nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Bob can't do it

A lot of people might be familiar with the British cartoon known as Bob the Builder. For those who never heard of the show, it is about Bob as he and a bunch of talking machines attempt to fix something. The show aired from 1998 to today. But what has happened to me had made me never watch an episode again.
It was late at night and I couldn't get to sleep so I thought I might stay up all night. So to keep me awake I turned on my old TV and since I did not have cable back then the only cartoons I could watch were on PBS Kids. And they were airing the Teletubbies but it was about to end. Then after a commercial break ended the announcer said that Bob the Builder was on next. I didn't like Bob the Builder as much as I used to but I thought an episode couldn't hurt. The intro played but the thing was Bob, Wendy, and the machines were not there and there was no music. Then the episode "Scoop Saves the Day" began but something was off with the title card. Instead of a small village, there was a military camp instead. The episode began with Bob in a uniform and he was practicing shooting a gun at a target. But when he missed the target Wendy walked to Bob and grabbed him by the shirt and said "You suck!". Bob got angry and dropped the gun and began to punch Wendy. Then after about 30 seconds of punching Wendy says in a muffled voice "Actually, you doing a good job". Then after night to day transition, Bob was at his village but he looked angrier. He began to kick all of the machines and say "Get your lazy bum to work!" and made them stand in a line. He then threw a green object which at first I couldn't make out until I saw it was a grenade. Then the machines began to explode but instead of machine parts flying there was some sort of red liquid (I was stupid enough to not know it was blood). Then Bob said "I would have done the same if I were in Iraq." and then laughs. Then Wendy walks in and screams "Why did you blow up our machines which by the way did nothing bad to you!". Then Bob said "Honestly I could care less about answering the question you asked me." and pulls out a blurred object and a loud bang were heard as it cut to the credits.
At this point, I was both scared and confused at the same time and I called PBS to report the strange episode. Once I told them what happened they said thatana episode being hacked was very rare to happen to the network and it only happened about five times in PBS's whole history. I was glad this was an unofficial episode and I decided to watch more Bob the Builder Bob then come to my house and say IM ABOUT TO KILL YOU then he killed me
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Im died
Category:Not Sure if Troll or Trying to Be Serious
Bob marley in the land of ooo

one time bob marley was a zombie and he fell and fell into a pit and he landed in ooo. then he saw the candy and he was high off his ass so he ate the candy and shit rainbows.
protip: rainbows are an equivilant to rainicorns.
then lady rainicorn came from the sky and started speaking 당신은 왜 이걸 번역 했나. all of a suden finn came lol he came and then bob marley said what the hell and left. then he went to the ice kings place and started shitting everywhere.
the end.
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Dronik Pastas
Category:I CAN HAZ TRANSLATION?
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta
Bob the Farmer

once there was a man named bob he had a wife but no kids he was a nice guy he was never mean but he had a dark side to him in his basement he watched my little pony with a dead cow named sally they were fun people except for when they watched my little pony but one day a tornado came and killed his wife and took away sally so he ran away and never came back and if you see his barn at night you can hear a faint cow moo the end. thank you for reading my story 
Original story: https://weezzzee.deviantart.com/journal/bob-the-farmer-creepypasta-564229809
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Animulz
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:English Class Failure
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:TOTALLY NOT UNFINISHED U GUIZE
Category:That just raises more questions!
Category:Shortpasta
Bob the Killer

i was a big fan of Bob the Builder, but now I fucking HATE THE SHOW NOW! Why? Read more to find out.
one time, I went online stores to find Bob the builder dvds, but found nothing when looking there, I looked on eBay and Amazon and found nothing, nothing fucking at all!
it pissed the shit out of me but I found a dvd called Bob the builder do not watch dvd, I bought it as it cost only one Penny, yup yup, only one Penny.
one weak later it came, I played the dvd and it immediately started with the intro but it had blood everywhere in it, I thought it was a glotch and ignored it, it played the first part where the machines were all talking to each other about a building job about building a building that Bob needs to build, dizzy stated that she was a whiz at building, when Bob came out, he looked really sad and announced to the machines that they were going bankrupt, the machines had the look of sadness on their faces and they began to cry, it sounded so realistic when they cried, after that, Bob went back inside and went from angry to fucking mad, he said "I will fucking kill every single thing on earth, my dream job is now crushed", then he got a RPG and shot it at the machines, who had no time to react and they all exploded.
the episode ended after that and i was so scared I pissed my pants and now it's smells really badly.
shortly after that, I heard on the news that a crazy man was killing lots of people near my neighbourhood, they said that he was a builder who had tons of construction tools and weapons that he was using against the people he was killing, not even the military could kill him, he was just too powerful, he killed nearly entire neighbourhood and every animal in there too.
this sounded bad because I was going down to Poundland that evening to get a pot of Pringles, but I decided to go anyways. when I went down the streets, I saw a builder in front of me, he said "going somewhere Tom?", I was fucking frightened that he knew my name, he then tried to tackle me and I ran away to my home, he then broke the front door and yelled that he was going to kill me, me and my family went to go and hide with each other to avoid getting killed, but the builder found us and he killed my entire fucking family aside from me, he ripped out their skulls, cut off their organs and drilled their private parts, instead of killing me, he just punched me and we had an epic battle that was like a super smash bros battle, I lost though and i was beginning to die, but the last thing I realised before I did die scared so badly I couldnt believe it but it was true, the builder was Bob.
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Trollpasta
Category:WHAT A TWIST!
Category:Excessive Profanity
Category:Pointless Violence
category:BATTELS
Category:Im died
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:That just raises more questions!
Bobby’s World Lost Episode

I'm don't know if you ever heard of Bobby's World. In case you've never heard of Bobby's World, it's an animated show about a 5 year old named Bobby who has a mother named Martha a father named Howard a big sister named Kelly and a big brother named Derek. On June 5th 2018 I went on Prime Video to watch Bobby's World but then I found an episode called Season 1 Episode X. I played the episode. It started off with the regular intro but instead of the regular music there was sad piano music. Then the title card popped up saying Ji Nair ic is Dead. It showed a seen of Bobby crying then it cut to every one crying. Bobby's house exploded and that was it. I was scared to death. 3 weeks later I was stabbed in the heart.
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Stuff Blowing Up
Category:Im died
Category:Shortpasta
Body's

i was walking down the street, minding my business, when a group of people blocked me. apperently there was a murder, and i would be surprised... if it didn't happen yesterday, and the day before, and the day before, and so on and so on.
people were wondering who did it, yet i knew who. i know exactly who kept chocking people by shoving cow udders down their throats, and weed up their nose. yet i can't tell the police. as much as i want to, i can't. no matter what. day after day, i watch them murder their victims, yet i still can't stop them. no matter what.
tonight something strange happen. i woke up, with scratch wounds, yet on the news no new murders. the same thing tomorrow, and tomorrow and- you get it.
today i woke up from sleeping, yet i was outside. i wasn't in bed. i saw something, a murder. i tried to stop things, but there was always some sort of pain. i ended up getting rid of them, but my hands were sliced and diced. same as the rest of me. i opened my back door back to my house. while walking in my blood dripped everywhere from my body onto my floors. i patched my major wounds up, taking a while, took some painkillers, and went to bed. the murderer was finished. they were gone, not dead, but gone. the personality was gone. the murderer personality was gone, not dead though. i was safe. everyone was safe. but someone might fill the space that he filled.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Shortpasta
Boi'd

So today I had to go to goddamn work for no frickin' reason, bro. I'm like, "okay why the hell do I-" and then a DVD appeared out of goddamn nowhere! So, I said, "WHO IS THIS GODDAMN DUMBASS WHO PUT A DVD HERE?!" My Boss saw the DVD and decided to put it in the fricking dumb stupid ass TV! And The Beavis and Butthead Intro started and me and my boss were like, "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" It showed Beavis and Butthead with red ass eyes and blood coming out of their eyes, and they were holding each other's heads and it show a title called, "DEATH IS NEAR!". It showed a scene where Beavis and Butthead blow up someone's house, and Beavis said, "BOIOIOIOING LOLOLOLOLOL." and the man flew to Brazil because of the goddamn explosions that Beavis and Butthead set.
The cops came and said to the boys, "We have some expl-" and then Butthead said, "I like ya cut g" and slapped the crap out of the cop, then the cop did a fricking stunt like Peter Griffin got shot and fell down. Then they start doing a fricking killing spree on Planet Alienopolus and kill all the aliens in a restaurant. 8 astronauts arrived but Beavis and Butthead shoot the fricking astronauts and crap! Stupid dumbasses. Then the episode ended with a title saying, "YOU JUST GOT RICKROLLED!" So, my boss searched up what a rickroll was and it was a prank/troll, then my boss destroyed his desktop and threw it out the window, smashing some a car below.
Someone came in with a knife, going to kill us, and I asked, "Why the hell'd you come in here?" and he said, "Did you enjoy the killer tape?" and I was like, "hell, yeah because expect the intro..." The killer said, "WAIT WHAT THE FU-", one of my co-workers interrupted saying, "LOL GET REKT MR ASS I CHANGED THE TAPE EXPECT THE INTRO!" The killer said, "Well, damn this, you're lucky that I won't kill you because of your stupid co-worker ruining my fricking chance, so I will go kill someone else who watches this cursed episode." Then, he left... So, I thanked my co-worker and got her a new laptop with accessible holders, transformations, and Bluetooth connections to friend devices. She asked, "What's this button?" and pressed it, turning the laptop into a TV. My boss asked if he can use it, but it's my co-worker's, not my boss's. So, I said no. But he decided to invent the same thing I got for my co-worker. And everyone had one and was connected to each other with Bluetooth at work, even me.
Fuck man why did I even write this story? No wonder my wife left me and took the kids
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:English Class Failure
Boiled Sweets

I used to have a little brother.
The only memory I have about him is when I shared with him the boiled sweets I was given for tea.
Even so my brother, who was only one month old when he died, still lives on in our heart.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:That just raises more questions!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
Boku no Nightmare

It was summer vacation and I just had recently gotten a Japanese PS1 at a yard sale. It was being sold at a cheap price. There was also a copy of Boku no Natsuyasumi at the yard sale. Being a big Boku no natsuyasumi fanatic that I was, I asked if that Boku no Natsuyasumi copy was for sale. The guy there said yes. So I checked out of the yard sale and went straight to my house.
When I got home, I got the PS1 set up to play. Then I opened and put Boku no Natsuyasumi into the PS1. The game then loaded up. The game seemed to work perfectly fine until it was august 6th in the game. The morning exercise cutscene loaded and everything looked normal. That was until the breakfast cutscene was over in the game. 
Boku now had bloody red eyes and he looked like he was about to cry. Boku's Aunt, Uncle, and cousins were not anywhere in the house. After I checked the entirety of the house, Boku then looked at me and then said something in Japanese which was written in red text. I was fluent in Japanese so I could understand what he was saying. He was saying "HELP ME. MY SUMMER VACATION IS BEING RUINED BY YOU". I was scared by this and tried to turn the system off but it wouldn't turn off. 
Boku then said, "NOW I'M GONNA RUIN YOUR SUMMER VACATION." He then ran towards the screen and charged at me. I then noticed that he was holding a knife. I then said, "What are you doing with that knife?". He then said in Japanese, "I'M GONNA KILL YOU BECAUSE YOU MADE ME NOT HAVE FUN FOR THE FIRST 5 DAYS OF MY SUMMER VACATION". He then stabbed me in my chest and heart.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Im died
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Boldtext.exe

I accidentally downloaded a virus onto my laptop, HELP!
All I wanted was to get those free smileys from the ad I saw watching anime, and now the text I write is randomly emboldened! The ad took me to a site called smilesfree4u.co. The whole webpage was full of those download buttons, all fitted together like a gallery wall. I wanted my smileys though, so I just hit one of them and the page redirected a few times. I caught one of the urls that flashed past me in the corner of my eye.
milfmania34.co.uk
I should have known my laptop was cooked... 
During those redirects, a file downloaded to my desktop. Then the browser redirected back to what looked the og website, but had a slightly different url, smiles.4u.info. The download buttons were faded out like an ad vignette and there was big blue bolded impact font in size 120 pt font saying "Thank you for download". 
At this point I was a little nervous, but I shook it off. I wanted those smileys, and I've already come so far. 
I minimized my browser, Opera GX themed to look like Internet Explorer, and threw the newly downloaded zip file into a new folder. I figured it have be a bunch of image files that it pulls from when you sent a sticker online, so I put it away so it won't unzip all over my desktop. Now in the folder, I double-clicked smiles4u.zip, opening it in Win-RaR, and proceed to unzip it into the folder. There were only three files; smiley.vst, boldtext.exe and a readme. The first made sense, but what the hell is boldtext? I double-clicked the readme and read it.
I don't know enough about computers to dispute anything said here, so I trusted him.
Both files, into opera, fully restarted. Then my laptop started making airplane noises and almost died. I thought it was over for me, for my laptop. All my files could have been kill. 
It took hours to revive my laptop and eventually it worked, but even before it booted up, I knew something was wrong.
All the text in the boot screen was randomly bolded. And when I went to log in, instead of my name, it said FunnyMan''s pc. On my desktop, all the icons were replaced with fugly 3D smileys, and all the buttons and thumbnails from my browser were also replaced. The yellow demons stared back at me with gleeful malice.
My computer looked ridiculous, and with all the icons changed around, it was nearly unusable.
I was pissed. I remembered seeing a contact link on the first website, so I tried going back, but when I did. The domain was gone. I tried the other one and all that was left was this fucked up image.
Guys, how do I fix my laptop? Is it over for me??
Category:Trollpasta
Category:File Extensions
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Bon Jovi lost album

I was always a huge diehard fan of Bon Jovi, i loved him to death, I would bought every of album from them on vinyl and cd and whenever I would masturbate, i would always scream the lyrics to "it's my life" cuz that really is my life. but now i won't ever listen to them ever again Becuase I discovered an album that made me hate them.
One time, I was looking on my gmail and I found a letter from Bon Jovi thanking me for being a fan and they said they would sented me a new album cd unreleased. i trusted it and told them to ship it. it shipped to me. the cd was completely empty. so was a case, But i still played. the first track sounded normal, well, kind of, it sound like a song that Bon Jovi would make a years prior ago called "always", but it sound depress and sad that it make me cry, it's the saddest song I ever herd and it made me cry even more than yoko ono. second one sounded weird, it was a very creepy song because it was about bon Jovi singing about how he supports satan, im not even a Christian but it still scared the fucking shit out of my god damn ass. third track was even creepier, it involved Bon Jovi crying, but it's was not fake cry, it was real cry, i cry too. fourth track had depressing music that didn't even sound like it was from Bon Jovi themselves and instead sound like a generic horror royalty song from a YouTube song on YouTube video. and it had Bon Jovi crying even more. fifth track, Bon Jovi wasn't crying anymore, instead there was dead silence, until a minit later I flantently herd a whispering saying "help me pleaze I an trapped". the sixth and final track was the scary one of all, it was a whole track involved Bon Jovi making a very very very very very long long long long long long talk, he said "life is a cruel place and I don't not wanna be in it any more, by the next day i will commit a suicide and kill myself so no 1 will ever see mii agian, by by everyone", and then a gunshot was heard and then a giant screamer was heard which made me jumped out the chair and fall on the floor traumertised, and then my CD player died and the cd was found snapped in half when i open CD player.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Music
Category:Rituwel
Category:That just raises more questions!
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
category:Suicide
Category:English Class Failure
Bone Thugs n Harmony stole Chief Keef's Swag and are in the Illuminati aka Bone Thugs n Harmony sucks and you should listen to Chief Keef

Bone Thugs n Harmony are swagger jackers. If you listen to their famous song "Thuggish Ruggish bone" you'll here the famous line "you gotta be down to bang bang". Now everyone knows that Chief Keef is the one who always says bang bang and is the real king of bang bang. BTNH must be really stupid to think we wouldn't notice
Not to mention they also ripped off someone else. Everyone thinks they invented their trademark singing/rapping style but it was actually Nelly and Flo Rida. Serioulsy just listen to hot.
If you want a good song that combines singing with rapping with it not sucking, listen to "First Day Out" by Chief Keef or anything by Future instead.
Not to mention they have two hit songs called Crossbones and Luigi board that are highly satanic. And if you listen to the intro of their first EP reversed it is highly satanic. That proves they are in the Illuminati. Meanwhile, do you see any satanic imagery in the video for i don't like?
Just how do you think they are able to rap that fast without help from demonic beings?
And speaking of rapping fast, that's another thing BTNH ripped off from someone else. There are basically two things they are famous for, the singing/rapping style and speed rapping. But actually they can't even claim credit for the latter. The speed rap style was pioneered by Chris Brown and Lil Wayne and only later immitated by BTNH, Twista, and Tech9ne (badly, I might add). There is also an awesome verse on Big Sean's "Ass" where he does some mad speed rapping.
And by the way Tech9ne has an album called all 6s and sevens and another calle sickology and every other song of his is about some angel versus demon metaphor so that should let you know right off the bat that he is also down with the illuminati.
People need to start supporting real hip hop instead of this mainstream garbage
By the way, RA The Rugged Man also ripped off chief keef when he said bang bang in his so called "best verse in hip hop" on uncommon valor.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:THERY
Category:LONG ASS TITLE
Category:Music
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:TRUE STORY
Category:That just raises more questions!
Category:Rants
Boned in Shoreditch

I was breaking quarantine in Shoreditch. Thankfully all the hipsters have abandoned it due to a mixture of virus and a decline in the quality of craft beer.
I said to my mate Ed,
"Why the fuck do we keep coming here? It's full of the scum of the earth, the prices are outrageous and there's not even any dancing anymore. Last week I tried to break up a fight and the guy getting the shit kicked out of him told me to fuck off. that's how shit it is."
Ed Stopped still.
"To answer that, First answer why there are'nt any hipsters anymore."
"What do you mean? I literally said why in the first paragraph..."
"Well you were wrong. First of all, my name is an anagram." I tried to puzzle it out....
Oh my god.
Ed. De. DEAD!!!!
He had been a tall skeleton all this time!
He laughed boneily.
"That's right. And the reason that we have no hipsters is because we've been stealing all their hips. The Reason it's full of pricks now is that we want their boners."
"So why am I here?" I said, backing away.
"You're here because this story isn't really very funny and is a marked degradation in effort and originality from what I know you're capable of, so I'm going to take your funnybone, so that a skeleton can take the mike and actually post something worth reading. Seriously, this is a fucking shit ending."
And with that, he ripped out my funnybone and the ending was just as shit as he said it'd be.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Skeletons
Category:DIALOGUE!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta