Perversion for Prophets

Perversion for Prophets was a cheap, hardcore Bulgarian porno piece of reactionary propaganda documentary film, fear mongering over discussing the assertation that the Queers Were Taking Over America! via distribution of cheap hardcore pornography involving several prophets, including: Yahoshua "the Messiah" Christ, M'Hammad, Stephen Fry, Adolf Hitler, the Dali Llama and "Chuckles" Mao Tse-Tongue-in-Cheek.
== History ==
The film was based off the show The Apprentice and was originally going to be called Perversion for Profits, in which Alan Sugar would have sex with various budding entrepeneurs for money. However, this idea was soon scrapped when Mary Whitehouse became director of the film, in which she decided to make a propaganda film to show to the "filthy" BBC (not that BBC!) how to clean up their act, alongside renowned wanker George McPuttin'Em in Their Place (shortened to "Mr. Putnam" or "Mr. Closet").
The salacious educational material was originally distributed in 1961 by Porn Hub™ and in 1969 by Citizens for Indecent Literature, Inc., who both described the film as "hilariously shitmongering fucktrumpetry" and "actually improved the quality of our porn." Following this embarrassment, and after boycotts of the film by the Pornographers for the Extermination of Terrestrial Animals, Pope Francis and Mooamar al al-Gquataffi, production of this film was halted for several centuries.
== What went down? ==
Jesús (J-dawg), described in the film as "an honest Mexican farmer," was the main character, alongside Mr. Putnam. J-dawg and Putnam intended the film to be an exposé of those who were behind the scenes of this homo-fascist agenda including, but not limited to: Communist Jesus, the Scientologists, Mormons, your mum, gay people, the Bio-Jews, Freebutchers, people who use the term "exposé", Jehovah's Witnesses, Satan, and Oscar Wilde, who became involved in the filmmaking after a tragic breakup with the Prophet Fry, over who should be on top of whom during intercourse.
The documentary begins by George Putnam looking directly into the camera, claiming that he is "perverted". He then goes on to explain how he became a pervert, quoting from various gay magazines (such as the Communist Manifesto and Mein Kampf), while a group of queers are shown masturbating over these magazines, with a voice-over of a young man repeating famous political slogans in a husky tone.
This documentary film also featured a selection of previously unheard of speeches from Margaret Thatcher, a trade union leader for Yorkshire mining communities, civil rights advocate and part-time stand-up comedienne, who was dubbed "the MILF catcher," due to her participation in the Great Anti-Pornography Crusade of 1886, in which several MILFs were shot by Mrs Thatcher alone, an action praised by her long-time boyfriend comrade-in arms, Augusto Pinochet as "really fascist and authoritarian, I love it!" It is believed that her background against the wankers and porno-readers were what impressed Putnam to include her arousing (but not that kind of arousing) speeches in the film.
== Reaction ==
Upon hearing of hardcore gay pornography bearing his name, the Prophet Muhammad was heard to have been impressed outraged at the sheer bestiality so prevalent in these films that he bought all available copies of the film, passing them onto gay Jesus and Saddam Hussein. They agreed with the Prophet, and burnt all copies that were not distributed amongst their friends, family or random people on the street.
"Chuckles" Mao was also deeply unimpressed, who led The Not-So-Great Proletarian Anti-Pornographic Cultural Revolution against Putnam, Whitehouse, Jesús, U.S. Imperialism and their Running Dogs the year after official release. All copies of Perversion for Prophets were displayed at Tiananmen Square, which is what the square is most commonly known for in China and absolutely nothing else.
== Legacy ==
Thanks to this film, the gays now no longer exist and America is a free, democratic, porn-free country.
Category:Pr0n
Category:Stuff that lonely men masturbate over
Category:People who could benefit from getting laid more often
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