read this piece by +Top Gear's Jeremy Clarkson carefully and don't tell you haven't been warned." I’ve just spent a week in Russia where manners don’t seem to have been invented. When a hotel receptionist needs your passport, she doesn’t say, “Would it be possible to see your passport for a moment, sir, if it isn’t too much trouble?” She says, “Passport”. And if you can’t find it within three seconds, she says, “Now!”When you order a dish from a menu that isn’t available, there’s no tiresome hand-wringing explanation from the waiter. He just says, “It’s off”. And if you are struggling to get your luggage through a revolving door, no one waits patiently until you’ve sorted the problem out. They repeatedly shove the handles until everything in your suitcase is smashed and your fingers have been severed.When a British Top Gear fan wants my photograph, they spend hours explaining how their son watches the show on Dave and how he can impersonate me and how it’s a religion in their house. Whereas in Russia they just say, “Photo”. And if they don’t happen to have a camera, you are told to stay where you are until they have been back to their house and got one. Ever been stuck behind two British people while waiting for a ski lift? “After you.” “No, you were here first.” “No, really. I’m sure you were.” “Oh, it’s OK. I don’t mind waiting. It’s such a lovely day.” “Much warmer than last year.” After a while you are consumed with an urgent need to stab both of them with your poles.Queuing is much easier in Russia — because no one bothers. You just walk to the front and if anyone objects — this actually happened — you pull out your wallet and show the complainant your credit cards. This is Russian for, “I am richer than you, sunshine, so shut up.”It’s the same in what we call polite discussion. You don’t dress up counter-arguments with subtle innuendo. Russians just say, “You’re wrong” and move on. Here’s one conversation I had:— "Jews are running the world.— I hear what you say, but I don’t think that’s the case.— You’re wrong.— But there are plenty of examples...— I said, you’re wrong."Being British, it’s all very upsetting. But after a while I started to realise that being impolite saves an awful lot of time and costs you nothing. When someone is wasting your evening with their harebrained nonsense, just tell them they are wrong and walk away. When you are in a butcher’s shop, don’t bother with small talk. Just say, “Two chops” and wait to be told the price. When someone is dawdling on the pavement, push them out of the way. And in a bar, don’t try to catch the barman’s eye. Just shout what you want from the back of the queue.It certainly works on Aeroflot. Planes set off before everyone is seated, and when you are coming in to land, you don’t get any rubbish from the pilot about the weather and he doesn’t wish you a safe onward journey. You are told to sit up straight and to remain seated until the plane has stopped. Which no one does."