T-72

T-72/A/B/AV/BV/M etc.	T-72/A/B/AV/BV/M etc.
 	
T-72M2 	T-72M2
Type 	Main Battle Tank
Place Of Origin 	Brezhnevstan
In Service 	1973 - today (somehow)
Main Armament 	125mm 2A46 smoothbore potato launcher
Secondary Armament 	7.62mm PKT coaxial machine gun and 12.7mm NSFW machine gun for anti-aircraft sake
Armor 	Stalinium
Engine 	V-46 Diesel engine (780 HP)
Mass 	46 tons (T-72B3)
The T-72 is a mass-produced main battle tank, distinct from any misconceptions of being a "pile-type" tank. Developed in a humble workshop in the Ural region, it mysteriously emerged as one of the most successful tanks in military history. Its combination of rugged design, ease of production, and effective combat capabilities have solidified its place as a cornerstone of armored warfare across the globe.
== Development ==
thumb|206x206px|Second ingredience.
In the mid-1960s, a certain Gopninkov in the Ural Mountains embarked on a peculiar and ambitious mission. With a knack for improvisation and a questionable collection of materials, he managed to "acquire" 20 tons of wheels, 800 garbage bins, and three drainage pipes. This assortment of unlikely components formed the foundation of what would become one of the most successful tanks in military history.
By 1968, Gopninkov’s prototype—a rough and ready creation cobbled together from these eclectic materials—caught the eye of high-ranking Soviet officials." These officials, intrigued and amused by the ingenuity on display, decided to take a closer look at Gopninkov's work. To their surprise, the prototype showed promise despite its unconventional origins. Impressed by his creativity and resourcefulness, they christened the prototype "Object 172."
Over the next few years, the prototype underwent a series of significant modifications. Engineers added an automatic loading system, a feature that was quite advanced for its time and increased the tank's rate of fire. They also incorporated a pedal power system—an eccentric but effective solution to some of the early power issues. These and other enhancements gradually transformed the initial prototype into a formidable piece of military hardware.
Finally, in 1973, after numerous tweaks and improvements, the tank was officially adopted into service as the T-72. This once-ragtag assemblage of junkyard finds had evolved into a sophisticated and robust main battle tank. The T-72 quickly proved its worth on the battlefield, solidifying its place in history as a symbol of Soviet engineering ingenuity and pragmatism. 
== Variants (Not all of them) ==
The T-72 has evolved through various iterations, each more “dangerous” for its crew than the last. Let’s take a darkly humorous journey through the variants of this legendary tank, from its humble beginnings to its latest "improvements."
==== T-72 Ural (1973) ====
The original T-72, also known as the T-72 Ural, burst onto the scene in 1973. Featuring a 125mm 2A26 smoothbore cheap potato gun and composite armor, it proudly included an automatic loader, reducing the crew size to three—because why have an extra person when you can rely on potentially unreliable Soviet technology? This version set the precedent for a series of upgrades that ensured the crew always felt a little less safe.
==== T-72A (1979) ====
Next came the T-72A in 1979, with several "improvements" over the original model.Uses the classic 2A46 smoothbore cheap potato gun which can be used for a longer period of time. It boasted enhanced armor, including composite inserts in the turret, perfect for giving the crew a false sense of security. Smoke grenade launchers were added, offering an additional way for the tank to look intimidating while still being vulnerable. The new 1K13 sighting system allowed for better target acquisition, assuming it worked properly under battlefield conditions.
==== T-72B (1985) ====
The T-72B variant from 1985 took things to a new level of "safety" for its crew. This model featured improved composite armor, including Kontakt-1 explosive reactive armor—because nothing says safety like explosives attached to your tank. The fire control system was upgraded, and it could launch guided missiles, adding to the long list of things that could go wrong. And, of course, it finally included night vision capabilities, so the crew could see their doom coming in the dark.
==== T-72M (1980s) ====
The T-72M, intended for export, featured downgraded armor and electronics—perfect for ensuring that allied crews experienced the full thrill of vulnerability. This variant was a testament to the idea that everyone deserves a chance to feel the excitement of potential catastrophic failure.
==== T-72B1 (1980s) ====
The T-72B1, a stripped-down version of the T-72B, lacked the ability to launch guided missiles. This ensured that crews could focus on the more traditional methods of combat, without the distraction of advanced weaponry actually functioning as intended.
==== T-72M1 (1980s) ====
The T-72M1, another export variant, featured additional armor compared to the T-72M. However, it still lacked many of the advanced features of the domestic versions, ensuring that international crews could enjoy the same level of danger and unpredictability.
==== T-72S (1987) ====
The T-72S was an export version of the T-72B, featuring improved armor and the ability to fire guided missiles. This variant provided a unique blend of enhanced offensive capability and consistent crew risk, maintaining the tank's legacy of excitement.
==== T-72BA (2000s) ====
Moving into the 21st century, the T-72BA saw the addition of Kontakt-5 explosive reactive armor (Of course some stupid Russians replaced Kontakt-5 with Kontakt-1) and improved fire control systems. These updates aimed to modernize the tank while keeping the crew on their toes, with night vision capabilities to ensure that danger was visible around the clock.
==== T-72B3 (2010) ====
The T-72B3 variant from 2010 featured substantial upgrades, including a new fire control system, a more powerful engine, and advanced thermal imaging. These enhancements made the tank more lethal, while still preserving the cherished tradition of crew vulnerability.
==== T-72B3 Mod. 2023 ====
The latest variant, the T-72B3 Mod. 2023, includes even more advanced armor, a digital fire control system, and enhanced crew protection measures. However, given the tank's history, one can only wonder what new and exciting ways it might find to keep its crew on the edge of their seats.
== Special ammo-loading system ==
The T-72's automatic loading system is a marvel of Soviet engineering, designed to streamline operations and reduce the crew size to three. But don't be fooled by the convenience—this system brings its own unique set of thrills and potential hazards.
The T-72's autoloader is designed to handle the heavy lifting, so the crew can focus on more important tasks, like wondering if the next round will fire correctly. This system consists of a carousel-type loader located below the turret, capable of holding 22 rounds. When activated, the autoloader selects a round, positions it, and rams it into the breech—all within about 7-8 seconds.
Sounds efficient, right? But here's the catch: the carousel loader rotates at a dizzying speed, creating a ballet of high-speed machinery right next to the crew. The nickname "You Don't Load the Gun - The Gun Loads You" isn't just a joke; it's a reflection of the system's occasionally terrifying independence. If a crew member is careless, they could easily find themselves on the receiving end of the loader’s mechanical embrace. There have been unfortunate incidents where the loader has snagged limbs or equipment, reminding everyone involved that the T-72’s autoloader is not to be taken lightly.
==== The T-72 Turret: A Gateway to the Cosmos ====
The T-72 has a unique approach to ammunition storage that sets it apart from its Western counterparts. While Western tanks typically store ammunition in the rear of the turret, in hermetically sealed compartments designed to minimize the risk to the crew, the T-72 keeps its ammunition in a ring around the turret—a decision that has some interesting and potentially catastrophic implications.
* Ammunition Storage: The ammunition is stored in a carousel under the turret, encircling the crew. This makes for quick access and faster loading times, but it also means that the crew is sitting in a potential bomb. In a battle scenario, this design choice prioritizes speed over safety.
* Crew Risk: In the event of a direct hit to the turret, the stored ammunition can detonate, transforming the tank into an impromptu space program. The force of such an explosion can blow the turret clean off the tank, sending it skyward in a spectacular—and tragic—display. Unlike Western tanks with their hermetically sealed compartments that direct explosions away from the crew, the T-72’s design ensures that any hit has the potential to be catastrophic.
* Explosive Details: The turret is colloquially known for its tendency to become a "jack-in-the-box" when hit. The explosion can be so powerful that it propels the turret high into the air, occasionally launching it hundreds of meters away. This phenomenon has led to grim jokes among tank crews about the T-72’s ability to "launch Ivan into space" when things go wrong.
* Material and Construction: The T-72's construction reflects the belief in the durability of Russian soldiers, colloquially referred to as being made of Stalinium (As Vladolf says) This mythical material supposedly gives them the resilience to withstand conditions that would incapacitate lesser men. This tongue-in-cheek term underscores the expectation that Russian tank crews endure and overcome challenges that other armies might deem unacceptable.
== Specs (T-72 Ural & T-72B3 M2023) ==
=== T-72 Ural ===
This marvel of Soviet ingenuity was birthed during an era when tank designers valued simplicity above all else, with little concern for crew survival. The result? A steel coffin on tracks that rolls toward certain death, carrying three unfortunate souls, some explosives, and a turret ready to break orbit.
==== General: ====
* Crew: 3 poor comrades (Commander, Gunner, Driver), sitting ducks inside a barely habitable metal box. For added fun, there’s the autoloader, a mechanical "friend" designed to spare the need for a fourth crew member while putting everyone else’s life at risk.
* Weight: 41 tons. Feels light, right? That’s because it’s filled with enough explosives to make even the most callous Soviet bureaucrat squirm. But don’t worry, if the tank is hit, no one will be left to notice the weight reduction.
* Length: 9.53 meters. You could almost call this tank a roadblock for enemy forces—assuming the enemy doesn’t just drive around it and laugh.
* Width: 3.46 meters. Enough room to feel claustrophobic but not enough to evade enemy fire. But let’s face it, the real problem is inside, not outside.
==== Armament: ====
* Main Gun: 125 mm 2A46 smoothbore gun, affectionately known as the potato launcher. Sure, it can fire APFSDS, HEAT, and high-explosive shells, but in reality, it’s more of a lottery. And the autoloader? It’s like Russian roulette, but with live ammunition.
** The autoloader rotates a carousel of shells, sitting conveniently beneath the crew. Let’s hope it picks the right round—or else it might send a Potato hurtling toward your target instead of 3BM-9 APFSDS. And don't even think about jamming—this autoloader is as reliable as the Soviet Union's promises of a communist utopia.
** When the autoloader malfunctions (because it will), Ivan might find himself becoming the next projectile, launched with the same gusto that’s supposed to be reserved for the enemy.
==== Ammunition Storage: ====
* Let’s talk ammo storage, the absolute pinnacle of Soviet death-trap engineering. Your 40 rounds of ammunition are stored around the crew, ready to turn the inside of the tank into a pressure cooker.
* One well-placed hit from any enemy with half-decent accuracy? Boom—turret launch! The T-72 is infamous for turning its turret into a Soyuz rocket, rocketing off into the sky in a fiery blaze, and leaving the rest of the tank a flaming pit of regrets. Don’t worry, though—there’s a 100% chance the crew won’t feel a thing (because they’ll be dead).
==== Protection: ====
* Composite armor was cutting-edge—50 years ago. Now, it might as well be cardboard. Your best bet is hoping the enemy doesn’t have modern weapons, because the armor won’t do much against anything made after the 1970s.
* There’s no ERA (Explosive Reactive Armor), because who needs that? Not the Soviets. After all, if your tank is going to blow up, at least go out with a bang.
==== Mobility (Survival Is Optional): ====
* Engine: V-46 780 hp diesel engine—strong enough to get you to the battlefield but not necessarily off it.
* Top Speed: 60 km/h, meaning you’ll arrive just in time to be obliterated by enemy fire.
* Range: 500 km, assuming you don’t break down first, or run out of fuel, or blow up.
==== Stabilizer (Why Bother?): ====
* The 2E28 stabilizer is a cruel joke. First-shot hit probability is somewhere around 60% on a good day, but if you’re in motion, just forget it. You’ll be lucky to hit anything that’s moving. Think of it as playing darts on a rollercoaster blindfolded—you’re not hitting the bullseye, comrade.
=== T-72B3 obr. 2023 ===
Fast forward to 2023, and the Russians, instead of building a completely new tank, decided to duct-tape modern technology onto the old T-72 and call it an upgrade. But beneath all the fancy gadgets, it’s still a cosmic death machine, complete with all the old flaws. Sure, it’s better at night vision, but when your turret is going to the moon, what difference does it make?
==== General: ====
* Crew: Still the same 3 doomed men (Commander, Gunner, Driver) cramped in the same old Soviet-designed interior. The autoloader is still there, gleefully counting down the seconds until it messes up and catapults a shell—or Potato—into the wrong place.
* Weight: 46 tons, thanks to the extra armor and electronics, but this just means you’ll sink faster into the mud—and take longer to retrieve after your inevitable destruction.
* Length: 9.53 meters. Still unwieldy, still a perfect target for anyone with half a brain.
* Width: 3.59 meters. More space for all the useless gadgets they’ve crammed inside, but don’t expect to live long enough to enjoy them.
==== Armament: ====
* Main Gun: Still the 125 mm 2A46M-5 smoothbore gun—it can fire the latest APFSDS, HEAT, and ATGMs, but also any vegetable that happens to be lying around in the tank. Potatoes? Peas? Turnips? The autoloader doesn’t care. It’ll send anything flying if it fits the breech.
* Ammunition:
** 3BM60 APFSDS: One of the few things that actually works. Capable of penetrating modern armor—but only if the autoloader doesn’t decide to take a break.
** HEAT rounds: Slightly more effective than in the Ural, but still not enough to stop modern tanks from laughing in your face.
** 9M119 Refleks ATGM: Now you can hit targets from kilometers away—assuming your autoloader hasn’t mistaken a potato for a missile.
==== Ammunition Storage: ====
* Ammo is still stored all around the crew because apparently, that part of the design hasn’t changed. Sure, you now have Relikt ERA, which might make you feel safer—for about 2 seconds before the tank gets hit and your turret takes off.
* The turret’s explosive ejection system is still here, so expect it to exit the battlefield in a blaze of glory when the ammo cooks off. In case you wanted to re-enact Sputnik in the middle of a firefight.
==== Protection: ====
* Relikt ERA is an improvement—better than nothing, but still not enough to stop the T-72B3 from being a mobile coffin. You’ll last a bit longer in battle, but don’t get too comfortable. Death is still just a shell away.
* Still no Active Protection System. Why would you need one when you’ve got sheer Soviet hope?
==== Mobility: ====
* Engine: V-92S2F 1,130 hp diesel engine—a better engine than the Ural, giving you a bit more power. But at the end of the day, you’re still moving toward death.
* Top Speed: 70 km/h, because if you’re going to explode, you might as well do it faster.
* Range: 550 km. Longer than the Ural, but still not enough to escape from the grim reality of your fate.
==== Stabilizer: ====
* Sosna-U fire control system and an improved stabilizer mean you have a better chance of hitting something on the first try, but don’t kid yourself—it’s still a T-72. Your chances of missing are better than ever, especially when the autoloader gets confused and serves up the wrong round. You’ll be lucky if your first shot doesn’t turn into an international incident involving vegetables.
== Combat Use and Reputation ==
The reputation of the T-72 series is a fascinating tale of rise and fall, from being one of the most widespread tanks during the Cold War to becoming the butt of jokes after its dismal performance in modern conflicts. Let’s take a cynical journey through how this Soviet tank went from being a feared symbol of Soviet armored might to a flaming wreck with a reputation for turret-launching theatrics.
=== Cold War Fear: The Era of "Нас много" (We Are Many) ===
During the Cold War, the T-72 represented the backbone of Soviet armored forces. Western analysts were terrified—not because it was the best tank, but because of the sheer number of them. The Soviet doctrine of "Нас много" (We Are Many) was simple: overwhelm the enemy by sheer mass of steel and firepower, flooding the battlefield with hundreds, if not thousands, of T-72s. The idea was that while one T-72 might not be great, when you have a hundred of them rolling toward NATO positions, it would be hard to stop them all.
The T-72 Ural's simplicity, its autoloader, and its ability to be mass-produced gave the Soviets the confidence that they could steamroll through Western Europe. And in theory, this was terrifying. The West worried not about the individual performance of each tank, but about the Soviet Union's ability to simply keep sending them, one after the other, like an endless tide of iron, regardless of losses. If one tank went up in flames? No problem—another ten were right behind it. The idea of T-72s advancing en masse across the plains of Europe was the stuff of NATO nightmares.
But then… reality hit.
=== Gulf War: Welcome to the "Kerbal Space Program" ===
The Gulf War of 1991 was the first real test of the T-72 against a modern, well-equipped Western force. And it didn’t go well—at all. The Iraqi army, equipped with T-72 variants, faced off against U.S.-led coalition forces equipped with far superior tanks like the M1 Abrams. The result? The T-72s were torn apart.
If Cold War doctrine relied on quantity over quality, the Gulf War showed that even a lot of garbage is still garbage. The most infamous aspect of the T-72’s design came to light: its poor ammunition storage. One direct hit to the tank would cause the ammunition to cook off, launching the turret into the sky like a rocket—giving birth to the now-famous "Kerbal Space Program" jokes. Footage of T-72 turrets sailing through the air, as if auditioning for the next Soviet space program, became iconic. It wasn’t exactly the fearsome war machine the Soviets had advertised.
The Gulf War cemented the T-72’s reputation as a deathtrap. Western tanks simply outclassed it in every way. The T-72’s armor was easily penetrated, its autoloader was prone to malfunction, and its overall design was laughably outdated. What was once the Soviet Union’s pride turned into a global embarrassment, with military analysts, soldiers, and armchair generals alike all realizing that the T-72 was a relic of a bygone era, no match for modern warfare.
=== Modern Conflict: Ukraine and the Same Old Problems ===
Fast forward to the present, and the T-72's legacy of failure continues. In the ongoing war in Ukraine, the Russian forces have deployed various upgraded versions of the T-72, including the T-72B3, supposedly modernized with better optics, armor, and fire control systems. Yet, despite all the upgrades, the core flaws remain.
The autoloader, while slightly improved, is still infamous for its mechanical unpredictability—and yes, it can still misfire and send a turret soaring skyward. The ammunition storage around the crew hasn't fundamentally changed, meaning that a well-placed hit still has the potential to turn the tank into a fireball of Soviet nostalgia. The much-hyped Relikt ERA (Explosive Reactive Armor) has done little to change the fact that T-72s in Ukraine keep exploding in spectacular fashion.
In fact, the T-72 has once again become a symbol of how quantity without quality leads to disaster. Russia, continuing the Soviet tradition of "Нас много", has deployed these tanks in large numbers. But just like in Iraq, the T-72s are proving to be cannon fodder for modern anti-tank weapons like the Javelin and NLAW. Videos of Russian T-72s being obliterated by Ukrainian forces, with their turrets performing their now-famous kerbal maneuvers, have once again made the T-72 a meme more than a military asset.
Russian crews, even in upgraded models, still face a 65-75% first-hit probability, worse than the Leopard 2A4, a tank 20 years older. The stabilizer is a Soviet relic, meaning that any attempt to fire on the move is akin to rolling the dice—chances are, you’ll miss, and if you don’t, well, let’s just hope the autoloader hasn’t decided to jam.
The T-72's role in Ukraine has cemented its place as a symbol of outdated Soviet military doctrine, where more is always better—even if what you have more of is exploding steel coffins. Turret launches, poor crew survivability, and catastrophic ammo storage remain the defining characteristics of this tank, even in 2023.
=== Conclusion: From Fear to Farce ===
The T-72 went from being a feared juggernaut in Cold War scenarios to a laughingstock after the Gulf War, and now, in Ukraine, it continues to perform its tragic ballet of destruction. What was once seen as a formidable threat due to sheer numbers has become an icon of Soviet and Russian military incompetence.
The T-72 remains a symbol of another era, a time when the doctrine of "Нас много" seemed like a plausible path to victory. But in modern warfare, it’s clear that no matter how many you send, a tank with a turret that’s ready to hit orbit is only good for entertainment—not for winning wars.
Category:Tanks
Category:Soviet Russia
Category:Russia
Category:Stupidity
Category:Stuff that God hates
pl:T-72