The Epic War Between The Queer Illuminati and the Gathering of Some People

This is the epic and official sequel to What kind of a stalker are you?
Ok not so much epic.
It is highly recommended you read my long story named that blue letters (called a hyperlink you dumbass). But if you haven't here's what happened in a nutshell: A guy finds a stalker who works for The Queer Illuminati and he has to kill them.
Pretty much. But read it anyways because that was shockingly vague what I just told you and you need to read the whole story to realise what happened.
Oh well.
==THE STORY==
So there they were, our small huddle of messed up mercenaries trying to defeat EVIL PATRIXXX and his henchmen. They were not ready. They needed much more things then just a tiny group of people if they were to defeat EVIL PATRIXXX and his crew once and for all.
They needed weapons. Big ass weapons. They had to have some siege tools as well, never mind a larger group. But who would be willing enough to defeat him?
Oh yes!
Delusional idiots!
They had to go to Neverland to fetch some delusional idiots. After all, Peter Pan is clearly high. How would they get there? 
By the powers of Trollpasta of course! Anything can happen in a trollpasta! So they went back in time to World War Two on D-Day to get to the mystical portal which was there. Everyone knows that D Day made a portal to go to Neverland when the immense forces invaded creating a super dramatic rip in time, creating a portal.
They made a time machine from a cardboard box, imagination, and tomato sauce. Our protagonist, Drake, would go back to D Day, go inti the portal, and collect some high druggies. For siege they had bought some laptops, they would send them hate mail which would surely lower their emotional state decreasing their guard.
They were ready. 
Wait.
Where the hell was their HQ?
They were all set and ready, when they didn't even think about where the hell they were going!
Oh well, they just guessed South West.
Sure enough they found their base. They just so happened to walk in the exact right direction over to their HQ. The complete luck of their crew made them completely guess where to go and they hit the fucking "X" right on the spot.
Fucking genius.
The HQ was a cave, with big flashing bold letters (like the one on Drakes head in the last story), "The Queer Illuminati Super secret base DO NO ENTUR!" It was time.
They flipped open their laptops, logged on as "D1LU510N4l R3TARD", then infiltrated their high security firewall.
Their overwhelmingly strong guard,
Facebook.
'Drake Nufuri has posted on your wall, "omg rly u wnt 2 fuk familz 4monizzzz u shud kyl urslf stupid pursn"' it showed on EVIL PATRIXXX's computer.
'Oh! How offensive! I must obliterate his asshole with my mighty co-
Drake Nofora has posted on your wall, "wow ur stil goin on wow ill do u in irl m8 cum see me outsd ur baes"
"Queers! Arm your dicks!"
On the other side of the battle, they were still trolling his Facebook. After 30 mins of angry trolling, they finally decided to invade. They charged in, their tesla coils and armed proximity mines held in their hands. They first blew up his cave. Drake then yelled, "ATTAAAAACK!" 
They charged in on their noble dildoes and started to whack each other to death.
Except for Drake.
He just wanted to go for EVIL PATRIXXX.
He gazed right into his beautiful eyes. He charged in, and tried to ram his dildo in PATRIXXX's mouth.
Sure enough he missed.
PATRIXXX quickly whipped out his chode, and also tried to ram it into Drake's mouth. Drake tried lashing him with his plastic stick of greatness, but PATRIXXX kept on dodging.
In the background, some of Drakes not-so-noble troops had died from them absolutely dominating their asshole. As for Drakes boss, he was owning everyone. After all, he was very very experienced in dildo fights.
Back to Drake, him and PATRIXXX kept on playing cat and mouse with each other. On one occasion, PATRIXXX was down on the ground and he just rolled out of the way of one of Drake's iconic uber-super-combo-deadly dildo swipes.
Outside the HQ/cave, Godzilla and King kong were fighting in the background, and Chuck Norris was shooting laser beams out of his eyes at Bruce Lee.
It finally came to the moment where all of The Queer Illuminati was dead, and only Drake and his boss were remaining of The People. PATRIXXX was down on the ground, all orgasmed out, then Drakes boss tried to dive in and kill PATRIXXX.
But PATRIXXX cannot die.
Drakes boss missed and PATRIXXX quickly penetrated him in the ass so hard his brains exploded everywhere.
PATRIXXX chuckled, and floated away with a mystical force that must of been teleportation.
Drake was left there, alone.
And that's when it happened. 
He really needed to crap.
There were no toilets around, and it is awfully rude to do your business on the floor of a house you don't live in! He was doing all he can, and his mind was so focused on that, that Godzilla died and fell on the cave.
The rocks came crashing down, and Drake was helplessly left trapped in his tomb of rocks...
HE DEID!!!!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBZ
Category:Unnecessary Sequels
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Potty Humor
Category:LONG ASS TITLE
Category:Rocks Fall, Everybody Dies
Category:WHAT A TWIST!