nyuuzyou/wikis huggingface dataset:
Johnny English

Johnny English is the name attributed to a particular British MI7 secret service agent by The Times newspaper. This agent in particular is famed for his actions in the year 2003 when he thwarted (according to reports, almost entirely) the plans of insane French businessman Pascal Sauvage. According to filmed evidence some deduce he may have a accomplice called "Boff" or "Geoff".
== The Sauvage Affair ==
Although very little is known about "English" as he was called, he did enter the public stage very abruptly during the 2003 botched coronation of Sauvage, and due to a mistake on his part was publicly humiliated at the event. However, English triumphed when a last ditch attempt to stop the crowning took place as he swung from the rails in an attempt to grab the crown before it was placed on Sauvage's head.
By freak incident English fell into the space that should have been occupied by Sauvage as the crown fell and English was crowned king. Of course English surrendered his new powers back to the Queen within the hour, but made sure that Sauvage was severely punished.
According to The Times, which insisted it didn't make up the name, English was knighted at his request and returned to active duty as soon as the entire affair was over.
== Embarrassment ==
This entire affair which shot English into the public imagination was very embarrassing for the entire British establishment and English himself, who had to endure a DVD of himself in a bathroom miming ABBA's "Does Your Mother Know" which was playing at full blast in the background. The agent looked in astonishment as his seemingly private moments were broadcast candidly for the world to see, but he was seemingly embraced by the British public, as their very own real James Bond.
== Spotted Dick? ==
Of course because of the seemingly inept nature of the agent (even though he ultimately triumphed) Johnny English is a name given to many British spy cock-ups ever since 2003, but English was finally actually spotted again in Russia in 2006, at the head of an opperation to spy on the Russian Tsarat Embassy. Pictures in newspapers followed for weeks afterward, the Sun even giving over half it's paper to the man it called "HERO-CK".
== Sequel ==
In the unreleased sequel to the film hilarity ensued when English attempted to foil a notorious anti-dog humping ring, but instead ended up interrupting the 2052 annual women's Mongolian darts team. "Johnny English and the Johnny Troubles" went straight to DVD. Ironically, the deleted scenes (Deleted of scenes of an unreleased film Lol! Lulz! Pancakes!) show English being severely raped by a cocker spaniel.
Category:Espionage
Category:British films
Category:Comedy films
Category:English culture
Johnny Rockets

Johnny Rockets is an nation-wide, 50s-themed food chain in the United States. The service and food they strive to provide are always 100%-authentically "50s." From the "mad cow" and e. coli-free hamburgers, to the whole milk milkshakes, the fat-filled fries, and the simple and elegant "Coke" (you won't find any of the PC-era "diet" or "low-fat" food here), this experience is wholly a 50s-dining experience.
==Experience==
As far as the service goes, there's always a waitress with a beehive hairdo to take your order, the jolly, overweight man at the cook station, and your friendly neighborhood negro coming around to sweep the floors.
==Atmosphere==
Johnny Rockets has segregated seating for the extra-special "50s" experience. They take pride in letting you sit and enjoy your meal with your white friends, away from the coloreds, just like white folks did in the 1950s. However, if you do want to sit with your colored friends, you can feel free to do so in the "colored section." You will, of course, get leered at and scolded by the other white patrons, but trust that they don't mean any of it; it's all a part of the fun and exciting atmosphere of Johnny Rockets!
==Food==
*Wholly-fattening food of the 50s
*Coca-Cola Classic
*Greasy burgers, greasy fries
Category:Restaurants
Jon Nödtveidt

Jon Nödtveidt was a Swedish musician, best known for his creation of the first ever Satanic Black Metal band 'Dissection' at just 6 years old, which began the black metal scene and birthed bands such as Venom, Burzum, Mayhem, Immortal, Darkthrone, and Dimmu Borgir. 
==Early Life==
Jon was born on the 28th of June, 1975, somewhere in Sweden. His birth was miraculous as his mother fell down a cave entrance, stomach first, and he prematurely shot out of her birth canal like a trebuchet. He ended up at a separate end of the cave from his mother in complete darkness, and he was so shocked that he forgot to cry, making him impossible to locate. His mother tirelessly searched for him, but after a while decided that he must have died, so she just climbed out and went back home. Jon, for the first 6 years of his life, wondered around in the pitch blackness of the cave, and ate crickets from the ground as his only source of food. He spent most of his days screaming demonically, hallucinating, doing bicep curls, sacrificing rodents and summoning the Devil. Eventually, at 6 years old, he became strong enough to climb out and begin his music career.
==The beginning: Dissection== 
====Trendsetter==== 
He wrote his first album 'The Somberlain' in 1981 upon his escape, which included tracks about his childhood such as 'A Land Forlorn', 'Mother Fell', 'In the Dark Cave of Nowhere' and 'Cricket Towers'. Not only did his music have an incredible impact on black metal soundally, but physically as well. He had extremely long hair and a pale face from never getting a hair cut and never touching the sun, and often times in his psychotic episodes he would smear dirt over his eyes in attempt to see something. Because of this, everyone started to copy his appearance by growing their hair out and wearing 'corpse-paint', to mimic his severely discoloured face. Per "Dead" Ohlin of Mayhem was one of the first people to mimic this appearance, thus being wrongly named as the founder of corpse-paint.
Jon Snow

Jon Snow (born 28 September 1947) is an English journalist and presenter, formerly employed as Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. He is best known for his vast collection of colourful ties and socks. He comes from a family of 'Snowmen', his cousin is Peter 'the Windmill' Snow.
==Early life==
Jon was raised on the House Stark estate in Ardingly, Sussex. He was believed to be the illegitimate son of Lord Eddard Stark, and was brought up alongside his trueborn children, despite Lady Stark's objections. As a young man, he attended the University of Liverpool, although he did not remain there long enough to complete his degree.
He was expelled for throwing paint over a statue of the honored Queen Victoria of House Targaryen, an offence classified by the mad King Aerys as close to treason. Jon Snow was put on trial, and sentenced either to death or to exile to the frozen north, to Hadrian's Wall in Scotland. Being a fairly sensible chap, he chose the latter.
==The Night's Watch==
At Hadrian's Wall, Jon Snow swore to defend his country, forsaking his old life, and pledging celibacy. Unsurprisingly, he was not quite able to keep that oath, and his paramours include Anna Ford, Madeline Colvin, and Ygritte, who according to Jon, is 'wild.' Rumours have also circulated about his involvement with Princess Daenerys of House Targaryen, a direct descendant of Queen Victoria.
Despite these indiscretions, Jon's career at the wall proved successful, and only a few years later he was elected Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. This, despite the prestigious title, was a 'fairly tedious desk job' according to Snow, and he soon found himself devoting more time to his hobbies.
==Later Career==
Jon Snow's forays into radio communication began with LBC, a small station that came to unexpected prominence when Jon began to broadcast about the Threat Beyond The Wall, or Scotland. His talent was soon recognized, and he was given many offers to move south and become a political correspondent. Finally, perhaps inevitably, he accepted, and reported on the Machiavellian machinations of the country's elite for Channel 4.
He has been remarkably successful, to the point where he was offered an OBE. He turned this down, however, fearing it would hurt his impartiality, and his anti-establishment credentials.
==Conspiracy Theories==
It is said by some than Jon Snow is in fact the son of Rhaegar Targaryen. This is impossible, as it would make him the nephew of his sometime lover, Daenerys. These lies were probably spread by those who detest his brightly-colored socks, pet albino wolf, or political stances.
==External links==
*Jon Snow's Blog on the Channel 4 News web site
*Jon's profile at ITN.co.uk
*Jon Snow biography at Oxford Brookes University
*Jon Snow interview From London's Evening Standard
*Snowmail Jon Snow's daily email newsletter
Category:British journalists
Category:British radio personalities
Category:British television personalities
Jonas Salk

Jonas "Chompy" Salk (7/4/1774 - 2/30/1996) is best known as the inventor of the polio vaccine, elevator music, and homework. He was also the third part of the Trinity (after he beat the Holy Spirit in a high-stakes game of Parchesi.)
thumb|Jonas Salk attempts to create Liquid Satan
==Early Life==
Jonas E. Salk was born in Pittsburgh, but soon moved to Boston, Massachusetts, fighting (at less than a year old) at the Battle of Lexington. At a young age, Jonas showed a knack for technology. However, he was also known as "Time Magizine's Most Boring Person of the Century" and "The One Person the World Could Most Live Without".
For example, Jonas was vacationing with his family in Serbia in June 1914. While he was there, Jonas met the Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Jonas told Franz about his plans to cure the flu, and the archduke was bored to death. This eventually led to World War 1. 
In 1920, Jonas Salk was in an elevator in the Empire State Building. It was a long way up, and he was getting bored. He thought it would be a good idea if music played while someone was in an elevator. Jonas hired the singer Seal to record some songs, but due to a miscommunication, a band called "Clubbing Baby Seals" showed up instead. Unfortunately, Jonas enjoyed the music, and elevator music became the horror it is today.
hi oscar from Caesar
==The Polio Vaccine==
Around 1950, millions of children were being crippled by polio. Most Americans didn't care, mainly because they thought children in leg braces were funny. But Jonas Salk wanted to cure polio. He tried to create a vaccine, and, mostly by sheer luck, succeeded. 
Jonas Salk tested the vaccine on babies, who instantly exploded. But Jonas sold the vaccine, and through another miraculous event, it worked. (Some believe this was a result of divine intervention, which is one reason Salk was sainted by the Church of Scientology).
your mom
 got :)
==Later Life==
After inventing the polio vaccine, Jonas decided to try and cure AIDS. Many people think this is because Jonas was a kind person, but he was actually planning to put a mind-control poison in the vaccine. Luckily for humanity, he wasn't able to create a vaccine.
Around that time, Jonas Salk had a secret affair with Barbara Bush, which resulted in his illegitimate son, George W. Bush. (This is one reason why people hate Jonas Salk so much)
Jonas Salk continued working on his AIDS vaccine until about the 1980s, when the computer was invented. He was fascinated by the computer and wanted to create games for it. He also enjoyed Dungeons and Dragons (he was voted Minnesota's 'Paladin of the Year' 8 years in a row), so he decided to create a combination of the two. Thus the MMORPG was born. Early MMORPGs were stupid, but as graphics got better and better, more people were drawn into Salk's trap. Jonas realized what he had done, and tried to create a vaccine for MMORPG addiction. Unfortunately, he started playing his own games, and never finished the vaccine. He died in 1996 after playing World of Warcraft for 57 hours straight without eating or drinking.
Category:Dead
Category:Doctors
Category:Oscar_Wildeizms
Jonny Wilkinson

Jonathan Peter "Jonny" Wilkinson OBE (born 25 May 1979 in Frimley, Surrey) is an orange "rugby" player who first noticed his abilities when he started kicking potatoes at his headmaster and is known by the English as the savior of rugby. When he first got called up to the England squad he got so excited that a little bit of wee came out. He is currently on loan to England from Newcastle General Hospital where he is kept in laboratory conditions. Jonny is often regarded as the single greatest man who ever lived by English people, this is due to their eternal debt to him for saving their country from Vikings, Napoleon, Hitler and Australians. Following this Jonny achieved his own personal goal in 2003 when he fulfilled his purpose of existence, kicked a match winning goal and angered Australia's Prime Minister, Paul Hogan who had to either give Jonny a little trophy or kill 15 Australians. As Australia had suffered a recent population decline, killing this many Australian males would be classed as genocide, leaving only 12 sports mad Kangaroos and the Minogue Sisters. 
He is infamous for teaching David Beckham the art of kicking over the crossbar, a skill that young David put into good use against Portugal in the 2004 Euro Cup.
So little Jonny lifted the trophy but this unfortunately compressed his spine. Martin Johnson then took care of the trophy by eating it to ensure Paul Hogan didn't change his mind and throw the trophy back into the lake. 
Jonny was rushed to the local hospital where Dr Bruce pronounced him dead. Clive Woodward thought this might be bad for business so resurrected his spirit into the body of a Gecko, who's brain had been give to Lawrence Dalallgiogie in a half time transplant. 
Rugby players are not a naturally occurring phenomenon in England. (See Welsh Rugby Mines) So a suitable body had to be created for Jonny. With a sizable loan from the National Lottery Commission for Sports, Hobbies and Little Boys, The guardian of English Rugby, Jeremy Gusset, was able to mould a replica body out of unused Rugby League players and a large amount of bone china. Jonny's spirit was then take from the Gecko and transferred into this lifeless form and all was well with English Rugby once more, until little Jonny was called upon to play. 
In a friendly between England and Paraguay U21, Clive Woodward needed a replacement for Martin Johnson who had been sin binned three times for eating opponents. Little Johnnie was called upon, fresh from the hospital bed. Whilst trying to run from Paraguay's Carlo Parlo, Jonny attempted to shed his Gecko tail in a plot to confuse the South American. As he no longer had a tail, the resulting muscle action snapped all of little Jonny's bone china. The damage was irreparable. The decision was made to donate Jonny to medical rugby science where he has since been used in experiments to test the effect of hypothetical injuries on a player's popularity.
Jonny Wilkinson is worshipped by the English as the greatest thing ever, ever. But in reality he's utter fucking shit and i hate him.
Something like, his tackle is very big sometimes.
==Quotes==
Category:British sportspeople
Joplin, Missouri

A little known fact about the city of Joplin is that it sits directly over a gateway to Heaven. This gateway was referenced in the little known sequal to Rocky, Rocky 2. As of the 2000 census, Joplin has a healthy population.
==History==
The name Joplin actually comes from the German phrase "heaven on earth". Thus again making references to the gateway to Heaven. It is believed that the gateway was created by two early German explorers and druids, Scott and Janis Joplin. After learning of the areas unique qualities they decided it would be a perfect place to communicate directly with God. They used the cover of Lead mining so other local religious zealots would not try to over take their gateway. 
By the turn of the century Joplin was quick becoming a metropolis of good. Construction centered around 4th and Virginia Streets, which is now the location for the Central Church. The congregation is now lead by Hank Deslatte, a man of God.
==Future==
Home of Kent "Pollo Loco" Gomez leader of the future fowl rebellion. Preparations are already underway, the armies of Butterball and Tyson will ravage the globe. Residents are encouraged to stockpile arms and beef products for the coming war.
== Geography ==
Joplin is located at 37°4'40" North, 94°30'40" West (37.077760, -94.511024).
Joplin is located just to the north of Highway I-44, near the Western Passage into the vast plains and tornado ally.
== Notables ==
Joplin's goodness has been even recorded in song a local band, Faces of Adam, titled "Jesus loves Joplin".
It is the home of the famous Forklift driver, Old Mcdonald. 
It has also been a favorite vacation spot to a famous teacher, Jenna Bush.
Also note that Hulk Holgan once stopped at a Joplin restaurant Big R's for some BBQ ribs.
 
== External links ==
*local newspaper
*location
Category:Missouri
Joy Adamson

Joy Adamson was a well known kitty Fiddler and gin drinker.
 
== Early Life ==
Joy Adamson was born 20 January 1910 in Austria, but was called Friederike Victoria Gessner which was rather unfortunate, so when her first husband married her he called her "Joy". This was rather inapropriate as she had a sad childhood and her mother cooked her pet rabbit during the war.
As most young women, she had ideas beyond her station, and she considered a career in medicine and also that of a concert painist!!
She later regained her senses and married a rich man.
She divorced the rich man when a man with a wide variety of pets came along, his name was George Adamson.
George Adamson was a park ranger in Kenya he loved lions, elephants, cheetahs and almost any animal that he could shoot. He had previously been employed to quell the Mau Mau, who were a loud disco-pop band that roamed Kenya killing people who simply wanted a cold gin on the verandha, served at dusk by little jibjib that they had stolen as a child from his parents and enslaved as a rent/house boy.
== What she did in Kenya ==
Joy drank gin and painted some pretty pictures, she was also rude to her African staff.
== Pets ==
Joy had a lot of pets which she wrote lots of books about.
She captured wild animals and then really messed with their heads before releasing them into the wild to be shot by poachers.
Her favourite pet was a lion called Elsa.
George had shot Elsas mother, so Joy kept Elsa and stroked and fed her and then released her.
Elsa had some cubs and then died.
 
Joy wrote a book about it. Most of Joys pets bit her African staff quite a lot.
== What happened to her? ==
Joy was murdered by a cross African because Joy was a cross, slightly rascist Austrian. George was shot by poachers because they were cross as they wanted to shoot lions.
== Books ==
Joy wrote many books some may have included:
*Born Free
*Live Free
*Forever Free
*Duty Free
*Sugar Free
*Humour Free
*Fact Free
*Gluten Free
*BPA Free
==Other Media==
A film was made about Elsa and Joy. Bill and Ginny mcWherter played Joy and George whilst Shep the dog played Elsa. It was a worldwide smash and is shown in schools even now, to help promote harmony among the races and the capture of wild endangered species. A statue of Elsa and Joy was unveiled by Nelson Mandela in a shopping mall in Durban.
Category:British writers
Category:Drunks Who Are Not Alcoholics
Category:Hot Babes You Don't Have A Chance With
Juche

Juche (주체사상) is the main idea pursued by the only party in the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea for the North Koreans. It was invented by the great stalker, the everlasting red sun, and the only leader, Kim Il-sung.
==Origins==
Although the North Korean Prison Party is a political party that practices communism, it still needs to be original, so Kim Il-sung came up with Juche, which is basically another name for communism plus self-reliance. It is believed that it is used to collect the property of the whole people to support the state, basically feeding Kim Il-sung and his descendants and the Inner Party.
==Principles==
The main point of the main idea is that Kim Il-sung can always be a "proletarian villager" who cares for everyone.
The highest guiding principle of the subjective thinking pursued by the North Korean Prison Party with brain damage is:
*The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea is a country founded by people.
*Kim Il-sung is the (cause of) brain (damage) in North Korea.
*The Party and villagers are to listen to the brain for command.
*Because Kim Il-sung is wise, Kim Il-sung's family is also wise.
*It is precisely because Kim Il-sung's family is wise that only they can lead the Republic.
*It is precisely because the head of state of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea can only be employed by Kim Il-sung, so the position of the head of state is adopted by the hereditary system – and others are pig brains.
*The North Korean villagers must be filial to Kim Il-sung because Kim Il-sung's family is the brain.
Category:North Korea
Judge Reinhold

Judge Reinhold (1957-2005) was an American actor and jurist, known for his portrayal of 'nice-guy' characters in 1980s comedy movies and for his brutal enforcement of the law in Mega City One.
==Biography==
Born in Wilmington, Delaware, Reinhold studied at the North Carolina School of the Arts and the Mega City One Justice Department Academy. His first major film role was in Fast Times At Ridgemont High, which he filmed shortly before his epic battle with the Angel Gang. Following this, he went on to appear in the Beverly Hills Cop movies and fight Jerry Springer, an undead demon from another dimension.
Judge Reinhold's career slowed down after the 1980s, but he was still able to save Mega City One from Soviet aggression and team up with Batman and communistic Strontium Dog. He auditioned for the hit early-90's TV show I am the Law & Order but lost the role to Sylvester Stallone. This is generally considered to mark the end of his media career.
Also may or may not be the interdimensional brother of Night Court actor John Larroquette, we haven't decided yet. Actually, it's pretty damn easy to confuse Larroquette with Reinhold for some strange reason.
Part of their master plan?
He is a founding member of the Justice Society.
== Tragic Death ==
While working with the Justice Society, Reinhold battled many foes. However, he was killed by Freddie Mercury in 2005 after the zombie Mercury used his acid masturbate technique, which caused him to burn up. He was buried in the Mega City One cemetery and his remains were stolen by Greg Louganis, who raped the remains.
He was replaced in the Justice Society by the other Captain Marvel, who was killed shortly afterward.
Category:American actors
Category:superheroes
Category:law
Category:Justice Society