on the stone, but an interesting thing began to be noticed. Visitors to the graveyard when they came to this stone would note a name then read the epitaph. Then were so startled by it that they would note the name again and realize it was their own. Some started to question it with the different cemetery keepers or townspeople.
No one knew what they were talking about. By the next morning all their belongings were there, but they were gone without a trace.
Someone, who knows who, started recording the incidents. They finally decided to cover the stone up to prevent more disappearances, but every time they checked on it, it was uncovered again.
The townspeople just let all visitors know that the cemetery is off limits, but every so often you have someone whose curiosity gets the better of them and they sneak in. The next morning their belongings are found in one of the inns and they are gone.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
An Internet Horror Story

Hello, my name is Beefcake McAssMuffin. Before reading this, I advise you have a parent with you, because this shit is about to get real spoopy.
I was only 9 years old in 2012. I was searching up my favorite internet cancer, like Gangnam Style and Annoying Orange like the little fatass I was, when suddenly, the internet started to slowdown. Pages that loaded in the blink of an eye started to take 12 seconds to load. I was starting to get really scared, when suddenly, I got a message from the toolbar...
"THE INTERNET HAS BEEN DISCONNECTED."
I was hyperventilating at this point. I was a fat, lonely, nerdy little shit who has used the internet in all my free time. I've never seen a message like this! I was on the brink of screaming and crying. "M-Maybe the internet will comeback soon...?" I thought to my self.
10 minutes have passed, it still wasn't back. I was writing all over the walls in my own blud after I cut myself.
20 minutes passed, I was ready to go crazy, I began to bang on the computer. That's when the screen broke. I was on full-on rage. I used the keyboard, which was once my weapon as a Social Justice Warrior, and I slammed it right into the computer! Glass was everywhere...
I haven't said a word for what felt like an hour... I slowly got the courage to get up. I was sobbing, but at the same time... laughing. I began to laugh like a maniac, and after 30 minutes with my handy-dandy stopwatch, my dad walked in on me.
I didn't hesitate, I took the keyboard and murdered my father with it! It felt satisfying! I went to murder my mother next! I laughed like a maniac, and I somehow gained the power to become an invincible superhuman. The FBI came over, and I killed them all! And now... I am going to kill the next person who reads this story.
Your next!!!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:YOU'RE NEXT
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
An Odd Dream I Had When I Was Five

The story starts out on a ship in the middle of the day we were moving along quite well experiancing no real dangers it was a nice ship as well.
I could see the ship through the eyes of who i would believe to be incharge of the food and such. I (I will just say I for the person to save time) was conversing with a creature that looked like charmander from pokemon about how It is going to be made into chips to be eaten it agreed sadly as i walked off to the next of the creatures.
This creature Also was going to be made into food it would be the dips for the chips made from the thing resembaling charmander I would have to guess this was a bulbasoar. It Did not want to be made into a meal for the other patrons so it pleaded with me as i denied it without showing any signs of remorse or sorrow for its life even though it was sentiant and tears were going down its eyes.
Later on I would find myself shearing the flesh from the still living charmander with a razor. There was no blood or gore most likely because I was five at the time and did not even know what it looked like but there were signs of pain and as I carved into its flesh I stil felt no sympathy for the creature begging for me to stop I may have even found it humorus.
I beleive the making of the dip was a repressed memory but I can figure it involved my mashing the other creature into a paste and adding seasoning.
The story would end with Me enjoying the chips and dip not feeling any regret at all.
I believe this was a dream about cannabalism seeing as I was five and my mind would concept the eating of sentiant creatures over humans because I was young but that was probably what the dream was about.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Pokemon
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Dreams
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
An Opportunist

Hi, I don't really feel comfortable telling you my name, so for the purposes of this message, you can call me John. There are a lot of "misinterpretations" about criminals and the like.
For example, you go to any police seminar, you get fed the same bullshit "Criminals are opportunists, they usually strike when it is easiest to do so." They're wrong. Well, in my case they are.
I'm what you call a "Mission Oriented Killer." I only take a life when I believe nothing would have come of it, but we'll get to that later on.
I guess you could call me an old fashioned kinda guy. I believe in simple pleasures; like walks at night, strolling around parks, being social and taking part in town activities, I'm a model citizen, but do you know what one thing annoys me more than anything else in the whole motherfucking world?
People wasting their lives on the computer, kinda like what you're doing now. You see, as I walk along at night, I always take a peak in the windows of some houses (chances are, I've probably been to yours already, you're just lucky at not being on a computer at the time) I stare in the windows, nobody ever spots me. Not until it's too late, anyway.
Over the years, I've gotten better at this. My nightly strolls never fail to find a few people, people who are kinda like you, wasting their lives reading this trivial shit. You should be out, being an active member of your community. I know I am, you probably already know me, anyway.
I'm getting away from the point here, but you see, when you die, what do you think you will be seeing: your grieving family at the end of the hospital bed, the tree you car would crash into, or the inside of your own eyelids as you gently drift away? It would an awful shame if the last thing you saw in your life was my reflection in the computer screen. What I'm trying to say here is, moderate your time on the computer, 'cause you never know when I'm watching, just outside your window. Sweet dreams, I hope I'm not in them.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Old Shit
An Unexpected Presence

I heard it as I strolled through a wood.
Crack.
"Oh, fuck," I gasped, my legs beginning to feel warm.
Reluctantly, I looked down. Dark lines streaked my trousers like rain did windows on a sombre day.
I scoffed.
I'd merely stepped on a twig.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta