Greek Periodic Table of Elements

The Greek Periodic Table of Elements, or the Greek Superpositional Table, is the list of the elements discovered in Ancient Greece, commonly believed by the benders of the elements, and watermelons. It has a total of four elements in its main Periodic Table, with an additional one more special element. If used incorrectly, it may cause death, but if used correctly, it will still cause death. Since four is a very tiny number, no scientist can say "Heh, I memorized the Greek Periodic Table!" without being incompetent. That makes them look stupid. Even a 4 year old can do that. 
== History ==
The Greek Periodic Table of Elements was created in ~300 BC by Aristotle "Airius". It originally had four elements (and kinda still does), those being Earth, Wind, Fire, and Water. It was assumed that Aristotle actually came up with 5 elements, however got distracted by understanding the topic of sex that he forgot what his fifth element was. In 1 AD, god's divine power added the Aether as the 5th element of the Greek Periodic Table of Elements.
In 2009, the four elements were repurposed as the four different elemental benders of the Avatar universe, with the air benders being the best. This was reverted in 2010 after the elements got into debt after THAT movie came out.
== Memorization tactics ==
Due to the several centuries that the Greek Periodic Table has existed, several methods of memorizing and studying the table have existed.
=== Method 1 ===
Say "Earth" and "Wind" and "Fire" and "Water".
=== Method 2 ===
The second method to memorize the Greek Periodic Table is to state all the four main elements, and then add Aether. As shown:
There's Fire and Earth and Water and Wind, and the Aether.
And congratulations! You've dun' it. Now you are slightly more competent than someone that learns Method 1.
=== Method 3 ===
Tom Lehrer, creator of several things, including the telephone and piano, has created a song called "The Elements", which is a recreation of a song created in around 330 BC by Aristotle.Factually correct. Listen here.
== Elements ==
Due to the minimal amount of elements located in the Greek Periodic Table, it's embarrassingly easy to condense them down to a single minute. Meaning...
* Fire - Kicks ass. The best one out of the 4, being used in the stars.
* Wind - 50% cool with us,It's not a pun. the other 50% takes shit and throws it all around. It breaks our buildings, and probably a lot of other shit.
* Water - It will and can drown you, although if you are smart with it, can be very useful, like for killing other people.
* Earth - A pretty cool element, although we exploit it a lot. Fortunately, it seems that both Earth and us do not care.
* Aether - Kind of counts. Removing it from the periodic table will cause another biblical flood.
=== Aether ===
For some reason, aether is an actual element located on the Greek Periodic Table. It was theorized by Plato that there was another fifth element that was the most tranquil of them all, called the Aether. It was later called quintessence, a slightly less cooler word, although a still cool word. It has received the Newton approval of science.
== Classification ==
Unlike the regular periodic table of elements, there are no categories for elements! However, most people separate the Greek Periodic Table of Elements into two different types of groups:
* The main 4: The ones everyone knows. Saying that you don't know them can result in 5 minutes of non-stop Greek aggression.
* The other one (Aether): It's just here.
Including any other element here will result in something happening.
== The other tables ==
* The Regular Periodic Table
* The Idiotic Table of Elements
* The Canadian Periodic Table of the Elements
== Notes ==
Category:Elements
Category:Greece
Category:Periodic tables
Category:Chemistry
Category:Furniture