nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
To Find the Real World

For this ritual to work you must find a public restroom with no mirrors. Restaurants are the best for this to work. Go inside the restaurant and ask to use the bathroom. You must need to go or the worker will say you are a liar. If that doesn't happen and you go to the restroom anyway it will be blocked off forever from this ritual. When you enter the bathroom you must lock the door behind you or an evil presence will enter and never leave your dreams. Go about your business as you usually would then go to wash your hands. Stare at the wall where a mirror should be but isn't. Turn off the water and stare at that space, never letting your eyes wander away. Slowly silence will start to occupy the sounds of customers or the outside world. When the sound dies a hazy reflection of yourself will appear. This is a sign that you have done things correctly. Take a deep breath and go outside without drying your hands. The outside world will be void of people or animals, completely empty. You are inside your mind, the world your brain created but without the imaginary creatures you thought up to combat the loneliness. This knowledge will always be at the forefront of your thoughts. If you see a person in this empty world, they are not to be trusted. This person is there to make sure you don't find out this truth that your world is really empty. You must pretend that there are still others walking around. Do not show that you are aware of reality or the person will take you away to a place beyond hell itself. When you feel your hands start to dry, run back into the bathroom before they do and you will be safe. If you let your hands dry in the real world you will be trapped forever, having to pretend that humanity exists. But then again... you're already pretty good at it, aren't you?
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Rituwel
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
To Kill a Pokemon

I love Pokemon games. I always played them. Even though I was 16, I still stuck with the series. I decided to buy Pokemon Red, since my old one was thrown away. My friend drove me to Gamestop, and when I got there, it had Pokemon Red, only with no label.
At home, I put the cartridge in, and was ready to play some memories. It started up, only the Nidorino and Gengar at the start looked dead. Then, it came to the screen, and instead of alive Pokemon that Red at the start had, they looked zombie-like, chunks of flesh missing and bone showing.
I turned the game off. I know not to trust that shit. I threw it in the garbage. The. End.
Originally uploaded in 2011
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Pokemon
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Old Shit
Category:Shortpasta
To My Dearest Droog Reginald Raleigh Toothbottom

You are a sickly gluttonous parasite and primitive small-minded display of indecency, and are an incalculaby lascivious subhuman and a rank feeble-minded nefarious vermin of curious design, I fart in your general direction, you snarling, butt ugly reprobate that licks his mum's bumhole as she sleeps. I scoff at what a derelict ninny you are, it shakes my top hat knowing how much of a malefactor you are, you don't belong in this world.
You may think your tough gazongles now, but one of these days, the hammer will drop on your numb skull, you can't handle the real world, you skinny, ecxuse making disgrace to the world.
I simply adore all the pointless banter you make of me, all the warblings that make up your scum filled mozg, the likes of which is very feeble indeed, you dolt. I would like to see you face me in real life, you won't be ninnyfapping when I cut off your yarbles with a nozh and shove it up your wizzwazz, that would be a horrorshow of fun, the vred I will cause opon you will be so spoogy it will cause you to snuff it...
I won't be sammy to you if i find you, you festering scoteena, because you have razdrazed me for the last time, I will take great radosty to the vred my nozh will spingly on your diddly doo, you pering looking waste, I wish you would dezazzle off and perry in a pit, you slimy kitzat waste of a human being, did dads condom bugger off as he hagulated the missus, could that reasonate with your being?
I wish that your birth givers would doogly themselves, so they don't create more foul beasts in the world, you sewer dwelling, Excrement eating dildo fanny, your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries, now diddly off, you failure to the world, I have a missus to doodly up the wizzwazz...
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Rants
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Inside Jokes
Category:Shortpasta
Toad

This story started a long day ago at my local Gamestop. I went to buy a copy of Super Mario Bros. for the NES. But the only copy that was standing right behind the cashier was an copy of the game, but photoshopped with the title "Toad".
That was really weird, since I don't recall Toad being playable in the game itself. But as any goddamn creepypasta protagonist would do, I bought the game for 20 dollars and went to my house so I could play it.
The start was just like Super Mario Bros. However, the title, instead of saying Super Mario Bros., it said Toad's Adventure. I never thought Toad would get a game starring himself as the main protagonist! I mean, for real!
When I pressed start, the screen turned black for 20 seconds just to reveal the textbox saying:
"Welcome to your doom!"
My doom? What was my doom? You mean Doom, like, the videogame?
Well, it was the start of the level. It was just like 1 - 1, except the Goombas and the Koopas let out a squishing sound with some bone cracks when I jumped on them. Kinda creepy, to say at least. When I touched the flagpole, the jingle that plays whenever you finish a level is lower pitched and the firework sounds were all glitched out.
In 1 - 2, Toad entered an blood-stained pipe just to see Mario, all mangled up, with his intestines tore out, and blood coming out of him. I didn't care about it, only to find out that I was in an infinite loop of the same scene. Over and over and over again. It goes on and on for 40 seconds only to be greeted with another textbox, saying:
"bup"
I got confused by just seeing the word bup. What does it mean? What is bup anyways?
And then... I got to 1 - 3.
The screen was filled with Toad's face, the music was replaced with Toad's voice, everything in the game became Toad. My ears couldn't even handle the sheer pressure of Toad's voice, it was too loud...
I'm writing this note from...I don't fucking know, this year? Anyways, Toad is too powerful. Help m
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Mario
Category:Pointless Violence
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Shortpasta
Toadgee

I heard of a cute little character. His name was Toad. I thought he would be a frog of some sort. He seems to be a mushroom person. I played Super Mario Bros. and never got to the castle. So I never got to see Toad. My friend told me that Toad is the spawn of all evil. He also told me that since Weegee has taken over his character he has been sticking shrooms in people's mouths at night. I decided to look for a ROM of Super Mario Bros. on CoolROM, I found one that says Super Toad Bros. I decided to download it and see what it was about. The screenshots were just stock images of Toad. But I noticed in the eyes there was a Weegee head. Toad looked scared as well. I decided to ignore it because the person who uploaded it was probably trying to trick people into not playing it. The ROM finally downloaded, I looked into the ZIP it came in and there was the ROM and a folder that said "Emulator for Super Toad Bros." I decided to ignore it and tried to launch the ROM on my emulator. It gave a graphical error message, so then I decided to extract the folder with the emulator for Super Toad Bros. I booted it up and saw the title screen. The title screen was in comic sans, and it said "Super Toad Bros." Once I pressed start. I instantly was dropped into the game, it showed Toad walking into a pipe. Once I was able to move I started to jump on the first Goomba, the screen stuttered. So I jumped on another, stuttering again. After I finally got through the stuttering level I was instantly put into the last level. I got to the end to find a Weegee head. I tried to jump over it but it blocked me, and started to take over Toad's body. After seeing this gruesome scene, a message popped up saying "You're not ready for the Weegee." and the last thing I saw before I ran out of my room was Toad but with Weegee's face. After the night, I deleted the game instantly hoping to never see it again. Now I believe my friend that Toad's body got taken over by Weegee. He is so FREAKING DEMENTED!
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Mario
Category:SUPR SKAREY IMAG
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Wall of Text
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Today I Met Brandon Fraser

Having been abandoned by everyone I knew, I set out to a remote town called Bollcksinyue, a kind of dating town for single men. What got me was that it was full of things that I thought had closed down. I got on the phone to an old freind at once.
"Hey man, You remember that kinda ok video store that people have loads of nostalgia for even though CEX is basically it but better and still around?"
"Uh you mean-"
"Yeah! There's a Cockthrusters! A Cockthrusters right here in this town! And I just saw Brandon Fraser going in!"
"You mean Blockbusters? And who's Brandon Fraser?"
"Yeah Blockbusters, sure. But you're telling me you don't know Brandon Fraser? Star of National Treasure, Family Guy and this is England?"
"Man I think you got mixed up somewhere or made a typo, maybe you're thinking of-" But in my excitement at seeing Brandon Fraser I had already hung up and rushed toward Brandon in my excitement.
"Brandon! Brandon! I just love your work! Why have you been denied to us all these years? Will you zoom all my buddies with me?"
Brandon Fraser looked a little bit older than I remembered, and was mostly bald. He mostly looked puzzled.
"I never knew Girl from Iceland had such a devoted fanbase. But if you want, sure."
Soon enough I had Brandon Fraser on video chat. My friends failed to be suitably impressed.
"Cmon, haven't you guys even heard of Brandon Fraser? He lives in my town!"
"Man I think you got mixed up somewhere. Nobody ever heard of Brandon Fraser. Maybe you're thinking of Brenden Fraser? He's having a comeback after a few years of therapy. Got a new HBO series. From Imdb all I can find is one film for Brandon Fraser." Brandon Fraser let out a low, guttural grow.
"All my life have I lived in that whelp's shadow! For one fleeting moment I thought I had a fan at last, but now you mock me like this?"
"Oh.... Sorry man. I really thought you were Brandon Fraser. Are you Brandon Stark then, from Game of Thrones? Or Frasier from Cheers?"
Brandon Fraser threw back his head and let out an inhuman scream, accompanied by a beam of black light from his mouth, tearing through the ceiling and causing a shadow to envelop Bollcksinyue. Soon enough, Private Fraser from Dad's army appeared in front of me.
"You've doomed us all, Dooomed us! This town was the last refuge of the lesser Frasers! The only person who'll report on our fate is Fraser Nelson, and that's only if he survives this terror you've unleashed upon us you daft yank!" With that Brandon Fraser transformed into a giant made of hate and smashed Private Fraser into the ground. I ran for cover in the only building still standing, Cockthrusters video store and saw a copy of George of the Jungle.
"Ohhh.... Brenden Fraser sure I know that guy." Before the heat of Brandon Fraser's offended honour consumed us all.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Memes
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Today I fucked up by gone girling my husband

My idiot husband told me for four years that he loved my tuna casserole. Then one night that stupid bastard got drunk and and said "actually babe I'm not really into tuna I just didn't wanna hurt your feelings."
So it turns out he was not the man I agreed to marry (a man who likes my tuna casserole) and he clearly did not love the woman I really was. He would obviously rather have a Cool Girl who cooks him medium rare steak every night. For these reasons I believe he deserves to fucking fry.
Now that I faked my death and framed him for my murder and all that, I realized that when he gets the death penalty I won't get the satisfaction of watching that son of a bitch die a slow painful death. Oops!
I don't know how I will explain away all this but do I that know I need to go back to my hubby so I can take care of him myself >:-)
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Well, that was anticlimactic.
Category:Look at me! I'm SO EDGY!
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Today I learned I do not live alone, and that's fucking BULLSHIT

Exscuse my GOD DAMN LANGUAGE.
I was just outside planting some flowers when I feel something tug on the bottom of my shirt.
I should've kicked at it, but no, I turned around and saw myself crouching in front of a fucking Gnome. This son of a bitch looked just like the statues.
He had a smug face. The really punchable kind. You'll see the reason for this hostility in a moment...
"Sorry to bother you," said the gnome, "but could you possibly spare a few of your seeds sir? My family is preparing for the cold weather and I am having a hard time finding any food around here!"
Most people would probably be amazed at the sight, or even shocked, but I am not the kind to give a fuck about gnome with extreme facial hair growth trying to take my own shit.
"Sorry, but I bought these seeds for $30 in a really clean looking alleyway. I do not wish to part with them." And that was the whole truth. These seeds were said to grow a turkey by Thanksgiving.
At that point, the little fuck closed his left eye like he was Popeye the Manchild and raised his fists at me.
"oi m8 im not gonna ask ye agaen cunt"
"EXSCUSE me??!?" I shouted. Who does this cunt think he is coming into MY backyard?
"look m8 i dunt ker wot ur growin' alls i knoe is thut ahm taken et!!!" The bastard made a whistle noise, and suddenly 50 gnomes jump at me from the trees like monkeys.
They didn't knock me out, they didn't kidnap me, and no, they did not steal my god damn socks.
They broke my shins by bashing them with their steel-toed boots. The sheer strength was mind-fucking.
"olrite boys, thas enuff." As the gnomes walked away, the first one got real close to my face. I wanted to bite his head off.
"dis 'ouse? ihts aurs now m8. hope ye got cumcast or ur gonna get banged all over ya gabba like ye kissed tha conkrete!!!"
I'm stuck on the ground outside with my phone. I can see them in my living room on my couch watching rollerblading tournaments on ESPN.
Any advice on how to get these fuckers back? I am beyond angry right now.
One lesson learned: Give a gnome what he wants, or else he'll turn into a chav with no respect. Little assholes.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Beings
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Today something happened

Today I was playing some harmless Terraria.
I was on a world that I had started with my friend on the PS3 version of the game. We created some new characters but had to delete some old characters to create the new ones. Once we had done that, I deleted my old world and started a new one.
We spawned in a Forest biome, collected as much wood as we needed to build a house, and made the necessary requirements for a new world. After some mining and wood-chopping, he had to go home. I saved and exited off of the game. Later I was bored of watching TV and went back upstairs to play Terraria again. Though, something was wrong.
I went to select which character to use and I saw that our new characters were gone; but our old ones were back. I thought this was a messed up save so I deleted the old characters again and made exact copies of the new characters. My new world wasnt destroyed, so I played on it. 
This was my mistake.
I went on and my wood house was broken down, blocks missing. My friends house was gone with nothing but two gravestones left. I went over to read them and they each said "Zed was killed by Sayan" and "Ison was killed by Jake". These were the names of our new characters and our old delted characters. I quickly shut off the machine. Later I booted it back up to try and delete the old characters a second time and the world.
Another mistake.
Even though it had worked, when I created my characters again and my world, a gravestone appeared  saying "You shouldnt of done that" and the game deleted itself, along with me.
Category:Deletion Log Refugees
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Vidya games
Category:Im died
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Shortpasta
Toenail

If you pick your toenails, it means they are dirty, it means you don't clean, it means you're gross, it means HE is watching.. Soap Man, he watches from the outside, he knows you aren't cleaning and he will make sure you do.
This story is going to scare you, because this is every dirty persons WORST nightmare. Even if you think it's not, it's creative see, and this story WILL scare you, it is everything you are against. Clean, hygienic and not filthy.
Soap Man will bring all your joy of being a pig to an end. You knew you could never be a pig anyway, being dirty was the closest you had, but Soap Man decided against it, and ruined everything, because he's a dick!
So remember, if you are content with being filthy, just remember, Soap Man will ruin your life, because God hates you.
Category:Well, that was pointless.
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Shortpasta
Toilet Poker

For this game, you will need a deck of playing cards, and of course, a toilet.
First, sit down on the toilet. Take your deck of cards, and lay out ten of them, face-down, in two rows of five. Don't cheat, or the toilet will know.
Next, take a shit in the toilet. DO NOT FLUSH, or the ritual will not work.
Once you've shit (Shat? Shitted?), whisper "all in."
Take the row of cards closest to you and hold them in your hand. If you want, you can replace up to two of them with another card from the deck.
Next, it's the toilet's turn. You'll notice the cards on the far row shuffle around a bit. Up to two from the deck may move into the toilet's hand on their own, as two from the initial hand are discarded.
Now, the time has come to reveal your hands. Place your cards back on the floor in front of you, facing up. The toilet's cards will flip upside by themselves.
If you beat the toilet, your shit will be transmuted into solid gold for you to fish out.
However, if you have the losing hand, the last thing you hear will be evil laughter from inside the pipes, and the last thing you feel will be the toilet's SUPER HYPER-REALISTIC VACUUM SUCC hollowing you out completely as your innards are flushed away.
Dare you take the risk?
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Satire
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Rituwel
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Originally on r/shittynosleep
Category:Shortpasta
Category:Hyper-realistic
Toilet Seat Copypasta

I like when the toilet seat is still warm from the last person. You know exactly what I mean. I've always heard all my life "eww the seat is still warm" or "I hate when the toilet seat is warm" but I've never agreed with it. In my lonesome, I've come to like when the seat is warm. I hate to put this out in public but it's true. It's so nice. No more worrying if the seat is frozen cause the AC is blasting or if the seat is made out of some ceramic that freezes your ass. It's comfort. It's like a Bluetooth high-five between you and the last user. It's like buying a car because your friend has the same model. It's a mutual bond which warms my heart. I type this sitting on a pre warmed toilet seat, I like when the toilet seat is still warm.
Category:Trollpasta
Category:Copypasta
Category:Pages with grammar that doesn't suck
Category:Potty Humor
Category:Shortpasta
Tom And Jerry: Blue Cat Blues Part II

Do You Know the Old Show Tom And Jerry? Well Do you Also Know the Last Episode: Blue Cat Blues??? well If you watched it or not Try Researching it On Google or Whatsoever.
Well... here's what happened, Its episode 103 or 104. Its starts By Tom sitting on the train tracks waiting for a train to kill him cuz he is doing suicide. it was Jerry talking about a love story, But His Girlfriend Marrys another Mouse And He Joins Tom on the Railroad Tracks.
It Shows the Ending By The Train Horn And it Ends Slowly Without Showing them die. I don't know who died, Maybe Tom or Jerry.But One Day, I So A Link in Google Saying "Tom And Jerry: Blue Cat Blues Part II.
So I Pressed it and it Starts In 1 Second only. When It started the Background Music It Was Going Backwards and The screen was full of blood. And It didn't show Tom or Neither Jerry In the Title Card it just said Lom nor Berry.
It Sounded Funny But when it started it Shows the Ending Jerry and Tom Sitting on the railroad tracks And The horn gets louder and Tom crying in blood and The train hits them. A Thousands of blood comes out and with Tom with black eyes and Jerry with a hole in the stomach, It shows the Driver in the train smiling Creepily.
Tom and Jerry fall to the river and showing the back of the train. It Ends With a Dead smile of Tom starring at me and later crashes for about 12 minutes. And Shows the Ending Title card backwards like this "End The..."
It turned Pitch Black And Continued Saying "End the World" And this Words Came Flashing like forever in my Screen: Born Alive old Die Died...
It Also Said "Tom and Jerry will get You, Get out of America and die!!! In 21 Years!!!"
I Closed my laptop and went to Sleep I didn't Scream or whatever, I had a thousands of nightmares like Tom and Jerry Killing Me, And more like that. So I Din't watch that video Ever Again Cuz It was still printed in Google, This is my Worse Nightmare.
Category:Lost Episodes
Category:Bad Creepypasta
Category:Cliche Madness
Category:WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT
Category:English Class Failure
Category:Shortpasta